Hello you savages. The full episode with Richard goes live on Thursday - press Subscribe! Get 50% off your first Factor Meals box at factormeals.com/modernwisdom
@@ChrisWillx I really wish you wouldn’t have this guy on your show. He is very dishonest, and never addresses the actual problems that men face ( false accusations, and discrimination)
Problem is not with women having careers. Women should have a job to be independent from men. Problem is with women prioritizing career over family life. Every man wants to be succesful because succes results in having enough money to have a family. Modern feminism try to present the goal of having career is having money and living hedonistic life, the same thing feminists hate in rich hedonistic men.
Society itself is a testament to the "goodness" of man, however I often think we dont fully recognize that the baring that spins the fastest often heats up and breaks apart. there needs to be a talk about the ledger of man, Society wants man to be all good at all times, always self sacrificing, willing to take on danger/harm on behalf of others and always working hard but there has to be cons for the pros. Society has this weird thing where men are supposed to have no cons ONLY pros, and women have pros and cons but we now say there cons are just "another type" of pro. Men have a higher suicide rate, is this great? no HOWEVER it might be a byproduct of the fact men are required to do the most dangerous tasks and the part of the man that can cast aside the fear of danger to complete a task also makes him less adverse to suicide. "I wish men didnt care about sex so much" Imagine we had a genie who made this true and the result was a lot of women died... because coupled with that sex drive came a natural care for women to a greater degree that women have towards men, so more women were pushed into dangerous jobs, War and general conflict because mens natural desire to protect women (it being a byproduct tied to sexual desire) was reduced by 32%.... and most of the buildings and technology we enjoy also disappeared as it was coupled into the male sex drive to compete for a womans favour.
@@bigjuicefolife take time to realize what you have and how greatful you are to have it. Having more or searching for new because we get bored won't make you happy. That perspective comes from being in the moment with your dogs and being present.
/looks around/ Who said that!? 😜. I joke but I agree that's such a real thing that feeling of surplus and a whole society trying to tell you you're the bad guy. But I see you, you're there dude, and you got this 🙂
@@bigjuicefolifelucky you have dogs lol hey we aren’t gathering water from a well a mile away it sucks today but keep perspective. I have a buddy I was jelous of seemed like he had all I wanted now he’s divorced and can’t hardly see his 3 kids and is miserable. I’m not happy about that but I’m thankful I did not have that tragedy befall me I’m trying to help him through it now
As a therapist, please know you are not invisible and I am so sorry if us women, or society in general has made yall feel this way. Your feelings are valid; never forget that ❤
I agree this is a big problem. Not just coming from trolls online, it comes from main stream media and government. It is ironic as statistically men are having a much harder time on average.
We are not pulling away, we were pushed away. Both my parents as white collar professionals in their respective fields made more at my age when adjused for inflation and already had me and my brother. I, on the other hand, have to settle for less than market rate while I gain 10 yrs experience also as a white collar professional. We are all in different fields but I believe nothing would change had I followed in dad or mum's footsteps.
Market value and income are not the only, primary, or ideal sources of "purpose" for men. At least they ought not to be. My parents lived through incredible poverty but reportedly never lacked "purpose."
@colewhite3098 the point is, I can't afford the life my parents could at my age and I can't afford the lifestyle I got accustomed to growing up plus I can't find an employer willing to pay me the real market value of my skills. Everyone is cost cutting by offering below market rate like theyre doing me a favor because "no full time positions are available but we can offer you an internship" because they know it's a buyers market for labor. I'm still grateful for this job because I'd be out on the street or in my childhood bedroom without it, and that's where the retreat from society begins.
Got a job offer today that I really really needed, mentally. Edit: thanks for the love! Building a business alone on a single income, while refusing to go into debt. It's been really slow after I lost a advertisement avenue. Finally landed a gig that can really fund my next step. Contract terms pending, but I really needed this win.
The problem here is that nobody is asking why men are sedating in the first place, and why they are feeling unneeded. Sedation is not the reason, it’s the symptom. Look around over the last sixty years.
The amount of times I've felt unneeded or unworthy is my biggest struggle in life. A sense of purpose is an adult human need just as much as food and water.
As a lad there where places where men could go and be with male friends to do male things. The pubs, football grounds, work, saunas, gyms. There is no where legally that men can go to the exclusion of women. However much we love and need them that's just not healthy. There was a time when men could support men by just being in each others presence but now if we try we are sexist, far right wing or creeps.
As a woman I agree 100%. Both men and women do need their own spaces where they can hang out with their own sex. Interests are different, and points of view are funnelled through their experiences growing up as boys and girls, through the prism of their gender. We need to respect this and make it comfortable for men and women to have these spaces.
I mean we could all volunteer for Ukraine, but then again, that is terrifying. Just saw this news report ft. some middle-aged Ukrainian dudes with minimal training being sent to retake a position on the front. Their look of bewilderment/disbelief during the briefing was something to behold.
If I didn't have my job, which is the only thing I look forward to each day, I wouldn't have anything to live for. All my friends I made in high school and college spread out throughout the country so we effectively never see each other unless I make the effort to reach out and plan that we meet, but that's never reciprocated which have left me feeling invisible and unwanted. I know I'm supposed to make an effort to create new connections, but with 3 hours left each day coming back home from work I'm supposed to do groceries, cook, clean and work out - there's simply no free time. So the only real option is hanging out with a friend over discord until I have to go to bed each day. It's a cycle I find difficult to break, but if I whine about it like I just did none will listen or just ridicule me over how good I supposedly have it - life fucking sucks. At my age my parents already had a full life and with time to spare for a social life.
Could you give up just one evening to do a class at a night school in something that really interests you? It could make a big difference to your sense of achievement and help with developing a new interest and social life. Batch cook a few meals so you get ahead of cooking to give you some space to relax and go somewhere. Even a comedy club night out might break the monotony. Good luck 🤞
Just pick up the phone ! call and ask what going on!!! It does cost you any thing, except your time !!! Trust me they would love to hear from you !! I've done it !!!!!!!
Get off TH-cam and go do something. I started hobbies I enjoy again, and it’s been amazing. I even picked up some new ones too. Sitting and listening to to social media influencers telling you everything is shit all the time isn’t good for your mental health.
Bs. Good thoughts don’t get people better. Take action men! It’s the only way things will change. Seeking integrity has free programs S.P.A.A. Is a 12 step group for the addictive videos. You will be fat lonely and depressed if action isn’t taken. This nice person making this nice statement is called a liar and an enabler. Run into any in person meeting you can find asap because addiction is a progressive disease. It will get worse. It doesn’t magically get better. Pills won’t do it, doctors won’t and your loved ones CAN NOT do it for you although the unhealthy ones that need a 12 step program for codependency or will try. This is where agency matters. Man the hell up dudes! Action is the only way things change.
Bs. Good thoughts don’t get people better. Take action men! It’s the only way things will change. Seeking integrity has free programs S.P.A.A. Is a 12 step group for the addicted videos. You will be fat lonely and depressed if action isn’t taken. This nice person making this nice statement is called a liar and an enabler. Run into any in person meeting you can find asap because addiction is a progressive disease. It will get worse.
@@ChrisHops22 you give false hope to the turn around “ you’re right you won’t make it” to someone who points out your statistical inaccuracy did I trigger you?
I'm a 66yo female. First marriage 20 years, widowed when he died suddenly. Current marriage 20 years and counting. Two sons, 35 and 24. I was told decades ago that a man needs 3 things. Something to do (work, hobbies, etc.) Someone to love. Something to look forward to. I'd appreciate someone telling me if that's correct, why it's not, or if you'd add something to it and what that would be.
Men love feeling being needed and being told they’ve done a good job. It can be a simple thing like undoing a tight lid! The one thing that will make a man walk is to make him feel useless or inadequate. Have an argument by all means but never humiliate a man if you want him to stay. And never run him down in front of anyone. Men demand loyalty of those they wish to be around above everything else.
@@JM-yd9sm thank you for your comment, and I appreciate your additions to what I was told. The things you listed just came natural to me, so I consider myself lucky in that regard. Kind of falls along the line of treating someone as you'd want to be treated. I chuckled at the removing a right lid part of your comment. I have rheumatoid arthritis, and lids are the bane of my existence. I call my husband my hero for loosening them, and his hands the "jaws of life," because he can open the toughest of those kids. 🙂 Again, thank you for your comment.
I can confirm this. We want meaning in what we do, we want meaningful relationships, and we want to be part of something far greater than ourselves, and something we can look forward to manifest in the future.
Absolutely. We look forward to having a sense of serving, that’s were our purpose is fulfilled. I love doing honeydoo tasks for my wife when I’m not working or doing hobby stuff
I assume Reeves is going to continue with his message about masculinity being about giving more than you get back. Once you figure out who's on the other side of that equation - who's supposed to be getting more than they give back - you begin to understand why this is even being discussed at this point.
Lol you mean he is controlled opposition? I mean he's not entirely wrong, there is a psychologist called Thomas Joiner who talks about perceived burdensomeness, thwarted belongingness, and capacity for suicide as the three prerequisites for someone to commit suicide. We didn't evolve as islands, we evolved as pack animals, so our biology and psychology is designed to worry about our place in the group. But I get that nobody wants to be the nice guy sucker everyone takes advantage of.
I don't think Reeves would agree with that characterisation of his argument. I think there is real wisdom in understanding that giving and providing can be rewarding, satisfying, and give meaning, especially for men. If there's no appreciation given, sure, that's unlikely to give satisfaction, but often appreciation is all that's needed. I give my time and skill to a charity. I get nothing in particular back except the satisfaction of being useful and the thanks of others. They don't even have to give much thanks. So long as I don't feel taken for granted I'm fine
@@simonmackenzie6230That’s a big difference though, the average person would feel good being able to do charity, that’s how charity works. That isn’t the same thing as providing for someone else’s need by any stretch because no one would do so freely endlessly. Most people would charity as long as they could.
@@simonmackenzie6230 I've heard Reeves directly say what I referenced; in fact, I've heard at least one occasion where it was characterized by him as "Real masculinity", so shaming language was added.
It's not just young men my dude. I'm 42 and I find myself asking WTF is this on a daily basis. To be clear I am NOT talking about self harm. I'm just saying it's difficult to see the point of modern life when it's a constant circle j3rk of bullshit from the micro to the macro.
