I don’t like to hear black guys say- I only date light skin women. Because if a light skin girl turned around and told him “ I only date light skin men” he would be sooooo offended.
That actually happened in the UK when a mixed race (black/white) women contestant on a popular show stayed she did not date black men. Black men were amazingly offended that their preference did not prefer them 😂😂
My own dark skin brother told me “it’s okay for men to be darker because it makes them more manly but women have to be lighter because it’s different, darker skin on women doesn’t look right” and when I told him “I have dark skin, what do you have to say about that”, he replies “you’re not that dark, you’re more caramel” but I know he also dislikes women of my complexion which is sometimes considered "brown skinned” or from what I’ve heard “safe black” so he only said that because I’m his sister and I’m still too dark for the black man. I’m going to start calling those type of black men racist because I’ve also been told by black men that “black women with natural hair have slave hair”, many express their hate for our dark skin, tell us we should “embrace” our natural hair but in the same breath tell us they hate our hair texture.
Lmao if he was my brother I would have just told him he's dumb and couldn't do 20 pushups right now if he wanted to. Then hit them with strength is never just physical but mental too. But for guys to be like natural hair is slave hair smh beyond dumb. What would guys have to be worrying about hair for anyways they cut theirs off or make dress they have no right to be talking about a woman's hairs 🤷🏽♀️ I'm sorry you heard those things
my brother says i look like harriet tutman i be like "atleast im famous" plus im light skinish and he is too he also said "i dont date people that look like you" then he does and it fails because i tell them he a player
@@CyveIsShy harriet tubman was beautiful, there’s nothing wrong with her i don’t see why he’s complaining. she’s a queen. besides i don’t think “people like you” would give someone with that attitude a chance. just know your a queen❤️
There is some story behind what your brother said actually. I have watched a lot of street with Black people being asked about 'light skin vs darkskin' And interstingly enough most Black men said they preferred Light skin women, meanwhile most Black Women said they preferred Dark skin men.. One of the girls even said 'Light skin men are weak and gay'. The girls usualy said they prefered Dark Skin because they are stronger and more 'manly'. The men usuallt said they prefered Light skin because Dark Skins are too loud, mean,agressive,unapproachable and have an attitude. All these steryotipes were specially perpetuated by Dark Skin men. After this I checked some theories online and apparently Dark Skin is seen as masculine, meanwhile being Light Skin is seen as feminine. It is a weird psychology but people have these ideas in their brains, unfortunately sounds difficult to change it and put us at same position.
My mom use to tell me this poem/quote and it went like this. "When she is told she is too dark, i do not hesitate to offer that the sun loved her so much, it kissed her more than the rest of us". the hatred for darskin has been around to long and i think it stems from jealousy and the need to feel superior
That's so cute. I have heard that so many times. I'm a coincided dark skin women because my Senegalese father told me constantly that I was beautifuly made by him and my mother. My midnight skin is flawless!!
A few years ago, a lady from Africa saw my daughter (who is mixed and fair skinned) and said, "her skin is so beautiful. What cream do you use on her?" I was confused and asked what she meant, and she said, "she's so white. I want to use it on my daughter." I wasn't offended because she wasn't being offensive but I was sad to hear it. Her baby was gorgeous, dark skin and all. I told her "it's her natural skin. It's just her. Pretty like you daughter, don't you think?" And it shocked her, and made me wonder, who told her her black baby wasn't beautiful?
I'm glad you said something. There's no reason why a child should grow up feeling less than because of skin or hair or even eye color. Literally as long as the baby/child is healthy that's all that should ever matter🤷🏽♀️ I mean life isn't easy regardless but whatever that kid is going to be they will get there and that's what's important. I don't get why mother's so willingly shame their kids for nothing smh.
@@jeanetteh.8393 You can not expect much from a traumatized mother. People pass on their trauma's to their children. The mom, was probably made to feel ugly about her own dark skin and she is trying to prevent that fate for her own child. If you look at it from a compassionate stand point, you will realize the mother actually loves her baby and is trying to prevent her baby from experiencing the pain of colorism, which the child will inevitably experience from the world. We can all try to pretend the mother is solely responsible for the perpetuation of colorism in the Childs life or that the kind words of some random stranger who has a mixed child will bring enlightenment to the mother... but we all know that is BS. All black people need to heal, including those who pretend not to be colorist. Period
I'd get mad at her for being like that towards her child. There's a saying, if you don't respect yourself, then why others should :/ I'd scold her for being prejudice/racist/judgmental or w/e it is towards her own child because of her skin tone, like what Oo. That's unacceptable.
I went to a hairdresser who was also light skinned and she asked my mother if I was ‘half-cast’ 🗿. Mind you my parents are both black, it’s just my mom is much lighter and my dad is dark skinned 😅
I’m at the lighter end of the spectrum, and I will never forget this one event that happened in 2015. I had gone to the Bahamas for 2 weeks, and of course I came back several shades darker. The day that I went back to work, my coworker (a dark skinned man) said something along the lines of “don’t go outside too much. You’re going to ruin your pretty light skin.” I am still shocked. Like does he hate himself? And why is getting darker ruining my skin? If anything I had a healthier glow.
That’s something that’s very common amongst black men. It’s come to a point now where black men are the biggest group that perpetuate colorism towards black women. They don’t include themselves in that belief as they basically view dark skin as ugly on their women counterparts only. They hide this under “preference” when in reality, how are you different to a racist if you judge a person based on their complexion? It’s laughable really. Just look at the rap, Hollywood and sports industries. Majority of couples are a darkskin men with light skin or biracial/multiracial women.
@@TheMariadee1 Yeah it’s true. You rarely see these celebrities with darker skinned women. I feel like having beliefs like this about women is a slap in the face to their mothers and sisters. Hopefully more and more darker skinned women will be recognized as beautiful by the media. It seems like that’s the only way to change people’s perceptions of beauty.
OMG when you talked about Mexico I was like: "YES FINALLY!" When I tell my friends (non mexican) about how racist the media is in México everybody seems not to take it seriously. But I know, I watched all the lightening hair/skin treatments ads during my growing years. I watched only extremely skinny, white people behind the screen. And then when I happened to get together with a blond/white person I watched in pain how my whole family and some friends were so thrilled for me to have "blond children" (which by the way LOL they look more than me than anything). To this day the comments of people being sorry for my children not to have inherited my husband's blue eyes or golden hair, make me so sick. And I wished there was more awareness of the topic of colorism in Mexico. EXCELLENT VIDEO!
My light-skinned Spanish teacher in high school basically outright talked about this with no self awareness whatsoever. And my naive white American ass did not question it whatsoever. This was like 18 years ago, so I don't remember the details but something like how having more Spanish blood is considered better in Mexico (or something like that), and then he, with a lot of pride in his voice, said how much it applied to him (or something, forgive me if I have the cultural details wrong.) I just think back in my head about it all the time - because I remember the almost smug pride in his voice basically praising his light skin - and I never thought twice about it.
Ooooo yes! The caste system the Spanish imposed on us was just organized bureaucratic colorism. But as a chicana/chicane, I do identify proudly as mestizo cause if I’m gonna be put into a racial/color category it’s at least gonna be the one from the colonizers I’m descended from and not the mess of the USA. Note: my mom is brown and when he lived in Mexico my dad was white (he’s brown now cause he spent more time in the sun living in MN and now has that melanin activated) and besides disliking that my mom was Catholic my dad’s family (aka cousins and aunt) didn’t like that she was so brown. Her dad was so dark brown he would be thought of as black, but yeah we also have an ancestor or few that were enslaved Black folks on my mom’s side of the family. And no I don’t speak often with that part of my dad’s family, also cause they’re homophobic and I’m queer af. 😂
@@blessedtobealive I HIGHLY doubt he was given the entire concept of the commercial. He probably was told about his portion, he acted it out, got paid and went home.
I read a quote from the Ewe people and it said, "until the lions have their own historians, the history of the hunt will always glorify the hunter." If we dont tell our own stories, we will only see what they want to show.
@@cometmoon4485 I dont know much about them but wikipedia says that they are primarily along the coastal regions of West Africa. Covering Ghana (the largest population), Togo (second largest population), southern parts of Benin and Nigeria.
so true... and we must TELL our stories, because they ARE out there, we must pay attention to those who VOICE them, such as this young lady on this TH-cam video...
Goodness, and the texture discrimination as well. It is truly sickening the way so many African countries have been brainwashed to thinking that one must have Eurocentric features. So many people lighten their skin, relax their hair, and even wear contacts. It is so sad!
when I was little, I used to think "dark skinned women look gorgeous, I wish I looked like them". now I learned to appreciate my white skin more. ofc I still think dark skinned women are beautiful, I love their naturally coily hair ❤️ we are all pretty, love you~
Beautiful and brilliant!!! I can’t wait to see more of her work, And it’s amazing that it’s very dip diving on serious issues/subject , that is important to know but it’s are very complex and not so easy to digest, same are triggering or new point of view for me , but she is incredible full with knowledge and so interesting I learning so much I can’t even explain how much I appreciate her work. so yes beautiful and brilliant person 💕( I hope I don’t have to much problem in my grammar, my English is not the best😬 so I’m sorry if the comment is not so clear )
Giiirl... I feel like being black, being of a darker skin tone is just a lifelong freakin social experiment we've never asked for lol, very eye opening, once you're able to shut down the self hating voices in your head 😳 To my black sisters out there, my dark skin girls, black folks YOU.ARE.WORTHY, YOU.ARE.BEAUTIFUL ❤️
Representation is so important and the fact that the black community is still fighting this fight is frustrating to say the least. When it comes to colorism, I truly believe that the black community isn't doing enough. Dark skin women are divine and the world can't handle it. 👑
yeah and everyone accepts the ish that mixed =black. like naaaawwww. And the majority of us black people are represented as light to white skinned when we mainly brown to darkskinned
@@blackdragonnation5579 poor thing. That’s how self hatred works, they project it onto others outside of them selves to try to distract from their own self hatred.
I just want to add usually when darkskin black women are praised they are usually all oiled up with an hourglass figure and are either nude or wearing revealing things (bikinis, lingerie, crop tops, etc) and while im not one i dont think that type of praise helps the cause in my opinion
Darker skinned Black women have to look like supermodels, goddesses or video vixens to be noticed. Corrective promotion is needed, we need the awkward, sweet girl next doors to be shown because we EXIST!!! We are multidimensional like everyone else.
There was a video I saw on IG where a dark skin black women mentioned that men will except the most basic women from any other race but when it comes to BW (especially darker skinned ones IMO) they have to look like an Instagram baddie to be considered desirable. As a dark skinned BW you have to be a solid 10 to be considered anywhere as beautiful as a 5-6 of other races. At least as far as society is concerned
As a white girl with really bad acne growing up I was really jealous of dark skinned girls because their skin was so even and clean and you didnt see any redness from acne or rosacea. I hated my pale skin because every spot and splotch could be seen from a MILE away. Now I've learned to love my skin but I still think girls with dark skin are some of the most beautiful humans I've ever seen!
