Overcoming Eating Disorders | Can Ask Meh?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 31 พ.ค. 2024
- - This video contains discussions on weight, body image and eating disorders -
Are you trying to look hot? Did you lose weight? Were you proud of yourself?
These are some of the questions that people who have struggled with eating disorders answer on the season’s last episode of ‘Can Ask Meh?’.
If you are trying to overcome your eating disorder and wish to receive support, you may consider joining Support for Eating Disorders Singapore (SEDS), a support group under Singapore General Hospital Eating Disorders programme. Visit their website for more info: www.sgh.com.sg/patient-care/s...
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NEVER EVER HAVE THEM SAY THEIR NUMBERS, lowest weight or anything like that. People who make this don't know eating disorders are competitive ? it's basic knowledge. And also they shouldn't have to say it, or justify their diagnosis. It's a mental health issue not a weight issue.
something in common with all or most of them is that their trigger starts off from a thoughtless remark made by others about their weight or appearance,,, i just wish that everyone can be a bit more mindful and cautious with what they say about others’ appearance;(( lets not bring one another down but lift each other up instead! ❤️
True
Yea, my biggest fear is inadvertently making a comment that triggers someone else's issues with food. I wouldn't wish this on anyone else.
Someone pls tell this to all the guys in my life
I agree.
Mine kinda started like this too, but I had already the idea so it's not her fault, but my friend's mom asked me if I gained weight.
(She regretted it after (sincerely, I hope) so there's no problem).
I really feel like people like that (relatives figures) are often the ones making tis type of comments 🤔🤔
@@equinox2639 Sometimes even the smallest remarks can be really triggering and set us off, I totally understand. It may be difficult, but try not to let what other people think about you affect you! You are strong and I wish you all the very best in recovery! ❤️ You can do it!
actually kinda sad that ppl dont think of the overweight side of eating disorder. i went through a whole ordeal in myself and eventually got binge eating disorder where i just couldn't stop myself from eating no matter how much i tried. i cried because it made me feel like shit and i know its wrong but i couldnt stop. there are eating disorder like that but people always associate eating disorders with losing weight etc. not to undermine anyone going through this because each journey is tough on its own.
Me too, there's very little awareness of any eating disorder that doesn't fit the anorexic or bulimic descriptions. I have been through all variants of eating disorders - restriction, binge/purge, binge, overexercising, etc. People don't understand that binge eating is not a moral deficiency and that fat shaming doesn't help ANYONE at all, whether they have binge eating disorder or not.
how are you coping ?
@@meganmorais5240 completely agree with you. its just hard to get people to understand because their reply will be "just stop eating"
@@sammyeatchips not so sure I am coping more than just tolerating ahahaha I try to delve right into work and forget about these kind of things which is actually really unhealthy
Exactly. I don't have weight issues if anything im underweight which kinda bothers me...but i totally understand eating problems away because food does make you feel good when you feel bad. Im always eating more junk food when im stressed or sad.
the lady who found out that it all boiled down to sexual abuse, you are frigging strong. don't ever think otherwise.
ivana yeah really traumatic events can be completely blocked from the mind, or more commonly, people don’t realise what they experienced was sexual abuse
@@ivana9496 based from house and greys anatomy, yes. the brain will protect itself from trauma.
thank you
@@ivana9496 yes is totally normal and eanything can unblock the memory. You can be buying clothes and suddenlly something trigger your brain to unblock the memory.
what the girl in short hair was saying - i felt her words in my bones. she phrased it so right. it's about thinking you have control over what has control over you instead. just thinking about it all the time, jojo-ing between feeling proud of yourself and feeling completely disappointed and even disgusted, seemingly out of nowhere. also, the girl in black curly hair said that she didn't tell anyone, but she desperately wanted someone to see it. this is so true i can't even begin to describe it. it's like you don't want to be a victim, so you dont say it out loud. but you want them to see all the shit that you're doing, your suffering, so you hope they notice. but then again, you don't want them to treat you differently, so you say you're totally fine. it's a cycle. it's crazy. even as i'm typing this, i already am thinking that i'm overdramatising it way too much so i'm just gonna post
You can't over-dramatize what is actually dramatic. Being a prisoner of your own mind is awful soul numbingly painful. No matter what it is.. depression ,anxiety , addiction..
I hope that you are in a better place right now ❤️ I may not be able to be in your shoes, but I've been there, having suffered from an eating disorder and depression, and I just want to let you know that there are people out there who care for you and support you. You definitely can recover, and I believe in you! Wishing you all the best.
