I've had trichotillomania since I was a teenager, a lot of things have helped, but it's never been something I've been able to kick completely. Thanks for making these videos that help people who have to deal with these disorders and spread info/decrease stigma for those that don't.
I’ve had TTM since I was a teen too, and I haven’t been able to kick it either. My sister had it as a kid too, but hers “stopped” as suddenly as it started. The most current research suggests a genetic link, so maybe there’s a reason we both have trouble overcoming this disorder that has nothing to do with willpower.
@@nmvwilliams That's interesting about the genetic link, I'll have to look into that. My therapist encourages me to see my TTM and DTM as aspects of my OCD, and I believe they're classified as OCD spectrum disorders in the DSM5? Unfortunately for folks like us, very much not issues that can be solved by willpower. I started picking when I was 3-5, and spent about 30 years trying to stop by willpower alone. It never worked. But ACT and mindfulness therapies have helped me pull & pick much less over the past 5 years or so. I doubt I'll ever be able to stop entirely, but it feels really powerful to have some control over it now. And way less depressing than thinking of myself as a "failure" because I couldn't just will myself to stop. I really wish more people understood these disorders existed so they wouldn't pressure us to "just stop", "just use willpower to quit", etc. I think being told we ought to be able to just control ourselves can be quite harmful to people like us, especially when we start hearing that message as kids or teens. I have to admit, I hope your sister knows how lucky she is that hers didn't become a chronic issue! I imagine she does, though. I'm sorry yours didn't stop like hers did. What a dream come true that would have been, hey?
I’m certain that there is a genetic component to trichotillomania or maybe even body focused repetitive behaviours in general. My little sister has always had trich and I recently developed in in 2019 after my brother suddenly passed away. I then found out that another sibling of mine who passed away before I ever met him would pull out his hair as well.
the way i kicked it was cutting my hair off. probably not the best solution but now i really can’t pull my hair. i hope i get used to not having hair to pull so when it grows back, i won’t have the urge to start again
Never clicked so fast. I pull my skin off my fingers a lot. I've been doing this since I was a kid. It's gotten very bad and idk how to stop it. I did it this morning XD.
🙋♀️ here also. With me, it may be part of my adhd and meds have helped a lot (but not stopped it completely). I started filing the skin with a nail file, since I recognized that it's a tactile/texture based thing. Also handcream (which I hate, I use bodylotion for extremly sensitive and irritated skin, because it dries fast).
I have by no means kicked the habit but some things that helped: adding nail clippers to my keys so I can safely remove the annoying skin/hangnail without causing bleeding and keeping moisturizing products like cuticle oil & lotion near the locations I do it so one at my work desk and one in my pencil case when I'm in classes. Whenever I get distracted, bored or anxious (my triggers) I focus on self care instead of self destruction
I do this at well, lotion also seems to make it harder for me to feel the irregularity’s one the skin and makes it harder to get ahold of skin. Replacing some picking time with a skin care routine (if able too, compulsions make it hard) is refreshin.
I use a nail file on the bits of skin around my nails, especially in the car. I can use it without paying much attention and it keeps my fingers out of my mouth and off my face.
guys, I bite my nails and have trichotillomania but when I traveled outside of the US, it completely stops. I think getting out of the environment that you are in, can help tremendously. It was like a miracle. I think all the stress in my life in the US was giving me too much anxiety, especially with school. Then I travel to my home country for two months, I did not pull my hair or bite my nails for those two months
Same so it has to do with our environment I am been pulling since I hear my neighbors making noise again or when my daughter estranged me left for few months working abroad boredom and toxic people and environment when iam going to India I don’t pull I feel alive and loved and love my freedom stress is the trigger fear of abandonment too so not surprise iam borderline too my scalp itches too I bought antifungus shampoo but overall iam pulling my fingers are pyranas I can’t help it
I agree. When I visit my daughter I don’t pull my hair nearly at all, because I’m worried about leaving hair everywhere. So I focus on not doing it there and I don’t.
Oh my God, i thought that hair pulling was just something that i did to myself. I'm glad that TH-cam and great therapists like you come forward to connect the world. All the best wishes from India 🇮🇳
@@DrTraceyMarks You'll helped me immensely since the past two years after my Mom's sudden passing away due to a cardiac arrest It'll be three years of being connected with you. You're such a Queen ! Thank You for all the tips and tricks and the comfort you provide to all who suffer from these diseases/disorders we shy and hide out with
I'm 45 (F) . I've had trichotillomania since I was 8. I also have eczema and ADHD. 2 years ago, I stated my mental health journey, focusing on my trauma and learning from it, I'm not pulling like I used to but I'm really trying. Please don't give up on yourselves. 💜
@@ajegisylviaochuole2319 Understanding that trichotillomania is a coping mechanism because Trichotillomania is a comorbidity of trauma. I started trauma therapy. Also treating myself with the love, kindness and patience that I deserve.
Scab/skin picking is so difficult to not engage in. The irony is that it makes me more self conscious because i have these scabs and scars on my legs. There is some kind of relief i feel when i do it. I guess its some kind of self regulation process. I do wish there was some kind of medication that can help. I believe this is in the OCD spectrum; i have OCD as well. Anyway, thanks Tracey!
@@pamclare6222 Clever idea, at least for "chewers"... as it were. there are likely other products... Rosebud salve (if you've heard of it) among them... I guess, it really depends on how far you want to research or go for whatever product, at least... versus the helpful and healing aspect and advantages of one over another. ;o)
A new colleague just got hired at the institution I work at and she noticed right away that I pick my skin. She even stated “does it help you if I make you aware of it? That way, once you’re aware, you’ll stop yourself?” Watching this video, I realize I can take it a step further and write down what I’m feeling in the moments when this is happening. I finally found a new therapist and will have an upcoming session with her soon, but I’m not sure if she does Habit Reversal therapy.
Wow. It’s so nice when people who notice something about you are compassionate rather than judgmental and rude. She sounds like a great person to work with.
My early stages of wanting to bite my nails or bite off my skin by my nails: - I feel extremely bored and I want to do something but not an activity itself because that's too demanding. - I see a small imperfection that I need to correct by biting it off. Like skin hanging out a little too much on one end. How I solve it: - I do fake nails at the salon so I can't bite and also that minimizes me noticing the imperfections in my skin. I look more at the nail.
Fighting a compulsive desire to bite your nails is hardly fixed by getting fake nails. Just like the compulsion to pull out hair isn't stopped by buying and wearing a whig.
Funny, I was a compulsive nail biter until my teens when I started painting my nails... then I stopped because the nail polish taste and texture brought me back to my senses. But then due to work I can`t have long, decorated nails anymore, I have to wear them short. Also due to work I need to sanitize my hands all the time, so the skin is always flaking and dry. The nail/skin biting came back with a vengeance, I can't stop it :( When I realize, the skin is already torn and bleeding. It's maddening.
@@lameduck3105 couldn't have said it better myself LOL - I wore acrylics etc for 30-odd years...even had weekly appointments to keep up with the repairs needed to disguise the damage :-0 Positives incl more layers to break thru before reaching my real nails and nail polish and art could disguise, or at least deflect attention from, the damage and infection underneath. Negatives incl the horrific and permanent injury caused to nail beds from repeated forced removal of the acrylics from compulsion and, saddest of all, I was just as (if not even more so) embarrassed - shamed - disgusted by the damage to the acrylics which made compulsive inspections more frequent resulting in more smoothing (which leads to less smoothing, as we all know :-( Now my poor nails, cuticles, and callouses are so shocking (sad) that I want surgery :-( I continually monitor review avert distract wear gloves and creams - it all works :-) until triggered :-0 then all those hours days and weeks of abstinence are gone in a snap (or pick or tear or blade, knife, clippers, etc LOL) My advice? Try anything, try different, try again and commit to self-compassion...I don't do it to distress myself or pi$$ myself off; it's a compulsion :-( and I'll beat it, one day :-/
I've been skin picking from early childhood. I've been bullied and shamed my whole life because of it and that made me do it more. I'm not proud of the scars on my body and use common excuses when asked about them. I had no idea excoriation disorder even existed until I watched you other video just now which brought me to here. It is a habit I've been trying to break for many years and knowing it is an actual documented disorder and I'm not alone in the struggle makes me feel less ashamed. Thank you for this.
Thank you so much for this . I have fine hair mostly but being biracial I have 3C hairs throughout and the satisfaction of running the course hairs thru my fingers before I pluck them out is the hardest thing to get past !! I’ve come such a long way though yall if I can cut back you can too best of luck to anyone working on this !
Perfect timing. I'm sitting here with patch at the crown and ripped up cuticles. Ugh, it has been a stressful couple weeks. I was doing well, but pulled so much without even thinking. I would love to be finished with these behaviors for life. Maybe one day!
I struggled with Trichotillomania from the age of 12, through to my mid twenties on/off Now I'm 27 & haven't had urges for a long while Lost 90 lbs, started working out & fixing my mental health thanks for your video on this
My daughter has the same condition. 26 years...she has a non profit organization to help with suffers...like her. Its good to hear that you have overcome the condition. GREAT NEWS!!
@@poison_plays INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW TO VOTE SUCCESSFULLY: Vote by going to link and then click on heart ❤️ icon. It will ask for you to sign up. Once the sign-up is done then you have successfully voted for The Trich to Stop nonprofit organization a chance to win a $10,000 grant.
