Thank you to everyone for your comments and love for this film. The reaction has blown me away considering this was just made as a passion project and uploaded with no expectation. It goes to show how much this topic resonates and needs to be spotlighted. We’re now expanding this short into a feature-length documentary, exploring new stories, new voices and wanting to spotlight the stigma still surrounding men’s mental health on a much deeper level. Keep your eyes peeled in the not so distant future. Thank you again!
I grew up in a house with my mom and dad and four older brothers who were my heroes. Being the only girl and the youngest, I got to see how my brothers were treated at school and by people in general just because they're boys. The affection and kindness and loads of extra help I got because I'm a girl were all denied my brothers. Just because they're guys. Teachers adored me, praised me, encouraged me. At best, they ignored my brothers--all who're at least as "school smart" as me. And in their relationships... One of my brothers had a university scholarship revoked after a girl accused him of sexually assaulting her--even after a long and expensive trial when she admitted she'd lied b/c he broke up with her. The college never offered him back his scholarship despite his winning the case. Since high school I've been speaking out about this but no one cares to listen. Everywhere, boys are portrayed as these stupid, gruff monsters. In the media, in schools, in the workforce. It's one reason I've decided not to have kids. Being born a boy today is being born an automatic second-class citizen always suspect in the eyes of the law, the courts, schools, social services, and the community. And when we learn boys and men commit more suicides, what do we say? That it's men's fault for not reaching out, for not taking care of themselves. That it's the result of "toxic masculinity." Gawd. To all you guys out there, there are girls who see what's happening to you and who advocate for you.
Now if you can make other women stand up and have the same determination to change their spiteful ways towards all men just because they exist, and see that not every man is a selfish war mongering rapist that wants to use their bodies or see women as lower than them. So many of us gone through life being told that we will have the weight of the world on our shoulders and could do anything, but it wasn’t the case, and we managed to meet a lot of people along the way, and some became long time friends and others just used and abused us because of our kindness and trust, and those were the types that started to open our eyes and see who people really were and what the real world around us was really like. So many people go through life and lie, cheat and steal, and still manage to get everything that they want, and some of us work hard our whole lives and do the right things and still never manage to get all the things that we always fought hard for, and as we get older our strength and health starts to grow weaker and we aren’t in the best shape to keep working hard at the pace that we used to and while all that is happening, you start to not see the long time friends that you made along the way because you are all so busy and they start families of their own. Life is tough for men everywhere, and when you can’t even get up and walk two feet away from your chair or bed just to pick up your phone or video game controller anymore, you know that’s it’s close to that time for you already and that those days of you being in peak athletic physical condition because of always playing sports like basketball, baseball or football are long over now, and they are never coming back. As good as we were to all people our whole lives while also being physically and mentally tough enough to get up every single day for years to push ourselves to go to work at grueling jobs that we used to love at first, but then grew to hate as we got older, we still shuffled our way through and did our absolute best. We still are hated by a vast majority of women just because we exist, and the very funny thing is that a lot of these women are still just college kids fresh out of high school that never even had the courage to jump onto daily transportation all hours of a day just to get to their jobs, schools or to see friends and family. They would probably quit after working just a couple hours of the first day of a company work shift. They don’t know the first thing about what true struggle and survival really is yet.
Thank you for sharing your story. I really encourage everyone to do that, and it's great when videos (be that fiction or documentary) gets people doing that. Well done, everyone.
Try dating a depressed guy. And make him not not depressed. If you really mean your words . Try dating a guy who is poor asf . Who is a complete loser . Will you? I don't think so.
Welcome to the world my friend, no one gives a fuck about anything anymore. We live in an egocentric, self-absorbed society. Empathy is void. Watching this video made me feel something deeper than sadness, I connect to these men on a much greater level than words can describe. Shame 95% of the world can't do the same.
Holy Shit that bloke just hit the nail on the head when he said "it's like ur in a room and everyone you love outside, you can see then through the window and all u have to do is open the door but you cant" from a 33yo father of 3, Spouse, Son, brother etc. Its So hard.
I've had times where things are hard and the question I find myself asking is "Who'd actually miss me if I disappeared?". I asked myself that very question this morning. A few days ago my girlfriend left me. We work together. As far as I know to myself I didn't really do anything wrong. I loved her with all of me. I never once raised my voice to her or deliberately made her feel bad about herself. Everyone at work is messaging her and asking how she is... 2 male members of staff have asked if I'm ok. Everyone else assumes it was my fault.
I've been a weed addict for 5 years, now i'm 22 and i've been 1 month without it, i started to study something i really like for the first time in my life on september, i started to do exercise and trainings 4 times a week, i started to meditate, i started to be much more organized and disciplined, i started to meet new good people from my school after a few years without meeting new people, i started getting more confortable with girls again, (since 2019 i don't kiss or have sex with any), and i feel much better but at the same time i feel much more sensitive because I am in the most emotionally intense period of my life where there has been a lot of improvement in a single month and sometimes I find it difficult to handle it and keep improving, I opened up a lot with my best friend and I cried with him but still I think that I need talk more with my family because I only show them the beautiful part and everything that I am improving this month but I don't feel emotionally stable, i still need to quit cigars, caffeine, sugar and porn to get better phisically and mentally but i'm sure i'm going to get even better at the end of this year and become the men i want soon
Hey as someone who has similar story im proud of you. What i can say is that maybe you can go at your own pace dont rush it because rushed things dont last usually. I hope we can all be happy again, lots of love to everyone!
My brother committed suicide 1953-1982. I wished he had watched a video like yours. 💔 Please continue... Blessings to you and yours from Rhode Island. Peace
God I as a man from India I can feel all this. I was treated as a physically and mentally weaker individual since my school days by sadistic teachers and then mentally pressured by my relatives but now I feel like I am used to many of these feelings and at some stage in my life I did feel each of these problems I also felt of not being alive was better many times. But you know I recognized things and moved on myself rather than obsessing over my past. Thanks to my really supportive parents and their unlimited care and love. But I can feel to those who didn't have parents or close people in their life. The pain and depression might compound and make them break. It's so hard sometimes. We need to address these issues globally. But when the world will shift it's focus from religion, politics and all other non sense stuff around.
This subject matter is incredibly important to me and just the start of the journey towards normalising the portrayal of men’s mental health. Thank you for the comment. 😊
The last part where the person says that when we are thinking of suicide, it is to remove ourselves from the equation as we see ourselves as a burden to those people, that is what I struggle with the most. I don't end myself due to religious reasons. But man if I wasn't religious, I would have been dead 7 years ago. This feeling of always taking others feelings into consideration and pushings my own behind is just so heavy at times, especially when it comes to family and your own personal interests. I feel like, instead of just being a dissapointment to my mother and sisters or my fiancee, I'll just try to take myself out of the equation and make it easy for them to move on in life. A life without disappointment. I can't shed a single tear in front of anyone. The last time that happened was 5 years ago when my father passed away. I cried for 15 minutes holding my sister in my arms. Wiped my tears and put on a brave face for my family. I can only ever cry in solitude. My tears immediately stop as soon as someone turns the corner and all feelings go away in that moment. I guess it is some sort of defense mechanism. Last time I was about to cry because my mum would disturb me so much while I was working from home and it was hindering my concentration on my work (self employed) that it was affecting the money coming in as well. I got to hear from her for not earning enough. Not "helping" her when she asked. I couldn't take it anymore and I had a shaky voice and almost had tears welling up as I tried to explain to her that her constant interferance during my working hours is what is leading to my lesser income, she immediately said "Stop crying". That sadness in me immediately turned to anger and I yelled "So what? Is anger better? Should I start yelling?". I hated myself in that moment. I hated what she said. I hated that I was suffocating and I still am. I'm sorry for sharing all this, I don't know why I wrote all of this. I don't know where I'm going with this. I just really want my life to end. Like, die on a good note soon. I just keep listening and am never able to talk.
You said this because you have the strength and voice to share what many can relate to rn and rn we need that community, and togetherness. The feeling we are not alone but experiencing the same things though miles apart, different circumstances, different ages, and so on. Thank you for sharing, thank you for bringing us that read this closer to freedom from these overwhelming feelings. All the best brother and again ty for speaking it helps us all.
I've had well over a decade of mental health problems stemming from childhood trauma. Last autumn I set up a men's mental health peer support group in my local town, and it's going well. I set it up to help others - which it is doing - but it's helping me too. And it was pretty straightforward to get up and running.
Thank you for making this film. It is truly comforting to know that I'm not the only one who deals with this anxiety and suicidal ideation on a daily basis.
It’s so common, but so uncommonly spoke about - it can feel incredibly isolating. You are absolutely not alone. Thank you for your comment and bravery.
