I remember going to this movie with 3 other friends ( 2 girls and 1 guy) mainly because the girls dragged us to go. By the end of the movie me and the other guy were choking on laughter while the girls were all in tears. Honestly, one of the most entertaining movies I've been to, but for all the wrong reasons.
"I think we should see other freakish hell beasts." *Jacob removes his shirt* "Mom, I didn't know YOU wanted to see New Moon!" "Quiet dear, I'm trying to watch."
"I sold you to another franchise, Hogwarts for you kid." That would be too cruel. The Harry Potter series didn't do anything to deserve getting something as horrible as Bella.
so let me get this straight, Bella had to choose between the guy who has a personality, is a shitload closer to her age range, is genuinely considered to be a bit of a beefcake, and genuinely cares about her ......or the guy who once described her as his own personal brand of heroine, has a 1000 year age gap, barely any personality, and a somewhat typical body.....and she chose the second one?
I remember in high school, I had a friend who used to read Twilight fanfiction. When he told me about it, he asked what I thought. I said, "I'm not entirely sure. On one hand, you should be ashamed of yourself for reading it and I should be ashamed for letting you read it. On the other hand, those fanfic writers are probably better authors than Stephanie Myer will ever be. But, for the most part, I'm disappointed that you even consider reading anything based on that pile of garbage." About a week later, he told me he stopped. He now reads Halo fanficton.
So he hopped out of one trashcan and fell in to another? Calmly direct him towards Tiberium Wars(the fanfic novel) and/or 1d4chan where he may discover The All Guardsmen Party.
oh THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!! I've been laughing my arse off for the entire thing and needed a new internet addiction, I think Rifftrax is going to be it :)
Never seen these movies and after watching these rifftrax it's like seeing a girl who you almost slept with but didn't, and then you find out a week later she has all the stds and you thank your guardian angel.
For every person donned a "Team ___" T-shirt, there is someone who has burnt Twilight and videotaped it. For every girl who has built an Edward shrine in there room, there is someone who has laughed uproarously at the commentary by RiffTrax. Maybe that's the merit of Twilight. Everyone loves it. Some love it, some love to make fun of it. Twilight is the worst and best thing to ever happen to cinema. Thank you, Twilight. I will continue to laugh at you for a long time.
Fun fact: These aren't vampires. No, they're something else that they ALSO failed to be good at: they're blood-powered diamond golems. That should be awesomely fabulous, and yet we get emotionless... Well, statues.
I love how over half the riffs in this just involve saying the word "Line?" Seriously, if they cut out all the long pauses in this movie, it would only be about 30 minutes.
jbvader721 Yes, that is what I thought; though I kept wanting to call him Sheeran, which didn't sound right. I am surprised he is in this considering he is probably the biggest name in the franchise besides Dakota Fanning.
MrHypnofan I think Sheen was one of the few actors in the atrocity called "The Twilight Saga" that was in on the fact on how stupid the franchise was and made his acting as hammy as possible.
JackNapierVlog I know that and I don't blame any of them for acting like they wanted to get the hell of the set. I was just pointing out that Michael Sheen was slightly different by hamming up his performance similar to Jeremy Irons in "Dungeons and Dragons" and Eddie Redmayne in "Jupiter Ascending".
"It WAS a little blood until Edward flayed open my brachial artery." 🤣
"Kristen?...Um, Kristen? The camera´s rolling, honey. Act, please!"
Literally all four movies.
And she's like "What is this "acting" you speak of?"
There were five! Even worse!
@@ellatizzy9726 Oh, God, No!!
Honestly it wasn't her fault, it was the lackluster source material.
"She says every line like she's swallowing dry wall". I don't know why but that made me laugh hardest.
He's doing his impression of the millions of boyfriends who had to sit through this movie.
5:55 "Again, Mike was left to wonder why he just doesn't date the friendlier, hotter, Oscar nominated girl."
should've casted Anna Kendrick instead
That line has aged...weirdly.
".....line." Gets me every time.
I remember going to this movie with 3 other friends ( 2 girls and 1 guy) mainly because the girls dragged us to go. By the end of the movie me and the other guy were choking on laughter while the girls were all in tears. Honestly, one of the most entertaining movies I've been to, but for all the wrong reasons.
ее
I like to believe those pauses are there because its actually a comedy and its a time for the audience to laugh
It's the best way to excuse bad writing and lazy direction.
Their reaction to Jacob taking his shirt off always makes me laugh!
