Hi friends! We were having issues with the video getting restricted when we added the chapter marks to the description. So we thought we would pin them here for anyone who needs them. Thanks for your support! 00:00:00 Intro 00:03:37 Her dad married 14 women....some were siblings 00:08:08 They start grooming them to get married at 2 or 3 yrs old 00:13:14 Explaining "Personal Progress" for young girls 00:14:53 "Casual touching" guidance sheet Shanell got as a young girl 00:20:22 You will be cursed if you don't follow the dating rules 00:22:45 "You may marry one of your siblings here..." 00:26:08 How Shanell "got direction" on who to marry 00:34:18 TW: SA and DV 00:39:19 Is this type of harmful behavior common in The Order? 00:42:10 They were discouraged from calling the Police 00:43:32 TW: DV depictions 00:49:00 Shanell planned to stay with him even after he was arrested 00:49:33 TW: attempted sui**de 00:51:39 TW: r*pe, DV 00:56:43 The Order kept her money when she escaped 00:57:31 Shanell is invited back to church by the prophet as a non-member 01:00:53 Life after The Order- Her entire world crashed down 01:02:55 When Shanell started working on "Escaping Polygamy" 01:05:18 Life after "Escaping Polygamy" filmed 01:11:24 What brings Shanell joy now 01:15:30 Linda, listen
I worked with a woman who was hemorrhaging which got worse with time. She only consulted her male spiritual guide. She nearly died. All of us at work insisted that she go to the doctor, then eventually to the ER. Her spiritual guide insisted that she not go. We were appalled. She did go to the ER. She was hospitalized.
I love hearing from Shanell, because she has no fecks to give. She doesn't sugar coat it, she doesn't protect anyone, she calls them out in good honest language that is not full of euphemisms meant to make people comfortable. She speaks bluntly and honestly and leaves no room for the BS excuses that Narcissists are so good at using. Im proud of you girl, never let them tell you you need to change your style. YOU are a warrior, and you know it, and we know it. Words are your weapon. Use them.
I love how raw Shanell is. Her ability to be so open and honest is inspiring. Escaping Polygamy opened my eyes to the brain washing and control of these groups.
It’s so messed up. They are raised to breed and keep the cycle going. Their daughters will end up just like them and their sons will either become like their father or kicked out to the streets at a young age. And the inbreeding they force upon these people by making them marry close family members is horrid. What a sad life.
I hate to hear someone that gets abused, have to comfort the abuser because they feel sooooo bad about what they done. That is the biggest bunch of garbage. Its nothing but a manipulative way to get past the situation.
Its common and its even what people like the Pearls teach that children should do, hug their parents and tell them they love them after their parents beat them for hours
How is Shanell so smart and open after being raised and abused by the Kingstons?? She and her sisters and cousins are such bright lights for overt and covert misogyny. ❤️
I left mainstream Mormonism 30 years ago. I recently found my personal progress book AND the little cheap bracelet where you collected the colored stones for each achievement you got signed off on. There was also a book called Becoming a Young Woman. Oh man.. I couldn’t even make myself open them. I threw them away. I’m so glad I’ve run across your podcast. I honestly didn’t know I was even in a cult till a couple weeks ago when I found you. My eyes are wide open and I’m so thankful I’m stubborn and felt the wrong doings in my gut and had the strength to say no and walk away. Keep doing what you are doing! ❤
@@kirsten1339 I was born in the 90s and also heard the chewed gum, plucked flower, in addition to "licked cupcake" and "lollipop that fell in the dirt" and the more obscure "you have 2 keys to a treasure chest and if you don't protect your key because you gave it away to so many boys, then you can never open the 'real treasure' with your husband later, even if he saved his key for you; you've thrown away the treasure altogether". Also remember reading... "What do kisses mean when handed out like pretzels and robbed of sacredness?” (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 281). and reading a general authority talking about kissing a spouse for the first time over the altar. Have seen other former Mormons describing lessons including 'icing licked off of a cake', 'peanut butter licked off of a sandwich', 'a board with multiple nails hammered in and leaving it full of holes'... Lovely lessons for the abuse survivor to have to hear, in particular -- and I've met a disturbing number of women who confessed they were abused as girls by their own fathers in this religion. The modus operandi of the LDS church is gaslighting...Because the truth of the religion and their history would make any reasonable person turn away with disgust. They have to lie to maintain membership, and for PR. As per Gordon Hinckley, "I don't know that we teach that; I don't know that we emphasise it" etc... Such dishonesty. It's definitely valuable to look at the older manuals. I remember seeing a pamphlet (For the Strength of Youth, probably?) from an earlier generation talking about how women shouldn't go out with their hair in curlers, and how they should wear tasteful makeup, but not too much, or something. (Just looked it up, '1965 For the Strength of Youth', a site called scribd has a pdf of it.) Also, if you search "Exploring “For the Strength of Youth” from 1990-2022" there's someone who compared the different pamphlets during that time, just found their page by that title. People who remain in the LDS church have a powerful mental block preventing them from facing the issues with the religion; it's too frightening to have the belief system that most of them were born into thrown into question. 'Ignorance is bliss' for some people.
What I'm about to say is a self-evident statement, men inside religious cults don't want sassy and rebellious woman because it interferes with the template of men being in control of women 24/7. Us dudes outside of religious cults love rebellious and Sassy women. Such women are so much fun and keep us on our toes in the early dating phases, and keep us leveled and humble in our later dating phases. Stay sassy and rebellious.
@@carpenter28085 and as it should. Because it is. Except in a religious/ cult setting. Then you are expected to be subservient and stoically proper. which develops and cranks out boring women who lack spontaneity, creativity and just are not fun. To those types of Institutions sassy and rebellious are not what they're looking for.
I actually learned so much about the order by watching Escaping Polygamy. It was an eye opener. Wish it was still on. The people trapped in this order need so much help.
I know. When I first came across it a few years ago I was gobsmacked. I know many people are still helping the people without the cameras but it was amazing seeing them get released from that horrible life. The stories didn’t always end up with a perfect happy ending but I’m glad they were able to be saved.
It will never cease to amaze me how intelligent and truly tenacious all the people who find their way out of these groups/cults/high demand religions are. Particularly women who may have less access to the outside world and less control. They educate themselves so much and learn so much about the outside world in such a short amount of time, and take such a gamble on it when they leave. Truly incredible people.
Shanell, you gave THE BEST Linda Listen moment. "Search for the truth if it doesn't seem very clear" is a statement I will repeat and share with others.
I just binged the whole Escaping Polygamy series over the weekend... Like whoa the rabbit hole of crazy that is The Order... So glad Shanelle and what family they got out are out ❤
I loved that show. But it got reallllllly complicated on a legal level, and there are rumors that production was pushing their own ideas. And that was BEFORE Utah legalized polygamy. I'd love to see it come back, maybe with a Civil Rights Lawyer on the team.
Polygamy causes genetic bottlenecks because of how little diversity there is. Utah is apparently the top place in the world for uncovering genetic disorders - polygamy, prior isolation, people arriving and not leaving, good records.
Ive suggested to Amanda (Shanell's cousin) that if they're looking for a silver lining, they might be really useful to medical science, coming from such a small, traceable gene pool.
