My addition to these tips is that most people are in survival mode. They built their entire personality around being safe. Hence why when they are alone, they can be present. But when around others, their old default network pops back up.
Exactly right! Especially if you have been consistently attacked by other humans, and if you're already highly sensitive or autistic, you are hard-wired To be on alert because other people are dangerous and the sky is blue... There is nothing wrong with keeping yourself safe first. Titration and managed exposure are only okay once you have a safe foundation to touch base.
I'm surprised that this is not mentioned more often. Living in a traumatized and traumatizing culture makes it very, very hard to be centered and in the body. Existential safety is a requirement for relaxing enough to settle and be present. Huge issue in spiritual awakening.
I recently joined a Sufi group and they were quoting from a book which I believe was written by Pir Elias Amidon, and it said "Only speak when it improves on Silence."
Couple of quotes that I have come across before are “Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.” “BEFORE YOU SPEAK, LET YOUR WORDS PASS THROUGH THREE GATES: "IS ITTRUE?" "IS IT NECESSARY? "IS IT KIND?" Trouble is remembering them when you need to use them.
Just to add to tip #2 - if your pause lasts well beyond when the other person stops speaking, it's good to say something like, "I'm just taking a moment to take in what you said." Otherwise, the other person may think you weren't listening if you just stay in silence.
That second tip is very powerful for me. I speak less and less the older I get, which extends to those instances when I might have reacted previously. A third tip for me is to feel ongoing gratitude, so challenging people or situations are just practice, reminding me to stay grounded (barefoot if possible!). Best to all from Germany!🌻
@@TerriblePerfection so beautiful ❤️ This reminds me of one of the 8 training verses of the mind by Geshe Tangpa: Even when someone I have helped, Or in whom I have placed great hopes Mistreats me very unjustly, I will view that person as a true spiritual teacher
@@TerriblePerfection Thank you for sharing, it makes me truely happy when I see beautiful souls sharing their wisdom from a place of authenticity. Liebe Grüße aus Österreich, Love & Light @ all 💟🙏💟
been looking for a video exactly like this for ages--thank you. i have avoidant personality disorder and have experienced this dissociation around everybody in my life since i was twelve years old. an inability to identify my thoughts and feelings and identity while in the presence of others--but perfectly capable of doing so while alone. has made me feel like nobody truly knows me, and have felt very alone. really appreciate these tips! felt very seen
There are the words being spoken, but similar to Eckhart Tolle, you convey a sense of presence that accompanies the words, and this is very fulfilling and insightful to experience. Thank you!
Thanks i've been practicing colour grading and using my camera recently and feel i'm getting to a place where it kind of makes sense. i'm an old dog learning new tricks hehe
Yeah very good tips and video, it is weird and I especially notice it with people from the UK, is this need to never have silence, like theres this fear of silence because it will make certain people feel awkward or weirded out, so you get a constant need to fill the air with often meaningless words because you fear feeling an awkward emotion or well your mind tells you its something to dread and fear and its really not nessasary to constantly be talking, its so very liberating to just be with someone for a time to be present in someones company but no need to be constantly letting conversation flow and to savour that moment with them in silence without any awkwardness and speak when you choose to and nothing is forced.
This I experienced a lot, and as you stated inner body awareness has been crucial, especially acknowledging my heart as where we really reside (as opposed to the head, and also being conscious that it's the whole body we inhabit). perceiving stillness instead of reacting really roots you strongly, thank you for sharing so simply a so powerful teaching.
The video after yours has only a saying, that fits perfectely what you adressed, from Motivation.doc : "Take care of your thoughts when you are alone, and take care of your words when you are in a group ".🙏
The Buddha taught the 4 foundations of mindfulness.. for coarse situations like friends the only wise refuge (if you're distracted) is the body.. however, if your friends are worldly and stupid, theyre best left behind as you walk the path without them
Thank you so much! I just got invited to a big family gathering and really didn’t want to go because it felt suffocating to think about because I know I’ll get pulled out, even slightly, from deep presence! And then I open TH-cam and this is the first video I see! Thank you God, thank you divine reflection! 🙏🏽💚 I guess I’m going … and using this as a catalyst to keep practicing deep presence even in big groups!
