Thank you. This story was told with feeling from the heart. It was so gratifying to hear that an older sister could not help you, but you could help your older sister. Life is what we make it.
People are complicated. Relationships are complicated. Life can be complicated. My Mum was difficult, my Dad selfish and I had plenty of moments when I dreamed of my birth parents searching me out and finding my dream family. I never got to meet my birth mother but briefly met her daughter and I too came to realize that although it was challenging and complicated at times... I was much better off and I’m forever grateful.
I'm glad you found your family. My father, due to alcoholism, left. My mother hated me. I found my father and brother. I had that same feeling of loneliness
Being the mother of an adopted child your story touched me so much. My son went through adopted syndrome for about 6 years. Until I finally figured out what it was that was driving him so much. We are absolutely wonderful he and I now. And in my eyes hes no different than any other child I have. My heart breaks for your journey. But what a testimony.
Brady, your mom is a gem and is a rock. She was a friend of mine growing up in Lancaster. The most interesting thing about her is that none of us ever knew of these challenges in her life. I always admired her and the older I get, the more I admire her. You’re a lucky young man to have such a wonderful mother. I wish I could just reach out and just give her a huge hug and tell her I love her for being so strong.
What a lovely lady. Thank you for telling your story honey. Now you have all these people who have listened to you and love you. I love you dear child. "Be Still and Know that I am God". ♥️🕊
There is a verse in an old Rolling Stones song that goes “you don’t always get what you want but you get what you need” Thank God you were rescued through your adoption I bless you for sharing your story.🙏
Karen Miller , I’ve known Cindy since we were kids. She is as genuine a person as can be. Cindy has always been sincere and I’ve always admired her. The more I learn of her past, the more endeared I am to her. Cindy would succeed in any situation. I’m grateful to call her friend.
On October 20, 2020 it will the 20th Anniversary of my Adoption Reunion with my Birth-Mother and older Sister on my Biological Maternal side of my families. It’s been a good journey.
I have worked in foster care/adoptions for many years. You are absolutely right that you would not have survived living with your biological family which was a great insight on your part. No family is perfect. Adoption causes such a hole in the soul of many adoptees but deep love also can come from a healthy adoption. As you say, life can be complicated. I am sure this meeting with your mother and sister settled some of your feelings of loss. A wonderful story.
Dear Cindy, you are so brave and I thank God that you realize why, exactly, God put you into an adoptive family: not perfect, as you say, but one you could safely grow up in. Oh, the unfathomable wisdom of God! I am sitting here crying with and for your pain. May God restore you to fullness of joy. Much, much love to you. . .
Awesome vid thanks! I too was adopted in the 50s and found my truth after 15+ years of search/DNA. I found 2 half sis, 7 half bros, 3 full sis, & 4 full bros, (that we know of). 2 women 2 men had 17 kids! This only child is still adjusting! My Bmom didn't want to meet me, and all the Bparents are gone now anyway, but my Nieces and Nephews embrace me as "Aunt" and it's amazing. I pray every adoptee never gives up, and that ALL the states open their records soon.
Wouldn’t it be terrific if all the states opened their sealed records and all those who are looking find the joy they deserve. Blessed be your “Auntie” moments.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It gives those of us who have not found our bio family, hope that some day, no matter what the results, we, too, can find our birth family.
Wow. What a beautiful unveiling of God's love for His child. Your loving heart and compassion for your birth mother and sister are inspirational and so touching. I would have been proud to have a sister like you.
Thank you for sharing. This brought up memories of my childhood. I live in Utah and when I was around 2 1/2 my Mom had a breakdown and I went to stay with my Great Aunt and Uncle. I don't know how long I lived with them, but at the time my little Sister was 3 weeks old and she went to an Aunts house and she was there for over a year. I was so sad at that age. I was told later in life that my Great Aunt didn't want to give me back. She had lost a baby girl at birth and couldn't have any more children, so I was her chance at Motherhood. This all was a hot topic apparently. Dad use to take me with him to go visit and a familiar memory came back to me at one of the visits. I asked my Mom when we got back if I had ever lived there and she said, "Let's not start that again" so I never asked again. I still have so many questions now, but all involved have passed on. I didn't know any of this while they were alive, but I was drawn to my Great Aunt and I didn't know why. When she passed I just knew I had to be there, but I didn't know why. I feel bad for my Great Aunt and sometimes I think they should have left me there, but she did get to experience being a Mother to me, even if it was a short time. Bless you and thank you again for sharing your life experiences.
Cindy God has guided and directed your life. It may not have been perfect but it was and is your life. It made you who you are today. It has made you a fighter, made you strong. Thank you for sharing your story.
@@billwilson5341 i don’t think it’s odd at all. I know how much work he put into drilling through my old films and the editing and the interviews. He did a great job!
@@RangerLadyGillman : I'm happy you responded. I noticed your name this time. I can state that I'm a complete doofus. I did not realize who you are. My apologies. Yes Brady did a great job! I thank you for your patience.
I also adopted children that would not have survived their birth families. The foster system is broken in North America, in many different ways. I know that I would have benefited if our social workers had shared more information regarding the trauma of adoption upon children. I don't know if they were ignorant, or didn't want to scare adoptive parents away. But I do know that I could have understood my children better while they were growing up. Instead, I always did my own research. One of my kids laughs at me and says he was "my project." This is my Canadian experience from decades ago. It was a different time. There was no secrecy or shame about adoption. Indeed, if anyone wondered, they simply concluded that I got around. My children have different skin colors. Now that they are young adults, they get a kick out of people saying: "what, you're siblings?" Robert Hafetz is a great source of information regarding the trauma of adoption. And how the trauma can manifest as your child is growing up. E.g., It's not always just teenage angst.