I am a light-skinned bi-racial girl from Europe, in Nigeria, I am called names like: white girl' but now I am in the Philippines for a couple of years, and here I am considered as a dark-skinned girl......learned a lot from these experiences....
As a mexican: Yes, telenovelas represent only wealthy people, people with dark skin rarely if ever get starring roles, they're usually the humble friend or the servants... they even get actors from other countries, like William Levy who is a blonde cuban, instead of giving those roles to mexicans. it's fucked up.
Happens here in India too, which is weird because 90percent of us are dark skinned and tv and movies pretend as if only the poor people are dark skinned
so much elitism ugh and white ppl are already better off bc they get more opportunities and tend to earn more money than dark ppl. it's like the media wants to keep the racist class hierarchy and not give opportunities to non white ppl. this has been going on for centuries like aren't we tired??
Yeah people are starting realize that the hispanic culture has just as much if not more colorism going on than the black community. The hispanic motto is "better the race"...which is accomplished through procreating with lighter and whiter.
you're apart of colorism but NOT a huge part of the convo. black people are the huge part of the convo and then comes asian and indian people. i'm hispanic, american and black and i know the difference.
I’m so glad you mentioned colorism on a global level! It’s terrible in Asian culture sometimes. I am half Chinese and half Cambodian, and when I was younger I was always rocked a much deeper tan than what I have now that I’m older and I was a lot more exposed to Cambodian culture, which is almost unfortunately nonexistent in my life anymore. I was always told by my grandparents and aunts, even my mom, who are on my Chinese side, consistently that I was “too dark” and as I got lighter as I approached my age now, my grandma has started telling me I am “prettier” and it’s always disgusted me and honestly just hurt lol. And it always bothered me that I was never able to truly embrace the southeast Asian in me because it is not really “popular”. When considering Asians its always Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc and no one ever knows about Cambodians, Laotians, Thai, etc. Idk it was always weird to me.
As a filo i've witnessed this... i was so privileged compared to my other classmates bc they were shades darker than me... they would even ask me if i used glutathione or what my tips for lighter skin were...
Filipino here. Yeah, colorism is really prevalent here, too. There were people I've met who literally said to me that darker skin is "ugly". The amount of demand of skin whitening products is rampant and overwhelming. The amount of people who are willing to inject glutathione to their bodies just to make them look white are high as if having darker skin is a some sort of disease that had to be treated. The amount of people stigmatizing darker skin people is terrifying. There are literally people on social media getting some clout or popularity just because their lighter or having eurocentric features. And some of them had showbiz careers even though they were untalented. It is disgusting
Where I grew up (southern California) I was mostly used to dark-skinned Asians. Most of the people I knew were of Cambodian, Laotian, Filipino, or Vietnamese ancestry.
I actually think Southeast Asians are the hottest... I will admit to having a thing for Thai guys... however I've noticed that when you see pictures of them online it's mostly lighter skinned people... really annoying.
As a black man let me apologize for all the dumb ass dudes you've had the misfortune to run across. Let me also say, your dark skin is absolutely beautiful.
Frankly, As a French Black woman from the West Indies, I really have felt what you describe. On the one hand, I mostly didn't feel desirable as a teenager growing up in a predominantly white environment and I came to understand through various remarks that is was mostly because Black women were not seen as potential partners at the time, even by my friends. And on the other hand, I recently had the displeasure to hear a guy that I was interested in tell me that his fantasy was to bang a Black woman. I don't think I have ever felt so sullied and commodified in my life. To this day, I don't really know why I feel so disgusted by racial fetishism.
I don’t at all want to tell you how you’re feeling but for me, hating being fetishized boils down to wanting to be seen as a whole person. I love being a black woman but it’s not all I am. Stay strong sis 💕
@@KhadijaMbowe You're definitely right about that. I felt profoundly dehumanized. When I told him, he told me that I should have felt flattered. A real winner, this one! Thank you :)
@@KhadijaMbowe could do a video on Afrocentrism theory and black people being made from stardust. I think that’s a very uplifting and lovely video. Also Ethiopian beauty.
@@estelleg.7922 I‘m sorry that you had to go through such an experience and if it‘s any consolation (it’s probably not): Just be glad you found out before you wasted yourself on such an idiot.
For a Punjabi (North Indian) woman, my mom is darkskinned. She has like a golden medium brown complexion. She was called "darky" by her own grandmother and was constantly told she 'looked like a boy' and was 'ugly.' Even now, I can see how that affected her. She constantly uses makeup shades lighter than her own and that don't fit her complexion. She would use products that would be around my skin tone, and I'm light skinned. I myself got lighter as I got older and I could see the difference in the way my white grandma would treat me. My brother was blonde with light skin and hazel eyes when he was a toddler and I would see all the people complimenting his complexion and that really hurt me when I was little.
That goes both ways. I'm as light as it can get, and just recently i see more brands that carry my shade. For the looongest time i had no foundation...
@@mrswieauchimmer2983 I’m the same way. I think Kat Von D was the first shade pale enough for me (ofc the lightest one she offered) but like I’m not the palest in fenty! (I think I’m like 3rd or 4th). I just always had to wear darker foundation and then for a while I just mixed it with some white stage paint I had to lighten it
Same goes for me as a totally white and pale person. If not for Korean brands I couldn’t even find a bb cream for me. And as a super fair westerner I always got teased for looking sick and unhealthy, even my grandmother forced me to sunbathing. I do have so many sun damages now due to this absurd obsession over skin complexion.
Honestly it's extremely hard for me as a mixed person to find shades that fit me correctly because most of the medium shades are like "white girl tan" very rarely do I find a shade that has the right undertones for my complexion. I don't even bother with makeup anymore
11:02 A lot of black men, specifically on the dark side, project their feeling about dark skin onto darker-skinned black women Since, as men, they feel like they aren't allowed to express their emotions, feeling, or discomfort with jokes that their peers bully them with. Jokes about how their skin color is deemed as bad or undesirable, or a laughing manner. These jokes and micro-aggressions are internalized because they aren't addressed and it turns into resentment. So when they see darker skin black women thriving against all odds. When they see black women have the courage to express frustration and call out these same "jokes" as unacceptable. When they see darker skin women doing the emotional hard work to love themselves, they (Darkskin men) project and take their frustration out on them. It all comes down to self-hate.
Khadija is beautiful, brilliant, gut-bustingly funny, captivating, and insightful. Oh. And her skin literally GLOWS because she's a fucking angel. Thank you for sharing with all of us!! Did I mention that every time you sing or laugh I instantly feel a bit better about being born??
I am an Indian brown girl. And colorism is deep rooted here in India. I used to watch fairness cream advertisement and wanted to have that fair skin as they display it as the best thing you can ever have. I spend all my teenage years trying things to get fair skin. Beauty industry in my country made me believe that i was ugly because of my color. Anyway I love my skin now and do not care of what advertisements say(they still show the same thing). Just love who you are.
I know it’s a totally different culture but I never understood why people want such fair skin all the time. I have very fair skin (I’m half European and half American) and most of the time people comment on it negatively. I’ve come to love my skin color but I just hate how people are always picky about skin color and stuff, it’s weird to me.
I will be honest. As a light skinned woman, I never considered colorism that heavily. I guess I just never realized how bad an issue it is because I never experienced it, so I didn’t realize how prevalent and ingrained it is in society.
@Hybrid Vigour What do you mean by "this abusive relationship?" Not saying there is or isn't one. I'm just confused and don't know what you're talking about, lol. 😅
As an Indian Person from Malaysia this happens as well. When i was a little girl i was not only commented about my skin by others but it was within my indian community and worse still my relatives. It affected my confidence and i actually used to wish if i were fairer i would have less problems, i would be loved. I have had to learn to overcome this. Thanks young aunties like you! im learning self acceptance and most importantly self love. THANK YOU.
Colourism is pretty normal in latino culture. I remember my own sister calling me “negra” (it’s not a direct translation of the N word, it means black but it is sometimes used in a “friendly manner” I don’t agree with that but yeah) as if it was some sort of insult just because I have darker hair. I’m half Italian and half Spaniard, I’m pale with dark eyes and dark hair but she would consider me “inferior” due to not having blonde hair . I also remember this guy (who i used to have a crush on EWWW) who told me not to worry about what my sister said cuz if I were “negra” he wouldn’t even talk to me. When that stupid green-eyes blonde said that I stopped liking him immediately. I mean I should have stop liking him earlier cuz he would call me “autistic” as if that was an insult (I’m not autistic but he though it was fine to call me that just people I’m not too social. It boils my blood how he thinks being autistic can be a trait to make fun of... tf)
Hey, i'm also from latin america and I'm also white with european descent and I have similar experiences: I used to have very blonde hair when I was little, very platinum. But over the years and because of the sun it got darker and now I have a light brown color, and all the people who knew me when I was a little girl say that they are sorry that this happened and it makes me feel very uncomfortable and insecure. They also say that I am very lucky because my parents have brown eyes but I have the green eyes of my grandfather, and the truth is that I do not know how to react to that... What country are you from? I am from Argentina, and here they teach us from childhood that we all have European descent, but then I realized that in many parts of the country this is not true. There are many people who have indigenous descent or mixed but they are very underrepresented. It is good that we are proud of all the European immigration that we had years ago, but I do not like that they do that by being racist and despising others.
Kids can be so merciless..being the only black girl in the grade in elementary school was one thing, but to be the only DARK skin black girl was another type of hell. Thank you for sharing this, and for breaking down colorism so well!
Growing up darkskin was so hard especially for women. I used to feel anxious the second skintone was brought up in school even when I was quiet people would go out they way to insult me. Im glad you were able to gain confidence in yourself
I feel like as a man being dark skin was not so bad. I see lighter skinned men in my area getting less respect because they are seen as less masculine or gay
@@kaisolomon5187 Society says light=feminine and dark=masculine. That’s why dark skinned black men don’t face as much ridicule for their skin color and light skinned women don’t face as much ridicule.
Khadija your intellectual conversations, your way with humor, your incredible personality is both humbling and comforting at the same time... like a big sister... I adore your voice and want to thank u for all the time you put into your channel. Also, thanks for sharing personal experiences.
I'm Nigerian and colourism is soo prevalent there. There have all kinds of compliments for lighter skin. "Yellow like paw paw, sweet like sugar". I hated my shade when I was younger especially because kid my age, just as smart as me were treated better or nicer just because they were fair. I observed this hierarchy especially in church among the women. "Darkness" was closely associated to being mean-spirited, jealous and facetious. While being fair implied the woman was kinder, gentle and more feminine.