I do skin picking on fingers too. But I have found out a good method to avoid the stimulus. Compare to what Dr. Tracy Marks says "stimulus control". The skin around my nails is rough and dry. So I use a nail file to smooth that area. Do it before you go to bed, use a heavy cream after the "skin polish" and wear gloves to sleep. The next day your fingers are so soft and smooth that you can not find a good skin part to start picking. That is a good start to break the behavior. But I am still struggeling to not start again after 3 days. Today I try an additional method: Try to use 1 finger only for picking. So the other 9 can heal. Then I have "just" do 1 little step fourther to get rid of that stupid behavior. I guess thats a good motivation because i have got it made to heal 9 fck fingers! There is only one left. I can do it, so do you !!
My husband picks his cuticles till they bleed when he’s anxious, tired, or bored. It’s always been distressing to me so we’ve talked about it. Having his guitar nearby in the evenings has been a great support! He can practice his music while avoiding the behavior-a great substitution!
Same here. Sometimes before I know it,there will be a pile of hairs on the floor beneath me n I'm like OMG. I think sometimes I don't even know I do it or how long/how much I've done it.
i'm 12 (F) I've had trichotillomania for almost a year. I pluck out one hair at a time and then run it through my teeth, then throw it on the ground. there is so much hair everywhere and i'm so scared. i don't have bald spots and my hair is still thick, but it's starting to thin out and i made my parents believe it was covid. currently the only one that knows about it and i dont know how to confess. please send help
@@sirenshanti thank you!! awe, you are so sweet. i could try a wig, but since i play around with my hair and run it through my teeth, then i'm disgusted by running wig hair through my teeth- but that is a good suggestion and I'll try it. i just don't know how to tell my mom about it ;-; and my dad is never home and when he is, he tells everything about my life to my evil, selfish grandma
It took me a long time to discover this trick, so I hope this idea can help others!!! What helped me stop picking my scalp was getting acrylic/fake nails. They are too thick to get under a scab to pick it off. This gave my scalp time to heal so the cycle of picking sores could end. Usually by the time my nails came off, my sores were healed (less to pick at) and my habit was broken, so I don't have to continue to have fake nails. Of course, I've relapsed a few times but I always use this trick now. Seriously a life saver and so easy as it just completely removes picking as an option for a while. 💙💙 good luck, and thanks for the video Dr. Marks!
Thank you, it's really helpful to know that using this method doesn't mean resigning oneself to acrylic nails for the rest of one's life. That's been my hesitation to try it, since fashion-wise, fake nails aren't really my jam, so I haven't liked the idea of having to wear them indefinitely. But if I can just use them as a temporary tool to break the habitual part of my picking, that changes everything! Especially since I've identified that a good part of my problem is that it's become deeply habitual, and I need a tool to help cut out my tendency to almost mindlessly pick at myself first thing in the morning. (I think it helps soothe my stress over facing the day, so it's hard to kick the habit.) This might just be my key to doing that more successfully. Thank you again so much for sharing your experience! 💚
Me too, I've been picking since I was 3-5. It's hard to believe sometimes I haven't "gotten over it" by 39. But at least I understand now that it's truly not that simple, and never was, despite what other people told my as a kid. I love that Dr. Marks is covering this topic. This video is so helpful, and I'm so thankful to her for making it. Her manner is so nonjudgmental, I feel safe hearing her talk about things like this.
it is a positive replacement, I have been Pulling out my hair, (boredom) and stress, I stopped when My mother died. I have replace it with making things with my hands, at last I have a answer, to what I use to do , Thank you for being there for all of us who do it . I chose to be positive !
I'm only realizing now where my chronic skin picking has come from. Background: I've always picked scabs which have left numerous dark spots on my legs and arms because I'm someone who gets TONS of mosquito bites in the summer and can't stop scratching, usually til the point of bleeding. In the last year, however, I've been in a major depressive episode and did not go outside for months. I stayed in the house all summer which meant no mosquitoes and no bites. I think that's how my scab picking evolved into chronic skin picking. Because I didn't have mosquito bites to occupy me during this usual summer season, I started picking at the skin and hang nails around my thumbs. And more recently, I've been picking at the skin on my toes which has been really bad because it's effected my ability to walk comfortably at times. It's gotten so bad at points and I haven't really found helpful tips on the internet. I tried getting one of those silicon popping fidget toys but that didn't satisfy me as much as picking. But, I'm going to try these tips. Thanks, Dr. Marks!!
It may sound silly... BUT you might try taking up any craft that involves glue... just ordinary paper or wood glue, nothing too serious... Figure out some kind of model or decoration, and make it... origami, maybe and a touch of glue to help some of the things keep together... or to add complexity to paper air-planes... JUST DO NOT WEAR GLOVES OR WASH THE STUFF OFF... Let the glue dry, and then peel it off... I'm a wood-crafter... I often do fine joinery and build various sizes of models and mock-ups using no more than wood glue to hold them together... I also pick scabs, especially the heavy, scaly ones that pull when they get dry... Now, A&E Ointment or Bacitracin will soften those, so they don't pull so bad... AND Carmex will help seal them so the daily elements don't dry them out as quick... BUT the habit's a thing... Except when I have PLENTY of glue-spots on my fingers and knuckles to peel off... AND the worst it ever causes is the occasional hair removal... SO satisfying... No, I don't just slather my hands/arms in glue and wait for it to dry... (haha) That would drive me directly out of my mind... BUT being "too busy" on a project to bother washing the glue off... AND liberally swiping the stuff with a finger or thumb whenever I clamp parts together and get "squeeze out" assures I get little gobs and streaks up and down... Always need the "business finger" available and clean for the next bit of squeeze-out, SO... back of the hand, a stripe on a forearm... AND sometimes, when I've run out of clamps... I play the glue between thumb and fingertips a few minutes instead of rushing to the bathroom to wash up... only allowing myself to go get coffee to wait for "set time" when there's a nice film dried in place (obviously so it's safe to handle food or drink... lolz)... AND I can sit quietly with a trash can nearby and pick and peel harmlessly, because of course... "It's dried. Can't wash that off NOW... " (haha)... Now... I used to pick at EVERYTHING... plucked hair off my hands and arms... picked any scab that was sufficiently dried to do so... even ripped skin out with fresh scabs... even antagonized the cat(s) when I'd run out of scabs (healed?) to get some new ones... BUT with the satisfying sensation of some old fashioned glue removal... I have stuff to show for the craft I learned, AND I'm not causing myself any worse harm MOST of the time... Sometimes, there's just a nasty, thick, heavy scab and it's near a joint... and pulls... AND YOU KNOW as well as I do what that's going to do as soon as I shower... I love HOT showers and stand under the water a LONG time... haha... ...I'm a bit of a mess... BUT maybe it's a bit of progress... and hope. You CAN'T discount hope. ;o)
Very logical and helpful. My hair pulling caused by stress and anxiety - i have a boss who bullies me nearly every day. I only pull my hair when I'm sitting watching tv, I never do it anywhere else - so I cut down on watching tv and go to the gym or read. I'm not back to normal yet but have made huge progress from this advice.
For me implementing harm reduction strategies has also helped. Making sure I sanitize my hands before and after picking reduces risk of infection and disease both to myself and others. Obviously I'm also trying to avoid a lot of it in general but the harm reduction strategies also help
I watched this video 2y ago and I'm coming back to say it helped me SO MUCH. I still skin pick sometimes, but much less than before. Im more self-conscious of why i do it, which also means im more forgiving with myself if i do it nowadays, whxih breaks the cycle. A big thank you from Denmark. ❤
My God, I've been pulling my hair since I was 17. Today I am 45 years old and I still pull my hair. There are days that are more intense and others I don't even remember doing it. It's such a relaxing feeling =x
Omg, so similar here. It is such an absent minded behaviour - until I have the right hair in my fingers… and by then it usually is too late to stop the pull.
i’ve had trich since i’ve first had hair. i have this bracelet i wear everywhere with beads on it with a stretchy string to keep my hands busy. it helps so much. i mostly pull my hair out right before i go to sleep, or when i am bored. this really helped me realize everything going on and how to stop it. thank you!
Thank you so much for making this video. I struggle with hair pulling, specifically with my beard. I've caused Bald patches before, and I hate myself for doing it. It takes me so long to grow my beard back after I shave it that it's emotionally painful when I've gone and made a mess of it and eventually have to shave to keep from looking awful. I'm going to follow your guide to the best of my ability to insure that this bad habit gets put to rest.
I used to put a scarf tight in my head to avoid playing with my hair and it really worked. The problem is I forget to put the scarf on or I am bored to get up and wear one. I should have scarves near the couch or wherever I sit…
acrylic nails help me so much. i cant pull my lashes with my hands or pick at my skin. i also can't chew my real nails and i don't want to ruin the pretty acrylics. also nail tapping and playing with the fake nails is a great distraction!
Thank you for the advice. I realised that my scalp-picking habit might be OCD last year. For this year, I tried to fight with this habit myself but it usually relapse. RecentlyI developed a method of controlling it: 1. wear a somewhat tight cap to reduce the feeling on the scalp that triggers my behaviour; 2. I found a little branch in the forest with really smooth surface so I like grabbing and touching it. When I'm studying or watching a video, I wear the cap and grab the branch on my hand. Hopefully this time I can areduce the behaviour.