How wonderful. Go gently, there's no rights and wrongs in this kind of practice just the gentle exploration of the moment. Hope you have a great time. ❤️
Have you attended your family gathering yet? How did it go? I work with individual clients at a time and can do this with strangers yet with my family its been the most difficult.
@@logarithmic7 I ended up not going! I had to triple check myself, and ask WHO is wanting me to go and why? My Ego or Spirit! And I came to the conclusion I don’t need to force these moments of growth or treat them like they’re fleeting! Because life is our constant teacher and we can learn and grow from every moment that happens! So I decided to rest instead because that is what I truly felt would serve me the most! And then when I happen to be around family or a big group again naturally, the work will naturally get done too! 🍃🤍✨
@@zovinamaria I am so glad you choose to really honor your journey and not force the whole situation! Total respect to you and Thank you for such a thoughtful and inspiring response. Great questions to ask of ones self too! Much Love! 🥰
Thank you so much for the video! I have struggled with people pleasing for a while, and I am just starting this beautiful journey of presence and feeling what it’s like to be really myself and in the moment. I resonate strongly with your advice! I think also being truly vulnerable with people is what helps me right now. Putting myself and my feelings and thoughts right on the table, and choosing who and what I surround myself with. Thank you again!
Solid Advice. I usually wind up finding something else to say that winds up being better if I wait a moment. Also nice to hear someone else mention noticing their feet. I do that all the time.
Thank you friend I will certainly try this. A tip that I have started to do is try and notice the spontaneity of peoples' and your own actions and to see how they arise and cease, what caused them to arise and what caused them to cease. I believe this can pair greatly to what you have said, may you grow in blessings 🙏
Thankyou for sharing this simple way to be more present in our experience. Your gentle sincerity of presence shines through For me that’s the power of this message and not just the words. 🙏
I think waiting before speaking is a great idea. Thank you. I find it difficult, in a social setting when someone asks you a question, which catches me off my guard and makes me feel a bit awkward. This is a time when I respond too quickly, in a kind of panic I suppose...then regret it later when I had time to reflect.
My first time encountering you , and my first feeling after hearing your first words : yes ! Thank you ! This to me is truth , because I experienced this . ....I just needed the reminder. Thank you , beautiful 👌 Liked and subscribed
Here's another helpful tip when someone acts with negative feelings toward you: make believe that the other is you. There will be no stress in you, and you will feel the Presence.
The TH-cam algorithm continues its mysterious doings. It is only in the last month that I have been able to come out of my head and "drop down into my body". The benefits have been extraordinary. I have been practicing both of your suggestions and here's your video - just a week old - confirming it! Thank you. 🙏🙏🙏
What beautiful advice given so openly and graciously. At 1:08 in and you said "stay in the body" I resonated so deeply with it. Something as you said, so profoundly simple! Thank you for sharing.
Thanks 🙏🏻; going to put these tips into action today when I take my dig for a walk and come across neighbors who generally derail me from a peaceful walk 😅😅😅
When my partner is speaking and asks a question, if I don’t immediately respond, he automatically go into thinking that’s me saying ‘“no” without any words spoken. And will keep talking as though to defend or backtrack what he just asked. I keep saying that I just need a moment to process. It happens so much. And this happens with other people. The pause just really throws people off. Which throws me off lol. And I end up speaking before I’m really ready to.
Very good info, thank you. I always found that my brain would freeze when I was with several people and my energy would fracture and be "out there" somewhere. I learned to pull my awareness back to my heart center and speak from there. Also, after listening to this vid, I listen more and speak less and wow, there is such a power in silence. This is such good information, thank you again.
Great wisdom, thank you so much for sharing it. I am meditating for almost five years trying to do every day, read a lot of books, but I have not heard it until now such profound advice. Namaste.
Thank you so much for these tips. I have been struggling with being present for quite sometime now, to be present when conversing, interacting with someone.
My addition to these tips is that most people are in survival mode. They built their entire personality around being safe. Hence why when they are alone, they can be present. But when around others, their old default network pops back up.
I think this comment may have just opened my eyes. Thank you.❤
I agree 100%
Exactly right!
Especially if you have been consistently attacked by other humans, and if you're already highly sensitive or autistic, you are hard-wired
To be on alert because other people are dangerous and the sky is blue...
There is nothing wrong with keeping yourself safe first.
Titration and managed exposure are only okay once you have a safe foundation to touch base.
