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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 ก.ย. 2024
- Just some thoughts about unmarried Chinese women and men, about the society, your life won`t end when you turn 30, 40, 50, 60...Comment and share whatever you feel like sharing with me, you are very much welcomed in my Channel!
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tags-Chinese women- Chinese culture- leftover women- leftover men- Chinese marriage- Chinese dating- asian women- living in China- Chinese girl- Chinese family
Being unmarried does not mean you are unable to love or to be loved, you can still enjoy this life journey as others, just without that piece of paper. Sometimes you may stay with someone for years, even have children with them yet remain unmarried...Does it really matter? What`s more, not all marriages last forever. Make sure to love yourself first, then love others. (Just let you know that I DO read each comment, and thanks for sharing your life experience&opinions with me❤❤However I can`t reply to all of them, I`m not famous enough to hire an assistant yet ok, so don`t get grumpy and thanks for your support lovely people xx)
😁🤣🤣🤣🤣
You wasted your child birthing years and now expect the ideal wealthy man. How selfish.
I love your video
Interesting perspective. I have heard several video's on this subject, especially ones by China Dating sites. The massive male outnumbering female is a interesting phenomena, vs Russia where women wound up outnumbering men due to wars. That resulted in men thinking they are worth more. The monogamy in China also plays a factor in the situation, as reports I hear say there is cheating on both side of the relations.
I want to thx you for this,all we do or think is belive the media now days ,people need to know the mind is not black and white but there a raison for every action we make or do,life is awareness no path just like consciousness .again thx you my lady
I dated a divorced Chinese American woman for 2 years - She treated me like CRAP - She was just after my money - Maybe I'll go to the Philippines to find a GOOD Woman who truly cares about me. - Just my Honest Opinion
It’s not about Chinese women, it’s just about her as an individual.
True it's just about the individual
😂😂😂Philliphhinnes is the botom barrel of Asia, is all transactional relationships, they can pull out a knife easily in an argument, is just in top 3 worst woman in Asia to date.
At least if a chinese ,vietnamese,indian,paki, thai woman dont like you at least they let you know but filipina can stay with you even they dont like you, and suck you dry and very sneaky people
@@JoMoon Most Chinese AND American women worship money. If people do not worship God, then they worship money.
As a Black American man, I appreciate your work. You videos speaks on subjects that people may get sensitive about, but you are just delivering the facts. Keep up the great work.
Bro, I am black too but I don't know why your comment had to point out your race though...
@@contezw supposedly out black men got upset with her in her previous video when she mentioned that Black men are not generally desired from Chinese women which is fact. Can black men, still get Chinese women, yes but most mainland Chinese women idolize white skin.
@@contezw That's exactly what I was thinking.
@@clistens3368 White will always be most preferred everywhere, that's facts! I have dated 2 Chinese women now and I have a lot of Chinese female friends yet I'm black as a mofo and worse, not even from the USA (black African actually). People forget that though she is speaking truth, life experiences are always actually different depending on your personality whether black or white 😂😂. China is still learning about black people they know nothing about us such that a friend of mine born in France was asked how he is black but from France? Would most Chinese women choose me over a white dude based on looks? DEFINITELY NOT! but how do they choose me over Chinese men and other white foreigners? They realise that my personality has nothing to do with my colour. If they see that you're comfortable in your skin, it becomes less of an issue for them making you just another guy that has to pass the fundamentals of what ticks her "boyfriend material'' boxes which most usually are: confidence, style, career, language barrier, romantic, family value (it's really important to push to know her family early on if you want to have any success keeping her) and of course, money! Afterall, money is what makes white people most preferred because they come from successful wealthy countries. In many Chinese books, they refer to Africans as "black brothers" so unless you learn the culture and language and expect to be on an equal footing with whites based on looks alone then your odds become way slimmer to nearly impossible. Remember there are close to 183 million women between 20 and 35 so unless you're a player I think you probably only need to find one right? White will always be preferred but you need to make yourself desirable. You have to give her valid reasons why she should choose you over other guys which is a simple rule that applies to all women regardless of race anyways albeit the chances of her not even looking at you because you're black are high...
th-cam.com/video/8vFfR0HS9f4/w-d-xo.html
Perspective brother...
same thing as here in usa, we just call it hitting the wall. and it usually happens around 35 years old here. But here they find themselves in that position because of choices they made throughout their younger years, rather it be career , partying, multiple children with multiple men, whatever ever the situation it happens. Of course we have very different laws on marriage and more frequently people are just living together rather than get married.
