My son was 19 when he got lymphoma, (in 2020, right when Covid hit). After his first round of chemo he came home and was immediately back in hospital. He had congestive heart failure, multi organ failure, got c-dif, and other not so nice things. Because of Covid there were no visitors allowed but they made a special exception for me because my son was so sick. Every day they asked him several times if they should take heroic measures with him or if he wanted to be DNR. Every time he said heroic measures. When he couldn't answer I gave his answer. They did have to take those measures once, and today, three years later, he is cancer free and has been for two years.
I'm so so sorry your son had lymphoma I have T-Cell lymphoma it's in "holding pattern " right now its a kind tht never really goes away wht kind did your son have ??? If you don't mind it's scary to walk around with a compromised immune system I've had covid 3 times 2 times with pneumonia it's because I was a nurse and refuse to go to hospital tht I haven't been admitted I've gone to E.R clinic and touched it at home I wish you the best
The daughter of the lady with cancer couldn’t let go . She needed to give her mom her wish . You can see it in her eyes she was tired and wanted to go.
This precious mother and daughter with cancer... My daughter age 33 called me one night... and said 'Mom, I have cancer... And then in a totally different voice said... 'I need my mommy'. I went. And we fought. And ultimately I never left her until after she'd taken her last breath. It was the most horrifying experience of my life... but it was also the most beautiful and precious time as well. I will be ever grateful I had those days and that I could be there for her. I send them love and pray for their peace. Rest in Peace Miss Josephine, and my prayers for your family. Mothers and daughters. Precious...
How wonderful of a mom you are to have been there for your daughter. I know she loved you dearly for being there for her.🥰🩷 I know how your daughter felt wanting her mommy around. I’m 62 and I’m going for a double bypass open heart surgery soon and besides my mom not being here, the one I thought would be here if anything went wrong with me was my husband, but he passed away three years ago(2021). I have my two adult sons which I’m so grateful for, but I still feel alone. My mom took care of me all her life, but especially when I turned to type one diabetic at nine years old. After giving my needle back then(1971) she nearly passed out on the bed until she was used to it. We always had a deep relationship talking every single day of our life on the phone and when we received the call that she had passed away(2017) I was devastated. Then when my husband suddenly passed away, I was in such shock because I had just seen him laughing with the neighbour across the street and a half hour later he was pronounced dead. Now I’m going to go in and have this operation and I’m so afraid. It’s the first operation that I’m honestly afraid of having. It’ll be my 22nd operation and then I have a hand operation afterwards or it could be before I go in for my heart operation. I’m hoping that I can get some of my life back because I have no energy right now but I’m hoping and praying that everything goes OK. Take care. 🥰🥰🩷🩷
Thank you for being such an amazing mommy. When I was dealing with the begining stages of cervical cancer it would have been amazing if my mother could have held my hand and assured me it was going to be ok. As she said it, "it's not even serious cancer yet"
My goodness the daughter needed to have a DNR discussion before she got to this point. My family has had this discussion. If your family has not had this talk please do not wait. It is easier on everyone if they know it is your choice and they do not feel like you’re killing you.
My 85 yr old Mother who was diagnosed with stage 4 Acute Myeloid Leukemia had the hospital put a wristband on her that said DNI/DNR before any of us got to the hospital so we didn't have to make that decision. She also put it in writing, and I promised to honor whatever she chose for her life. Once we realized this was an aggressive form of cancer and the chemo was no longer working I brought my Mom home to die in her own house surrounded by those she loved. We had her for 2 weeks before she passed away two months ago. She wanted to go out with dignity and grace. At 85 she had earned it, and we had to be strong enough to follow through because we loved her so much. She was my best friend, and the grief is still strong. The void it left is still to big to fill, but each day I am celebrating her every single day to lessen the pain and fill the void.
I can feel this so deeply. I'm sorry for your loss. We had a similar situation with my papa. He had voiced he didn't want to keep trying to fight the cancer after many attempts and failures. We had him a month before he passed peacefully in the bed he loved and house he had been the king of. We got as much time as we needed to say goodbye which was so nice.. no machines no other people to rush is to make room for another patient.
I am still saddened to see so many people who will not let their terminally ill family members die with dignity because it will make THEM sad . Real love knows when to let go .
Wow. I lost my mom to lung cancer in 2004. Her illness was FAST. We were all together on diagnosis day, so some quick decisions were made, and 2 weeks later my mom moved into our home. Being with her daughter and grand kids in those final days was exactly what she needed. We laughed a lot and I think she had a blast, to be honest. She didn't suffer at all, she wasn't in pain, and she was with us for all of 3 weeks before she passed away. Thank GOD for Hospice. I couldn't have done it without them, they're marvelous. And my mom got to be where she wanted to be, at her daughters home, and that's what mattered most of all.
I feel bad for Josephine’s daughter but she needs to accept that her mom needs and I think wants to go. The hardest thing I did was tell my 42 year old husband that it was okay to go but I am glad I got the courage to ease his mind before he died in peace. Brought back memories. Emotional episode.
Sometimes they need that. My dad (he was only 53) didn't want my sister to see him go, because she would have been irrevocably broken. So he waited until I took her home and told him, "I took Kimber home dad... it's okay, you can let go." And he did 15 minutes later. It's hard, but they need that affirmation.