@Exotic Samba They turned the biblical angel into the “typical” angel and since white skin is what they’re used to have a liking to, they’ll make the angel white. But of course not everyone is Christian and not every racist is white. I’m pretty sure racism came from fear and paranoia but people just decided to take things way further than was necessary. When meeting darker skinned people, they were probably met with hostility, both sides had never seen each other. I think it also had to do with the type of culture colonists had (I don’t know anything about any culture hundreds of years ago). I doubt the people who trading slaves to colonists thought of enslaving literally everyone of the colonists’ people. I don’t want to say “Although the slave traders knew their technology was less advanced than the colonists” because I don’t know that for sure and even if that were true, we’ve seen many of their tribes fight with them and win.
@Exotic Samba I’m just gonna reply to one part. As you said “…nobody is born hating dark skin…” Someone wouldn’t just become full on racist, there has to be a reason. But whatever the reason, you’re correct. They created false narratives to justify what they did.
I am Nigerian too but I was born and grew up in Europe. I did take trips to the country growing up. Nigerians are at most all on the darker spectrum. So if you grow up with people who look exactly like you shade wise you won't suffer from colourism. I am not saying colourism isn't there just saying that because everyone is dark there people at the end really don't care how dark you are. Those were my experiences. It also depends a lot on region and tribe of course. Igbos are relatively fairer than other southern Nigerians so I feel like colourism is more prevalent there than amongst other tribes. Colourism isn't as heavy compared to India, or Caribbeans or the US where colourism is connected to slavery and classicism in countries in Asia. Nigerian colourism is more connected to American and European influences in Nollywood movies, in fact, many actresses bleach a lot and that will have an influence on people who are watching those movies. They want to be more "Western" like. As Nigeria develops I am afraid colourism will sadly increase amongst Nigerians and we'll all become like Indians where dark skin is seen as poor and light skin as rich and privileged. Africans are eager to achieve the latter status.
Colorism in Mexico is huge, when I was little my mom used to put creams and lotions on my sister and me because she wanted us to be lighter (my mom's skin is lighter than ours). We didn't noticed it until we were teenagers and told her to stop. She excused herself saying that it was because we have freckles and wanted us to have even skin. Ammm she never ask if I liked my freckles hahaha which I do. I don't blame her, her family tends to be of the belief that lighter skin is prettier (most of them are light skin mexican)
Yes you are right is a huge problem, and god forgive if you happen to be indigenous they treated so bad, I’m sorry that happened to you, I constantly see my dark skinned friends be insecure and complain about the skin tone ☹️
My mum did that too. She said freckles are ugly and my face would look dirty. so i hated my freckles like forever 😅 Good that you stood up for yourself in your teenage years 👍
11:58 I literally gasped at this picture...it's stunning. I come from India so we have this goddess named "Kali" she is dark skinned like the night sky and she is like this fearsome warrior goddess and I couldn't help but think of her when I saw it. Absolutely gorgeous
The first video I ever saw on this channel my jaw literally dropped because I could not believe how gorgeous this girl is! I haven't painted in a long time because of crazy bad depression and anxiety, yet this channel has inspired me to create again. I typically don't like putting such emphasis on physical appearance because exterior beauty is shallow and fleeting, but this lady is on a whole other level. Oh, and fuck colorism. All shades of skin are beautiful. All humans are beautiful. Period.
She literally just explained the disdain.... Your comments are definitely coming from a good place but saying fuck colorism or you don't understand doesn't address the issue.
@Audenim Oshea I don't think that it is respect. Sometimes it feels like they have to date a white woman, or they they see white women as a trophy. Both stupid reasons for dating.
They end up not even treating the light skinned women right. If you can insult a woman you can take that same energy to insult another. No one talks about how these dark skinned guys end up still treating the light skinned badly.
I met a man from a dating site. I took my profile picture with good lighting. My intention was to highlight my real looks and not to be fake. It turns out that he thought that I was light-skinned. When we met in person, he was instantly unattracted to me. He even left me standing in my front yard to run after my light-skinned neighbor. She did the right thing, she walked off and ignored him. He was from Ghana and darker than I am but I was not light enough. Light-skinned and white men are more attracted to me than brown or darker-skinned men.
As dark skinned people, we should be able to talk about colorism without being gaslighted, but we should also talk about colorism without tearing down mixed people or disregarding their struggles. We should not cancel and withdraw support from successful mixed actresses as long as they are not contributing to the systemic problem (ie Zoe Zaldana, nina simone) remembering that civil rights icons like Katherine Johnson and Rosa Parks were lightskinned and also helped to pave the way, and that lightskinned people did not create the system. We should not automatically see a lightskinned person having success and judge them, otherwise we are just causing more "us vs them". Rather than tear down Lightskinned people, we should ALL try to lift up dark skinned content and creators. Lightskinned people should also do their share to make sure they are not fueling the problem. Examine the way you are raising your light skinned sons and daughters. and correct them if you see them putting down dark skinned peers. Monitor what YOU say, bc thats how children learn. Make sure you're not supporting dark skinned stereotypes, and be on guard about gaslighting dark skinned people who speak about the problem. Stay in your lane and listen openly to people who speak about struggles that you know nothing about. I hope more channels/videos like this pop up and alter the algorithm so those who are not dark skinned can educate themselves and help to fix the system instead of tearing down specific individuals.
Rosa parks didn’t help pave the way. Another girl before her stood up to racism like her (which I think is how Rosa was inspired) but because that girl was dark skinned her story wasn’t as broadcasted and Rosa’s was. Not tryna say you didn’t make any points...but...
Zendaya is the only biracial actress who talks about colorism. She's even stated she doesn't go after roles specifically marketed to her because she said, "She's the acceptable version of a black woman". Zendaya is aware and admits it others aren't willing to sacrifice something for a dark skinned woman.
@@Fuzzy_Slippers111 Activists used Rosa Parks to persuade more people to the cause because she was already a well respected person in her community. The original woman, Claudette Colvin, didn't have the "good hair", along with being darker skinned, but most importantly, *had a child out of wedlock.* There was no way in hell she was going to gain influence during such a sexist and puritanical era. Rosa Parks did help pave the way. Soft martyrs are incredibly helpful for movements such as these-- it forces white people to question their own prejudices and justifications for bs policies. To turn a "Oh a woman was arrested? What for? Oh, a _black_ woman violated bus policy. That's what she gets for being one of those uneducated, whorish thug-- wait she didn't do anything? She just sat there?" to, "...So why do we have these policies in place when violence and crime have nothing to do with them?" Downplaying her contribution during such a volatile time is just ridiculous.
One time I was talking to this black man and during our whole conversation he was bashing dark skin women saying that they were too “loud” and “ghetto.” He said that he preferred light skin women because he wants light skin babies. He then proceeded to tell me that I should straighten my hair because he didn’t like it curly. Let’s just say last was our first and last convo. Scenarios like that are just the result of deeply rooted colorism but they describe it as their “preference.” *Btw I loved this video and you are my new favorite channel🥰
What men seem to forget is that their babies can still come out black passing hell even darker than them even if the kid is mixed it still happens.they annoy me with this “I don’t want to have black babies” when more than likely it can happen because they are black themselves lol
There's the issue of mixed- baby fetish. I feel like in my country (Kenya), people marry white people just for the sake of having light- skinned children. It's so annoying how mixed race and light skin babies are considered cute, while babies with dark skin are disregarded. Its not that mixed babies aren't cute (of course they are), but the complete disregard of dark skinned babies being cute too (and I do find them to be really cute) is so hypocritical and says a lot about black self-hatred. Another issue- black men not appreciating dark skinned women. But some white men (either due to fetishization of dark skin or genuine love) marrying women of darker skin tones. Honestly, most dark skin women get more compliments from white men than black men. The end result is these dark women being called gold diggers (because white people have higher status here) for marrying a white male (who are usually older). While many issues are intertwined in colorism, there's a lot of double standard.
I am not black (Afghan) but omg since I was little I LOVED black baby’s. Honestly I think they are even the most cutest baby’s (as you well said of course all baby’s) but really, for me personally blacks are sooooo cute ❤️
Hello there someone from Kenya. Well you got that right. And as part of the light community ( my skin is as light as they come) its often confusing to people when i say i dont have white blood. Its as if i must have it to fulfill the preconceived notion. Now im not complaining. The light skin privilege surely comes with perks. But just like masculinity it is constricting. Light skin shouldnt be smart, light skin is like a ping pong. She has no specific place to belong because she aint white enough or black enough. Light skin is expected by the black people who hold a grudge for the privileges she gets, to pay for a system of overt opression she didnt create. It is complicated and when you fight against the norm youre seen as not genuine enough because what could you be complaining about? You're light. A bright future lies ahead of you.
Your skin is literally rich, like the tone, consistency, and color….just buttery richness. Coming to terms with my darkness is an uphill battle because I feel as if I’m just dark - no butter, no smooth consistency, nothing. Sad Girl Moment.
God makes no mistakes. I hope you discover that being you, the color that you are is what you're supposed to be and you will be loved for that if you embrace it. And to be honest, many people want what they don't have, curly hair girls want straight and I always wanted darker skin, even use to lay in the sun to tan. But I'm finally accepting my brownness, wide nostrils, and even my gap in my teeth because it's me and I love myself. I hope you will try to love yourself.
I had a friend from Kenya who was very dark-skin. Some of my white friends said to me one day. When they saw her holding my son who was lightskin. I didn't realize how Black your friend Kadijah was until I saw her holding your son. I told them please don't ever say that again.
What I do not understand is how is that offensive. People like you make it seem as if it is bad to be dark skinned. It's like when you're with a child and that child says, oh look mom that lady is misses one leg and you immediately say stop it, don't say that, it's rude. 🗣Dark skin is not a handicap, people mention exceptional features all the time period. I think in the black community we have to start normalizing mentioning shades without being defensive or uncomfortable. Let us start to make it just a color and the rest will follow. I feel like the way we are going about it now is kinda fake. We act as if being dark skin is some horrible thing we should collectively avoid to mention in daily life. Unless someone is rude and uses foul language there is literally nothing to be defensive about.
I’m a darker Hispanic and I totally resonate with this! In most tv and music there’s lighter people opposed to darker ones. I feel most people don’t recognize how global this problem really is. Thanks for getting into all of this! Great vid!
