Now, now, some lawyer is going to get stuck with defending the guy. I think lawyers are supposed to defend their clients to the best of their ability. I think defense lawyers can be disbarred for intentionally throwing a case. It would be hard to prove, but I think it is written somewhere. Besides, at that point, lawyers could be bribed to throw without consequences. Corporations would love that. "Our newest executives are always the ones embezzling and failing to report safety hazards. Strange coincidence."
at a minimum once he was caught drinking afterwards it should have been the full 20 year sentence. He never should have gotten off to start, but most definitely not afterwards (2 years is nothing).
So I’ve actually met some of the Deputies who investigated Ethan Couche’s crash and they were still pissed, understandably. They also said “allegedly” the judge retired very soon after a very wealthy man
That actually makes a lot of sense. The most corrupt judges live in Louisiana and Texas. (As someone from Arkansas who has driven through those states many times and has plenty of family who has -- allegedly -- greased a palm of a corrupt policeman just to avoid having to stand before an even more corrupt judge, whose palm demands even more greasing.)
19:06 - Plot twist: The theme song for the show "Baretta", which made Robert Blake a more-or-less household name in the U.S. in the 70s, had a theme song called "Keep Your Eye On the Sparrow," which was sung by Sammy Davis, Jr., and had this as its second rhyming couplet: "Don't do the crime/ If you can't do the time." *Irony!* The song was written by famous keyboard composer/performer Dave Grusin (music) and musical artist Morgan Ames (lyrics). In the liner notes to the Sheffield LP "Dave Grusin: Discovered Again!", Ames said the first lyrics she came up with were this couplet: "Keep your eye on the sparrow / when the going gets narrow", and she fleshed it out from there. Thank you for attending my TED talk.
Being drunk makes it less severe because the people who write the laws like to drink, and don't like the idea that getting drunk is wrong. The same way most of them don't smoke crack but may snort coke form time to time, leading to possession of an ounce of coke being less serious than a few grams of crack in most US states.
I'm normally the whitest guy in the Room The reason that they are so hard on crack Cocaine is originally it was a drug used by the minorities and the poor And in most cases the people writing the laws are wealthy and white
I remember there was a lady who was driving home one night and she hit a man on the road who died from his injuries. She wasnt charged with anything in that situation because she stopped immediately as she thought she had hit a deer and wanted to check on it but another driver who pulled up behind her told her to stay in the car because it wasnt a deer she had hit but rather a person. Emergency services were called and the woman was taken into the local station for questions. The man she hit was one of small cities regular drunks who could often be found walking home which was in a rural area on the outskirts of the city. If he wasnt stumbling home along the side of the highway he could often be found sleeping in the ditch off the roadside except this time he was stumbling along and decided to sleep on side of the highway mostly in traffic lane. It was one of those pitch black nights with no moon so the poor woman didnt even see him sleeping on the highway. It wasn't until she felt something hit the car and thinking it was a deer she had hit. This is one way a person can hit another and it be a complete accident on their part
" It was one of those pitch black nights with no moon so the poor woman didnt even see him sleeping on the highway." You mean she couldn't be arsed to turn on her lights either?
@@aloeme I hate to be the one to tell you this but even with headlights on you can't always see things. I got lost trying to find my way home to ranch I lived on for over 15 years because it was simply too dark and foggy out. I couldn't tell the difference between the range road I was supposed to drive down to my house and one of those roadside pull over places. I only managed to find my house when I called someone to meet me on the end of the range road I was supposed to be on with their lights that I was finally able to track down the correct road and not end up in a field somewhere along the way. That's just another example of how even with lights on its possible to not be able to see clearly
The one I remember the most is the Twinkie Defense during the trial of Dan White for the murder of Harvey Milk and George Moscone. The defense team used a psychologist to try to prove that he was depressed, and that the combination of depression and eating more junk food than usual (including Twinkies and Coca Cola) led to a state of diminished capacity. His first degree murder charge was changed to voluntary manslaughter because of it, reducing the amount of jail time significantly.
The "affluenza" kid served less prison time for killing four people than his mom did for money laundering. Shame on the judge, attorneys, prosecutors, and jury.
For those who don't know, the Chewbacca Defense is where the attorney attempts to confuse the jury with unrelated facts and irrelevant information in the hopes that they collectively decide that the whole thing is nonsense and throw the case out. This is an actual strategy that sees occasional use, but it's named after an episode of South Park where a lawyer goes on a tangent about Chewbacca and the Ewoks in the middle of a court room. It works in South Park but Legal Eagle says it doesn't work so good in real life, so... don't try it.
I was eating pizza, cheese sticks, and loaded french fries during this entire episode 😂😂😂😂 my mom thought I lost my mind when I spat out a big bite of pizza and started laughing 😅😅😅😅
One thing I always hate about cases like the affluenza one is that focus gets put exclusively on the people who died while ignoring the even greater number of people who suffer life changing disabilities and continue to suffer for decades more as a consequence of his actions.
I strongly agree with Simon's opinions on what the punishment gor drunk driving should be. In this day and age, there is no excuse for driving while drunk. Everyone knows the risks involved, and if you choose to endanger the public at large by drunk driving you should face serious consequences, not just community service.
In most EU countries, you're pretty much toasted if you're found driving over the legal limit. Not only that, but you're guilty from the moment you started your car, and this guilt supersedes most other faults. So, if you're waiting "drunk" on a red traffic light to turn green and another car slams on you from your back, YOU are the one in fault, not the car that slammed you! This would not be the case if you were not drunk, but since you're drunk, you basically have no legal defense against almost all traffic laws. Also insurance does NOT cover you in that case. Perhaps US should borrow some of these laws ?