For some reason the funniest line for me is "this is no time for interpretive dance."
"My God, I missed McDonald's breakfast!!"
LOL
lol
“My hair extensions missed you”
"I think we should see other freakish hell beasts."
*Jacob removes his shirt*
"Mom, I didn't know YOU wanted to see New Moon!"
"Quiet dear, I'm trying to watch."
"I sold you to another franchise, Hogwarts for you kid."
That would be too cruel. The Harry Potter series didn't do anything to deserve getting something as horrible as Bella.
+TheStapleGunKid Bella makes Voldemort look like a saint in comparison.
The difference between them is Voldemort kills people. Bella drives people to kill themselves with her whining.
so let me get this straight, Bella had to choose between the guy who has a personality, is a shitload closer to her age range, is genuinely considered to be a bit of a beefcake, and genuinely cares about her ......or the guy who once described her as his own personal brand of heroine, has a 1000 year age gap, barely any personality, and a somewhat typical body.....and she chose the second one?
The first one did fall in love with her baby so... Really both choices suck.
🎶Not staying alive 🎶😂😂
I haven't watch this video in years I had to come back for a good laugh
if Twilight ever gets rebooted (fuck it, it's Hollywood *WHEN it gets rebooted) the title should be Twilight: The Quest To Find Where Bella Is Going!
"This is the last time you'll ever see me."
"YES! Drinks all around!"
" what are you guys talkin about....ca....can i talk with you?" loll omg
I love RiffTrax
I regret not buying more shirts!
I regret not buying Bob more shirts!
I remember in high school, I had a friend who used to read Twilight fanfiction. When he told me about it, he asked what I thought. I said, "I'm not entirely sure. On one hand, you should be ashamed of yourself for reading it and I should be ashamed for letting you read it. On the other hand, those fanfic writers are probably better authors than Stephanie Myer will ever be. But, for the most part, I'm disappointed that you even consider reading anything based on that pile of garbage." About a week later, he told me he stopped. He now reads Halo fanficton.
CitizenKahne1992 still a better story than twilight
James Armstrong ah yes that's what i meant :P
+Hunter Hoehn But also a better story.
Hey, there are some Twilight spite-fics that are kind of awesome.
So he hopped out of one trashcan and fell in to another? Calmly direct him towards Tiberium Wars(the fanfic novel) and/or 1d4chan where he may discover The All Guardsmen Party.
4:41 all the shirt jokes 🤣😂🤣 and the predicament 5:42
"They shot Wilhelm!"
9:36 Laughed WAY too hard at that.
And this seriously needs to happen on that show someday.
I'm super late, but you do know that actually happened, right? Dude got fucking shanked.
I introduced my twilight loving friends to this and now ,like me, they hate it and laugh wholeheartedly with this.
oh THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!
I've been laughing my arse off for the entire thing and needed a new internet addiction, I think Rifftrax is going to be it :)
Let's not forget that Twilight fanfic is what inspired 50 Shades of Grey
I don’t even like comedy but this has me GASPING for air
Never seen these movies and after watching these rifftrax it's like seeing a girl who you almost slept with but didn't, and then you find out a week later she has all the stds and you thank your guardian angel.
For every person donned a "Team ___" T-shirt, there is someone who has burnt Twilight and videotaped it. For every girl who has built an Edward shrine in there room, there is someone who has laughed uproarously at the commentary by RiffTrax. Maybe that's the merit of Twilight. Everyone loves it. Some love it, some love to make fun of it. Twilight is the worst and best thing to ever happen to cinema. Thank you, Twilight. I will continue to laugh at you for a long time.
"I have one ...condition" Syphilis XD
Fun fact: These aren't vampires. No, they're something else that they ALSO failed to be good at: they're blood-powered diamond golems.
That should be awesomely fabulous, and yet we get emotionless... Well, statues.
Oh come on, that's just an insult. Everyone knows statues have more personality than these things.
JESUS! THEY ARE OBVIOUSLY FAIRYS
Cerys Hudson How dare you insult fairies! What the fuck did they ever do to you?
+Kay Scruton
I didn't insult them! I luff fairies
All of you are wrong. They're obviously aliens trying to copy human emotions.
"My hair extensions missed you!"
Haaaaaaa!!!
"Glad you're home, I've been hovering in the dark by the door for hours." ahh...gets me everytime.
I feel like if the books/films had focused on literally any other characters than Bella and Edward, they might have been decent.