💯
I'm surprised that this is not mentioned more often. Living in a traumatized and traumatizing culture makes it very, very hard to be centered and in the body. Existential safety is a requirement for relaxing enough to settle and be present. Huge issue in spiritual awakening.
I recently joined a Sufi group and they were quoting from a book which I believe was written by Pir Elias Amidon, and it said "Only speak when it improves on Silence."
@@EponaDreams-AmbientDreamscapes beautiful ❤️
@@EponaDreams-AmbientDreamscapes I really love a lot of Sufi teachings and Sufi music especially. It moves me very deeply. 🙏
@@Awakehereandnow me too
Couple of quotes that I have come across before are
“Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.”
“BEFORE YOU SPEAK, LET YOUR WORDS PASS THROUGH THREE GATES:
"IS ITTRUE?"
"IS IT NECESSARY?
"IS IT KIND?"
Trouble is remembering them when you need to use them.
Thank you ❤🙏
Just to add to tip #2 - if your pause lasts well beyond when the other person stops speaking, it's good to say something like, "I'm just taking a moment to take in what you said." Otherwise, the other person may think you weren't listening if you just stay in silence.
It's very good advice! Thank you
That second tip is very powerful for me. I speak less and less the older I get, which extends to those instances when I might have reacted previously.
A third tip for me is to feel ongoing gratitude, so challenging people or situations are just practice, reminding me to stay grounded (barefoot if possible!).
Best to all from Germany!🌻
@@TerriblePerfection so beautiful ❤️ This reminds me of one of the 8 training verses of the mind by Geshe Tangpa:
Even when someone I have helped, Or in whom I have placed great hopes Mistreats me very unjustly, I will view that person as a true spiritual teacher
@@Awakehereandnow Exactly 🥰
@@TerriblePerfection Thank you for sharing, it makes me truely happy when I see beautiful souls sharing their wisdom from a place of authenticity. Liebe Grüße aus Österreich, Love & Light @ all 💟🙏💟
@@friedvoll_Sein Vielen lieben Dank! 🥰
Thank you wonderful perfect great idea🎉
This is great. Thank you.
"As I breathe in, I'm aware of my whole body
As I breathe out, I'm aware of my whole body"
been looking for a video exactly like this for ages--thank you.
i have avoidant personality disorder and have experienced this dissociation around everybody in my life since i was twelve years old.
an inability to identify my thoughts and feelings and identity while in the presence of others--but perfectly capable of doing so while alone. has made me feel like nobody truly knows me, and have felt very alone. really appreciate these tips! felt very seen
There are the words being spoken, but similar to Eckhart Tolle, you convey a sense of presence that accompanies the words, and this is very fulfilling and insightful to experience. Thank you!
It's my pleasure ❤
The framing and color grading of this video fill me with joy
Thanks i've been practicing colour grading and using my camera recently and feel i'm getting to a place where it kind of makes sense. i'm an old dog learning new tricks hehe
Yeah very good tips and video, it is weird and I especially notice it with people from the UK, is this need to never have silence, like theres this fear of silence because it will make certain people feel awkward or weirded out, so you get a constant need to fill the air with often meaningless words because you fear feeling an awkward emotion or well your mind tells you its something to dread and fear and its really not nessasary to constantly be talking, its so very liberating to just be with someone for a time to be present in someones company but no need to be constantly letting conversation flow and to savour that moment with them in silence without any awkwardness and speak when you choose to and nothing is forced.
It's basically the same here in Brazil, as if people are scared of silence.
This I experienced a lot, and as you stated inner body awareness has been crucial, especially acknowledging my heart as where we really reside (as opposed to the head, and also being conscious that it's the whole body we inhabit). perceiving stillness instead of reacting really roots you strongly, thank you for sharing so simply a so powerful teaching.
Around others (especially friends and family, for what it's worth) is where I still find plenty of contraction. Thanks for this
Excellent tips!! Occupying the body mindfully really is that antidote to dissociation and dysregulation ❤️
Saving this in my meditation playlist so I can come back. I love these types of videos that allow me to get out of the marketplace and center me.
Be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.... book of James
Great tips. Here's is another one that I'm learning to practice: be aware of your breath: every inhalation and exhalation.
👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
The relational field is always tricky but it’s where we can get into the real work ❤
The video after yours has only a saying, that fits perfectely what you adressed, from Motivation.doc :
"Take care of your thoughts when you are alone,
and take care of your words when you are in a group ".🙏
Sir, you are an exquisitely beautiful being.
The Buddha taught the 4 foundations of mindfulness.. for coarse situations like friends the only wise refuge (if you're distracted) is the body.. however, if your friends are worldly and stupid, theyre best left behind as you walk the path without them
You think mighty highly of yourself.
Thank you! I am grateful for that reminder.
Thank you so much! I just got invited to a big family gathering and really didn’t want to go because it felt suffocating to think about because I know I’ll get pulled out, even slightly, from deep presence! And then I open TH-cam and this is the first video I see! Thank you God, thank you divine reflection! 🙏🏽💚 I guess I’m going … and using this as a catalyst to keep practicing deep presence even in big groups!
How wonderful. Go gently, there's no rights and wrongs in this kind of practice just the gentle exploration of the moment. Hope you have a great time. ❤️
Have you attended your family gathering yet? How did it go? I work with individual clients at a time and can do this with strangers yet with my family its been the most difficult.
@@logarithmic7 I ended up not going! I had to triple check myself, and ask WHO is wanting me to go and why? My Ego or Spirit! And I came to the conclusion I don’t need to force these moments of growth or treat them like they’re fleeting! Because life is our constant teacher and we can learn and grow from every moment that happens! So I decided to rest instead because that is what I truly felt would serve me the most! And then when I happen to be around family or a big group again naturally, the work will naturally get done too! 🍃🤍✨
I worry SO much about family gatherings. So much weirdness and friction.
@@zovinamaria I am so glad you choose to really honor your journey and not force the whole situation! Total respect to you and Thank you for such a thoughtful and inspiring response. Great questions to ask of ones self too! Much Love! 🥰
Tip #1 is my go to almost all the time. The body energy is alive 🙌🏾
Thank you so much for the video! I have struggled with people pleasing for a while, and I am just starting this beautiful journey of presence and feeling what it’s like to be really myself and in the moment. I resonate strongly with your advice! I think also being truly vulnerable with people is what helps me right now. Putting myself and my feelings and thoughts right on the table, and choosing who and what I surround myself with. Thank you again!
How beautiful thank you so much for sharing and speaking from the heart ❤️
Many Thanks for most helpful post.
A clear and concise video, presented with a peaceful tone. Thank you. Glad to have found your channel.
Thank you for sharing this!!
Agreed. I think feeling is the most important Sense. Habitual thinking has momentum but is less strong each occurrence.
Much gratitude!
Thanks and thanks for embodying the spirit of the Benevolent Mother and Father simultaneously and flowing that Ethereal Cosmic Love in!
Solid Advice. I usually wind up finding something else to say that winds up being better if I wait a moment. Also nice to hear someone else mention noticing their feet. I do that all the time.
Love!
So loving.. Thanks!
Simple and so vital!! Thank you
Thank you very much for this insight!
Thank you.
Thank you 🙏
Coming into the feet, or any part of the body, is also useful even when I am by myself, which usually involves lots of thinking.
Great Ideas here..
This guy's one of the best on this nonlocality lark
I needed this video today. About to spend a week on holiday with my family with no time alone
Short, sweet and to the point. More helpful information than most 90 min talks 🙏
Thank you x
Really great reminders thank you so much. 🎉
Thanks for the tips😊 appreciated.
Can't wait to try this 🤩🤩🤩
True, true 💯Sounds so easy. And is so hard to do. Second for second...
Easy to understand… yes. Practice the key word here . Thank you.
This is spot on advice. Simple in theory, profound in practice.
Thank you friend I will certainly try this. A tip that I have started to do is try and notice the spontaneity of peoples' and your own actions and to see how they arise and cease, what caused them to arise and what caused them to cease. I believe this can pair greatly to what you have said, may you grow in blessings 🙏
That step two is profound. Thank you for this.
Words I am perfectly prepared to hear. Thank you so much!
Thankyou for sharing this simple way to be more present in our experience. Your gentle sincerity of presence shines through For me that’s the power of this message and not just the words. 🙏
Thank you for such a lovely comment. I'm really glad that this resonates with you. ❤
This was a helpful reminder! Thank you sir!
Thank you. I really needed this. ❤
GRACIAS!