@@HitomiKitageThe Amish Is Actually The Culture She was Brought Up In, if you go watch Escaping Polygamy And, If you do your own research, The Order - Does Come From The Amish Background, Once you go checking the facts on your history, look at their clothing, that alone tells you it’s part of the same religious cult!
Shanell is obviously a very strong, intelligent, self-aware and capable young woman. What a wonderful example she sets for other women who find themselves in situations like this. Shelise, thank you for mentioning boundaries. That is so true, especially in a society where "everything" is out there for all the world to see and hear. Boundaries are more important than ever! Best to both of you! 🥰
Thank you for speaking so candidly about your trauma, I’ve been out of a very small doomsday cult for about two years now, the first year I spent in as much isolation from people as possible to avoid talking about it. This year I’ve been able to hold a steady job as a line cook and I’m doing much better, but none of my peers can really understand my experience. It’s a very lonely feeling, but I’m also glad they can’t relate to the trauma. It’s a difficult experience to convey if you haven’t experienced it, but you shouldn’t have to. Thank you for spreading empathy towards ex-members
I rarely get such a good feeling from people as I get from Shanell. She appears to be such an amazing person! She's strong, smart, genuine, caring and simply a joy to listen to.
As a Scandinavian, the fact that these cults are even allowed to exist in the US is absolutely mind blowing to me. Scandinavia is one of the most secular/non-religious places in the world, and even just “normal” religion is weird to a lot of people here. I just can’t fathom that there are so many places in the US were there are countless polygamous misogynistic cults and that they are just… allowed to do this to kids and adults.
it's probably due in some part to the sheer number of people who left the UK (or were kicked out) because of their religious beliefs...and left unchecked it sprouted all kinds of nasty abusive cults
@@adamguy33 no offense, but these cults being allowed to restrict education and physical autonomy and theologically imprison people seems like the _opposite_ of freedom lol
I love shanell and her cousins amd siblings that have left and have shared their stories. Amanda Rae, Jessica, Andrea, Val, Eskel, Priscilla, Shanell, Alison, Michelle, and anyone im forgetting....you are all such amazing people with resilience and strength and should all be so proud. Thanks for sharing your trauma and lives and most importantly, yourselves with us. I hope life continues to bless you all with joy and happiness and all the wonderful things you deserve!!!💜💜💜
@@Shanzy745 There are a lot of us out here pulling for you, and everyone else trapped in an abusive scenario. How are things working down there since decriminalization? Is CPS being more active?
@@bendyrland7213 Where I lived they were called family telephone poles. But we only had cousin marriages happening sometimes so it looks less tangled.
@@andrewinnkeeper1763Oh, I thought you misread "wreath" as "wealth" in the original comment. Out of curiosity, would you care to elaborate on why you brought up family wealth in a thread about family trees with so many entwining branches they might as well be a circle, aka wreath? (Not trying to be antagonistic, just interested in your thoughts!)
Oh personal progress 😂 I remember arguing with my young women’s leader about my divine nature project. I arranged some cute french horn quartets of hymns then recorded them and made videos of the recordings and she said it didn’t count and I said something along the lines of “my divine nature is as a French horn player, not a housewife” 😂
In this case, Mormons have never been considered evangelicals or Protestants by modern theology. have always been a sect founded on totally distorted views of the gospel.
It's hard for those of us who were not raised in a cult environment to understand just how strong, powerful and remarkable women like Shannell are - there was nothing in her life to prepare her for leaving, and she had to create an entirely new life in an unfamiliar environment after she left. This channel is a gift to all of us; thank you for giving these amazing warriors a platform, and allowing us all to get to know them. And thank you, Shannell, for your grace and generosity in sharing your story with us all.
I'm so happy Shanell decided to share her experience on your channel! I am from Salt Lake City, Utah as well. I loved watching Escaping polygamy! 💢My friend (who also loved the show) recognized Shanell at a Walmart but did not approach because she realizes that she is just living life and it was not appropriate being aware of her story to bother her. Parasocial relationships can be scary and unnerving. We understand completely! 🌹If I could tell Shanell one thing it would be that there are people out there who do recognize her but respect her personal space and her privacy.
You are amazing shanell. I just want to also applaud your mom for calling and reporting your ex. She was so brave in that moment and I am glad she helped you. You have had to go thru so much and I am glad you could escape. Thank you for being so open and honest about everything and I hope you can find peace in your life.
Thank you for pointing out that asking "Why don't they just leave?" is problematic. Learning to ask better questions like "How can I help?" or "What do they need?" is going to produce better results. I'm glad Shanel got out. It sounds like a much more peaceful life.
Love how open and honest you are able to be now, about that marriage experience Shanell❤❤❤ I remember seeing newly bruised arms that back in the order she knew not to tell me what actually happened, cuz I'd get myself into trouble with dealing with her ex 😅
It's time for people not only to help Kingston cult victims, but also to ask why Utah's law enforcement and courts aren't doing more to hold Daniel and his buddies accountable for their crimes.
“You can come back whenever you want…” “But you’re married, and the wife follows the husband” Sounds like you were welcome back only so long as you were potential marriage material
I heard this from a poligamy survival sometime, maybe even from this podcast: women are disempowered, but they are valuable for the cult. I wonder how they get rid of all of the men you would need to be out of the picture in order to be able to marry ten women to a single man. Are they all leaving on their own or are some of them kicked out against their will?
@@cassif19 the order allows the unmarried men to stay for volunteer slave labor, as they work to earn a wife... And Justify not paying them or not allowing them to get their own money. I've seen loyal members working until the age of 40 never married, and being told its just not their time yet, and god has a #1 choice she may not yet be of marriage age… practically training men for grooming practices, as it’s not uncommon for a 43 year old man to marry a 14-16 year old girl. Some men eventually learn to outsource a girl from other polygamist groups. The smarter good men leave the order to learn they were brainwashed… 😔
Something that always gets me emotional about those people is that the didn’t just save themselves, they created another path for their kids too. Her daughters will have a very different life because of the decisions that she made ❤
Yeah! He even told me it was my fault. That he was treating me that way because of me. Finally, when he'd tell me it was my fault or because of me I started responding, "Yeah. Cause I haven't left you yet." Knowing damn well, he was not going to change for me.
Shanell, I’ve seen different bits of your story on Escaping Polygamy, Amanda’s channel and now here. I want you to know I have an indescribable amount of respect for you. You didn’t deserve anything that happened to you in your life in the order. You and your siblings are amazing and I think that’s part of why you were demonised- you all stood up for yourselves, your mum and your siblings and they didn’t like that they couldn’t control you. The way you stood up for your mum in that awful house, the way you took care of your half sister when there were concerns about her mental state. You, Kolleen and Val are just unreal. I’m so so pleased that you escaped and seemingly (and hopefully) have found happiness and security now. All my love to you and to your siblings xxx
I am glad that you are in a better place. Abusers are so good at manipulation. Its like they all take classes: "Abuse 101". Across culture, religion, and everything else.
I appreciate when introverts and ambiverts share their stories. You have the right to reserve parts of yourself. Just sharing experiences on media is so personal and courageous.
“If I could fool them, maybe I could fool myself …” When she said this about her abusive ex, it hit me that perhaps this was her mother’s psychology, as well, in her marriage to Daniel. We learn how to relationship from those modeled in front of us.