I needed this right now. As a man that isolates and withdraws, I feel completely alone most of the time. Even if I'm not alone on the occasions when I do socialize and crawl out of my hole, I'm never really there. I can't trust anyone to actually listen and understand me. At best, I get home and feel relieved that no one actually 'saw' me, because i hid it well enough. Being real with people is the worst; the common passive comments of people are usually so destructive. And being told to "man up" is the most destructive of them all. Do you really want men to take their hurt and channel it into more aggressive, toxic, and violent behaviour? Because that's how you destroy a man's empathy and turn him into a savage. The allure of the abandon is intoxicating to think of; to actually feel power instead of absolute powerlessness. "He who make's a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man." I've always felt like this quote is a perfect example of this duality. We ARE beasts, yet we are a civiliation that seems to put high emphasis on ignoring our animalistic nature and favoring empathy instead. Survival of the fittest IS the ultimate law of nature and as a civilization we seem to strive to go completely against that. Thou shall not kill, thou shall not steal, thou shall not covet thy neighbours wife, and the billion other civil LAWS we have accepted as a civilization for the greater good; they all go against the laws of nature. We are led to believe you don't need to be the strongest to be a successful man, you don't need to be the smartest to be a successful man, you just have to follow the rules. A male lion does not feel guilty for killing the wildebeast, it does not feel guilty for fighting another male for the chance to mate with the pride's females, it does not feel guilty for mercilesslessly killing the infant males of the pride so instead his coming offspring will flourish. No, he feels powerful and master of his destiny, successful in life. So how, if we are so civilized, do i see the most successful people being the ones that ignore civil law and just TAKE what they want from people. Our whole civilization seems like a scam to favor the beasts, while fooling the empaths into being taken advantage of. So if THAT really is how our society works, survival of the fittest, the physically strongest and smartest people get to feel powerful and successful by depressing other peoples success. Power corrupts people. And we constantly see people in positions of power selfishly taking full advantage of it. This is the truth. So despite being physically fit and smarter than the average person, my empathy has lead to me to being an unsuccessful man. I COULD be a powerful man. At the most extreme I could kill those that threaten me, take the stuff and things I want to improve my life, rape women who reject me; I could be a perfectly content man in the real world. But instead I chose empathy. I choose to take other peoples feelings seriously because I know all too well about the pain and don't want to perpetuate it. Instead i take my blows and rejection and ridicule for my sensitivities as a man, and i suffer in silence. Every day I choose to be a good compassionate person, and everyday I go to bed hurting and struggling with this question; how much more hurt can i tolerate before I succumb to the sadness, or let the beast out of the cage so i can survive. And i hate myself for even contemplating it.
I will tell you that you ARE all alone, it isn't merely a feeling. I will never forget how the people were to me when I reached out. At the end of the day your seen as a resource, nothing more
Compassion goes both ways mate. Being compassionate doesn't mean turning yourself into a punching bag. Sometimes it's an absolute must to set boundaries and be compassionate to yourself as well. Finding balance between those two things is the hard part. Stay strong and remember to treat yourself with kindness too.
8:30 hit me the hardest.. because when I have been at my lowest, the thoughts of how much of a burden I am on everyone else feels so true.. that I’m only doing bad for my family and friends when I don’t intend to, I’m just marked, broken, cursed, unfixable, unlovable. The only things that kept me from going beyond that were my 2 year old son who may grow up in a crazy, dangerous world without his father to protect him and guide him, and also all of the other men in this world who suffer in silence along with me, who awkwardly laugh and shrug off our deepest shame and pain in front of everyone, but in moments of silence our innermost thoughts we don’t let anyone know about bring so much hurt, pain and suffering that the mere thought of an escape from that pain, as horrible as it sounds and is, is almost strangely comforting, and that is the trap that our people fall into. I need to stay alive so that I can spread the kindness I’m able to share with the world in the smallest ways every single day, so that I can hope that my small gestures will help someone else, stranger or friend, from allowing themselves to fall into that inescapable, irreversible trap that our own mind lies to us about to comfort us. More people need to see this video.. because it most accurately depicts and provides a small glimpse into the intense suffering I feel inside, and that all of my brothers on this world feel inside, that goes unnoticed.
The worst thing is when you have issues with your friends. You can’t really talk to them because you know they still hang out with people who were mean to you. Or they’re too busy within their own lives to bother to schedule a real hang out or anything. And any group hangout involves people you can’t stand. Trying to find a friend as an adult these days in person is like finding a needle in a haystack...
I've tried suicide several times in the past. Failed each time because of fear. I still think and hope I one day get the courage to follow through. I have chronic recurring depression and anxiety. Anyway, my mind hopes and wish that my family or friends will not get burdened or feel grief if I die. Why is that? Would I think like that if I was a woman? One time I called emergency because of my mental state. An ambulance came with the most amazing personell ever. When driving me to the hospital I apologized for wasting their time. The medic I was talking to said: You should not apologize, talking to you was the best experience we've had tonight. Yet I felt and feel guilty I do not want to burden anyone. Is this man thing? I think many of us have seen/heard "women and children first" (You have probably also seen Titanic). But why am I less worth as an adult male than when I was a boy? I'm still the same person inside and I still remember being a boy. When did my value diminish?
Being Jewish, I will answer your question with another question which I also want to confront my family with : Assumed we all had cancer of some sorts, would we be willing to spend 50,000$ on treatments ? Why not then on our mental health ?
"Well it looks like collectively breaking the spirit of man may have worked too well, let's pretend to give a shit now that we've about thrown the last shovel full on their casket."
I am 66 . I have felt disconnected over half that time. Everything said here i agree with and have experienced those feelings myself . I still feel that way at times. Now i meditate , i see a counsellor , i exercise , i read and try and accept this mindset and i float around that feeling like mist over a stone . There is always a long way to go but there is joy sometimes .
Honestly man, more people need to talk about men's health. As of posting this comment, I'm 16 years old, I have symptoms of depression, sociopathy, suicidal thoughts, and social anxiety to the point I can't even look at random people whenever I go outside. I'm also a victim of emotional abuse, mental abuse, physical abuse, racial discrimination, and bullying. I have older two sisters who you can classify as "feminists" and parents who aren't supportive, don't understand the concept of mental health, and have preferential treatment towards my sisters. It's true when they say that men are no longer unconditionally love once they are no longer infants or toddlers. (I think you guys can imagine a bit of what I've gone through). All of it started when I was 3 and it's still ongoing until now, honestly at first I wanted to make this comment how I've turned out like this, and all their wrongdoings, but that'll be too long and I can write a book with that amount. In the last 9 years, I've used videogames as my distraction and relief, and I've started to play gacha games (don't worry I haven't spent anything nor do I plan to) because they present me a reality that I long for, a person who's loved, desired, and encouraged by those around him. I always cry by myself, telling no one about anything, putting on a facade around my "family," I've felt so hollow for so long, sometimes I even laugh because of shit my life is, and even cry while holding a knife in my hand, while contemplating whether or not to do it. and online school is still a thing here, and it's forecasted to go for at least 1 or 2 more years, if you're a parent and you're still miraculously reading this comment. There are things that your children especially young boys, won't open up to you about unless you give them an environment and give them the encouragement that it's okay to be vulnerable and to feel down at times. As for the feminist, don't keep generalizing men because of a small minority of shit men, and stop jumping onto bandwagons before using your brain first to formulate your own opinion.
You're incredibly eloquent my brother. Sometimes our background and upbringing and social circumstance just conspires against us. But it is possible to find some kind of way through.
@johnottway8074 Thanks man, seeing this pop up in my notifications really takes me back. The last part of my comment makes me cringe haha. Nowadays, I like to think to I'm in a better place now. Made some genuine friends, learning Japanese, focus more into my love of music, and got better at singing. My relationship with my family is okay, but they know I'm not exactly happy with them. I've accepted that I am who I am because of my experiences and scars that I bare, and that's okay. For now though I'll see if music takes off while I'm in college but if not I'm pretty alright with my career path. I plan to move into Japan within a decade and settle down there. I still have a plan for my pursuit of happiness even if music doesn't work out for me. And if there's someone out there struggling out there, fight with every fiber of your being, claw your way through if you have to. Remember, it's not over till you've reached the end.
This is a bit too close to home for me mate. Can honestly say pretty much resonate with all those voices. Very well put together piece of art for us broken men. So bravo for giving a platform for men to speak. I had an epiphany the other day, When you hear and see podcasts where people talk for hours at a time. I’m not sure the last time I had a conversation that lasted for more than 20-30mins max. I’m a loner, virtually no close friends most have drifted away, I have learning difficulties, close classmate died by suicide when we were 12yrs old, have social anxiety from being bullied, I have suicidal thoughts, had an volatile absent father & a dismissive avoidant step father who would quite happily without talking to me, unless I spoke to him for something mundane, always felt like it was a chore and I got that feeling from him like it was an irritation for me needing anything from him. He was & is always busy doing something. Never shown any interest in me, to teach me anything & never had an encouraging word from either of them. Lost boy kinda feeling still trying to work though what being a man is. but I know you have to generate your own self worth otherwise those things take control. Constant negative spiralling thoughts. It’s a daily battle.