I don’t think you’re overdramatizing it at all. I felt the same way when hearing them talk about it cause it’s so so real. I felt like my world and all my “dreams” came crashing down all around me when my doctor at the time told my parents about my eating disorder. It was literally the worst day of my life at the time. I knew then that nothing was going to be the same, cause my parents would be watching, my siblings knew and would be watching, and my disorder thrived (and still thrives) in silence. If no one knows, I can go about doing what I’m doing and make up what I want to satisfy people’s inquiries from time to time (ex: “oh I ate earlier” or “that meal was good” and I had thrown it up already) and you’re right it’s a vicious cycle. I hesitate to say I’m recovered, because I have to watch myself and avoid triggers cause I fall back into those habits easily every day. It’s gotten better but it’s still a battle every day. I really hope you are well, you’re not alone.🖤
I've heard girls in school jokingly make comments like "you anorexic ah" "you puking out the food ah" idk how they are so comfortable with saying those comments. it's rude and insensitive. it might be even worse if one of the girls are actually anorexic or have other ed.
Nah I'm anorexic and it doesnt bother me
원예 but that’s doesn’t mean it wouldn’t affect other people :) (no hate)
@@strawbotomy okay? So? You dont represent everyone with an ed. Stuff like that said by people is extremely ignorant and your opinion doesnt change that
원예 so? I was anorexic and it bothers me. Your point served no purpose. Looking at your channel, you’re probably a young person who doesn’t understand the impact that words can have on a person’s psyche
@@strawbotomy as the other few comments said, you're comment was very ignorant. it doesn't bother you but it may for others.
You guys are all so brave
Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate out of any mental illness. They are addictive and recovery is tricky and not at all linear. Thank you for bringing this topic up, and to the participants that allowed themselves to be vulnerable and share their story.
This channel is so underrated.
Indeed! Well said.
OGS is one of my favourite channels, and I'm so proud that it's a local channel cos there are not a lot of content creators out there in SG that create such wonderful content that is high quality, original and shines a light on important issues. ❤️
Well said !
As a male who’s going through this right now... It’s hard.
Stay strong❤️
You are more than enough just as you are. Stay strong and reach out to loved ones. God bless.
@@carisaling3541 It's a hard fact to swallow. The world is out here telling me that how I am isn't good enough, and it's hard as hell not to listen. But thank you. To think that there are people willing to reach out creates hope.
@@CloudRunnerRex
Its may seem hard to swallow now but remember, it is a FACT!
I personally suffered from anorexia for 7 years. But I was rescued by Jesus Christ who died for us, redeems us by His blood and loves us so much.
Know that there are those who love you. And recovery is a hard process. You are brave for sharing your struggle. Thank you! You got this.
@@CloudRunnerRex wishing for your healthy and happy life!!! Dont give up and know u are important ❤
pro tip: when making these types of videos, leaving out scenes with descriptions of ways to purge or which 'diet' to follow, and not telling how much a person lost in weight, is super important when it comes to triggering viewer's EDs or acidentally encouraging people to lose weight in unhealthy in dangerous ways.
i felt like the questions were very stereotypical and didn't invite for a deeper conversation about the topic. changing questions to make them open (where the given answer can't be a simple "yes" or "no") and asking about their feelings at the time, what helped them get better and how they look back on it now would be really insightful, interesting and valueable. :)
I am so glad someone wrote this. It is so true. During my eating disorder, all of the "informing" videos and movies like "to the bone" or smth similar were just an encouragement. Like it they could have done this you can too. Or like, ok, she lost 10kg, if you don't loose that you have not succeeded. It is a veeeryyyy sensitive topic.....
so true. i literally only watch these videos as an encouragment
@@sofiastar2933 please, don't do this to yourself. If you have an eating disorder or you think you are getting one, try to find help. I really don't want anyone to feel all the shitty things I felt........ please. I am more than one year in recovery and I still have horrible consequences connected to my digestive system, teeth, blood and ect......Please don't get yourself there......
exactly it's pretty triggering for those who suffer with eating disorders.
Valentina Sjeničić unrelated n from a stranger - i’m so proud of you for starting recovery 🥺you deserve self love , stay strong n keep fighting !! 💖💖
when she said "yes somethings wrong with me people are noticing!" literally my mood LMFAOFOFOF
FELT THAT
“I try to focus on what I am, rather than what I’m not” damn
It brings tears to my eyes thinking how someone's backhanded remarks can cause so much hurt for people. My Ed started when I entered fifth grade. I was called fat and shamed and called disgusting for eating a hamburger in my school lunch cafeteria all by a girl I thought was my best friend. I couldn't rely on my family at the time even though I was just a young girl. I'm still struggling with an Ed more in the form of a mental disease now instead of physical. But in the past it was a frightening mixture of me neglecting physical and mental needs.
All I can tell you is once you begin loving yourself you will find your purpose. God bless you.