Thank you for sharing your story.My friends niece sadly smoked something+sent her down the Mental Health route.Am so pleased you met your family.Interesting the point of happiness. Oh same for me,I was lucky not to have stayed with my real mother+her family.
What a great video. My mom was raised by a step mom after her mother left and living in an orphanage for a few years. She had big scares from her childhood. My mom had 7 kids and I’m the youngest. I wish I was older and able to help her get the storms of life. She was very loving and gave her life to her kids with no help for the most part from anyone. She past away in 2010. I think of and miss her everyday.
So why is the evil fucker absent in the lives of millions of children who die each year of malnutrition or water bourne disease , don't see him guiding their footsteps except to their graves , maybe he's just into white American middle class folks !.
Thank you - You tell your story in such a straight forward and honest .manner. Your determination to find your birth family is enviable and so worth it in the end.
Thank you for sharing your story. It really touched me. I too was placed in Gods safety net and I am forever thankful for that. My life would have been so dark had my birth mother kept me. God Bless!
I don't understand. Back then, people didnt go around saying their children were adopted. It was just the way it was. It didnt mean they were embarrassed by them. It was protecting them from kids in school and other adults stares, whispers, exclusion. In the film the adoptive mom looked very happy and loving with her and her brother. I get that she wanted to find her real mom but what did the other womwn do that was so horrible? I must have missed something.
As a child I remember that feeling of loneliness, a separation from those in my family, and I came from a relatively normal upbringing with my biological family. It seems to be the norm for tweens and teens, we go through. However, I feel your adoptive mothers saying it was 'our little Secret', because she felt she was protecting you, and herself because she truly wanted to be your (birth) mother. It never ceases to amaze me how, as children, we internalize the smallest things, blow them up, and carry the baggage around as if it were our identity. When they have nothing to do with our true identity and everything to do with the self deceptions we allowed ourselves to place in our own souls. Believing lies will rob you of life's peace! We are to put away the things of our childhood as adults. If we go back and look at them with adult understanding, instead of a child's, that becomes easier to do. Adoptive parents truly want a loving, bonding relationship with their adoptive children. There is an incredible, deep yearning of love a person has, to bring someone else's child into their home as their own. What a heartbreak if the child doesn't return that love! How many missed moments of care and love are lost when we have a faulty attachment Style!
Wow! What an opinion to have on something you’ve not been through and don’t have the first idea about. Shame on you to judge this woman’s journey. This woman has the right to know where she comes from, you have no idea how hard it is to live with never knowing whose blood runs though your veins. Whether it was nature or nurture that you get your quirks and habits from. To never know whose eyes you have or whose nose you inherited. So screw you and your shitty judgement on this woman. How dare you tell her what she got was just good enough and basically saying that she’s ungrateful for her adoptive family. Shame on you.
@@NativeNYerChicHK What makes you think that she is suggesting that she should not have searched for her bio mom? I did not read that anywhere! Her focus was on her relationship with her adoptive mom, that is it. I think it was good advice also. My only thought was that she was making an assumption about her adoptive mother that may or may not have been true. I have to consider what the woman in the film was saying was fully possible that there was a desire by her adoptive mother not to fully bond with her but with my own experience with both biological children and adopted children I think it is very possible that her suggestion that her "attachment style" could also have been part of the problem. Attachment is a two way street for biological children and it is the same for adopted children. It may not be the case, but then again it might have validity. If it does, the realization might be healing for her. Many parents are not perfect, and some kids get born giving their parents difficulty from the beginning. Some kids score high on the neuroticism scale. I think that the above advice would apply especially in those cases. I have nieces born about the same time into the same family with the same problems. The ones that one would consider the highest on the neuroticism scale are those that are having the most trouble with their parents and in their personal lives. These family members are not perfect but their daughter's views on it vary in the extremes. Also, the ones with kids have become the most understanding towards the parents now. I also find it interesting that my biological daughter is more critical of these relatives than a couple of my adopted boys. They are the ones trying to make family peace. With respect to Divine Providence, which the woman speaks so eloquently about, I am so glad that that affected my adoption. I had thought about adopting one toddler. Instead in a strange twist I ended up adopting 3 older boys, ages 7, 9, and 11 from a foreign orphanage. These are the guys that have no interest in any contact with their bio moms, and only one of the three is willing to do a dna test kit. They simply want no part of the bio moms. They remember them. They were between 3 and 6 when they were removed. I can guarantee you that this is not to make me feel good because one of them still maintains contact with his grandmother. These guys know their ancestry, for the most part their ethnicity, and at times want to be told that some of the "quirks and habits" of their parents do not necessarily have to be theirs too. One of them takes pride in his ethnicity, the oldest. The younger two want to be more generic American. No typical birth parent fantasies growing up. They had the full unadulterated birth parent reality. I am not quite sure how I would have felt if I had a great relationship with a young adopted child and then when they got to the difficult teenage years they thought that our problems were more due to adoption than to coming of age. My boys are wounded because of the abuse and neglect, they never had excessively high standards for me, and I am very thankful that they never were the excessively introspective types and sensitive types, that the person making the comment might be alluding to, suggesting that being overly sensitive or neurotic might have played a role in attachment or lack of it. We get it that many adoptees feel a sense of abandonment, that adoption affects your life, that you are curious about your biological family and your ethnicity, but adoptive parents do not need to be categorically shut up and shamed either. At one time they were generally considered in a favorable light. I am glad that I have bio kids besides the adopted ones and that I adopted older ones and that my motivation was more for a love of kids and big families and a concern that there were kids rotting away in orphanages that might like to be part of the family. I have a lot less pride invested in this and so I can tell you that you are not the only ones with a voice and their are some kids that do appreciate adoption and sometimes adopted kids can benefit from seeing things through their adoptive parents perspective to improve upon their relationships and their self esteem. Also, my advice to adoptive parents. Have an open adoption. I have a strong feeling that your kids will bond with you a lot better if they know their biological family from the beginning and if they are "safe" people let them have occasional contact with your adopted kids. I have a feeling that it will result in a more realistic view of reality for both you and your children. You are going to realize that they want to bond with you, and you need not have excessive fears about their wanting to leave you and be part of their birth families instead. If they are good people you will come to see the positive in their relationship with their birth families.