Hi, after your last video about nail-biting, I decided to do a real effort to change my habits, I got a nail polish with bad taste, I went to do my permanent gel nails and did a big effort to stop touching my hands consciously and use only a filer if something is out of place, but no scissors or pulling. After a month, I have picked the skin around my nails a couple of times without noticing, but only bleed once and now my nails are long, I can use them to open things and finally my fingers don't have any wounds, so I have nothing to pick or pull. It was hard, but I had to learn to feel the irregularity of scabs, nails and skin and not do anything about it, but now it's easier because my fingers are healthy. Now I direct all that energy into cleaning under my nails and feeling how soft the polish feels.
I swear your are my targeted ad… I started a goals journal LITERALLY YESTERDAY, nail biting & picking was top of the list. This happens all the time with you! It kind of creepy.
I am a late comer to trichotillomania. It started 4 years ago; am now almost 66. I have been picking my left eyebrow till almost bald. My dark brown eyebrow pencil is very important to me. I do it when stressed. My hand is like a strong magnet to my eyebrow, and it’s very difficult to keep it away, even if I try to sit on my hand and try to change my thoughts. My hand just wants to be sucked to my eyebrow like a big vortex. It’s such a strong pull. It like numbs my thoughts to something else, yet the stress is unfortunately still there. I am going to try relaxation yoga, Qjong, or deep breathing to stop the train of thought.
You remind me of myself! I am 66 and didn't know this disorder even had a name until I happened to read an article about hair pulling, I was in my late 50s! In my senior school picture I have long bangs because I had no eyebrows! I am reminded every time I look at that picture. My family always telling me growing up, stop pulling your hair, I still hear that to this day,we are all in this together! :)
@@sandraolson1022 I am finding that when I am creative and busy with it, I don’t think of pulling my hair. I went through a 3 month dull drum aimless phase, not having any art goals to accomplish. It created a lot of stress inside me. I felt lost. Am now taking an art class, I have lots of paintings and new skills that I want to learn and accomplish, so am feeling fulfilled. Daily yoga, even if for 15 minutes has also really helped calming the inner stress.
My therapist suggested a sample carpet tile/square to pick at. It was great. I eventually stopped, this habit comes and goes. Now the habit is back, time for new carpeting!😮😊
ooo that's a good idea. I really want a good pull fidget toy and haven't been able to think of anything that would satisfy, nothing currently on offer is good. I keep meaning to get a wig to pull from, but for some reason that feels a big difficult.
I suffered from a type of tillomania, along with depression, a larger amount of neuroticism from childhood and partner abuse. I was very very anxious and no longer had close friends (like that partner to help and no money for therapy). So I, At my breaking point, decided to go a on journey to “do or die” by any means necessary. And the methods in this video, your mindfulness video, some intentionality, and with an abstract version of a support structure that I call “me, myself, and I”, I was able to successfully find my inner child, and got her to help me make this journey back. I’m still walking back with her now… she is prolly an 18 yr old now… we are still on the path tho… but this is the healthiest I have ever been emotionally… thank you!
Thank you so much, i had known i had this but i just got so frustrated and scared so much tonight, watching this video gave me a roadmap. At least, i know where i am going.
I successfully quit biting my nails but still struggling with picking at my cuticles. I get hangnails easily and then I obsessively play with them until I can’t resist pulling and biting at them. The goal in my head is to get rid of imperfections but of course it makes it look worse until it heals
Congratulations on eliminating the nail biting. I can see how the hangnails would be hard to resist And it’s hard for them to go away unless your patient enough to let them grow out. But if you can conquer the nail biting you can do this too. 👍🏽❤️
When I see a guy with hangnails, more often than not, it is someone who doesn’t keep his cuticles pushed back. Since I make my own hangnails 🤦♀️, there is a pair of nail clippers in every room and vehicle.
thank you! I’ve been picking at my skin since I was about thirteen I believe and I never really realized that there could be clear steps to move away from it. Hopefully all works out, I noticed while watching the video that if I force my hands to stop picking, I begin biting my lips or cheeks and wiggling my toes, but petting the dog makes me stop biting my lips so I think I personally need to focus on hands. your videos are wonderful!
I ruined my eyebrows this way. Running through them, bend them with my pink and picking. They are very sparse and crazy.. Currently try to regrow them with castor oil, hope it will have some effect. 🤞 Good luck everyone 💕
Me as well, there was a point in time I had completely picked both my eyebrows off, I had to draw them on and it looked terrible, it was embarrassing. Castor oil definitely helped regrow them. Nowadays I always have at least one bald patch, I gotta stop this compulsive behavior 😣
I've been doing/trying all these things in the video for 20 years, somehow they helped but everytime it was starting to get a bit better the triggers were simply changing and resetting what i did till that point. I struggled with tricotillomania almost my whole life, the only solution i found that actually works is keeping my hair very short... It hurts me to don't be able to have long hair (even more as a woman) but it's the only thing that works for me. I tried to do it for periods many times (for example keeping them very short for 2/3 years and then letting them grow again) but even if i hadn't felt anything related to it for so long, as soon as they reach a lenght that is easy to grab, the tricotillomania instantly comes bk... I try to fight it for some time with all the things said in the video but the fact that it always comes back and wins over me everytime destroys me psychologically so much that i just prefer the pain of not seeing myself anymore with a feminine haircut... It's a painful fight i just prefer to avoid... I still pick my eyebrows and eyelashes sometimes but i'm able to control that kinda well... Thanks for doing these videos btw, these "pathologies" are so unknown or considered like a stigma or a taboo that it makes the people that suffer from them feeling even worst.
Please go GET PROFESSIONAL HELP. Pulling out hair and skin.picking can LEAD TO INFECTIONS THAT CAN KILL YOU!!!! There are medications that can help with OCD. This condition is more than a painful habit....IT CAN BE DEADLY!!!!
0-senzacije u telu kao stezsnje lica, stomaka, samooptuzivanje Touching structuring smth; 1- vunica, drzati ruke - stop urge in few minutes 2-consequence of behaviour (make written plan and 3-stimulus control - block triggers that cause (rukavice na ruke, prstici od vunice
I’m 16 and for the past 5 years I literally haven’t gone a fucking day without picking my acne at LEAST once (and there are weeks where every single day I pick at every imperfection I can possibly find on my face, legs, chest and arms and I can’t even stop myself once I’m bleeding and red and inflamed, my fingers just keep rummaging around and searching). I’ve been trying to stage interventions with myself, literally every day I think today will be my final picking session, but it just never happens!! I’m so sick of it because I really like my features now and I’ve become a lot more confidant in myself but I always seem to self sabotage in this manner and it’s usually after the days I feel the prettiest that I go and pick the most. I have a suspicion that some of this struggle is due to maybe home having bipolar2 disorder. I think it used to be cyclothymia but the difference and severity of my moods had really worsened. You’d think it would be the ‘low’ periods where I engage in this the most but the worst sessions usually happen late at night, during a “high” (usually lasts 4-6 days) where I have so much pent up energy that desperately needs releasing. It’s awful!!! Im going to give your tips a really good shot because I am truly truly sick of being held back by this shit
Thank you for sharing this. Can you please make videos addressing self sabotage? Or the need to isolate and pushing everyone away? I tend to do this more than i want to admit.
Thanks for this video. I compulsively pick and peel dry skin off my feet, usually until they bleed. It’s not painful while I do it, but afterwards the pain kicks in and I have trouble walking. Im too embarrassed to admit to people why I’m limping. I always pick at my feet when I’m watching tv on the couch. Im also a chronic foot/knee fidgeter, tapping and bouncing my foot, leg, even sometimes in bed at night when I’m trying to get to sleep. I have ADHD and don’t use meds, because the waiting list for. Psychiatrist in Australia is at least 6 months long for those who still have books open. I’ve been on lexapro for anxiety and depression for approx 25 years, but I think I was misdiagnosed way back when. Im 54 now.
Please keep trying to get PROFESSIONAL HELP . There are anti OCD meds that can help you. Do your best to STOP THIS DANGEROUS HABIT. Infections happen then you lose a foot or a leg and perhaps DEATH! My boyfriend picked at his feet. He got infected and almost lost his leg!!! They operated but the wound in his leg DID NOT HEAL and then HE DIED. STOP IT NOW!!!!!
I started pulling my scalp hair since i was 14 (now 58), started getting bald spots on the one side and top of my head. I was so ashamed of it I never thought I could stop. I' ve been struggling with this disorder for so many years, feeling ashamed, isolated and lonely. Do wigs help at all to stop doing it??? Wishing everyone to overcome it.
I have trichotillomania, it started at age 7 when my mom and stepdad got married and they started abusing me. It was a form of coping with the pain but brought a strange sense of pleasure (for the moment). Now as an adult I have removed the majority of the things that would trigger me. I don't have the triggers as often but there are certain things that have occurred during my military career and previous marriage that creep up certain times of the year. I have standard poodles. They help me with my emotions and I love on them and run my hands through their curls. Because they have hair that feels very similar to my curls it helps, plus they get free rubs and loving. I am sad to know that so many people suffer with this, but it's comforting to know that I am not some freak show that deals with it alone...Hugs and healing... 🐩💓😊
My trich began at age 12. My parents would drop my sister and I off at my Uncle and Aunt who fought like wild animals. My sisters nose would began to bleed (Maybe she just had a nose bleed and that is what I recall) and I remember pulling the first hair and getting that white bulb root. It was the most satisfying things I had ever felt at age 12. It actually was both painful and pleasurable. I pulled till I had many thin areas of hair, mainly on the top of my head. I would collect the hairs I pull as a way to deter me from pulling again. That did not work well. My doctor said as long as I was not eating my hair he did not want to put me on meds. He prescribed learning origami, particularly unit origami, where you make the same piece many times to complete one unit of something. Indeed this helped tremendously. I have learned to fold many beautiful and complex models of origami. But I must be careful not to allow frustration in folds I can't get because I could begin to pull due to that. But otherwise learning to occupy my hands is something that helps. Ha, you are not alone. My family thought I was crazy when I told them how it felt "oh so good" the pain and pleasure all mixed into one. My hair has permanently thinned in the top, but thank goodness I have kinky hair which can hide the sparse mixture. Only if I blow dry and straighten it can you tell I have picked one to many hairs. 😊
@@joannaedwards6325 I am getting help and I don't need poison to mask my issues. I'm not sure if you thought your response was helpful but it wasn't. Please be mindful of who and what you are saying to people you don't know, especially when it comes to trauma and mental health. Have a nice day.