The wall is undefeated brother
In my heart to heart conversation with older ladies who chosen singlehood, I found that it was their greatest regret. After all, it is not pleasure and enjoyment and achievements (or pain for that matter), but love and duty that define our life meaning.
In the Western world, women are not called leftover, some of them have children out of wedlock and live to see their grandchildren, at least.
Women are fulfilled in a different way than men. Women get very little joy in career accomplishment. Men are motivated to work hard for a family. There isn’t a single woman alive that is working hard on a job to supper a husband to stay…not one.
You are a great sense of humour and thank you for educating us about these topics.
Best way to deal with haters at the start. We'll done Jo. It's their problem not yours. Love your content ❤
In med school I dated some of the 2nd type. They were bright and independent. The downside is that a girl who cherishes independence may not inherently value marriage as much as one who prioritized family earlier in life. I know many brilliant girls from around the world with great degrees but many are not very “nurturing.”
Jo Moon wow! Your delivery of the topic is attractive, your thoughts and silent humor is refreshing; my attention is is captured 💐
Jo, your insights into modern China is the best I have seen on youtube. Please keep posting.
🙏
@@JoMoon I would love to see a special on Beijing and Shanghai...the situation there is considerably more 'advanced'
Thank you for your candid remarks
In the 21st Century, all people should live the lifestyle that suits them. "To thine own self be true" - W. Shakespeare.
Hey Jo Moon. I bumped into your channel about a week ago and couldn't stop watching your content. I think I've seen all your videos by now. You have really giving me great insight into Chinese culture. Thank you for sharing.
It's interesting that in so many cultures, women tend to be the ones to have the negative label attached to them.
I'll add that I'm really happy that your channel is growing very quickly. When I followed you, last week, your channel was less than half its size. That's really exciting.
Thank you so much Ken, your words mean a lot to me. I’m grateful to have you guys on this journey. Take care of yourself ok:))
Very interesting discussion. Thank you.
You don’t have the heart to call a woman leftover. But you have the heart to call men leftover and low quality.
Very informative and well throughout out video Jo. Women the world over are outpacing men. As a man that is high achieving and respects other high achieving people, it is news I love to hear. Sadly, many men are entitled, complain and choose to remain mediocre instead of stepping up.
As such, I have cut some men out of my life since I don't want that toxicity around me. I think the modern test will be that if men that date high achieving women or have the option to tend to not want to befriend a guy, then it's a sign that those men are low quality. Why would a woman want to deal with you if a guy doesn't even want to be your friend? Food for thought.
What makes high achieving women different for high achieving men? These men aren't gold diggers, that's not their goal.
High achieving people in general typically want their high achieving counterpart in a relationship, professional life and social life.
I don't want to date a poor woman with low education or have to make sacrifices to encounter that at work or in friends.
I want the mother of my children to be a successful person and role model. Birds of a feather flock together. @@LiangHou-l2n
It's seems so strange that the women are so out numbered but yet still there are unmarried women who probably wish to be married.
I love your videos and following your comments I want to try and understand the chinese philosophy kind regards and thank you 😊
Good episode, Jo. Quite insightful. I find the whole 'leftover', 'unwanted' labels a bit harsh...
I'm a black man living in England and I'd rather married a Chinese/Asian woman than a western/black woman.
Oh,lol,so true. They have an attitude and are loud 😅
It’s difficult to stand up to family when they want you to do something - I think unmarried women in China deserve respect
I would be considered left over and im grateful that i have a Chinese girlfriend who would also be considered as such by many in China. We will be getting married soon and now she will have more security as well as my retirement, life insurance and social security when i pass away and she deserves it. She is the hardest worker i have ever seen and cares for me with love and devotion. She speaks English fairly well and I'm learning Mandarin. I wrote her a love letter in Mandarin unfortunately it didn't translate as well as I thought. she looked at me and smiled and then started laughing. Not the reaction I was looking for. 😂
Thanks for the explanation and classifications. Another very informative video!
interesting and informative, thank you!