@@Mouffon nineties. Enough tech to make things interesting but not so much that it's taking over our lives. Can't speak to the political climate then cuz I was a kid😂
@@mmancino1982 it's learning to filter out all the bullshit that is the challenge. Getting sucked into opinionated and divisive non-issues that inflame and get reactions is causing everyone more stress than it needs to. So many of these social issues online get downright personal for us, but when you actually ask yourself how they are impacting your day-to-day life - they just aren't. With access to the entire world, sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it's okay to just worry about your immediate sphere and have NO strong opinion on international or even national issues.
@@mmancino1982 That's understandable. Sometimes I wish I was raising my kids in the 70s to 90s, although we do have a great community here and I'm happy with my kids' school. I definitely wouldn't trade today for any era prior to the 50s though. Despite any modern day bs, we are very fortunate to live in modern times.
My 82 years of life has shown me without a doubt that the worst thing one can tell a man is; you are worthless, un needed and/or unappreciated... and that is mostly what they hear these days. This will eventually be catastrophic for mankind.
There's a lot of truth in what you're saying. No one should feel like they're worthless or unappreciated, but it does seem like that's becoming more common these days, to be honest. It's tough because those feelings already take a toll on people and society as a whole. I think we need to do a better job of valuing each other and showing respect. Those small things can make a huge difference in the long run.
He’s exactly right. I had someone that I felt needed me and I needed them. It gives you so much motivation to put up with life. But they passed away and now sometimes I’ll just sleep all day because nobody cares if I get up or not. It’s such an empty feeling, knowing if I had a heart attack or something, nobody would even notice until the rent goes unpaid. Trust me, it can go from being needed and cared about to silence and isolation in a flash. I’m just happy I had someone at one point. Many don’t even get that. But yes, it’s very depressing. Like being in the bottom of a well, alone. It’s depressing, lonely, pointless and nearly impossible to get out of….
Hang in there. Get yourself out in the world. Find a new hobby, working out, sign up for a class. Things will come together for you. Sending positivity and prayers my friend.
Even if you just about have the energy to get up and have a shower, it proves there is some life force left in you. Small rays of light in the dark. You can grow this again and become bright enough to light up any room you walk into. Keep going mate, your partner would be proud of you! Share the good things they saw in you with the world. You can do it, and the world needs you to do it.
It's okay to take your time picking up the pieces. Start small, just do something that tells you you're alive each day, however small. Even just making a cup of coffee. Build from there. You still have fight in you!
He’s partly correct. Most men don’t feel they can ever have a family, afford a house, have any decent quality of life. I even struggle as high earner - I can’t imagine being in the bottom 50%.
Society has embraced modern feminism, which results in anti-male and anti-masculinity attitudes, and they simply don't care if men are struggling Lack of manufacturing jobs Lack of decent role models When a male role-model DOES appear, he gets attacked (like Jordan Peterson) Hey Chris, there's been plenty enough talk on the "why". It's time to step it up to "here's what we need to do".
@@bb.buchanan I'd say you're deadwrong. Why? Because it is already being done, both by men and women. However we can not erase in a few years what has been built up for decades. But there is a change occuring.
@@ronyeahwiggie729 What exactly is "already being done?" - shit is pretty bad out there and rapidly declining; I don't see anything other than boots on the street (which is what I was referring to) making the kind of changes necessary to stop this runaway garbage train. Things are still too comfortable, the love of bread and circuses is still more important to the masses than radical change.
@@bb.buchanan From where I am standing I see a change. People are resisting this madness and that only increases. Now i am not big on social media, but if youtube is anything to go by anti-narrative channelks and content is growing fast. On a personal level I encourage kids to question what is being told and taught and they see it themselves too.
Wow perfect timing for this video Video idea for Mr. Chris- perspective exercise How would you feel day to day if you WEREN’T in great shape, clean cut, upgraded, etc May be fun to get in the headspace of guys who are watching but are stuck in their weaker form of self Example- when I am out in the world and flowing I come alive, my speechcraft is sharp, and my general sense of being is well BUT once I look in the mirror at my mild acne scars, my skinny fat build, my unplanned haircut, posture, etc I suddenly feel as though I don’t have the right to move confidently through the world because I am so far from “my best self” Even with all the tools to do well I put them down (metaphorically) out of shame of who and what I am Tomorrow I start my break from my adhd med (the big one, alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, “etc” This video was very well timed (at least in my own egocentric view of what I have to work on hahah) Keep up the excellent content please, and take time to yourself when needed to recharge your battery (unless it really is true that there is no such thing as overworked just underrested “insert bicep flex emoji” ) This channel is doing for me what Peterson and Harris have done for many others It truly is part of my journey to finally become who I was always supposed to be -Dino (31, Male, Philadelphia)
I never thought about the flexibility in purpose, but you are right. I have noticed a trend in men sticking to one thing and making it the sole purpose. Usually, it is their job.
You can’t throw a rock without hitting a news story about the loneliness epidemic in men and how men feel alienated. You’re being listened to, you just aren’t being handed a solution.
@@Kevin-ts7hf LUCK!! I was going to the gym one day, and there was a mentorship program asking for men to sign up. I did, and mentored a boy for 3 years. That turned into a passion, and I currently am in Grad School to become a Student Counselor. Helping the youth validates my existence!
I really don't like this conversation. I am a man who loves to cooking, and iron my own clothes and has no problem sharing the child rearing duties, because that's what my Dad did for me. However, because I am 34, only have a bachelor's, make 71k, and a roommate in DC, I am X'd out by many women. They do not want to share those duties unless you take care of everything else. BTW I even volunteer at several organizations (including mentoring), and the women say they value that, but can't be with me.
This other guy says your noble. I say your doing exactly what you should be, which is taking responsibilty. Any potential partner or friend who doesnt think you are good enough clearly isnt worth your time and is not on the same level of maturity as you are and thats ok not every one is at this stage and willing to or even capable of taking responsibility for anything.
Know this: you're doing it. The X-ing out by many women is a comment on themselves and their own perception / illusion of fulfilment than you. Keep on keeping on!
Men in marriages aren't "allowed" to have his old friends, or hobbies....well at least not allowed to without a wife constantly creating drama "why don't you want to spend time withMEEEEE ? *sobs*'" or "you don't love MEEEE" or accusing him of going out with "the boys" just to go "cruising for chicks/strippers", whatever stereotype she has in her head of what a bunch of guys do. I've seen it, and experienced it, countless times, and the women are just as likely the ones who later are determined to be the serial philanderers. I did marriage once, and several years after the divorce finally got custody of my youngest daughter who was both neglected and physically assaulted by the "mother". My sense of meaning was being a better father than I had, and being a respectable Lt. firefighter to my crew.
Really fascinating topic on the variability of life’s meaning across genders. I imagine this plays a big role in the challenges men face maintaining relationships over time. We often prioritize work at the expense of the close relationships that actually bring the most happiness. I compare myself to my sister, who’s much better at keeping close ties-something I can really learn from. Beautiful clip!
Its better being invisible and doing your shit without complaining than taking the shit thrown at you by others all your life in the name of responsibilities etc.
We're living in a synthetic world. A natural world would have plenty of problems and struggles for survival. A natural world is harsh but it's an honest one. This synthetic world that we live in is safe but aimless.
A man needs a purpose in life. For most, it's their families. I wish I could have that chance. I've done the work and put myself out there. Turns out I am invisible. As a short guy 5'5 grown man, I understand I am disadvantaged, I am simply not even considered. I understand the female nature, instincts that attract women to taller men. Women don't want me but I'm still a hopeless romantic. I just want somebody to love and love me back. Maybe that's a fantasy. Now I wish I don't have these desires at all and wish to forget women all together, I'm invisible anyways so why torture myself. My purpose is me alone, find purpose, peace and happiness alone.
Bro there’s plenty of short kings out there. You say you’re a hopeless romantic? Read some romance books and talk to women about them dude. Do the things in the books with them. Also your women instincts part is nonsense.
There used to be a fairly obvious "use" for the unique things men had to offer. Its not so obvious now that technology has supplanted a large number of men in the workforce and relationally.
Lots of people are here volunteering for disaster relief, but what we need most are people strong and healthy enough to do debris removal and skilled with heavy equipment to fix roads. Not that a woman couldn't do that, but I couldn't beat a man in a debris removal race!
I’m a Christian. Grew up in a good Christian home with loving parents. From the time I was a little boy going to public school, I encountered subtitle to openly hostile statements against Christianity from teachers, tv movie media depictions, etc. (I remember my second grade teacher saying Christians didn’t really care about science because they’ll just do what their church tells them). My parents response to this was always simple saying Jesus said his followers would be disliked or even hated. As I aged of course, the hostility became more ugly and open (I had a college professor say Christians should have to register as such and shouldn’t be given certain civil rights like voting, since they’re a bunch of crazies) - to clarify, not of these teachers, classmates were ever directly unkind to me. They were often very kind, just had a lot of hang ups about religion. I say all this because though my entire life, my faith has given me comfort, and purpose. I’ve been discouraged, stressed, sad, but never nihilistic or purposeless. I know the hostility that religion gets often stems from the frustration that the secular have with religious people being irrational, taking things on faith, or being manipulated by religious systems, (much of these things are undoubtedly true) but I’ve always been surprised that the existential peace and purpose derived from religion seems to be endlessly overlooked as a positive by the secular. Simply put, would we rather convert people to materialists that the potential for accompanying misery and nihilism is worth the cost? I’m not sure it’s a good trade.
We KNOW we're needed. We're needed to quite literally run society. All of it. Every aspect. And we DGAF. We're sick of literally keeping society functioning and being attacked and badgered endlessly for it. It's FAR less "Oh poor me I'll just end it." and far more "Fine. I fucking quit. Fuck you." It's going to be interesting to watch when men walking away hits critical mass and society completely falls apart. TF you think Elon is building robots for? Lol.
@@MouffonI don’t think he means specifically we as in he but we as a demographic, which, I think it’s like 90% of infrastructure is done men. IE, most violence is made, that doesn’t mean the mass majority of men are violent.