I have skin picking and I have a bunch of crystals bc I collect them and I just an idea to play with and feel texture of the crystals instead of picking. Thanks for the tip!! I’m gonna try it all day today
Thank you so much for this video. My skin picking has always been minor and paired with other things like nail biting and nose picking, so I didn't think much of it. But now I'm picking my skin so bad I know I will have permanent scars if I ever let them heal. I haven't had the courage to bring it up in therapy yet. I am going straight to that worksheet. thank you so much
Thanks for this! I developed a bad hair pulling habit when I worked in a call center that followed me after I left that awful job. I'm definitely going to apply these steps to stop that habit.
did all she listed in the video and more, senyding this to my mom because she thinks that I could just stop doing this at any point, and so yeah tysm for the video. XD
If you work from home or don't have anyone to watch you and tell you when you are engaging in the habit, you can video yourself with your phone or web cam.
Thank you so much Dr. Tracey! I pick my fingers something awful, cuticles and fingertips too... my index finger is all calloused over and bc the skin has thickened and it makes me want to pick more...
I've had trichotillomania since I was a young child. Off and on. Went years without plucking, now I'm back at it for 7 years. It's horrible. My hair won't grow back now now that I'm older. Fake nails help to stop me from picking, so I need to go get fake nails. So basically started picking around 7-10 yrs of age, stopped in my teenage yrs and through my twenties, mid 30's I picked it back up again.
I have this bad habbit of pulling my hair... even sometimes i do not want to but can't resist... that dopamine it give...ufff i thought its just me Thank you Dr...from INDIA ❤
I've had some success from wearing something relatively frictionless on my thumb, for example, cutting up a polythene (not rubber) glove so that the only digit actually covered is the thumb. This allows me to keep typing/working unhindered, but eliminates 'grippiness' (traction) on the left thumb so that I'm not able to pull out any hair (in my case, beard hair). As soon as I recognize I'm pulling, I can stop myself and, because of the thumb-glove, I don't lose any hairs before I 'wake up' to the behavior. I really hope you guys will try this and that it will help you out. Much love.
What a great video!! I have trichotillomania as well as dermatillomania and I definitely use Vaseline on my fingers for skin picking and try to wear headscarves and hats when I’m relaxing or laying in bed to keep me from pulling out my hair. I love all of this!
congratulations for reaching the milestone of 1 MILLION subscribers 👏👏👏🎊🎉 , congratulations for your hard work, perseverance, for helping so many people, me included .
I love your work. You as a person, your energy. You are an amazing individual for making people like me more able to discern between worry and actual mental issues
This is such useful information and presented in a clear, helpful manner. I have picked at my cuticles and skin around my finger tips for a very long time, at least 30 years (I'm 56 now). I'll recruit my wife's help to apply the Habit Reversal Training practices. Thanks for the inspiration and encouragement.
Thank you Dr.Marks for your time and consideration, I'm trying to get my son to watch your videos he needs help but but want see a Dr., again thank you.
I pick at my scalp like crazy, I can tell my hair is thinning because of it. It's just so hard to stop. I noticed that when I get acrylic nails, I don't pick as much. It's just not as satisfying. Not the best solution but it helps me stop when it gets bad.
Timely (again). I've had a fingerless mitt on my hand for the past two days. Every day for the past couple of years it was getting so sore with open wounds that I couldn't bear to get it wet. But then I would have to. I'd put moisturising cream on it before sleep but the next day I would pick at it again. I used to do it when I was around people. Picking inside my palm was easy to conceal. I had to do something and with the group of people I supported as my work any kind of stimming or fidgeting causes issues. But I've been off work for a year and do it when I'm on my, which is almost all the time. A stimmy shoe lace helps but having just watched the video I also realise now that I also bite my lip and want to stop that too. It was an accident that I started doing that but it's become a compulsion. It's when it gets sore that I first realise I've actually been doing it for a while.
wow. i have eczema and i intuitively did these exact step to trying to fix it. I didn't do them in that order but i did everything on this list - that's wild, lol. At least now i know names for the steps i took and can implement them more concretely in the future
I'm 45 yrs old, have MANY of these symptoms,and so do both of my children.If you suppress one, something else WILL come up to replace it( sometimes even vocal "tics"). So,I try and think of more socially acceptable alternatives...put little pieces of rough Velcro under desk, keep a quarter in pocket to rub edge, etc. and don't worry if you catch yourself pulling/picking/ biting. Just gently try your new habit.
This is so helpful. I think i actually did this type of behavior when i finally quit smoking cold turkey (swapped menthol cigarettes for mint gum). I definitely going to try putting this into play to help me quit picking at my face.
When I was 7 I got into plucking my eyelashes to the point I plucked just about all of them. The habit came back in highschool when I started growing facial hair. Plucking facial hair was minimal until I started growing a full beard. Now I do it all the time and it's making the beard patchy. Thought I was alone in this, thank you.
I have a tendency the pick the inside of my lips with my teeth, and sometimes pull eyelashes and eyebrows for loose hairs. This was a helpful vid, thanks
I've had trichotillomania since I was a teenager, a lot of things have helped, but it's never been something I've been able to kick completely. Thanks for making these videos that help people who have to deal with these disorders and spread info/decrease stigma for those that don't.
I’ve had TTM since I was a teen too, and I haven’t been able to kick it either. My sister had it as a kid too, but hers “stopped” as suddenly as it started. The most current research suggests a genetic link, so maybe there’s a reason we both have trouble overcoming this disorder that has nothing to do with willpower.
@@nmvwilliams That's interesting about the genetic link, I'll have to look into that. My therapist encourages me to see my TTM and DTM as aspects of my OCD, and I believe they're classified as OCD spectrum disorders in the DSM5? Unfortunately for folks like us, very much not issues that can be solved by willpower. I started picking when I was 3-5, and spent about 30 years trying to stop by willpower alone. It never worked. But ACT and mindfulness therapies have helped me pull & pick much less over the past 5 years or so. I doubt I'll ever be able to stop entirely, but it feels really powerful to have some control over it now. And way less depressing than thinking of myself as a "failure" because I couldn't just will myself to stop.
I really wish more people understood these disorders existed so they wouldn't pressure us to "just stop", "just use willpower to quit", etc. I think being told we ought to be able to just control ourselves can be quite harmful to people like us, especially when we start hearing that message as kids or teens.
I have to admit, I hope your sister knows how lucky she is that hers didn't become a chronic issue! I imagine she does, though. I'm sorry yours didn't stop like hers did. What a dream come true that would have been, hey?
Mine was since I was 6. I don’t do it as much but I live at 40 with no eyelashes and spots in my hair. I’ve learned to hide them but I hate it
I’m certain that there is a genetic component to trichotillomania or maybe even body focused repetitive behaviours in general. My little sister has always had trich and I recently developed in in 2019 after my brother suddenly passed away. I then found out that another sibling of mine who passed away before I ever met him would pull out his hair as well.
the way i kicked it was cutting my hair off. probably not the best solution but now i really can’t pull my hair. i hope i get used to not having hair to pull so when it grows back, i won’t have the urge to start again
Never clicked so fast. I pull my skin off my fingers a lot. I've been doing this since I was a kid. It's gotten very bad and idk how to stop it. I did it this morning XD.
Same t h I've done it to where Mt. Finger look weird or infectedn
Me too!! I hate this habit so much 🙁
Me too! I used to bite my nails when I was younger, but now I just pick/bite only the skin on my thumbs really bad. I don't even realize I'm doing it
🙋♀️ here also. With me, it may be part of my adhd and meds have helped a lot (but not stopped it completely).
I started filing the skin with a nail file, since I recognized that it's a tactile/texture based thing.
Also handcream (which I hate, I use bodylotion for extremly sensitive and irritated skin, because it dries fast).
Same
I have by no means kicked the habit but some things that helped: adding nail clippers to my keys so I can safely remove the annoying skin/hangnail without causing bleeding and keeping moisturizing products like cuticle oil & lotion near the locations I do it so one at my work desk and one in my pencil case when I'm in classes. Whenever I get distracted, bored or anxious (my triggers) I focus on self care instead of self destruction
this is great and i have been thinking about this, you just pushed me to try this
❤️
I do this at well, lotion also seems to make it harder for me to feel the irregularity’s one the skin and makes it harder to get ahold of skin. Replacing some picking time with a skin care routine (if able too, compulsions make it hard) is refreshin.