Good and insightful video. Everyone should be free to choose but, they will have to face the consequences of their choices. I was happily married but, my wife died from a tick disease, 2 weeks before our 39th anniversary.
We had both given up on dating when I stopped and fixed her broken bike. It took two more meetings before we had some long conversations and realized that we belonged together. Never give up.
So sorry for your loss🙏
@@JoMoon Thank you. I like to think that I was very lucky to have her. I still get to remember the good times and adventures we had. Good Luck, Rick
Hello I'm an old idiot, I have a Chinese girl friend, I love her, she doesn't show me any love whatsoever, I don't want to leave her because I love her
What a pity 🙁
I think that the younger Chinese generations are pushing against the extreme filial piety thing. Very informative, thank you for your insights!
I just realized Im dating a "leftover woman". She's nice, the Chinglish is awkward, but otherwise, couldn't be happier
to be honest here in the US (West) I believe that AI will be replacing many of these women that have riduculous standards and thinking within the next 10 years. Japan is already experimenting with this as well to replace their leftover women as men are sick and tired of them....
very fair and clear perspective. It is education that has transform women. She has a backbone and financial standing and decides for herself.
She may be happy now but eventually her parents will die. Possibly the money will run out. What would they do then?
Fantastic videos! Very discerning, very useful and...very funny! l am Portuguese and l married a lady from Nanning! She is what the Chinese society call ''leftover woman''! 52 years old, divorced, a teenager daughter! She is extremely beautiful, but the most important thing is the fact that she is a fantastic woman, the best l ever knew! Thank you, Xiaoping, l love you madly!!!!!!!!
That’s lovely
I'm not even sure how I stumbled onto this channel but wow, are you really intelligent.
it's all about not being emotionally hurt.
Only one requirement. Be better than me at everything.
I love Your Channel. Thank You very much.
I wouldn't choose a leftover woman! WHY? They have chosen to not be a mother, especially if they choose to marry in their 40's!
One thing I find interesting is how Chinese and American women are in similar states. In the US we blame feminism but feminism isn't exactly the same in China. In China there's a pretty long history of the state promoting women entering the workforce. Basically trying to get women to work like men had been. All for economic gain. In the US it was feminism that mainly pushed women to work and "be the same as men".
So this leaves me reducing my view of feminism being the problem. If everyone in the world wants higher and higher wealth it's going to mean everyone working harder and harder. That leaves very little time or energy for relationships. Something will have to change, or maybe if we stay on this path population will fall and that will cause change. I just don't see how we can pursue ever higher wealth and some kind of full relationship life with kids. Just not enough hours in the day.
Very good point of view
This is an interesting, informed analysis. This reminds me that I had an older Chinese GF from HK and she had had a grandmother who had been in a traditional Chinese arranged marriage, and who was by her account very happy. Her husband was devoted and treated her very well. By all accounts a highly successful marriage.
Bingo!!!!!
Call them independent women, its disheartening to know that they are being called "left over"
By doing "quite all right" what do you mean? Living is not about acquiring ever increasing buying power.
Living is about the unfoldment of the power to love others beyond loving oneself.
These "leftover women" suffer from immaturity, stunted growth. The same can be said for "leftover males."
@@ActiveAussie2024 What does the word independent mean to you in the context here?
There are many double standards in these videos. If a man is leftover it is because he is low quality. If a woman is leftover it’s because she is so brave and intelligent. Maybe things are just much different in China than USA, because she really seems to not like men.
As a woman, if you are living a happy life, you owe it to yourself to put up with the comments and just do what is best for you. On the other side of that equation are those of us in the older generations who were indoctrinated into the idea that if your children aren't in a stable/married relationship, they can't be happy and we worry. In those cases, it's really tough to keep your mouth shut. However, we do learn, even if it's slowly..I have 3 granddaughters who make sure I know I'm old-fashioned and how to change my ways...lol
You are quite up to date actually haha
There is nothing wrong with women being leftover women because leftovers are good, I know this because I eat leftovers all the time and they actually taste really good because leftovers women are not the same as spoiled women or expired women or out of date women or contaminated women or intoxicated woman.