@@lorimav Vast experiences you’ve written about through what sounds to me like words of a therapist. There is so much more to my story that this mini documentary was not focused on. Years have passed since adoption reunion, 20 this October. My adopted parents had mental health issues, this was not spoken of in the video. I was blessed with an uncommon resilience for a child. Survival was the key element of my life. There was no options at the time for healthy attachments with them. They were honored while alive and healed from after their passings. Therapy was a beautiful gift. I’ll leave you with knowing that much healing has occurred.
I understand!!My so called Adopted mother always introduced me as Adopted but not in a good way!She always said she never wanted me but my Dad did😢heartbreaking..for this lady and many others.
Stella David Seahorse Oracle Cards I understand ....that's why I say adoption is NEVER the same...it's NOT fair to kids...and I saw adoption FAIL at EVERY stop and TURN...
I have two friends who were adopted. After both met their birth mothers, they realized they were better off in their adoptive family. Meeting their biological mothers was not a good experience. They knew after the meeting, they'd been blessed -- being adopted.
It’s a very emotionally complicated script no one gets to write or rehearse in their lifetime. It only gets to be lived in the moment. And it’s very fragile.
Beautiful . I was raised in the Orphanage. 109 kids. I also in my 40s or 50s before I realized that I would not have survived in my real family. I wished I could have been great full when I was younger but the children's home was horrible and with out love. Once I was beaten by 12 because I refused to eat my cottage cheese.
The orphanage I was in also horrible. I think the people that put in to watch over us are not trained or care and are just mean. Thank God the superintendent of the orphanage was kind and good. He had a daughter my age and he would take me home to play with her pretty often. I even was able to take trips with them. I don't know why he choose me out of all the other kids. I felt very fortunate. When my adoptive parents wanted a child it was I he showed me too them. I always felt it was a God thing.
Thank you for sharing your story. My adopted mom is bi-polar schizophrenic and had bought what she thought she wanted to be “normal”. She couldn’t have children but my dad (adopted) had boys from his first marriage. I was the “prize”... she bought me. But as a kid I promised I would never look for my biological family. I don’t remember being “pushed” to not search but in 2018 I broke that promise and could never imagine my story. My birth mother had an affair while her husband was in Korean. My mom has always told me that my birth mom was given a choice, her husband or me and she chose her husband... and my mom would always say that “they were probably no longer together”... how would she “know” this? Because she KNEW my birth parents! They ran in the same circles and my biological father would marry one of my adopted mom’s uncles. I didn’t think I’d ever meet my birth mom... the ironic this is we DID meet. My birth mother and her two older children moved to small time Mississippi and in 1988 I became acquainted with the town as my ex-husband was from that town. While out to eat in this small town where no one but myself and my them boyfriend (now Ex-husband) knew I was adopted one of my ex’s cousins pointed out that our waitress and I could be related we looked so much alike... that was my biological mother!!! I also unbeknownst to me met my half brother who was a part time sheriff in the adjacent town... he came to my in-law’s to pick up a donation and we were visiting. I missed out on meeting both of my biological parents. In 1994 I remember telling my then husband that something felt off that day... I would learn 20+ years later that that’s when my biological mother passed away from complications of having a meningaloma the size of a golf ball from her brain... I have the same “anomaly”... it’s only 4mm tho. My biological father died in 1987 and no one I have found knows why/how he died... and I have been unsuccessful in contacting anyone from that part of my linage. Was also told I was Italian. Nope. Irish, Norse. It explains why I could drink grown men under the table. LOL My mom Will always be my mom. Mental illness included. That doesn’t mean that she’s not stubborn she hasn’t spoken to me in nearly 7 years. But deeply I know that it is the mental illness that has brought us to this impasse. She turned 80 years old just yesterday (February 10, 2020) Does this mean that I forgive her for the emotional, physical, mental abuse… I don’t know because it was my normal.
I wasn’t adopted but grew up with very little contact with my father not know much about my fathers family. I’m now 54 and have found second cousins first cousins aunt and uncle. I even imagined to find cousins that my cousin had been looking for for 30 years
I hope that you feel at ease now. Your older sister and your mom knew that you existed, and they probably prayed to meet you. That may have been the yearning that you had felt to have an older sister, their love was blossoming in your heart and making you want to search for them.
Thank you for sharing your story with us on TH-cam!!! It's very interesting!!! I can understand if this isn't an easy subject for you to discuss!!!!💟💛💙💜
I can understand sooo much!!! I THANK YOU SO MUCH for sharing your story! I can see in you an awesome person, full of joy, intelligence and openness. I feel grateful, cause you gave me a perspective I haven't considered on the situations our Lord has to intervene to make sure the less damage is done. I've had SITUATIONS in my family too. Strong ones just like yours. You made me think of another perspective to understand my own reality. Thank you very much for sharing! God bless you and your whole family!
You are a very special person. I'm sorry that your heart hurt for years but thankful to God that you were finally able to meet your family. God is good.
