"Why Does My Husband Say Hurtful Things?" | Paul Friedman
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 เม.ย. 2021
- There are things you could do to get him to change his approach to you a little bit and there's also things that you can do to make it easier for you when he does that. It's not fair for him to do that. Don't get me wrong. It's not okay but we're not taught how to behave in our marriages. Men are not taught and women are not taught so there's a ton of problems in virtually every marriage because we're mistaught. And the people who are supposed to teach us don't know any better. I happen to know because I used to be a divorce mediator switch. And so I studied marriage from a very practical, very pragmatic point of view and I started with the question, why do people get married in the first place? I'm bringing this up because we don't get married in order to say hurtful things and we don't get married so that we could be hurt by things that our spouse tells us. We get married to be happy. We get married to be happier every single day of our married lives and to experience unconditional love, marital love. You're not, clearly, you're not having these experiences. It really boils back down to this. If you want to achieve something, you should have a plan that scientifically, mathematically works to achieve what you want.
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Sincere and determined people also need truthful information and a good plan to escape the cycle and hole you are in. Incredible marriages ARE possible. They are achieved by
1. Learning about the mind and mastering it so your changes are permanent and you are always growing.
2. Learning how to behave, and not behave in marriage friendly ways
3. Making unconditional love and ever-expanding happiness your primary and constant missions.
Go to our website and get the course(s) if you need them. Now is not the time to experiment. It is the time for positive action. themarriagefoundation.org/
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At this moment, I do not even want to be attractive to my husband who says hurtful things to me. My emotions are telling me to try to get the attention of another man who may be nice to me right now and show positive interest. I am trying to get connected to my heart so that I can be different and stronger so his words do not affect me at all; my emotions are telling me that I hate my husband, and to give myself to some other man, at least physically.
When we finally recognize that we need to change and then begin the process of changing we are challenged, as you are now, with temptations. Those are merely signs to the spiritual warrior that we must redouble our effort. Always run from temptation if you cannot beat it at the moment. Become yourself, the soul. Rise above the mind's challenges by going into love.
@@TheMarriageFoundation 🙏🏽Thank You Kind, beautiful Sir.🙏🏽✨❤
Wow I’ve been feeling exactly that! You said it perfectly!! I’m sorry your going through that o still an too
Who hurts you doesn’t Love you. Some husbands can’t communicate or don’t want to. But when we do, they automatically think that everything is an argument. And so they get very verbally aggressive up to a point where they can’t control their temper. And start breaking things. So at the end of the of day it’s them who are putting a lack of character on themselves.
Why is this not addressing his need to change? He is super critical and constantly picking fights with me. I need to change, so I can be respected?
This question is deeper than you think. Most people know that self-change is very difficult (why my discovery of the SEW technique is included in the courses) and getting someone else to change is like asking the impossible. So, striving for self-change, which is what we guide those who are ready for it to do, are guided in a way that they experience self happiness and individual growth. That is what inspires the other to become much more easy to be with and even change themselves.
I actually appreciate this advice. It’s so different than the misogynistic advice women get in marriages. It’s so universal and can be applied to in anything and anyone in life. Don’t take it personal, don’t bother. If anyone tries to hurt you with their words, it’s really best to go away and focus on yourself. Cultivate that ever changing self-love. That’s it
Not quite, but close. The idea is to be above the fray so you the soul are not affected while you the soul give love
Yes, that type of husband who says bad things , definitely hates you, you quoted the exact feeling why he is doing it.
And you are right.
1. The best way to make him change is zero reaction.
2. Working on yourself .
Be the best form and the right one whether it is him or someone else will enjoy your company .
Am from apologising to my husband now.this video has taught me alot .I have been wrong all along.thanks for this video
So true. 😢😢😢 This is bringing me to tears
That happens and we should now get the course for women and learn how to achieve joy and love in marriage.
I really like your advice it really helps me to start changing myself and and it gives me some positive feedback on what to do. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you Paul. I wish I had seen your videos before I got married. But it's not too late either. I am working on it by watching your videos. Thanks from India. 🙏
Wonderful! You will do better by learning.
Sir, this is GREATNESS thanks 🙏🏿!!!
Thank you for your help.
Thank you great advice!
He started to do like that. I feel broken 💔 deep inside
Better to not succumb to emotions but to now change your marriage by practical efforts. Keep watching the videos.
What if the man is just saying hurtful things and wife is doing all she can?
Our way is about lifting ourselves above the emotional sensitivities and into a space of love. Even though we fully expect our soulmate to treat us with love not many of us have received the training so mostly live for themselves. You be differrnt. Love your husband even when he is mistreating you and do it from the heart, the soul, so it is real and deep.
@@TheMarriageFoundation do you offer online support we could sure use some tips. Thank you for the kind reply.
We have "ask a counselor" which is free and we have courses which are incredible 🙏 not that our counselors aren't incredible, too😀
🎉Thank you. I will check The free marriage foundation. And empower women course. I like to know the price of it. Thank you from Zanzibar.
Subscribing