"Buhlaque Girl Magic" is over...and I’m glad. | Ti Talks
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ม.ค. 2023
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I realized “making it look easy” is basically not admitting how hard it was.
💯
A word
Speak on it sis 👏🏾
It doesn't matter cause the whole world knows they've tried to get us to quit buh the Creators that we are, we haven't quit, lol
I'm not a fan of making anything look easy. Why do we have to pretend that we don't bust our butts to get things done and life is hard. Where did this culture of pretence come from?
Black Girl Magic reminds me of Simone Biles being everyone's favorite when she was bringing home all the gold, but when she decides to protect her mental health, she's a quitter and washed up. Hell，Gabby Douglas was Black Girl Magic until they met their magic quota.
Exactly
@deenie smothers Respeto
It’s even got us thinking that the next Black girl just being “regular” and living an average life is somehow losing. It’s too much!
Oof -- you said a lot, in just a few words here. You're so right!
This!!!!
@@nappyheadedjojoba Hey, will you be talking about these PROTESTS that is going on FOR "T. NICHOLS" and how CERTAIN people demand that "US" be the SACRIFICIAL and LONGSUFFERING OBJECTS for THESE protests, even THOUGH it is NOT reciprocated BACK to "US" when "WE" are the victims, such as: Breonna Taylor, Atatiana Jefferson, and Shanquella Robinson😒😒😒??? Quick results/justice for "them" (black men) but what about "us" (black women)🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️? I had to put my two cents in certain online conversations about the stated issue above☝️☝️☝️.
🎯
Right. It’s exhausting.
I started correcting people IMMEDIATELY when they referred to me as strong "nope. i'm a regular person who cries and bleeds.' LET ME TELL YOU how the mood would shift.
Forreals on this one. I denounced being called a 'Superwoman'. Upon sharing news of my new tech certs to a BLK male small biz owner, it was all =This= confusion when I rebuffed & immediately made him claim himself outLOUD as THEE Superman... It got weird immediately; he didnt wanna play flipmode 😿
Same here. Had a friend say in the group chat “black women are gonna save the world” and I shut that down REAL QUICK. We are no one’s mules…
I go as far as to declare myself the weaker vessel who is delicate and dainty. I'm not here to save anybody. Save ME!
Omg me too!! I had a sweet, unassuming, white neighbor, tell me that I should be fine being single, because I’m so strong, I was absolutely aghast, and told her, I need protection just like every other woman, as black women we definitely need to start directing people, we may look strong in that we have everything together, but we need to love commitment, and marriage just like every other woman. I’m sure she doesn’t think that she’s too strong to have a marriage!
Yes ma'am
"black girl magic ain't magic, it's resourcefulness" is a WORD! The pressures of everyday living in America really wears you down and I don't want to be glorified for marching through it anymore. There's a reason our lives are often cut so short often times...I'd rather be "weak" 🤷🏿♀️
Thank you!
Well stated! Its hard enough as it is when I think too hard about our daily pressures. I just prefer to be me.
Get that passport girl.
right im weak which is why I need a restful life ;)
Submissive
I wish Black woman took their friendships & sisterhoods more seriously. There’s gold in that! We should start there tbh
Agreed
Me too but unfortunately even if it starts off good it ends in envy and jealousy. Tbh my closest girlfriends ain’t the sistas 😔
@@-_Somebody_ sounds like you think non bw are better🤔
@@justme2272 nope
@@-_Somebody_ U forgot to mention COMPETITION and them being SUPER judgmental.
I retired Black Girl Magic & Strong Black Woman phrase a LONG time ago because I was TIRED of people looking at me as magical, superhuman, something who don’t experience pain, or have regular ass feelings and emotions. I have anxiety, depression, hormonal issues, and all the other things that all women go through. I’m not magical because you don’t see my pain. For centuries we have not been able to show our pain out of fear of being perceived as weak, or not strong. I’m done with that.
It’s not “magical” to be amazing at what I do. I’m amazing at what I do because I’m an amazing person…that’s it…that’s all.
🎉🎉🎉 you have so eloquently stated my very sentiments! 🙏🏽💥💥💥
This! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Or narcissist
Thank you for expressing my sentiments
Truth be told the first self made female millionaire in the USA was a black woman.!!!!
“Being “magical” should never have been a prerequisite to being cared for.”
Puh-reach!!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
I remember someone telling me I had black girl magic because I uploaded a video on fb of me playing the piano.