@Shea Holland lmao so defensive there was no accusation at all. It was just an observation she was making as a "darker Hispanic." It's so blatant that the industry has a certain look they want to keep that anyone of different back grounds can see. I'm sure you can agree.. but she wasn't blaming anyone
@Shea Holland lol I bet... But not this comment specifically. I blame the industry I'm not big on celebrities but even the white celebrities look alike they all have the same facial features the same hair styles it's a look they're going for but it's not at all realistic or fair, half of the famous people don't even deserve the fame. 🤷🏽♀️
@Shea Holland I'm not complaining about shades. I'm not really complaining about anything is what I was trying to tell you I don't like celebrities to begin with 🤷🏽♀️
Colourism is a worldwide epidemic. I'm not Black, I'm Asian, so I'm glad to hear your perspective on this! On my end, I grew up surrounded by skin whiteners and ads that equated light skin with being rich and dark skin being equated with being poor. There was a horrifically racist blackface Filipino TV series called "Nita" (if you google it you'll find the full title, which is, uh, worse) in 2011. It hasn't really gotten better imho
I've heard about the colorism in the asian community too. the weird thing is, in real life we don't see many dark skinned asian. I wonder where they're hiding lol. I only see the Chinese/white asians. I grew up around Vietnamese people, but I haven't seen any of them since I left my home city in California.
When I was in middle school we had a new student from Inida. Her mother became friends with mine and I remember her mother constantly going on and on about how beautiful I was because I was so pale. I could see how it made her daughter feel. And she brought some of that bleach for your skin to school to show me once. Her mother had bought it for her. I had no idea at the time that girls with dark skin went through this and it was so incredibly sad. I'm so proud to say she overcame alot of this and embraced her beautiful skin tone. She was Ms. Washington at one point and I love seeing how great she is doing.
I can’t believe that head chef said that omg that is so fucking disgusting. A lot of black men have deep DEEP colorism issues and refuse to acknowledge them and constantly project them and put black women in uncomfortable and uneasy positions. I’m so happy your video popped up on my homepage today you’re such a beautiful and brilliant woman
By Popular Demand. The sad part about it is that a lot of these black men will dismiss colorism and pass it off as just being a preference for light skin women so they can continue perpetuating and justifying hatred towards black women with dark skin or brown skin
You really said a word! One of the first things I do when talking to a man is root out any colorist tendencies smh. Can you imagine if you have children with a colorist man especially daughters?!?! The trauma chile...
i really love how people are now talking about this. im filipino and i HATED the color of my skin as i was growing up bc people treated the fair skinned kids differently and obviously preferred the more fair skinned chinese-filipinos or the fil-ams (filipino-american--or basically anyone who was half filipino or half western). it was just only recent like a few years back that i finally accepted that i was beautiful and filipinos should be proud of being brown and not aim to be fair-skinned
@@bunnywavyxx9524 in EVERY race this is an issue, it just being black period issue also so it can be worse at time but POC around the world suffer from this
I live in an asian majority country. And once I saw my female black neighbour being harassed by a local. He was drunk and was following her, making indecent propositions. I didn't know what to do to help, I was too young back then. My neighbor laughed it off and went about her day, nothing bad came out of this story, but it's gross nonetheless, it's both dehumanizing a woman and fetishizing her because of appearance.
Colorism is very prevalent in Senegal. Most of the women in their TV Dramas or news casters are light skin while most of the men are dark skin. It's annoying to watch how much light skinnedness is pushed into your face with every commercial, program etc. And then they wonder why bleaching is still very common😑😒
I definitely notice that on TV men are more likely to be dark skinned and women (especially if they're meant to be a desirable mate) are light skinned/bi-racial. The erasure is real.
It's crazy that basically, it's saying that if you are a man it's okay if you are dark skin (and even have kinky hair), but for women that's unacceptable and we need someone who can match that feminine image (lighter skin, etc). Maybe I'm reading too much into it but that's what I noticed
@@KhadijaMbowe I see this in so many movies and shows. I love the movie The Photograph with Issa Rae because it depicts black love with both people of similar skin tones.
Absolutely, even in my country in Africa the most desirable women tv personalities are light skinned and skin bleaching is common place. There is also benefits to getting hired, securing better marriage prospects etc. I am a lighter skin African also due to the practice of "marrying lighter" which encourages dark skinned men to seek light or very light skin women to have children that are lighter than them. This is an open secret and many times talked about bluntly. Many young African men will state flat out that they will not marry dark skinned women in order to have lighter skinned children. This dark skinned black men hating on dark skinned women phenomenon is global. 😑
Wow, my husband being from Mexico, I was already aware of colorism, but watching this video both opened my eyes even further and broke my heart. I'm so sorry to hear about what you've had to go through as a child. And what millions have to go through as kids. It's plain horrible...
I just discovered this channel. Amazing content. I’m from Mexico and colorism is very alive here. At design school we were taught that when doing adds for commercials we should use white skin instead of brown cause people prefer it and will buy the product more even tho mexico has a huuuuge number of brown and dark skin. Alas. Love from Mexico!
I'm sure when you finish school you're ideas and designs are going to be so great they will speak for themselves no matter which body type or color they are on!
I am a Bengali girl, and colorism is really bad in the Asian community. I remember having a conversation with my cousin a few months back and he kept making a lot of colorist remarks. I called out his bullshit and tried to explain colorism to him. In response he said, and I quote “Now you’re just making up words” when I said the word colorism. He honestly got me so pissed. He’s darkskin himself, but only wants to date light skinned girls, he said he doesn’t find brown (or Bengali-Asian) girls attractive, and that’s why he wants a light-skinned Latina girlfriend. The sad thing is that most of my male cousins are like this. After me going off on him trying to explain what colorism is to him, he said he understood what I was saying, and thanked me with a defeated look, though I doubt I really changed his mind about anything. I just hope I at least encouraged him look into his own biases and research shit like this.
Hi. I'm a Bengali too. And i completely relate to your experience. Especially now with the beard trend, men with darker akin tones pretend to be more masculine, while they want pearly white women. And what really annoys me is people complimenting me just because of my fair skin. Can we move past skin colour already please ?? I don't need compliments at the cost of colourism
Your cousin has to embrace and KNOW the true goodness about his complexion before he can live reality .....live in peace. Sad part of this is when a person does not know their own significance, they gravitate toward someone who is the opposite of them AND they can become abusive. So their relationship is not as rosey as it seems. Too sad, ESPECIALLY when there are children involved.
so true!!! a friend of mine said that I was making-up the word "colorism," like it just shows how illiterate people are when it comes to skin-color related issues.
“People will do anything to put you down and make themselves feel better.” The root cause of all forms of inequity. You are exceptionally sharp and your insights are so valuable. Thank you.
Men aren't subjected to colourism as harshly as women. I'm a dark skinned south African woman, men my shade are referred to as "brown" "not really dark", but I'm described as dark black 🙄
You weren't around in Britain in the 90s. Hard core colorism. Lightskin American fellas were all the rage. Then the darkskin guys like Wesley snipes and omar epps came along. Loved epps. My faves are djimon hounsou and Daniel kaaluya. They are gorgeous.
This is a lie!!!!!! We are harshly. Women here want light skin and lighter men. Literally have fetishism of their children being lighter. Dont lie like this, it ain't cool
As a Filipino I honestly relate to y'all's situation. Growing up I was thought that brown and/or black skin is undesirable and that I shouldn't really expose my skin to the sun or else I'm gonna be Darker than I already am. And sad to say that bullshit got into me, there was a time where I wanted my skin color to be whiter and think and bully others who have brown skin like mine as ugly. But thank goodness I realized that, that was complete bullshit and that I should love myself and other like me just the way that we are. Sadly my family and almost everyone I know didn't have the realization that I have and still think that way to this day. Also I noticed that Growing up (and even to this day) there's a lot of colorism in the media, where actors and actresses who have east asian and/or eurocentric features or has a east asian and/or eurocentric blood are more prefer than actual actors and actresses who are full blooded Filipinos. And also I noticed that some of the skin whitening clips that you've shown are actually from the Philippines, like that guy that looks at the white skin woman and that brown skin to like skin clip . . . Our country and the world in general still has a long way to go, but thanks to amazing people like you, people are starting to realize the bullshit behind colorism. So thank you and you are beautiful, stay safe 😊💕
As an Arab we have that "Improve the race" term too. So my dad won't approve of a dark Suitter even if i love dark skin and i am devastated and furious.
@@treanishajackson2295 YES. depends on which arab country tho . You wouldnt see me step foot in lebanon or kuwait . I would go to south part of egypt tho
Well i’m an Arab too and i can tell u that when it comes to marriages it’s not just the skin colour or the nationality or even the religion that can be the barriers.. some people take it so far that they won’t let their children marry from another city or another surname, like they have to marry someone from their own big family like cousins and far relatives.. it’s not everyone tho, and thank god they are changing now..
I have never laughed so hard at a video that still managed to be so educational, profound and timely. Your energy is amazinggg. I love your videosss :)
Right! These important issues can be so draining and rightfully infuriating but she manages to talk through them in a well balanced way. I love it here!
"Get better lighting!" Exactly! How is it your fault that the photographer took a bad picture?!? If someone took a picture of me and my pale skin with too much flash, it would wash out my features too, why do people have to be all racist about it?
As a Mexican American, thank you for sharing the telenovelas part. i always wonder why I never looked like any of the actress on the TV, a little brown mexican american girl who was always told to not play outside cause you'll get darker, or eat this to get lighter. It's still something people with the latinx community doesn't want to actually talk about and when the conversation is brought up. I'm just happy to see younger generation talking about things that other generations don't want to talk about. These things genuinely do make you insecure and lead to bleaching. Now that I'm in my mind twenties, I'm unlearning that. I love my brown skin and even more so that I look alot closer to my native ancestors. When my family says little colorist comments i just say don't project your selfhate on me. 🙄
YESSS same here, I am an afro-latina.. I am unlearning everything and replacing it with love and healing... My mother is from El Salvador, they have the same issues but probably not as bad as Mexico
I am from the second whitest state in the US, Maine. My boyfriend is from Hyderabad, India. He is considered dark in his country and was frequently turned down by girls growing up because he was "too dark". He also has described the hierarchy of attractiveness based on how fair you are. It makes me so sad that he feels ugly, or doesn't want to be outside because he would tan. I think he is so incredibly handsome. But as a person of irish ancestry, who is literally see through, I have never had to expirience what he has. Those ideas of your skin tone being indicators of your worth, never were engrained in my mind by society. All I can do is try and show him that to ME he doesn't need to change. And i think talking about colorism and videos like this are going to move us in the right direction.
Bless your heart ❤️ . I love Irish gingers major major crush on gingers . Thank you for being a great person to your husband. Wish you all the best honey 😘
@@thedestroyer9024 You're just contributing to the problem. Now dark skin men aren't allowed to date white women because it will make them colorist? Date whomever you want, just don't dismiss people based on their skin color.
@@thedestroyer9024 You don't know anything about their relationship, you've read ONE youtube comment, and you think you know enough to tell them to break up?