With so many more men than women in China. These statistics are surprising.
ignore the hates hun these video's are enlightening and I enjoy knowing about other cultures rather than the norm we are used too. love ya girl :)
I am 44 years old. I am not married. Does this make me a low quality man?
… if the women chose career over marriage, maybe the women have more control over a relationship than you think…
I know this was a year ago, but you crack me up @JoMoon
Happy new year Ms have a wonderful one 🎇
They wanted to remain single. Not much else to it.
I like your information. Thanks for keeping it real.
Thanks for sharing
Love the channel Jo Moon . Thank You.
Hello Ms Moon, My opinion of Chinese " Left Over Women " is that each and every one is better than I deserve! Thankyou so much for this video
I feel so disgusted and heartbroken from hearing and seeing this
Now that women have entered the educational and workplaces in mass it has change to social and personal dynamic between men and women in almost every country. More women are choosing not to marry. The irony and contradiction of it all is a woman's most prized achievement and asset is her family ( a husband with children) . The family unit is a woman's ultimate stability witnessing in real time her children growing and becoming successful productive adults. In my opinion once this is removed from women all you have is " wanderers" looking for the next best thing. A wandering spirit is never happy. Usually the regrets are felt in old age . Thanks for the great video.
It's more other way around. Man need Family
chinese leftovers just need 2 mins in a microwave.
The only way I would marry again here in the West where the divorce laws are against the men...is with an iron clad and air tight pre-nuptual agreement. Othewise, I would just have a severence package/pay agreement and no wedding....
if women r single and happy who will bury her in old age ? no grandson lol
I found that it is a rude expression callling them leftovers , i would say instead they are ''S'' womens...Super, Sensible, Sensual Sweet, Strong, Serene Singles. 😊
And "S"exy 😌
It is better to be a Single, than to be married but with misserable life.
First. Thank you for this informative video. Jo Moon mentions three categories of Chinese women who may or may not be interested in marriage. I was not really aware of the first category of Chinese women who are supported by their parents through life. It seems like such a waste. It also seems selfish. The second category of Chinese women is more interesting. It is this category that is more familiar. They are accomplished women who are single for a variety of reasons. Often they age out under the traditional Chinese viewpoint or are divorced from their Chinese husband. Divorce is a stigma in China for women. It is this group who sometimes goes overseas to find a husband from a culture which doesn't stigmatize divorce. I've seen such women living fulfilling lives in the US. Sometimes such accomplished women come to California for a time in order to receive in vitero treatment which is unavailable in China because the Chinese Govt. won't permit unmarried women to receive such treatment. It seems like there may occasionally be an overlap between the second and third categories. The third category of Chinese women lack the wealth of the first category and the accomplishments of the second category. Their struggles must often be overwhelming.
👍
Well-summarized account of Jo’s three types, which I feel is accurate, living in China for a long time myself.
Nurturing and caring is natural and biological necessity for women, what happens this days is we are living through the first generations of women who massively will live alone with no biological kids until their last day in earth, some of them they will adopt, which is pretty good as solution, but those who never wanted to have kids, and decide to live "well" and comfortable without the headache of raising kids those will regret very badly once they are too old to even to find a partner in life, and you cannot tell me that your degrees makes you wiser than your parents or your grand parents, we are living the delusion of modern materialistic society so right now women think they will be fine without a family and children for their rest of their life as their grandmother did, but it takes time to understand what really matters in life and that is why when the parents get old then they always encourage their offspring to get married and have kids because that's the sole purpose of life, so if you have siblings and thus they have kids and you don't have then is not a big deal, but if you are a woman from the one kid time who doesn't want to get married and have kids then is very probable that the whole line of your ancestors will vanish in time like ashes in the wind because your ancestors live through you and will remain alive through your kids, that's the most beautiful thing a woman can have is being called grand mother because there is no career who will remember your name and how you look, like the grand children always remember their grand parents.