@@djgeorgetsagkadopoulos I don't know about the insurance one because they don't deserve anymore breaks or reasons to deny coverage to their subscribers. Victims would also be left to flounder if they can't collect from insurance.
I think because young people can make extremely stupid and rashes decisions without fully understanding the consequences of their actions, imo, unless they harm someone, they should get one chance to make better choices without jail time.
@apriljk6557 insurance doesn't work like this here in EU. Insurance will cover a major part of expenses related to damages against third parties, but then (if you are over the legal limit) they will come after you to collect the money (or a part of it anyway) they spent. This ensures that third parties will get what they deserve, and also somehow makes individuals to think twice before driving drunk because if anything happens they will most likely have to pay for it eventually from their own money.
1st time offenders lose a license for 1 year . Spend the night in jail. Have to attend 15 weeks of education. And do community service. If it’s a second offense with a certain time frame of the first the penalty is often mandatory time - maybe an attorney can get this negotiated. If anyone was hurt - this is taken into consideration as well . The penalty is already quite high.
To anyone who isn't aware of what Jerry Springer's show was like, I highly suggest listening to the parody of the song "One Week" called "Jerry Springer" by Weird Al. It's a perfect description.
@@mikeharris5681 he's had a few bangers, imo. People in the 80s were completely uncool and the prevailing humor was goofy and cheesy af. I mean, most of the content on TV wasn't very funny by today's standards, unless it's consumed as a parody of the strangeness of the time when sitcoms were filmed in front of a studio full of people and their reactions were part of the experience of the shows. There was some funny stuff but most of the stuff aired on TV had to appeal to a broad audience, including kids. So I think the mainstream was who WA would try to appeal to and that meant mildly funny, safe, and a broad audience of temporary attention from fans of him and/or the artist he's covering, rather than comedy fans and a lifetime of reverence to them. He chose to make a lot of money.
on Brain Blaze Simon talks about how good the FBI are at their jobs. So how about a Brain Blaze video of Some FBI solved cases that were notable and impressive
As for your question about stealing a case of beer...put it in your shopping cart & walk out. Unless the store has an asset protection person that's "allowed" to put hands on the person, they'll just let them walk out.
Robert Blake got his start in the movie series “The Little Rascals” also known as “Our Gang”, which followed the adventures of a group of children and was made from 1939-1944. There was a modern version created in 2014.
I’ve never understood the affluenza defense in the Couch case - truly wealthy people in America have no clue where a Walmart is and would not have to steal beer, underage or otherwise. His parents just suck.
The gay panic defence has massive roots in transphobia as well. There are far too many of us who've been murdered simply because transphobes figure out or suspect that we're trans. "I thought I was being hit on by a real woman/man but instead THEY'RE TRYNA TRICK ME INTO BEIN' GAY"
I'm bisexual and hate that gay panic has been repeatedly used as a legal defense. Full stop. Want to make it abundantly clear it is not okay and even in the case in the video it is not a valid defense and is just weaponizing fear and hatred of homosexuality and as you point out it extends into transphobia. That said, as a bisexual who wouldn't have a problem with the fact that the friend was the same sex, I absolutely would have a problem with them not only dragging me onto television and effectively either forcing me to accept or reject them in front of countless witnesses against my will, but after rejecting them politely on such a grand scale if that person CAME TO MY HOUSE and continued to leave suggesting notes and hints about wanting to be with me intimately after a clear NO I would feel unsafe. I wouldn't do what this guy did and all out premeditate to end somebody, but I'd probably blast them on social media and firmly say I do not feel safe around them and do not want them at my home again, and if they come to my home after having made me unsafe and me having made such a public warning what happens is on them
Who ever worked on the edits for this video did amazing, I haven't laughed so hard at one of your videos in a while (I'm typically watching the dark ones which are not typically funny)
You can be as weird as you want just don't be disrespectful and the s******* to other people, if you want to be weird among yourself and your friends and who cares man.
1:41 Seems the editor doesn't know what the Chewbacca defense is either, or he'd have put in an appropriate clip from South Park there. The coke can (which sounded like Chewbacca was interesting though!
For Simons benefit you steal a create of beer the same way you buy one... You just skip the going to the till bit and walk or run out with it depending on if security has spotted you or not. Sometimes its so easy to steal when people think you are being so blatant you must be a law abiding citizen. Slash claimed to have shoplifted a full size inflatable rib boat by just lifting it off the wall and walking off with it. He said he didn't need a boat he just liked to challenge himself to take bigger and more impressive things. Think he said he stole his famous hat😂 apparently he had a shoplifting addition
Yep. This restaurant had an electric guitar hanging on a wall as a decoration and some guy just took it off and walked out. Everyone was like: _"How does no one notice a guy stealing a guitar like that?!"_ .. But the truth is no one batted an eye.
Not forgetting the Shaggy Defense as used by R Kelly. "It wasn't me" despite the video tape showing someone really similar looking to you committing those crimes.
A literal LTC in the US Army left his dang pistol on a public bus and it fell between the seat back and the actual seat. A few hours later, he finally remembered where he left it and it was still there (even though many people had ridden that bus). So, it can happen. --- to complete this story, no. He didn't get in trouble because, just like the rich, rank has privilege.
Just say aww thank you! Like Peter Griffin when him & the guys got arrested, then he said "yeah they're gonna be really bummed when they find out I'm not gay" 😂
Not only do normal employees not get paid to stop you, if any of them actually paid any attention to training videos, they aren't supposed to do anything at all to stop you. They can actually be charged if they do.