Mum has accepted her fate. The daughter has yet to do that. She is already going through the stages of grief - denial and anger being two of them. She is not even willing to acknowledge that her mother is, in her own words, „on the way out“. Daughter reacts angry, brushes her remark aside and won’t even allow any talk about what will come. I cannot really fault her for it…she is literally not in her right mind at the moment.
My Mum died from lung cancer that went to her brain. We live in the US. No doctor had that convo with my Mum. They didn't even tell us it was terminal. They push so hard to keep people alive in this country when they shouldn't. And I get it. Families don't want to talk about it,so doctors approach it with kid gloves or not at all. Bless that doctor.
My husband died from lung cancer as well but in reality the medication killed him first. It's poison what they use and he agreed to it all. I'm not sure I would but thankfully I've not been asked to make that decision.
The first thing my husband doctor asked me was where his was. Then I asked can you do anything. Chemotherapy radiation. Then after a few treatment I asked if it was better they told me no. Stage 4. I spoke with my husband he signed the DNR. After my Dad died of cancer we learned to ask a lot of question.
@@xyz12345457 Nor mine. The staff was so great. They did however have me talk to her about signing a DNR but the nurse was right there with me. My mom battled for 10 months. The last 2 weeks were spent at her home where she passed peacefully with almost all of her children around her. It's been 12 years and I remember it like it was yesterday.
When the doctor pounded on Dad's heart and brought him back I asked him how long he had from his skin cancer and he said 6 months.I took him every Saturday for Father daughter days until the last Saturday when he died. I took him for 8 months.He was so excited for those Saturdays he would get up at 4am .It was wonderful and showed him how I loved him.
I’m so glad Josephine got to go home and that her pain is now gone. I can’t imagine how awful it would be to feel like you couldn’t do something as simple as breath. You cannot expect your loved ones to stay for you… you need to let them go with God.
I know my nephew is an ER nurse and the one thing he stressed was that his Nana, my mother and his mother’s mother, would sign a DNR. We lost her to prolonged dementia last Summer, and he had a horror of them trying to resuscitate her at her age. She was 93. He said when you resuscitate an elderly person like that you do so much more harm than good, most times when you do CPR their bodies take such a beating in that effort of trying to bring them back, if you do they almost never recover. Thankfully, that did not happen.
I lost both parents. Now, though in my 50s, I will be getting a DNR and life saving measures. Just let them go. Don't make them feel like they are guilty for dying. This is life. Love is hard, love is long, love makes us strong.
Thank you for saying that. I hate thinking that very sick and dying people feel guilty for that which they cannot control. It makes their last emotions/memories (and more so the surviving loved ones) stressful and unpleasant.
The lady with cancer said so much with just her face. No matter how many people are supporting you in the end there is a part of it you go through yourself. I feel for her.
Kim, the Nurse Practitioner, is tops! She's that aunt or great-aunt that loves you like a mom and will take care of you, but she will also have a laugh at you, at herself, or hold you while you cry. Just a sweet, caring generous person. 😇🥰
I lost my mother in law to lung cancer in April 2018 - just 6 weeks after her diagnosis. We told her that we wanted her here but understood if she didn’t want to fight anymore. It makes me sad that Josephine’s friends/family pushed her when she was clearly happy with her life & ready to move into the next one ❤️
My Dad died at 50 from a very rare cancer that was in his chest wall, then near his heart, and in his left lung. It was a tough 2 yrs watching him slip away, become weaker... broke my heart and I miss him every single day. 💔 But, there came a point he was so tired it was time. He came home, our family came, his coworkers came, and we all stayed with him. My mom held his hand until the end. He died 4 days after coming home from the hospital. We had hospice nurses and comfort care. It was exactly how he wanted to go.
I think Josephine's daughter got very stuck in her carer role which was why it was so hard for her to let go, it's hard enough when it's your parents, but when you are also the one who takes care of them, it makes it more difficult. I hope she has found her peace in her mother's passing and knows she did everything she could to care for her loved one.
Whatever Portuguese I’ve learned that as well, it doesn’t make a difference, but it’s just to me. It shows a powerful bond between people that extends much further than language
The day before I brought my mama to my home for hospice care I got into a tiff with the nurse at the hospital. She had stopped breathing during the night before and I could not understand why they wanted to release her. I knew she had a DNR. I knew her medical history and that she was near the end but I just could NOT get it straight in my head. I was so stupid, and crazy sad. I eventually went back and apologized to the nurse. I think it's a pretty normal reaction. I had all the information I needed but wasn't ready to accept the truth of the moment. The nurse was incredibly kind...thank goodness. My mama passed away 3 weeks later with me beside her , holding her hand, and singing "you are my sunshine". It is breathtakingly hard to lose your mama.
Both my parents who died exactly 17 yrs and 1 week from each other both passed at home with the four kids . Grandkids went in after they passed to say something ...when dad died he had five grandkids and one on the way. When mom died she had six grandkids and 11 great grands. She was the best.
We lost our daughter from cancer a few months ago. The end was awful until she allowed them to keep her comfortable. We watched her take her last breath. She looked just like the mom here, when she went into the hospital the last time.