I left an abusive relationship several years back. When I was watching Leaving Polygamy I recognized so much of the dynamic of my relationship in the ones I was watching. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I have no experience of mormonism or cults, but I have learned so much from all the people telling their stories on this channel. Thank you again for your courage,
Thank you Shanell for taking the time and emotional energy to share your story. Your appearences on Escaping Polygamy and C2C are helping so many people understand the truth of what goes on behind closed doors in these communities, and you have helped so many people escape abusive situations and start new lives. You are such a positive force in the world and I hope you know how much you are appreciated! You are a freaking rockstar. Much love ❣
I knew a woman who lost her arm due to DV and was in the hospital/mental health ward for months afterwards. I don't know exactly what happened (it's not a question that you ask) but she told me that it was the seperation for those several months that actually allowed her to see that he was evil -- not whatever thing he had done to her that had caused her to lose her arm. Abusers are very convincing, and I'm glad she got out.
Stephen Hassan, he created the BITE model, said something similar. He was in the moonies, completely brainwashed, then he was in a major car crash and was being cared for by his sister who wasn't in the cult. Even just those few days away from the cult helped push him out but then his dad actually got him to deprogrammers, watching him say so calmly I threatened to kill my father because I was told the deprogrammers were evil. He's spent the last few decades helping people get out of cults
Being kicked out of this group sounds a whole like what being out of Scientology is like, being shunned, losing friends, exiting, no financial help, etc.
I love that she's so forthcoming about all this! With the context, it makes sense that she or another girl would pick their cousin. They're teens and it's who they are around more often. I'm not saying it's right to marry your cousin, but when you're a child and it's all around you, I can see why it happens.
The most important thing I have learned from Cult’s to Consciousness is an understanding of how lucky I was to get out so easily, still retaining the full support of my family. While I never asked anyone to their face, I have certainly been guilty of questioning, “Why don’t they just leave?” as well as, “how can they not see through this?” I continue to gain understanding and compassion from every guest and from your insightful questions, framing and guidance. Thank you.
I appreciated Shanell's candidness but I even more appreciated her conscience section. Hearing what it's like to be on the other side of questions people ask just because they see you on their phone or tv was insightful. Perspective is everything.
My religious trauma definitely isn't as deep, but I could really relate to some parts. Like not seeing real options in the pool you're supposed to marry from, father saying no one would want me because I was too much/too rebellious. She seems like such a nifty person. I'm glad she's happier now.
This woman has the most stunning eyes!! As a woman, I empathize deeply with her sad story. Sadder still is the reality that there are so many more like her in the LDS who are suffering silently.
I am so happy and proud (though I don't know you) of you for taking that insanely hard step to leave and bring awareness to the world. By letting people know what goes on behind closed doors, you're opening peoples eyes and helping people get out.
So glad to see Shanell looking healthy. I was so worried about her when she became so thin. I didn't watch this show when it originally aired on TV so I am Unaware if this subject matter was addressed. I apologize to anyone offended, not my Intention, just an observation from the episodes I have seen. Shanell by far is one of the strongest I have ever seen
Shanell, you're so awesome! I love your innate sense of truth and honesty especially when facing all those bullies. I really feel for you! Your strength and bravery is absolutely inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing.
SHELISE.... I just freaking found out that this was almost my life. I have always known I have family who has a ton of kids and are very religious, right... they are my moms cousins. I got curious and just did some digging and found out they attended Brigham Young University and are LDS. 🤯 I wish my mom and grandma were still alive for me to ask them more about this side of our family and how this didn't become our reality. I have so many questions, and I feel so Flippin lucky for whatever split happened to prevent my brother and I from living his life. Insane!!!!! 😮
You are very brave for taking the first step in breaking the cycle of abuse. Wishing you health; happiness and a future filled with peace and self-love.
I love Shanell! She has the most amazing eyes! And we all know the eyes are the window to the soul... I love that Shanell was strong enough to finally leave.. it's got to be the hardest thing to leave everything you know and love.. but your soul knew it wasn't the way to live.. and in turn, you honor yourself and your Source- given spirit. Thank you for sharing your story and continuing to share the truth of the Order. Many blessings to you both!
I've been married for over fifty years to a narcissist and people have asked 'why don't you just leave?' It's not always possible. It sure isn't an easy thing to do!! I applaud you ladies for having left.
I'm so glad Shanell got away from her cous-band, and The Order. Her strength to move forward and help others leave, is phenomenal. It is a huge sacrifice to be in the public eye, and to do that in order to help others, is so generous, and kind!The show was more than 'public entertainment', it was healing and helpful for many.
Shanell, Thank you so much for your bravery. You a beautiful exsample of, " The Truth shall set you Free ". It's help more people than you'll ever know. You've done you part. Please Enjoy your girls, hubby and free life!
Shanell I won't tell that I can even pretend to understand what you've gone through. I think you are incredibly brave in sharing your story. You relayed so much information that I didn't realize what goes on in these groups. So thank you so much.
Sadly this is still such an important conversation. I experienced very similar marital abuse to Shanell, in my case I now realise through watching this channel, my upbringing in a cult made me the ideal victim. I wish I had known when I was younger, about boundaries and what to look out for. Thank you both for speaking about this and Shanell well done for being so brave and getting out while you were young. Yes there are repercussions and I totally understand the desire to stay at home in safety! Wishing you peace going forward and happiness raising your family❤
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. It is so brave to be so vulnerable. Your kids are very fortunate that you are strong and will make sure they can skip this horrible and unfair experience. ❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much for your willingness to revisit your traumas in order to help so many others. Sending thoughts and prayers that all of your wounds are healed and that you truly experience happiness and joy in your lives! Brave women rock! 🙏💗
Shannell, you are an amazing graceful human being and I hope you continue to find the healing you more than deserve. You are a wonderful mother and it's so evident how much you love your children and your animals and I'm so thankful that the Order couldn't break your warrior spirit. Please remember to always relax and take time to rest your spirit when you need it. ❤❤
I cannot begin to choose words for how inspiring you all are - I just want to say thank you. I’m trying to recover from ptsd trauma caused by abuse and coercive control in just one very short relationship and a pattern with friends and narcissists my whole life, I see so many similarities in that my strong and curious but loving personality and the fact I argued back made it worse - but you give me strength! But honestly my situation is nothing compared and I just can’t thank you enough for empowering me. Im so sorry these things happened to you and I just wish more people would approach things with an assumption of love rather than judgement xx
Shenelle you are such a source of strength ❤ I admire you soooo much ❤❤ I'm so sorry for the pain you endured. No one deserves that, I hope you can dismantle this "church" and free your family ❤
As a woman who escaped abuse, I applaud you. It was not easy. I held on thinking it would get better. I never told anyone even my parents hoping it would get better and not wanting to put him in a bad light. Thank God you got out as I did. You are courageous and should be so proud of yourself! ❤️❤️
I'm glad you got out Bonnie. I got out too. It's been 10 years and I still get blamed for him "bear hugging" me. But for some, it never happened. All I know is, I'm happy to be free. Blessings to you. I hope your life is better now.
Thank you so much for sharing your story so freely here, Shanell. I really appreciated your comments about asking you about your experience - those of us who ask want to just pour so much love down your throat because we just can't imagine how much you've been through and we want to just wipe it away - not realizing it's best to love on the terms of the survivor. We do wish we had magic wands to wipe every tear away, but that is not how it works. As you said in so many words, it's peeling the layers of the onion away. Sometimes there are new things that crop up over time that we didn't realize were still there. It is a never ending process. We all have our own journey with our traumas. I wish you the very best with your girls, your animals, and your plants! I love that you have a place to feel free to love and be loved. Bless you (not in a culty way!) and all good and peaceful things to you as you continue your heroic work with other survivors. To you too, Shelise!