So excited to learn you're Gambian! My husband is Gambian and I'm Finnish and we have a beautiful baby boy! My husbands skin is on the lighter side tho so he says everyone says he doesn't look like a typical Gambian apparently. I like watching videos like yours to inform myself on important matters like light skin privledges so we can raise our son right and I'm so glad I found your channel!
I’m light skin Brazilian and I work in Asia for 20 years. Before I came here people used to tell me to not get a tan, cause if my skin looked darker I wouldn’t get work. Recently it down on me how every opportunity i had in life its because of the tone of my skin. It’s pretty crazy and sad that in this day and age this shit is still going on. Thank you for making these essay videos, I love your channel.
It’s so crazy how people can have such different experiences even within the same culture. I’m a fair Brazilian as well, and I grew up in the USA. And all my life I was made fun of by the other Brazilians in my schools for being “so white”. So much so that they would always challenge my claim to being Brazilian. They would test me on Portuguese words and keep me out of their friend groups. Sadly this made me feel really horrible about my heritage for a large part of my childhood because I didn’t feel accepted by my own people. So it wasn’t until I got older that I even knew colorism was also a thing in Brazil. Globo ran a really well-done report on colorism/racism in Brazil that really helped me to understand it better.
I burst into tears (seriously ugly, snotty sobbing) when Khadija said her mother bleached, but later stopped and allowed her natural complexion to return. I am in awe of the strength she found to turn away from the pressure the comes from colorism in that moment. And I think about how much of an inspiration her daughter :) must've been for her. This essay was super insightful. Thanks so much for sharing.💛
I was literally watching Grown-ish yesterday and looking at the black people like damn, they black, but they mostly white skinned. And then I started thinking about how to lighten my skin to look like them...😭 BTW you are so black and beautiful and you give me confidence. And your routine be like the 7 step Korean routine.
True (about Grownish) Most of these "black" TV shows don't really have black people. Most of them are mixed or light skinned. It's as if dark skinned people don't exist in the US.
I watched a video on how integration of media or something in the US led to a centring of the white gaze and subsequently the ‘erasure’ of darker skinned representation in media- it was pretty interesting to see the trends as the years go by
So many white people never think about those topics. They just don’t know how privileged they are. I loved your video so much. Of course I don’t know how it is to be black. I’m in a wheelchair and I know how it feels like to get stared at or to have less job opportunities, just because your legs don’t work. And dating is another issue. There are ppl who wanna date u just to be with someone with a disability, and the majority is just scared. Thankfully I found someone, who doesn’t care. I think nobody should be discriminated against, because of their outer appearance. And the media should represent all those differences, because that is what makes us humans interesting and special. ❤️Katy
I've heard it used by darker people on someone slightly lighter just to insult them or claim they're not as dark as them. I think too black should be put on the shelf of slurs & should be made unnacceptable. How can you be too something that God made you?
It's always "Too Black" and never "Too light" Don't get me wrong both are beautiful but if one is gonna be considered ugly then give the other side the same energy.
This pisses me off soo much. I’m from Germany but my ethnicity is afghanistan meaning I’m brown probably considered light-skin. But I know what racism feels like and I know that every person of a darker shade has a life much harder than mine when it comes to racism especially black women and it pisses me off that black people get treated and taught like they are not desirable and I’m just like WE ALL CAME FROM BLACK WOMEN SHOW THE GODS OF CREATION SOME RESPECT BITCH
I love your energy and knowledge! I'm a middle aged white dude trying to educate myself a little better and I'm horrified at the thought of the skin lightening industry, but at the same time understand what would drive a person to do this. Beauty standards in this world are truly f'd up! The washing machine commercial was truly horrifying. I edit commercials for a living and the thought of being presented a script for something so heinous gives me the cold sweats!
imagine having your whole shade discontinued... just throw the world away. people just don't understand how damaging this things are. im so glad i found your channel🥺
Colorism exists in Turkey too. Even though we are classified as white, in Turkey whiter and more European you looking people are treated better than more Middle eastern looking ones. Soap operas are also a really major thing in Turkey and especially female characters are almost always blonde and very European looking and generally the people who are casted as poor or criminals look more middle eastern . İt is also appearent in social life too. For example they used to tease my mom about how my sister look more middle eastern than my mom and how she was unlucky because of it. After ı was born my grandparents apparently paid more attention to me and said how ı was light skinned like my mom and it is a good thing so my mom found my sister trying to get whiter using soap in the bathroom and crying :( we look exactly the same with my sister now and ı am not european looking too but still even slight tone differences pays a big role in how society treats you.
I'm from Latin America and was also made fun of because of my curly hair and my darker skin tone growing up. It took me years to realize that having darker skin and having curly hair could be seen as pretty traits. I wish there was more REAL representation in tv shows and films. It really helps you build your self-confidence when you see people like you succeeding or portrayed respectfully.
I'm not black. Your skin is honestly gorgeous, the way the light reflects from your skin is so beautiful. I don't understand why would anyone hate your skin tone !!!
This video made me emotional! There weren't many people who know about or talk about colourism existing in Asia especially in India. As a dark skinned Indian myself, I've been bullied a lot for my skintone and i related to everything she said. Much love to you❤️
As someone who is a light skin Nigerian ...I do get it because when I'm actually in the sun I do tend to get more tan than I already am .. Its really annoying that most Nigerians keep bleaching their skins just to appear prettier.
As a light skinned mixed person living in Europe it's extremely interesting to hear your perspective on this. I've wondered for a long time about why there are so many light skinned pop stars and so few with really dark skin. Colourism being one, if not THE main factor in this makes a lot of sense.
1. MAGNAMINTY FROM LUSH! LOVE IT! Seriously love lush products. 2. You are GORGEOUS! No lie. Your complexion is so clear and smooth I'm a bit jelly. 3. I'm printer paper white and boy do I DESPISE colorism. It's not wrong to be white, and it's not wrong to be black or brown. Darker skin tones are just as beautiful as lighter ones. 4. Have I mentioned you are beautiful? Because you are. Full stop.
When my sister was 8 years old she told me if you really want to know if a light skinned person really is beautiful to people or not just picture the person dark skinned. I didn't realize what she meant until years later. The minute you are light skinned you are deemed more beautiful or attractive than your other darker skinned counterpart even if you have more "beautiful features"
Is it bad that I do this with people with long hair?? Like I feel like there's still this ideal about long hair but to me I feel like people with long hair are seen pretty because it blocks from their faces or whatever... But would they get the same treatment if their hair was shoulder length or shorter. Would they even look as put together? Me personally I'm scared to cut my hair but when I see someone with shorter hair especially if they dye it too I'm like dang that person is courageous lol I could never!!
When you showed the before and after pictures of Vybz Kartel, I nearly fell over😂. But on a serious note, I love your videos and this is excellent. I especially loved that you plainly, unemotionally stated your own experience with colorism. These video essays are pure excellence. Can't wait to see your TedTalk!
You're insanely attractive! Yes, your skin is to die for-- friends have been hinting masks to me for years but I'm too lazy. Great topic and I'm surprised it doesn't have more views. Scary world we live in, but thank goodness for dolks not afraid to be themselves
Colorism is real in Mexico! One of my sisters is darker than myself and my other sis and she literally talks about how she's so ugly compared to us because she's 'prieta'. ☹ I'm def. trying my hardest to empower her and educate others!
I never realized how ignorant i was until i watched your videos. I had to think about my biases i never knew i had and i was horrified with myself but i believe i became a little bit better as a person. Thank you for educating me when i was supposed to educate myself. I hope i can make the world a little bit better for everyone else with the things i learned.
As a mexican I can tell you the colorism here is really bad my whole childhood I've been the butt of the jokes because of my skin tone and yes the phrase "mejorar la raza" it's really used in mexico and the funny things is that the people that have light skin in mexico act like they are the oppressed ones so yeah it was a really interesting video
@DezeraeN well like you said it's exhausting having people pointing out your appearance but i don't think it compares to the amount of mockery dark skin mexicans receive on the daily by their own people also idk if you actually live in mexico or the us because in mexico people use derogatory terms to refer people with dark skin such as priet@ and use words like güerit@ or blanc@ to compliment someone so yeah I don't think is the same thing like you said before
@@ariatnar.1708 yes, and calling you indi@ and plenty of derogatory terms is so sad, making dark skin and indigenous sound like is a crime to be born this way
@DezeraeN well at least they aren’t treating you bad, dark skinned Mexicans receive plenty of judgement and problems, they are seen as less than, as inferior, the only comments I’ve heard about light skinned Mexicans is some US friends who thought that my friends where too white to be Mexican nothing derogatory, but you know Mexicans come in every color and it’s ok, I hope this can change slowly for the better
I don’t like to hear black guys say- I only date light skin women. Because if a light skin girl turned around and told him “ I only date light skin men” he would be sooooo offended.
he would literally get mad, and maybe violent, (seen it happen)
Yess
That actually happened in the UK when a mixed race (black/white) women contestant on a popular show stayed she did not date black men. Black men were amazingly offended that their preference did not prefer them 😂😂
These men have been brain washed by society
EXACTLY!!! They are such hypocrites.
My own dark skin brother told me “it’s okay for men to be darker because it makes them more manly but women have to be lighter because it’s different, darker skin on women doesn’t look right” and when I told him “I have dark skin, what do you have to say about that”, he replies “you’re not that dark, you’re more caramel” but I know he also dislikes women of my complexion which is sometimes considered "brown skinned” or from what I’ve heard “safe black” so he only said that because I’m his sister and I’m still too dark for the black man. I’m going to start calling those type of black men racist because I’ve also been told by black men that “black women with natural hair have slave hair”, many express their hate for our dark skin, tell us we should “embrace” our natural hair but in the same breath tell us they hate our hair texture.
i’m so very sorry about that! you shouldn’t have to lighter to be appreciated by a man. your not an object
Lmao if he was my brother I would have just told him he's dumb and couldn't do 20 pushups right now if he wanted to. Then hit them with strength is never just physical but mental too. But for guys to be like natural hair is slave hair smh beyond dumb. What would guys have to be worrying about hair for anyways they cut theirs off or make dress they have no right to be talking about a woman's hairs 🤷🏽♀️ I'm sorry you heard those things
my brother says i look like harriet tutman i be like "atleast im famous" plus im light skinish and he is too he also said "i dont date people that look like you" then he does and it fails because i tell them he a player
@@CyveIsShy harriet tubman was beautiful, there’s nothing wrong with her i don’t see why he’s complaining. she’s a queen. besides i don’t think “people like you” would give someone with that attitude a chance. just know your a queen❤️
There is some story behind what your brother said actually.
I have watched a lot of street with Black people being asked about 'light skin vs darkskin' And interstingly enough most Black men said they preferred Light skin women, meanwhile most Black Women said they preferred Dark skin men.. One of the girls even said 'Light skin men are weak and gay'. The girls usualy said they prefered Dark Skin because they are stronger and more 'manly'. The men usuallt said they prefered Light skin because Dark Skins are too loud, mean,agressive,unapproachable and have an attitude. All these steryotipes were specially perpetuated by Dark Skin men.