I said, nope I practiced hours to learn this. It wasn't magic at all🤣
💯💯💯
It feels like a dated product of an era like #GirlBoss. It feels somewhat cringy to say out loud and even though black girl magic was said with good intentions.
Absolutely -- great comparison.
That’s because it was a trend lol
Everything is a trend anymore, even social “movements”
On a walk through Walmart today I saw merchandise with Girl Boss and Black Girl Magic on the shelves. All I could do was this ➡️🙄
Very capitalist and highly cringe worthy.
the truth is...#girlboss was always corny
people just realizing it now
Along with "Boss Babe". Ugh.😑😑😑
I never liked black girl magic. Even before the BWE space I knew that black women were the change-makers, the movers and shakers. But I also knew that it came at a cost. A lot of black women are overweight, stressed and depressed and it’s because they go around saving everything and everyone else but ourselves. I am amazed, because we’re doing to work to undo the negative stereotypes and we are leaving behind what harms us.
YES -- so well said. And I'm also encouraged to see so many of us starting to put down these burdens and learning what it really looks like to love on ourselves.
Yes, we are definitely waking up to a lot of things. I know I am.
@@DH-uw3us listen 👀 and I hope you're staying away from all the marching, organizing and advocating that's going on this week.
Let the MEN handle this situation and burn the cape.
@@lauren6509 I wouldn't even dream of it.
Many of us are so extra and do the most when it comes to every single thing. We want to be seen and appreciated and I get it. But we can't keep fulfilling the narrative of having to be twice as good as everyone else to get any credit. I will happily be invisible, just good enough, and well rested.
I will never forget the black girl who posted on Instagram her being in labor while taking a final exam with the #blackgirlmagic. SO many black women were congratulating her and her "black girl magic." It was sad. The expectation to excell and accomplish no matter the circumstance, even when you're bringing another life into the world, is absolutely dehumanizing.
Not to mention black women have the highest mortality birthrates
Thank you for this conversation starter. "Black girl magic" along with "Black Excellence" are no longer in my vocabulary for all the reasons you so perfectly stated.
YES -- I did a whole rant on "Black excellence" a while back, and I'm thinking it might be time for a continuation/revisit with that conversation.
Too many people over used and commercialized those terms. They were everywhere and stamped on everything 🥴 Next up: “Soft Life, “Soft Life Era” Anything “soft,” really 🤦🏾♀️ Oh, can’t forget, “Clean Girl (tf)”🥴
@@nappyheadedjojoba Yes, please!!!
" Ordinary should be available to us."👏🏾
Yep! We are inadvertently reinforcing the inequality in terms of having to be perfect at work to get the rightful pay and promotions, be a 4.5 GPA student to get accepted into programs, have an 800 credit score just to get a fair deal, or be an "ideal" woman to get a man. Meanwhile, everyone else can be average and thrive.
Everyone else can be average and flourish which is sickening…
@@rachelmcmullen3908 I would even venture to say that others can be below average.
@@sweetzCA Exactly. Some think it’s just an uplifting phrase but we shouldn’t have to constantly tear ourselves apart overachieving to be seen as worthy to society. My mom tells me that’s why she is the way she is, an overachiever. She goes above and beyond at work and her white coworkers get intimidated and put to shame because they don’t need to over-perform. It’s exhausting and depressing
It is exhausting.
Yeah its like we gotta be twice as good to get half as much, smh
Feeling quite unmagical, as I sit on my couch eating a chicken pot pie and drinking a cup of tea. But somehow, I still survive 😉. Love ya chica. Happy New Year.
😅 Sounds perfectly valid to me! And happy '23 to you too!
Girrrl, I LOVE pot pies!😂
Okay but that’s valid. I’m biased because I love chicken pot pies though.
Black girl magic always felt infantilizing to me. Even though I was a “girl” when it became a thing, felt weird and cringe to call women “girl” 🤷🏾♀️
I feel you on this -- I even thought about touching on this in the video, but I feel like that's a whole 'nother conversation (similar to how "Black boy joy" has always hit my ear in a strange way).
"The solution to one extreme is not to swing to the other" - TRUTH!!
Is it weird to say I inspired to be average growing up. It's didn't have wildly aspirational dreams. I didn't have a dream job I just told things that I thought people wanted to hear. I didn't want to change the world. I just kind of wanted to be a person who was happy and got through life and things were pretty good. Does that sound weird? And at times #BlackGirlMagic made me feel a heavy weight that I didn't want.