Yea as a single man it is true once a guy gets married they do drop their male single friends. I don't know why the woman disdains their husband having single friends. I guess it comes down to that the man will walk miles for a vertical smile. I have noticed that women will tell their women friends something that should be said to the man directly about. We are married now we can only associate with other married couples. Do women see this as sort of a competition? I will say it's like I am not asking your husband out for a beer or go to a pro game every week.
That's crazy. I never dropped any friends when I got married and neither did my friends. Is this something younger men are really doing? (I'm in my 50s)
It's probably the same reason that some men will tell guys 'don't let your girl go out with her single friends', -insecurity. The relationship status of anyone's friends should be irrelevant, if they're a good friend that's all there is to it. That being said I do think partners sometimes get used as a kind of 'get out of jail free card' when people actually don't want to go out but won't just say that 😅
@@tempsoda Yea I heard Rich Cooper say that about women who want to go on girl trips. A woman is supposed to be a compliment to your life not add chaos to it or cheat on him. This guy does think he is God's gift for women though.
Cognitive self complexity.....multiple sources of "identity" - meaning (inherent value), purpose (place/sense of value in community) and "power" autonomy. Where are, (medium growing in) and how deep, are my roots.
I’m a woman and I just want to say that there are lots of women who desire a traditional masculine man. But I live in the south in a small town and have traditional values. If you are in the north or a city, traditional women are hard to come by.
I’m 70, female. I’ve watched this progression over the past 50 years. I worked full time and made twice the money my husband made. I am staunchly independent and self-sufficient a proud of my accomplishments in a number of arenas. But I have come to two conclusions. 1. Contrary to popular belief, most women would dearly love to be a stay at home mother during the first 15 years or so while child rearing is intense and demanding. The pressure on women from working and managing home-life is incredible and may actually influence the divorce rate. 2. If men would like to address their changing role, the economics need to be addressed. With the cost of housing, cars, etc., can men afford to be the only breadwinner and keep their families in comfort? Most can no longer do so compared to the boomer generation. So focusing on economic policy making is the only way to give women the space to not have to work while childrearing. Finally, men have an absolutely essential role in the life of a woman. It doesn’t look the same as men from the 1940s when the only thing men had to do was to bring home a paycheck. A man’s role is even more important now because he needs to model to his family what being a team player looks like. Model what being a loving man looks like to his children by being involved at a deeper level than our grandfathers were. It’s down to a finesse level now, not just looking over and seeing him parked in his easy chair. It’s a finer, finesse based existence men are struggling with.
Beautifully expressed. And I agree 100%. The problem though, is that such wisdom only comes after a lifetime of observation. In today's world, a lifetime of perspective is sought out, listened to, or enough to make a person of a younger generation fundamentally change. Technology is no longer beneficial in this area. The constant, addictive, onslaught of new noise and information overload, drowns out and dilutes our ability to value actual human value.😢
I agree with all this, but to extend, this finer experience must also be rewarded as well. It can’t be strictly just “men need to learn to show a finer experience” because if the opposite is rewarded, that’s what will be brought instead. Case in point, men have slowed on the versions of dates they do because it was through trial and error found that “better” dates weren’t more successful. IE, kids today wanna be TH-camrs because they see that as successful. What women want men to be has to be shown to be rewarded or it’ll just be another stopped idea like any other version of men.
@@thewolfex1 I agree. It seems like people forget men prefer to be simple, so things like acknowledgement for putting in effort and actually trying to accomplish something goes a long way. Now we don't need this every single day, but I've seen many women agree with one another that they "don't want to have to mommy you". Showing encouragement isn't "mothering" someone, it's being a decent human being, so it really says a lot to us men if you look down upon us for wanting that from time to time.
@@user-og6hl6lv7p To not even begin to talk in degrees on whether or not what women want seem to be fathers. Which by the way, if both sexes seem to want there opposite gendered parent in partner form, in what world wouldn’t that make perfect sense anyway? Who else would you get your model for what a mother-parent or father-parent should be like in day to day life? Who else would you get a baseline experience of the opposite gender?
I like to listen to these talks and benefit from them but it's a shame the spiritual dynamic to life is rarely discussed. It's good to talk about the emotional and physical needs but to ignore the spiritual will always leave you wanting.
As a white heterosexual conservative Catholic man I have been told that I am useless. The magnitude is further increased when you account for the current dating market.
Wow, what is more than a trifecta? Ha. I’m in same boat, but not Catholic…. We are the last “identity” that can be discriminated against and ridiculed in polite circles. As a commentator above pointed out, no one wants to hear if you are struggling. Just know brother, you are still needed and contribute to society.
The male protector and provider model is BIOLOGICALLY constructed, but socially ENFORCED. It won't change, unless our biology changes. And the problem here is fatherlessness. No two ways about it. That's where it starts. And I don't know how many times I've already said this on this channel, but every social problem we're having nowadays is directly caused by this.
Throughout history, in most societies, "becoming a man" was a right pf passage, something you had to participate in and fundamentally achieve something, generally oriented towards society. Becoming a woman meant having your period, purely biological. It has always been understood that being a man is more than getting your first boner. Somehow the importance of that achievement portion has been lost along the way.
J D Unwin did an interesting study on the direct correlation between the decline of cultures and their tendency towards sexual freedom. It’s difficult to deny his data from 86 civilizations.
Who defines sexual freedom? A person who came to America on the Mayflower (1620) would have a very different concept of sexual freedom than a founding father in 1776 than a cowboy in 1890 than a sailor in 1944 than a 2nd wave feminist in 1975 than an Incel in 2024. That books take away is that societies fall apart within 3 generations of an increase in sexual freedom and that’s obviously bunk as the above example shows.
Every man I know over the age of 30 who possesses at least an ounce of pride in his masculinity is clearly dying on the inside if his wife earns more money than he does. It’s clear that he feels unneeded and it’s slowly killing him every day, even if it’s something he would never openly admit.
I’m over 30 and I was in a 6 year relationship with a woman who made more than me. It did not kill me at all, I make 6 figures, but my self worth is not based on how much money I make. Our relationship only got into trouble because she was STILL very financially dependent on me, despite making more than me.
I dated and lived with a woman for 2 years who made more than triple what I made. It never made me feel lesser than, but SHE made me feel lesser than plenty of times. Even though I was actively taking classes, working two jobs, and taking care of the house - it was never enough for her. It was her disdain for me not making more that killed me. Every chance she got, she would dangle the fact that she was the breadwinner over me in some passive-aggressive manner.
I think some guys make the mistake of thinking that all women are looking for a guy to outearn them. Every woman has access to those men. And sometimes that IS what they are looking for. But sometimes it isn't.
45 years old. Been with wife since teens. She has always earned more. I am a codependent, working in between the school run, doing child care, cooking, cleaning etc. My school run days as nearly over, and I suspect my usage from her will be too. 4 months ago I discovered her behaviours and traits are that of a covert narcissist. I am thoroughly depressed and my joy in life is restricted to my two boys. Without them, I really have nothing anymore. Stay strong lads. ❤
@@Richatyourzenith I specifically said “wife” because married and unmarried are significantly different types of relationships in terms of the extent of psychological toll I mentioned above.
I think the problem lies in the unrealistic expectations of women in dating. "Six foot, six figures", etc. When only the top 10-20% of men are considered to be viable mates by women, what are the other 80-90% supposed to do? I was just looking at my retirement numbers today. If not for having a wife and my youngest son to take care of, I could easily retire tomorrow (age 50) and live comfortably. Now think to a 30 year old man with no prospect of ever having a family. What does he really have to labor for?
Maybe labor for his own self fulfilment to be a good addition to the community around him? Also this echo chamber online of women’s expectations are not a reflection of what the average woman ends up dating in reality.
Women have been told they are needed in the work force because they are another crop of working bees that doubles the work force and keeps wages low. Meanwhile more and more technology develops and consumers are bombarded with products they are convinced they need to buy - the latest, newest gadgets, innovations, beauty products. Single men become a problem because they don't spend much and they lose the urge to keep working hard, make money, pay taxes, create and provide for family, etc. The other problem becomes that women workers replace men workers, which affect quality and production. It's all about control and manipulation of people, so the real owners can benefit from continuously. They need everyone to be very ambitious, working and spending for the system to work. And if people don't do it, they will event and develop AI and robots to do it soon.
Hello guys. Nobody can stop you working out and getting stronger and healthier. Nobody can stop you educating yourself and getting wiser. Nobody can stop you from enjoying your hobbies and cultivating a talent. But yourself. If you’re lonely - try reconnect with past friends or acquaintances. I’m lucky enough to still be mates with my 5 guys from primary school. And we only meet up nowadays once every couple months. But they’re always there. And it’s worth it. I hope this is more helpful than self righteous condescension. You just gotta do shit.
As we get closer to the End Times and Great Tribulation, the "wrestling" conversations and solution proposals just get interesting and futile at the same time.
28 y old male, from affluent mid class family. College educated. Worked decent jobs. Got addicted to Kratom- made stupid finical choices. Now living back at home. At a total point of absence of meaning- yet realizing that the task at hand is really to just take full responsibility and connect with the notion of consciousness, God, what have you. Guard my attention and have more discipline and get back out there. But right now, yo. I ammm a totalllll loser haha. Also gotta drop that narrative. But out here and certainly feeling the total sense of self annihilation
I’m 26, went to college, parents divorced, never dated until I was 24. Married my first girlfriend a month ago, promotion coming in January where I’ll make 6 figs. I guess my point here is life seems very dull at times. I was going through it from 19-23. But it can change just as quick as anything else. Never stop trying to meet people, chase your dreams, invest in your passions. Oh and get a dog, they cure all wounds man Life is short and always has a way of working out eventually, just gotta stay mentally tough
It's more than just not feeling a sense of purpose, or being useful. It's also not being respected or appreciated, being treated poorly or unfairly, and not being taken seriously if one complains about it. It's being outright vilified, ridiculed, and too often ignored. And for divorced men, it is too often about having that which is most precious to them, that which they were literally bred to protect, their children, taken from them, alienated from them, and having no real recourse against the slanted, heartless system that took them from them in the first place. Being rendered not so much useless, but powerless and humiliated. And finding little to no hope that the situation will change for the better.