After this I checked some theories online and apparently Dark Skin is seen as masculine, meanwhile being Light Skin is seen as feminine.
It is a weird psychology but people have these ideas in their brains, unfortunately sounds difficult to change it and put us at same position.
My mom use to tell me this poem/quote and it went like this. "When she is told she is too dark, i do not hesitate to offer that the sun loved her so much, it kissed her more than the rest of us". the hatred for darskin has been around to long and i think it stems from jealousy and the need to feel superior
Your mom is amazing for teaching you that. Bless her heart
Love. This.
Oh wow, that's a beautiful quote
This is beautiful.🥺
That's so cute. I have heard that so many times. I'm a coincided dark skin women because my Senegalese father told me constantly that I was beautifuly made by him and my mother. My midnight skin is flawless!!
A few years ago, a lady from Africa saw my daughter (who is mixed and fair skinned) and said, "her skin is so beautiful. What cream do you use on her?" I was confused and asked what she meant, and she said, "she's so white. I want to use it on my daughter." I wasn't offended because she wasn't being offensive but I was sad to hear it. Her baby was gorgeous, dark skin and all. I told her "it's her natural skin. It's just her. Pretty like you daughter, don't you think?" And it shocked her, and made me wonder, who told her her black baby wasn't beautiful?
I'm glad you said something. There's no reason why a child should grow up feeling less than because of skin or hair or even eye color. Literally as long as the baby/child is healthy that's all that should ever matter🤷🏽♀️ I mean life isn't easy regardless but whatever that kid is going to be they will get there and that's what's important. I don't get why mother's so willingly shame their kids for nothing smh.
@@jeanetteh.8393 You can not expect much from a traumatized mother. People pass on their trauma's to their children. The mom, was probably made to feel ugly about her own dark skin and she is trying to prevent that fate for her own child. If you look at it from a compassionate stand point, you will realize the mother actually loves her baby and is trying to prevent her baby from experiencing the pain of colorism, which the child will inevitably experience from the world. We can all try to pretend the mother is solely responsible for the perpetuation of colorism in the Childs life or that the kind words of some random stranger who has a mixed child will bring enlightenment to the mother... but we all know that is BS. All black people need to heal, including those who pretend not to be colorist. Period
I'd get mad at her for being like that towards her child. There's a saying, if you don't respect yourself, then why others should :/ I'd scold her for being prejudice/racist/judgmental or w/e it is towards her own child because of her skin tone, like what Oo. That's unacceptable.
That is just endlessly sad. I have never seen a girl/woman that I did not feel is pretty.
I went to a hairdresser who was also light skinned and she asked my mother if I was ‘half-cast’ 🗿. Mind you my parents are both black, it’s just my mom is much lighter and my dad is dark skinned 😅
I’m at the lighter end of the spectrum, and I will never forget this one event that happened in 2015. I had gone to the Bahamas for 2 weeks, and of course I came back several shades darker. The day that I went back to work, my coworker (a dark skinned man) said something along the lines of “don’t go outside too much. You’re going to ruin your pretty light skin.” I am still shocked. Like does he hate himself? And why is getting darker ruining my skin? If anything I had a healthier glow.
Well, actually you can get sun damage.
@@jenn4593 sure, but that's different from "ruining pretty light skin"
That’s something that’s very common amongst black men. It’s come to a point now where black men are the biggest group that perpetuate colorism towards black women. They don’t include themselves in that belief as they basically view dark skin as ugly on their women counterparts only. They hide this under “preference” when in reality, how are you different to a racist if you judge a person based on their complexion? It’s laughable really. Just look at the rap, Hollywood and sports industries. Majority of couples are a darkskin men with light skin or biracial/multiracial women.
@@TheMariadee1 Yeah it’s true. You rarely see these celebrities with darker skinned women. I feel like having beliefs like this about women is a slap in the face to their mothers and sisters. Hopefully more and more darker skinned women will be recognized as beautiful by the media. It seems like that’s the only way to change people’s perceptions of beauty.
@@jenn4593 People who can tan shades darker instead of burning are much less likely to get sun damage anyway... you're making excuses.
OMG when you talked about Mexico I was like: "YES FINALLY!" When I tell my friends (non mexican) about how racist the media is in México everybody seems not to take it seriously. But I know, I watched all the lightening hair/skin treatments ads during my growing years. I watched only extremely skinny, white people behind the screen.
And then when I happened to get together with a blond/white person I watched in pain how my whole family and some friends were so thrilled for me to have "blond children" (which by the way LOL they look more than me than anything). To this day the comments of people being sorry for my children not to have inherited my husband's blue eyes or golden hair, make me so sick.
And I wished there was more awareness of the topic of colorism in Mexico.
EXCELLENT VIDEO!
My light-skinned Spanish teacher in high school basically outright talked about this with no self awareness whatsoever. And my naive white American ass did not question it whatsoever. This was like 18 years ago, so I don't remember the details but something like how having more Spanish blood is considered better in Mexico (or something like that), and then he, with a lot of pride in his voice, said how much it applied to him (or something, forgive me if I have the cultural details wrong.) I just think back in my head about it all the time - because I remember the almost smug pride in his voice basically praising his light skin - and I never thought twice about it.
Ooooo yes! The caste system the Spanish imposed on us was just organized bureaucratic colorism.
But as a chicana/chicane, I do identify proudly as mestizo cause if I’m gonna be put into a racial/color category it’s at least gonna be the one from the colonizers I’m descended from and not the mess of the USA. Note: my mom is brown and when he lived in Mexico my dad was white (he’s brown now cause he spent more time in the sun living in MN and now has that melanin activated) and besides disliking that my mom was Catholic my dad’s family (aka cousins and aunt) didn’t like that she was so brown. Her dad was so dark brown he would be thought of as black, but yeah we also have an ancestor or few that were enslaved Black folks on my mom’s side of the family. And no I don’t speak often with that part of my dad’s family, also cause they’re homophobic and I’m queer af. 😂
My mouth is physically open at the Asian advert with the washing machine. No I can't even
Yeah. it made me 😶
This is so disturbing
right? that was literally so disgusting
I'm from the Philippines Having a good healthy skin is all that matters. Period. 💕
I was like WHAT!! and why tf would he participate in something like that???? No amount of money is worth lowering yourself (and your race) like that.
@@blessedtobealive I HIGHLY doubt he was given the entire concept of the commercial. He probably was told about his portion, he acted it out, got paid and went home.
I read a quote from the Ewe people and it said, "until the lions have their own historians, the history of the hunt will always glorify the hunter." If we dont tell our own stories, we will only see what they want to show.
I have always loved this quote. That part 👆🏽💯
Where do the Ewe people live?
@@cometmoon4485 I dont know much about them but wikipedia says that they are primarily along the coastal regions of West Africa. Covering Ghana (the largest population), Togo (second largest population), southern parts of Benin and Nigeria.
so true... and we must TELL our stories, because they ARE out there, we must pay attention to those who VOICE them, such as this young lady on this TH-cam video...
Omg I’m Ewe .This made me so happy skskskdkdks
Her childhood pictures were the most adorable thing I saw this week. Seriously 😍 so cute.
I was thinking the same!
Me tooooo
I agree.
Right??
I be confused when ppl try to make fun of our African features..... FOOL I'm AFRICAN who the heck else am I supposed to look like ‼️🤦🏾♀️
Right, when you expose their anti Blackness they just leave you alone.
@@israeliana Or they label you at 'too emotional' as if being insulted is something I'm supposed to just take.
Goodness, and the texture discrimination as well. It is truly sickening the way so many African countries have been brainwashed to thinking that one must have Eurocentric features. So many people lighten their skin, relax their hair, and even wear contacts. It is so sad!
It’s so sad! How could make fun of such beautiful people
🙌🏾 okay 👏🏾
your skin tone is fucken incredible, so beautiful, wtfff
It's gorgeous.
I agree its wonderful ♡
when I was little, I used to think "dark skinned women look gorgeous, I wish I looked like them". now I learned to appreciate my white skin more. ofc I still think dark skinned women are beautiful, I love their naturally coily hair ❤️ we are all pretty, love you~
I know, right? Everyone I look at her, I think how beautiful her skin is.
Beautiful and brilliant!!! I can’t wait to see more of her work, And it’s amazing that it’s very dip diving on serious issues/subject , that is important to know but it’s are very complex and not so easy to digest, same are triggering or new point of view for me , but she is incredible full with knowledge and so interesting I learning so much I can’t even explain how much I appreciate her work. so yes beautiful and brilliant person 💕( I hope I don’t have to much problem in my grammar, my English is not the best😬 so I’m sorry if the comment is not so clear )
Giiirl... I feel like being black, being of a darker skin tone is just a lifelong freakin social experiment we've never asked for lol, very eye opening, once you're able to shut down the self hating voices in your head 😳
To my black sisters out there, my dark skin girls, black folks YOU.ARE.WORTHY, YOU.ARE.BEAUTIFUL ❤️
AMEN ❤️ And thank you for this message ❤️
Thank you I’m not like really dark but I’m definitely not white passing 😂😅
If I have brown skin, am I dark-skinned? Am I? Right?
Representation is so important and the fact that the black community is still fighting this fight is frustrating to say the least. When it comes to colorism, I truly believe that the black community isn't doing enough. Dark skin women are divine and the world can't handle it. 👑
yeah and everyone accepts the ish that mixed =black. like naaaawwww. And the majority of us black people are represented as light to white skinned when we mainly brown to darkskinned
@@Charnaniganss RIGHT😭😭 like gat dammit I wish I was dark skin
You guys will continue to fight forever until you learn nepotism and to love your own more then everyone else. Good luck lol.
@@Charnaniganss Oh GAWSH the mixed= black argument gets on my last nerves. It's just willful ignorance at this point 🤦🏿♀️
@@kennedyjojackson1202 Take your 23andMe - no matter how dark you are especially in the Americas you are mixed.
"a British writer named James Charles" she really got me there
It sounded like a legit British writer from the past
@@pegasusred8048 I know right
💀
I read this like 3secs before she said it💀
Seriously!!
The self-hate is SKRONG in dark skinned Black men unfortunately.
Amen... These men really need to heal. They pass these ideals on to their children, and ruin perfectly good relationships. SMH
No they hate black womans no themself.
@@blackdragonnation5579 poor thing. That’s how self hatred works, they project it onto others outside of them selves to try to distract from their own self hatred.
As a mix haition, that goes for dark skin black woman as well!