Love this! Thank you for sharing, I'm gonna try the lotion trick
I use a nail file on the bits of skin around my nails, especially in the car. I can use it without paying much attention and it keeps my fingers out of my mouth and off my face.
guys, I bite my nails and have trichotillomania but when I traveled outside of the US, it completely stops. I think getting out of the environment that you are in, can help tremendously. It was like a miracle. I think all the stress in my life in the US was giving me too much anxiety, especially with school. Then I travel to my home country for two months, I did not pull my hair or bite my nails for those two months
I experienced the same changing environment works
Same so it has to do with our environment I am been pulling since I hear my neighbors making noise again or when my daughter estranged me left for few months working abroad boredom and toxic people and environment when iam going to India I don’t pull I feel alive and loved and love my freedom stress is the trigger fear of abandonment too so not surprise iam borderline too my scalp itches too I bought antifungus shampoo but overall iam pulling my fingers are pyranas I can’t help it
Same!!
I agree. When I visit my daughter I don’t pull my hair nearly at all, because I’m worried about leaving hair everywhere. So I focus on not doing it there and I don’t.
It is totally stress for me, and the American lifestyle is so stressful!! I blame capitalism.
I've been struggling with skin picking since I was little and I want to stop so bad. This has helped alot.
Oh my God, i thought that hair pulling was just something that i did to myself.
I'm glad that TH-cam and great therapists like you come forward to connect the world.
All the best wishes from India 🇮🇳
I’m so glad you’re joining me from India 😊
@@DrTraceyMarks You'll helped me immensely since the past two years after my Mom's sudden passing away due to a cardiac arrest
It'll be three years of being connected with you. You're such a Queen !
Thank You for all the tips and tricks and the comfort you provide to all who suffer from these diseases/disorders we shy and hide out with
Nope. I have it too
I'm 45 (F) . I've had trichotillomania since I was 8. I also have eczema and ADHD.
2 years ago, I stated my mental health journey, focusing on my trauma and learning from it, I'm not pulling like I used to but I'm really trying. Please don't give up on yourselves. 💜
Please how were you able to manage it?
@@ajegisylviaochuole2319 Understanding that trichotillomania is a coping mechanism because Trichotillomania is a comorbidity of trauma. I started trauma therapy. Also treating myself with the love, kindness and patience that I deserve.
You're worth it !
@@soblue315 Thank You 😊
@@jenniferbates2811 are you on and adhd meds like adderall?
Scab/skin picking is so difficult to not engage in. The irony is that it makes me more self conscious because i have these scabs and scars on my legs. There is some kind of relief i feel when i do it. I guess its some kind of self regulation process. I do wish there was some kind of medication that can help. I believe this is in the OCD spectrum; i have OCD as well. Anyway, thanks Tracey!
I totally relate to this! I hate that I get scabs on my face but I feel better when I pick it in the moment
I feel a huuuuuuge amount of relief when I rip the scabs off my scalp. I don’t have bald spots from it so they’re very hidden.
@@gnarthdarkanen7464 And Bag Balm, the old fashioned stuff, is good too. Plus it smells so it's a deterrent.
@@pamclare6222 Clever idea, at least for "chewers"... as it were.
there are likely other products... Rosebud salve (if you've heard of it) among them...
I guess, it really depends on how far you want to research or go for whatever product, at least... versus the helpful and healing aspect and advantages of one over another. ;o)
@@gnarthdarkanen7464 Rosebud salve? I like that idea. Bag Balm also deadens pain, so there's that -- it's very handy to have around!
Shout out to y'all that want to get rid of your bad habits 💯
A new colleague just got hired at the institution I work at and she noticed right away that I pick my skin. She even stated “does it help you if I make you aware of it? That way, once you’re aware, you’ll stop yourself?” Watching this video, I realize I can take it a step further and write down what I’m feeling in the moments when this is happening. I finally found a new therapist and will have an upcoming session with her soon, but I’m not sure if she does Habit Reversal therapy.
Good luck to you! And I adore your username
Wow. It’s so nice when people who notice something about you are compassionate rather than judgmental and rude. She sounds like a great person to work with.
What a nice person to be compassionate instead of making you feel uncomfortable. Good luck with everything :)
I was mid hair pulling when this video popped up.
i’ve been doing it for hours it drains me and stresses me out so bad 😢
My early stages of wanting to bite my nails or bite off my skin by my nails:
- I feel extremely bored and I want to do something but not an activity itself because that's too demanding.
- I see a small imperfection that I need to correct by biting it off. Like skin hanging out a little too much on one end.
How I solve it:
- I do fake nails at the salon so I can't bite and also that minimizes me noticing the imperfections in my skin. I look more at the nail.
I found the same. I love my acrylic nails.
Fighting a compulsive desire to bite your nails is hardly fixed by getting fake nails. Just like the compulsion to pull out hair isn't stopped by buying and wearing a whig.
Funny, I was a compulsive nail biter until my teens when I started painting my nails... then I stopped because the nail polish taste and texture brought me back to my senses. But then due to work I can`t have long, decorated nails anymore, I have to wear them short. Also due to work I need to sanitize my hands all the time, so the skin is always flaking and dry. The nail/skin biting came back with a vengeance, I can't stop it :( When I realize, the skin is already torn and bleeding. It's maddening.
@@lameduck3105 couldn't have said it better myself LOL - I wore acrylics etc for 30-odd years...even had weekly appointments to keep up with the repairs needed to disguise the damage :-0
Positives incl more layers to break thru before reaching my real nails and nail polish and art could disguise, or at least deflect attention from, the damage and infection underneath. Negatives incl the horrific and permanent injury caused to nail beds from repeated forced removal of the acrylics from compulsion and, saddest of all, I was just as (if not even more so) embarrassed - shamed - disgusted by the damage to the acrylics which made compulsive inspections more frequent resulting in more smoothing (which leads to less smoothing, as we all know :-(
Now my poor nails, cuticles, and callouses are so shocking (sad) that I want surgery :-(
I continually monitor review avert distract wear gloves and creams - it all works :-) until triggered :-0 then all those hours days and weeks of abstinence are gone in a snap (or pick or tear or blade, knife, clippers, etc LOL)
My advice? Try anything, try different, try again and commit to self-compassion...I don't do it to distress myself or pi$$ myself off; it's a compulsion :-( and I'll beat it, one day :-/
Well for me it works actually. It's a way to remind myself not to touch them.
I've been skin picking from early childhood. I've been bullied and shamed my whole life because of it and that made me do it more. I'm not proud of the scars on my body and use common excuses when asked about them. I had no idea excoriation disorder even existed until I watched you other video just now which brought me to here. It is a habit I've been trying to break for many years and knowing it is an actual documented disorder and I'm not alone in the struggle makes me feel less ashamed. Thank you for this.
Thank you so much for this . I have fine hair mostly but being biracial I have 3C hairs throughout and the satisfaction of running the course hairs thru my fingers before I pluck them out is the hardest thing to get past !! I’ve come such a long way though yall if I can cut back you can too best of luck to anyone working on this !
I had no idea other people felt this, I feel the exact same!
Same!
I have really coily baby hairs and I'm literally addicted to pulling at them...
@@tammy5466 Me too. It's kind of a relief to know I'm not the only one who looks for hairs like this just to pull them 😅
Me too! I love feeling the course hairs. It’s kinda comforting sometimes. When I find a patch I feel so excited to pull them out… 😬
Perfect timing. I'm sitting here with patch at the crown and ripped up cuticles. Ugh, it has been a stressful couple weeks. I was doing well, but pulled so much without even thinking. I would love to be finished with these behaviors for life. Maybe one day!
Please stop HOPING one day will come.
GO GET HELP NOW.
Pulling and picking are MORE THAN ANNOYING HABITS.
People DIE from infections!!!!!
1:55 stress is a common trigger, but so is bordom.
Enlighting
Out of boredom my best friend picked. Eventually he got BADLY INFECTED.
THEN. HE. DIED😢
I struggled with Trichotillomania from the age of 12, through to my mid twenties on/off
Now I'm 27 & haven't had urges for a long while
Lost 90 lbs, started working out & fixing my mental health
thanks for your video on this
Keep going bro
My daughter has the same condition. 26 years...she has a non profit organization to help with suffers...like her. Its good to hear that you have overcome the condition. GREAT NEWS!!
@@tammyg8031 May I ask what your daughter's organization is caused? What a wonderful thing for her to create!
@@poison_plays
INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW TO VOTE SUCCESSFULLY:
Vote by going to link and then click on heart ❤️ icon.
It will ask for you to sign up.
Once the sign-up is done then you have successfully voted for The Trich to Stop nonprofit organization a chance to win a $10,000 grant.
@@poison_plays my daughter will reply to you...
I do skin picking on fingers too. But I have found out a good method to avoid the stimulus. Compare to what Dr. Tracy Marks says "stimulus control".
The skin around my nails is rough and dry. So I use a nail file to smooth that area. Do it before you go to bed, use a heavy cream after the "skin polish" and wear gloves to sleep. The next day your fingers are so soft and smooth that you can not find a good skin part to start picking.
That is a good start to break the behavior. But I am still struggeling to not start again after 3 days.
Today I try an additional method:
Try to use 1 finger only for picking. So the other 9 can heal. Then I have "just" do 1 little step fourther to get rid of that stupid behavior. I guess thats a good motivation because i have got it made to heal 9 fck fingers! There is only one left. I can do it, so do you !!
My husband picks his cuticles till they bleed when he’s anxious, tired, or bored. It’s always been distressing to me so we’ve talked about it.
Having his guitar nearby in the evenings has been a great support! He can practice his music while avoiding the behavior-a great substitution!
I’ve struggled with trichotillomania since I was 5, I can still do it for hours on end and once I start I can’t stop, it’s so embarrassing.