I won’t forget Josie’s family, and I won’t forget Josie…I felt the heart felt love the family had, hated to see this one go 😢and daughter was right, her mom was stunning, breathtaking, just so very beautiful and the eyes …omgoodness, gorgeous! I’m so sorry for your loss!
I hope to leave soon (borrowing a euphemism to be P/C) and I can only hope that I meet lovely, professionals like these. In an odd way, you've given me a measure of hope. Thank you. RIP Josephine. 💗
13 cats is quite the inheritance... As hard as it is, it's good that Josephine was well enough to have a say in her care. My grandfather had dementia and it was my mother and aunt who had to make the DNR decision. It's very hard to make that decision as you are looking at your parent who's still alive and you're having to sign papers to agree for them to die when it comes to that. Despite his dementia and his not remembering any of us or his carers, he was kind and funny to everyone.
Josie’s situation with her cancer and watching her daughter and their relationship with each other was the exact same cancer, situation ie infection and the same relationship as mum and daughter. My mum passed way too early at 72 and I was 47 in September 3rd 2023 (4 months ago). It’s simply heartbreaking and causes complete heart ache. What a brave woman, just like my mum. Sorry to the family for Josie’s loss. Xxx
I'm a retired nursing assistant. I watch these as I miss my job. I must say that the quality of care your team gives and the compassion shown to patients is above and beyond.
As a guy, I do have long hair currently and I’ve always been terrified of losing it, but watching this shows me, it’s such a like who cares about it at the end of the day
My mom died last year from emphysema and a tumor on her heart. They didn't take measures and even talk about it. She died alone in the nursing home she was supposed to rehab in. 2 days before my birthday. My son is 17 and I have already had that discussion with him and my husband. We r in the U.S.
You can never die with dignity. It's always sad, painful and not pretty. But if someone wants to shorten their suffering you have to respect their decision even though it's hard for you. We shouldn't make people live just for our emotional comfort.
I was diagnosed with a malignant melanoma cancer on my back nearly a year ago I’m still taking treatments of Keytruda for it now. I was transferred to the same facility but closer to my home so me and my wife didn’t have such a long trip to get treatments every 6 weeks. The new doctor she told me I have to take another years worth of treatments and a mri I had showed a 9mm spot on my brain and the front of my brain showed I’d been having migraines which I have been having lately. Nobody has actually told me if the cancer is gone I lost 9 lymph nodes to in the surgery to remove the cancer so far. I know what it’s like to have the skin doctor call and he said Randle I’ve got bad news. My heart sank that morning and it’s not come up yet. I’m praying for everyone that has cancer Amen 🙏.
I had a scare - possible lung cancer - and my mom came. Then the real thing struck. Breast cancer, triple negative. Mom came, as soon as I could handle her. I didn’t want her here during the barfing pArt of chemo but the next phase I definitely wanted her and she was so helpful, besides being supportive. It is hard “giving up” on someone. I am a retired nurse so I can understand that feeling and the fact that you aren’t really giving up on the, you are giving them the best life they can have at the end of their life IF that is what they choose. Love you Mom.
I'm literally crying so much watching this video. It is so very hard to know that a loved one is dying, but it's worse when you visit a loved one and he has been deceased a few days, my husband, I didn't get a chance to tell him ' I love you '.
I'm going soon to make my will with my husband. We will set up our specific medical wishes and medical POA so we have no worries about what the other wants. Will have the papers filed with our local hospitals and our doctors offices. Don't leave it for your people to try and sort out then worry they made a bad choice.❤
I agree Cindy. My husband (51)spent the last 18 months in the hospital. I was relieved for him that he wasn't in pain anymore. But I understand her pain one min she's there for her mom 24/7 and the next it's over. That's the pain I really felt
The daughter was terrified of losing her, she couldn't accept the reality at that point. Having been in that situation with may dad, I can see where she was coming from.
Personally I struggle watching people not be able to let go of ill loved ones although I understand. Neither of my parents allowed me to be there when they passed. I know they didn’t think I would have been okay with it but I believe, even more so, they may have struggled to let go. Still, the most beautiful gift, in my opinion, is getting to hold their hand as they transition. None of us get out of this alive. Just wish I could have been with them. 💜
This is a question mom and I discussed a few years before it came to that point. I am glad as found I had cancer 2 years before she died. We were in agreement both said no. Let us go. We both had to make the decision for our husbands and then to tell the doctor to take them off the machines. I lived with her the last 5 years of her life. So I am alone now and my kids live in other states. Talk with people beforehand and don't wait.
My mother died of complications of diabetes. Her kidneys had failed (common in long-term diabetics) & her heart stopped while she was on dialysis. That was the 2nd time it had happened & after the first time, she'd signed a DNR. We knew she was terminal & I supported the decision. I'd do the same. Let me go, leave behind this broken body!
Here in Australia, the wait in A&E is about the same as the UK. We have the same urgency points system as the NHS. But the beauty of our system and the NHS is that no one asks about insurance and fees. Everyone gets the best treatment as possible, but in the UK you tend to get referred back to your GP. In Australia you are referred to a clinic in the hospital and also their own rehab. The other thing is that in Australia your medical records are on a centralised government database called MyHealthRecord. This is accessible to any doctor or hospital in the country in real time. In my case my records go back on the system to 1972. Every test, every GP visit, every accident, every scan or XRay, every immunisation. Its all there, and the system uses AI to pick a trend or change that may not be visible in paper records. Illnesses are treated sooner and treatment is consistent.