I just want to add usually when darkskin black women are praised they are usually all oiled up with an hourglass figure and are either nude or wearing revealing things (bikinis, lingerie, crop tops, etc) and while im not one i dont think that type of praise helps the cause in my opinion
Truuueee
Facccttttssss
Facts
Darker skinned Black women have to look like supermodels, goddesses or video vixens to be noticed. Corrective promotion is needed, we need the awkward, sweet girl next doors to be shown because we EXIST!!! We are multidimensional like everyone else.
There was a video I saw on IG where a dark skin black women mentioned that men will except the most basic women from any other race but when it comes to BW (especially darker skinned ones IMO) they have to look like an Instagram baddie to be considered desirable.
As a dark skinned BW you have to be a solid 10 to be considered anywhere as beautiful as a 5-6 of other races. At least as far as society is concerned
What is insane is her skin is literally georgeous and so striking...and evenly toned (which is near imposible to get with lighter shades of brown).
Yup, I'm 100 shades of beige and brown 😭
True, I have like 20 colours on my face
As a white girl with really bad acne growing up I was really jealous of dark skinned girls because their skin was so even and clean and you didnt see any redness from acne or rosacea. I hated my pale skin because every spot and splotch could be seen from a MILE away. Now I've learned to love my skin but I still think girls with dark skin are some of the most beautiful humans I've ever seen!
When will my skin be evenly toned 😩😩 her skin looks fucking amazing
IKR! I'm like an undercooked loaf of bread in a broken oven and it sucks a$$!
I am a light-skinned bi-racial girl from Europe, in Nigeria, I am called names like: white girl' but now I am in the Philippines for a couple of years, and here I am considered as a dark-skinned girl......learned a lot from these experiences....
To be considered beautiful as a dark skinned person your skin has to be extremely flawless to even be considered.
I know this way too well
You also need to have the "right features" like Lupita Nyong'o, Dickie Thot or Naomi Campbell : a small nose, not so thick lips and to be skinny.
Or have "exotic" eyes and pearly white teeth
@@mi-moon_ buffy the body
@@mi-moon_ With long/"good" hair...
As a mexican: Yes, telenovelas represent only wealthy people, people with dark skin rarely if ever get starring roles, they're usually the humble friend or the servants... they even get actors from other countries, like William Levy who is a blonde cuban, instead of giving those roles to mexicans. it's fucked up.
I grew watching novelas and asking my mom why she made me dirty 🥲
Happens here in India too, which is weird because 90percent of us are dark skinned and tv and movies pretend as if only the poor people are dark skinned
they search all of Latin America to find white people wanting to be model or act and that's what you see reflected in the media :/
so much elitism ugh and white ppl are already better off bc they get more opportunities and tend to earn more money than dark ppl. it's like the media wants to keep the racist class hierarchy and not give opportunities to non white ppl. this has been going on for centuries like aren't we tired??
same thing with brazilian telenovelas, even thou the country is mostly black and mix.
Thanks for including México 🇲🇽. Conversations about race and racism and color tend to ignore Latin America even tho we’re a huge part of the convo
Yes and for that reason and colorism there’s a lot of racism from Hispanics towards black people
Yeah people are starting realize that the hispanic culture has just as much if not more colorism going on than the black community. The hispanic motto is "better the race"...which is accomplished through procreating with lighter and whiter.
@@Alesana907 George Zimmerman perfect example
you're apart of colorism but NOT a huge part of the convo. black people are the huge part of the convo and then comes asian and indian people. i'm hispanic, american and black and i know the difference.
@sewerrat7418 no, you aren't.
I’m so glad you mentioned colorism on a global level! It’s terrible in Asian culture sometimes. I am half Chinese and half Cambodian, and when I was younger I was always rocked a much deeper tan than what I have now that I’m older and I was a lot more exposed to Cambodian culture, which is almost unfortunately nonexistent in my life anymore. I was always told by my grandparents and aunts, even my mom, who are on my Chinese side, consistently that I was “too dark” and as I got lighter as I approached my age now, my grandma has started telling me I am “prettier” and it’s always disgusted me and honestly just hurt lol. And it always bothered me that I was never able to truly embrace the southeast Asian in me because it is not really “popular”. When considering Asians its always Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc and no one ever knows about Cambodians, Laotians, Thai, etc. Idk it was always weird to me.
i know about cambodians, laotians and thai :( I want to be educated in everything
As a filo i've witnessed this... i was so privileged compared to my other classmates bc they were shades darker than me... they would even ask me if i used glutathione or what my tips for lighter skin were...
Filipino here. Yeah, colorism is really prevalent here, too. There were people I've met who literally said to me that darker skin is "ugly". The amount of demand of skin whitening products is rampant and overwhelming. The amount of people who are willing to inject glutathione to their bodies just to make them look white are high as if having darker skin is a some sort of disease that had to be treated. The amount of people stigmatizing darker skin people is terrifying.
There are literally people on social media getting some clout or popularity just because their lighter or having eurocentric features. And some of them had showbiz careers even though they were untalented. It is disgusting
Where I grew up (southern California) I was mostly used to dark-skinned Asians. Most of the people I knew were of Cambodian, Laotian, Filipino, or Vietnamese ancestry.
I actually think Southeast Asians are the hottest... I will admit to having a thing for Thai guys... however I've noticed that when you see pictures of them online it's mostly lighter skinned people... really annoying.
idk if its the university student in me but I love how she credits the photos in her videos
👀
She hasn’t been doing it recently buuuut thank you for noticing lol
@@KhadijaMbowe lol
As a black man let me apologize for all the dumb ass dudes you've had the misfortune to run across. Let me also say, your dark skin is absolutely beautiful.
this girl is educating me more than my school
Right!
Exactly!!
Just true
Facts!!
Women.......😶
Frankly, As a French Black woman from the West Indies, I really have felt what you describe. On the one hand, I mostly didn't feel desirable as a teenager growing up in a predominantly white environment and I came to understand through various remarks that is was mostly because Black women were not seen as potential partners at the time, even by my friends. And on the other hand, I recently had the displeasure to hear a guy that I was interested in tell me that his fantasy was to bang a Black woman. I don't think I have ever felt so sullied and commodified in my life. To this day, I don't really know why I feel so disgusted by racial fetishism.
I don’t at all want to tell you how you’re feeling but for me, hating being fetishized boils down to wanting to be seen as a whole person. I love being a black woman but it’s not all I am. Stay strong sis 💕
@@KhadijaMbowe You're definitely right about that. I felt profoundly dehumanized. When I told him, he told me that I should have felt flattered. A real winner, this one! Thank you :)
@@estelleg.7922 Ca craint, je suis désolé pour toi :(
@@KhadijaMbowe could do a video on Afrocentrism theory and black people being made from stardust. I think that’s a very uplifting and lovely video. Also Ethiopian beauty.
@@estelleg.7922 I‘m sorry that you had to go through such an experience and if it‘s any consolation (it’s probably not): Just be glad you found out before you wasted yourself on such an idiot.
For a Punjabi (North Indian) woman, my mom is darkskinned. She has like a golden medium brown complexion. She was called "darky" by her own grandmother and was constantly told she 'looked like a boy' and was 'ugly.' Even now, I can see how that affected her. She constantly uses makeup shades lighter than her own and that don't fit her complexion. She would use products that would be around my skin tone, and I'm light skinned.
I myself got lighter as I got older and I could see the difference in the way my white grandma would treat me. My brother was blonde with light skin and hazel eyes when he was a toddler and I would see all the people complimenting his complexion and that really hurt me when I was little.
The foundation thing isn't a joke.. I legit had tears in my eyes the first time I found my shade in foundation.. and I don't even wear makeup
That goes both ways. I'm as light as it can get, and just recently i see more brands that carry my shade. For the looongest time i had no foundation...
@@mrswieauchimmer2983 I’m the same way. I think Kat Von D was the first shade pale enough for me (ofc the lightest one she offered) but like I’m not the palest in fenty! (I think I’m like 3rd or 4th). I just always had to wear darker foundation and then for a while I just mixed it with some white stage paint I had to lighten it
Same goes for me as a totally white and pale person. If not for Korean brands I couldn’t even find a bb cream for me. And as a super fair westerner I always got teased for looking sick and unhealthy, even my grandmother forced me to sunbathing. I do have so many sun damages now due to this absurd obsession over skin complexion.
Honestly it's extremely hard for me as a mixed person to find shades that fit me correctly because most of the medium shades are like "white girl tan" very rarely do I find a shade that has the right undertones for my complexion. I don't even bother with makeup anymore
@@azaria4447 Have you ever had a look at Fenty foundations? They‘re said to carry a huge variety of shades.
11:02 A lot of black men, specifically on the dark side, project their feeling about dark skin onto darker-skinned black women Since, as men, they feel like they aren't allowed to express their emotions, feeling, or discomfort with jokes that their peers bully them with. Jokes about how their skin color is deemed as bad or undesirable, or a laughing manner. These jokes and micro-aggressions are internalized because they aren't addressed and it turns into resentment. So when they see darker skin black women thriving against all odds. When they see black women have the courage to express frustration and call out these same "jokes" as unacceptable. When they see darker skin women doing the emotional hard work to love themselves, they (Darkskin men) project and take their frustration out on them. It all comes down to self-hate.
PREACH!
👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
@@purpleflows5680 For me it was BM and lighter skin women. But mostly BM especially BM with my same skin tone...the irony!
Ooohh yes 🙌
They get especially triggered when they see a dark-skinned sistah with a White man. Just my own observation...
Khadija is beautiful, brilliant, gut-bustingly funny, captivating, and insightful. Oh. And her skin literally GLOWS because she's a fucking angel. Thank you for sharing with all of us!!
Did I mention that every time you sing or laugh I instantly feel a bit better about being born??
Legit the first thing I thought when I discovered her channel was “Damn, her skin is gorgeous.”
YES GORGEOUS! INDEED!😃
It's so smooth. Darker people are flawless. I'm not dark and people see ALL my blemishes and spots, it's so embarrassing.
@@annt.7785 don't feel bad baby just take care of your skin the best way you know how
Exactly! She needs to drop her regimen.
Same!
I am an Indian brown girl. And colorism is deep rooted here in India. I used to watch fairness cream advertisement and wanted to have that fair skin as they display it as the best thing you can ever have. I spend all my teenage years trying things to get fair skin. Beauty industry in my country made me believe that i was ugly because of my color. Anyway I love my skin now and do not care of what advertisements say(they still show the same thing). Just love who you are.
The war has just begun in India.fair and lovely whi** is ugly
As a fair skinned woman I'm sorry you felt this way but YOU GO QUEEN❤️
Brown girls are killing it babe
Good for you I’m sure you are beautiful
I know it’s a totally different culture but I never understood why people want such fair skin all the time. I have very fair skin (I’m half European and half American) and most of the time people comment on it negatively. I’ve come to love my skin color but I just hate how people are always picky about skin color and stuff, it’s weird to me.