The gay panic defence is outrageous I've heard it's been used when the perpetrator only found out the victim was gay after. So glad I don't live in the USA
I should imagine this defence has been used successfully by many homophobe. I know murder is murder and none of these people deserved to be killed, but somehow I don't think a defence used by people who committed other kinds of hate crime would be treated as a source of humour. 🙁
the affluenza case always reminds me of the 'he's got a promising future and if he gets this on his record it will ruin his future' defence used for a different affluent male college student... during a R-word case... Fucking useless justice system.
should be noted, the gay panic defense is also grouped together with the trans panic defense, sometimes even used interchangeably. essentially, the idea is that being surprised by lgbt people is at least partial justification for murder or assault. you can see how this already morally questionable defense is further exploited by people being surprised by OTHER people finding out they're involved with an lgbt person and just saying they didn't know before. a concerning number of murders of trans women in particular have been reduced to a lesser offense or even acquitted because it was revealed that the man was sleeping with a trans woman.
Who the hell goes into such panic in those situations that they murder someone? I suppose I could understand being a bit upset or embarrassed if you didn't know they were tans/gay/whatever before getting started, but murder?
In the US folks will find other people’s handgun in a public bathroom every so often. When you’re concealed carrying a gun you often have to take it off your person to use the bathroom. Also you live in Czechia which has one of the highest rates of concealed carry in all of Europe so it’s possible you ran into one there. 26:33
The difference in attitude on drunk driving between the US and Europe is wild, but there are definitely practical reasons. In the majority of the US, there is virtually nothing in terms of reliable and safe late night public transit or taxi service, meaning at the end of the night your options are all bad or nonexistent. Combine that with our general macho car and drinking cultures and it is a recipe for both drunk driving and a system sympathetic to it. This makes what happened in the case Simon discussed even more wild, because these kids literally just chose to drink then drive, it wasn't even a matter of getting home at the end of a night like in most cases here.
14:10 This one is so stupid. I was 18 in Rehoboth Beach, at the time, with a cHuRcH group. I was hanging with a few friends & in the middle of a crosswalk, a guy passing the opposite direction ran his hand down my shoulder, arm, & stopped just before my ass as he walked . You don’t see me going crazy on every gay person I meet. I will never understand behavior like this. Defending it is wrong too.
You do realize that California is fucking huge right? I live in california and people often ask me... are you gonna go to LA for "whatever show is going on???". ANd I'm like yeah... let me drive fucking 10 hours down I-5 one direction to get to LA. I live in the center of california (as related to the coast) and I'm still 4 hours away. California is fucking huge dude... People in Europe think we're weird for not visiting other countries, but we have to travel crazy far to get to another country and the closest are Mexico or Canada. In the same amount of time you drive to another country we're barely a few towns over. I can literally drive for 14 hours straight at 70MPH (115 KMH) for 14 hours and never leave California. You all just don't fucking understand how big our state is. FOr us, visiting a different state is the equivalent to you visiting a different country.
"How do you steal a case of beer?" Well, maybe a supermarket has a special offer and they have cases of beer stacked on display outside the store. And those cardboard boxes have convenient handles built in. And now some teenager comes along with his bicycle, grabs a case and rides off on his bike. Of course this never happened, I did not do anything like this nor did anybody I know ever do this.
Simon, I am sitting here with wet shoes and soggy socks. Finally, for the first time in my life, I will give in to a TH-cam sponsorship ad and am going to buy Vessis (and yes I used your code!)
The "affluenza" defense is total BS: you cannot get an education in the US or even be exposed to any media without learning that some things are bad and most people suffer consequences. Alcohol tolerance varies person to person, and even in the same person it can vary due to any number of factors, so any time you take a drink, you have to realize that you may be impaired and driving is like Russian Roulette. Just because you may do it hundreds of times with no consequence, what happens the one time there is an issue is not worth it.
Huh, apparently the dreaded R-word is off-limits for comments as well? Not seeing my comment anymore about Brock Turner the struggle snuggler who struggle snuggles people...
On shoplifting beer; I'm actually a little more impressed by a friend who shoplifted vinyl records (33rpm) in his youth. When he told me these legendary past mischiefs I just couldn't see how this was possible to do stealthly 😅
I actually did find a gun at work. I work retail and someone forgot their gun in a fitting room. I called my manager (who freaked out, but I didn’t understand why). I took it back to the safe and proceeded to call 911. I calmly told them the store I worked at, the gun I found, and that I hadn’t touched it bare handed (I wore two layers of gloves and initially picked it up with a pen). They sent an officer who took down my statement and my identification information. Just as the officer was coming back with a case for it (as not to freak people out by them seeing an unholstered gun in a crowded store), the owner came and he and the officer left. Presumably to take care of it outside. I dunno what happened after that. But yeah. I did find a gun in a fitting room at work before.
How to steal a case of beer in the US: Put it in a cart. Walk out the door like you own the place. Done. And no, I'm not exaggerating. If you're going through all the trouble you might as well fill the cart...
Worked in Spar shop whilst I was going to college in my teens. People used to nick crates of beer all time when I was on shift. Think I had a bit of a reputation around town as the guy who never bothered to chase shop lifters 😂😂
Sort of, but not really. Dan White's lawyers were not arguing "the twinkie defence", it was misreporting from the trial which led to the coining of the term. They didn't argue that eating twinkies (and other junk food) was a reason why he murdered two people, just that the change from being someone who was previously very health conscience to someone who ate a lot of junk food was evidence of a change in his mental state.
Depends on how quick you were going, at least in Germany you do get away with about $20 if you're less than 10 kph/6 mph over the limit and 50 if it's less than 15 kph (slightly more when you're within city limits). It does go up to several hundreds and a revoked licence quite quickly. Though I'd prefer the scandinavian way where they charge you a percentage of your yearly earnings.