Shelise another wonderful interview ❤ you find a way to let people speak their stories, reinforce that what happened to these people was not ok, and frequently you can find some humor or a silver lining ❤ I imagine you have a lot of anger and sorrow- how do you deal? Yoga? Cardio?
Thank you for all you do for the people trying to get out Shanell. You and your sisters are living your truth and it’s a beautiful thing. Thank you for sharing your life with us. And it’s not rude to tell people that walk up to you on the street and want to get your life story that you are not up to talking about it. You have every right to expect privacy and respect when going about your daily life
I have watched a number of your videos and I just want to say that you are a wonderful interviewer. You ask probing, intelligent questions, yet you are so empathetic towards your guests.
Thank you ladies for these two episodes ❤️ Thank you Shanell for wanting to share your story with us, complete strangers ❤ Warm greetings from Belgium ❤
They added Virtue, I didn't have this either when I was growing up mainstream Mormon. This culture/religion is damaging. I'd like to write my story, but I'm having a hard time with this & recovery is 1 step forward 2 steps back. Shanell from the snow till now, you seen to have a much better outlook and have healed from the abuse! I'm glad your mom stood up for you. I hope your mom is doing well. Sending blessings to Andrea, Jessica, Kollene, Val, Eskill, Amanda (whom I watch) & everyone else who's name else's me at this time. Blessings for continued healing & for all to keep moving forward!!
I had no idea that I was in a high demand situation while I was growing up. I was slack jawed when I embraced the truth. My father was an evangelical minister. There was no systematic se*x*al abuse (other than to make it a shameful thing) but the demands, brainwashing, and corporal punishment were intense. My parents were servants of God and I was neglected in favor of the needs of the congregation. We were taught that simply thinking of anything sinful was a sin! There were alter calls. EVERY SUNDAY. Messed with my self esteem. Nothing was or ever could be good enough. I’m grateful for the courage displayed on your channel. ❤
You’re both such strong, wonderful, beautiful women! You’re doing amazing work with others who are struggling and helping more than you could even imagine ❤ keep on keeping on!
I am amazed by your strength. I barely had the strength to listen and had to skip some parts. To live such horrors and survive is remarkable. You are brave and strong and the work you're doing helping others is fantastic.
Shanell is thee best and baddest bish. I related to her so much while watching Escaping Polygamy. Especially when she argued with her mom and then her mom would agree with her ... And then do the exact opposite. 😅😅 It makes me sad that the show is over but after hearing how the show made her relive her trauma i completely understand. You've done your part and exposed this horrible cult. Take your rest and heal
Shanell, you are so well spoken and you have a shining personality! You are also very brave. Wishing you a life of happiness and that all your dreams come true!
I'm glad you're doing well and are living a quieter life. I think the Escaping Polygamy show was important in letting us know the sufferings of people in polygamy today. My great grandparents and some generations before were polygamists. My grandfather was the first to renounce the Mormon faith. I'm glad I've never lived that life. Part of the reason you don't feel like you're a people person, might be that you've been surrounded by people with little permission to have a private thought or existence.
Shanell, you are an amazing person. Thank you for shining a light on polygamy to those of us that never really understood. I believe that we are stronger when we listen and hold space for others. Much love ❤️
You both are strong, brave, and fearless women. Sometimes, all anyone really needs is one other person to believe in them. Thank you all for sharing your experiences with us. In case you haven't been told this lately, "I am proud of you all."
I assumed the modesty standards between mainstream mormons and the order would be similar. I was surprised to see Shanell's wedding dress didn't have sleeves. You two are incredible. Thank you so much for sharing this information.
Hi friends! We were having issues with the video getting restricted when we added the chapter marks to the description. So we thought we would pin them here for anyone who needs them. Thanks for your support!
00:00:00 Intro
00:03:37 Her dad married 14 women....some were siblings
00:08:08 They start grooming them to get married at 2 or 3 yrs old
00:13:14 Explaining "Personal Progress" for young girls
00:14:53 "Casual touching" guidance sheet Shanell got as a young girl
00:20:22 You will be cursed if you don't follow the dating rules
00:22:45 "You may marry one of your siblings here..."
00:26:08 How Shanell "got direction" on who to marry
00:34:18 TW: SA and DV
00:39:19 Is this type of harmful behavior common in The Order?
00:42:10 They were discouraged from calling the Police
00:43:32 TW: DV depictions
00:49:00 Shanell planned to stay with him even after he was arrested
00:49:33 TW: attempted sui**de
00:51:39 TW: r*pe, DV
00:56:43 The Order kept her money when she escaped
00:57:31 Shanell is invited back to church by the prophet as a non-member
01:00:53 Life after The Order- Her entire world crashed down
01:02:55 When Shanell started working on "Escaping Polygamy"
01:05:18 Life after "Escaping Polygamy" filmed
01:11:24 What brings Shanell joy now
01:15:30 Linda, listen
Thanks so Much! I really appreciate it!
Amanda Rae's dad married her mom and her mom's full sister, that's who you're thinking of
This is still a great way to mark the chapters of this interview. 👍
Remenber to leave room for the holy spirit
I worked with a woman who was hemorrhaging which got worse with time. She only consulted her male spiritual guide. She nearly died. All of us at work insisted that she go to the doctor, then eventually to the ER. Her spiritual guide insisted that she not go. We were appalled. She did go to the ER. She was hospitalized.
I love hearing from Shanell, because she has no fecks to give. She doesn't sugar coat it, she doesn't protect anyone, she calls them out in good honest language that is not full of euphemisms meant to make people comfortable. She speaks bluntly and honestly and leaves no room for the BS excuses that Narcissists are so good at using. Im proud of you girl, never let them tell you you need to change your style. YOU are a warrior, and you know it, and we know it. Words are your weapon. Use them.
🙌🙌🙌
I love how raw Shanell is. Her ability to be so open and honest is inspiring. Escaping Polygamy opened my eyes to the brain washing and control of these groups.
@@CultstoConsciousnessoh but you give trigger warnings like it means anything
You’re very right I LOVE it so refreshing… I hate that shit personally. Be real. Be honest. Live your truth and be good to others!
weird place to comment this?@@charlestorruella8591
If a partner has ever strangled you, they will likely kill you. Leave that man. You're in danger.
Yup I’m ex boyfriend did exactly that. I have brain damage from not have oxygen for 4 minutes. He did call for help. I technically died for 4 minutes.
She left him.
My ex put me in a headlock once. It took me 2 years after that to leave. It was the scariest moment of my life
Yes, there is almost an 83% chance. If you're strangled once and you don't leave, you will be killed.
Yup that's why D.A. by strangletation is 6 months to life
Imagine being EXPECTED to marry a family member and then being required to stay pregnant. Freaking horrible!
It’s so messed up. They are raised to breed and keep the cycle going. Their daughters will end up just like them and their sons will either become like their father or kicked out to the streets at a young age. And the inbreeding they force upon these people by making them marry close family members is horrid. What a sad life.