Women are directly connected to the Eternal I would say, through mothering. Men don't have that, they need women as an intercession. If you cut that link, men simply loose this and obviously loose hope as well. It's more than purpose, it's basically the lack of grace in religious terms. It's possible to get around it, with communities and so on, but it's not as natural and really not the same. It's kind of dry and not convincing, although for a minority it works. It takes a lot of work to make it this way and usually it is done through actual work. Of course if you take that away, there is nothing left. Reeves is a bit optimistic, he thinks it's about "challenges" and not wanting to face them. That's completely false, it's more that men are not allowed to have challenges and if they do take some, are considered bad, so you don't get any validation, no community, no women and probably no friends either. It's inculcated very young as well, where taking chances for a man is punished while women doing it are rewarded. So of course people will feel valueless, they were abused all their lives and since they are providers, people that are supposed to care, they will instead internalize and hurt themselves and not allow themselves to be happy. And the adult society will also make sure you don't make it, unless you are considered useful by a woman temporarily, or are nice looking, or a good personality in some ways. But it's extremely precarious and conditional. So yes, I don't think any society has ever abused their children this way, so it is pretty much game over. There is no turning back and such a society does not deserve to live anyway. The world is much better off without it. Reeves is correct about that part, but he thinks some rats can leave the boat and save themselves. Not really.
Hey Everyone 🤠 Find the parts that interest you: 0:00 - Discussion on young male suicide increase 1:20 - Importance of feeling needed in society 2:34 - Higher suicide rates among divorced men 3:38 - Exploring women's roles in modern society 5:30 - Women's evolving roles in society 6:43 - Men's traditional roles and their changes 8:20 - The importance of fathers in family dynamics 9:30 - Greater male variability in roles 10:44 - Cognitive self-complexity explained 11:54 - Men's identity tied to work Recap by Bumpups ✏️
But women have forgotten about the kids. Daycare, schools, and iPads are raising children nowadays, and the kids are not alright if you look at their mental health.
1:50 ... Mr. Reeves, there does come a point where "feeling of being unneeded" becomes, "the World is really better of without me." The resolution comes from the realisation that ... that may be today, but there will be more days. So the resolution is found with an understanding that your primary task is to become stronger in Character tomorrow, than you are today. Doing that is a Long Process, but it a doable task ... if you have such will to proceed ... to Marshal Forward.
No individual is 'needed by the world' and that's a good thing. I don't relate to anything in this video. If you do you need to change your direction in life.
Funny that he sounds so intelligent while speaking about what's wrong with men now. Then, he mentions that being able to physically defend yourself and fight your own battles is not as important in our modern society. Yet, he fails to consider a link between the two coexisting conditions. Humans never stopped being animals and never will. It's unscientific to believe otherwise. Accepting uncomfortable truths leads to growth in individuals and groups.
I think men can be bad at making friends. Although, some women will insist that their husband/boyfriend drop their friends. She will want to hang out with her friends.
I don’t know why you have this guy on your podcast. He is a known liar, and offers a very dishonest perspective on why many men are struggling . Really wish you would call him out on it
@@MW-dd8vk is this a serious question ? He has lied about there being no discrimination against boys in schools from female teachers even though there is a lot of evidence of this. Much of it has been documented by women. He also claims that the reason men are committing suicide and dropping out of school and work is because they “lack purpose “. This is nonesense. It is because they are being hated and discrimination against. They face false accusations that can ruin their lives, and there is no recourse for this. Check Erin Pizzey’s video on male suicide.( she was the creator of the first domestic violence shelter for women btw) He never addresses discrimination against men, and he never addresses false accusations. Apparently our suffering has nothing to do with women . But then he claims that women’s suffering has everything to do with “sexism” . If you believe that, you’ll believe anything.
@@JR-hh8jsSo according to you the sole purpose of men’s suffering is women discriminating and hating them? This man is well versed in his claims but you think your conclusion makes has greater validity because? I think it is important to recognise when you are projecting your own personal perception of what is happening in the world, not just broadly state what another states is just lies
@@tshegom03 look up CH Sommers, Erin Pizzey, Janice Fiamengo. All women who are much older than I and have been heavily involved in improving the world for women. All of them say exactly what I just claimed. I suppose they are wrong as well ? Also, you haven’t disproven my claim about them being discriminated against. You just deny it exists. There is tons of evidence for this.
@@JR-hh8js I looked up the first two. I do actually admire what was stated on the brief biographies of their works I read. But you did not answer my question, you truly believe that the sole suffering of men is because of women discriminating and hating them? I am not American so I speak about on a global scale I don’t think men having a crisis is because of being discriminated against. The are many attributing factors such as growing up with no male figures, socioeconomic circumstances, no sense of community, and a lack of understanding of what a man’s role in society can look like in a healthy way in 2024. Where I live I have yet to hear of any case where a man/boy has been discriminated against because of his gender/s3x.
You have to have a pretty low contentious these days to navigate a high economic status these days. Look just at the pseduo behaviors that are simultaneously are going on in the world, in the name of profit and no morals involved. For example, look how we tie money to humans especially woman. Marketing, sex, materialism, insecurities through body imaging (throw plastic surgery at them), and you can see how alot of men would see this from an outside point, is how broken and flawed everything is. Woman really want men and want that strength and security that they bring. But if you just keep throwing money at them and push them to be independent, then you are lying to them, because I wouldn't have someone who is so "high and mighty" would be into me, if there wasn't some random pull that you can't explain. You are supposed to see your partner as someone who would would be a good representation of your children, like if my partner were to raise my kids or i were to raise hers, we wouldn't produce some wild offspring that had inclinations of hating their parents, due to their irresponsibility of finding a proper partner. I'm glad I'm born, but I hate the life that I had to endure cause of it, my partner is going to be a reflection of who I am. So either or of us, can raise the children and they will be completely understood, since both parents accept and know their confines and project that to the children. And to boot, since were okay with our proclivities and are less likely to clash, we are therefore a better leader for our children and lead by example, how we would want our children to live. I'm a child of optics parents when it first started to become a thing. DON'T BE FOOLED.
I watched my Dad get eaten alive financially as a divorced single guy with three kids. He suffered severe depression, and barely pulled himself back up and out of it…in the early to mid-2000s…doing that now takes superhuman resolve and grit because we’re so deeply entrenched in societal pressures and dysfunctionally attached to devices and media that literally carry out a form of warfare on your brain. Our values shift tectonically under our feet all the time, and what we grew up with and saw as true for so many years has now been distorted until we just feel cynical about ourselves and our country instead of clear-headed, knowledgeable, and proud to be here.
Feel like 90% of the clips on this channel are about men's problems, loneliness, body image, feeling lost, lacking purpose and so on and it's honestly getting boring. FIND your own purpose, build your own story, become your own main character, don't get dragged down by doomer videos like these. I truly believe that if you don't watch content that drags you down but instead surround yourself with inspiring and uplifting messages, start working on yourself, following your dreams and passions, starting to build on your dream, YOU WILL FIND YOUR PURPOSE. With that, I will be unsubscribing from this channel.
Hello you savages. The full episode with Richard goes live on Thursday - press Subscribe! Get 50% off your first Factor Meals box at factormeals.com/modernwisdom
@@ChrisWillx I really wish you wouldn’t have this guy on your show. He is very dishonest, and never addresses the actual problems that men face ( false accusations, and discrimination)
Problem is not with women having careers. Women should have a job to be independent from men. Problem is with women prioritizing career over family life. Every man wants to be succesful because succes results in having enough money to have a family. Modern feminism try to present the goal of having career is having money and living hedonistic life, the same thing feminists hate in rich hedonistic men.
Society itself is a testament to the "goodness" of man, however I often think we dont fully recognize that the baring that spins the fastest often heats up and breaks apart.
there needs to be a talk about the ledger of man, Society wants man to be all good at all times, always self sacrificing, willing to take on danger/harm on behalf of others and
always working hard but there has to be cons for the pros. Society has this weird thing where men are supposed to have no cons ONLY pros, and women have pros and cons but
we now say there cons are just "another type" of pro.
Men have a higher suicide rate, is this great? no HOWEVER it might be a byproduct of the fact men are required to do the most dangerous tasks and the part of the man that can cast
aside the fear of danger to complete a task also makes him less adverse to suicide.
"I wish men didnt care about sex so much" Imagine we had a genie who made this true and the result was a lot of women died... because coupled with that sex drive came a natural
care for women to a greater degree that women have towards men, so more women were pushed into dangerous jobs, War and general conflict because mens natural desire to protect
women (it being a byproduct tied to sexual desire) was reduced by 32%.... and most of the buildings and technology we enjoy also disappeared as it was coupled into the male sex
drive to compete for a womans favour.
What time does this go live ?
I’m a 65 year old male and I feel invisible at times, so it’s not just youngsters.
@@bigjuicefolife take time to realize what you have and how greatful you are to have it. Having more or searching for new because we get bored won't make you happy. That perspective comes from being in the moment with your dogs and being present.
/looks around/ Who said that!? 😜. I joke but I agree that's such a real thing that feeling of surplus and a whole society trying to tell you you're the bad guy. But I see you, you're there dude, and you got this 🙂
You are all loved and cared for even if it doesnt feel that way. This world is a better place with you in it ❤
Chad Williamson hasn't felt invisible in a very long time, however he doesn't represent the common man.
@@bigjuicefolifelucky you have dogs lol hey we aren’t gathering water from a well a mile away it sucks today but keep perspective. I have a buddy I was jelous of seemed like he had all I wanted now he’s divorced and can’t hardly see his 3 kids and is miserable. I’m not happy about that but I’m thankful I did not have that tragedy befall me I’m trying to help him through it now
Most of us men feel invisible passing through society and if any say anything all its met with is "poor you your a man*
As a therapist, please know you are not invisible and I am so sorry if us women, or society in general has made yall feel this way. Your feelings are valid; never forget that ❤
I agree this is a big problem. Not just coming from trolls online, it comes from main stream media and government. It is ironic as statistically men are having a much harder time on average.
We are not pulling away, we were pushed away. Both my parents as white collar professionals in their respective fields made more at my age when adjused for inflation and already had me and my brother. I, on the other hand, have to settle for less than market rate while I gain 10 yrs experience also as a white collar professional. We are all in different fields but I believe nothing would change had I followed in dad or mum's footsteps.
Market value and income are not the only, primary, or ideal sources of "purpose" for men. At least they ought not to be. My parents lived through incredible poverty but reportedly never lacked "purpose."