@Ange H Sorry you feel this way about my emotional journey at the time. This is only a snapshot of time and not the full story of my adoption reunion. Both adoptive parents and birthmother has passed away long ago. Lots of emotional healing has occurred since then 20 years ago.
What a precious lady to deal with this story with love and acceptance by trusting the Lord’s wisdom in taking her out of her birth family for her protection.
Like fuck he does , he leaves millions to starve , die of malnutrition and water bourne disease , he even stands by and watches his own priests rape small children [ mostly boys ] and these are the celibate ones !.
i took in my daughters best friend. her parents were addicts on meth. the daughter stayed with me from 15 and up. now her brother stays with me. he has adhd and is a handfull. we just go day by day. sometimes a person needs the youth as much as the youth needs a home. i took them in because I am the motherly type. i saw a need as well in them. i couldnt stand by and see the kids suffer. i understand your story but people who adopt have a lot of love to give.
Get your DNA out to every test you can, ancestry.com, 23andMe, Family tree dna, my heritage, then upload to GEDmatch. You are very likely to be able to figure out who your biological father is especially if you consult with someone who knows the finer points of this kind of research. I am sure there a groups out their that can guide you. Ancestry.com has a $49 special, 23andMe has a $79, black friday special. If you have not figured out who your father is with either of those two tests you can take your 23andMe data and upload to family tree dna, my heritage, and GED match. Now in days no name on the birth certificate does not at all mean you won't find him. I found out my aunt had a son that none of us knew about.
WOW! Hope you’ve found your safe space! Your adoption secret was to have a special bond between you and your adoptive Mom, sorry you missed it. I’m glad you found your biological Mom but now it makes sense about your mental awareness. How can you compare your two Moms? Sad. GOD Bless you, your bio Mom, Sister, Brother and adoptive parents (for they saved you).
There’s so much more to this story that wasn’t shared on the video. The comparison was relevant, both suffered mental illness. It’s just that one had lots of material possessions and the other had none. Yet the one without had joy and knew how to choose it. The other just could not get past her sorrows.
Thank you. This story was told with feeling from the heart. It was so gratifying to hear that an older sister could not help you, but you could help your older sister. Life is what we make it.
People are complicated. Relationships are complicated. Life can be complicated. My Mum was difficult, my Dad selfish and I had plenty of moments when I dreamed of my birth parents searching me out and finding my dream family. I never got to meet my birth mother but briefly met her daughter and I too came to realize that although it was challenging and complicated at times... I was much better off and I’m forever grateful.
I'm glad you found your family. My father, due to alcoholism, left. My mother hated me. I found my father and brother. I had that same feeling of loneliness
As you say not an easy subject to talk about. Thank you for sharing.
Being the mother of an adopted child your story touched me so much. My son went through adopted syndrome for about 6 years. Until I finally figured out what it was that was driving him so much. We are absolutely wonderful he and I now. And in my eyes hes no different than any other child I have.
My heart breaks for your journey. But what a testimony.
What is adoption syndrome?
Brady, your mom is a gem and is a rock. She was a friend of mine growing up in Lancaster. The most interesting thing about her is that none of us ever knew of these challenges in her life. I always admired her and the older I get, the more I admire her. You’re a lucky young man to have such a wonderful mother. I wish I could just reach out and just give her a huge hug and tell her I love her for being so strong.
Thank you Ralph.
@@RangerLadyGillman You're welcome Cindy
What a lovely lady. Thank you for telling your story honey. Now you have all these people who have listened to you and love you. I love you dear child. "Be Still and Know that I am God". ♥️🕊
Oh my! Thanks you for your love and appreciation of my story. Such kind words.
There is a verse in an old Rolling Stones song that goes “you don’t always get what you want but you get what you need” Thank God you were rescued through your adoption I bless you for sharing your story.🙏
Yep, life is real and sometimes it’s real hard. And He has shown me how to show up for it! Thanks for the kind words.
This lady is wise, gracious and beautiful both on the inside and on outside.
Karen Miller , I’ve known Cindy since we were kids. She is as genuine a person as can be. Cindy has always been sincere and I’ve always admired her. The more I learn of her past, the more endeared I am to her. Cindy would succeed in any situation. I’m grateful to call her friend.
What a wonderful lady. Her story is so sad. Thanks for sharing
On October 20, 2020 it will the 20th Anniversary of my Adoption Reunion with my Birth-Mother and older Sister on my Biological Maternal side of my families. It’s been a good journey.
What a lovely story. Now you are sharing unconditional love with your mother and sister; what could be more perfect?
What an incredible human being this lady is.
I have worked in foster care/adoptions for many years. You are absolutely right that you would not have survived living with your biological family which was a great insight on your part. No family is perfect. Adoption causes such a hole in the soul of many adoptees but deep love also can come from a healthy adoption. As you say, life can be complicated. I am sure this meeting with your mother and sister settled some of your feelings of loss. A wonderful story.
Dear Cindy, you are so brave and I thank God that you realize why, exactly, God put you into an adoptive family: not perfect, as you say, but one you could safely grow up in. Oh, the unfathomable wisdom of God! I am sitting here crying with and for your pain. May God restore you to fullness of joy. Much, much love to you. . .
Thank you for your very kind words and love. And He has restored me and strengthened me beyond anything I ever asked for.
What an awesome woman you are. Your attitude is so beautiful. So many would be resentful and full of blame, but you're full of compassion and thanks.
Awesome vid thanks! I too was adopted in the 50s and found my truth after 15+ years of search/DNA. I found 2 half sis, 7 half bros, 3 full sis, & 4 full bros, (that we know of). 2 women 2 men had 17 kids! This only child is still adjusting! My Bmom didn't want to meet me, and all the Bparents are gone now anyway, but my Nieces and Nephews embrace me as "Aunt" and it's amazing. I pray every adoptee never gives up, and that ALL the states open their records soon.