De nada 🙏
Thanks for your presence
Om Ah Hum Vajra Guru Padma Sidhi Hum. 😊😊😊
Sadhu 🙏
I think waiting before speaking is a great idea. Thank you. I find it difficult, in a social setting when someone asks you a question, which catches me off my guard and makes me feel a bit awkward. This is a time when I respond too quickly, in a kind of panic I suppose...then regret it later when I had time to reflect.
My first time encountering you , and my first feeling after hearing your first words : yes !
Thank you ! This to me is truth , because I experienced this . ....I just needed the reminder.
Thank you , beautiful 👌
Liked and subscribed
Thank you for your lovely comment and support. I'm glad this resonates and I hope this simple practice opens some explorations for you. ❤
This is very helpful ❤
Great tips. Valuable content. Will practice to keep calm and slow to react. Many thanks for sharing.
Thank you for the tips! ❤
This is great. Very helpful. Thank you!
So practical, thank you!
Love this!
Agree this is the correct approach
Beautiful, simple, practical, and infinitely powerful practice you’ve shared here brother 🙏 thank you for putting this into the world ❤
Thanks for all your friendship and inspiration Zbizzle ❤️
Here's another helpful tip when someone acts with negative feelings toward you: make believe that the other is you. There will be no stress in you, and you will feel the Presence.
I love this, thank you!
I’m glad to have seen this today. Thank you.
Something if come to remind myself of when I feel anxious around others: ask questions about their experience.
Good stuff. Thanks for the reminder
thank you for this video
Thank you so much for this.
The TH-cam algorithm continues its mysterious doings. It is only in the last month that I have been able to come out of my head and "drop down into my body". The benefits have been extraordinary. I have been practicing both of your suggestions and here's your video - just a week old - confirming it! Thank you. 🙏🙏🙏
How wonderful thank you for sharing. ❤
Stay in and wait. Awesome work. Wishing nothing but good for you.
Very auspiciously timed teaching. Thank you! :)
So simple but beautifully effective.
Thank you. First time listening to you and it's uncanny the timing of this particular video entering my timeline.
Wonderful advice, thank you!
Talk about the right video at the right time! Thank you.
What beautiful advice given so openly and graciously. At 1:08 in and you said "stay in the body" I resonated so deeply with it. Something as you said, so profoundly simple! Thank you for sharing.
Thanks 🙏🏻; going to put these tips into action today when I take my dig for a walk and come across neighbors who generally derail me from a peaceful walk 😅😅😅
When my partner is speaking and asks a question, if I don’t immediately respond, he automatically go into thinking that’s me saying ‘“no” without any words spoken. And will keep talking as though to defend or backtrack what he just asked. I keep saying that I just need a moment to process. It happens so much. And this happens with other people. The pause just really throws people off. Which throws me off lol. And I end up speaking before I’m really ready to.
I also take my sweet time thinking. You need to let others know you're thinking about it so they understand the coming silence as intended.
Whenever I talk with my uncle on the phone, if I don't say something immediately when there's a pause, he nervously asks "are you still there?"
"All I can do for another, is work on myself"
Get in the habit of saying "hmmmmm"
Trust me, it works.
@@scottnichols2450lol that happens to me at work!
this is GREAT stuff. genuine delivery, simple and effective practices, accessible to all.
I'm absolutely gonna carry this advice with me.
Great advice
Helpful tips. Easy to remember. Thank you! ❤
Thanks 😊
Very good info, thank you. I always found that my brain would freeze when I was with several people and my energy would fracture and be "out there" somewhere. I learned to pull my awareness back to my heart center and speak from there. Also, after listening to this vid, I listen more and speak less and wow, there is such a power in silence. This is such good information, thank you again.
Finally a simple, practical method for navigating this life. No long list that I can’t remember. Thank you!
Powerful wisdom. Thank you.
Good advice
Thanks you
Thank you :)
Great wisdom, thank you so much for sharing it. I am meditating for almost five years trying to do every day, read a lot of books, but I have not heard it until now such profound advice. Namaste.
Thanks for this - a great reminder to start the day.
Thank you so much for these tips. I have been struggling with being present for quite sometime now, to be present when conversing, interacting with someone.
Prompts this reaction from me: good to hear. Thank you.
Wow😮
Stay in your flow, by accepting yourself! Never shame condem youself. You are your own judge ♾🫡