The lady who said she was a survivor of sexual abuse broke my heart while she was saying that. You could really see the pain in her words...I pray for your healing and your happiness. I am sorry for what you went through, and I hope your soul and your heart heals someday ❣️ bless you
Indeed, same here
8:13 i think is such an important point that society overlooks. by complimenting someone for losing weight, we are indirectly communicating the notion that "skinny= good". i've been called sensitive for highlighting this point in the past but i just think words have such a strong place in people's lives, especially preteens and teens who are trying to discern what societal values to absorb as their own.
cannot thank these ladies enough for their courage and strength to share this part of their lives with us
deerseokz losing weight when you’re overweight is good. Nobody says skinny is good. When someone says you’re skinny it’s a negative thing and that you should gain weight. Being an ideal weight is good and healthy. We should encourage each other to be healthy.
Yesss, and its far worse in Asia. The standard of beauty always equates to being slim. Its so common to have people throw casual remarks like "did you lose weight?" "You look slimmer" it makes it hard for people to feel positive abt their figure. its like finding a problem with yourself which you never thought you had.
I totally agree. I've stopped commenting on people's weight loss because I never know if I'm encouraging an eating disorder.
@@hughmadson5131 nobody said losing weight when you're overweight is bad. I think you should consider thinking about why you felt the need to highlight that.
@@hughmadson5131 almost EVERYONE today thinks skinny= compliment you must live under a rock lmao
dont know if the anyone featured or the channel will see this, but I would like to say thank you for sharing these:
I've struggled with my body image for the longest time ever. I'm overweight and being a guy it doesn't help, especially when you have guy friends. no I don't have any disorders, but I can relate to the issue regarding one's body image. and it feels good to know that I'm not the only one
Happens to everyone, you're definitely not alone!
@louis and... why do assume he's not already doing that?
Adding on to this, while I appreciate the inclusion of other ED aside from Anorexia, and Bulimia, Binge Eating is actually much more common but unspoken for. Male ED sufferers are also being swept under the carpet a lot of times. And it would be good to mention that many times while ED is rooted from a specific weight or body goal, it is ultimately a mental illness and should be treated as one.
Si Ying Yes! I was hoping for male representation in this video.
I agree, as a guy I have went through some disorder as well like binge eating/purging and body dysmorphic, and we guys goes through exactly what female have went through especially body dysmorphic. Nobody knows but this disorder (body dysmorphic) is the hardest to recover for me coz nowadays it’s all about body image in the society and looks.
The hardest part for me actually are when you try to overcome it, and then start gaining some weight. I'm still try to figuring out how to end this circle
honestly in singapore , eating disorders are really not that common. so by watching this video , it felt really comforting to know that i’m not alone here :)
I look forward to OGS content. So when the premiere reminder came up, I was excited. And it's a topic that hits very close to home for me.
Struggled with an ED for years (still am) and got help last year only when I started becoming suicidal. I've never been hospitalised however, and that fact has always made me feel invalid. I felt like I didn't deserve help yet because I wasn't thin enough. In my mind, I was still a worthless blob of fat.
I just wanted to write this comment because I wanted to say that recovery is possible to anyone out there who is struggling as well. I'm in a much better place because I choose to overcome it and make the effort to change. It's a long journey, and a tiring one, because it's essentially a battle with myself (and the habits and behaviours that make me disordered). Eating disorders are usually tied to one's identity and without it, I felt like no one. But I slowly realised I was much more than my weight, my body and appearance, the size of my waist or wrists...I had a personality, likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses that made me me. [Cheesy!]
Thank you again OGS for exploring content that hopefully sparks some much neede conversations and awareness around EDs in Singapore. Like many other mental illnesses, there's a lot of misconceptions and stigmas that need to be addressed. :)
[Side note: Do comments get deleted once the premiere ends? Hopefully not? xD Maybe I'll repost this comment when you guys upload for real HAHA]
Trying to self-recover from my undiagnosed ED too... never told anyone about it but it’s almost been a year. Hope you’re doing fine during CB!
No the comments dont get deleted! :) Good job for emerging stronger out of this!! As a wise friend of mine once told me, progress is never linear. Take care!
Take my power! 🙌 ❤️🥦
@@buttertoast6097 glad to hear that! Don't be afraid to reach if you need it though. :)
Wishing you well, we believe in you!! Thanks for leaving this comment, and all the support
This really shows how some small comments can trigger something much worse. I hate how people online justify insulting someone for their weight by saying "oh I care about their health" because if you really did care, you'd love and support them and help the people you know in real life instead of going on social media and bringing someone down.
i cried through the whole video, it is so relatable. my life was like this, chasing for the body i will never have in order to feel worthy. now i realize how screwed up it all was, i should not have wasted my youth and health on this, but i will never have those years back. i hope anyone who it fighting eating disorder now will find strength to break free as soon as possible
I love your series a lot.
The angle of real life, real issues, real people that most don't talk about is so resonant.
Just some thoughts u can completely ignore cuz its great as it is.
Wish there were some male representation. In this video or more diversity.