Same here. I dont want to be a billionaire extravaganza...I just want a happy life where I dont dread waking up and sludging through the day.
My mom is always saying I’m not living up to my potential and she keeps telling me I could change the world. I’m okay being normal and average nothing wrong with not chasing potential world domination. I’m 23 and already jaded everyone expects black women to know better and do better because of this perceived magic and it can also lead to adultification of black girls. There was a Georgetown study on it and it truly broke my heart. Let black women and girls be black women and girls.
Me too. Tired of trying to be extraordinary. I just want to be.
No, I'm the same way.
I relate to this so much. I always just wanted to have a place of my own, a dog or 2 with a yard for them (still working on the yard), and above all *peace.* A life where I have everything I need -- and even many of the things I want -- makes me feel like I've "made it," but there are loads of people who would say that's a "waste of potential," a "lack of ambition," etc.
Black girl magic had us running ourselves into the ground for nothing. I stopped last summer trying to shoulder everything. I am resting.
👏🏾👏🏾
I feel the same way about the term 'black excellence'.
Yeah, I get the energy behind it, but why can't I just be average and still excellent? Or not necessarily even WANT to strive for exhaustive excellence?
Babyyyyy, the looks of disgust I've gotten when I say that to other people...
You really hit the nail on the head with "exhaustive excellence." I think it's a wonderful, fulfilling thing to strive for excellence _in the purest sense._ But, what that actually has come to mean in practice for *us* in reality is actually harmful in a lot of ways because of the way the deck is stacked.
Don’t fight me y’all but I always thought black girl magic was cringe 😬
Nah, I feel you. 😅
Guess they gone have to fight us both cuz I always thought the same lol
Samesies. I wouldn't claim it publicly for reticence of being the self professed magical kneegro (however I would cheekily, amongst other BLK women because it's purely praise amongst sisters) although I did recognize that the masses them were capitalising upon our collective & historical *jenesequois* as the latest it-factor of hashtaggy derivative commodities... Cringey on that level because snake oil mucho? Un poco? Whatever. Glad it did what it done did alreadies.
Man listen! I hate quippy terms like that girl boss, bad bitch, clean girl or any of that other dumb shit lol hate it.
I didn’t think much of it as it brought some positive representation for black girls to look up at like Simone Biles or Rihanna but like the over hype of it made it fade into something gimmicky
Whew Chile! You've said a few things. I have been called an alien by a Norwegian woman before. I was working two fulltime jobs at the time. She was convinced that she was giving me a complement. By saying that I was super natural. I explained to her that I shouldn't have to work so hard just to live. She laughed it off and damn near got slapped. I stand for normal and ordinary if a person so chooses. I don't wish to be gassed up to go over and beyond on a consistent basis.
👏🏾 ALL of this.
TH-cam sent me down the rabbit hole and I ended up on this channel. But your comment stuck out to me. As far as what you said, get with someone who has a stable but progressing job/career and struggle with that person until he gets to the position he earned. U don't have to do it alone and neither are you supposed to. Lower your standards a bit and you'll see the benefits in a few years. The lady was laughing at you because she can't imagine her life being like yours.
@@followmeleadthewayProjection much???Living a regular life without constantly striving for "magical " isn't having high standards in my opinion. And why is struggle love with a man always the answer? My peace is non-negotiable.
@@LadyAzama struggle in the sense of hey I got a new job/career its gonna be a few years before I get to where the money is good, until then hey it may be a little tight. Nothing struggle about that
These white people know the system they benefit from, smh Ive gotten nasty looks when Im strolling in the middle of the week/in the middle of the day from white women they swear we are here to be their slaves jeje no
I saw a girl who looked just like you in profile outside of Amoeba records one night, and yelled out ‘Nappy Headed Jojoba!’ thinking it was you.
Her boyfriend turned around and said ‘What did you say?!’ And I was mortified-Lol!
When I explained that I thought she was you, they started laughing, said good night and walked off!
🤣🤣🤣laughed so hard because these are the kind of things that happen to me. I would be frantically typing on youtube to show them who she is so they don't feel I was being out of turn. So funny. Good thing they were open to listen to your explanation.
@@4cberry -Lol! I actually did call up her TH-cam, and when they saw her they couldn’t deny the resemblance!