@colewhite3098 the point is, I can't afford the life my parents could at my age and I can't afford the lifestyle I got accustomed to growing up plus I can't find an employer willing to pay me the real market value of my skills. Everyone is cost cutting by offering below market rate like theyre doing me a favor because "no full time positions are available but we can offer you an internship" because they know it's a buyers market for labor. I'm still grateful for this job because I'd be out on the street or in my childhood bedroom without it, and that's where the retreat from society begins.
@@obviouslyasockpuppetneither can women dude. Thats a capitalism problem not a gendered problem
Got some bad news. White collar jobs gone soon due to AI. Think about, and work on; plan b.
Got a job offer today that I really really needed, mentally.
Edit: thanks for the love! Building a business alone on a single income, while refusing to go into debt. It's been really slow after I lost a advertisement avenue. Finally landed a gig that can really fund my next step. Contract terms pending, but I really needed this win.
Congratulations!
Way to go man! Congrats 🎉
Job is important, either to provide. Or to improve the world.
Be needed / sense of purpose.
keep it up man!! a lot more victories to go
Huge Odin, congrats man
The problem here is that nobody is asking why men are sedating in the first place, and why they are feeling unneeded. Sedation is not the reason, it’s the symptom. Look around over the last sixty years.
The amount of times I've felt unneeded or unworthy is my biggest struggle in life. A sense of purpose is an adult human need just as much as food and water.
As a lad there where places where men could go and be with male friends to do male things. The pubs, football grounds, work, saunas, gyms. There is no where legally that men can go to the exclusion of women. However much we love and need them that's just not healthy. There was a time when men could support men by just being in each others presence but now if we try we are sexist, far right wing or creeps.
As a woman I agree 100%. Both men and women do need their own spaces where they can hang out with their own sex. Interests are different, and points of view are funnelled through their experiences growing up as boys and girls, through the prism of their gender. We need to respect this and make it comfortable for men and women to have these spaces.
I mean we could all volunteer for Ukraine, but then again, that is terrifying. Just saw this news report ft. some middle-aged Ukrainian dudes with minimal training being sent to retake a position on the front. Their look of bewilderment/disbelief during the briefing was something to behold.
@@dant3175yeah and they still only send men to the front lines of combat despite society deeming them unfairly privileged.
If I didn't have my job, which is the only thing I look forward to each day, I wouldn't have anything to live for. All my friends I made in high school and college spread out throughout the country so we effectively never see each other unless I make the effort to reach out and plan that we meet, but that's never reciprocated which have left me feeling invisible and unwanted. I know I'm supposed to make an effort to create new connections, but with 3 hours left each day coming back home from work I'm supposed to do groceries, cook, clean and work out - there's simply no free time. So the only real option is hanging out with a friend over discord until I have to go to bed each day. It's a cycle I find difficult to break, but if I whine about it like I just did none will listen or just ridicule me over how good I supposedly have it - life fucking sucks. At my age my parents already had a full life and with time to spare for a social life.
I hear you man.
I wish you the best, bro
Could you give up just one evening to do a class at a night school in something that really interests you? It could make a big difference to your sense of achievement and help with developing a new interest and social life. Batch cook a few meals so you get ahead of cooking to give you some space to relax and go somewhere. Even a comedy club night out might break the monotony. Good luck 🤞
Just pick up the phone ! call and ask what going on!!! It does cost you any thing, except your time !!! Trust me they would love to hear from you !! I've done it !!!!!!!
You got a dog Raven? Best thing I ever did when something similar happened to me was get myself a best friend to hangout with outside of work
Get off TH-cam and go do something. I started hobbies I enjoy again, and it’s been amazing. I even picked up some new ones too.
Sitting and listening to to social media influencers telling you everything is shit all the time isn’t good for your mental health.
Groundbreaking take
@@AlaskanMilitantcame here to say the same- nice to remember that real change comes from doing not listening
To anyone whos struggling, i know you will overcome it.
It's good that someone knows, because I don't see a way out personally.
Thanks bro. All i wanted for my whole life is a loving woman, but every goddamn time the universe takes her away from me. Shit is getting tiresome.
THANKS, BRO! STAY STRONG,PRAY TO GOD AND NEVER GIVE UP!
Bs. Good thoughts don’t get people better. Take action men! It’s the only way things will change. Seeking integrity has free programs S.P.A.A. Is a 12 step group for the addictive videos. You will be fat lonely and depressed if action isn’t taken. This nice person making this nice statement is called a liar and an enabler. Run into any in person meeting you can find asap because addiction is a progressive disease. It will get worse. It doesn’t magically get better. Pills won’t do it, doctors won’t and your loved ones CAN NOT do it for you although the unhealthy ones that need a 12 step program for codependency or will try. This is where agency matters. Man the hell up dudes! Action is the only way things change.
Bs. Good thoughts don’t get people better. Take action men! It’s the only way things will change. Seeking integrity has free programs S.P.A.A. Is a 12 step group for the addicted videos. You will be fat lonely and depressed if action isn’t taken. This nice person making this nice statement is called a liar and an enabler. Run into any in person meeting you can find asap because addiction is a progressive disease. It will get worse.
we will all make it, brothers.
Not statistically
@@zanderstevens7581 true, you won't
As long as you don’t give up you’ll make it.
Zyzz
@@ChrisHops22 you give false hope to the turn around “ you’re right you won’t make it” to someone who points out your statistical inaccuracy did I trigger you?
I'm a 66yo female. First marriage 20 years, widowed when he died suddenly.
Current marriage 20 years and counting. Two sons, 35 and 24.
I was told decades ago that a man needs 3 things.
Something to do (work, hobbies, etc.)
Someone to love.
Something to look forward to.
I'd appreciate someone telling me if that's correct, why it's not, or if you'd add something to it and what that would be.
Men love feeling being needed and being told they’ve done a good job. It can be a simple thing like undoing a tight lid! The one thing that will make a man walk is to make him feel useless or inadequate. Have an argument by all means but never humiliate a man if you want him to stay. And never run him down in front of anyone. Men demand loyalty of those they wish to be around above everything else.
The three things you listed sound about right to me.
@@JM-yd9sm thank you for your comment, and I appreciate your additions to what I was told.
The things you listed just came natural to me, so I consider myself lucky in that regard.
Kind of falls along the line of treating someone as you'd want to be treated.
I chuckled at the removing a right lid part of your comment. I have rheumatoid arthritis, and lids are the bane of my existence. I call my husband my hero for loosening them, and his hands the "jaws of life," because he can open the toughest of those kids. 🙂
Again, thank you for your comment.
I can confirm this. We want meaning in what we do, we want meaningful relationships, and we want to be part of something far greater than ourselves, and something we can look forward to manifest in the future.
Absolutely. We look forward to having a sense of serving, that’s were our purpose is fulfilled. I love doing honeydoo tasks for my wife when I’m not working or doing hobby stuff
The State now provides and protects. The State will never be able to nurture.
The need to be needed is not the same as being needy.
WHY DOESNT ANYONE ASK THE MEN INSTEAD OF MAKING STUFF UP?
Because people might not get answers that comfortably comply with certain narratives.
I assume Reeves is going to continue with his message about masculinity being about giving more than you get back. Once you figure out who's on the other side of that equation - who's supposed to be getting more than they give back - you begin to understand why this is even being discussed at this point.
Lol you mean he is controlled opposition?
I mean he's not entirely wrong, there is a psychologist called Thomas Joiner who talks about perceived burdensomeness, thwarted belongingness, and capacity for suicide as the three prerequisites for someone to commit suicide.
We didn't evolve as islands, we evolved as pack animals, so our biology and psychology is designed to worry about our place in the group.
But I get that nobody wants to be the nice guy sucker everyone takes advantage of.
@@dant3175 a cat chasing it's tail
I don't think Reeves would agree with that characterisation of his argument.
I think there is real wisdom in understanding that giving and providing can be rewarding, satisfying, and give meaning, especially for men. If there's no appreciation given, sure, that's unlikely to give satisfaction, but often appreciation is all that's needed. I give my time and skill to a charity. I get nothing in particular back except the satisfaction of being useful and the thanks of others. They don't even have to give much thanks. So long as I don't feel taken for granted I'm fine
@@simonmackenzie6230That’s a big difference though, the average person would feel good being able to do charity, that’s how charity works. That isn’t the same thing as providing for someone else’s need by any stretch because no one would do so freely endlessly. Most people would charity as long as they could.
@@simonmackenzie6230 I've heard Reeves directly say what I referenced; in fact, I've heard at least one occasion where it was characterized by him as "Real masculinity", so shaming language was added.
It's not just young men my dude. I'm 42 and I find myself asking WTF is this on a daily basis. To be clear I am NOT talking about self harm. I'm just saying it's difficult to see the point of modern life when it's a constant circle j3rk of bullshit from the micro to the macro.
In what era would you prefer living in if you could choose?
@@Mouffon any era was better than now
@@Mouffon nineties. Enough tech to make things interesting but not so much that it's taking over our lives. Can't speak to the political climate then cuz I was a kid😂
@@mmancino1982 it's learning to filter out all the bullshit that is the challenge. Getting sucked into opinionated and divisive non-issues that inflame and get reactions is causing everyone more stress than it needs to.
So many of these social issues online get downright personal for us, but when you actually ask yourself how they are impacting your day-to-day life - they just aren't.
With access to the entire world, sometimes we need to remind ourselves that it's okay to just worry about your immediate sphere and have NO strong opinion on international or even national issues.
@@mmancino1982 That's understandable. Sometimes I wish I was raising my kids in the 70s to 90s, although we do have a great community here and I'm happy with my kids' school. I definitely wouldn't trade today for any era prior to the 50s though. Despite any modern day bs, we are very fortunate to live in modern times.
This is still a conversation about symptoms…….
What do you think the cause is?
My 82 years of life has shown me without a doubt that the worst thing one can tell a man is; you are worthless, un needed and/or unappreciated... and that is mostly what they hear these days. This will eventually be catastrophic for mankind.
The cycle we're in has happened before, and will almost certainly happen again.
There's a lot of truth in what you're saying. No one should feel like they're worthless or unappreciated, but it does seem like that's becoming more common these days, to be honest. It's tough because those feelings already take a toll on people and society as a whole. I think we need to do a better job of valuing each other and showing respect. Those small things can make a huge difference in the long run.