At the end of the video, there were lessons we could take away from it but the reportage can perhaps be framed better by inviting an expert to summarise key points brought up and provide some coping mechanisms with a big disclaimer that people who struggle with this should seek help from a professional.
I just find that ppl take what they want from these kinds of interview and framing is very important. Some interviewees even go to the extent of describing the journey of self harm which could be the only thing that people hear resulting potentially-the copycat syndrome.
Keep on doing the good work guys. Gambatte!!!
Thanks for the feedback, we appreciate it and will improve! :)
As a Singaporean and former sufferer of anorexia myself, I am so happy and proud of OGS and the girls in this video for having the courage and bravery to share about eating disorders. So much more needs to be done to raise awareness and de-stigmatise eating disorders and mental health issues, especially in SG, because there are more and more Singaporeans who are developing ED, yet our society is not as open in sharing about these topics compared to Western counterparts. Therefore, I applaud this video, and I personally also want to create more resources and share my experience to help other Singaporeans who may be suffering from eating disorders ❤️
I loved this video, though one small suggestion I would make to OGS would be that perhaps you should not have included numbers like weight in the video, as such info can potentially be quite triggering to some people who are suffering with ED! If you guys ever would like someone to talk to, I'm always open
although I really appreciate them coming forward to talk about such a sensitive issue, I'm a tad bit unhappy about how some of yall mentioned numbers and things that are obviously triggering to people who are suffering from eating disorders, such as myself. I dont blame yall though, EDs thrive on validation so that's probably why alot of yall felt the need to mention it but a tw beforehand would be nice. I definitely wouldnt recommend anyone who is still struggling with an ED to watch this as it may bring cause more harm than good, I am glad however that yall are bringing awareness to the fact that EDs arent about losing weight and looking pretty, it's more about how it can make you feel in control, how it's a coping mechanism so thank you for that (hopefully this made sense!)
Agree. the tw in the description is there, to OGS' credit, but by the time I saw that, I had already watched the section on one of the women talking about her p*rging. It might be good to consider adding it in at the beginning of the video if future videos touch on potentially triggering topics?
I thought you were describing a problem men faced at first..ED..
Yea a trigger warning before hand would have been good
@@NeverShoutNever45454 considering the title of the video that should've been a big enough warning as to what was being discussed...
Girl with the yellow shirt and short hair seems like a very wise person I love her energy as well
Jeezuz - I hope everyone are mindful about their words.. words hold such considerable amount of weight.
Each and every one of you here are beautiful, believe me
Be the best version you are
And also, your loved ones love you for who you are
They want you to be happy because seeing you happy makes them happy
They don’t care about that stretch mark, that water weight you gained overnight, that pimple etc
Love you
I haven't had an eating disorder, but I do understand how the buildup of health issues is frustrating when you realize that it's your own fault. I was under eating for about a year without even realizing it. I used to be bullied for overeating, so I just wanted to stop over eating. But, I didn't know how much I was actually supposed to eat, so I went about it carelessly. On top of under eating, I was drinking 5 cups of coffee a day, and at the time wasn't aware of coffee being an appetite suppressant. I also think that a huge reason for my carelessness was just sleep deprivation.
I stopped once I had a whole collection of health issues; anemia, fainting spells, frequent illnesses, joint pains, and stabbing cramps. I was CONSTANTLY falling asleep. I had two major fainting spells; once during a science class (apparently I made a big scene and I woke up to the principal sitting in front of me and the whole class leaning forward to stare at me on the floor), and once at home (I collapsed, hit my head on the wall, and fell on tile flooring). I once got so sick, I was nauseous, dizzy, had no appetite, at random I had essentially water exiting both ways, often simultaneously, and I fainted a few times from dehydration. I could hardly roll over on the couch without having to then crawl up the stairs to the bathroom to throw up. I missed a whole week of school because of this, and nearly had to reschedule an exam. It wasn't a good time.
Under eating seriously messed up my metabolism, so I've been trying to recover it. I've been gradually increasing my food intake, going for a walk every day with my dad, and exercising lightly every few days during free time as long as I'm up for it. I've also cut down on the coffee, and I try not to drink anything before meals. And, I make sure to mostly eat healthy food with prioritizing for my personal needs, but I usually have a small treat or two every day, like some biscuits and ice cream. It's been working amazingly, I sleep better, my skin is better, I have a ton more energy, and I've added another 2cm to my height. I don't get easily bloated anymore, and I've gained an inch around my hips, all my other measurements are about the same.
I really can't imagine how much it would suck to have all that happen while also having body dysmorphia, and how much harder it is to recover from. Best wishes to any of you guys dealing with or recovering from an eating disorder.
Such a great episode! I so agree that eating disorders don't have to be in the form of anorexia/bulimia. It doesn't have to show a physical change in the body. It resides in the mind, the unhealthy relationship and thoughts we have with food, with our body. It's a tough fight and everyday is still a journey to recovery. Our self-worth should never be determined by our physical appearance. We are so much more than that and there's so much more in life than just how we look. ❤️ Sending love!