Same! 😬
Same here. Sometimes before I know it,there will be a pile of hairs on the floor beneath me n I'm like OMG. I think sometimes I don't even know I do it or how long/how much I've done it.
i'm 12 (F) I've had trichotillomania for almost a year. I pluck out one hair at a time and then run it through my teeth, then throw it on the ground. there is so much hair everywhere and i'm so scared. i don't have bald spots and my hair is still thick, but it's starting to thin out and i made my parents believe it was covid. currently the only one that knows about it and i dont know how to confess. please send help
@@kittiq I’m sorry sweetie, I know how hard it can be. I cut off all my hair and wear wigs now and that’s helped me 💕
@@sirenshanti thank you!! awe, you are so sweet. i could try a wig, but since i play around with my hair and run it through my teeth, then i'm disgusted by running wig hair through my teeth- but that is a good suggestion and I'll try it. i just don't know how to tell my mom about it ;-; and my dad is never home and when he is, he tells everything about my life to my evil, selfish grandma
It took me a long time to discover this trick, so I hope this idea can help others!!! What helped me stop picking my scalp was getting acrylic/fake nails. They are too thick to get under a scab to pick it off. This gave my scalp time to heal so the cycle of picking sores could end. Usually by the time my nails came off, my sores were healed (less to pick at) and my habit was broken, so I don't have to continue to have fake nails. Of course, I've relapsed a few times but I always use this trick now. Seriously a life saver and so easy as it just completely removes picking as an option for a while. 💙💙 good luck, and thanks for the video Dr. Marks!
Me too!!! But with my face. I always have my nails done now 😆
Thank you, it's really helpful to know that using this method doesn't mean resigning oneself to acrylic nails for the rest of one's life. That's been my hesitation to try it, since fashion-wise, fake nails aren't really my jam, so I haven't liked the idea of having to wear them indefinitely. But if I can just use them as a temporary tool to break the habitual part of my picking, that changes everything! Especially since I've identified that a good part of my problem is that it's become deeply habitual, and I need a tool to help cut out my tendency to almost mindlessly pick at myself first thing in the morning. (I think it helps soothe my stress over facing the day, so it's hard to kick the habit.) This might just be my key to doing that more successfully. Thank you again so much for sharing your experience! 💚
I pick my scalp too. I hate having fake nails though. But something to consider
This used to work for me be I can still pick with the nails now
Thank u so much
I suffered from trichtolimania since my toddler years. This is some very helpful advice
Me too, I've been picking since I was 3-5. It's hard to believe sometimes I haven't "gotten over it" by 39. But at least I understand now that it's truly not that simple, and never was, despite what other people told my as a kid.
I love that Dr. Marks is covering this topic. This video is so helpful, and I'm so thankful to her for making it. Her manner is so nonjudgmental, I feel safe hearing her talk about things like this.
Finding a hobby that is fully engaging and satisfying to the point of exhaustion can be magic. 🏇
My new hobby was biting my fingernails well past the quick.
No nails, no picking.
it is a positive replacement, I have been Pulling out my hair, (boredom) and stress, I stopped when My mother died. I have replace it with making things with my hands,
at last I have a answer, to what I use to do , Thank you for being there for all of us who do it . I chose to be positive !
I'm only realizing now where my chronic skin picking has come from.
Background: I've always picked scabs which have left numerous dark spots on my legs and arms because I'm someone who gets TONS of mosquito bites in the summer and can't stop scratching, usually til the point of bleeding.
In the last year, however, I've been in a major depressive episode and did not go outside for months. I stayed in the house all summer which meant no mosquitoes and no bites. I think that's how my scab picking evolved into chronic skin picking. Because I didn't have mosquito bites to occupy me during this usual summer season, I started picking at the skin and hang nails around my thumbs. And more recently, I've been picking at the skin on my toes which has been really bad because it's effected my ability to walk comfortably at times. It's gotten so bad at points and I haven't really found helpful tips on the internet. I tried getting one of those silicon popping fidget toys but that didn't satisfy me as much as picking. But, I'm going to try these tips. Thanks, Dr. Marks!!
It may sound silly... BUT you might try taking up any craft that involves glue... just ordinary paper or wood glue, nothing too serious... Figure out some kind of model or decoration, and make it... origami, maybe and a touch of glue to help some of the things keep together... or to add complexity to paper air-planes...
JUST DO NOT WEAR GLOVES OR WASH THE STUFF OFF... Let the glue dry, and then peel it off...
I'm a wood-crafter... I often do fine joinery and build various sizes of models and mock-ups using no more than wood glue to hold them together...
I also pick scabs, especially the heavy, scaly ones that pull when they get dry... Now, A&E Ointment or Bacitracin will soften those, so they don't pull so bad... AND Carmex will help seal them so the daily elements don't dry them out as quick... BUT the habit's a thing...
Except when I have PLENTY of glue-spots on my fingers and knuckles to peel off... AND the worst it ever causes is the occasional hair removal... SO satisfying...
No, I don't just slather my hands/arms in glue and wait for it to dry... (haha) That would drive me directly out of my mind... BUT being "too busy" on a project to bother washing the glue off... AND liberally swiping the stuff with a finger or thumb whenever I clamp parts together and get "squeeze out" assures I get little gobs and streaks up and down... Always need the "business finger" available and clean for the next bit of squeeze-out, SO... back of the hand, a stripe on a forearm... AND sometimes, when I've run out of clamps... I play the glue between thumb and fingertips a few minutes instead of rushing to the bathroom to wash up... only allowing myself to go get coffee to wait for "set time" when there's a nice film dried in place (obviously so it's safe to handle food or drink... lolz)...
AND I can sit quietly with a trash can nearby and pick and peel harmlessly, because of course... "It's dried. Can't wash that off NOW... " (haha)...
Now... I used to pick at EVERYTHING... plucked hair off my hands and arms... picked any scab that was sufficiently dried to do so... even ripped skin out with fresh scabs... even antagonized the cat(s) when I'd run out of scabs (healed?) to get some new ones...
BUT with the satisfying sensation of some old fashioned glue removal... I have stuff to show for the craft I learned, AND I'm not causing myself any worse harm MOST of the time... Sometimes, there's just a nasty, thick, heavy scab and it's near a joint... and pulls... AND YOU KNOW as well as I do what that's going to do as soon as I shower... I love HOT showers and stand under the water a LONG time... haha...
...I'm a bit of a mess... BUT maybe it's a bit of progress... and hope. You CAN'T discount hope. ;o)
I got burst in tears, when you mentioned stimulus control. Like you wanted to take my presious thing. Already adressing it to my therapist. Thank you!
Very logical and helpful.
My hair pulling caused by stress and anxiety - i have a boss who bullies me nearly every day.
I only pull my hair when I'm sitting watching tv, I never do it anywhere else - so I cut down on watching tv and go to the gym or read.
I'm not back to normal yet but have made huge progress from this advice.
Dr. Tracy Marks is the best TH-cam psychology channel. The most understandable, conceptually, I’ve ever heard.
For me implementing harm reduction strategies has also helped. Making sure I sanitize my hands before and after picking reduces risk of infection and disease both to myself and others. Obviously I'm also trying to avoid a lot of it in general but the harm reduction strategies also help
I watched this video 2y ago and I'm coming back to say it helped me SO MUCH. I still skin pick sometimes, but much less than before. Im more self-conscious of why i do it, which also means im more forgiving with myself if i do it nowadays, whxih breaks the cycle. A big thank you from Denmark. ❤
My God, I've been pulling my hair since I was 17.
Today I am 45 years old and I still pull my hair.
There are days that are more intense and others I don't even remember doing it.
It's such a relaxing feeling =x
Same 😬
Same, I pull my hair so much. When I am
Stressed or just problem solving. It’s relaxing
Omg, so similar here. It is such an absent minded behaviour - until I have the right hair in my fingers… and by then it usually is too late to stop the pull.
@@TheMcKenzieHaus unfortunately it is 😐
@@fromhgwaii it is exactly like that. And if you don't pull that hair out, a certain kind of anxiety starts not good
i’ve had trich since i’ve first had hair. i have this bracelet i wear everywhere with beads on it with a stretchy string to keep my hands busy. it helps so much. i mostly pull my hair out right before i go to sleep, or when i am bored. this really helped me realize everything going on and how to stop it. thank you!
Picking my skin as this video popped up
Hello Ms. Dr. Tracey. My anxiety gets me to pick eyelashes. I had NO idea this was trichotillomania. Work in progress!
This is a long anticipated video. Thank you Dr. Marks
I know. Sorry it took so long for me to make. 😊👌🏼
Thank you so much for making this video. I struggle with hair pulling, specifically with my beard. I've caused Bald patches before, and I hate myself for doing it. It takes me so long to grow my beard back after I shave it that it's emotionally painful when I've gone and made a mess of it and eventually have to shave to keep from looking awful. I'm going to follow your guide to the best of my ability to insure that this bad habit gets put to rest.
I used to put a scarf tight in my head to avoid playing with my hair and it really worked. The problem is I forget to put the scarf on or I am bored to get up and wear one. I should have scarves near the couch or wherever I sit…
acrylic nails help me so much. i cant pull my lashes with my hands or pick at my skin. i also can't chew my real nails and i don't want to ruin the pretty acrylics. also nail tapping and playing with the fake nails is a great distraction!
NAC (n-acetyl-l-cysteine) and magnesium citrate are both helpful.