It is tough but important and empathetic to remember that the person who is terminal and dying is saying goodbye to everyone they know. Those of us who are not dying yet are saying goodbye to one person. The burden to be in a dying body AND say goodbye to everyone is likely enormous. Why compound that difficulty and severe stress for the dying person by scolding them into a false "fight for it" momentary recovery?
My Grandma had a brain tumor and went into hospice and my mom wouldn’t let me go because I was pregnant with my first baby and she died, miss my grandma so much.
Like personally to me, I have taken a long time to grow mine out and everything like that but watching that woman, I don’t know to me. It just said like there are things that are far more precious.
As hard as it is family members need to give their loved ones the ok to go to sleep permanently and to be at peace. I’ve had to do it with both my parents so I know
I understand the daughter not wanting her mom to give up. But sometimes people are ready to go. It’s so difficult to accept but the patients’ wishes need to be respected.
Cancer is never good it sometimes makes us stronger in dealing with major issues in our lives...I have always felt if people made the decisions regarding their end of life wishes when they're younger then it takes the burden off of those that have difficulty making those decisions for their loved ones. Resuscitating an older person is putting trauma upon trauma and how they come out of it if they do prolongs the their suffering imo...many people don't like to talk about death and most doctors when the person is being admitted will ask their status for that admission. Josephine doesn't want to let her daughter down.
Josephine's daughter is a control freak. Can't stop for a second to think what her mother has been through or wants, only what she thinks is best. Bossing everyone and every situation. Glad Josie can rest in peace now.
Josephine's daughter not only inabled her mother with her own OCD but is a solid peiece of ice. She is very cold the way she speaks to her mother, partner, & own daughter
The lady with the chest cancer. Her daughters were speaking to her so rudely . There’s tough love I know but that wasn’t it. I’m sorry their mum was so ill , thinking from the mother’s side I would hate my family speaking to me like that if I were dying. They should have encouraged their mum not scolded her.
@@M00N.L1GHTyes, I know. But what I find interesting is nearly everyone says ‘I’m fine’. And yes, I’ve caught myself saying it while laying on a gurney with an IV.
I’m such an emotional person oh my God I don’t know if I could ever work in a place like that. I have work as a paramedic before, but I mean that was just oh man painful I love people, but some of the stuff that you see
Cancer is such an epidemic in our world now. Its the worst disease imaginable. We need a CURE. I watched my mom die from it 4 years ago when i was 30 and it just takes any dignity you have left away. Was the most painful thing ive had to deal with watchin her die
Oh my. It’s not right to lie to a dying person just so you feel better. Let them make their peace with it. You have zero control over when it’s their time. Stop making it about you .
My son was 19 when he got lymphoma, (in 2020, right when Covid hit). After his first round of chemo he came home and was immediately back in hospital. He had congestive heart failure, multi organ failure, got c-dif, and other not so nice things. Because of Covid there were no visitors allowed but they made a special exception for me because my son was so sick. Every day they asked him several times if they should take heroic measures with him or if he wanted to be DNR. Every time he said heroic measures. When he couldn't answer I gave his answer. They did have to take those measures once, and today, three years later, he is cancer free and has been for two years.
Bless you both! Amazing!
Apparently, thankfully, heroic measures was the right thing to do in your son’s case. I think it depends on a lot of factors.
the power of a mother's love is so much greater than most realize!
I'm so so sorry your son had lymphoma I have T-Cell lymphoma it's in "holding pattern " right now its a kind tht never really goes away wht kind did your son have ??? If you don't mind it's scary to walk around with a compromised immune system I've had covid 3 times 2 times with pneumonia it's because I was a nurse and refuse to go to hospital tht I haven't been admitted I've gone to E.R clinic and touched it at home I wish you the best
Yeah Glory Too GOD🎉🎉🎉🎉😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
The daughter of the lady with cancer couldn’t let go . She needed to give her mom her wish . You can see it in her eyes she was tired and wanted to go.
My thoughts exactly.
Mum is Tired. Captial T tired. Worked long term care for over 2 decades and have seen that look more than once.
This precious mother and daughter with cancer... My daughter age 33 called me one night... and said 'Mom, I have cancer... And then in a totally different voice said... 'I need my mommy'. I went. And we fought. And ultimately I never left her until after she'd taken her last breath.
It was the most horrifying experience of my life... but it was also the most beautiful and precious time as well. I will be ever grateful I had those days and that I could be there for her.
I send them love and pray for their peace.
Rest in Peace Miss Josephine, and my prayers for your family.
Mothers and daughters. Precious...
I’m so so sorry that your daughter went through that God bless you for being an amazing mother
How wonderful of a mom you are to have been there for your daughter. I know she loved you dearly for being there for her.🥰🩷
I know how your daughter felt wanting her mommy around. I’m 62 and I’m going for a double bypass open heart surgery soon and besides my mom not being here, the one I thought would be here if anything went wrong with me was my husband, but he passed away three years ago(2021). I have my two adult sons which I’m so grateful for, but I still feel alone. My mom took care of me all her life, but especially when I turned to type one diabetic at nine years old. After giving my needle back then(1971) she nearly passed out on the bed until she was used to it. We always had a deep relationship talking every single day of our life on the phone and when we received the call that she had passed away(2017) I was devastated.