Two years after this video is posted and it still hasn't hit 100K views. That's such a shame and that number needs to be higher. Thank you for making this documentary.
its all about women this days, no one cares and even if you search about men mental health in youtube, you would understand from video's views that no one even CARES. Feminazis destroyed everything
Im a 25yearold. I always question my self worth. Questions that i will never get from anyone, i have to get my own answer. A journey where i love being alone. Im not lonely, i just need someone who cares, love, and comfort. Being a man is at stake. Nobody cares, nobody is concern enough. The answer is out there gentleman. Keep moving forward. Keep yourself occupied.
I suffered a mental breakdown due to a relationship break-up, while still in a high profile computing career... the pressure (internal) to continue looking and behaving as 'normal' led to other emotional cracks and swings of outburst... Looking back all those years and with a lot of deeper research, in those times, while not being able to explain (to oneself nor others) 'what's going on inside you', I had to work hard to just 'get away' or keep others away from me, in case my outburst (as oft did) got taken as direct anger at that person.. .. like I would infect them with what was going on inside me, so keeping away was best..... And the other half of you wants to make things OK for them while the claustrophobic like urge to yell and thrash about still eats at the other half of you.... When you can understand at least 'what needs to happen' in a moment, rather than understand or fix 'the problem' at least you can interrupt tthe process, which additionally of course can become habitual, behaviourally and neurologically. Happy to connect with anyone also struggling here, from my insights over 30+ years and coming out the other side, without institutionalisation nor medication....
Thank you, Mr White, I really needed this video. My high school brothers betrayed me, left with no friends, got rejected from university, tried it again, got it but had to wait over 2 years because of quarantine. Over 2 years of procastination and dream catching eroded my mind and my OCD and ADHD got worse. Got depressed in and out for over a year, non stop for 4 months, withdraw for society, spaced out from my girl to protect her because I was shutting off. She got tired of me being in my hole and the toxicity that came with it, broke up. After 3 years of putting her before anything else, including my mental health (Protected her and consoled her 60 seconds after getting out of the bathroom trying to recover form the worst mental colapse I've had -cryed until didn't have more tears, felt like a spectator in my own head-) and still, after all the love, after all the dedication, after all the bumps and shit we had gone thru, mutually thinking that after every dark time together our relationship got even stronger, because it did, she didn't want to try it again, didn't want me anymore. Begged her to just give the chance to make her fall in love with me again, from scratch, she denied. Just friends if I promised to not make drama if she dated anyone. I'm gonna focuse on me, on my goals, on my physique, strengthening my mind, conquering my head. I'm gonna grind my way up. You can do it brothers, we will all make it, reject modernity, reject simping, embrace yourself, improve yourself. One day at a time
We live in a period where mental health is still seen as a dogma, something that cannot be talked about and should not be talked about. Where man is seen as an indestructible thing capable of enduring whatever happens. Videos like this should be seen all over the world. Sincere congratulations.
The only way I could describe the feeling of watching this video and hearing all these guys talk about their experiences was how unknowingly I felt like it's happened to me for so many years, how i've suppressed these feelings because nobody cared or rather the feeling of nobody caring. About loneliness, the constant anxiety and stress about having terrible thoughts I never dared to act on because I knew it would hurt those I love more than it would me. It was a pleasant feeling, a sense of belonging for the first time in a long time and I hope more men will see this and feel the same way I did.
As challenging as it may be, one can find satisfaction in life. Build yourself into a man of character and strength, a man of his word and master some useful skills that you can put in the service of others and you will have a fulfilling life. If you are interested in topics related to manhood and masculinity, feel free to challenge yourself with some ideas on the Mastery Order Channel and, of course, challenge back if you have other points of view. Looking forward to your opinions. All the best to you!
The amount of times that's has helped people surly isn't low, I appreciate the effort I just am also pissed at the injustice men face. Fuck stigma. Thanks fellow.
Nothing in my life has explained how I feel, better than this video has. I am my own worst enemy. But I'm a great listener and an even better friend. I'll be here for you. Any of you. Because life is worth living.
Reach out to someone? Why? Everyone I know has many other people to hang out or simply contact online and every single person of them is much more interesting, every single one is much more worthy a conversation and pleasant to be around than I am. And most of times I actually reach out I know I am bothering them, they will not say that, but I know I am so I limit contact to necessary or completely cut off and fade away
I feel every single word you wrote. That makes you way more interesting than all those shallow, forcefully positive people that are blind to the hollowness of their lives.
end feminism in India sis, if you really want to help men a feminist video gets millions of views, and this ? this got just 35k in almost 2 years.... feminism has made most women the same old monsters, as patriarchy once made men, but feminism is doing this as a slow poison.... I am happy though, atleast your husband and son in the future might live a good life....
Fight, fight like hell to make out voices heard! We are told from a young age to just ‘man up’ and even in a supposed woke world are struggles are still swept under the rug. Reach out to your fellow brothers and make sure hey are doing ok. If not us than who? Hope of you are reading this you are doing good and if not seriously reach out. You are not alone in this fight!! I promise you that.
Great documentary!! So very important to try and understand struggles and how the public is stuck in the 20's. I lost my brother 4 years ago, he took his life, and wow...the hurt, anger, sadness, and just devastation it leaves behind. Its ok to not be ok!! Thanks
I dont think depression ever leaves you. You can manage it and resist it but there's no long term cure. But there is hope and you can have lots of good days in between the bad ones. The key is to stay hopeful and keep fighting it.
every time ive ever opened up to anyone it has always backfired, I used to trust really easily and when i got extremely depressed because i was being constantly threatened to be bashed by a group of 19-20 year olds while I'm in highschool, i was extremely self conciouse about my weight, also i was being mentally abused at home and none of my friends ever tried to help but instead just made fun of me for it. Once i decided to open up to my best mate out of all of them, he's trusted me with plenty of secrets that i still have not shared so i decided to trust him enough with my depression and mental state, i even cried in front of him, and he was nice at the time but as soon as he got home he told everyone and then i got constant messages making fun of me, calling me a cry baby, telling me that no one gives a fuck because everyone has a sob story! This has happened 5 times now and its from different "friends" and even girls that i was interested in. After the 5th time i stopped even talking to people for a long while, i fell into the worst depression of my life and got very close to suicide many times but never did it because i didn't want to burden my family of that horror. I was constantly in this state of mind for months, never spoke to anyone but without realising it i became a hollow shell of my oldself and couldn't even recognise myself in the mirror anymore! It wasn't until one day, i was lying in bed and when i looked down i saw my massive stomach hanging out, i was disgusted, angry, confused on why i cant be happy and why no one cares about me! Right then is when i figured out that if i didn't do anything i would end up dead soon so i remembered what it felt like when i used to workout and then my brain clicked into place, "if i cant control how people think of me or what others do then i might as well not care for anyone but myself" i then started to workout everyday, eat super clean and got my act right, ive now had plenty of extremely attractive women flirt with me and the fact that i dont feel like i need them anymore is CRAZY! i used to dream for just one girl to like me back and now i have some of the hottest chicks ive seen flirting with me and instead of trying to get with them, i think first and see if they are even a good match. No one has been for me yet so ive backed off and rejected them, nothing wrong with ignoring the world to get yourself better! STAY STRONG KING!!!
Women have social circles where we can openly talk about our feelings without judgement. I encourage my male friends to not only be open with me but to be open with their male friends. Some of my guy friends will say "uuuj guys don't do that" and I wish there was more i could do to stop that mentality. Also the mental health system to reach out and get help is incredibly difficult. Bless, this is something we need to be bringing attention to.
I'm here to share mine I suffer from anxiety and depression and I have a thing to constantly please people which is why I suffer a lot, I'm not the kinda person who would avoid you cause you're mean or stupid, I'll always be there for you when you're at a low point in your life cause I know how it feels when no one's around when you're at your worst, sometimes I feel empty inside and suddenly I get the urge to cry out loud, these things always keep me on edge that's when my anxiety kicks in..... My depression is the only that's with me from the beginning, from an young age I got no love from family nor I have the social ability to make friends, which is why I constantly fight with myself to please people for their attention, but the one thing I like about myself is when I get knocked out or at my worst I don't get any suicidal thoughts (Tbh yeah sometimes I do get those thoughts) but the thing is I always look at my problems and say "Try me" cause my mentality is if it hurts you, you should kill it, so people mock me or knock me down but I get back up and fight for success
I'm here before this blows up or gets recommended by the youtube algorithm. Well done, great title, good usage of the footage and narration. hugs to every man who's out there whether you have a similar or a smaller problem. You are not alone
@@JonnyWhite Absolutely my friend...as a fellow Filmmaker, I admire your work a lot and aspire to becoming my own cinematographer. I'm going to try it out in the next couple of months and see how I feel.
As someone who struggles with both depression as well as other disabilities this really does express how myself and so many others feel thank you for making this film.