Thank you for the advice. I realised that my scalp-picking habit might be OCD last year. For this year, I tried to fight with this habit myself but it usually relapse. RecentlyI developed a method of controlling it: 1. wear a somewhat tight cap to reduce the feeling on the scalp that triggers my behaviour; 2. I found a little branch in the forest with really smooth surface so I like grabbing and touching it. When I'm studying or watching a video, I wear the cap and grab the branch on my hand. Hopefully this time I can areduce the behaviour.
Hi, after your last video about nail-biting, I decided to do a real effort to change my habits, I got a nail polish with bad taste, I went to do my permanent gel nails and did a big effort to stop touching my hands consciously and use only a filer if something is out of place, but no scissors or pulling.
After a month, I have picked the skin around my nails a couple of times without noticing, but only bleed once and now my nails are long, I can use them to open things and finally my fingers don't have any wounds, so I have nothing to pick or pull.
It was hard, but I had to learn to feel the irregularity of scabs, nails and skin and not do anything about it, but now it's easier because my fingers are healthy. Now I direct all that energy into cleaning under my nails and feeling how soft the polish feels.
I swear your are my targeted ad… I started a goals journal LITERALLY YESTERDAY, nail biting & picking was top of the list. This happens all the time with you! It kind of creepy.
Oh wow big brother really is watching 😳😊
Kind of thought the same thing. As long as the surveillance supplies helpful hints, who am I to complain? 🤣
I am a late comer to trichotillomania. It started 4 years ago; am now almost 66. I have been picking my left eyebrow till almost bald. My dark brown eyebrow pencil is very important to me. I do it when stressed. My hand is like a strong magnet to my eyebrow, and it’s very difficult to keep it away, even if I try to sit on my hand and try to change my thoughts. My hand just wants to be sucked to my eyebrow like a big vortex. It’s such a strong pull. It like numbs my thoughts to something else, yet the stress is unfortunately still there. I am going to try relaxation yoga, Qjong, or deep breathing to stop the train of thought.
You might be a late-comer, but it's never too late or early to start recovery
You remind me of myself! I am 66 and didn't know this disorder even had a name until I happened to read an article about hair pulling, I was in my late 50s! In my senior school picture I have long bangs because I had no eyebrows! I am reminded every time I look at that picture. My family always telling me growing up, stop pulling your hair, I still hear that to this day,we are all in this together! :)
@@sandraolson1022 I am finding that when I am creative and busy with it, I don’t think of pulling my hair. I went through a 3 month dull drum aimless phase, not having any art goals to accomplish. It created a lot of stress inside me. I felt lost. Am now taking an art class, I have lots of paintings and new skills that I want to learn and accomplish, so am feeling fulfilled.
Daily yoga, even if for 15 minutes has also really helped calming the inner stress.
@@beeARTcanada that's great!🙂
My therapist suggested a sample carpet tile/square to pick at. It was great. I eventually stopped, this habit comes and goes. Now the habit is back, time for new carpeting!😮😊
ooo that's a good idea. I really want a good pull fidget toy and haven't been able to think of anything that would satisfy, nothing currently on offer is good. I keep meaning to get a wig to pull from, but for some reason that feels a big difficult.
I am a healthcare professional, in my experience what you are explaining are also symptoms of drug use, specifically Chrystal Meth
I suffered from a type of tillomania, along with depression, a larger amount of neuroticism from childhood and partner abuse. I was very very anxious and no longer had close friends (like that partner to help and no money for therapy). So I, At my breaking point, decided to go a on journey to “do or die” by any means necessary. And the methods in this video, your mindfulness video, some intentionality, and with an abstract version of a support structure that I call “me, myself, and I”, I was able to successfully find my inner child, and got her to help me make this journey back. I’m still walking back with her now… she is prolly an 18 yr old now… we are still on the path tho… but this is the healthiest I have ever been emotionally… thank you!
Excellent! Love you Dr Marks. Please make more videos
You are one of the most insightful psychiatrist, on such a broad array of topics, that I’ve come across. Thank you for this service you provide!
Thank you so much, i had known i had this but i just got so frustrated and scared so much tonight, watching this video gave me a roadmap. At least, i know where i am going.
I successfully quit biting my nails but still struggling with picking at my cuticles. I get hangnails easily and then I obsessively play with them until I can’t resist pulling and biting at them. The goal in my head is to get rid of imperfections but of course it makes it look worse until it heals
Greg, how did you do it? I've been trying for decades with no luck.
Congratulations on eliminating the nail biting. I can see how the hangnails would be hard to resist And it’s hard for them to go away unless your patient enough to let them grow out. But if you can conquer the nail biting you can do this too. 👍🏽❤️
When I see a guy with hangnails, more often than not, it is someone who doesn’t keep his cuticles pushed back. Since I make my own hangnails 🤦♀️, there is a pair of nail clippers in every room and vehicle.
thank you! I’ve been picking at my skin since I was about thirteen I believe and I never really realized that there could be clear steps to move away from it. Hopefully all works out, I noticed while watching the video that if I force my hands to stop picking, I begin biting my lips or cheeks and wiggling my toes, but petting the dog makes me stop biting my lips so I think I personally need to focus on hands. your videos are wonderful!
I'm so glad you posted this. I haven't even watched yet but I clicked so fast! I pick my face and my cuticles and can't stop and they never heal.
I ruined my eyebrows this way. Running through them, bend them with my pink and picking. They are very sparse and crazy.. Currently try to regrow them with castor oil, hope it will have some effect. 🤞
Good luck everyone 💕
Me as well, there was a point in time I had completely picked both my eyebrows off, I had to draw them on and it looked terrible, it was embarrassing. Castor oil definitely helped regrow them. Nowadays I always have at least one bald patch, I gotta stop this compulsive behavior 😣
I'm at the point where if I don't stop I'm going to start looking weird. I'm trying very hard to stop. Ain't easy.
I have mine micro bladed because years of over picking made them sparse. It’s worth the money to make them look normal ❤️
I've been doing/trying all these things in the video for 20 years, somehow they helped but everytime it was starting to get a bit better the triggers were simply changing and resetting what i did till that point. I struggled with tricotillomania almost my whole life, the only solution i found that actually works is keeping my hair very short... It hurts me to don't be able to have long hair (even more as a woman) but it's the only thing that works for me. I tried to do it for periods many times (for example keeping them very short for 2/3 years and then letting them grow again) but even if i hadn't felt anything related to it for so long, as soon as they reach a lenght that is easy to grab, the tricotillomania instantly comes bk... I try to fight it for some time with all the things said in the video but the fact that it always comes back and wins over me everytime destroys me psychologically so much that i just prefer the pain of not seeing myself anymore with a feminine haircut... It's a painful fight i just prefer to avoid... I still pick my eyebrows and eyelashes sometimes but i'm able to control that kinda well...
Thanks for doing these videos btw, these "pathologies" are so unknown or considered like a stigma or a taboo that it makes the people that suffer from them feeling even worst.
Please go GET PROFESSIONAL HELP.
Pulling out hair and skin.picking can LEAD TO INFECTIONS THAT CAN KILL YOU!!!!
There are medications that can help with OCD.
This condition is more than a painful habit....IT CAN BE DEADLY!!!!
Dr. Marks, I love you for providing your worksheet without requiring an email. You're so respectful. Just convinced me to subscribe.
0-senzacije u telu kao stezsnje lica, stomaka, samooptuzivanje
Touching structuring smth; 1- vunica, drzati ruke - stop urge in few minutes
2-consequence of behaviour (make written plan and
3-stimulus control - block triggers that cause (rukavice na ruke, prstici od vunice
I have a friend who constanlty does this. I'm happy you posted something about this subject
👍🏽
I’m 16 and for the past 5 years I literally haven’t gone a fucking day without picking my acne at LEAST once (and there are weeks where every single day I pick at every imperfection I can possibly find on my face, legs, chest and arms and I can’t even stop myself once I’m bleeding and red and inflamed, my fingers just keep rummaging around and searching). I’ve been trying to stage interventions with myself, literally every day I think today will be my final picking session, but it just never happens!! I’m so sick of it because I really like my features now and I’ve become a lot more confidant in myself but I always seem to self sabotage in this manner and it’s usually after the days I feel the prettiest that I go and pick the most. I have a suspicion that some of this struggle is due to maybe home having bipolar2 disorder. I think it used to be cyclothymia but the difference and severity of my moods had really worsened. You’d think it would be the ‘low’ periods where I engage in this the most but the worst sessions usually happen late at night, during a “high” (usually lasts 4-6 days) where I have so much pent up energy that desperately needs releasing. It’s awful!!! Im going to give your tips a really good shot because I am truly truly sick of being held back by this shit
Thank you for sharing this. Can you please make videos addressing self sabotage? Or the need to isolate and pushing everyone away? I tend to do this more than i want to admit.
Thanks for this video. I compulsively pick and peel dry skin off my feet, usually until they bleed. It’s not painful while I do it, but afterwards the pain kicks in and I have trouble walking. Im too embarrassed to admit to people why I’m limping. I always pick at my feet when I’m watching tv on the couch. Im also a chronic foot/knee fidgeter, tapping and bouncing my foot, leg, even sometimes in bed at night when I’m trying to get to sleep. I have ADHD and don’t use meds, because the waiting list for. Psychiatrist in Australia is at least 6 months long for those who still have books open. I’ve been on lexapro for anxiety and depression for approx 25 years, but I think I was misdiagnosed way back when. Im 54 now.
Please keep trying to get PROFESSIONAL HELP . There are anti OCD meds that can help you.
Do your best to STOP THIS DANGEROUS HABIT.