It s actually very common in many islamic countries
@@Scrotiemcb00gerballs you mean that religion of peace? Lol
@@cappiece3786 yes, the piss religion 🤣
@@cappiece3786Exactly
I hate to hear someone that gets abused, have to comfort the abuser because they feel sooooo bad about what they done. That is the biggest bunch of garbage. Its nothing but a manipulative way to get past the situation.
It's disgusting!!!!
I can relate
Its common and its even what people like the Pearls teach that children should do, hug their parents and tell them they love them after their parents beat them for hours
How is Shanell so smart and open after being raised and abused by the Kingstons?? She and her sisters and cousins are such bright lights for overt and covert misogyny. ❤️
Their mom. If you watch the show you can see.
I left mainstream Mormonism 30 years ago. I recently found my personal progress book AND the little cheap bracelet where you collected the colored stones for each achievement you got signed off on. There was also a book called Becoming a Young Woman. Oh man.. I couldn’t even make myself open them. I threw them away.
I’m so glad I’ve run across your podcast. I honestly didn’t know I was even in a cult till a couple weeks ago when I found you. My eyes are wide open and I’m so thankful I’m stubborn and felt the wrong doings in my gut and had the strength to say no and walk away.
Keep doing what you are doing! ❤
Watch “The Godmakers“ 1 & 2
All religions are cults
@@kirsten1339 I was born in the 90s and also heard the chewed gum, plucked flower, in addition to "licked cupcake" and "lollipop that fell in the dirt" and the more obscure "you have 2 keys to a treasure chest and if you don't protect your key because you gave it away to so many boys, then you can never open the 'real treasure' with your husband later, even if he saved his key for you; you've thrown away the treasure altogether". Also remember reading... "What do kisses mean when handed out like pretzels and robbed of sacredness?” (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, 281). and reading a general authority talking about kissing a spouse for the first time over the altar. Have seen other former Mormons describing lessons including 'icing licked off of a cake', 'peanut butter licked off of a sandwich', 'a board with multiple nails hammered in and leaving it full of holes'... Lovely lessons for the abuse survivor to have to hear, in particular -- and I've met a disturbing number of women who confessed they were abused as girls by their own fathers in this religion.
The modus operandi of the LDS church is gaslighting...Because the truth of the religion and their history would make any reasonable person turn away with disgust. They have to lie to maintain membership, and for PR. As per Gordon Hinckley, "I don't know that we teach that; I don't know that we emphasise it" etc... Such dishonesty. It's definitely valuable to look at the older manuals. I remember seeing a pamphlet (For the Strength of Youth, probably?) from an earlier generation talking about how women shouldn't go out with their hair in curlers, and how they should wear tasteful makeup, but not too much, or something. (Just looked it up, '1965 For the Strength of Youth', a site called scribd has a pdf of it.) Also, if you search "Exploring “For the Strength of Youth” from 1990-2022" there's someone who compared the different pamphlets during that time, just found their page by that title.
People who remain in the LDS church have a powerful mental block preventing them from facing the issues with the religion; it's too frightening to have the belief system that most of them were born into thrown into question. 'Ignorance is bliss' for some people.
What I'm about to say is a self-evident statement, men inside religious cults don't want sassy and rebellious woman because it interferes with the template of men being in control of women 24/7.
Us dudes outside of religious cults love rebellious and Sassy women. Such women are so much fun and keep us on our toes in the early dating phases, and keep us leveled and humble in our later dating phases.
Stay sassy and rebellious.
😎👍
It could just be a me thing, but I find being called "sassy and rebellious" to be a compliment 😉🤷♀️
@@carpenter28085 and as it should. Because it is. Except in a religious/ cult setting. Then you are expected to be subservient and stoically proper. which develops and cranks out boring women who lack spontaneity, creativity and just are not fun. To those types of Institutions sassy and rebellious are not what they're looking for.
'Sassy and rebellious' ? Do you just mean woman, who ARE your equal share their opinions and demonstrate their intelligence?
@@triarb5790
Pretty sure that he's the wrong dude to attack. 🤷♂️
Shanell standing up to Daniel Kingston the infamous bully is inspiring to hear. Truly you are a warrior.
I actually learned so much about the order by watching Escaping Polygamy. It was an eye opener. Wish it was still on. The people trapped in this order need so much help.
I know. When I first came across it a few years ago I was gobsmacked. I know many people are still helping the people without the cameras but it was amazing seeing them get released from that horrible life. The stories didn’t always end up with a perfect happy ending but I’m glad they were able to be saved.
They need help to escape. Especially the girls.
Secrets of polygamy is a new show that’s good as well
I miss it too. I love that Matt from Escapying Polygamy is now on the new show Secrets of Polygamy.
It will never cease to amaze me how intelligent and truly tenacious all the people who find their way out of these groups/cults/high demand religions are. Particularly women who may have less access to the outside world and less control. They educate themselves so much and learn so much about the outside world in such a short amount of time, and take such a gamble on it when they leave. Truly incredible people.
I agree!
Shanell, you gave THE BEST Linda Listen moment. "Search for the truth if it doesn't seem very clear" is a statement I will repeat and share with others.
I just binged the whole Escaping Polygamy series over the weekend... Like whoa the rabbit hole of crazy that is The Order... So glad Shanelle and what family they got out are out ❤
I loved that show. But it got reallllllly complicated on a legal level, and there are rumors that production was pushing their own ideas. And that was BEFORE Utah legalized polygamy. I'd love to see it come back, maybe with a Civil Rights Lawyer on the team.
Yeah, I've watched it multiple times over the years because it was so compelling, but idk about the production thing mentioned.
I spotted Val in the episode when they were packing up their Mom, and Daniel showed up.
The Kingstons!
Secrets of polygamy is a new show, mainly focused on the order. There is some flds stuff as well.
Im 65 and ive spent almost my whole life having no clue about all these cults. Its truly scary. This seems to be a serious problem.
It's a very serious problem for many people, being a very small proportion of people
Polygamy causes genetic bottlenecks because of how little diversity there is. Utah is apparently the top place in the world for uncovering genetic disorders - polygamy, prior isolation, people arriving and not leaving, good records.
Ive suggested to Amanda (Shanell's cousin) that if they're looking for a silver lining, they might be really useful to medical science, coming from such a small, traceable gene pool.
links to this? there are much less genetically diverse isolated cultures than Utah on this planet...
@@OntarioBearHunterI could believe this just because of their record keeping. A lot of isolated communities don't have that
Also the Amish, for pretty much the same reason as polygamists.
@@HitomiKitageThe Amish Is Actually The Culture She was Brought Up In, if you go watch Escaping Polygamy And, If you do your own research, The Order - Does Come From The Amish Background, Once you go checking the facts on your history, look at their clothing, that alone tells you it’s part of the same religious cult!
I just love Shanell! She’s such a strong, determined, kind, sweet person! She’s exactly the type of person I would want to be friends with IRL!
Shanell's "Linda, listen:" gave me chills! Thanks to you both for talk about all this and showing us how strong you are.