Women depression is one thing, but depressed men is another thing. Women suffering by thing that relatively known instead they sometimes has no another option. Bun men, there is soo much thing that can make one prone, yet lot of them still unknown. Like once man said "women and children can be careless, but not men"
If you like challenging ideas and if mastery and masculinity are also subjects that interest you, I invite you to explore the videos shared on the Mastery Order Channel to challenge yourself with some ideas about manhood and to become the kind of man you would admire and look up to. We can only better ourselves together, as men among men, so I invite you to use what I share and, of course, share your own opinions so that others can benefit from them as well. Looking forward to your points of view. All the best to you!
Very well done. Powerful and sublime.I've certainly had my own history of mental health and addiction issues. I'm in a much better place today and have been since 2019. A lot of it came down to discovering mindfulness meditation, as well as walking in groups. Having a regular sleep schedule (even when out of work). Tying to eat even just a bit more healthier. Watching/listening/reading lots of informative and entertaining content, like this video as just one of many examples. Stay strong, my fellow men. The world needs us
this was a touching documentary, there's a lot of content here I can relate to. Thank you for spreading awareness on this issue. Can you please do a documentary on male victims of psychological abuse and sexual abuse?
bless you for getting this out there.. The world needs more people like you..We are never alone.. however we think.. perhaps the greatest healing is when we turn the ME around to WE...? Mercy
Smash the like button. Great video. As a person with mental anxiety issues, female I help my male partner get through his rough days the best I can. I cannot stress enough that I have been so tired trying to convince him to get help but he will not go. I can only wish now that making my life enough he will see that he is important and find the self love to go to therapy or to get a diagnosis. Denial is wonderful but for the partner it is like watching someone die a little each day. The pain for both is real. Men need to keep openly talking and sharing so they have support in their communities. Self loving your self love is so important. You just never know what impact you could have on another's life. Gratitude for the video. ❤❤
I’m sure no one will read this, but the best way I could describe depression is picture a pool party on a beautiful summers day, everyone is laughing and there’s music playing and everyone is just having a good time, with family, friends, wife or husband, but while the party is goin on you are the only one in the pool, and you are in the deep end with anchors tied around your ankles, you scream you fight to swim up but you just can’t, the party (life) is going on without you, not even a couple feet away, but you are stuck, suffocating while everyone else is enjoying the party, enjoying each other’s company….:no able to hear your underwater screams, and even if they couple it’s not their problem, they have their own life to live at the party, they gotta watch their kids, or have a few drinks, or dance to the music, or try to get laid hitting on one of the girls in their bikinis……you are so close, life is right in front of you, yet you are drowning alone
Worked at an international bank, singed myself off with stress and the boss seemed surprised. He asked me why I didn't come to him about it first. Dude, YOU were the fucking reason I'm off stressed!!!
Wait, why does this video not have more views, this should be in EVERYONES recomended! We NEED to talk more about mens mental health. I personally have been on the rock bottom for years (This year have been a good year for me) my mother passed away when i was 16 years old, and she was really the only one that i felt comfortable opening up too, she was the one that told me "I love you" I love my father and my father loves me but he was raised in the classic: Don't cry infront of ppl, man up way. He is showing me love in his own way, and thats kinda enough i guess. I got completely numb after my mom died, so i turned myself to video games and alcohol... for years. And during those years more family members passed, and i felt more and more numb/empty and lost. I lost my social skills, still have a hard time keeping eye contact, but its getting better. Im 22 years old today, i got my first job this year. I am currently working out, really trying to better myself. I feel more energized, i don't know how to spell it. Maybe soon in the future i might try out dating, as i never have had an relationship, never have had sex either, but I guess thats normal when you have been inprisoned in your own room for years. I will get better, and im gonna let it take the time it needs. And i believe that if you feel down, speaking to a loved one, a family memeber or a friend that it will help, or i guess i know that it helps. Keep your head up king, its okey to cry, its okey to feel down, it will get better. My excuses if there are some misspelling, I am Swedish so English is not my motherlanguage. ❤❤
Thanks for the comment Ryan, it can be so isolating and scary, making it difficult to ‘live in the moment’ when there’s a sense of almost existential dread. I wish you all the best in your journey.
3 time deployment vet here. For me the hardest part was returning home to no one. No family. No friends. Then at work no one asking how I was feeling. If I was all right, or if I was okay. I began to hurt more when I was at home then when I was deployed. The worst was the holidays. You get numb to the pain after awhile. It becomes everyday, or normal. Then one day something happens, and you realize that it should hurt, but it doesn't. Then you realize you have been in pain for months. Or years. And no one cares, and no one ever did. Even those closest to you. Where to go from here? I don't know. But I wish I did.
For me the constant barrage of negative narrative about men led me to Great Depression. If this was a women’s issue there would be programs and funding but as a man there is nothing other than messages like this that we should talk more. Great message of course but we also need to start acknowledging the male bashing needs to stop and that may go a long way to helping so many
If you like challenging ideas and if mastery and masculinity are also subjects that interest you, I invite you to explore the videos shared on the Mastery Order Channel to challenge yourself with some ideas about manhood and to become the kind of man you would admire and look up to. We can only better ourselves together, as men among men, so I invite you to use what I share and, of course, share your own opinions so that others can benefit from them as well. Looking forward to your points of view. All the best to you!
I always find it interesting and ironic how, in this age of convenience and relative luxury in comparison to our forefathers' plight, people go on record now more than ever discussing how difficult life is. It speaks to man's need to strive and attain via his own will that current societal infrastructure deprives from so many people, but specifically men.
I felt it once in my life it lasted for 5 months I wasn't able to breath properly for first week. My head was like it going to brust. I found it very surprised when I saw happy people that how they are happy. Than I wasted 5 precious months of my life. Now I found myself a different person than what I earlier used to be you know who makes everyone laugh in the group. Well I took it as one of the life experience that will help me in future.
![สาวเมืองเพชร - ธีเดช ทองอภิชาติ [Official MV]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kEt7F9PvO3I/mqdefault.jpg)
Thank you to everyone for your comments and love for this film. The reaction has blown me away considering this was just made as a passion project and uploaded with no expectation. It goes to show how much this topic resonates and needs to be spotlighted.
We’re now expanding this short into a feature-length documentary, exploring new stories, new voices and wanting to spotlight the stigma still surrounding men’s mental health on a much deeper level.
Keep your eyes peeled in the not so distant future.
Thank you again!
I grew up in a house with my mom and dad and four older brothers who were my heroes. Being the only girl and the youngest, I got to see how my brothers were treated at school and by people in general just because they're boys. The affection and kindness and loads of extra help I got because I'm a girl were all denied my brothers. Just because they're guys. Teachers adored me, praised me, encouraged me. At best, they ignored my brothers--all who're at least as "school smart" as me. And in their relationships... One of my brothers had a university scholarship revoked after a girl accused him of sexually assaulting her--even after a long and expensive trial when she admitted she'd lied b/c he broke up with her. The college never offered him back his scholarship despite his winning the case.
Since high school I've been speaking out about this but no one cares to listen. Everywhere, boys are portrayed as these stupid, gruff monsters. In the media, in schools, in the workforce. It's one reason I've decided not to have kids. Being born a boy today is being born an automatic second-class citizen always suspect in the eyes of the law, the courts, schools, social services, and the community. And when we learn boys and men commit more suicides, what do we say? That it's men's fault for not reaching out, for not taking care of themselves. That it's the result of "toxic masculinity." Gawd.
To all you guys out there, there are girls who see what's happening to you and who advocate for you.
Good on you for speaking up.
Now if you can make other women stand up and have the same determination to change their spiteful ways towards all men just because they exist, and see that not every man is a selfish war mongering rapist that wants to use their bodies or see women as lower than them.
So many of us gone through life being told that we will have the weight of the world on our shoulders and could do anything, but it wasn’t the case, and we managed to meet a lot of people along the way, and some became long time friends and others just used and abused us because of our kindness and trust, and those were the types that started to open our eyes and see who people really were and what the real world around us was really like.
So many people go through life and lie, cheat and steal, and still manage to get everything that they want, and some of us work hard our whole lives and do the right things and still never manage to get all the things that we always fought hard for, and as we get older our strength and health starts to grow weaker and we aren’t in the best shape to keep working hard at the pace that we used to and while all that is happening, you start to not see the long time friends that you made along the way because you are all so busy and they start families of their own.
Life is tough for men everywhere, and when you can’t even get up and walk two feet away from your chair or bed just to pick up your phone or video game controller anymore, you know that’s it’s close to that time for you already and that those days of you being in peak athletic physical condition because of always playing sports like basketball, baseball or football are long over now, and they are never coming back.
As good as we were to all people our whole lives while also being physically and mentally tough enough to get up every single day for years to push ourselves to go to work at grueling jobs that we used to love at first, but then grew to hate as we got older, we still shuffled our way through and did our absolute best.
We still are hated by a vast majority of women just because we exist, and the very funny thing is that a lot of these women are still just college kids fresh out of high school that never even had the courage to jump onto daily transportation all hours of a day just to get to their jobs, schools or to see friends and family.