And yet the message of “alpha” culture is that you’re worthless unless you do XYZ and grind for ABC etc. The call is coming from inside the house
He’s exactly right. I had someone that I felt needed me and I needed them. It gives you so much motivation to put up with life.
But they passed away and now sometimes I’ll just sleep all day because nobody cares if I get up or not.
It’s such an empty feeling, knowing if I had a heart attack or something, nobody would even notice until the rent goes unpaid.
Trust me, it can go from being needed and cared about to silence and isolation in a flash.
I’m just happy I had someone at one point. Many don’t even get that. But yes, it’s very depressing. Like being in the bottom of a well, alone.
It’s depressing, lonely, pointless and nearly impossible to get out of….
Hang in there. Get yourself out in the world. Find a new hobby, working out, sign up for a class. Things will come together for you. Sending positivity and prayers my friend.
Even if you just about have the energy to get up and have a shower, it proves there is some life force left in you. Small rays of light in the dark. You can grow this again and become bright enough to light up any room you walk into. Keep going mate, your partner would be proud of you! Share the good things they saw in you with the world. You can do it, and the world needs you to do it.
@@blahblahblue55 Thank you 🙏
@@BertyBogTrot Thanks for the advice 🙏
It's okay to take your time picking up the pieces. Start small, just do something that tells you you're alive each day, however small. Even just making a cup of coffee. Build from there. You still have fight in you!
From what I’ve seen, divorced men with kids get financially ruined by the system.
Prenup
@@AlaskanMilitant In the US, prenups cannot predetermine child custody, child support, or visitation rights.
Most men do not get to have a family now. If they do not get a chance to participate in society then they lose their motivation.
He’s partly correct. Most men don’t feel they can ever have a family, afford a house, have any decent quality of life. I even struggle as high earner - I can’t imagine being in the bottom 50%.
Society has embraced modern feminism, which results in anti-male and anti-masculinity attitudes, and they simply don't care if men are struggling
Lack of manufacturing jobs
Lack of decent role models
When a male role-model DOES appear, he gets attacked (like Jordan Peterson)
Hey Chris, there's been plenty enough talk on the "why". It's time to step it up to "here's what we need to do".
people aren't remotely ready for what needs to be done, so it needs to get far, far worse before any action takes place.
@@bb.buchanan I'd say you're deadwrong. Why? Because it is already being done, both by men and women. However we can not erase in a few years what has been built up for decades. But there is a change occuring.
@@ronyeahwiggie729 What exactly is "already being done?" - shit is pretty bad out there and rapidly declining; I don't see anything other than boots on the street (which is what I was referring to) making the kind of changes necessary to stop this runaway garbage train. Things are still too comfortable, the love of bread and circuses is still more important to the masses than radical change.
@@bb.buchanan From where I am standing I see a change. People are resisting this madness and that only increases. Now i am not big on social media, but if youtube is anything to go by anti-narrative channelks and content is growing fast. On a personal level I encourage kids to question what is being told and taught and they see it themselves too.
Well put
Wow perfect timing for this video
Video idea for Mr. Chris- perspective exercise
How would you feel day to day if you WEREN’T in great shape, clean cut, upgraded, etc
May be fun to get in the headspace of guys who are watching but are stuck in their weaker form of self
Example- when I am out in the world and flowing I come alive, my speechcraft is sharp, and my general sense of being is well
BUT once I look in the mirror at my mild acne scars, my skinny fat build, my unplanned haircut, posture, etc I suddenly feel as though I don’t have the right to move confidently through the world because I am so far from “my best self”
Even with all the tools to do well I put them down (metaphorically) out of shame of who and what I am
Tomorrow I start my break from my adhd med (the big one, alcohol, caffeine, nicotine, “etc”
This video was very well timed (at least in my own egocentric view of what I have to work on hahah)
Keep up the excellent content please, and take time to yourself when needed to recharge your battery (unless it really is true that there is no such thing as overworked just underrested “insert bicep flex emoji” )
This channel is doing for me what Peterson and Harris have done for many others
It truly is part of my journey to finally become who I was always supposed to be
-Dino (31, Male, Philadelphia)
I feel lost I’m 37 and just nothing is absolutely worthy……😢
Sun, nature, part of art or culture you enjoy, watching world history unfolding before your eyes like a best film there is
I never thought about the flexibility in purpose, but you are right. I have noticed a trend in men sticking to one thing and making it the sole purpose. Usually, it is their job.
What’s just as frustrating as not being seen, it’s not being heard.
You can’t throw a rock without hitting a news story about the loneliness epidemic in men and how men feel alienated. You’re being listened to, you just aren’t being handed a solution.
0:03 that transition from arm out to your kneecap looking like a boulder bicep threw me off 😅
Purpose is hard to find.
I lived for 31 years before I found mines.
How’d you find it?
@@Kevin-ts7hf LUCK!!
I was going to the gym one day, and there was a mentorship program asking for men to sign up. I did, and mentored a boy for 3 years.
That turned into a passion, and I currently am in Grad School to become a Student Counselor.
Helping the youth validates my existence!
I really don't like this conversation. I am a man who loves to cooking, and iron my own clothes and has no problem sharing the child rearing duties, because that's what my Dad did for me.
However, because I am 34, only have a bachelor's, make 71k, and a roommate in DC, I am X'd out by many women.
They do not want to share those duties unless you take care of everything else.
BTW I even volunteer at several organizations (including mentoring), and the women say they value that, but can't be with me.
Sir, you are a noble sole that makes civilization better.
This other guy says your noble. I say your doing exactly what you should be, which is taking responsibilty. Any potential partner or friend who doesnt think you are good enough clearly isnt worth your time and is not on the same level of maturity as you are and thats ok not every one is at this stage and willing to or even capable of taking responsibility for anything.
Uhh ok don't like 😳 your nonsense 🙄.. switch podcast 🙄. Lol.
Know this: you're doing it. The X-ing out by many women is a comment on themselves and their own perception / illusion of fulfilment than you. Keep on keeping on!
You sound like a great guy that many women would love. Be patient and keep putting yourself out there. You will find your person.
Becoming a father changes everything.
Men were doing just fine before they were told they needed a purpose.
Again wow!!!
Really looking forward to the full version
I'm struggling too. All the usual life problems, work , relationships, etc.. but I can get up and walk to the gym, have coffee , meet friends...
Men in marriages aren't "allowed" to have his old friends, or hobbies....well at least not allowed to without a wife constantly creating drama "why don't you want to spend time withMEEEEE ? *sobs*'" or "you don't love MEEEE" or accusing him of going out with "the boys" just to go "cruising for chicks/strippers", whatever stereotype she has in her head of what a bunch of guys do. I've seen it, and experienced it, countless times, and the women are just as likely the ones who later are determined to be the serial philanderers. I did marriage once, and several years after the divorce finally got custody of my youngest daughter who was both neglected and physically assaulted by the "mother". My sense of meaning was being a better father than I had, and being a respectable Lt. firefighter to my crew.
Interesting. I haven't experienced this at all in my marriage (going on 15 years).
Really fascinating topic on the variability of life’s meaning across genders. I imagine this plays a big role in the challenges men face maintaining relationships over time. We often prioritize work at the expense of the close relationships that actually bring the most happiness.
I compare myself to my sister, who’s much better at keeping close ties-something I can really learn from.
Beautiful clip!
We were once warriors, now look at us
We got to stop waiting for our purpose to hit us it never will it’s something that must be seek out
Its better being invisible and doing your shit without complaining than taking the shit thrown at you by others all your life in the name of responsibilities etc.
NGL, when i saw the thumbnail, i thought "If my grandmother had wheels, she would've been a bicycle"
We're living in a synthetic world. A natural world would have plenty of problems and struggles for survival. A natural world is harsh but it's an honest one. This synthetic world that we live in is safe but aimless.
A man needs a purpose in life. For most, it's their families. I wish I could have that chance. I've done the work and put myself out there. Turns out I am invisible. As a short guy 5'5 grown man, I understand I am disadvantaged, I am simply not even considered. I understand the female nature, instincts that attract women to taller men. Women don't want me but I'm still a hopeless romantic. I just want somebody to love and love me back. Maybe that's a fantasy. Now I wish I don't have these desires at all and wish to forget women all together, I'm invisible anyways so why torture myself. My purpose is me alone, find purpose, peace and happiness alone.
We see you brother! A good woman will too, carry yourself with pride. You got this mate!
Go asian they're shorter.
Bro there’s plenty of short kings out there. You say you’re a hopeless romantic? Read some romance books and talk to women about them dude. Do the things in the books with them.
Also your women instincts part is nonsense.
If you want failure then just count all the ways someone is something bad and good and then compare them to someone else. Nice job world.
There used to be a fairly obvious "use" for the unique things men had to offer.
Its not so obvious now that technology has supplanted a large number of men in the workforce and relationally.
It's obvious to me in North Carolina right now!
@@Kate-rv6kx what specifically is obvious?
Hurricane relief effort, more than likely. Due respect, come on. Think on it for a second.
Lots of people are here volunteering for disaster relief, but what we need most are people strong and healthy enough to do debris removal and skilled with heavy equipment to fix roads. Not that a woman couldn't do that, but I couldn't beat a man in a debris removal race!
@@Kate-rv6kx
I know you don’t need it, but kudos to you for volunteering.
What makes everyone think people had purpose before now anyway?
I think one of the biggest issues is people keep freaking talking about it. Just do what you need to do and that’s it.
Great idea !!
I’m a Christian. Grew up in a good Christian home with loving parents. From the time I was a little boy going to public school, I encountered subtitle to openly hostile statements against Christianity from teachers, tv movie media depictions, etc. (I remember my second grade teacher saying Christians didn’t really care about science because they’ll just do what their church tells them). My parents response to this was always simple saying Jesus said his followers would be disliked or even hated.
As I aged of course, the hostility became more ugly and open (I had a college professor say Christians should have to register as such and shouldn’t be given certain civil rights like voting, since they’re a bunch of crazies) - to clarify, not of these teachers, classmates were ever directly unkind to me. They were often very kind, just had a lot of hang ups about religion.