Shanell is obviously a very strong, intelligent, self-aware and capable young woman. What a wonderful example she sets for other women who find themselves in situations like this. Shelise, thank you for mentioning boundaries. That is so true, especially in a society where "everything" is out there for all the world to see and hear. Boundaries are more important than ever! Best to both of you! 🥰
Gotta love someone with a strong enough constitution to be able to say wait a minute I'm not that girl 😊
Thank you for speaking so candidly about your trauma, I’ve been out of a very small doomsday cult for about two years now, the first year I spent in as much isolation from people as possible to avoid talking about it. This year I’ve been able to hold a steady job as a line cook and I’m doing much better, but none of my peers can really understand my experience. It’s a very lonely feeling, but I’m also glad they can’t relate to the trauma. It’s a difficult experience to convey if you haven’t experienced it, but you shouldn’t have to. Thank you for spreading empathy towards ex-members
I rarely get such a good feeling from people as I get from Shanell. She appears to be such an amazing person! She's strong, smart, genuine, caring and simply a joy to listen to.
As a Scandinavian, the fact that these cults are even allowed to exist in the US is absolutely mind blowing to me.
Scandinavia is one of the most secular/non-religious places in the world, and even just “normal” religion is weird to a lot of people here. I just can’t fathom that there are so many places in the US were there are countless polygamous misogynistic cults and that they are just… allowed to do this to kids and adults.
it's probably due in some part to the sheer number of people who left the UK (or were kicked out) because of their religious beliefs...and left unchecked it sprouted all kinds of nasty abusive cults
Agreed. 👍
Land of the free 💀
Freedom is a scary thing , deal with it.
@@adamguy33 no offense, but these cults being allowed to restrict education and physical autonomy and theologically imprison people seems like the _opposite_ of freedom lol
I love shanell and her cousins amd siblings that have left and have shared their stories. Amanda Rae, Jessica, Andrea, Val, Eskel, Priscilla, Shanell, Alison, Michelle, and anyone im forgetting....you are all such amazing people with resilience and strength and should all be so proud. Thanks for sharing your trauma and lives and most importantly, yourselves with us. I hope life continues to bless you all with joy and happiness and all the wonderful things you deserve!!!💜💜💜
Thank you!
@@Shanzy745 There are a lot of us out here pulling for you, and everyone else trapped in an abusive scenario. How are things working down there since decriminalization? Is CPS being more active?
You said it better than I could. I second this.
@@Exiled.New.Yorker If they are, I can't tell. But for protection of the children, CPS would keep the cases private.
Congratulations to her for escaping the Family Wreath.
best description of the Kingston Clan ever.
I've heard "bush" but never "wreath". Good description.
@@bendyrland7213 Where I lived they were called family telephone poles. But we only had cousin marriages happening sometimes so it looks less tangled.
@@andrewinnkeeper1763 *wreath* as in the round evergreen arrangement you hang up around Christmas
@@andrewinnkeeper1763Oh, I thought you misread "wreath" as "wealth" in the original comment. Out of curiosity, would you care to elaborate on why you brought up family wealth in a thread about family trees with so many entwining branches they might as well be a circle, aka wreath? (Not trying to be antagonistic, just interested in your thoughts!)
Oh personal progress 😂 I remember arguing with my young women’s leader about my divine nature project. I arranged some cute french horn quartets of hymns then recorded them and made videos of the recordings and she said it didn’t count and I said something along the lines of “my divine nature is as a French horn player, not a housewife” 😂
I grew up Evangelical Christian and went to a Christian school. Our dancing separation phrase was "leave room for Jesus." 😂
I heard that when slow dancing, they would put a Bible between the couple and say make room for the Bible
In this case, Mormons have never been considered evangelicals or Protestants by modern theology. have always been a sect founded on totally distorted views of the gospel.
@@Jaspe_C Uh, I never said they were the same thing.
We were told this in catholic achool
It's hard for those of us who were not raised in a cult environment to understand just how strong, powerful and remarkable women like Shannell are - there was nothing in her life to prepare her for leaving, and she had to create an entirely new life in an unfamiliar environment after she left. This channel is a gift to all of us; thank you for giving these amazing warriors a platform, and allowing us all to get to know them. And thank you, Shannell, for your grace and generosity in sharing your story with us all.
I'm so happy Shanell decided to share her experience on your channel! I am from Salt Lake City, Utah as well. I loved watching Escaping polygamy!
💢My friend (who also loved the show) recognized Shanell at a Walmart but did not approach because she realizes that she is just living life and it was not appropriate being aware of her story to bother her. Parasocial relationships can be scary and unnerving. We understand completely!
🌹If I could tell Shanell one thing it would be that there are people out there who do recognize her but respect her personal space and her privacy.
You are amazing shanell. I just want to also applaud your mom for calling and reporting your ex. She was so brave in that moment and I am glad she helped you. You have had to go thru so much and I am glad you could escape. Thank you for being so open and honest about everything and I hope you can find peace in your life.
Thank you for pointing out that asking "Why don't they just leave?" is problematic. Learning to ask better questions like "How can I help?" or "What do they need?" is going to produce better results. I'm glad Shanel got out. It sounds like a much more peaceful life.
I have a couple empty bedrooms I'd be glad to help someone now my daughter's have moved out.
Love how open and honest you are able to be now, about that marriage experience Shanell❤❤❤ I remember seeing newly bruised arms that back in the order she knew not to tell me what actually happened, cuz I'd get myself into trouble with dealing with her ex 😅
❤️❤️❤️
Valiant unicorn!!!!! ❤❤❤
He deserves a butt kicking still!❤😂
It's time for people not only to help Kingston cult victims, but also to ask why Utah's law enforcement and courts aren't doing more to hold Daniel and his buddies accountable for their crimes.
💴! Same as Scientology. These extreme cult’s pay off law enforcement agencies & politicians. It’s sad, sick, & beyond immoral.
This!!!!
“You can come back whenever you want…”
“But you’re married, and the wife follows the husband”
Sounds like you were welcome back only so long as you were potential marriage material
Right!?
I heard this from a poligamy survival sometime, maybe even from this podcast: women are disempowered, but they are valuable for the cult.
I wonder how they get rid of all of the men you would need to be out of the picture in order to be able to marry ten women to a single man. Are they all leaving on their own or are some of them kicked out against their will?
@@cassif19 the order allows the unmarried men to stay for volunteer slave labor, as they work to earn a wife... And Justify not paying them or not allowing them to get their own money. I've seen loyal members working until the age of 40 never married, and being told its just not their time yet, and god has a #1 choice she may not yet be of marriage age… practically training men for grooming practices, as it’s not uncommon for a 43 year old man to marry a 14-16 year old girl. Some men eventually learn to outsource a girl from other polygamist groups. The smarter good men leave the order to learn they were brainwashed… 😔
@@Valiant.Unicorn This unfortunately makes perfect sense
@@cassif19Wonder the same, there must by many "lost boys".
Something that always gets me emotional about those people is that the didn’t just save themselves, they created another path for their kids too. Her daughters will have a very different life because of the decisions that she made ❤
I’m so glad you left that first husband. Everything he said as he abused you is exactly what every other abusive man or woman says.
Yeah! He even told me it was my fault. That he was treating me that way because of me. Finally, when he'd tell me it was my fault or because of me I started responding, "Yeah. Cause I haven't left you yet." Knowing damn well, he was not going to change for me.
Yeah, according to them I was the abusive one, and so was my sister.