They would probably quit after working just a couple hours of the first day of a company work shift.
They don’t know the first thing about what true struggle and survival really is yet.
University’s will betray you in a second, they don’t care
Thank you for sharing your story. I really encourage everyone to do that, and it's great when videos (be that fiction or documentary) gets people doing that. Well done, everyone.
Try dating a depressed guy.
And make him not not depressed. If you really mean your words . Try dating a guy who is poor asf . Who is a complete loser . Will you? I don't think so.
2.5k views… that‘s how much almost 8 billion people on this world care about mens mental health.
This comment is so underrated.
We care about our mental health ourselves, actually. Except for that, barely any one
Welcome to the world my friend, no one gives a fuck about anything anymore. We live in an egocentric, self-absorbed society. Empathy is void. Watching this video made me feel something deeper than sadness, I connect to these men on a much greater level than words can describe. Shame 95% of the world can't do the same.
only 10k after one year, lol. even my video on my main youtube channel reach 10k in a day
Nah, that’s how much a capitalistic company like TH-cam who created the algorithm does
Holy Shit that bloke just hit the nail on the head when he said "it's like ur in a room and everyone you love outside, you can see then through the window and all u have to do is open the door but you cant"
from a 33yo father of 3, Spouse, Son, brother etc. Its So hard.
Same here Tommy same here... I think I'm just living to make sure my son doesn't turned up like me
May God decrease your pain of all aspects and grant you the best in this world, I hope you've gotten better since this comment was written
I've had times where things are hard and the question I find myself asking is "Who'd actually miss me if I disappeared?". I asked myself that very question this morning. A few days ago my girlfriend left me. We work together. As far as I know to myself I didn't really do anything wrong. I loved her with all of me. I never once raised my voice to her or deliberately made her feel bad about herself. Everyone at work is messaging her and asking how she is... 2 male members of staff have asked if I'm ok. Everyone else assumes it was my fault.
I've been a weed addict for 5 years, now i'm 22 and i've been 1 month without it, i started to study something i really like for the first time in my life on september, i started to do exercise and trainings 4 times a week, i started to meditate, i started to be much more organized and disciplined, i started to meet new good people from my school after a few years without meeting new people, i started getting more confortable with girls again, (since 2019 i don't kiss or have sex with any), and i feel much better but at the same time i feel much more sensitive because I am in the most emotionally intense period of my life where there has been a lot of improvement in a single month and sometimes I find it difficult to handle it and keep improving, I opened up a lot with my best friend and I cried with him but still I think that I need talk more with my family because I only show them the beautiful part and everything that I am improving this month but I don't feel emotionally stable, i still need to quit cigars, caffeine, sugar and porn to get better phisically and mentally but i'm sure i'm going to get even better at the end of this year and become the men i want soon
Thanks for your comment and sharing your story. I wish you all the best in your journey.
Keep the faith and HOPE .
Blessings to you sent from Rhode Island. Peace
Be patient with yourself, you've got this!
Hey as someone who has similar story im proud of you. What i can say is that maybe you can go at your own pace dont rush it because rushed things dont last usually. I hope we can all be happy again, lots of love to everyone!
Keep grinding brother, u can do it, and proud of you to take this step and sticking on it
YOU CAN
My brother committed suicide 1953-1982.
I wished he had watched a video like yours. 💔 Please continue... Blessings to you and yours from Rhode Island. Peace
My condolences 🙏
I'm sorry to hear that man, hope you're doing well now, may he rest in peace
I hope your bro rests easy above. 🙏🏿
This world is awful. I dont know how I'm still holding on.
Don't want to sound mean but who the fuck-especially a male-would want to live in 2024?
This is much needed worldwide as men can also suffer from mental health as men also have emotions and feelings
If you’re ever at a time when you think nobody knows, or nobody cares.
I care.
I really do.
Genuinely appreciated 🙏
God I as a man from India I can feel all this. I was treated as a physically and mentally weaker individual since my school days by sadistic teachers and then mentally pressured by my relatives but now I feel like I am used to many of these feelings and at some stage in my life I did feel each of these problems I also felt of not being alive was better many times. But you know I recognized things and moved on myself rather than obsessing over my past. Thanks to my really supportive parents and their unlimited care and love. But I can feel to those who didn't have parents or close people in their life. The pain and depression might compound and make them break. It's so hard sometimes. We need to address these issues globally. But when the world will shift it's focus from religion, politics and all other non sense stuff around.
I feel you bro.....
Greetings from Western Australia 😂❤
I read your post .
You are so lucky to have parents that are kind and considerate .
Be well my friend.
Thanks for the tenderness with which you've portrayed these men's mental and existential distress.
This subject matter is incredibly important to me and just the start of the journey towards normalising the portrayal of men’s mental health. Thank you for the comment. 😊
This subject touches my heart, too. We could expand on it, if you like. In any case good luck with your work.👍
The last part where the person says that when we are thinking of suicide, it is to remove ourselves from the equation as we see ourselves as a burden to those people, that is what I struggle with the most. I don't end myself due to religious reasons. But man if I wasn't religious, I would have been dead 7 years ago.
This feeling of always taking others feelings into consideration and pushings my own behind is just so heavy at times, especially when it comes to family and your own personal interests. I feel like, instead of just being a dissapointment to my mother and sisters or my fiancee, I'll just try to take myself out of the equation and make it easy for them to move on in life. A life without disappointment.
I can't shed a single tear in front of anyone. The last time that happened was 5 years ago when my father passed away. I cried for 15 minutes holding my sister in my arms. Wiped my tears and put on a brave face for my family. I can only ever cry in solitude. My tears immediately stop as soon as someone turns the corner and all feelings go away in that moment. I guess it is some sort of defense mechanism.
Last time I was about to cry because my mum would disturb me so much while I was working from home and it was hindering my concentration on my work (self employed) that it was affecting the money coming in as well. I got to hear from her for not earning enough. Not "helping" her when she asked. I couldn't take it anymore and I had a shaky voice and almost had tears welling up as I tried to explain to her that her constant interferance during my working hours is what is leading to my lesser income, she immediately said "Stop crying". That sadness in me immediately turned to anger and I yelled "So what? Is anger better? Should I start yelling?". I hated myself in that moment. I hated what she said. I hated that I was suffocating and I still am.
I'm sorry for sharing all this, I don't know why I wrote all of this. I don't know where I'm going with this. I just really want my life to end. Like, die on a good note soon. I just keep listening and am never able to talk.
You said this because you have the strength and voice to share what many can relate to rn and rn we need that community, and togetherness. The feeling we are not alone but experiencing the same things though miles apart, different circumstances, different ages, and so on. Thank you for sharing, thank you for bringing us that read this closer to freedom from these overwhelming feelings. All the best brother and again ty for speaking it helps us all.
Stay strong my man, you’re not alone I swear
I've had well over a decade of mental health problems stemming from childhood trauma. Last autumn I set up a men's mental health peer support group in my local town, and it's going well. I set it up to help others - which it is doing - but it's helping me too. And it was pretty straightforward to get up and running.
Thank you for making this film. It is truly comforting to know that I'm not the only one who deals with this anxiety and suicidal ideation on a daily basis.
It’s so common, but so uncommonly spoke about - it can feel incredibly isolating. You are absolutely not alone. Thank you for your comment and bravery.
Mental health creeps up on you and it feels suffocating. Its worse when mental health causes physical symptoms.
Thanks 🙏
I just want to comment so the algorithm will promote this. MEN ARE PEOPLE TOO!
I needed this right now. As a man that isolates and withdraws, I feel completely alone most of the time. Even if I'm not alone on the occasions when I do socialize and crawl out of my hole, I'm never really there. I can't trust anyone to actually listen and understand me. At best, I get home and feel relieved that no one actually 'saw' me, because i hid it well enough. Being real with people is the worst; the common passive comments of people are usually so destructive. And being told to "man up" is the most destructive of them all. Do you really want men to take their hurt and channel it into more aggressive, toxic, and violent behaviour? Because that's how you destroy a man's empathy and turn him into a savage. The allure of the abandon is intoxicating to think of; to actually feel power instead of absolute powerlessness.
"He who make's a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man." I've always felt like this quote is a perfect example of this duality. We ARE beasts, yet we are a civiliation that seems to put high emphasis on ignoring our animalistic nature and favoring empathy instead. Survival of the fittest IS the ultimate law of nature and as a civilization we seem to strive to go completely against that. Thou shall not kill, thou shall not steal, thou shall not covet thy neighbours wife, and the billion other civil LAWS we have accepted as a civilization for the greater good; they all go against the laws of nature. We are led to believe you don't need to be the strongest to be a successful man, you don't need to be the smartest to be a successful man, you just have to follow the rules. A male lion does not feel guilty for killing the wildebeast, it does not feel guilty for fighting another male for the chance to mate with the pride's females, it does not feel guilty for mercilesslessly killing the infant males of the pride so instead his coming offspring will flourish. No, he feels powerful and master of his destiny, successful in life. So how, if we are so civilized, do i see the most successful people being the ones that ignore civil law and just TAKE what they want from people. Our whole civilization seems like a scam to favor the beasts, while fooling the empaths into being taken advantage of. So if THAT really is how our society works, survival of the fittest, the physically strongest and smartest people get to feel powerful and successful by depressing other peoples success. Power corrupts people. And we constantly see people in positions of power selfishly taking full advantage of it. This is the truth.