Wouldn’t it be terrific if all the states opened their sealed records and all those who are looking find the joy they deserve. Blessed be your “Auntie” moments.
Thank you for your beautiful story and testament. God Bless you!
What a moving story. So much in so few words. Very well told. You are a beautiful person.
Wow! What a journey! Thank you for sharing your extraordinary story. Bless you and all of your family.
Thank you for sharing your story!
Beautiful story, and your positive response to all of it is inspirational. God is so good 🙏 ❤️
Excellent documentary. Thanks for sharing.
Brady Gillman did an amazing and excellent job of creating this piece.
Wow, I'm touched by your understanding of your adoption. God bless you.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It gives those of us who have not found our bio family, hope that some day, no matter what the results, we, too, can find our birth family.
Wow. What a beautiful unveiling of God's love for His child. Your loving heart and compassion for your birth mother and sister are inspirational and so touching. I would have been proud to have a sister like you.
Thank you! Such kind words.
Thank you for sharing. This brought up memories of my childhood. I live in Utah and when I was around 2 1/2 my Mom had a breakdown and I went to stay with my Great Aunt and Uncle. I don't know how long I lived with them, but at the time my little Sister was 3 weeks old and she went to an Aunts house and she was there for over a year. I was so sad at that age. I was told later in life that my Great Aunt didn't want to give me back. She had lost a baby girl at birth and couldn't have any more children, so I was her chance at Motherhood. This all was a hot topic apparently. Dad use to take me with him to go visit and a familiar memory came back to me at one of the visits. I asked my Mom when we got back if I had ever lived there and she said, "Let's not start that again" so I never asked again. I still have so many questions now, but all involved have passed on. I didn't know any of this while they were alive, but I was drawn to my Great Aunt and I didn't know why. When she passed I just knew I had to be there, but I didn't know why. I feel bad for my Great Aunt and sometimes I think they should have left me there, but she did get to experience being a Mother to me, even if it was a short time.
Bless you and thank you again for sharing your life experiences.
You have a powerful story as well. I hope you share your learning experiences with those that need to learn from you. God bless you.
great message in this story. Thank you for what you shared.
Thank you for sharing your incredible story!
Cindy God has guided and directed your life. It may not have been perfect but it was and is your life. It made you who you are today. It has made you a fighter, made you strong. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you for courage to share and thanks to God for saving this lady so she can get a witness for Him.
A most heartfelt story. Thank you for sharing. God be with you.
This is a tear jerker. I am so happy she learned the truth.
This is an excellent story. THANK YOU, Cindy, for sharing your story and thank you to those that took the time to make the video.
My son, Brady, did a great job!
@@RangerLadyGillman : What an odd, vague comment.
@@billwilson5341 i don’t think it’s odd at all. I know how much work he put into drilling through my old films and the editing and the interviews. He did a great job!
@@RangerLadyGillman : I'm happy you responded. I noticed your name this time. I can state that I'm a complete doofus. I did not realize who you are. My apologies. Yes Brady did a great job! I thank you for your patience.
Blessings to all of y'all!!!! This made my heart skip a beat...forward.... it started beating faster! Lovely!!!
Thank you for sharing your poignant life story Cindy. I love how you had your "AHA" moment and knowing grace from that.
Thank you for sharing your love. My AHA moment was huge in my life. And His grace has opened my heart.
Wow! What an amazing story, God is good xxxx God bless y and ur family xxx sending love and light to u all xxx
Successful life boils down to determination and appreciation.
I also adopted children that would not have survived their birth families. The foster system is broken in North America, in many different ways. I know that I would have benefited if our social workers had shared more information regarding the trauma of adoption upon children. I don't know if they were ignorant, or didn't want to scare adoptive parents away. But I do know that I could have understood my children better while they were growing up. Instead, I always did my own research. One of my kids laughs at me and says he was "my project."
This is my Canadian experience from decades ago. It was a different time. There was no secrecy or shame about adoption. Indeed, if anyone wondered, they simply concluded that I got around. My children have different skin colors. Now that they are young adults, they get a kick out of people saying: "what, you're siblings?" Robert Hafetz is a great source of information regarding the trauma of adoption. And how the trauma can manifest as your child is growing up. E.g., It's not always just teenage angst.
What an amazing story. Glad to hear she's fine.
What a really heart felt story! Your amazing!
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story
I love your story!
Thank you so much for sharing!
Blessings
Thank you for sharing your story.My friends niece sadly smoked something+sent her down the Mental Health route.Am so pleased you met your family.Interesting the point of happiness. Oh same for me,I was lucky not to have stayed with my real mother+her family.
What a great video. My mom was raised by a step mom after her mother left and living in an orphanage for a few years. She had big scares from her childhood. My mom had 7 kids and I’m the youngest. I wish I was older and able to help her get the storms of life. She was very loving and gave her life to her kids with no help for the most part from anyone. She past away in 2010. I think of and miss her everyday.
Praise the Lord! Beautiful! God bless you dear and your families!
I know this is older, but thank you for sharing this story of adoption and faith. I am an adoptive mother and this blessed me
Thank you for sharing.... may God bless you all!🙏🏽🙌🏽
This blows me away. Girl good story an amazing additude 😥😍
What a story!! Thank you for sharing. You really need to write a book for others.
I do need to write this book...but so daunting it seems. Thanks for the nudge.