Shanell, I’ve seen different bits of your story on Escaping Polygamy, Amanda’s channel and now here. I want you to know I have an indescribable amount of respect for you. You didn’t deserve anything that happened to you in your life in the order. You and your siblings are amazing and I think that’s part of why you were demonised- you all stood up for yourselves, your mum and your siblings and they didn’t like that they couldn’t control you. The way you stood up for your mum in that awful house, the way you took care of your half sister when there were concerns about her mental state. You, Kolleen and Val are just unreal. I’m so so pleased that you escaped and seemingly (and hopefully) have found happiness and security now. All my love to you and to your siblings xxx
I love Shannell and all the Escaping Polygamy women. They are so strong, and they have changed so many lives.
I am glad that you are in a better place. Abusers are so good at manipulation. Its like they all take classes: "Abuse 101". Across culture, religion, and everything else.
I appreciate when introverts and ambiverts share their stories. You have the right to reserve parts of yourself. Just sharing experiences on media is so personal and courageous.
“If I could fool them, maybe I could fool myself …” When she said this about her abusive ex, it hit me that perhaps this was her mother’s psychology, as well, in her marriage to Daniel. We learn how to relationship from those modeled in front of us.
Shanell is a superhero in my eyes. Her work on Escaping Polygamy was nothing short of heroic!
I left an abusive relationship several years back. When I was watching Leaving Polygamy I recognized so much of the dynamic of my relationship in the ones I was watching. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I have no experience of mormonism or cults, but I have learned so much from all the people telling their stories on this channel. Thank you again for your courage,
Thank you Shanell for taking the time and emotional energy to share your story. Your appearences on Escaping Polygamy and C2C are helping so many people understand the truth of what goes on behind closed doors in these communities, and you have helped so many people escape abusive situations and start new lives. You are such a positive force in the world and I hope you know how much you are appreciated! You are a freaking rockstar. Much love ❣
Thank you!
I knew a woman who lost her arm due to DV and was in the hospital/mental health ward for months afterwards. I don't know exactly what happened (it's not a question that you ask) but she told me that it was the seperation for those several months that actually allowed her to see that he was evil -- not whatever thing he had done to her that had caused her to lose her arm. Abusers are very convincing, and I'm glad she got out.
Stephen Hassan, he created the BITE model, said something similar. He was in the moonies, completely brainwashed, then he was in a major car crash and was being cared for by his sister who wasn't in the cult. Even just those few days away from the cult helped push him out but then his dad actually got him to deprogrammers, watching him say so calmly I threatened to kill my father because I was told the deprogrammers were evil. He's spent the last few decades helping people get out of cults
Being kicked out of this group sounds a whole like what being out of Scientology is like, being shunned, losing friends, exiting, no financial help, etc.
It's a cult thing
I love that she's so forthcoming about all this! With the context, it makes sense that she or another girl would pick their cousin. They're teens and it's who they are around more often. I'm not saying it's right to marry your cousin, but when you're a child and it's all around you, I can see why it happens.
The most important thing I have learned from Cult’s to Consciousness is an understanding of how lucky I was to get out so easily, still retaining the full support of my family. While I never asked anyone to their face, I have certainly been guilty of questioning, “Why don’t they just leave?” as well as, “how can they not see through this?” I continue to gain understanding and compassion from every guest and from your insightful questions, framing and guidance. Thank you.
I appreciated Shanell's candidness but I even more appreciated her conscience section. Hearing what it's like to be on the other side of questions people ask just because they see you on their phone or tv was insightful. Perspective is everything.
My religious trauma definitely isn't as deep, but I could really relate to some parts. Like not seeing real options in the pool you're supposed to marry from, father saying no one would want me because I was too much/too rebellious.
She seems like such a nifty person. I'm glad she's happier now.
This woman has the most stunning eyes!! As a woman, I empathize deeply with her sad story. Sadder still is the reality that there are so many more like her in the LDS who are suffering silently.
I am so happy and proud (though I don't know you) of you for taking that insanely hard step to leave and bring awareness to the world. By letting people know what goes on behind closed doors, you're opening peoples eyes and helping people get out.
I really like Shanell's energy and she's so pretty and brave!
Her eyes are so incredible, mesmerizing
So glad to see Shanell looking healthy. I was so worried about her when she became so thin. I didn't watch this show when it originally aired on TV so I am Unaware if this subject matter was addressed. I apologize to anyone offended, not my Intention, just an observation from the episodes I have seen.
Shanell by far is one of the strongest I have ever seen
I think you both are very strong women. There's no reason to judge you ladies. Keep up the great work and make us understand it better.
Shanell, you're so awesome! I love your innate sense of truth and honesty especially when facing all those bullies. I really feel for you! Your strength and bravery is absolutely inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing.
Shanelle is really brave and lucky to be supported by her mom & her family. I’m glad you can get out of that situation.
SHELISE.... I just freaking found out that this was almost my life. I have always known I have family who has a ton of kids and are very religious, right... they are my moms cousins. I got curious and just did some digging and found out they attended Brigham Young University and are LDS. 🤯 I wish my mom and grandma were still alive for me to ask them more about this side of our family and how this didn't become our reality. I have so many questions, and I feel so Flippin lucky for whatever split happened to prevent my brother and I from living his life. Insane!!!!! 😮
Nice to meet Shanell so glad she turned out clever and wise. Thank you Shelise for interview.
You are very brave for taking the first step in breaking the cycle of abuse. Wishing you health; happiness and a future filled with peace and self-love.
Thank you!
I love Shanell! She has the most amazing eyes! And we all know the eyes are the window to the soul...
I love that Shanell was strong enough to finally leave.. it's got to be the hardest thing to leave everything you know and love.. but your soul knew it wasn't the way to live.. and in turn, you honor yourself and your Source- given spirit.
Thank you for sharing your story and continuing to share the truth of the Order. Many blessings to you both!
I've been married for over fifty years to a narcissist and people have asked 'why don't you just leave?' It's not always possible. It sure isn't an easy thing to do!! I applaud you ladies for having left.
Honestly your comment sounds like a pretty good lie ..you were supposed to ended that relationship a very very long time ago ..please make no excuses
I understand. Sending support your way
I totally understand. 😢
@@robertdivany1627you are not living her life. People who make comments like yours don't realise the whys or why nots in others lives
I'm so glad Shanell got away from her cous-band, and The Order. Her strength to move forward and help others leave, is phenomenal. It is a huge sacrifice to be in the public eye, and to do that in order to help others, is so generous, and kind!The show was more than 'public entertainment', it was healing and helpful for many.
Thank you for sharing Shanell, what a story! 😮💨😳 I am so glad you got out and seem to be doing very well now! ❤
No apologies needed. EVER! For what you endured . Setting healthy boundaries is necessary to heal! ❤❤❤
It's so sad their group condones abuse and rape within a marriage. Those things are NEVER ok.
Shannelle, set your boundaries, and live your life on your own terms. God bless you ladies.
Shanell, Thank you so much for your bravery. You a beautiful exsample of, " The Truth shall set you Free ". It's help more people than you'll ever know. You've done you part. Please Enjoy your girls, hubby and free life!
Thank you so much Shanell for being so vulnerable and sharing your story. You are so brave and such an inspiration.
Shanell I won't tell that I can even pretend to understand what you've gone through. I think you are incredibly brave in sharing your story. You relayed so much information that I didn't realize what goes on in these groups. So thank you so much.