So despite being physically fit and smarter than the average person, my empathy has lead to me to being an unsuccessful man. I COULD be a powerful man. At the most extreme I could kill those that threaten me, take the stuff and things I want to improve my life, rape women who reject me; I could be a perfectly content man in the real world. But instead I chose empathy. I choose to take other peoples feelings seriously because I know all too well about the pain and don't want to perpetuate it. Instead i take my blows and rejection and ridicule for my sensitivities as a man, and i suffer in silence. Every day I choose to be a good compassionate person, and everyday I go to bed hurting and struggling with this question; how much more hurt can i tolerate before I succumb to the sadness, or let the beast out of the cage so i can survive. And i hate myself for even contemplating it.
Touching comment, my friend. Stay strong. Mind if I talk about it on my channel sometime? There are some point there that resonate with me.
@@dolorosaenigmakil No I do not mind.
@@danieltwomey7882 I will do that in a couple of videos then. Stay well, my friend.
I will tell you that you ARE all alone, it isn't merely a feeling. I will never forget how the people were to me when I reached out. At the end of the day your seen as a resource, nothing more
Compassion goes both ways mate. Being compassionate doesn't mean turning yourself into a punching bag. Sometimes it's an absolute must to set boundaries and be compassionate to yourself as well. Finding balance between those two things is the hard part. Stay strong and remember to treat yourself with kindness too.
I cried listening to this.
Me too. Honestly, can't help myself but wonder everyday, when will it be the last? :'(
8:30 hit me the hardest.. because when I have been at my lowest, the thoughts of how much of a burden I am on everyone else feels so true.. that I’m only doing bad for my family and friends when I don’t intend to, I’m just marked, broken, cursed, unfixable, unlovable. The only things that kept me from going beyond that were my 2 year old son who may grow up in a crazy, dangerous world without his father to protect him and guide him, and also all of the other men in this world who suffer in silence along with me, who awkwardly laugh and shrug off our deepest shame and pain in front of everyone, but in moments of silence our innermost thoughts we don’t let anyone know about bring so much hurt, pain and suffering that the mere thought of an escape from that pain, as horrible as it sounds and is, is almost strangely comforting, and that is the trap that our people fall into. I need to stay alive so that I can spread the kindness I’m able to share with the world in the smallest ways every single day, so that I can hope that my small gestures will help someone else, stranger or friend, from allowing themselves to fall into that inescapable, irreversible trap that our own mind lies to us about to comfort us.
More people need to see this video.. because it most accurately depicts and provides a small glimpse into the intense suffering I feel inside, and that all of my brothers on this world feel inside, that goes unnoticed.
The worst thing is when you have issues with your friends. You can’t really talk to them because you know they still hang out with people who were mean to you. Or they’re too busy within their own lives to bother to schedule a real hang out or anything. And any group hangout involves people you can’t stand. Trying to find a friend as an adult these days in person is like finding a needle in a haystack...
I've tried suicide several times in the past. Failed each time because of fear. I still think and hope I one day get the courage to follow through. I have chronic recurring depression and anxiety. Anyway, my mind hopes and wish that my family or friends will not get burdened or feel grief if I die. Why is that? Would I think like that if I was a woman?
One time I called emergency because of my mental state. An ambulance came with the most amazing personell ever. When driving me to the hospital I apologized for wasting their time. The medic I was talking to said: You should not apologize, talking to you was the best experience we've had tonight. Yet I felt and feel guilty
I do not want to burden anyone. Is this man thing?
I think many of us have seen/heard "women and children first" (You have probably also seen Titanic). But why am I less worth as an adult male than when I was a boy? I'm still the same person inside and I still remember being a boy. When did my value diminish?
You still fighting?
Being Jewish, I will answer your question with another question which I also want to confront my family with : Assumed we all had cancer of some sorts, would we be willing to spend 50,000$ on treatments ? Why not then on our mental health ?
"Well it looks like collectively breaking the spirit of man may have worked too well, let's pretend to give a shit now that we've about thrown the last shovel full on their casket."
I am 66 . I have felt disconnected over half that time.
Everything said here i agree with and have experienced those feelings myself .
I still feel that way at times.
Now i meditate , i see a counsellor , i exercise , i read and try and accept this mindset and i float around that feeling like mist over a stone .
There is always a long way to go but there is joy sometimes .
Thank you for this.
I’m so pleased this has resonated with you. 😊
Tool rule (but the latest album was not very good) ^_^
Stay well, my friend!
@@JonnyWhite can talk with you
Honestly man, more people need to talk about men's health.
As of posting this comment, I'm 16 years old, I have symptoms of depression, sociopathy, suicidal thoughts, and social anxiety to the point I can't even look at random people whenever I go outside.
I'm also a victim of emotional abuse, mental abuse, physical abuse, racial discrimination, and bullying. I have older two sisters who you can classify as "feminists" and parents who aren't supportive, don't understand the concept of mental health, and have preferential treatment towards my sisters. It's true when they say that men are no longer unconditionally love once they are no longer infants or toddlers. (I think you guys can imagine a bit of what I've gone through).
All of it started when I was 3 and it's still ongoing until now, honestly at first I wanted to make this comment how I've turned out like this, and all their wrongdoings, but that'll be too long and I can write a book with that amount.
In the last 9 years, I've used videogames as my distraction and relief, and I've started to play gacha games (don't worry I haven't spent anything nor do I plan to) because they present me a reality that I long for, a person who's loved, desired, and encouraged by those around him.
I always cry by myself, telling no one about anything, putting on a facade around my "family," I've felt so hollow for so long, sometimes I even laugh because of shit my life is, and even cry while holding a knife in my hand, while contemplating whether or not to do it.
and online school is still a thing here, and it's forecasted to go for at least 1 or 2 more years, if you're a parent and you're still miraculously reading this comment. There are things that your children especially young boys, won't open up to you about unless you give them an environment and give them the encouragement that it's okay to be vulnerable and to feel down at times. As for the feminist, don't keep generalizing men because of a small minority of shit men, and stop jumping onto bandwagons before using your brain first to formulate your own opinion.
You're incredibly eloquent my brother.
Sometimes our background and upbringing and social circumstance just conspires against us. But it is possible to find some kind of way through.
God is with u
@johnottway8074 Thanks man, seeing this pop up in my notifications really takes me back. The last part of my comment makes me cringe haha.
Nowadays, I like to think to I'm in a better place now. Made some genuine friends, learning Japanese, focus more into my love of music, and got better at singing.
My relationship with my family is okay, but they know I'm not exactly happy with them. I've accepted that I am who I am because of my experiences and scars that I bare, and that's okay.
For now though I'll see if music takes off while I'm in college but if not I'm pretty alright with my career path. I plan to move into Japan within a decade and settle down there. I still have a plan for my pursuit of happiness even if music doesn't work out for me.
And if there's someone out there struggling out there, fight with every fiber of your being, claw your way through if you have to. Remember, it's not over till you've reached the end.
This is a bit too close to home for me mate.
Can honestly say pretty much resonate with all those voices.
Very well put together piece of art for us broken men.
So bravo for giving a platform for men to speak.
I had an epiphany the other day,
When you hear and see podcasts where people talk for hours at a time.
I’m not sure the last time I had a conversation that lasted for more than 20-30mins max.
I’m a loner, virtually no close friends most have drifted away, I have learning difficulties, close classmate died by suicide when we were 12yrs old, have social anxiety from being bullied, I have suicidal thoughts, had an volatile absent father & a dismissive avoidant step father who would quite happily without talking to me, unless I spoke to him for something mundane, always felt like it was a chore and I got that feeling from him like it was an irritation for me needing anything from him.
He was & is always busy doing something. Never shown any interest in me, to teach me anything & never had an encouraging word from either of them.
Lost boy kinda feeling still trying to work though what being a man is.
but I know you have to generate your own self worth otherwise those things take control.
Constant negative spiralling thoughts. It’s a daily battle.
Two years after this video is posted and it still hasn't hit 100K views. That's such a shame and that number needs to be higher. Thank you for making this documentary.
Years later I hope others view this and listen. It is just as important now than ever.
its all about women this days, no one cares and even if you search about men mental health in youtube, you would understand from video's views that no one even CARES.
Feminazis destroyed everything
This vid is an exact accurate description of what goes on in my head. I liked the images.
Thanks Alejandro. I’m glad the film has resonated with you in some way. Just know that you’re not alone.