@@RangerLadyGillman I've written a book and believe me it is therapeutic. I needed that nudge too and it worked 😄
"He lovingly guards evry footstep,He tenderly cares for me...His strong arms of love are about me my Saviour and Shepherd is He.."
bonnie berry I love this! I'm going to Whatsapp it.
i HOPE SHE (CINDY) IS A MOTHER. GOD BLESS HER.
So why is the evil fucker absent in the lives of millions of children who die each year of malnutrition or water bourne disease , don't see him guiding their footsteps except to their graves , maybe he's just into white American middle class folks !.
That was so beautiful to read this morning. Thank you! God Bless!
@@robertcarey8294 as summed up in the song 'Thank-you god' by Tim Minchin.
Awesome story of Gods redeeming love.......thank you for sharing it.
Well done, Brady! What a moving film.
bless your heart . after all the pain you can still see the good plan of God.
@@rosariosalazar3938 God is good isn’t He.
Brady has a natural talent in story development and built this video out a very organic experience in our family. It’s a beautiful piece.💚
Thank you - You tell your story in such a straight forward and honest .manner.
Your determination to find your birth family is enviable and so worth it in the end.
Thank you for sharing your story.
It really touched me.
I too was placed in Gods safety net and I am forever thankful for that.
My life would have been so dark had my birth mother kept me.
God Bless!
Thank you for your kind words.
Wow, what a wonderful woman...her journey is such a testament to forgiveness and acceptance.
I don't understand. Back then, people didnt go around saying their children were adopted. It was just the way it was. It didnt mean they were embarrassed by them. It was protecting them from kids in school and other adults stares, whispers, exclusion. In the film the adoptive mom looked very happy and loving with her and her brother. I get that she wanted to find her real mom but what did the other womwn do that was so horrible? I must have missed something.
This is not the full story.... a snapshot in time piece.
As a child I remember that feeling of loneliness, a separation from those in my family, and I came from a relatively normal upbringing with my biological family. It seems to be the norm for tweens and teens, we go through. However, I feel your adoptive mothers saying it was 'our little Secret', because she felt she was protecting you, and herself because she truly wanted to be your (birth) mother. It never ceases to amaze me how, as children, we internalize the smallest things, blow them up, and carry the baggage around as if it were our identity. When they have nothing to do with our true identity and everything to do with the self deceptions we allowed ourselves to place in our own souls. Believing lies will rob you of life's peace! We are to put away the things of our childhood as adults. If we go back and look at them with adult understanding, instead of a child's, that becomes easier to do. Adoptive parents truly want a loving, bonding relationship with their adoptive children. There is an incredible, deep yearning of love a person has, to bring someone else's child into their home as their own. What a heartbreak if the child doesn't return that love! How many missed moments of care and love are lost when we have a faulty attachment Style!
Or it's just not about the adult. It's about that child and validation of THEM having real feelings and intuition.
Wow! What an opinion to have on something you’ve not been through and don’t have the first idea about. Shame on you to judge this woman’s journey. This woman has the right to know where she comes from, you have no idea how hard it is to live with never knowing whose blood runs though your veins. Whether it was nature or nurture that you get your quirks and habits from. To never know whose eyes you have or whose nose you inherited. So screw you and your shitty judgement on this woman. How dare you tell her what she got was just good enough and basically saying that she’s ungrateful for her adoptive family. Shame on you.
@@NativeNYerChicHK What makes you think that she is suggesting that she should not have searched for her bio mom? I did not read that anywhere! Her focus was on her relationship with her adoptive mom, that is it. I think it was good advice also. My only thought was that she was making an assumption about her adoptive mother that may or may not have been true. I have to consider what the woman in the film was saying was fully possible that there was a desire by her adoptive mother not to fully bond with her but with my own experience with both biological children and adopted children I think it is very possible that her suggestion that her "attachment style" could also have been part of the problem. Attachment is a two way street for biological children and it is the same for adopted children. It may not be the case, but then again it might have validity. If it does, the realization might be healing for her. Many parents are not perfect, and some kids get born giving their parents difficulty from the beginning. Some kids score high on the neuroticism scale. I think that the above advice would apply especially in those cases. I have nieces born about the same time into the same family with the same problems. The ones that one would consider the highest on the neuroticism scale are those that are having the most trouble with their parents and in their personal lives. These family members are not perfect but their daughter's views on it vary in the extremes. Also, the ones with kids have become the most understanding towards the parents now. I also find it interesting that my biological daughter is more critical of these relatives than a couple of my adopted boys. They are the ones trying to make family peace.
With respect to Divine Providence, which the woman speaks so eloquently about, I am so glad that that affected my adoption. I had thought about adopting one toddler. Instead in a strange twist I ended up adopting 3 older boys, ages 7, 9, and 11 from a foreign orphanage. These are the guys that have no interest in any contact with their bio moms, and only one of the three is willing to do a dna test kit. They simply want no part of the bio moms. They remember them. They were between 3 and 6 when they were removed. I can guarantee you that this is not to make me feel good because one of them still maintains contact with his grandmother. These guys know their ancestry, for the most part their ethnicity, and at times want to be told that some of the "quirks and habits" of their parents do not necessarily have to be theirs too. One of them takes pride in his ethnicity, the oldest. The younger two want to be more generic American. No typical birth parent fantasies growing up. They had the full unadulterated birth parent reality. I am not quite sure how I would have felt if I had a great relationship with a young adopted child and then when they got to the difficult teenage years they thought that our problems were more due to adoption than to coming of age. My boys are wounded because of the abuse and neglect, they never had excessively high standards for me, and I am very thankful that they never were the excessively introspective types and sensitive types, that the person making the comment might be alluding to, suggesting that being overly sensitive or neurotic might have played a role in attachment or lack of it.