But in China the things are more complicated like that, Japan they have a huge demographic problem knocking their door due to modern, strong and independent women, and the problem with this approach is women assume we as men should find attractive the same traits that they find attractive on a man, but is not, so when they don't want a family and nobody wants them they said "oh the men, their ego cannot deal with a independent woman..." well is partially true, if they are so independent then why in the heek want a man, for what? back to the Chinese demographic, the strength for China to remain as the fastest growing economy remains in their population, if not look what is going on in Europe, and US, they have those policies of tolerance about illegal immigration because the elites they know the born rates is too low and the only way to prevent a demographic issue in future is bringing immigrants who want to live a have kids in their "new country" if that will solve the problem or make it worse I don't know because I can't tell the future (yet) so if China keeps the same path with strong and independent women who don't want to start a family then eventually the government will have to apple a policy of 10 children per marriage trying to solve the future demographic issue...
Have you notice how older and single women suddenly they always want to have pets, cats or dogs? but no, they don't need to start a family...
What up Jo. Moon!!!
Thank you for all that you bring
We prefer young woman then old woman with experience
Would you pick an Orange from the bottom of the basket.
Women are never single by choice...for long. Hit the wall
your videos are very informative, really shows the marrige sitatuion in china is pretty much the same in the rest of the world, a lot of it sounds like the same brand of feminisim but with justified reason for women wanting better, then there mothers generation.
Thank you
Are divorced chinese woman considered as a left over woman too in China?
I love Chinese women ❤
Takes courage for both men and women in China to fight against the very old gender role model stereotypes. Maybe in the future Chinese will follow their own free will and not conform to type, ignore their parents pestering and the state’s dictat on how to be a ‘good’ Chinese,
I like left overs. Yes you see that sometimes woman who have good jobs some prefer to be alone . Christians believe evenly yoked people should be together. Means you should have a Christian wife.
I think, stories of real happiness probably never are about quality men or women (who knows), but maybe about 2 people who had the luck or willingness to look past perfection, and let the love into their hearts. Who knows.
Is it about love, or just about being comfortable. You may not see it before your 90, or before it is time, but without a partner (humans seem to tend to be social creatures), are you really sure to not be missing something? Maybe don't settle for "conventions", but I do think a heart without a partner is less overspilling, even if it is comfortable.
Only a stereotype because of long held cultural beliefs. Each person alive should be free to choose what they do in life. At least stigmas are falling away for the most part!
They sound amazing to me...
Not left over
Where can I go and Find a Chinese woman to marry?
Don't start complaining when you can't getting in a relationship or get married when you're in your 30s 40s and 50s men don't want leftovers
What is the divorce rate in China?
In western countries, it's hovered about 50% for several decades.
If you don’t have haters, you aren’t poppin!😂
Men don't want those qualities.
Guess what? Nobody cares if you are married or not. Why do you bother to make a video, or a documentary? Don't make it such a fuss. We don't care.
marriage (IMHO) is overrated. if they are happy with what they have, more power to them!
"Leftover women" is an awful term to address someone...😟
I think it's perfectly fine to stay single. However, she has no one to take care of her when she's old and gray. And can't cook? That's basic life skill no matter your relationship status.
The main thing is to make sure you are able to take care of yourself I agree.
Anyone can learn to cook a few dishes, at least. You don't have to be a gourmet chef.
I respect your feelings about the term “leftover women,” but you are failing to address why this term seems offensive in the first place. Also, you started the video with unbiased information and turned it into a subjective persuasive essay. I do not know if you are not seeing the big picture by choice, or because you are parroting what others have said because it aligns with your personal feelings.
A good insight of the truth in our chinese culture.
I ate breakfast this morning.
China and America have the same vision of life
To be honest, the "left-over" are deeply respected from my point of view. These brave, and older women are most desirable.
If you want a weak young woman - you are silly.
There is a similar phenomenon in Japan
Just don't raise the List of standards so high or long that no man will ever be able to complete the list.
over 50% of American men aged 16 to 45 have opted out of marriage , cohabitation , and children. as the risks are far to great.
Just ask Japan and South Korea. With the current birthrate in China your country will cease to exist in about 175 years.
I died of laughter when she quickly disclosed she wasn't part of the alphabet crew. Hahaha wasn't sure why she felt the need but I am sure in her culture such women can be viewed as lesbianz
....by the way I'm not lesbian at 650 had me cracking up. Dead pan delivery right on the money
China women is gorgeous
She and she's not her and hers.
Good ❤
I would think that the second type of woman would be a great match for a foreigner.
In America they become Massague Terapis or men Terapis good Massague
Narrative by shengnu herself 😅