With the designer dress and the step daughter, I don't think it can even be identified down to "OP isn't ready to be a step mom." She's not ready to be a partner. You don't throw out designer items without consulting your partner when you didn't buy it. You don't treat someone important to your partner like that. OP isn't ready for a relationship period. This much jealousy and this little empathy cannot combine in a productive partner whether there are kids or not.
The marriage bet story: why are they giving grace to the FIL? Just because he bet in favor of the couple doesn’t absolve him of the fact he DID participate in the bet!! Plus he had to get liquored up to confess?
That’s sad. I always feel bad for people that feel like they aren’t accepted in families. My first relationship that was serious / 6 years I didn’t experience it. Now I’m in my second serious relationship and about to be 5 years and my bfs family introduce me as sister n law and my bf introduces me to the kids as auntie (this one is recent) Never experienced this. Never wanna. And I hate knowing some people do. Especially with man who don’t do anything about it.
Story 5 (the glow-up): What I am getting from this story is that she is entering her 304 phase. She's going to cheat on him. He knows it. She knows it. She's going to do it anyway. She "wasted" her 20's having kids and now she wants her 304 phase. Poor dude thought he had a winner, but now he's is almost certainly stuck with a cheater. Just look at the statistics on these things. I'll be waiting for the update of her cheating on him.
Hoping that this wasn't a fake post. OP deleted the account(potential bad sign), but I did find a few comments. From those comments, it wasn't a legal Trust, just a moral barrier OP put up for herself to not use the money solely for her own benefit. According to OP 10% was hers and during her alcoholism some of the money was used possibly including some from her son's 90%, throughout the years of raising 2 children additional money from the 90% was used, and it was once he became 18 that she gave full control over to Adam. With that information(if all is true and the story is real), OP's sister was definitely sour about not receiving aid from OP while OP was using some of that money to keep herself afloat. I wonder if OP properly communicated everything to Ben including what she stated about him being the reason she brought her life back on track. It's honestly possible that there was disparity in how the two boys were raised in terms of money spent on them that OP didn't reveal or even understand enough to acknowledge. Once again another case of not enough information to give OP a solution despite her sister definitely being Asscon-1. I'm hope OP didn't have to delete the account from harassment( their are always ugly people that do it).
GLOW UP: I think you might not truly love your wife. You love what she does FOR You. If you love someone, you love everything about them. When they are feeling successful in whatever they are doing makes you feel successful. You are attracted to THEM in a whole. It's one thing if she becomes a different person as far as full personality shift. Starts treating everyone shitty and beneath them. They stop doing their part in the relationship etc. There are typically other things going on here. Yet, she seems to honestly be finding herself. In relationships, you should be able to grow together. Side by side. My advice to OP is, if you support her in this part of the journey and not let fear lead you. Forgive me for being straight up, you could probably have the BEST S-× of your life right now!! Bringing you both even closer. Stomping out ANY insecurities and being attracted to her for who she was, is and will be!! Also, giving you pride when others compliment your partner rather than a shadow you walk in. Don't stomp out the light that has just begun to shine, add yours and shine brighter!
SPECIAL DRESS: I think there needs to be a little more context. What was done and how iss still not okay. Yet, is there a reason why there is such a separation? I have seen sooo many blended families that are not allowed to properly blend. Where the bio parents express over and over that it's THEIR child, bonus parents are NOT at all the child's parent, etc. This does not create a healthy and balanced environment Each Household has parents. Major decisions are made between the bio parents with discussions with their respective spouses. Each Household can manage their own day to day with the child, as needed, as their own half. With mutual respect of bio & bonus parents. Creating space for that child(ren) to have more love, support, respect and stability. Bonus parents should be treated as another, equally important part of the dynamic not a 3rd wheel (on call nanny). The children are only taught that they only have to listen to certain adults, can treat people like shit without recognizing the care those people give or love they Choose to give without giving birth to them, they learn how to manipulate situations, etc. (Not talking about bonus parents that treat bonus children differently or poorly of course) Point being, maybe OP has tried to love this child as her own and accepted her husband's family. Who knows, even the bio mother's family. Only to constantly be chastised that it's HIS parents, She's NOT YOUR daughter, YOU'RE NOT her parent, etc. Then, the child has seen this and treated her the same way. Given that the issue here is not with the dress at all. The issue is not being ALLOWED to care. Not saying the way it was handled is ok. I'm saying to look at what made it get to that point? Is this what's really going on? Can that be fixed or did you do it to start a means to an end?
Also, sometimes this doesn't start until after they are married. I've seen where the ex feels "threatened" or "replaced" once their ex seriously moves on. Using the child(ren) as a piece in their chess game to keep the ex in a certain position. Creating a difficult and unhealthy situation for all involved. It isn't always something that is foreseen or experienced prior to getting married. Making it even more difficult to navigate or leave. As we don't have any dynamic information to go on, it's difficult to truly judge as a horrible human being rather than really shouldn't have done that.
Yeah context doesn’t matter. The fact is, it’s weird AF to put any sort of issues in a family dynamic ON THE CHILD. On the literal 10 year old. It doesn’t matter if family dynamics causes rifts and distancing. OP put that on a child. There is absolutely no justification with projecting issues and insecurities and insisting a child is seducing people with how she dresses. It’s gross.