😂😂😂
Needed this laugh 😂 Thanks @guruuvy 😘
OMG!!!
I always hated “black girl magic” and “black excellence”. Living in a black body and making it through life is exhausting enough. Those phrases always reinforced the idea that you have to be exceptional, do triple the work in every aspect of life ESPECIALLY emotional heavy lifting to get the bare minimum when it comes to visibility or basic respect. It’s exhausting constantly expected to live up to God tier standards to be seen as valuable.
The depression I feel because I'm so inadequate!! Whew! Then you find out there's nothing wrong with how you're living. You're fine, you're enough.
Black Girl Magic is just “You have to work twice as hard to get half of what they get” repackaged.
And in the case of those wronged TikTok creators, nothing at all.
I choked at the “running on a treadmill while earning a PhD because I had a friend who ran a lot and was doing her PhD at Harvard. 😂😂😂 Cambridge is a good running city.
Someone literally called me “make believe “ cos they couldn’t process my existence. It was supposed to be a compliment but I’m like, I’m not imaginary I’m just fly and smart lol.
Omg! I had a similar experience. Was asked if I "were real or a social experiment". 🫣😑
This is how I feel about “black excellence” 🤦🏾♀️
As usual, when you show up, you show out! You have put into words so eloquently and profoundly, a situation that we as black women and girls have been struggling with…forever! I myself have recalled, rescinded and revoked my “black girl magic”at the beginning of this year and will be using all that unappreciated diligence, resourcefulness, and sometimes “unnatural” talent to serve me, myself and I. Great talk Sis, this was truly validating.
🙌🏾💯🖤
You are always so eloquent. Thank you for the Sunday morning chat.
It’s so wonderful to live in a time where we can look at history, be thankful to our parents (older generation) for doing the best they could and make healthier choices for our mind and body.
I agree with this. Black women just keep reinventing the super woman schema and I’m tired of it! There’s nothing wrong with Black women being middle class, home makers, etc.
There’s nothing mediocre about loving yourself and finding your bliss in a world that’s hostile to you. God has truly given me some peace in this regard. It’s not magic but for some of us to overcome great opposition, that kind of grace may be a little supernatural 😂
Like we are facing a lot just to live basic lives. As much as I like Michelle Obama, I don’t think her level of excellence and achievement should be the standard just to be loved and praised by our own community.
The change starts with us! Thanks for the video, agreed with you 100%
Girl, then we have these warrior women of African descent in the movies...
At my job, a woman wore a Black girl magic shirt. The boss told her she couldn't wear shirts like that because it offended some coworkers. Apparently they were upset they couldn't wear "white girl magic" shirts, so they didn't think she should have been able to wear her shirt. That woman no longer works at my job.
Over twenty years ago a black guy I was dating at the time stopped by work on his day off with a "by any means necessary" shirt on. It had a picture of Malcolm X on it. The supervisor came by and said someone was offended. From that day forward I never wore anything with any type of black messaging on it to work. It doesn't serve any purpose to call attention to yourself that way at the job.
B/c they know there’s no such thing as “white girl magic” now white girl tears and privilege, yes. They can’t do what we do 💅🏽. That’s also one of the reasons why you don’t announce your greatness especially around white women b/c they get envious and hate seeing us happy. Why can’t BW move in silence?
@@mynameispeaches if they can wear an Elvis Presley shirt... Then I could wear Angela Davis.
@@marissawilson4644 I would be shocked if most of them know who Angela Davis is. My co-workers didn't know what Junetenth was
I wish there were more people like you. I like how you are so deft at expressing the points you want to make, that you are to the point and how well considered your thoughts clearly are. I think you'd make an incredible professor. Thank you.
Thank you -- my mom is a retired teacher, so I must have been lucky enough to inherit some of her talent.
I've always taken it as a celebration of how we can make something out of little or nothing and turn it into something that is admired and coveted by others. I can see your point on how it can diminish the hard work that's been put in. But I like to think it's the process that's the magic, not just the end result!
That’s what I thought too…because obviously black women…we are mortal human beings lol I just thought it was a celebratory phrase meant to uplift us
Yeah this was cool, but just existing in this society as a BW holding our head up, and not running to cry in the employee bathroom is magic. I'm cool with the term.
I’m still cool with it as well. To other ppl it may be problematic and encourage erasure but among bw we know it’s uplifting and celebratory. I still love it.