I say all this because though my entire life, my faith has given me comfort, and purpose. I’ve been discouraged, stressed, sad, but never nihilistic or purposeless. I know the hostility that religion gets often stems from the frustration that the secular have with religious people being irrational, taking things on faith, or being manipulated by religious systems, (much of these things are undoubtedly true) but I’ve always been surprised that the existential peace and purpose derived from religion seems to be endlessly overlooked as a positive by the secular. Simply put, would we rather convert people to materialists that the potential for accompanying misery and nihilism is worth the cost? I’m not sure it’s a good trade.
Your last sentence sums it up nicely. They want materialists, or better yet, want you paying a subscription.
We KNOW we're needed. We're needed to quite literally run society. All of it. Every aspect. And we DGAF. We're sick of literally keeping society functioning and being attacked and badgered endlessly for it. It's FAR less "Oh poor me I'll just end it." and far more "Fine. I fucking quit. Fuck you."
It's going to be interesting to watch when men walking away hits critical mass and society completely falls apart. TF you think Elon is building robots for? Lol.
What job do you do that is critical to society? (Personally, my job is not needed but it's enjoyable and lucrative).
@@MouffonI don’t think he means specifically we as in he but we as a demographic, which, I think it’s like 90% of infrastructure is done men. IE, most violence is made, that doesn’t mean the mass majority of men are violent.
Now we're getting to the root cause behind society's 'concern' about these issues...
Yea as a single man it is true once a guy gets married they do drop their male single friends. I don't know why the woman disdains their husband having single friends. I guess it comes down to that the man will walk miles for a vertical smile. I have noticed that women will tell their women friends something that should be said to the man directly about. We are married now we can only associate with other married couples. Do women see this as sort of a competition? I will say it's like I am not asking your husband out for a beer or go to a pro game every week.
That's crazy. I never dropped any friends when I got married and neither did my friends. Is this something younger men are really doing? (I'm in my 50s)
It's probably the same reason that some men will tell guys 'don't let your girl go out with her single friends', -insecurity. The relationship status of anyone's friends should be irrelevant, if they're a good friend that's all there is to it.
That being said I do think partners sometimes get used as a kind of 'get out of jail free card' when people actually don't want to go out but won't just say that 😅
@@Mouffon all I can say about that is, it has happened for me. I guess it depends on the person's personality man or woman.
@@tempsoda This maybe a good topic for my next podcast.
@@tempsoda Yea I heard Rich Cooper say that about women who want to go on girl trips. A woman is supposed to be a compliment to your life not add chaos to it or cheat on him. This guy does think he is God's gift for women though.
Cognitive self complexity.....multiple sources of "identity" - meaning (inherent value), purpose (place/sense of value in community) and "power" autonomy.
Where are, (medium growing in) and how deep, are my roots.
I’m a woman and I just want to say that there are lots of women who desire a traditional masculine man. But I live in the south in a small town and have traditional values. If you are in the north or a city, traditional women are hard to come by.
They may want “traditional values” but there’s a loooooonnnnnnggg list of other stuff they REQUIRE .
I’m 70, female. I’ve watched this progression over the past 50 years. I worked full time and made twice the money my husband made. I am staunchly independent and self-sufficient a proud of my accomplishments in a number of arenas. But I have come to two conclusions. 1. Contrary to popular belief, most women would dearly love to be a stay at home mother during the first 15 years or so while child rearing is intense and demanding. The pressure on women from working and managing home-life is incredible and may actually influence the divorce rate. 2. If men would like to address their changing role, the economics need to be addressed. With the cost of housing, cars, etc., can men afford to be the only breadwinner and keep their families in comfort? Most can no longer do so compared to the boomer generation. So focusing on economic policy making is the only way to give women the space to not have to work while childrearing. Finally, men have an absolutely essential role in the life of a woman. It doesn’t look the same as men from the 1940s when the only thing men had to do was to bring home a paycheck. A man’s role is even more important now because he needs to model to his family what being a team player looks like. Model what being a loving man looks like to his children by being involved at a deeper level than our grandfathers were. It’s down to a finesse level now, not just looking over and seeing him parked in his easy chair. It’s a finer, finesse based existence men are struggling with.
Beautifully expressed. And I agree 100%. The problem though, is that such wisdom only comes after a lifetime of observation. In today's world, a lifetime of perspective is sought out, listened to, or enough to make a person of a younger generation fundamentally change. Technology is no longer beneficial in this area. The constant, addictive, onslaught of new noise and information overload, drowns out and dilutes our ability to value actual human value.😢
I agree with all this, but to extend, this finer experience must also be rewarded as well. It can’t be strictly just “men need to learn to show a finer experience” because if the opposite is rewarded, that’s what will be brought instead. Case in point, men have slowed on the versions of dates they do because it was through trial and error found that “better” dates weren’t more successful. IE, kids today wanna be TH-camrs because they see that as successful. What women want men to be has to be shown to be rewarded or it’ll just be another stopped idea like any other version of men.
@@thewolfex1 I agree. It seems like people forget men prefer to be simple, so things like acknowledgement for putting in effort and actually trying to accomplish something goes a long way. Now we don't need this every single day, but I've seen many women agree with one another that they "don't want to have to mommy you". Showing encouragement isn't "mothering" someone, it's being a decent human being, so it really says a lot to us men if you look down upon us for wanting that from time to
time.
@@user-og6hl6lv7p To not even begin to talk in degrees on whether or not what women want seem to be fathers. Which by the way, if both sexes seem to want there opposite gendered parent in partner form, in what world wouldn’t that make perfect sense anyway? Who else would you get your model for what a mother-parent or father-parent should be like in day to day life? Who else would you get a baseline experience of the opposite gender?
Quite making excuses for weakness. Recovering from depression comes from within, not from relationships.
Can’t wait for the full episode! This is classic Modern Wisdom content - insightful and thought provoking, with actionable take aways 👌
I like to listen to these talks and benefit from them but it's a shame the spiritual dynamic to life is rarely discussed. It's good to talk about the emotional and physical needs but to ignore the spiritual will always leave you wanting.
Was looking for the podcast then came here and saw that it’s not uploaded yet lol
As a white heterosexual conservative Catholic man I have been told that I am useless. The magnitude is further increased when you account for the current dating market.
Life is easier when you realize that these other people would never survive if it wasn’t for the world that your people built
You should move somewhere you'll fit in and be appreciated.
Wow, what is more than a trifecta? Ha. I’m in same boat, but not Catholic…. We are the last “identity” that can be discriminated against and ridiculed in polite circles. As a commentator above pointed out, no one wants to hear if you are struggling. Just know brother, you are still needed and contribute to society.
By who?
The male protector and provider model is BIOLOGICALLY constructed, but socially ENFORCED. It won't change, unless our biology changes. And the problem here is fatherlessness. No two ways about it. That's where it starts. And I don't know how many times I've already said this on this channel, but every social problem we're having nowadays is directly caused by this.
Throughout history, in most societies, "becoming a man" was a right pf passage, something you had to participate in and fundamentally achieve something, generally oriented towards society. Becoming a woman meant having your period, purely biological. It has always been understood that being a man is more than getting your first boner. Somehow the importance of that achievement portion has been lost along the way.
its all by design
J D Unwin did an interesting study on the direct correlation between the decline of cultures and their tendency towards sexual freedom. It’s difficult to deny his data from 86 civilizations.
Who defines sexual freedom? A person who came to America on the Mayflower (1620) would have a very different concept of sexual freedom than a founding father in 1776 than a cowboy in 1890 than a sailor in 1944 than a 2nd wave feminist in 1975 than an Incel in 2024.
That books take away is that societies fall apart within 3 generations of an increase in sexual freedom and that’s obviously bunk as the above example shows.
Every man I know over the age of 30 who possesses at least an ounce of pride in his masculinity is clearly dying on the inside if his wife earns more money than he does. It’s clear that he feels unneeded and it’s slowly killing him every day, even if it’s something he would never openly admit.
I’m over 30 and I was in a 6 year relationship with a woman who made more than me. It did not kill me at all, I make 6 figures, but my self worth is not based on how much money I make. Our relationship only got into trouble because she was STILL very financially dependent on me, despite making more than me.
I dated and lived with a woman for 2 years who made more than triple what I made. It never made me feel lesser than, but SHE made me feel lesser than plenty of times. Even though I was actively taking classes, working two jobs, and taking care of the house - it was never enough for her. It was her disdain for me not making more that killed me. Every chance she got, she would dangle the fact that she was the breadwinner over me in some passive-aggressive manner.
I think some guys make the mistake of thinking that all women are looking for a guy to outearn them. Every woman has access to those men. And sometimes that IS what they are looking for. But sometimes it isn't.
45 years old. Been with wife since teens. She has always earned more. I am a codependent, working in between the school run, doing child care, cooking, cleaning etc.
My school run days as nearly over, and I suspect my usage from her will be too.
4 months ago I discovered her behaviours and traits are that of a covert narcissist.
I am thoroughly depressed and my joy in life is restricted to my two boys. Without them, I really have nothing anymore. Stay strong lads. ❤
@@Richatyourzenith I specifically said “wife” because married and unmarried are significantly different types of relationships in terms of the extent of psychological toll I mentioned above.
We're poor and being pushed down
I think the problem lies in the unrealistic expectations of women in dating. "Six foot, six figures", etc. When only the top 10-20% of men are considered to be viable mates by women, what are the other 80-90% supposed to do? I was just looking at my retirement numbers today. If not for having a wife and my youngest son to take care of, I could easily retire tomorrow (age 50) and live comfortably. Now think to a 30 year old man with no prospect of ever having a family. What does he really have to labor for?
Maybe labor for his own self fulfilment to be a good addition to the community around him? Also this echo chamber online of women’s expectations are not a reflection of what the average woman ends up dating in reality.
Far more than 20% of men are in relationships. Women aren't as picky as what's portrayed online.
Are you six foot six figures etc? Are your married friends? Guys you know in relationships? Don’t blame women for a problem men are having.
Women have been told they are needed in the work force because they are another crop of working bees that doubles the work force and keeps wages low. Meanwhile more and more technology develops and consumers are bombarded with products they are convinced they need to buy - the latest, newest gadgets, innovations, beauty products.