When I was a sufferer, this was over 20 years ago, it was a time without social media, digital cameras, etc. It was hard to find websites for “thinspo”, let alone self-help.
I imagine it can be a lot more complicated now during this time where it is easier to access/come across “material” that can just make ED so much worse.
But the good thing is that there is a lot more awareness. Back then, where I lived as well, hardly anyone knew what anorexia was. Even if they did, I doubt I was ready for help for a long time... until I was actually ready to start confronting my food phobia, etc. If that makes sense.
I slowly got better, but... you know. Life is challenging. I relapsed after experiencing sexual trauma (again), and when I went through other stressful periods of my life. I won’t go into too much detail.
Anyway, I’m glad I got through it on my own. Sometimes I still get plagued with thoughts relating to BD, but I have to keep working at it. It’s like you’ve joined a club you can’t really leave for the rest of your life. It has made me a stronger and more self-aware person though.
I’m a therapist now (not specialising in ED, btw). And I hope all these life experiences have made me more resilient. I hope the same for those sharing their stories and living it through the accounts of others.
Thank you for reading this if you took the time x
17:05 reminded me of how i always try to find something positive in others that i could compliment on... just because that's how i wish someone would do to me
People should always watch what they say. Words can be harmful to a person's mental's health.
I don't think anyone under that category can handle the coldest type of rejections where they just go "oh no..I wouldn't go out with you". rejection is not going to fall under harmful words at any point, if you got problems with that one...go get some help before you go into incel or femcel shit.
THANK YOU for having the courage to make this video. Both the girls who interviewed for it, and the people who made it. It would have been even better if you had found a guy to interview, but I know those are kinda hard to find. Eating disorders can take a different form among men, and not always easy to detect compared to weight loss and passing out. Here's a big *HUG* for you guys. Mental health is a tough topic. And sometimes the older generation or other people don't understand that comments and criticism and shame can cause a lot of damage (I know, right?). Education is important. Your voices are so important. I'm so proud to be living in this time where we can see these conversations growing. It's been 14 years since I first learned about mental health being a Thing - and it was someone I cared about who had an eating disorder, so it has a weird place in my squishy little heart. And back then, we weren't educated about it at all. These days, slowly, I'm seeing the changes, and it's thanks to things like this
“Me trying to find an identity, if I couldn’t be anything else I could be a skinny person.” This resonates deeply with me. And it was so refreshing to hear her say that it’s good to focus on what you can be. All the good parts of you. I needed that reminder.🖤
Be kind to each other guys, words affect more than you think
Weighing scale is a DEVIL!! A healthy body is always not about the weight.
This video makes great points and I like the fact that they chose people with ED to show their struggles and tell their story. But there are some important things that people need to consider:
1- People overweight can also have an eating disorder. You can be fat and still have anorexia, or bulimia; because ed is a mental illness, that sometimes can have physical consequences.
2- Binge eating is also an eating disorder. Even though it's not talked as much as anorexia or bulima, it's still valid and has major consequences on a person's life. And because it isn't as recognized, it's left out and people don't seek help. You are valid ❤️
3 - You have can an eating disorder and not lose weight. Like I said before, ed is a mental illness and the physical effects that it has is only a consequence of the mental illness.
4 - Eating disorders don't always evolve around body image or beauty standards. Sometimes people develop an ed due to depression, anxiety, ocd, etc.
Ed can be a consequence of another mental illness.
5 - When making a video about eds, NEVER ask a person what they did/ate. You might not realize it, but it gives ideas to people who are currently struggling with an ed.
Nonetheless, I think it's great that more people are talking about this illness and trutly giving it attention. Thank you for that ❤️
For me it was also the comments of others that started my eating disorder and it took 10 years for me to recover. People should be more considerate of their comments as it can affect others so much
When she started talking about her daughter and showed us her lockscreen (of her daughter) I started bawling
eating disorder is often a *symptom* of an underlying issue.
it's best to get actual therapy to fully recover and even then, recovery is a huge graph with so many dips and spikes. stay strong if you're going through it. treat your body with care. for those with immense self-hatred, it's going to be tough but think of it as another chance. once you're ready (in some cases, you're not because your body gives up on you before) i hope you get proper help and overcome. even starting small.
remember, it's one step at a time. stay strong and stay safe
It is amazing and so brave for them to share their stories however I just gotta point out how numbers (weight, height, kgs lost) and specific examples of how a person engage in behaviours (daily intake, way of purging etc) could be triggering and really unhelpful to put up on a social media platform which lots of young or vulnerable people or ones who are already struggling with EDs have access to.