I always felt weird about “Black Girl Magic” because it felt like it would eventually transform into a weird amalgamation of the Magical Negro and Strong Black Woman trope that has dehumanized Black persons. If you’re magical you cannot be vulnerable, fragile, make mistakes, express disappointments; the humanity that our counterparts are allowed to have….wrote this before it got right where you said this lol
Yessss
Everybody wants to be a (black) cat
Cause a (black) cat's the only cat
That knows where it's at....
Wypipo's drive to be anything else never ceases to amaze.
Black girls are so magical, we've got men like Jason Whitlock blaming us for the crimes of black men, in absentia. 🙄
Now that's magical!
I never got into that term for the same reasons you specified here. I'm 1000% for supporting US in every way possible, but there is no "magic" here, there is only continued effort, determination, problem-solving, compromise and flexibility, making due with what's within our reach, continued learning and evolving, and so on. I never liked the idea of reducing our internal AND external work to "magic".
I agree completely!
I never liked the whole black girl magic thing. Why does there have to be something fantastical about just living a good life and making things happen for yourself.
I refuse to stress myself out to be "magical" to someone else. Been there, done that. Have all the tee shirts, shot glasses, and whatnot. It's ok to live a soft life. You don't have to be everything to everybody.
"We've magic-ed ourselves into a pickle" 😆 This was spot on! It also made me feel incredibly proud to be a Black woman 👑 But I do see how the entry level to validity being "magic" can be just as harmful as the "strong Black woman" narrative. I use to start my videos describing how my artwork was inspired by Black Girl Magic. It still is and I don't mind the term, but it is starting to feel dated and co-oped. Now, I say I'm inspired by cosmic queens since I paint a lot of galactic-themed portraits of women ✨️
Wow, the privilege to be ordinary and still cared for. So well done 👌🏾Thanks for sharing!
Would love to support your art!
@@midnightbreezes Thanks so much! 💕 You know where to find me 😉
Wow! You hit that dead center...no one else needs to SPEAK!!
Don't even get me STARTED on the terms "black excellence" or "you have to work twice as hard to get half of what they got"🙄. I'm not working twice as hard as ANYONE, to only get half, fr? That's asinine. I'm a freaking human being for Christ's sake. Have people never heard of burnout? Does it not apply to black people, particularly black women?
Right??
When you goin write a book? Column? Something. Your vocabulary is stimulating and engaging and I love it. You got a forever fan ❤
EXCELLENT commentary. Happy to see younger ladies understanding this earlier than we "aunties" did. We're just now understanding how our "strength" and "magic" has caused us all manner of autoimmune disease, high blood pressure, fibroids, etc, etc.
That part about living a marvel superhero life for anyone to care about your well being hit soooo hard😣. Thanks for the great commentary!!
I love your brief critique of the "soft life". Thanks for naming what it should be. 🙏🏾
It's not over
Black Girls are Blessed
It's just some bw like to be in a lower position and don't like seeing bw being loved, celebrated and appreciated.
This video is also about masculinity and I really appreciate being seen this well.
I see your point. I see it as uplifting and will continue to use the terms since affirmation are what black women need since all they hear is hate from everywhere in this country. It should be added on to remind black women to rest, recuperate, and know that having a soft life doesn't make them less.
I have to admit the hate on being “strong” has been frustrating for me, as it automatically started a new wave of glorifying mediocrity. Although, as black women we deserve the world, we also have to be armed to survive and thrive in the world we were given… until we finally just take it over. In the interim, there has to exist a happy medium, which doesn’t equate to our dimming the light within us. As usual, thank you for your insight and wisdom.
Agree. I don't think a life of _doing nothing_ and having no life aspirations is the goal, but I also don't think we should be expected to be "magical" in the face of challenges that ought not to be thrust upon us in the first place.
Our mediocrity often still exceeds the excellence of others.
What mediocrity are you talking about exactly? I think this just varies based on life experience and who you surround yourself around.
I know millionaire black women. I know successful black women. There’s so many of us killing it but a lot of us are tired babes. Just living and thriving in a world hostile to us IS a success in my opinion.
This comment may stray slightly from the point, but this is why it’s important that we embrace what’s natural to us like out hair. We are an exclusive group by nature. They can’t take from us what they can’t replicate themselves or get from the source. Own your blackness ladies!
There’s NOTHING magical about it; we are just TALENTED! 🤩
I don't think it's magic,it's survival...