Im a 25yearold. I always question my self worth. Questions that i will never get from anyone, i have to get my own answer. A journey where i love being alone. Im not lonely, i just need someone who cares, love, and comfort. Being a man is at stake. Nobody cares, nobody is concern enough. The answer is out there gentleman. Keep moving forward. Keep yourself occupied.
I suffered a mental breakdown due to a relationship break-up, while still in a high profile computing career... the pressure (internal) to continue looking and behaving as 'normal' led to other emotional cracks and swings of outburst...
Looking back all those years and with a lot of deeper research, in those times, while not being able to explain (to oneself nor others) 'what's going on inside you', I had to work hard to just 'get away' or keep others away from me, in case my outburst (as oft did) got taken as direct anger at that person.. .. like I would infect them with what was going on inside me, so keeping away was best.....
And the other half of you wants to make things OK for them while the claustrophobic like urge to yell and thrash about still eats at the other half of you....
When you can understand at least 'what needs to happen' in a moment, rather than understand or fix 'the problem' at least you can interrupt tthe process, which additionally of course can become habitual, behaviourally and neurologically.
Happy to connect with anyone also struggling here, from my insights over 30+ years and coming out the other side, without institutionalisation nor medication....
Thank you, Mr White, I really needed this video. My high school brothers betrayed me, left with no friends, got rejected from university, tried it again, got it but had to wait over 2 years because of quarantine. Over 2 years of procastination and dream catching eroded my mind and my OCD and ADHD got worse. Got depressed in and out for over a year, non stop for 4 months, withdraw for society, spaced out from my girl to protect her because I was shutting off. She got tired of me being in my hole and the toxicity that came with it, broke up. After 3 years of putting her before anything else, including my mental health (Protected her and consoled her 60 seconds after getting out of the bathroom trying to recover form the worst mental colapse I've had -cryed until didn't have more tears, felt like a spectator in my own head-) and still, after all the love, after all the dedication, after all the bumps and shit we had gone thru, mutually thinking that after every dark time together our relationship got even stronger, because it did, she didn't want to try it again, didn't want me anymore. Begged her to just give the chance to make her fall in love with me again, from scratch, she denied. Just friends if I promised to not make drama if she dated anyone. I'm gonna focuse on me, on my goals, on my physique, strengthening my mind, conquering my head. I'm gonna grind my way up. You can do it brothers, we will all make it, reject modernity, reject simping, embrace yourself, improve yourself. One day at a time
We live in a period where mental health is still seen as a dogma, something that cannot be talked about and should not be talked about. Where man is seen as an indestructible thing capable of enduring whatever happens. Videos like this should be seen all over the world.
Sincere congratulations.
The only way I could describe the feeling of watching this video and hearing all these guys talk about their experiences was how unknowingly I felt like it's happened to me for so many years, how i've suppressed these feelings because nobody cared or rather the feeling of nobody caring. About loneliness, the constant anxiety and stress about having terrible thoughts I never dared to act on because I knew it would hurt those I love more than it would me.
It was a pleasant feeling, a sense of belonging for the first time in a long time and I hope more men will see this and feel the same way I did.
Wow...I have no words to describe how good this video is.
As a guy, when in some moments I knew what some guys are saying..and almost started crying
As challenging as it may be, one can find satisfaction in life.
Build yourself into a man of character and strength, a man of his word and master some useful skills that you can put in the service of others and you will have a fulfilling life.
If you are interested in topics related to manhood and masculinity, feel free to challenge yourself with some ideas on the Mastery Order Channel and, of course, challenge back if you have other points of view.
Looking forward to your opinions.
All the best to you!
The simple fact that this is 10 fucking minutes says enough.
Sometimes a 10 minute conversation can mean the world to someone.
The amount of times that's has helped people surly isn't low, I appreciate the effort I just am also pissed at the injustice men face. Fuck stigma. Thanks fellow.
Nothing in my life has explained how I feel, better than this video has.
I am my own worst enemy.
But I'm a great listener and an even better friend.
I'll be here for you. Any of you.
Because life is worth living.
so glad these men had the courage to speak, something many of us struggle with. thank you.
Reach out to someone? Why? Everyone I know has many other people to hang out or simply contact online and every single person of them is much more interesting, every single one is much more worthy a conversation and pleasant to be around than I am. And most of times I actually reach out I know I am bothering them, they will not say that, but I know I am so I limit contact to necessary or completely cut off and fade away
I feel every single word you wrote. That makes you way more interesting than all those shallow, forcefully positive people that are blind to the hollowness of their lives.
ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU MATTTERR!!!!
Here I am experiencing all these things rn. To these men, I feel you brother.
I love my father more after watching this
end feminism in India sis, if you really want to help men
a feminist video gets millions of views, and this ? this got just 35k in almost 2 years.... feminism has made most women the same old monsters, as patriarchy once made men, but feminism is doing this as a slow poison....
I am happy though, atleast your husband and son in the future might live a good life....
This deserves more attention and to those of you reading this, Im proud of you for seeing this comment right now. Stay strong
i´m not alone, you´re not alone, we are not alone
I'm sending love and compassion from my heart to everyone...
Thanks for putting this video on can relate to a lot on here , it’s hard because the battle is every day hour by hour
It absolutely is every hour. Even when there’s the good days, it’s always there. Thank you for your comment Simon and all the best with your journey.
I believe TH-cam is the only outlet where atleast men acknowledge these issues. Otherwise out in world men aren't allowed to have issues.
Fight, fight like hell to make out voices heard! We are told from a young age to just ‘man up’ and even in a supposed woke world are struggles are still swept under the rug. Reach out to your fellow brothers and make sure hey are doing ok. If not us than who? Hope of you are reading this you are doing good and if not seriously reach out. You are not alone in this fight!! I promise you that.
I feel like crying after watching this and can't understand why.
Great documentary!! So very important to try and understand struggles and how the public is stuck in the 20's. I lost my brother 4 years ago, he took his life, and wow...the hurt, anger, sadness, and just devastation it leaves behind. Its ok to not be ok!! Thanks
I'm sure you will see him in heaven.
Man, you deserve much more views on this video. Keep up the good work and take care! 👍
I dont think depression ever leaves you. You can manage it and resist it but there's no long term cure. But there is hope and you can have lots of good days in between the bad ones. The key is to stay hopeful and keep fighting it.
every time ive ever opened up to anyone it has always backfired, I used to trust really easily and when i got extremely depressed because i was being constantly threatened to be bashed by a group of 19-20 year olds while I'm in highschool, i was extremely self conciouse about my weight, also i was being mentally abused at home and none of my friends ever tried to help but instead just made fun of me for it. Once i decided to open up to my best mate out of all of them, he's trusted me with plenty of secrets that i still have not shared so i decided to trust him enough with my depression and mental state, i even cried in front of him, and he was nice at the time but as soon as he got home he told everyone and then i got constant messages making fun of me, calling me a cry baby, telling me that no one gives a fuck because everyone has a sob story! This has happened 5 times now and its from different "friends" and even girls that i was interested in. After the 5th time i stopped even talking to people for a long while, i fell into the worst depression of my life and got very close to suicide many times but never did it because i didn't want to burden my family of that horror. I was constantly in this state of mind for months, never spoke to anyone but without realising it i became a hollow shell of my oldself and couldn't even recognise myself in the mirror anymore! It wasn't until one day, i was lying in bed and when i looked down i saw my massive stomach hanging out, i was disgusted, angry, confused on why i cant be happy and why no one cares about me! Right then is when i figured out that if i didn't do anything i would end up dead soon so i remembered what it felt like when i used to workout and then my brain clicked into place, "if i cant control how people think of me or what others do then i might as well not care for anyone but myself" i then started to workout everyday, eat super clean and got my act right, ive now had plenty of extremely attractive women flirt with me and the fact that i dont feel like i need them anymore is CRAZY! i used to dream for just one girl to like me back and now i have some of the hottest chicks ive seen flirting with me and instead of trying to get with them, i think first and see if they are even a good match. No one has been for me yet so ive backed off and rejected them, nothing wrong with ignoring the world to get yourself better! STAY STRONG KING!!!
Women have social circles where we can openly talk about our feelings without judgement. I encourage my male friends to not only be open with me but to be open with their male friends. Some of my guy friends will say "uuuj guys don't do that" and I wish there was more i could do to stop that mentality.
Also the mental health system to reach out and get help is incredibly difficult.
Bless, this is something we need to be bringing attention to.
Why has this video not gone viral yet
Thank you so much!
Thanks for your comment, Eunice.
You deserve more views and thankyou for sharing that how hard it has been for some mens to survive in their own head
I'm here to share mine
I suffer from anxiety and depression and I have a thing to constantly please people which is why I suffer a lot, I'm not the kinda person who would avoid you cause you're mean or stupid, I'll always be there for you when you're at a low point in your life cause I know how it feels when no one's around when you're at your worst, sometimes I feel empty inside and suddenly I get the urge to cry out loud, these things always keep me on edge that's when my anxiety kicks in..... My depression is the only that's with me from the beginning, from an young age I got no love from family nor I have the social ability to make friends, which is why I constantly fight with myself to please people for their attention, but the one thing I like about myself is when I get knocked out or at my worst I don't get any suicidal thoughts (Tbh yeah sometimes I do get those thoughts) but the thing is I always look at my problems and say "Try me" cause my mentality is if it hurts you, you should kill it, so people mock me or knock me down but I get back up and fight for success
I'm here before this blows up or gets recommended by the youtube algorithm.