We get it that many adoptees feel a sense of abandonment, that adoption affects your life, that you are curious about your biological family and your ethnicity, but adoptive parents do not need to be categorically shut up and shamed either. At one time they were generally considered in a favorable light. I am glad that I have bio kids besides the adopted ones and that I adopted older ones and that my motivation was more for a love of kids and big families and a concern that there were kids rotting away in orphanages that might like to be part of the family. I have a lot less pride invested in this and so I can tell you that you are not the only ones with a voice and their are some kids that do appreciate adoption and sometimes adopted kids can benefit from seeing things through their adoptive parents perspective to improve upon their relationships and their self esteem. Also, my advice to adoptive parents. Have an open adoption. I have a strong feeling that your kids will bond with you a lot better if they know their biological family from the beginning and if they are "safe" people let them have occasional contact with your adopted kids. I have a feeling that it will result in a more realistic view of reality for both you and your children. You are going to realize that they want to bond with you, and you need not have excessive fears about their wanting to leave you and be part of their birth families instead. If they are good people you will come to see the positive in their relationship with their birth families.
@@NativeNYerChicHK And who is doing the judging here?
@@lorimav Vast experiences you’ve written about through what sounds to me like words of a therapist. There is so much more to my story that this mini documentary was not focused on. Years have passed since adoption reunion, 20 this October. My adopted parents had mental health issues, this was not spoken of in the video. I was blessed with an uncommon resilience for a child. Survival was the key element of my life. There was no options at the time for healthy attachments with them. They were honored while alive and healed from after their passings. Therapy was a beautiful gift. I’ll leave you with knowing that much healing has occurred.
I understand!!My so called Adopted mother always introduced me as Adopted but not in a good way!She always said she never wanted me but my Dad did😢heartbreaking..for this lady and many others.
Horrible and heartbreaking. Not all people were meant to have children. Biological, Foster, or Adoptive.
Stella David Seahorse Oracle Cards I understand ....that's why I say adoption is NEVER the same...it's NOT fair to kids...and I saw adoption FAIL at EVERY stop and TURN...
Although it was heartbreaking and difficult at times I have been strengthened because of my journey. I hope for you some of the same blessings.
I have two friends who were adopted. After both met their birth mothers, they realized they were better off in their adoptive family. Meeting their biological mothers was not a good experience. They knew after the meeting, they'd been blessed -- being adopted.
Me too.
It’s a very emotionally complicated script no one gets to write or rehearse in their lifetime. It only gets to be lived in the moment. And it’s very fragile.
Amazingly beautiful story
I loved this lady’s story❤️
Beautiful story of growth! We all have a past that somehow, determines our future.
Beautiful . I was raised in the Orphanage. 109 kids. I also in my 40s or 50s before I realized that I would not have survived in my real family. I wished I could have been great full when I was younger but the children's home was horrible and with out love. Once I was beaten by 12 because I refused to eat my cottage cheese.
Nancy Howard I am so sorry that that happened to you, you should have NOT been beaten....by anyone for any reason...may God keep you!!!!
The orphanage I was in also horrible. I think the people that put in to watch over us are not trained or care and are just mean. Thank God the superintendent of the orphanage was kind and good. He had a daughter my age and he would take me home to play with her pretty often. I even was able to take trips with them. I don't know why he choose me out of all the other kids. I felt very fortunate. When my adoptive parents wanted a child it was I he showed me too them. I always felt it was a God thing.
What a great film! Thank you.
Whom ever did your close captioning needs to go back to court reporting school... Amazing touching story
It is generated by TH-cam automatically. It is turned off now. Thank you for your kind words.
I love that adoption is « God’s safety net ».
Thank you for sharing your story.
My adopted mom is bi-polar schizophrenic and had bought what she thought she wanted to be “normal”. She couldn’t have children but my dad (adopted) had boys from his first marriage.
I was the “prize”... she bought me.
But as a kid I promised I would never look for my biological family. I don’t remember being “pushed” to not search but in 2018 I broke that promise and could never imagine my story.
My birth mother had an affair while her husband was in Korean. My mom has always told me that my birth mom was given a choice, her husband or me and she chose her husband... and my mom would always say that “they were probably no longer together”... how would she “know” this?
Because she KNEW my birth parents! They ran in the same circles and my biological father would marry one of my adopted mom’s uncles.
I didn’t think I’d ever meet my birth mom... the ironic this is we DID meet. My birth mother and her two older children moved to small time Mississippi and in 1988 I became acquainted with the town as my ex-husband was from that town.
While out to eat in this small town where no one but myself and my them boyfriend (now Ex-husband) knew I was adopted one of my ex’s cousins pointed out that our waitress and I could be related we looked so much alike... that was my biological mother!!! I also unbeknownst to me met my half brother who was a part time sheriff in the adjacent town... he came to my in-law’s to pick up a donation and we were visiting.
I missed out on meeting both of my biological parents. In 1994 I remember telling my then husband that something felt off that day... I would learn 20+ years later that that’s when my biological mother passed away from complications of having a meningaloma the size of a golf ball from her brain... I have the same “anomaly”... it’s only 4mm tho.
My biological father died in 1987 and no one I have found knows why/how he died... and I have been unsuccessful in contacting anyone from that part of my linage.
Was also told I was Italian. Nope. Irish, Norse. It explains why I could drink grown men under the table. LOL
My mom Will always be my mom. Mental illness included. That doesn’t mean that she’s not stubborn she hasn’t spoken to me in nearly 7 years. But deeply I know that it is the mental illness that has brought us to this impasse. She turned 80 years old just yesterday (February 10, 2020)
Does this mean that I forgive her for the emotional, physical, mental abuse… I don’t know because it was my normal.
Quit the story!