I remember the affluenza case when it happened. I was so pissed he didn't get jail time. Nice to know his crippling case of "too much money, too little sense" eventually got him in prison.
I disagree, Jeremy Kyle has non of the charm or humour of Springer and Kyles show is basically an hour of him berating and mocking poor and mentally ill people and goading them to fight (the guests are given access to a free bar in a hotel before the show, which just riles them up even more). Hes an incredebly unlikable, smarmy and unpleasant man who just seems to embody hate for entertainment. The show was eventually taken off air due to a couple of the guests offing themselves as a direct consequence of appearing on the show along with numerous domestic assaults caused by his dodgy dna tests and subsequent goading of the poor sap who agreed to do the test.
👟 Big ups to Vessi for keeping my feet dry! Check out vessi.com/blaze for 15% off your first order!
It's a shame that the first TH-cam advert I've ever been interested in, doesn't ship to the UK. The shoes do look lush.
😅😅😅😅
I've wanted to buy Vessi for some time now, but they don't ship to Europe. :(
I saw the gently used shoes on the the table. These better be as good as you say, fact boy.
These are pretty expensive unfortunately.
Tha afluenza defense should have gotten the lawyer, judge, attorney, and parents in prison.
"I didn't know any better my parents are rich"
Agreed.
Sadly under capitalism being rich is immunity to all crimes.
Now, now, some lawyer is going to get stuck with defending the guy. I think lawyers are supposed to defend their clients to the best of their ability. I think defense lawyers can be disbarred for intentionally throwing a case. It would be hard to prove, but I think it is written somewhere. Besides, at that point, lawyers could be bribed to throw without consequences. Corporations would love that. "Our newest executives are always the ones embezzling and failing to report safety hazards. Strange coincidence."
@Zebulization you can also refuse to take a case, or after you start, you can excuse yourself as a lawyer.
at a minimum once he was caught drinking afterwards it should have been the full 20 year sentence. He never should have gotten off to start, but most definitely not afterwards (2 years is nothing).
The Chewbacca Coke Zero bit is top tier and had my teen son and I rolling. 😂😂😂
I don't know how I've never seen that clip before, but I laughed hard, played it for my husband, and we snortlaughfarted 😂😂😂
it’s an absolutely perfect clip
Indeed
So I’ve actually met some of the Deputies who investigated Ethan Couche’s crash and they were still pissed, understandably. They also said “allegedly” the judge retired very soon after a very wealthy man
"allegedly"
Shocker
That actually makes a lot of sense. The most corrupt judges live in Louisiana and Texas. (As someone from Arkansas who has driven through those states many times and has plenty of family who has -- allegedly -- greased a palm of a corrupt policeman just to avoid having to stand before an even more corrupt judge, whose palm demands even more greasing.)
19:06 - Plot twist: The theme song for the show "Baretta", which made Robert Blake a more-or-less household name in the U.S. in the 70s, had a theme song called "Keep Your Eye On the Sparrow," which was sung by Sammy Davis, Jr., and had this as its second rhyming couplet: "Don't do the crime/ If you can't do the time."
*Irony!*
The song was written by famous keyboard composer/performer Dave Grusin (music) and musical artist Morgan Ames (lyrics). In the liner notes to the Sheffield LP "Dave Grusin: Discovered Again!", Ames said the first lyrics she came up with were this couplet: "Keep your eye on the sparrow / when the going gets narrow", and she fleshed it out from there.
Thank you for attending my TED talk.
Being drunk makes it less severe because the people who write the laws like to drink, and don't like the idea that getting drunk is wrong. The same way most of them don't smoke crack but may snort coke form time to time, leading to possession of an ounce of coke being less serious than a few grams of crack in most US states.
I'm normally the whitest guy in the Room The reason that they are so hard on crack Cocaine is originally it was a drug used by the minorities and the poor And in most cases the people writing the laws are wealthy and white
Yeah that's kinda a self-report, isn't it. Same with the laws against child marriages in some states.
That's a nice and very ignorant headcannon but it's far from reality
Lawyer: "He is too rich to understand consequences"
If im that judge: "He is about to learn..."
"in that case, Jail will be very interesting"
I remember there was a lady who was driving home one night and she hit a man on the road who died from his injuries. She wasnt charged with anything in that situation because she stopped immediately as she thought she had hit a deer and wanted to check on it but another driver who pulled up behind her told her to stay in the car because it wasnt a deer she had hit but rather a person. Emergency services were called and the woman was taken into the local station for questions. The man she hit was one of small cities regular drunks who could often be found walking home which was in a rural area on the outskirts of the city. If he wasnt stumbling home along the side of the highway he could often be found sleeping in the ditch off the roadside except this time he was stumbling along and decided to sleep on side of the highway mostly in traffic lane. It was one of those pitch black nights with no moon so the poor woman didnt even see him sleeping on the highway. It wasn't until she felt something hit the car and thinking it was a deer she had hit. This is one way a person can hit another and it be a complete accident on their part
" It was one of those pitch black nights with no moon so the poor woman didnt even see him sleeping on the highway."
You mean she couldn't be arsed to turn on her lights either?
@@aloeme I hate to be the one to tell you this but even with headlights on you can't always see things. I got lost trying to find my way home to ranch I lived on for over 15 years because it was simply too dark and foggy out. I couldn't tell the difference between the range road I was supposed to drive down to my house and one of those roadside pull over places. I only managed to find my house when I called someone to meet me on the end of the range road I was supposed to be on with their lights that I was finally able to track down the correct road and not end up in a field somewhere along the way. That's just another example of how even with lights on its possible to not be able to see clearly
@@aloeme dark/black clothing at night on a black road surface, you wouldn't see it
You've never seen an animal in your headlights and still accidentally hit them? Incredible driving my dude @@aloeme
"Leave the gun. Take the cannoli". From "The Godfather". I think that's what you remember.
to be fair, wouldn't any rage Dave that flew into be a blind rage?