Hi, thank you for making this video and raising the awareness of this issue. Eating disorders are exhausting (they slowly suck out every inch of your life and you can lose a lot of things). Recovery is daunting but worth it - to anyone who is thinking of recovery but find it scary. Also, you will find a lot of things more interesting after you are less focused on food. On a side note, you can be fully recovered. I know that some people say that you have to be careful because you are always in remission. However, you can be fully (100% recovered). BTW, just a tiny recommendation - it may be better to leave out how much they weigh and how much weight they lost because it can be triggering to some people deep in their eating disorders. I remember I used to be quite obsessed with other's weight and height and compare my numbers with theirs. Also, it's better to ditch the weighing scale (it doesn't do people in recovery any good).
19:19 this hit so, so hard. all i can think about is "i have to at least be good at restricting or else i'm not good at anything"
Thank you for making this video! Listening to other's articulate what you're experiencing helps me validate and confront my own feelings and experiences. This was very comforting and eye-opening!
my worst fear: trying to recover but ending up with binge eating disorder bc i'm suddenly trying to eat a lot more and my body is like,,, enjoying it to the fullest in a way ??
i myself have been on the heavier side of the scale my whole life and growing up two of my best friends both diagnosed with eating disorders. it's still a battle for one of them and I remember all the pain and frustration the three of us would casually comment on our looks that day.... this episode is so insightful and while might not have been exactly what my friends were going through, I feel as though I was enlightened as I think back to the times when we were younger and I could have been more understanding and a better supporter while they recovered.
I know what it's like to hit rock bottom with multiple eating disorders. Thank you for this video. You girls are so beautiful!
Hey, super appreciate the openness and integrity of these strong women and I hope anyone struggling with mental health issues find help and hope
These words hit so hard... I cried a lot while hearing all the stories because I can relate so much. Thank you so much for this honest and inspiring interview!
i’m actually thankful for this vid and in the past, a few years ago this was a very foreign thing in singapore and i knew something was wrong with me. i wanted to get better honestly because im a dancer and i didnt want my performances to be affected. but when i search up for anorexia and bulimia on google, the results i got were tips on how to cut calories, or how to purge and all and i was like maybe i dont have an eating disorder because no one else in singapore had it. and honestly, at that point i felt super isolated from everyone and my performance academically and on stage were so bad i realise i had to stop but till today, i havent really recovered, but to prevent myself from going back, i just remind myself that im eating to get stronger and perform better on stage and that really helped. im also sure this vid will help alot of people with eating disorder, especially in singapore :”)
I just wanna give all of them a big hug!! Thank you for sharing your stories!!
I needed this! I love seeing that others have understand what I have and am going through.
This topic is especially hard to talk about within Asian families and cultures. Food is a big part of our socializing but then you still have to look slim and beautiful. The standards are harsh. Really comforting to see you lovely girls talking about it but also so sad so many have experienced the same pain. So many comments really resonated with myself.
I remember the main trigger for me was when I was growing up and my dad, who was almost 6 feet tall and weighed 165 pounds, would point out people on the street. I was naturally an average weight, and I didn't care about other people's weight, and I didn't care about mine. But my father would say, How could you live like that or how could you be happy with yourself. I somehow convinced myself that I looked twice the size I really was.
This video... this video is EXACTLY what I am feeling and I have NEVER heard it vocalized before.
You girls are so beautiful... Oh dear. Really made me teary to hear what you all went through.
all of these things these beautiful women have felt, I have felt before. Before this video I thought I was very sick because of the way I thought about myself and food. while it is very sick, I was still in denial of how bad it was even though I knew deep down. thank you for sharing your stories.
was looking forward to this episode ever since i saw the trailer for this season!!!!
I’ve been in recovery from anorexia for almost 4 years now. I was sick with my eating disorder from 17-21. All of college and my last year of high school - which isn’t very long compared to some people who battle for a lifetime. I still have moments that are hard, where the thoughts come back and bite at me. Even if I’m not comfortable with my body (even though it’s so healthy and I feed it and treat it so well, the sick part of me wants to be sickly thin but it has gone from that being 100% of the time to such a low number) I am so thankful to be alive. I am so thankful I can be free from the slavery anorexia was. It’s still work every day to ignore the voices that tell me I’m too fat/I need to not eat/miss being underweight, but it’s so worth it. I can be a mom one day if I want. My heart has healed from muscle loss. My hair grew back, my nails are strong, my eyes shine. I don’t think about food all the time. I am full. I have energy. I can do things - run and play with my dogs and so much more than I could do in those years. There is so much hope.
A common trigger seems to be people's remarks. Should people not comment about others' weight at all or should people remind others in a certain way? We look at ourselves every day and sometimes do not realize that our weight has become a problem (unhealthily fat or thin).