Well done, great title, good usage of the footage and narration.
hugs to every man who's out there whether you have a similar or a smaller problem.
You are not alone
It won’t, it’s talking positively about men, the algorithm won’t like it
Informative! Very well done. I really like the imagery selected for the commentary!
Your kind words mean a lot 😊
@@JonnyWhite Absolutely my friend...as a fellow Filmmaker, I admire your work a lot and aspire to becoming my own cinematographer. I'm going to try it out in the next couple of months and see how I feel.
This is a powerful video. I can relate to much of this, unfortunately. Well done to everyone involved in it and speaking on it. Thanks for this.
As someone who struggles with both depression as well as other disabilities this really does express how myself and so many others feel thank you for making this film.
Women depression is one thing, but depressed men is another thing. Women suffering by thing that relatively known instead they sometimes has no another option. Bun men, there is soo much thing that can make one prone, yet lot of them still unknown.
Like once man said "women and children can be careless, but not men"
Dont know dude . People have different reasons for depression so it depends on the situation i believe not if you a woman or man.
I can relate to 3:54 I'm only 16 and I've never been diagnosed with anything, but this video is great
Thank You for sharing this Video, this is something everyone should be vocal about. Now it's high time.
I finally feel understood
This is so touching.men and boys needs to be talked about more. The expected emotional strength demanded can be overwhelming.
"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
I’m only just now seeing this, thank you for making this
If you like challenging ideas and if mastery and masculinity are also subjects that interest you, I invite you to explore the videos shared on the Mastery Order Channel to challenge yourself with some ideas about manhood and to become the kind of man you would admire and look up to.
We can only better ourselves together, as men among men, so I invite you to use what I share and, of course, share your own opinions so that others can benefit from them as well.
Looking forward to your points of view.
All the best to you!
Thank u a million times
Knowing you are not alone is exceedingly unhelpful.
Very well done. Powerful and sublime.I've certainly had my own history of mental health and addiction issues. I'm in a much better place today and have been since 2019. A lot of it came down to discovering mindfulness meditation, as well as walking in groups. Having a regular sleep schedule (even when out of work). Tying to eat even just a bit more healthier. Watching/listening/reading lots of informative and entertaining content, like this video as just one of many examples. Stay strong, my fellow men. The world needs us
this was a touching documentary, there's a lot of content here I can relate to. Thank you for spreading awareness on this issue. Can you please do a documentary on male victims of psychological abuse and sexual abuse?
This needs... more views.
Please... help us. We (men) have voices too.
We (men), we (teen men), we (children men), have feelings too.
bless you for getting this out there.. The world needs more people like you..We are never alone.. however we think.. perhaps the greatest healing is when we turn the ME around to WE...?
Mercy
Thank you.
I hope this film resonated with you in some way. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
Damn bro 😢 we are not alone in this fight! Don’t give up!
thanks for making this documentry , i appreciate and respect your work.
beautiful cinematography and color grading!
For every men and boy, or literally for everyone who's struggling, i hear you, i feel you, i know how it feels. Please try and see the light
agreed
Thank you for this. ❤️
Beautiful shots, beautiful message, beautiful work, thank you for making this
Smash the like button. Great video. As a person with mental anxiety issues, female I help my male partner get through his rough days the best I can. I cannot stress enough that I have been so tired trying to convince him to get help but he will not go. I can only wish now that making my life enough he will see that he is important and find the self love to go to therapy or to get a diagnosis. Denial is wonderful but for the partner it is like watching someone die a little each day. The pain for both is real. Men need to keep openly talking and sharing so they have support in their communities. Self loving your self love is so important. You just never know what impact you could have on another's life. Gratitude for the video. ❤❤
Great work man
I’m sure no one will read this, but the best way I could describe depression is picture a pool party on a beautiful summers day, everyone is laughing and there’s music playing and everyone is just having a good time, with family, friends, wife or husband, but while the party is goin on you are the only one in the pool, and you are in the deep end with anchors tied around your ankles, you scream you fight to swim up but you just can’t, the party (life) is going on without you, not even a couple feet away, but you are stuck, suffocating while everyone else is enjoying the party, enjoying each other’s company….:no able to hear your underwater screams, and even if they couple it’s not their problem, they have their own life to live at the party, they gotta watch their kids, or have a few drinks, or dance to the music, or try to get laid hitting on one of the girls in their bikinis……you are so close, life is right in front of you, yet you are drowning alone
I´m surprised it doesn´t have more views. To make short document with a deep message must be hard.
Worked at an international bank, singed myself off with stress and the boss seemed surprised. He asked me why I didn't come to him about it first. Dude, YOU were the fucking reason I'm off stressed!!!
Amazing and emotional film, really well done man.
Thanks Paul, that means a lot. Appreciate you taking the time to comment.
@@JonnyWhite my pleasure man, you did a truly outstanding job. Thank you!
Wait, why does this video not have more views, this should be in EVERYONES recomended! We NEED to talk more about mens mental health. I personally have been on the rock bottom for years (This year have been a good year for me) my mother passed away when i was 16 years old, and she was really the only one that i felt comfortable opening up too, she was the one that told me "I love you" I love my father and my father loves me but he was raised in the classic: Don't cry infront of ppl, man up way. He is showing me love in his own way, and thats kinda enough i guess. I got completely numb after my mom died, so i turned myself to video games and alcohol... for years. And during those years more family members passed, and i felt more and more numb/empty and lost. I lost my social skills, still have a hard time keeping eye contact, but its getting better. Im 22 years old today, i got my first job this year. I am currently working out, really trying to better myself. I feel more energized, i don't know how to spell it. Maybe soon in the future i might try out dating, as i never have had an relationship, never have had sex either, but I guess thats normal when you have been inprisoned in your own room for years. I will get better, and im gonna let it take the time it needs. And i believe that if you feel down, speaking to a loved one, a family memeber or a friend that it will help, or i guess i know that it helps. Keep your head up king, its okey to cry, its okey to feel down, it will get better.
My excuses if there are some misspelling, I am Swedish so English is not my motherlanguage.
❤❤
🧡
Thanks for this video, I was bullied when i was school
I relate to this a lot
6:03 so true
Ive been there
Thanks for the comment Ryan, it can be so isolating and scary, making it difficult to ‘live in the moment’ when there’s a sense of almost existential dread. I wish you all the best in your journey.
3 time deployment vet here. For me the hardest part was returning home to no one. No family. No friends. Then at work no one asking how I was feeling. If I was all right, or if I was okay. I began to hurt more when I was at home then when I was deployed. The worst was the holidays. You get numb to the pain after awhile. It becomes everyday, or normal. Then one day something happens, and you realize that it should hurt, but it doesn't. Then you realize you have been in pain for months. Or years. And no one cares, and no one ever did. Even those closest to you. Where to go from here? I don't know. But I wish I did.
Truer words have never been spoken.
For me the constant barrage of negative narrative about men led me to Great Depression. If this was a women’s issue there would be programs and funding but as a man there is nothing other than messages like this that we should talk more. Great message of course but we also need to start acknowledging the male bashing needs to stop and that may go a long way to helping so many
Love it! I just finished up a blog post about Men's Mental Health. I've linked this video to my FB and Twitter. #endthestigma #menhelpingmen
I'm going to have a look! This means so much to me on very personal and universal levels. Hope you're mental health is holding up well? #staystrong
I've not been able to talk for 2 days now cz i was shut down and have no energy and then i saw this, idk if i feel better or worse. I'm just crying.
why its so relatable ?
This is a whole masterpiece
If you like challenging ideas and if mastery and masculinity are also subjects that interest you, I invite you to explore the videos shared on the Mastery Order Channel to challenge yourself with some ideas about manhood and to become the kind of man you would admire and look up to.
We can only better ourselves together, as men among men, so I invite you to use what I share and, of course, share your own opinions so that others can benefit from them as well.
Looking forward to your points of view.
All the best to you!
I always find it interesting and ironic how, in this age of convenience and relative luxury in comparison to our forefathers' plight, people go on record now more than ever discussing how difficult life is. It speaks to man's need to strive and attain via his own will that current societal infrastructure deprives from so many people, but specifically men.
Its crazy how much i can relate to some of these storys it honestly scares me
I felt it once in my life it lasted for 5 months
I wasn't able to breath properly for first week.
My head was like it going to brust.
I found it very surprised when I saw happy people that how they are happy.
Than I wasted 5 precious months of my life.
Now I found myself a different person than what I earlier used to be you know who makes everyone laugh in the group.
Well I took it as one of the life experience that will help me in future.