Then when my husband suddenly passed away, I was in such shock because I had just seen him laughing with the neighbour across the street and a half hour later he was pronounced dead.
Now I’m going to go in and have this operation and I’m so afraid. It’s the first operation that I’m honestly afraid of having. It’ll be my 22nd operation and then I have a hand operation afterwards or it could be before I go in for my heart operation. I’m hoping that I can get some of my life back because I have no energy right now but I’m hoping and praying that everything goes OK.
Take care. 🥰🥰🩷🩷
Thank you for being such an amazing mommy.
When I was dealing with the begining stages of cervical cancer it would have been amazing if my mother could have held my hand and assured me it was going to be ok. As she said it, "it's not even serious cancer yet"
Matteus is doing an amazing job. It’s a lot on your shoulders when you have to handle most of the communication.
My goodness the daughter needed to have a DNR discussion before she got to this point. My family has had this discussion. If your family has not had this talk please do not wait. It is easier on everyone if they know it is your choice and they do not feel like you’re killing you.
I agree. It seems the daughter did not want to let go. That poor woman looks so tired.
My 85 yr old Mother who was diagnosed with stage 4 Acute Myeloid Leukemia had the hospital put a wristband on her that said DNI/DNR before any of us got to the hospital so we didn't have to make that decision. She also put it in writing, and I promised to honor whatever she chose for her life. Once we realized this was an aggressive form of cancer and the chemo was no longer working I brought my Mom home to die in her own house surrounded by those she loved. We had her for 2 weeks before she passed away two months ago. She wanted to go out with dignity and grace. At 85 she had earned it, and we had to be strong enough to follow through because we loved her so much. She was my best friend, and the grief is still strong. The void it left is still to big to fill, but each day I am celebrating her every single day to lessen the pain and fill the void.
I can feel this so deeply. I'm sorry for your loss. We had a similar situation with my papa. He had voiced he didn't want to keep trying to fight the cancer after many attempts and failures. We had him a month before he passed peacefully in the bed he loved and house he had been the king of. We got as much time as we needed to say goodbye which was so nice.. no machines no other people to rush is to make room for another patient.
Oh my God I am so so sorry to hear that I couldn’t even begin to imagine
I am still saddened to see so many people who will not let their terminally ill family members die with dignity because it will make THEM sad . Real love knows when to let go .
Wow. I lost my mom to lung cancer in 2004. Her illness was FAST. We were all together on diagnosis day, so some quick decisions were made, and 2 weeks later my mom moved into our home. Being with her daughter and grand kids in those final days was exactly what she needed. We laughed a lot and I think she had a blast, to be honest. She didn't suffer at all, she wasn't in pain, and she was with us for all of 3 weeks before she passed away. Thank GOD for Hospice. I couldn't have done it without them, they're marvelous. And my mom got to be where she wanted to be, at her daughters home, and that's what mattered most of all.
Love the ladies conversations... women helping each other.
Matteus is so precious. I hope he gets to be a kid. Hugs to the families.
I feel bad for Josephine’s daughter but she needs to accept that her mom needs and I think wants to go. The hardest thing I did was tell my 42 year old husband that it was okay to go but I am glad I got the courage to ease his mind before he died in peace. Brought back memories. Emotional episode.
Sometimes they need that. My dad (he was only 53) didn't want my sister to see him go, because she would have been irrevocably broken. So he waited until I took her home and told him, "I took Kimber home dad... it's okay, you can let go." And he did 15 minutes later.
It's hard, but they need that affirmation.
Mum has accepted her fate. The daughter has yet to do that. She is already going through the stages of grief - denial and anger being two of them. She is not even willing to acknowledge that her mother is, in her own words, „on the way out“. Daughter reacts angry, brushes her remark aside and won’t even allow any talk about what will come. I cannot really fault her for it…she is literally not in her right mind at the moment.
My Mum died from lung cancer that went to her brain. We live in the US. No doctor had that convo with my Mum. They didn't even tell us it was terminal. They push so hard to keep people alive in this country when they shouldn't. And I get it. Families don't want to talk about it,so doctors approach it with kid gloves or not at all. Bless that doctor.
My husband died from lung cancer as well but in reality the medication killed him first. It's poison what they use and he agreed to it all. I'm not sure I would but thankfully I've not been asked to make that decision.
My mom passed away from lung cancer that also went to her brain sent up a prayer for you
The first thing my husband doctor asked me was where his was. Then I asked can you do anything. Chemotherapy radiation. Then after a few treatment I asked if it was better they told me no. Stage 4. I spoke with my husband he signed the DNR. After my Dad died of cancer we learned to ask a lot of question.
@@xyz12345457 Nor mine. The staff was so great. They did however have me talk to her about signing a DNR but the nurse was right there with me. My mom battled for 10 months. The last 2 weeks were spent at her home where she passed peacefully with almost all of her children around her. It's been 12 years and I remember it like it was yesterday.