Thank you so much. These days have been really hard for me and this video really helped me. Thank you
I really like this channel. A very positive and heartwarming method of tackling difficult issues while being connected to all level of audience. Keep this going! 👍
I don't know when you collect the questions, but I have another one. How did/do react when people tell you you look "fatter" after achieving a healthy weight again? Because I suffered from anorexia, and even though I don't want to live that hell again, everytime people tell me I look chubbier or fatter makes me feel like all the pain I felt before and during recovery was meaningless because it comes back again.
This is a really good video.
I like how real and honest they are even if its hard opening up about it.
Im still recovering from anorexia and its been 10 years now.
Im not totally there yet but Im certainly a lot better than i was years ago.
One day at a time.
❤
Thank you for speaking our thoughts out ♥️
i love this series so much i would actually wait for this channel to post new videos about Can Ask Meh
Salute for all of you..hope you stay struggling and keep healthy
I was an overeater and bulimic for almost 7 years- started during college. Stomach pains, swollen jaws, sore throats, obsessive mindset- I don’t miss it. I’ve been free for 11 years now. At the time, I really thought I would die from it or (what scared me most) still have it when I was middle aged or senior. At the time, I never saw it as exercising control over my life, but looking back maybe I never felt in control of my own life as it was always dictated by my mom. The day I told my mom I was moving out of the house, and in with my bf- it stopped almost cold turkey (I lapsed twice during that year). Have hope. The path to recovery is not straight or clear, but it is there.
Thank you for having us OGS ❤️
Love the conversation, so deep and real. Thank you for the sharing, beautiful ladies!
You guys spoke my mind you have this non existent ideal image that when you get there you’ll stop but you never get there ..
OGS good job👏👏👍💪
I love this series😍
Hope a new season of "Can ask meh" series returning soon!!
Thank you so much OGS
Thank you for this video. It was very needed for me!🙏🏻
I hope this could serve as a reminder for everyone to know how much their words can affect others. If you have nothing nice to say, please just don't say it.
LOVE IT THANK YOU SO MUCH all these people are just wonderful 💟💘💕❤💞💝💜💗💖
I've always struggled with avoiding eating disorders. I'm short and chubby and people love to comment on it. A low blow I was given was from an ex of mine. He tried justifying his cheating and lies by saying he didn't want to be with a whale... It hurt. It's so easy for your mind to go to that negative space, especially with being a girl, and it so hard to revert back to a place of positivity. When I realized how close I was to developing an eating disorder I made the promise to myself that I would stop trying to restrict and shit for vanity reasons and that if I was to change my diet and exercise it would be for health reasons only. I now aim to be a healthier me... not so much a thinner me anymore. In high school, a peer of mine came forth and sought treatment for anorexia and I guess that memory has always been the tension that kept me from going off into the deep end. If it wasn't for seeing what she went through and thinking that I didn't want to be in that same position... I would have probably developed a full-blown eating disorder. Society is so harsh and it's so hard to feel good about yourself. That being said we should always promote being healthy. Not thin or thick but just healthy. There's a point where being curvy can be unhealthy. Some of us have natural curves but there are people whose weight can be traced to their personal eating and lifestyle habits. If you speak up about it you get jumped for "fat-shaming", but I think that's a line that should be defined more. What's the difference in pointing out unhealthiness and fat-shaming? At what point do we define that difference? And the same goes for thin shaming. Some individuals struggle with gaining weight and they get shamed for being thin and get told that they are disgusting for having an eating disorder... even if they don't actually have an eating disorder. I've seen it a lot with Kpop artists. It's difficult to live with.
thank you for this, thank you for sharing your stories
I was looking forward to this video when I saw this in my subscription box. I'm near 80kg now and it's messing with me. During CB I tried not eating after realising I was feeling more bulky and lethargic cos of the lack of movement and stuff... and watching through this video it made me shocked how I felt exactly the same way (proud of myself). In the end I started eating again and my brain saw that as a "lack of self control" and I berated myself over it, but now I'm "controlling" in a healthier way by cutting down carbs.
Really sincerely appreciate the interviewees for agreeing to share such a sensitive part of themselves.
As someone who's overweight now and has had all types of eating disorders, I hope you can know it is ok to exist at whatever weight you are. Lots of people have been misusing science to impose distorted moralistic thinking around bodies, eating, exercise. It's normal to gain weight with less movement/activity in this period, you don't necessarily have to restrict your food intake (carbs are not unhealthy, from a nutrition science POV), but if you don't feel more hungry as a result of lessening the carbs it is ok. You don't have to 'compensate' for weight gained. One does not endlessly gain weight and I think that fear is what keeps people in disordered eating patterns. Wishing you joy and self-love!