Single men become a problem because they don't spend much and they lose the urge to keep working hard, make money, pay taxes, create and provide for family, etc. The other problem becomes that women workers replace men workers, which affect quality and production. It's all about control and manipulation of people, so the real owners can benefit from continuously. They need everyone to be very ambitious, working and spending for the system to work. And if people don't do it, they will event and develop AI and robots to do it soon.
Hello guys. Nobody can stop you working out and getting stronger and healthier. Nobody can stop you educating yourself and getting wiser. Nobody can stop you from enjoying your hobbies and cultivating a talent. But yourself. If you’re lonely - try reconnect with past friends or acquaintances. I’m lucky enough to still be mates with my 5 guys from primary school. And we only meet up nowadays once every couple months. But they’re always there. And it’s worth it. I hope this is more helpful than self righteous condescension. You just gotta do shit.
As we get closer to the End Times and Great Tribulation, the "wrestling" conversations and solution proposals just get interesting and futile at the same time.
This relentless demonisation of ordinary men by feminism is evil.
28 y old male, from affluent mid class family. College educated. Worked decent jobs. Got addicted to Kratom- made stupid finical choices. Now living back at home. At a total point of absence of meaning- yet realizing that the task at hand is really to just take full responsibility and connect with the notion of consciousness, God, what have you. Guard my attention and have more discipline and get back out there. But right now, yo. I ammm a totalllll loser haha. Also gotta drop that narrative. But out here and certainly feeling the total sense of self annihilation
I’m 26, went to college, parents divorced, never dated until I was 24. Married my first girlfriend a month ago, promotion coming in January where I’ll make 6 figs.
I guess my point here is life seems very dull at times. I was going through it from 19-23. But it can change just as quick as anything else. Never stop trying to meet people, chase your dreams, invest in your passions. Oh and get a dog, they cure all wounds man
Life is short and always has a way of working out eventually, just gotta stay mentally tough
Well you’ve seen the decline of fraternalism and fraternal societies, therefore men have lost a large part of their social support networks.
shit I was the thumbnail just when I scrolled by this one
It's more than just not feeling a sense of purpose, or being useful. It's also not being respected or appreciated, being treated poorly or unfairly, and not being taken seriously if one complains about it. It's being outright vilified, ridiculed, and too often ignored.
And for divorced men, it is too often about having that which is most precious to them, that which they were literally bred to protect, their children, taken from them, alienated from them, and having no real recourse against the slanted, heartless system that took them from them in the first place. Being rendered not so much useless, but powerless and humiliated. And finding little to no hope that the situation will change for the better.
Women are directly connected to the Eternal I would say, through mothering. Men don't have that, they need women as an intercession. If you cut that link, men simply loose this and obviously loose hope as well. It's more than purpose, it's basically the lack of grace in religious terms. It's possible to get around it, with communities and so on, but it's not as natural and really not the same. It's kind of dry and not convincing, although for a minority it works. It takes a lot of work to make it this way and usually it is done through actual work. Of course if you take that away, there is nothing left.
Reeves is a bit optimistic, he thinks it's about "challenges" and not wanting to face them. That's completely false, it's more that men are not allowed to have challenges and if they do take some, are considered bad, so you don't get any validation, no community, no women and probably no friends either. It's inculcated very young as well, where taking chances for a man is punished while women doing it are rewarded. So of course people will feel valueless, they were abused all their lives and since they are providers, people that are supposed to care, they will instead internalize and hurt themselves and not allow themselves to be happy. And the adult society will also make sure you don't make it, unless you are considered useful by a woman temporarily, or are nice looking, or a good personality in some ways. But it's extremely precarious and conditional.
So yes, I don't think any society has ever abused their children this way, so it is pretty much game over. There is no turning back and such a society does not deserve to live anyway. The world is much better off without it. Reeves is correct about that part, but he thinks some rats can leave the boat and save themselves. Not really.
Hey Everyone 🤠
Find the parts that interest you:
0:00 - Discussion on young male suicide increase
1:20 - Importance of feeling needed in society
2:34 - Higher suicide rates among divorced men
3:38 - Exploring women's roles in modern society
5:30 - Women's evolving roles in society
6:43 - Men's traditional roles and their changes
8:20 - The importance of fathers in family dynamics
9:30 - Greater male variability in roles
10:44 - Cognitive self-complexity explained
11:54 - Men's identity tied to work
Recap by Bumpups ✏️
The point about dropping male friends after marriage is a bit silly, and self-serving
But women have forgotten about the kids. Daycare, schools, and iPads are raising children nowadays, and the kids are not alright if you look at their mental health.
When did Brock Sampson take over as host?
God's got this🎉❤
1:50 ... Mr. Reeves, there does come a point where "feeling of being unneeded" becomes, "the World is really better of without me." The resolution comes from the realisation that ... that may be today, but there will be more days. So the resolution is found with an understanding that your primary task is to become stronger in Character tomorrow, than you are today. Doing that is a Long Process, but it a doable task ... if you have such will to proceed ... to Marshal Forward.
This world became very complicated... too complicated for most. We better start simplifying things before we lose a lot more men.
No individual is 'needed by the world' and that's a good thing.
I don't relate to anything in this video. If you do you need to change your direction in life.
Funny that he sounds so intelligent while speaking about what's wrong with men now. Then, he mentions that being able to physically defend yourself and fight your own battles is not as important in our modern society. Yet, he fails to consider a link between the two coexisting conditions. Humans never stopped being animals and never will. It's unscientific to believe otherwise. Accepting uncomfortable truths leads to growth in individuals and groups.
I think men can be bad at making friends. Although, some women will insist that their husband/boyfriend drop their friends. She will want to hang out with her friends.
I don’t know why you have this guy on your podcast. He is a known liar, and offers a very dishonest perspective on why many men are struggling . Really wish you would call him out on it
What has he lied about specifically
@@MW-dd8vk is this a serious question ?
He has lied about there being no discrimination against boys in schools from female teachers even though there is a lot of evidence of this. Much of it has been documented by women.
He also claims that the reason men are committing suicide and dropping out of school and work is because they “lack purpose “. This is nonesense. It is because they are being hated and discrimination against. They face false accusations that can ruin their lives, and there is no recourse for this. Check Erin Pizzey’s video on male suicide.( she was the creator of the first domestic violence shelter for women btw)
He never addresses discrimination against men, and he never addresses false accusations. Apparently our suffering has nothing to do with women . But then he claims that women’s suffering has everything to do with “sexism” . If you believe that, you’ll believe anything.
@@JR-hh8jsSo according to you the sole purpose of men’s suffering is women discriminating and hating them? This man is well versed in his claims but you think your conclusion makes has greater validity because? I think it is important to recognise when you are projecting your own personal perception of what is happening in the world, not just broadly state what another states is just lies
@@tshegom03 look up CH Sommers, Erin Pizzey, Janice Fiamengo. All women who are much older than I and have been heavily involved in improving the world for women. All of them say exactly what I just claimed. I suppose they are wrong as well ?
Also, you haven’t disproven my claim about them being discriminated against. You just deny it exists. There is tons of evidence for this.
@@JR-hh8js I looked up the first two. I do actually admire what was stated on the brief biographies of their works I read. But you did not answer my question, you truly believe that the sole suffering of men is because of women discriminating and hating them?
I am not American so I speak about on a global scale I don’t think men having a crisis is because of being discriminated against. The are many attributing factors such as growing up with no male figures, socioeconomic circumstances, no sense of community, and a lack of understanding of what a man’s role in society can look like in a healthy way in 2024. Where I live I have yet to hear of any case where a man/boy has been discriminated against because of his gender/s3x.
I’m a support animal 😅
You have to have a pretty low contentious these days to navigate a high economic status these days. Look just at the pseduo behaviors that are simultaneously are going on in the world, in the name of profit and no morals involved. For example, look how we tie money to humans especially woman. Marketing, sex, materialism, insecurities through body imaging (throw plastic surgery at them), and you can see how alot of men would see this from an outside point, is how broken and flawed everything is.
Woman really want men and want that strength and security that they bring. But if you just keep throwing money at them and push them to be independent, then you are lying to them, because I wouldn't have someone who is so "high and mighty" would be into me, if there wasn't some random pull that you can't explain. You are supposed to see your partner as someone who would would be a good representation of your children, like if my partner were to raise my kids or i were to raise hers, we wouldn't produce some wild offspring that had inclinations of hating their parents, due to their irresponsibility of finding a proper partner. I'm glad I'm born, but I hate the life that I had to endure cause of it, my partner is going to be a reflection of who I am. So either or of us, can raise the children and they will be completely understood, since both parents accept and know their confines and project that to the children. And to boot, since were okay with our proclivities and are less likely to clash, we are therefore a better leader for our children and lead by example, how we would want our children to live.
I'm a child of optics parents when it first started to become a thing. DON'T BE FOOLED.
Your actions are all accounted for, just keep believing you're making a difference while consciously doing so
I watched my Dad get eaten alive financially as a divorced single guy with three kids. He suffered severe depression, and barely pulled himself back up and out of it…in the early to mid-2000s…doing that now takes superhuman resolve and grit because we’re so deeply entrenched in societal pressures and dysfunctionally attached to devices and media that literally carry out a form of warfare on your brain. Our values shift tectonically under our feet all the time, and what we grew up with and saw as true for so many years has now been distorted until we just feel cynical about ourselves and our country instead of clear-headed, knowledgeable, and proud to be here.
Feel like 90% of the clips on this channel are about men's problems, loneliness, body image, feeling lost, lacking purpose and so on and it's honestly getting boring.
FIND your own purpose, build your own story, become your own main character, don't get dragged down by doomer videos like these.
I truly believe that if you don't watch content that drags you down but instead surround yourself with inspiring and uplifting messages, start working on yourself, following your dreams and passions, starting to build on your dream, YOU WILL FIND YOUR PURPOSE.
With that, I will be unsubscribing from this channel.
You just summed up my lost 30's
What a pointless conversation.
I see Richard is wearing the new Balenciaga Boots
😂
First minute of this video i was trying to figure out wtf is going on with his bicep lol. Am i the only one?
there is just nothing to work on. Everything has been done. we're going into a time where only tech bro's thrive. De rest is all useless or automated.
WOW. This is top-notch.
Like a dropping penny. I now understand.
This confirms Jordan Peterson's argument. Men need responsibility.
Men just have to be leaders simple....if they do that they solve 99%of their life