I wasn’t adopted but grew up with very little contact with my father not know much about my fathers family. I’m now 54 and have found second cousins first cousins aunt and uncle. I even imagined to find cousins that my cousin had been looking for for 30 years
Such a beautiful story
Thank You. He wrote it long before I got to live it. I’ve been very blessed💚
shew. I was thinking she was not going to come to that realization...that she was fortunate to be adopted despite the difficulty.
I hope that you feel at ease now. Your older sister and your mom knew that you existed, and they probably prayed to meet you. That may have been the yearning that you had felt to have an older sister, their love was blossoming in your heart and making you want to search for them.
I am at ease now. There are many more details that have not been shared in this video. It has been an amazing experience. This October marks 20 years.
Thank you for sharing your story with us on TH-cam!!! It's very interesting!!!
I can understand if this isn't an easy subject for you to discuss!!!!💟💛💙💜
It is something I don’t talk about often. Thanks you for your kind words.
Stopped looking at after a few minutes. I interpreted everything OPPOSITE to what she did. Her mom did her job perfectly.
May God Bless you for all you've been through!!!
He has.
Wow beautiful story. So true God has us where He has for a reason. God bless u for ur story. Thank you.
you have so much to be thankful for, God bless
I can understand sooo much!!! I THANK YOU SO MUCH for sharing your story! I can see in you an awesome person, full of joy, intelligence and openness. I feel grateful, cause you gave me a perspective I haven't considered on the situations our Lord has to intervene to make sure the less damage is done. I've had SITUATIONS in my family too. Strong ones just like yours. You made me think of another perspective to understand my own reality. Thank you very much for sharing! God bless you and your whole family!
this video is beautifully touching ❤️🙏❤️ thank you for sharing such intimate, difficult moments. your faith has help you 🙏❤️🙏 be a wonderful person
You are a very special person. I'm sorry that your heart hurt for years but thankful to God that you were finally able to meet your family. God is good.
He truly is.
What a wonderful saying..Gods saftey net!🌹
That was an incredible story.
I feel for you, I pray peace that surpasses all understanding.
Peace has come. Thank you.
God is so Good to us. May God heal the hurt and restore all the locusts have eaten.
Sharda Norman I love your response! Yes, He so can.
@ Sharda Norman
Yeah right, he is doing a louzy job.
@Ange H Sorry you feel this way about my emotional journey at the time. This is only a snapshot of time and not the full story of my adoption reunion. Both adoptive parents and birthmother has passed away long ago. Lots of emotional healing has occurred since then 20 years ago.
What a precious lady to deal with this story with love and acceptance by trusting the Lord’s wisdom in taking her out of her birth family for her protection.
Praise the Lord. He knows and cares for our every need.
Like fuck he does , he leaves millions to starve , die of malnutrition and water bourne disease , he even stands by and watches his own priests rape small children [ mostly boys ] and these are the celibate ones !.
You are delusional. Take your meds.
Touching story.
Thank you. May God BLESS you.
You are so strong ! May you be blessed ! Hearing your story is so sad ! I have my own story but it is so long and depressing i will not get in to it !
I love this story. Love your sister just the way she is. My son is a little worse than Mary Jane. She needs love too.
I do love her. Visit her often. She remembers who I am now.
i took in my daughters best friend. her parents were addicts on meth. the daughter stayed with me from 15 and up. now her brother stays with me. he has adhd and is a handfull. we just go day by day. sometimes a person needs the youth as much as the youth needs a home. i took them in because I am the motherly type. i saw a need as well in them. i couldnt stand by and see the kids suffer. i understand your story but people who adopt have a lot of love to give.
It was a different time. I am old now. All adoptive parents and birthmother have passed away. I Mark 20 years of adoption reunion this October.
Beautiful story!
You gave a beautiful testimony! Thank you so much. Thank you Love and God Bless 🙏
Wonderful....Great Grace!
Wow. Very powerful
I feel like this all the time. I don’t have anyone to talk to that would ever understand.
God understands my love. Once you find HIM you will have found what your looking for. 💕🕊
When your adopted it's important to know your roots I'm still searching for mine on my father's side
My father name wasn't on my bc so I'll never know who he is. I'm truly sorry about that.
@@carolp8243 its possible with DNA test. cant guarantee but you cant say never with DNA test. This time of the year they are on sale..
Get your DNA out to every test you can, ancestry.com, 23andMe, Family tree dna, my heritage, then upload to GEDmatch. You are very likely to be able to figure out who your biological father is especially if you consult with someone who knows the finer points of this kind of research. I am sure there a groups out their that can guide you. Ancestry.com has a $49 special, 23andMe has a $79, black friday special. If you have not figured out who your father is with either of those two tests you can take your 23andMe data and upload to family tree dna, my heritage, and GED match. Now in days no name on the birth certificate does not at all mean you won't find him. I found out my aunt had a son that none of us knew about.
@@spuilloh2637
Yeah right, and even if you dont find anything its a change we didnt had before.
Keep up the search.
Sometimes not knowing is better than knowing
It’s all relative. And sometimes not knowing could be correct.
Touché. I have the exact story. Praise God.
WOW! Hope you’ve found your safe space!
Your adoption secret was to have a special bond between you and your adoptive Mom, sorry you missed it.
I’m glad you found your biological Mom but now it makes sense about your mental awareness.
How can you compare your two Moms?
Sad.
GOD Bless you, your bio Mom, Sister, Brother and adoptive parents (for they saved you).
There’s so much more to this story that wasn’t shared on the video. The comparison was relevant, both suffered mental illness. It’s just that one had lots of material possessions and the other had none. Yet the one without had joy and knew how to choose it. The other just could not get past her sorrows.