When the doctor pounded on Dad's heart and brought him back I asked him how long he had from his skin cancer and he said 6 months.I took him every Saturday for Father daughter days until the last Saturday when he died. I took him
for 8 months.He was so excited for those Saturdays he would get up at 4am .It was wonderful and showed him how I loved him.
What a lovely wee girl? Seems very bright and very brave
I’m so glad Josephine got to go home and that her pain is now gone. I can’t imagine how awful it would be to feel like you couldn’t do something as simple as breath. You cannot expect your loved ones to stay for you… you need to let them go with God.
I know my nephew is an ER nurse and the one thing he stressed was that his Nana, my mother and his mother’s mother, would sign a DNR.
We lost her to prolonged dementia last Summer, and he had a horror of them trying to resuscitate her at her age. She was 93.
He said when you resuscitate an elderly person like that you do so much more harm than good, most times when you do CPR their bodies take such a beating in that effort of trying to bring them back, if you do they almost never recover. Thankfully, that did not happen.
I’m so sorry that you lost her
I lost both parents. Now, though in my 50s, I will be getting a DNR and life saving measures. Just let them go. Don't make them feel like they are guilty for dying. This is life. Love is hard, love is long, love makes us strong.
Thank you for saying that. I hate thinking that very sick and dying people feel guilty for that which they cannot control. It makes their last emotions/memories (and more so the surviving loved ones) stressful and unpleasant.
Cancer sucks! It is so hard watching those who cared for you reach the point of needing care and to let them go
I hope to God I never have to go through something like that and I hope you have never had to go through something like that
Little girl is so smart
Rest in peace, Josephine. ❤
Olivia is adorable and Sara and her mom were lovely.
Olivia ❤ Innocence and Curiousness at its peak!
The dear woman with terminal cancer seemed to brighten up knowing that she'd soon be "at ease". ❤🙏🏽
The lady with cancer said so much with just her face. No matter how many people are supporting you in the end there is a part of it you go through yourself. I feel for her.
Cancer. ABSOLUTELY heartbreaking
Kim, the Nurse Practitioner, is tops! She's that aunt or great-aunt that loves you like a mom and will take care of you, but she will also have a laugh at you, at herself, or hold you while you cry.
Just a sweet, caring generous person. 😇🥰
Nurse Abbie is so sweet, compassionate and empathetic, so supportive at such a sad time. Well done Abbie.
I lost my mother in law to lung cancer in April 2018 - just 6 weeks after her diagnosis. We told her that we wanted her here but understood if she didn’t want to fight anymore. It makes me sad that Josephine’s friends/family pushed her when she was clearly happy with her life & ready to move into the next one ❤️
My Dad died at 50 from a very rare cancer that was in his chest wall, then near his heart, and in his left lung. It was a tough 2 yrs watching him slip away, become weaker... broke my heart and I miss him every single day. 💔 But, there came a point he was so tired it was time. He came home, our family came, his coworkers came, and we all stayed with him. My mom held his hand until the end. He died 4 days after coming home from the hospital. We had hospice nurses and comfort care. It was exactly how he wanted to go.
I think Josephine's daughter got very stuck in her carer role which was why it was so hard for her to let go, it's hard enough when it's your parents, but when you are also the one who takes care of them, it makes it more difficult. I hope she has found her peace in her mother's passing and knows she did everything she could to care for her loved one.
What a sweet n loving young girl. So chatty n strong❤
That relationship between Josiah and his grandmother is so precious. It’s one of the reasons that I learned French
Whatever Portuguese I’ve learned that as well, it doesn’t make a difference, but it’s just to me. It shows a powerful bond between people that extends much further than language
The day before I brought my mama to my home for hospice care I got into a tiff with the nurse at the hospital. She had stopped breathing during the night before and I could not understand why they wanted to release her. I knew she had a DNR. I knew her medical history and that she was near the end but I just could NOT get it straight in my head. I was so stupid, and crazy sad. I eventually went back and apologized to the nurse. I think it's a pretty normal reaction. I had all the information I needed but wasn't ready to accept the truth of the moment. The nurse was incredibly kind...thank goodness. My mama passed away 3 weeks later with me beside her , holding her hand, and singing "you are my sunshine". It is breathtakingly hard to lose your mama.
Both my parents who died exactly 17 yrs and 1 week from each other both passed at home with the four kids . Grandkids went in after they passed to say something ...when dad died he had five grandkids and one on the way. When mom died she had six grandkids and 11 great grands. She was the best.
I’m so happy that he’s been free from that for that period of time. That’s huge. That’s another take on life. ❤
We lost our daughter from cancer a few months ago. The end was awful until she allowed them to keep her comfortable. We watched her take her last breath. She looked just like the mom here, when she went into the hospital the last time.
One of my favorite episodes...I went through something similar with my dad. So hard to make those decisions...RIP Josephine.
I won’t forget Josie’s family, and I won’t forget Josie…I felt the heart felt love the family had, hated to see this one go 😢and daughter was right, her mom was stunning, breathtaking, just so very beautiful and the eyes …omgoodness, gorgeous!
I’m so sorry for your loss!
Agree, Josie was absolutely gorgeous in her youth. Her poor daughter really didn’t want to let her go. I’m glad she finally passed peacefully.