With the designer dress and the step daughter, I don't think it can even be identified down to "OP isn't ready to be a step mom." She's not ready to be a partner. You don't throw out designer items without consulting your partner when you didn't buy it. You don't treat someone important to your partner like that. OP isn't ready for a relationship period. This much jealousy and this little empathy cannot combine in a productive partner whether there are kids or not.
For bad petty confetti, you should make an animation of poop confetti. 😂
The marriage bet story: why are they giving grace to the FIL? Just because he bet in favor of the couple doesn’t absolve him of the fact he DID participate in the bet!! Plus he had to get liquored up to confess?
Story 1
I think that you missed that he wasn't concerned about the fact the kid was on the screen but more the content the kid was watching.
That’s sad. I always feel bad for people that feel like they aren’t accepted in families. My first relationship that was serious / 6 years I didn’t experience it.
Now I’m in my second serious relationship and about to be 5 years and my bfs family introduce me as sister n law and my bf introduces me to the kids as auntie (this one is recent)
Never experienced this. Never wanna. And I hate knowing some people do.
Especially with man who don’t do anything about it.
Story 5 (the glow-up): What I am getting from this story is that she is entering her 304 phase. She's going to cheat on him. He knows it. She knows it. She's going to do it anyway. She "wasted" her 20's having kids and now she wants her 304 phase. Poor dude thought he had a winner, but now he's is almost certainly stuck with a cheater. Just look at the statistics on these things.
I'll be waiting for the update of her cheating on him.
Hoping that this wasn't a fake post. OP deleted the account(potential bad sign), but I did find a few comments. From those comments, it wasn't a legal Trust, just a moral barrier OP put up for herself to not use the money solely for her own benefit. According to OP 10% was hers and during her alcoholism some of the money was used possibly including some from her son's 90%, throughout the years of raising 2 children additional money from the 90% was used, and it was once he became 18 that she gave full control over to Adam.
With that information(if all is true and the story is real), OP's sister was definitely sour about not receiving aid from OP while OP was using some of that money to keep herself afloat. I wonder if OP properly communicated everything to Ben including what she stated about him being the reason she brought her life back on track. It's honestly possible that there was disparity in how the two boys were raised in terms of money spent on them that OP didn't reveal or even understand enough to acknowledge. Once again another case of not enough information to give OP a solution despite her sister definitely being Asscon-1. I'm hope OP didn't have to delete the account from harassment( their are always ugly people that do it).
I'm not a parent but o.p. is acting like the kid was watching adult videos
🧡💛💚🤍
GLOW UP: I think you might not truly love your wife. You love what she does FOR You. If you love someone, you love everything about them. When they are feeling successful in whatever they are doing makes you feel successful. You are attracted to THEM in a whole.
It's one thing if she becomes a different person as far as full personality shift. Starts treating everyone shitty and beneath them. They stop doing their part in the relationship etc. There are typically other things going on here. Yet, she seems to honestly be finding herself.
In relationships, you should be able to grow together. Side by side. My advice to OP is, if you support her in this part of the journey and not let fear lead you. Forgive me for being straight up, you could probably have the BEST S-× of your life right now!! Bringing you both even closer. Stomping out ANY insecurities and being attracted to her for who she was, is and will be!! Also, giving you pride when others compliment your partner rather than a shadow you walk in.
Don't stomp out the light that has just begun to shine, add yours and shine brighter!
SPECIAL DRESS: I think there needs to be a little more context. What was done and how iss still not okay. Yet, is there a reason why there is such a separation? I have seen sooo many blended families that are not allowed to properly blend. Where the bio parents express over and over that it's THEIR child, bonus parents are NOT at all the child's parent, etc. This does not create a healthy and balanced environment Each Household has parents. Major decisions are made between the bio parents with discussions with their respective spouses. Each Household can manage their own day to day with the child, as needed, as their own half. With mutual respect of bio & bonus parents. Creating space for that child(ren) to have more love, support, respect and stability. Bonus parents should be treated as another, equally important part of the dynamic not a 3rd wheel (on call nanny).
The children are only taught that they only have to listen to certain adults, can treat people like shit without recognizing the care those people give or love they Choose to give without giving birth to them, they learn how to manipulate situations, etc. (Not talking about bonus parents that treat bonus children differently or poorly of course)
Point being, maybe OP has tried to love this child as her own and accepted her husband's family. Who knows, even the bio mother's family. Only to constantly be chastised that it's HIS parents, She's NOT YOUR daughter, YOU'RE NOT her parent, etc. Then, the child has seen this and treated her the same way. Given that the issue here is not with the dress at all. The issue is not being ALLOWED to care. Not saying the way it was handled is ok. I'm saying to look at what made it get to that point? Is this what's really going on? Can that be fixed or did you do it to start a means to an end?
Also, sometimes this doesn't start until after they are married. I've seen where the ex feels "threatened" or "replaced" once their ex seriously moves on. Using the child(ren) as a piece in their chess game to keep the ex in a certain position. Creating a difficult and unhealthy situation for all involved.
It isn't always something that is foreseen or experienced prior to getting married. Making it even more difficult to navigate or leave. As we don't have any dynamic information to go on, it's difficult to truly judge as a horrible human being rather than really shouldn't have done that.
Yeah context doesn’t matter. The fact is, it’s weird AF to put any sort of issues in a family dynamic ON THE CHILD. On the literal 10 year old. It doesn’t matter if family dynamics causes rifts and distancing. OP put that on a child. There is absolutely no justification with projecting issues and insecurities and insisting a child is seducing people with how she dresses. It’s gross.