Yeah, but it was Kevin who wrote this one
Awwwww mis-placed great joke… sad but still made me laugh
The one I remember the most is the Twinkie Defense during the trial of Dan White for the murder of Harvey Milk and George Moscone. The defense team used a psychologist to try to prove that he was depressed, and that the combination of depression and eating more junk food than usual (including Twinkies and Coca Cola) led to a state of diminished capacity. His first degree murder charge was changed to voluntary manslaughter because of it, reducing the amount of jail time significantly.
That's... mindblowing to me.
I read the Twinkie Defense originated in the UK.
TF, someone better tell hostess so they can put a disclaimer on the boxes.
We really are in the upside down
@@TGWazoo1 not according to google - and twinkies are a USA ''food''stuff
The "affluenza" kid served less prison time for killing four people than his mom did for money laundering. Shame on the judge, attorneys, prosecutors, and jury.
2:20 - Mid roll ads
4:20 - Chapter 1 - The affluenza defense
11:45 - Chapter 2 - The gay panic defense
18:55 - Chapter 3 - The murder of bonnie lee bakley
Thank you
doing gawds work
The hero we've grown to appreciate. Thanks!
I love the editors love of DBZA.
Thank you Team Four Star for changing the meme game😂
It makes me giddy every time a DBZ Abridged clip pops up on here. It also makes me want to rewatch the whole series every time. haha
For those who don't know, the Chewbacca Defense is where the attorney attempts to confuse the jury with unrelated facts and irrelevant information in the hopes that they collectively decide that the whole thing is nonsense and throw the case out. This is an actual strategy that sees occasional use, but it's named after an episode of South Park where a lawyer goes on a tangent about Chewbacca and the Ewoks in the middle of a court room. It works in South Park but Legal Eagle says it doesn't work so good in real life, so... don't try it.
It is actually based on the "gloves don't fit" defense utilized in OJ Simpson's murder trial. The South Park episode was parodying that defense.
"If the gloves don't fit, you must acquit"
More like if the gloves don't fit the defendant hasn't taken their arthritis medication for a week
I nearly choked on a piece of my Cadburys Button Egg when I heard that opening line to this video! xD lol
I definitely chocked for a few seconds…also on food. Definitely on food.
@@endearingteacup ohhhh yeah???!!! That’s what they all say.
Same, but a ressee's egg.
I was eating pizza, cheese sticks, and loaded french fries during this entire episode 😂😂😂😂 my mom thought I lost my mind when I spat out a big bite of pizza and started laughing 😅😅😅😅
Tis the season!
Venture Bros, Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law, and now Metalocalypse.
ma boi Julian had a good childhood
I did. Seems like you did too.
@@VulianJu Not to mention the Team Four Star clips! Your taste in clips and memes is just my teens and I'm here for it.
One thing I always hate about cases like the affluenza one is that focus gets put exclusively on the people who died while ignoring the even greater number of people who suffer life changing disabilities and continue to suffer for decades more as a consequence of his actions.
I strongly agree with Simon's opinions on what the punishment gor drunk driving should be.
In this day and age, there is no excuse for driving while drunk. Everyone knows the risks involved, and if you choose to endanger the public at large by drunk driving you should face serious consequences, not just community service.
In most EU countries, you're pretty much toasted if you're found driving over the legal limit. Not only that, but you're guilty from the moment you started your car, and this guilt supersedes most other faults.
So, if you're waiting "drunk" on a red traffic light to turn green and another car slams on you from your back, YOU are the one in fault, not the car that slammed you! This would not be the case if you were not drunk, but since you're drunk, you basically have no legal defense against almost all traffic laws. Also insurance does NOT cover you in that case.
Perhaps US should borrow some of these laws ?
@@djgeorgetsagkadopoulos I don't know about the insurance one because they don't deserve anymore breaks or reasons to deny coverage to their subscribers. Victims would also be left to flounder if they can't collect from insurance.
I think because young people can make extremely stupid and rashes decisions without fully understanding the consequences of their actions, imo, unless they harm someone, they should get one chance to make better choices without jail time.
@apriljk6557 insurance doesn't work like this here in EU.
Insurance will cover a major part of expenses related to damages against third parties, but then (if you are over the legal limit) they will come after you to collect the money (or a part of it anyway) they spent.
This ensures that third parties will get what they deserve, and also somehow makes individuals to think twice before driving drunk because if anything happens they will most likely have to pay for it eventually from their own money.
1st time offenders lose a license for 1 year . Spend the night in jail. Have to attend 15 weeks of education. And do community service. If it’s a second offense with a certain time frame of the first the penalty is often mandatory time - maybe an attorney can get this negotiated. If anyone was hurt - this is taken into consideration as well . The penalty is already quite high.
To anyone who isn't aware of what Jerry Springer's show was like, I highly suggest listening to the parody of the song "One Week" called "Jerry Springer" by Weird Al. It's a perfect description.
I always found weird Al yankovich to be surprisingly unfunny considering his level of fame... probably just me.
@@mikeharris5681I know what you mean (I think). Don't get me wrong Al Yankovic is a very talented individual but his humour is quite childish.