How adorable is Olivia? Plus such an imagination!
I hope to leave soon (borrowing a euphemism to be P/C) and I can only hope that I meet lovely, professionals like these.
In an odd way, you've given me a measure of hope. Thank you. RIP Josephine. 💗
13 cats is quite the inheritance... As hard as it is, it's good that Josephine was well enough to have a say in her care. My grandfather had dementia and it was my mother and aunt who had to make the DNR decision. It's very hard to make that decision as you are looking at your parent who's still alive and you're having to sign papers to agree for them to die when it comes to that. Despite his dementia and his not remembering any of us or his carers, he was kind and funny to everyone.
Josie’s situation with her cancer and watching her daughter and their relationship with each other was the exact same cancer, situation ie infection and the same relationship as mum and daughter. My mum passed way too early at 72 and I was 47 in September 3rd 2023 (4 months ago).
It’s simply heartbreaking and causes complete heart ache. What a brave woman, just like my mum. Sorry to the family for Josie’s loss. Xxx
Josie, such a beautiful soul. ❤
I'm a retired nursing assistant. I watch these as I miss my job. I must say that the quality of care your team gives and the compassion shown to patients is above and beyond.
As a guy, I do have long hair currently and I’ve always been terrified of losing it, but watching this shows me, it’s such a like who cares about it at the end of the day
My mom died last year from emphysema and a tumor on her heart. They didn't take measures and even talk about it. She died alone in the nursing home she was supposed to rehab in. 2 days before my birthday. My son is 17 and I have already had that discussion with him and my husband. We r in the U.S.
You can never die with dignity. It's always sad, painful and not pretty. But if someone wants to shorten their suffering you have to respect their decision even though it's hard for you. We shouldn't make people live just for our emotional comfort.
I was diagnosed with a malignant melanoma cancer on my back nearly a year ago I’m still taking treatments of Keytruda for it now. I was transferred to the same facility but closer to my home so me and my wife didn’t have such a long trip to get treatments every 6 weeks. The new doctor she told me I have to take another years worth of treatments and a mri I had showed a 9mm spot on my brain and the front of my brain showed I’d been having migraines which I have been having lately. Nobody has actually told me if the cancer is gone I lost 9 lymph nodes to in the surgery to remove the cancer so far. I know what it’s like to have the skin doctor call and he said Randle I’ve got bad news. My heart sank that morning and it’s not come up yet. I’m praying for everyone that has cancer Amen 🙏.
What strong people! 💐
Rest in peace beautiful, sweet Josephine ❤xxxx
I’m so glad they showed a picture of Josephine with her hair all fixed the way her daughter described ❤️
I wish I was friends with Sara, she seems wonderful 😊. ❤
She was a beautiful woman ❤and she had a lovely family..
i do not know how it is to have a family who love you i am nearly 100
I had a scare - possible lung cancer - and my mom came. Then the real thing struck. Breast cancer, triple negative. Mom came, as soon as I could handle her. I didn’t want her here during the barfing pArt of chemo but the next phase I definitely wanted her and she was so helpful, besides being supportive. It is hard “giving up” on someone. I am a retired nurse so I can understand that feeling and the fact that you aren’t really giving up on the, you are giving them the best life they can have at the end of their life IF that is what they choose.
Love you Mom.
I'm literally crying so much watching this video. It is so very hard to know that a loved one is dying, but it's worse when you visit a loved one and he has been deceased a few days, my husband, I didn't get a chance to tell him ' I love you '.
I understand how not being able to have children could be more painful than the cancer diagnoses.
I'm going soon to make my will with my husband. We will set up our specific medical wishes and medical POA so we have no worries about what the other wants. Will have the papers filed with our local hospitals and our doctors offices. Don't leave it for your people to try and sort out then worry they made a bad choice.❤
There comes a time to let go, to stop the suffering. This daughter kept pushing for her own sake. She needs counseling.
The look Josephine gave her granddaughter said it all “let me go…..” ❤
I agree Cindy. My husband (51)spent the last 18 months in the hospital. I was relieved for him that he wasn't in pain anymore. But I understand her pain one min she's there for her mom 24/7 and the next it's over. That's the pain I really felt
The daughter was terrified of losing her, she couldn't accept the reality at that point. Having been in that situation with may dad, I can see where she was coming from.
Personally I struggle watching people not be able to let go of ill loved ones although I understand. Neither of my parents allowed me to be there when they passed. I know they didn’t think I would have been okay with it but I believe, even more so, they may have struggled to let go. Still, the most beautiful gift, in my opinion, is getting to hold their hand as they transition. None of us get out of this alive. Just wish I could have been with them. 💜
Thank you!! ❤
This is a question mom and I discussed a few years before it came to that point. I am glad as found I had cancer 2 years before she died. We were in agreement both said no. Let us go. We both had to make the decision for our husbands and then to tell the doctor to take them off the machines. I lived with her the last 5 years of her life. So I am alone now and my kids live in other states. Talk with people beforehand and don't wait.
My mother died of complications of diabetes. Her kidneys had failed (common in long-term diabetics) & her heart stopped while she was on dialysis. That was the 2nd time it had happened & after the first time, she'd signed a DNR. We knew she was terminal & I supported the decision. I'd do the same. Let me go, leave behind this broken body!