This is the sad reality of eating disorders.. It all starts as some kind of relief of a traumatic situation. My eating disorder is caused by my lack of control in my life. I also previously use to purposely hurt myself.. Both are considered self harm behavioral traits. It literally is nothing but a form of control. It’s something that an individual person can do to themselves without any sort of known backlash from others. It’s hard to deal with.. People that have addictive personalities, like myself, fall back into that terrible habit constantly. I deal with the intrusive thoughts all the time.. it doesn’t magically just go away. It can take literally years to even come up with a reason why the problem started.. Pleas everyone be cautious of yourself and everyone around you. You don’t know the struggles somebody else is having, and YES everyone has struggles. It doesn’t invalidate yours, all it means is that somebody else is going through something hard too. Just be kind to others. A simple gesture can go a long way.
Anyone who is going through binge-eating/compulsive-eating disorder, without bulimia?
Yes :)
Mhm :(
you're not alone, and this period it's so hard to not relapse into the downward spiral :(
tell me about it
Same! Highly recommend the TH-cam channels What Mia Did Next and Side By Side Nutrition, which have helped me in my recovery
You guys are extremely brave and strong ♥️
Thank you all for sharing your story ❤️
Thank you for this story! These girls are all beautiful and very brave.
I've been through so many ups and downs myself (wouldn't call ED maybe because it hasn't gotten so severe) and with the lock down, even though I have a lot of work, I constantly think about food. The only thing that controls me is the money aspect. I'm also trying to shed some weight so I'm exercising 2 hours a day, don't know if that's too much but I'm just constantly trying not to think about food.
Not very relevant, but just wanted to let you know I'm thankful!
If you're reading this, hope you have a great day! Take care!
hi love. thinking about food all the time might be a signal that your body is not receiving enough food (the nutrients in food etc.). you might wanna speak to a healthcare professional about that if possible. maybe see a dietitian to make sure you are getting enough food in your diet. i suggest you check out stefanny buttermore's all in journey (not sure if her name is spelt like that but if you type it with "all in journey" her channel will come up on youtube) for more info on this. and 2 hours of exercise per day with no rest days could be too much if you are not a professional athlete - it depends on how intense the workouts are and if you are getting enough food for fuel and rest. might also be a good idea to speak to a healthcare professional about that. I hope that you are doing well and I wish you all the best!
Touch rugby really helped me too! I was a pretty chubby kid when I was about 10, and I always felt that I was uglier than my classmates at school because they were so much skinnier than me. When I started playing touch at 11, it took awhile, but I changed my goals from wanting to be stick thin, to wanting to be able to run as fast as I could and get as strong as possible. I even played on the national rugby team for awhile. It's been 6 years and I'm 17 now, I still sometimes feel myself reverting back to my old mindset, but I'm learning to love the feeling of being strong and fit. I now go to the gym regularly, I do boxing, and I still play touch rugby, and my main goal is to become a stronger person both physically and mentally!
you're all beautiful and brave!! thank you for telling us your stories
I cant tell you how much I related to some of these stories, I now don't feel so lonely for some of my reallllly weird ed behaviours. Thank you,really
Going through ed is hell but trying to heal and fight it is even worse. I’m proud of this girls and i hope i can win this battle and heal too💖
This is so real. It’s really not just the desire to look attractive. Even after you hit the weight you desired, there is this “background voice” that keeps telling you that you are STILL fat. Maybe you’ll “appear” to be eating with your family or friends and that’d be it for the next 3 days... people might be worrying... but it really doesnt matter anymore because you dont feel good after eating. You feel fking fat even after losing 10kg.... You feel so much better when you dont eat. This would keep going and going the words inside it just keeps lingering...
such strong and beautiful women. thank you for this.
This was amazing. So validating💕 also so interesting how similar their accents sound to west African accents so cute ☺️
Nice video. I was surprised that Singapore is now more open on ED. Here in the Philippines, only few are aware of it and here we lack professional help and awareness.
I love these series so much 🧡
I feel like no one really talks about eating disorders in Singapore, especially the ones which aren't the stereotypical "anorexia, skinny-type". I wish there was more talk about mental health in Singapore :(
I suffered from eating disorder for a couple years and it fucked up my body in many ways. It was quite an experience. Like, it is super fucked up and hard to manage, but on the other side I felt powerful and special. Like I was finally "that girl", "that skinny girl" everybody was jealous of. And every comment on how skinny and sick I looked was a compliment for me. I am fine now, but it still hits me when I see old pictures od my bodie. In some way it formed the way I am, I grew up faster than others. So I can't say it was fully only bad experience(it was but I think I was lucky to get all the good from it and heal) . And it is hard to understand it never really goes away. You just learn how to control it and how to live with it. It does get better though. I promise 💕
they're all so amazing i wish them all the best
Wow all the ladies in this video look very pretty I hope they’re really loving themselves now!
My best friend was very very ill because of her eating disorder. I almost lost her and a lot of her family still doesn't understand that their comments are harmful and was the reason she starved herself. It's so important to think about what you say to others and how you word things because it can really mean the difference between life or death sometimes.
All of them are truly beautiful la.