Sadly this is still such an important conversation. I experienced very similar marital abuse to Shanell, in my case I now realise through watching this channel, my upbringing in a cult made me the ideal victim. I wish I had known when I was younger, about boundaries and what to look out for. Thank you both for speaking about this and Shanell well done for being so brave and getting out while you were young. Yes there are repercussions and I totally understand the desire to stay at home in safety! Wishing you peace going forward and happiness raising your family❤
What a strong , brave ,articulate , beautiful girl . Great job becoming physically free and free thinking.❤
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. It is so brave to be so vulnerable. Your kids are very fortunate that you are strong and will make sure they can skip this horrible and unfair experience. ❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much for your willingness to revisit your traumas in order to help so many others. Sending thoughts and prayers that all of your wounds are healed and that you truly experience happiness and joy in your lives! Brave women rock! 🙏💗
Shannell, you are an amazing graceful human being and I hope you continue to find the healing you more than deserve. You are a wonderful mother and it's so evident how much you love your children and your animals and I'm so thankful that the Order couldn't break your warrior spirit. Please remember to always relax and take time to rest your spirit when you need it. ❤❤
Thank you!
I agree. Lovely, insightful young woman. I would be proud to have her as my daughter.
I cannot begin to choose words for how inspiring you all are - I just want to say thank you. I’m trying to recover from ptsd trauma caused by abuse and coercive control in just one very short relationship and a pattern with friends and narcissists my whole life, I see so many similarities in that my strong and curious but loving personality and the fact I argued back made it worse - but you give me strength! But honestly my situation is nothing compared and I just can’t thank you enough for empowering me. Im so sorry these things happened to you and I just wish more people would approach things with an assumption of love rather than judgement xx
Thank you for sharing! Sending you love ❤️
Shenelle you are such a source of strength ❤ I admire you soooo much ❤❤ I'm so sorry for the pain you endured. No one deserves that, I hope you can dismantle this "church" and free your family ❤
As a woman who escaped abuse, I applaud you. It was not easy. I held on thinking it would get better. I never told anyone even my parents hoping it would get better and not wanting to put him in a bad light. Thank God you got out as I did. You are courageous and should be so proud of yourself! ❤️❤️
I'm glad you got out Bonnie. I got out too. It's been 10 years and I still get blamed for him "bear hugging" me. But for some, it never happened. All I know is, I'm happy to be free.
Blessings to you. I hope your life is better now.
Thank you so much for sharing your story so freely here, Shanell. I really appreciated your comments about asking you about your experience - those of us who ask want to just pour so much love down your throat because we just can't imagine how much you've been through and we want to just wipe it away - not realizing it's best to love on the terms of the survivor. We do wish we had magic wands to wipe every tear away, but that is not how it works. As you said in so many words, it's peeling the layers of the onion away. Sometimes there are new things that crop up over time that we didn't realize were still there. It is a never ending process. We all have our own journey with our traumas. I wish you the very best with your girls, your animals, and your plants! I love that you have a place to feel free to love and be loved. Bless you (not in a culty way!) and all good and peaceful things to you as you continue your heroic work with other survivors. To you too, Shelise!
Shelise another wonderful interview ❤ you find a way to let people speak their stories, reinforce that what happened to these people was not ok, and frequently you can find some humor or a silver lining ❤
I imagine you have a lot of anger and sorrow- how do you deal? Yoga? Cardio?
Thank you for all you do for the people trying to get out Shanell. You and your sisters are living your truth and it’s a beautiful thing. Thank you for sharing your life with us. And it’s not rude to tell people that walk up to you on the street and want to get your life story that you are not up to talking about it. You have every right to expect privacy and respect when going about your daily life
Huge courage! I'm in awe of how much strength it must have taken to leave.
I have watched a number of your videos and I just want to say that you are a wonderful interviewer. You ask probing, intelligent questions, yet you are so empathetic towards your guests.
Loved hearing Shanelle speak again. Thanks for a great interview guys 💕
Shantell, so glad you didn’t waste your loving heart on people who only want to use you, much love to you and your family.
Shanell you are a beautiful, strong woman who deserves happiness and peace in your life. Thank you for sharing your story!
Thank you ladies for these two episodes ❤️ Thank you Shanell for wanting to share your story with us, complete strangers ❤ Warm greetings from Belgium ❤
They added Virtue, I didn't have this either when I was growing up mainstream Mormon. This culture/religion is damaging. I'd like to write my story, but I'm having a hard time with this & recovery is 1 step forward 2 steps back.
Shanell from the snow till now, you seen to have a much better outlook and have healed from the abuse! I'm glad your mom stood up for you. I hope your mom is doing well. Sending blessings to Andrea, Jessica, Kollene, Val, Eskill, Amanda (whom I watch) & everyone else who's name else's me at this time. Blessings for continued healing & for all to keep moving forward!!
I had no idea that I was in a high demand situation while I was growing up. I was slack jawed when I embraced the truth. My father was an evangelical minister. There was no systematic se*x*al abuse (other than to make it a shameful thing) but the demands, brainwashing, and corporal punishment were intense. My parents were servants of God and I was neglected in favor of the needs of the congregation. We were taught that simply thinking of anything sinful was a sin! There were alter calls. EVERY SUNDAY. Messed with my self esteem. Nothing was or ever could be good enough. I’m grateful for the courage displayed on your channel. ❤
Sending love! Emotional and psychological abuse is extremely difficult as well. ❤️
You’re both such strong, wonderful, beautiful women! You’re doing amazing work with others who are struggling and helping more than you could even imagine ❤ keep on keeping on!
I am amazed by your strength. I barely had the strength to listen and had to skip some parts. To live such horrors and survive is remarkable. You are brave and strong and the work you're doing helping others is fantastic.
Shanell is thee best and baddest bish. I related to her so much while watching Escaping Polygamy. Especially when she argued with her mom and then her mom would agree with her ... And then do the exact opposite. 😅😅 It makes me sad that the show is over but after hearing how the show made her relive her trauma i completely understand. You've done your part and exposed this horrible cult. Take your rest and heal
"Why dont they just leave?" That hit home. Ive got this question so many times. There are so many reasons why cant or just stuck.
Shanell, you are so well spoken and you have a shining personality! You are also very brave. Wishing you a life of happiness and that all your dreams come true!
Much appreciated! 🥰
You are stronger than you think. You are such a brave woman. Congratulations on getting out and being able to move on. ❤❤❤ Love your strength ❤❤❤
17:45 At our dances we were told to leave enough room (between us) for the holy spirit 😅
I'm glad you're doing well and are living a quieter life. I think the Escaping Polygamy show was important in letting us know the sufferings of people in polygamy today. My great grandparents and some generations before were polygamists. My grandfather was the first to renounce the Mormon faith. I'm glad I've never lived that life. Part of the reason you don't feel like you're a people person, might be that you've been surrounded by people with little permission to have a private thought or existence.
Animals, gardening, and just being out on nature is so helpful ❤
Shanell, you are an amazing person. Thank you for shining a light on polygamy to those of us that never really understood. I believe that we are stronger when we listen and hold space for others. Much love ❤️
You both are strong, brave, and fearless women. Sometimes, all anyone really needs is one other person to believe in them. Thank you all for sharing your experiences with us. In case you haven't been told this lately, "I am proud of you all."
❤️🙏
I assumed the modesty standards between mainstream mormons and the order would be similar. I was surprised to see Shanell's wedding dress didn't have sleeves. You two are incredible. Thank you so much for sharing this information.