RIGHT!!! Like, can't we just be Regular AF?!?
I am! And I love it!
You are absolutely right. There is no lack girl magic. Black women are just naturally gifted in certain things. I get triggered when people say work your magic to other people. It makes us seem like we are immortal when we aren't. It's a mental illness when you think you have magical powers. There is a difference between having a special gift to having a special talent.
Thank you for this!!!! I remember not being crazy for this particular phrase but also not taking any shine away when said. I’m in my 40’s and I am learning how to tell my friends and family when I am tired or simply not interested in running myself down. Thank you for putting to words a lot of my mixed feelings on this topic.
I don’t like when black girl magic is used over a situation that required a great deal of work. It diminishes that persons accomplishments and work they put in. I feel like this “movement” doesn’t have to go away completely (like the natural hair community), certain things don’t have to be overused or taken so seriously (like hair). We are naturally talented and need to be happy at the standards we place on ourselves individually. I love the sisterhood thats being created in BWE spaces.
“Black girl magic ain’t magic, we just make it look magical”. Amen sis!! I appreciate your perspective it is much needed. We must acknowledge the blood, sweat, and tears. People tell me all the time “you are so brilliant …it was hard but at least you made it through”. But as a black woman in corporate america, every “brilliant” thing we do has a hurtful experience or encounter tied to it! But don’t nobody wanna have that conversation. Smdh. Awesome analysis here! 🔥
Yes I was just talking to a friend about this! It’s like black women achieve so much but then it’s like do we even have an option when we are only recognized when we go above and beyond? There’s no room to be basic when the standard for us is so high and unrealistic. It even makes me think of Beyoncé who is extremely talented on so many levels but we know there’s so much hard work behind it that a white female entertainer may not have to do to gain recognition and praise (and to sell). Its like there’s always a higher standard for black women to even be seen. It’s frustrating because it’s amazing what we can accomplish, but then at what cost? Theres a lot of overcompensating and extra work involved.
Whewwwww! You delivered a WORD today girl 🔥 Ive never looked at it this way but you definitely opened my eyes w this video, thank you!!
I do feel like BGM was just more excuses to force more things that BW are responsible for. Like since we are magical we have to be amazing and do everything. Like get outta here.
U said what needed to be said!!!!!🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🎯
I have guilty of saving everyone else and not saving myself. My uncle had to tell me to stop doing that
Relatable
You know, black folks have always had to be 50 shades of excellence and resourcefulness just to potentially get an invitation to the party. Let’s not even discuss the fiery hoops to jump through to get a seat at the damn table and then what’s required to actually be heard and affect real change once there. Its been damn hard work and I don’t think anyone felt like they were at fucking Hogwarts. I’m glad someone said it better than I could…we are not magic. 🤨
When being a strong black woman is your only choice you yearn for the mundane and/or to be 1st of that long list of people, situations and emergencies that need to be taken care of.
Felt this all the way in my chest!!! Thank you for putting the words to what a lot of us been feeling!!
🙌🏽♥️ Beautifully spoken, I mean I am teary eyed rn especially towards your ending statements. Black girls don’t owe anyone anything. We owe ourselves everything however, do what makes you happy and whole whenever possible ladies. 🙏🏽 Chase your joy and demand your peace, because they really do try to deny us of it. Not going at all 💅🏽💯 Thank you for your honesty always Ti ♥️💐
Thank you. I needed to see this. 🙏🏾💙💫 Grateful
This kind of content needs to be everywhere!!!!
This video is everything.. My new motto is: ‘Doing less’..
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I support this message 👏🏾😂
As always, much appreciated/well said/and on time message!!!! So Many Thanks ❣️🥰
“Black Girl Magic” was something I only briefly saw on Tumblr back in the day and never again. Hearing you explain it more in depth reminds me of other sentiments and aspirations that have come and gone like “Strong Independent Woman” or how almost every Female YA Protagonist were stoic, stone-faced bad-asses who never cried and EVERYBODY wanted every female character to be like that. I know that last part might not relate to the real world 100%, but I’m pretty sure people online were viewing IRL women through that kind of lense.