Infections happen then you lose a foot or a leg and perhaps DEATH!
My boyfriend picked at his feet. He got infected and almost lost his leg!!!
They operated but the wound in his leg DID NOT HEAL and then
HE DIED.
STOP IT NOW!!!!!
I pull my hair a lot and this helped me stop pulling my hair thanks!
I started pulling my scalp hair since i was 14 (now 58), started getting bald spots on the one side and top of my head. I was so ashamed of it I never thought I could stop. I' ve been struggling with this disorder for so many years, feeling ashamed, isolated and lonely. Do wigs help at all to stop doing it??? Wishing everyone to overcome it.
I have trichotillomania, it started at age 7 when my mom and stepdad got married and they started abusing me. It was a form of coping with the pain but brought a strange sense of pleasure (for the moment). Now as an adult I have removed the majority of the things that would trigger me. I don't have the triggers as often but there are certain things that have occurred during my military career and previous marriage that creep up certain times of the year. I have standard poodles. They help me with my emotions and I love on them and run my hands through their curls. Because they have hair that feels very similar to my curls it helps, plus they get free rubs and loving. I am sad to know that so many people suffer with this, but it's comforting to know that I am not some freak show that deals with it alone...Hugs and healing... 🐩💓😊
My trich began at age 12. My parents would drop my sister and I off at my Uncle and Aunt who fought like wild animals. My sisters nose would began to bleed (Maybe she just had a nose bleed and that is what I recall) and I remember pulling the first hair and getting that white bulb root. It was the most satisfying things I had ever felt at age 12. It actually was both painful and pleasurable. I pulled till I had many thin areas of hair, mainly on the top of my head. I would collect the hairs I pull as a way to deter me from pulling again. That did not work well. My doctor said as long as I was not eating my hair he did not want to put me on meds. He prescribed learning origami, particularly unit origami, where you make the same piece many times to complete one unit of something. Indeed this helped tremendously. I have learned to fold many beautiful and complex models of origami. But I must be careful not to allow frustration in folds I can't get because I could begin to pull due to that. But otherwise learning to occupy my hands is something that helps. Ha, you are not alone. My family thought I was crazy when I told them how it felt "oh so good" the pain and pleasure all mixed into one. My hair has permanently thinned in the top, but thank goodness I have kinky hair which can hide the sparse mixture. Only if I blow dry and straighten it can you tell I have picked one to many hairs. 😊
EarthAngel
Rather than talking about it....here's an idea.....GET HELP.
Seek out a caring professional and take the proper meds❤
@@joannaedwards6325 I am getting help and I don't need poison to mask my issues. I'm not sure if you thought your response was helpful but it wasn't. Please be mindful of who and what you are saying to people you don't know, especially when it comes to trauma and mental health. Have a nice day.
I have skin picking and I have a bunch of crystals bc I collect them and I just an idea to play with and feel texture of the crystals instead of picking. Thanks for the tip!! I’m gonna try it all day today
Thank you so much for this video. My skin picking has always been minor and paired with other things like nail biting and nose picking, so I didn't think much of it. But now I'm picking my skin so bad I know I will have permanent scars if I ever let them heal. I haven't had the courage to bring it up in therapy yet. I am going straight to that worksheet. thank you so much
Thanks for this! I developed a bad hair pulling habit when I worked in a call center that followed me after I left that awful job. I'm definitely going to apply these steps to stop that habit.
We Appreciate you Dr. Marks
Thank you!
Thank you for this video! I've started my compulsive hair pulling again, not sure what started this behavior again; so happy for your tips!❤
did all she listed in the video and more, senyding this to my mom because she thinks that I could just stop doing this at any point, and so yeah tysm for the video. XD
If you work from home or don't have anyone to watch you and tell you when you are engaging in the habit, you can video yourself with your phone or web cam.
Had tricottilomania for 50 years did two sessions of EFT and stopped after 20 mins 😊 get in touch i now have a great full head of hair ❤
Dammit, why does it not worked for me?
Thank u. I developed this disorder on my head 2 years ago. I am Determined to beat this!!!
Thank you so much Dr. Tracey! I pick my fingers something awful, cuticles and fingertips too... my index finger is all calloused over and bc the skin has thickened and it makes me want to pick more...
I've had trichotillomania since I was a young child. Off and on. Went years without plucking, now I'm back at it for 7 years. It's horrible. My hair won't grow back now now that I'm older. Fake nails help to stop me from picking, so I need to go get fake nails. So basically started picking around 7-10 yrs of age, stopped in my teenage yrs and through my twenties, mid 30's I picked it back up again.
Thank you so much, holding/wrapping a soft cord around my fingers while feeling bored/watching tv has kept me from plucking.🙏🏻😊!
Thank you for this, I have the hair pulling issue. I'm going to try the yarn for my busy hands
Good luck to you I hope it works out.😊
I have this bad habbit of pulling my hair... even sometimes i do not want to but can't resist... that dopamine it give...ufff i thought its just me
Thank you Dr...from INDIA ❤
I've had some success from wearing something relatively frictionless on my thumb, for example, cutting up a polythene (not rubber) glove so that the only digit actually covered is the thumb. This allows me to keep typing/working unhindered, but eliminates 'grippiness' (traction) on the left thumb so that I'm not able to pull out any hair (in my case, beard hair). As soon as I recognize I'm pulling, I can stop myself and, because of the thumb-glove, I don't lose any hairs before I 'wake up' to the behavior.
I really hope you guys will try this and that it will help you out. Much love.
What a great video!! I have trichotillomania as well as dermatillomania and I definitely use Vaseline on my fingers for skin picking and try to wear headscarves and hats when I’m relaxing or laying in bed to keep me from pulling out my hair. I love all of this!
congratulations for reaching the milestone of 1 MILLION subscribers 👏👏👏🎊🎉 , congratulations for your hard work, perseverance, for helping so many people, me included .
Thank you for this video. Will definitely work on being more aware of when and why I pick.
I love your work. You as a person, your energy. You are an amazing individual for making people like me more able to discern between worry and actual mental issues
Thank you! Make a yarn bracelet with beads to twirl in your fingers. Using different yarn textures.
👍🏽 you got it!
@@DrTraceyMarks I've been dealing with skin picking and hair pulling for years.
This is such useful information and presented in a clear, helpful manner. I have picked at my cuticles and skin around my finger tips for a very long time, at least 30 years (I'm 56 now). I'll recruit my wife's help to apply the Habit Reversal Training practices. Thanks for the inspiration and encouragement.
I bought fidget toys to discourage scalp picking but this will be helpful to get into the habit of using them.
Thank you Dr.Marks for your time and consideration, I'm trying to get my son to watch your videos he needs help but but want see a Dr., again thank you.
Thank-you so much. I’ve twisted & pulled my hair since I’ve had hair & I’m 55.
I pick at my scalp like crazy, I can tell my hair is thinning because of it. It's just so hard to stop. I noticed that when I get acrylic nails, I don't pick as much. It's just not as satisfying. Not the best solution but it helps me stop when it gets bad.
Timely (again). I've had a fingerless mitt on my hand for the past two days. Every day for the past couple of years it was getting so sore with open wounds that I couldn't bear to get it wet. But then I would have to. I'd put moisturising cream on it before sleep but the next day I would pick at it again. I used to do it when I was around people. Picking inside my palm was easy to conceal. I had to do something and with the group of people I supported as my work any kind of stimming or fidgeting causes issues. But I've been off work for a year and do it when I'm on my, which is almost all the time. A stimmy shoe lace helps but having just watched the video I also realise now that I also bite my lip and want to stop that too. It was an accident that I started doing that but it's become a compulsion. It's when it gets sore that I first realise I've actually been doing it for a while.
wow. i have eczema and i intuitively did these exact step to trying to fix it. I didn't do them in that order but i did everything on this list - that's wild, lol. At least now i know names for the steps i took and can implement them more concretely in the future
Thanks for making a video of how to diagnosed hair pulling I have been doing it for awhile
Thank you for sharing and taking the time for the printout. Ur knowledge and support has helped me in a few areas. You are appreciated 💚
Thank you so much for this you just saved me booking an appointment with a psych
A professional van prescribe anti OCD meds that can help you!!!!
I'm 45 yrs old, have MANY of these symptoms,and so do both of my children.If you suppress one, something else WILL come up to replace it( sometimes even vocal "tics"). So,I try and think of more socially acceptable alternatives...put little pieces of rough Velcro under desk, keep a quarter in pocket to rub edge, etc. and don't worry if you catch yourself pulling/picking/ biting. Just gently try your new habit.
Stop worrying is right.
But do consider GETTING PROFESSIONAL HELP before an annoying little habit grows into a deadly condition❤
Thank you for this video! I will try your advices! I’m picking my fingers skin and want to stop it.
I literally needed this!
This is so helpful. I think i actually did this type of behavior when i finally quit smoking cold turkey (swapped menthol cigarettes for mint gum). I definitely going to try putting this into play to help me quit picking at my face.
When I was 7 I got into plucking my eyelashes to the point I plucked just about all of them. The habit came back in highschool when I started growing facial hair. Plucking facial hair was minimal until I started growing a full beard. Now I do it all the time and it's making the beard patchy. Thought I was alone in this, thank you.
I have a tendency the pick the inside of my lips with my teeth, and sometimes pull eyelashes and eyebrows for loose hairs. This was a helpful vid, thanks
You’re welcome
I clicked as soon as i saw. I broke out in hives from anxiety two years ago and have been scratching and picking since 😭