Or you look it up on YT 😂😂
@@mikeharris5681 he's had a few bangers, imo. People in the 80s were completely uncool and the prevailing humor was goofy and cheesy af. I mean, most of the content on TV wasn't very funny by today's standards, unless it's consumed as a parody of the strangeness of the time when sitcoms were filmed in front of a studio full of people and their reactions were part of the experience of the shows. There was some funny stuff but most of the stuff aired on TV had to appeal to a broad audience, including kids. So I think the mainstream was who WA would try to appeal to and that meant mildly funny, safe, and a broad audience of temporary attention from fans of him and/or the artist he's covering, rather than comedy fans and a lifetime of reverence to them. He chose to make a lot of money.
on Brain Blaze Simon talks about how good the FBI are at their jobs. So how about a Brain Blaze video of Some FBI solved cases that were notable and impressive
The Mirai botnet case would be a good one. It had grown so large, it became a threat to the very infrastructure the internet relies on to function.
So happy the "I don't understand" clip is back in this episode. I quote that clip because of this show, and I was at work singing it earlier XD
I randomly sing that and I have no idea where it originated lol
@@dallezzra8063Erika - I don't understand Bad Girls Club S9 Ep 4 "Girls Gone Ham" at 10m:20s
Dug for the meme
The fact that Beretta didn't use a Beretta is to me a most missed opportunity for a great joke.
As for your question about stealing a case of beer...put it in your shopping cart & walk out. Unless the store has an asset protection person that's "allowed" to put hands on the person, they'll just let them walk out.
The Sokolov defense from Casual Criminalist is the one that blew my mind.
bruh the backwards hat looks better on him than I expected
Robert Blake got his start in the movie series “The Little Rascals” also known as “Our Gang”, which followed the adventures of a group of children and was made from 1939-1944. There was a modern version created in 2014.
The last entry on here had me laughing so hard. Simon's delivery, the writing, and editing just hit peak during that entry.
I'm willing to listen to a lot of arguments, but I think after "I'm too rich for these peasant laws" my court date is gonna be the next one
I like you
WTF!!! The hook for this video is a cliff hanger for another video!!!!! That is both genius and evil!
I wish I had been selected as juror for a murder trial they were selecting for because I reeeeeally wanted to hear the defense.
Props to whoever edited this for using one of my fave Metalocalypse scenes
"I woke up with a clowns hands...in my pants. That's how my day started."
To be fair, he does cocaine
omg I need a pt 2 written by Kevin, those defences I need to know.
the gay panic is so crazy bc imagine the death toll if every woman being hit on when she didn't want it just straight up killed the guy 💀
There wouldn't be many men left
You seem to be missing the gay part of gay panic. As in it'd have to be another woman and women generally leave each other alone.
@@esmeraldagreengate4354lol doubtful
The Team 4 Star and Dethklok references have me rolling 😂
I’ve never understood the affluenza defense in the Couch case - truly wealthy people in America have no clue where a Walmart is and would not have to steal beer, underage or otherwise. His parents just suck.
The gay panic defence has massive roots in transphobia as well. There are far too many of us who've been murdered simply because transphobes figure out or suspect that we're trans. "I thought I was being hit on by a real woman/man but instead THEY'RE TRYNA TRICK ME INTO BEIN' GAY"
People just love being scared about literally anything - except the things we should be scared... Imagine what paradise we could have here on earth.
I'm bisexual and hate that gay panic has been repeatedly used as a legal defense. Full stop. Want to make it abundantly clear it is not okay and even in the case in the video it is not a valid defense and is just weaponizing fear and hatred of homosexuality and as you point out it extends into transphobia.
That said, as a bisexual who wouldn't have a problem with the fact that the friend was the same sex, I absolutely would have a problem with them not only dragging me onto television and effectively either forcing me to accept or reject them in front of countless witnesses against my will, but after rejecting them politely on such a grand scale if that person CAME TO MY HOUSE and continued to leave suggesting notes and hints about wanting to be with me intimately after a clear NO I would feel unsafe. I wouldn't do what this guy did and all out premeditate to end somebody, but I'd probably blast them on social media and firmly say I do not feel safe around them and do not want them at my home again, and if they come to my home after having made me unsafe and me having made such a public warning what happens is on them
Who ever worked on the edits for this video did amazing, I haven't laughed so hard at one of your videos in a while (I'm typically watching the dark ones which are not typically funny)
quality editing by Julian. Dr rockso was perfect
Simon's beard is getting huge lol
12:50 to 12:59 - Favorite line of the video. 😁
13:09 to 13:46 - Honorable mention. 😊
Yup, just got my vessis. Probably the best things ive ever put on my feet. I got the jacket too and that thing is amazing too
Knob and bellend, fantastic words!! 😂😂
As a #TexasGal I absolutely love how Simon gets so yee-haw happy. 😂
The Adult Swim cutaways in this episode were fantastic. Kudos to the editor.
"Please do that, dont be weird." Great advice for many in my generation.
You can be as weird as you want just don't be disrespectful and the s******* to other people, if you want to be weird among yourself and your friends and who cares man.
6:18 - Valium can be detected in the system for a month after use.
1:41 Seems the editor doesn't know what the Chewbacca defense is either, or he'd have put in an appropriate clip from South Park there. The coke can (which sounded like Chewbacca was interesting though!
For Simons benefit you steal a create of beer the same way you buy one... You just skip the going to the till bit and walk or run out with it depending on if security has spotted you or not. Sometimes its so easy to steal when people think you are being so blatant you must be a law abiding citizen. Slash claimed to have shoplifted a full size inflatable rib boat by just lifting it off the wall and walking off with it. He said he didn't need a boat he just liked to challenge himself to take bigger and more impressive things. Think he said he stole his famous hat😂 apparently he had a shoplifting addition
Yep. This restaurant had an electric guitar hanging on a wall as a decoration and some guy just took it off and walked out. Everyone was like: _"How does no one notice a guy stealing a guitar like that?!"_ .. But the truth is no one batted an eye.