Ghetto until proven fashionable - a word
“Black Girl Magic” is just a phrase to uplift black women in a society that constantly reminds us that we ain’t s**t. Nothing more, nothing less. Just like “Black Girls Rock.” I don’t understand why some people choose to complicate things for no reason? In my opinion, those phrases made black women and girls look at themselves in a positive light for once, and forget about the constant hate we get on a daily bases.🤷🏽♀️ I guess I just have a different perspective. I also don’t understand why as black women we constantly feel the need to lessen ourselves just to make other people feel comfortable or to make other people view us as human. Saying things like “I’d rather be weak” or “I’d rather be mediocre.” That’s actually kind of sad. Honestly none of those things are going to make people view us any different because it’s our skin that offends them, and we can’t change that.🤷🏽♀️ Might as well strive to be the best version of yourself and stop worrying about what other people think. Lastly, If you need help, ask for it! Being “strong” doesn’t mean be foolish.
I totally agree.
This!!!
Because it’s not magic, it’s the exhausting overachieving to be seen as worthy. My mother would tell me (and still does) that if you’re a black woman who is not an overachiever people don’t give a shit about you. People don’t respect or celebrate you. Meanwhile certain others (you know who) aren’t held to that same standard. Some of us don’t want to be the exhausting stereotype of “strong independent” that society has put on us, because it doesn’t allow black women to be soft. Some of us just want to be normal happy women, free of all these weights and pressures people put on us. So while it may seem like an uplifting phrase, there’s a lot of behind that message that’s not talked about.
@@CrystalRose1111 once again you’re complicating things for no reason. Black girl magic doesn’t necessarily have to be about “overachievement” that’s just what you’re making it out to be. As long as you try your best that’s all that matters.🤦🏽♀️ Stop worrying about the stereotypes that society put on black women and think for yourself. You control your own narrative, not other people. Like I said, being strong doesn’t mean be foolish. As women we can be strong when we need to be and we can also be “soft” and ask for help when we need it. Who says we have to choose between the two? You’re putting yourself in a box for no reason.
@@moniquej369 I agree that you control your narrative. These are all different and valid takes on the phrase. It might not mean that to you, but calling something “magic” can over simplify and discredit real talent and hard work.
What a great talk! And such wonderful eyes! Love the "natural makeup." A way with words you got. 💙🤗🙏💯💥
Excellent work as usual.
I didn't know I needed this message. I'm thankful your video popped up on my feed. I'm tired chile 😩
Thank you for this! 🤗❤️
Another well thought out and spoken video. Thank you for your hard work and integrity.
Great hair, great shirt! And I always learn something here.
This is why I always flock to your videos. CaShawn’s vision for uplifting our resourcefulness and use for “game recognize game” has been so bastardized. Great video.
I’m so happy when you post ♥️
This was an interesting conversation and informative. I definitely get where you're coming from when u put it in context.
Love your wisdom and insight as always
You have given me a lot to think about. Never once did I stop to question what exactly is the magic and black girl magic. I think you are right in that we are doing a disservice to ourselves by not acknowledging all of the struggles that we go through to achieve these so-called magical things. I think it would do us good to show our vulnerabilities to the world and let them see when we are hurt. We need to let people know that we are human and we bleed the same as they do. I don't think it serves us to continue to act stoic and dry eyed. They only think of us as superhuman or inhuman when we take this course. My goal for 2023 is to show the humanity in me in its totality.
I liked this a lot! Thanks for sharing your thoughtful commentary!
Magic is the science of things we don't understand. As a black man who is also...a practitioner...it's incredibly satisfying to hear you break it down this way. It's magic to THEM because they don't understand how y'all do it. I see you tho. Subbed.
Excellent commentary!!! Thank you for sharing this!
Ughhhh so much gems and relatabilit here thank you❤❤❤❤❤❤
Black is beautiful but there is nothing magical about being a black girl, especially in corporate America. We have to work twice as hard to get half of what they have. Being delusional about black girl magic or “soft life” sets you two steps back. We need to grind hard always, thankfully we have the drive and we are building some of the fastest growing businesses in America.
I love your insights and your personality. And I absolutely love when you pop up on my timeline. Thank you for being amazingly you! 🥰🌻💛✨
Ahhhh, Ti~ Thanks for this. I definitely missed your witty high level content.
I feel this. I'm going back to school for nursing and I'm taking the traditional 4 year bachelor. My older sister means well when she asked why I didn't just do the accelerated 12 month BA > BSN. Just because I can get my BSN super quickly, doesn't mean I should. I don't want to put extra stress on myself
I needed this video; thank you!
Every time I watch you , I cry a little. Keep being you. 💓
I'll just say that this video came at a good time for me. Thank you.