I would accept social anxiety and social fears. They are valuable ESP information that comes from unknown parts of our body and soul, and in the same time, anxiety is a smoke detector to detect fake people, danger and predators. The goal is that we learn how to live with mechanism inside us that allow us to detect intrusive people. This means - instead of panic - I see panic as dysregulation, due to complex trauma. It is natural effect of Skinner's box, being in operand conditioning of invalidation and criticism when our persona was developing - therefore it is normal reaction to abnormal past events. Now in adulthood - I have ability to detect distortion - someone who is hysterical very easily. The trick is that I do not self-pathologize myself. The problem is not me. Problem is the other person. And then - the next step is actually solution to avoidance pattern: That I become scientist, Sherlock Holmes - I put people in laboratory setting and seek clues - am I over-reacting, if not - how I know that other person is dangerous. Then - natural step is - how can I retort to difficult and criticizing and negative people in functional and proper manner. There are ways to retort without drama, explosion or general avoidance and isolation from society. So - social anxiety is part of complex trauma - that is where toxic shame and panic stems from - it is not something that is hallucination or something to feel shame and guilt about - it is mind mechanism how the brain reacts to toxic environment. Also - social anxiety is part of Darwin evolution - it is related to learning and educating myself how to deal with society in proper, functional manner. That is Humanistic therapies, humanistic psychology approach - which I see works for anxiety situations. The goal is that I accept and validate myself - which is anti-dote to trauma and toxic shame. Another goal is that I focus on my dreams and action and exposure - but exposure is directed in direction which are in accordance to my values and my desires and what I define as good. It is not frantic exposure - to toxic environment. So I put myself in charge - I see this as best approach to dealing with anxiety. Without anxiety I would never learn concepts such as egocentrism, external reference locus of control, and Darwin would look to me like strange and mysterious process that is only related to ancient biology past, bacteria and animals. "Improving our relationships is improving our mental health." William Glasser They see us as timid, shy, weak, or unsociable. Fearing these labels, we try to be like others. But that leads to our becoming overaroused and distressed. Then that gets us labeled neurotic or crazy, first by others then by ourselves. The Highly Sensitive Person, Elaine N. Aron may be a mistake maker, but I'm also a mistake breaker. Maxwell Maltz Control is a dangerous thing. And errors, errors are what is the real expression of the individual. Because if Picasso puts an eye where it shouldn't be, one sees it more clearly that if placed where it should be. Jean Cocteau
Let me know below: is there any ONE person whose judgment you worry about the most?
Thank you for this. Great video!
I would accept social anxiety and social fears. They are valuable ESP information that comes from unknown parts of our body and soul, and in the same time, anxiety is a smoke detector to detect fake people, danger and predators.
The goal is that we learn how to live with mechanism inside us that allow us to detect intrusive people.
This means -
instead of panic - I see panic as dysregulation, due to complex trauma. It is natural effect of Skinner's box, being in operand conditioning of invalidation and criticism when our persona was developing - therefore it is normal reaction to abnormal past events.
Now in adulthood - I have ability to detect distortion - someone who is hysterical very easily.
The trick is that I do not self-pathologize myself. The problem is not me.
Problem is the other person.
And then - the next step is actually solution to avoidance pattern:
That I become scientist, Sherlock Holmes - I put people in laboratory setting and seek clues - am I over-reacting, if not -
how I know that other person is dangerous.
Then - natural step is - how can I retort to difficult and criticizing and negative people in functional and proper manner.
There are ways to retort without drama, explosion or general avoidance and isolation from society.
So - social anxiety is part of complex trauma - that is where toxic shame and panic stems from - it is not something that is hallucination or something to feel shame and guilt about - it is mind mechanism how the brain reacts to toxic environment.
Also -
social anxiety is part of Darwin evolution - it is related to learning and educating myself how to deal with society in proper, functional manner.
That is Humanistic therapies, humanistic psychology approach - which I see works for anxiety situations.
The goal is that I accept and validate myself - which is anti-dote to trauma and toxic shame.
Another goal is that I focus on my dreams and action and exposure - but exposure is directed in direction which are in accordance to my values and my desires and what I define as good.
It is not frantic exposure - to toxic environment.
So I put myself in charge - I see this as best approach to dealing with anxiety.
Without anxiety I would never learn concepts such as egocentrism, external reference locus of control, and Darwin would look to me like strange and mysterious process that is only related to ancient biology past, bacteria and animals.
"Improving our relationships is improving our mental health."
William Glasser
They see us as timid, shy, weak, or unsociable. Fearing these labels, we try to be like others. But that leads to our becoming overaroused and distressed. Then that gets us labeled neurotic or crazy, first by others then by ourselves.
The Highly Sensitive Person, Elaine N. Aron
may be a mistake maker,
but I'm also a mistake breaker.
Maxwell Maltz
Control is a dangerous thing. And errors, errors are what is the real expression of the individual. Because if Picasso puts an eye where it shouldn't be, one sees it more clearly that if placed where it should be.
Jean Cocteau
Hi there. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on social anxiety.
Its tough
I agree.
If you don't look like someone i would walk up to in public. Then i won't watch your video.
Then don't lmao