Woah dude, our names are crazy similar..
@@maxbracegirdle9990 it's a fine name 😁 well I think so
Not forgetting the Shaggy Defense as used by R Kelly. "It wasn't me" despite the video tape showing someone really similar looking to you committing those crimes.
Ok at 13:14 that card, one of the "hand"s says "hard" 🤣 and I'm just picturing Skelator now saying the jokes on you!!
Vessi. Also great in autumn for those of us in the southern hemisphere. Love my pair
A literal LTC in the US Army left his dang pistol on a public bus and it fell between the seat back and the actual seat. A few hours later, he finally remembered where he left it and it was still there (even though many people had ridden that bus). So, it can happen. --- to complete this story, no. He didn't get in trouble because, just like the rich, rank has privilege.
Just say aww thank you! Like Peter Griffin when him & the guys got arrested, then he said "yeah they're gonna be really bummed when they find out I'm not gay" 😂
You just walk out with the case of beer, supermarket workers dont get payed to fight crime.
Don't forget the can of free dog food with every stolen create 😂
The cops they sometimes have there do
Not only do normal employees not get paid to stop you, if any of them actually paid any attention to training videos, they aren't supposed to do anything at all to stop you. They can actually be charged if they do.
The gay panic defence is outrageous I've heard it's been used when the perpetrator only found out the victim was gay after. So glad I don't live in the USA
I should imagine this defence has been used successfully by many homophobe. I know murder is murder and none of these people deserved to be killed, but somehow I don't think a defence used by people who committed other kinds of hate crime would be treated as a source of humour. 🙁
It's no longer allowed in the vast majority of states for what that's worth..
The enthusiam in the opening got my like . well done .
Also the Perjury Advice
Wooo, I was just wondering what to watch now when I watched all of TH-cam and new Blaze pops up! Off to procrastinate further...
I love the fact that the editor found Venture Bros.
You stole my comment 😂
@@obmarte3803 Sorry
"Are you shitting my pants?" - Simon
That first kid, his parents or somebody definitely paid somebody off.
The prosecutor or the judge probably
10:15 sounds like the the therapy rehab worked, he finally learned what consequences are.
And even how to avoid them further! 😂
The last minute of this absolutely killed me, fantastic editing.
the affluenza case always reminds me of the 'he's got a promising future and if he gets this on his record it will ruin his future' defence used for a different affluent male college student... during a R-word case...
Fucking useless justice system.
should be noted, the gay panic defense is also grouped together with the trans panic defense, sometimes even used interchangeably. essentially, the idea is that being surprised by lgbt people is at least partial justification for murder or assault. you can see how this already morally questionable defense is further exploited by people being surprised by OTHER people finding out they're involved with an lgbt person and just saying they didn't know before. a concerning number of murders of trans women in particular have been reduced to a lesser offense or even acquitted because it was revealed that the man was sleeping with a trans woman.
Who the hell goes into such panic in those situations that they murder someone? I suppose I could understand being a bit upset or embarrassed if you didn't know they were tans/gay/whatever before getting started, but murder?
@@ALLMINDmercenarysupportsystem if anything it shows they have very poor self control and they need a higher sentence as well as anger management
@@calebbean1384 I agree.
In the US folks will find other people’s handgun in a public bathroom every so often. When you’re concealed carrying a gun you often have to take it off your person to use the bathroom. Also you live in Czechia which has one of the highest rates of concealed carry in all of Europe so it’s possible you ran into one there. 26:33
Tangent time!!! Let's go Laser Eyes. Cheers from Tennessee
East, West or Middle? Lol
That's about all I know about Tennessee lol
sincerely your western neighbor
@@goosenotmaverick1156 West Tennessee. Western neighbor? Missouri or Arkansas?
“Are you shitting my pants” hahaha 🤣
Being too rich for jail is like being too smart for Cambridge. Apparently in law stupidity is not a handicap. Cheers....
The difference in attitude on drunk driving between the US and Europe is wild, but there are definitely practical reasons. In the majority of the US, there is virtually nothing in terms of reliable and safe late night public transit or taxi service, meaning at the end of the night your options are all bad or nonexistent. Combine that with our general macho car and drinking cultures and it is a recipe for both drunk driving and a system sympathetic to it. This makes what happened in the case Simon discussed even more wild, because these kids literally just chose to drink then drive, it wasn't even a matter of getting home at the end of a night like in most cases here.
I can't believe Simon doesn't know about The Jerry Springer Show!
14:10 This one is so stupid. I was 18 in Rehoboth Beach, at the time, with a cHuRcH group. I was hanging with a few friends & in the middle of a crosswalk, a guy passing the opposite direction ran his hand down my shoulder, arm, & stopped just before my ass as he walked . You don’t see me going crazy on every gay person I meet. I will never understand behavior like this. Defending it is wrong too.
I usually only go through my own gay panics after we've slept together and they're still here when my wife's car pulls into the drive
Love your very videos. Bright spot of the day.
Glad you enjoyed!
You do realize that California is fucking huge right? I live in california and people often ask me... are you gonna go to LA for "whatever show is going on???". ANd I'm like yeah... let me drive fucking 10 hours down I-5 one direction to get to LA.