Here in Australia, the wait in A&E is about the same as the UK. We have the same urgency points system as the NHS. But the beauty of our system and the NHS is that no one asks about insurance and fees. Everyone gets the best treatment as possible, but in the UK you tend to get referred back to your GP. In Australia you are referred to a clinic in the hospital and also their own rehab. The other thing is that in Australia your medical records are on a centralised government database called MyHealthRecord. This is accessible to any doctor or hospital in the country in real time. In my case my records go back on the system to 1972. Every test, every GP visit, every accident, every scan or XRay, every immunisation. Its all there, and the system uses AI to pick a trend or change that may not be visible in paper records. Illnesses are treated sooner and treatment is consistent.
The little girl that banged her head on the coffee table…..so cute!! 😊
It is tough but important and empathetic to remember that the person who is terminal and dying is saying goodbye to everyone they know. Those of us who are not dying yet are saying goodbye to one person. The burden to be in a dying body AND say goodbye to everyone is likely enormous. Why compound that difficulty and severe stress for the dying person by scolding them into a false "fight for it" momentary recovery?
My Grandma had a brain tumor and went into hospice and my mom wouldn’t let me go because I was pregnant with my first baby and she died, miss my grandma so much.
I am so sorry for your loss. Gentle hugs to you and your family. ❤
Love hospital videos
Sometimes we hang on because the people we love aren’t ready to let us go. That’s ok. We hang on because we love them.
Thanks a million ❤
Like personally to me, I have taken a long time to grow mine out and everything like that but watching that woman, I don’t know to me. It just said like there are things that are far more precious.
Mateus is a beautiful child! Josephine literally said “do not resuscitate “. Why argue?
Seems the lady with cancer wants to go, but her daughter can't let go
Bless them...
As hard as it is family members need to give their loved ones the ok to go to sleep permanently and to be at peace. I’ve had to do it with both my parents so I know
I understand the daughter not wanting her mom to give up. But sometimes people are ready to go. It’s so difficult to accept but the patients’ wishes need to be respected.
Cancer is never good it sometimes makes us stronger in dealing with major issues in our lives...I have always felt if people made the decisions regarding their end of life wishes when they're younger then it takes the burden off of those that have difficulty making those decisions for their loved ones. Resuscitating an older person is putting trauma upon trauma and how they come out of it if they do prolongs the their suffering imo...many people don't like to talk about death and most doctors when the person is being admitted will ask their status for that admission. Josephine doesn't want to let her daughter down.
I just love the English accent that the young Brit’s have. They seem to sound like young adults.
The daughter really didn't help her mum with her own denial. Her mum just wanted to be at peace.
To be honest, I would love nothing more than to be her partner and adopt a child with her ❤
Josephine's daughter is a control freak. Can't stop for a second to think what her mother has been through or wants, only what she thinks is best. Bossing everyone and every situation. Glad Josie can rest in peace now.
Well that was a hard episode to watch. Luckily both my parents are well, both are elderly and I’m the only one to take care of them.
I hope my granddaughters take care of me when I get older. And get sick.
How in the hell are you supposed to keep your shit together walking into a hospital knowing that your parent might not come out alive
These monitors in hospital drive me insane because i can read them. Scary to be patient as a nurse.
❤❤❤Olivia❤❤❤
Josephine's daughter not only inabled her mother with her own OCD but is a solid peiece of ice.
She is very cold the way she speaks to her mother, partner, & own daughter
I just couldn’t imagine the fucking horror excuses language of having to watch your mom go through something like that
The lady with the chest cancer. Her daughters were speaking to her so rudely . There’s tough love I know but that wasn’t it. I’m sorry their mum was so ill , thinking from the mother’s side I would hate my family speaking to me like that if I were dying. They should have encouraged their mum not scolded her.
From my experience, and what I see on shows I watch, why ask how I am if I’m in the ER? Obviously I am not ok. Lol
It is a standard part of a Mental Status exam.
@@M00N.L1GHTyes, I know. But what I find interesting is nearly everyone says ‘I’m fine’. And yes, I’ve caught myself saying it while laying on a gurney with an IV.
I’m such an emotional person oh my God I don’t know if I could ever work in a place like that. I have work as a paramedic before, but I mean that was just oh man painful I love people, but some of the stuff that you see
Why is everyone or everything blurred?
Cancer is such an epidemic in our world now. Its the worst disease imaginable. We need a CURE. I watched my mom die from it 4 years ago when i was 30 and it just takes any dignity you have left away. Was the most painful thing ive had to deal with watchin her die
Oh my. It’s not right to lie to a dying person just so you feel better. Let them make their peace with it. You have zero control over when it’s their time. Stop making it about you .
❤
If I was in that state with cancer, I wouldn't want to prolong the end with antibiotics. The daughter is only thinking of herself.
Geez I wish people would have a heart to allow people to die, I know it's hard, I lost my mother to MD let people go!
Some of these Brits need an ESL course. 😂😂😂
Homie was playing Temple Run on an iPad!
Always amazing to see a daughter tell her dying mother "shut up." A very British behaviour.
we use paracetamol only when we have fever here they use for the pain, damn