Gotta listen to the new Jonas
Lovely, just lovely...
You sound like a lovely human being Serpent Seven.
Seriously gonna drown in my coke, every time i go to take a sip thinking its safe NOPE!
"I've sold you to another franchise, it's Hogwarts for you, kid"
Your so vain,you probably think every vampire attack is about you XD lmbo I shouldn't be eating while watching this
the young John Redcorn
slenderman has more facial expressions than bella
I choked on my drink.
5:15..and that's when the entire theater became moist.
Well, it certainly wasn't at 8:39...
Damp*
.......Line?
“My hair extensions missed you”
I have one condition *smirk*
siPHyLis
Smirk 😂
Line?
The 50 points for emo bingo. LOOOOL
Evil Harpo lol!
The guy who played Sam is a real comeback story...he's a recovering drug addict.
I regret being named Embryyyyyy!
I love all the potty-training jokes
Not Staying Alive....lmao
3:58 she's not having a nightmare, it's just really bad cramps!
Bill Corbett is a treasure.
That won't be necessary .
"we don't go on any fox reality shows" OMFG, LMAO!
I love how over half the riffs in this just involve saying the word "Line?"
Seriously, if they cut out all the long pauses in this movie, it would only be about 30 minutes.
um, line?
1:44
Indeed. I was dating someone in middle school and she dragged me to this movie. At least it got me to second base.
Was it worth it?
Lmao "you gotta hear the new Jonas"
You're like a Snuggie made of skin xD That was beautiful.
Despite considering the Pacific Northwest isn't hot. I'll take my shirt off.
"I'm not touching you" almost made me shit myself.
Am I the only one who hears "All she wants to do is, all she wants to do is dance..." when Edward walks on for the first time?
They are looking very cute together always
"things are m-made of atoms" lol
This movies saving Grace was its soundtrack
It's ten words actually. "Because it doesn't make sense, for you to love me."
+Freemind They probably aren't counting "Because"
ITS A MUMMIFIED DONUT! I'M WETTINGY FUCKIN PANTS
"There's a crappy band in a helicopter following her." XD
No kidding all of the music in the twilight films is crappy.
+223Drone Everything related to Twilight is crappy.
+223Drone i don't know, i quite like Muse. lord knows why they chose to let their music be used in twilight though
I don't know, I quite like Radiohead and Muse.
So I have to become a merman or skeleton boy to get ladies, that's what the world has come to, eh?
"I invented 'it's not you!' If anything, it's me!"
"Gooble gobble." Tod Browning's "Freaks" is a masterpiece of suspense compared to THIS!
It made a ding! :D
Wifi kissing. Oh yes
Is the head of the Volturri the guy from Frost/Nixon?
MrHypnofan Tragically, yes. His name is Michael Sheen.
jbvader721 Yes, that is what I thought; though I kept wanting to call him Sheeran, which didn't sound right. I am surprised he is in this considering he is probably the biggest name in the franchise besides Dakota Fanning.
MrHypnofan I think Sheen was one of the few actors in the atrocity called "The Twilight Saga" that was in on the fact on how stupid the franchise was and made his acting as hammy as possible.
see, if the entire cast did the same thing as him, the franchise would've been MUCH more entertaining.
JackNapierVlog I know that and I don't blame any of them for acting like they wanted to get the hell of the set. I was just pointing out that Michael Sheen was slightly different by hamming up his performance similar to Jeremy Irons in "Dungeons and Dragons" and Eddie Redmayne in "Jupiter Ascending".
NEEDS MORE VIEWS AND COMMENTS!!
5:17 just killed me.
George Costanza said it first.
i love the water
You mean me, Lugosi, or Bartok?
I was thinking the same thing.
She's been acting since she was like 2 she can buy and sell us all.
'acting'
Mommy there is a pervert.
Gooble gobble is win.
RIP your monitor
I luv twilight
I died when I heard it.
Freaks ftw!
The PAUSING!!! is infuriating.
Because I agree. And I'm not quoting him. I put his statement in my own words. Besides, not everyone knows who he is. Maybe now more people will.
I disuninwantinate you.
X'D
gooble gobble, gooble gobble?
Renew it cause lee newton made the list and I love sourcefed
A Snuggie made of skin…..eeeeew
2:35 In what way?
fuckin bela bartok joke this is high-brow stuff
evil Harbo!
Why are you just quoting the smeghead?