I live in the center of california (as related to the coast) and I'm still 4 hours away. California is fucking huge dude... People in Europe think we're weird for not visiting other countries, but we have to travel crazy far to get to another country and the closest are Mexico or Canada. In the same amount of time you drive to another country we're barely a few towns over. I can literally drive for 14 hours straight at 70MPH (115 KMH) for 14 hours and never leave California. You all just don't fucking understand how big our state is. FOr us, visiting a different state is the equivalent to you visiting a different country.
True. I've been farther from where I was born than many Europeans and never left the country.
There’s a thing called airplane for visiting other countries.
@@dragonsdynamite6403Airplane tickets to another country are outrageously expensive. The only times I've flown overseas, Uncle Sam paid for it.
"How do you steal a case of beer?" Well, maybe a supermarket has a special offer and they have cases of beer stacked on display outside the store. And those cardboard boxes have convenient handles built in. And now some teenager comes along with his bicycle, grabs a case and rides off on his bike. Of course this never happened, I did not do anything like this nor did anybody I know ever do this.
Here is an idea top 5 deadly foods that look like a natural death at autopsy. inky cap mushrooms anyone?
Simon, I am sitting here with wet shoes and soggy socks. Finally, for the first time in my life, I will give in to a TH-cam sponsorship ad and am going to buy Vessis (and yes I used your code!)
I would love to see this episode with just trumps idiotic defenses
The "affluenza" defense is total BS: you cannot get an education in the US or even be exposed to any media without learning that some things are bad and most people suffer consequences.
Alcohol tolerance varies person to person, and even in the same person it can vary due to any number of factors, so any time you take a drink, you have to realize that you may be impaired and driving is like Russian Roulette. Just because you may do it hundreds of times with no consequence, what happens the one time there is an issue is not worth it.
13:11 Mind Twist
Surprised Brock Turner didn't make the list. His defense was basically "yeah he did it but it shouldn't be considered a crime"
You mean Brock Turner the rapist? The Brock Turner widely known for raping people?
And the judge said Turner was a good kid who shouldn't have his life ruined for making a mistake.
Huh, apparently the dreaded R-word is off-limits for comments as well? Not seeing my comment anymore about Brock Turner the struggle snuggler who struggle snuggles people...
@@MosoKaiserI was wondering why nobody had commented with his proper name.
On shoplifting beer; I'm actually a little more impressed by a friend who shoplifted vinyl records (33rpm) in his youth.
When he told me these legendary past mischiefs I just couldn't see how this was possible to do stealthly 😅
14:36 OMG I remember this. It was f'd up in multiple ways.
I actually did find a gun at work. I work retail and someone forgot their gun in a fitting room. I called my manager (who freaked out, but I didn’t understand why). I took it back to the safe and proceeded to call 911. I calmly told them the store I worked at, the gun I found, and that I hadn’t touched it bare handed (I wore two layers of gloves and initially picked it up with a pen). They sent an officer who took down my statement and my identification information.
Just as the officer was coming back with a case for it (as not to freak people out by them seeing an unholstered gun in a crowded store), the owner came and he and the officer left. Presumably to take care of it outside. I dunno what happened after that. But yeah. I did find a gun in a fitting room at work before.
How to steal a case of beer in the US: Put it in a cart. Walk out the door like you own the place. Done. And no, I'm not exaggerating. If you're going through all the trouble you might as well fill the cart...
How is 20 years the max penalty? So that is killing 4 people, stealing, and drunk driving averaging less than 4 years per crime.
Vehicular manslaughter has traditionally been treated as a lesser offense
Worked in Spar shop whilst I was going to college in my teens. People used to nick crates of beer all time when I was on shift. Think I had a bit of a reputation around town as the guy who never bothered to chase shop lifters 😂😂
Bring back epic blaze!!!
0:47 Always get a GOOD lawyer.
If I'm not mistaken the Twinkie defense WAS for murder
Sort of, but not really. Dan White's lawyers were not arguing "the twinkie defence", it was misreporting from the trial which led to the coining of the term. They didn't argue that eating twinkies (and other junk food) was a reason why he murdered two people, just that the change from being someone who was previously very health conscience to someone who ate a lot of junk food was evidence of a change in his mental state.
@@annabe21 still a pretty shit argument but definitely less ridiculous
13:13 Exactly, Brain Boy.
i like how the coins are still on the desk
$50 for a speeding ticket? That’s uber cheap!
That's what I paid 40 years ago!
Depends on how quick you were going, at least in Germany you do get away with about $20 if you're less than 10 kph/6 mph over the limit and 50 if it's less than 15 kph (slightly more when you're within city limits). It does go up to several hundreds and a revoked licence quite quickly. Though I'd prefer the scandinavian way where they charge you a percentage of your yearly earnings.
I remember the affluenza case when it happened. I was so pissed he didn't get jail time. Nice to know his crippling case of "too much money, too little sense" eventually got him in prison.
County jail time actually
I recon Simon should go on uncensored, be a great laugh
15:16 So sorry but there is going to be no competition for Springer as the King of Trash.
I disagree, Jeremy Kyle has non of the charm or humour of Springer and Kyles show is basically an hour of him berating and mocking poor and mentally ill people and goading them to fight (the guests are given access to a free bar in a hotel before the show, which just riles them up even more). Hes an incredebly unlikable, smarmy and unpleasant man who just seems to embody hate for entertainment.
The show was eventually taken off air due to a couple of the guests offing themselves as a direct consequence of appearing on the show along with numerous domestic assaults caused by his dodgy dna tests and subsequent goading of the poor sap who agreed to do the test.
25:50 And when you try to follow that "memory" you get increasingly dizy?
Dr Rockso is sooo fitting 😂
As a kid, I loved Baretta. I love the Sammy Davis Jnr title track too. Kee your eye on the sparrow I think?
Had to go look up chewbacca defence!! Thats wild!!