Also why are you censoring white my dude? It’s a bit weird if u ask me😐
I will be honest. As a light skinned woman, I never considered colorism that heavily. I guess I just never realized how bad an issue it is because I never experienced it, so I didn’t realize how prevalent and ingrained it is in society.
Most people who benefit from the oppression of others are blind to it.
An important comment
you have such a radiant personality and don't seem awkward at all! I love the humor :))) also you're literally beautiful 🥺
was literally about to comment the same thing. your personality is endlessly entertaining to watch and i'm so happy i found your videos.
@Hybrid Vigour What do you mean by "this abusive relationship?" Not saying there is or isn't one. I'm just confused and don't know what you're talking about, lol. 😅
Dark skin is gorgeous, ages best, and hides imperfections like varicose veins that visually pop out with light skin.
#factsoflife
RADIANT IS THE PERFECT WORD
My grandmother use to say the darker the individual, the closer to God, aka “the sun”.
Awww I love that
Beautiful words from your grandmother.
Stealing this lol
That's awesome
@I Dk Made up?
As an Indian Person from Malaysia this happens as well. When i was a little girl i was not only commented about my skin by others but it was within my indian community and worse still my relatives. It affected my confidence and i actually used to wish if i were fairer i would have less problems, i would be loved. I have had to learn to overcome this. Thanks young aunties like you! im learning self acceptance and most importantly self love. THANK YOU.
I see Lupita and I click. You can't tell me she's not a goddess.
This is the reason I'm here 😏
Lupita is everything 🤩 from her skin to her personality
Agreed ☺
There is only one God
@@danford7827 and that’s god is lupita. Puuur
"when you're there (in Gambia) is not that you're black, you're just a person"
That hit hard af
Colourism is pretty normal in latino culture. I remember my own sister calling me “negra” (it’s not a direct translation of the N word, it means black but it is sometimes used in a “friendly manner” I don’t agree with that but yeah) as if it was some sort of insult just because I have darker hair. I’m half Italian and half Spaniard, I’m pale with dark eyes and dark hair but she would consider me “inferior” due to not having blonde hair . I also remember this guy (who i used to have a crush on EWWW) who told me not to worry about what my sister said cuz if I were “negra” he wouldn’t even talk to me. When that stupid green-eyes blonde said that I stopped liking him immediately. I mean I should have stop liking him earlier cuz he would call me “autistic” as if that was an insult (I’m not autistic but he though it was fine to call me that just people I’m not too social. It boils my blood how he thinks being autistic can be a trait to make fun of... tf)
Hey, i'm also from latin america and I'm also white with european descent and I have similar experiences: I used to have very blonde hair when I was little, very platinum. But over the years and because of the sun it got darker and now I have a light brown color, and all the people who knew me when I was a little girl say that they are sorry that this happened and it makes me feel very uncomfortable and insecure. They also say that I am very lucky because my parents have brown eyes but I have the green eyes of my grandfather, and the truth is that I do not know how to react to that...
What country are you from? I am from Argentina, and here they teach us from childhood that we all have European descent, but then I realized that in many parts of the country this is not true. There are many people who have indigenous descent or mixed but they are very underrepresented. It is good that we are proud of all the European immigration that we had years ago, but I do not like that they do that by being racist and despising others.
@@denaroth7296 aguante Argentina papá 🇦🇷
@@paula-lx3po Vamooooo
Okay so youre not dark at all.
@@meatballsandwich5329 does that mean I should not be aware of colorism?
Kids can be so merciless..being the only black girl in the grade in elementary school was one thing, but to be the only DARK skin black girl was another type of hell. Thank you for sharing this, and for breaking down colorism so well!
Growing up darkskin was so hard especially for women. I used to feel anxious the second skintone was brought up in school even when I was quiet people would go out they way to insult me. Im glad you were able to gain confidence in yourself
It' truly is traumatizing
Yeah I was a quiet kid too and people still went out of their way to say they couldn't see me whenever they turned off the lights.
I feel like as a man being dark skin was not so bad. I see lighter skinned men in my area getting less respect because they are seen as less masculine or gay
@@kaisolomon5187 Society says light=feminine and dark=masculine. That’s why dark skinned black men don’t face as much ridicule for their skin color and light skinned women don’t face as much ridicule.
@@user-eo9to7wd2t except through the legal system. Darker skin men are less likely to get the Job and more likely to get death penalty
Khadija your intellectual conversations, your way with humor, your incredible personality is both humbling and comforting at the same time... like a big sister... I adore your voice and want to thank u for all the time you put into your channel. Also, thanks for sharing personal experiences.
I'm Nigerian and colourism is soo prevalent there. There have all kinds of compliments for lighter skin. "Yellow like paw paw, sweet like sugar". I hated my shade when I was younger especially because kid my age, just as smart as me were treated better or nicer just because they were fair. I observed this hierarchy especially in church among the women. "Darkness" was closely associated to being mean-spirited, jealous and facetious. While being fair implied the woman was kinder, gentle and more feminine.
Bruh it was a whole damn song in schools 💀 I can't
I’ve watched so many Nollywood movies with my mom and the colorism is prevalent.
@Exotic Samba
They turned the biblical angel into the “typical” angel and since white skin is what they’re used to have a liking to, they’ll make the angel white. But of course not everyone is Christian and not every racist is white.
I’m pretty sure racism came from fear and paranoia but people just decided to take things way further than was necessary. When meeting darker skinned people, they were probably met with hostility, both sides had never seen each other. I think it also had to do with the type of culture colonists had (I don’t know anything about any culture hundreds of years ago). I doubt the people who trading slaves to colonists thought of enslaving literally everyone of the colonists’ people. I don’t want to say “Although the slave traders knew their technology was less advanced than the colonists” because I don’t know that for sure and even if that were true, we’ve seen many of their tribes fight with them and win.
@Exotic Samba
I’m just gonna reply to one part. As you said “…nobody is born hating dark skin…” Someone wouldn’t just become full on racist, there has to be a reason. But whatever the reason, you’re correct. They created false narratives to justify what they did.
I am Nigerian too but I was born and grew up in Europe. I did take trips to the country growing up. Nigerians are at most all on the darker spectrum. So if you grow up with people who look exactly like you shade wise you won't suffer from colourism. I am not saying colourism isn't there just saying that because everyone is dark there people at the end really don't care how dark you are. Those were my experiences. It also depends a lot on region and tribe of course. Igbos are relatively fairer than other southern Nigerians so I feel like colourism is more prevalent there than amongst other tribes. Colourism isn't as heavy compared to India, or Caribbeans or the US where colourism is connected to slavery and classicism in countries in Asia. Nigerian colourism is more connected to American and European influences in Nollywood movies, in fact, many actresses bleach a lot and that will have an influence on people who are watching those movies. They want to be more "Western" like. As Nigeria develops I am afraid colourism will sadly increase amongst Nigerians and we'll all become like Indians where dark skin is seen as poor and light skin as rich and privileged. Africans are eager to achieve the latter status.
Colorism in Mexico is huge, when I was little my mom used to put creams and lotions on my sister and me because she wanted us to be lighter (my mom's skin is lighter than ours). We didn't noticed it until we were teenagers and told her to stop. She excused herself saying that it was because we have freckles and wanted us to have even skin. Ammm she never ask if I liked my freckles hahaha which I do. I don't blame her, her family tends to be of the belief that lighter skin is prettier (most of them are light skin mexican)
Yes you are right is a huge problem, and god forgive if you happen to be indigenous they treated so bad, I’m sorry that happened to you, I constantly see my dark skinned friends be insecure and complain about the skin tone ☹️
My mum did that too. She said freckles are ugly and my face would look dirty. so i hated my freckles like forever 😅
Good that you stood up for yourself in your teenage years 👍
11:58 I literally gasped at this picture...it's stunning.
I come from India so we have this goddess named "Kali" she is dark skinned like the night sky and she is like this fearsome warrior goddess and I couldn't help but think of her when I saw it. Absolutely gorgeous
Which part of india are you from? Just curious.
lol lies again
I will NEVER understand the disdain for deep shaded skin. As a person with a medium tone, your skin looks like god damn satin compared to mine.
The first video I ever saw on this channel my jaw literally dropped because I could not believe how gorgeous this girl is! I haven't painted in a long time because of crazy bad depression and anxiety, yet this channel has inspired me to create again. I typically don't like putting such emphasis on physical appearance because exterior beauty is shallow and fleeting, but this lady is on a whole other level.
Oh, and fuck colorism. All shades of skin are beautiful. All humans are beautiful. Period.
Same, the way their skin shines in the sun is so beautiful to me 😍
She literally just explained the disdain.... Your comments are definitely coming from a good place but saying fuck colorism or you don't understand doesn't address the issue.
Literally...
The disdain is merely a reaction to prolonged systemic racism (imagine being exposed to it since childhood)
Funny how the way dark skinned black men idolize light skin women is actually not flattering at all talking about them being easy
This is off topic but your makeup had me frozen, you’re so beautiful and creative!! That really shook me, god you are amazing
@@Pinksupernova thank you girly
@Audenim Oshea cap asf
@Audenim Oshea I don't think that it is respect.
Sometimes it feels like they have to date a white woman, or they they see white women as a trophy.
Both stupid reasons for dating.
They end up not even treating the light skinned women right. If you can insult a woman you can take that same energy to insult another. No one talks about how these dark skinned guys end up still treating the light skinned badly.
I met a man from a dating site. I took my profile picture with good lighting. My intention was to highlight my real looks and not to be fake. It turns out that he thought that I was light-skinned. When we met in person, he was instantly unattracted to me. He even left me standing in my front yard to run after my light-skinned neighbor. She did the right thing, she walked off and ignored him. He was from Ghana and darker than I am but I was not light enough. Light-skinned and white men are more attracted to me than brown or darker-skinned men.
As dark skinned people, we should be able to talk about colorism without being gaslighted, but we should also talk about colorism without tearing down mixed people or disregarding their struggles. We should not cancel and withdraw support from successful mixed actresses as long as they are not contributing to the systemic problem (ie Zoe Zaldana, nina simone) remembering that civil rights icons like Katherine Johnson and Rosa Parks were lightskinned and also helped to pave the way, and that lightskinned people did not create the system. We should not automatically see a lightskinned person having success and judge them, otherwise we are just causing more "us vs them". Rather than tear down Lightskinned people, we should ALL try to lift up dark skinned content and creators. Lightskinned people should also do their share to make sure they are not fueling the problem. Examine the way you are raising your light skinned sons and daughters. and correct them if you see them putting down dark skinned peers. Monitor what YOU say, bc thats how children learn. Make sure you're not supporting dark skinned stereotypes, and be on guard about gaslighting dark skinned people who speak about the problem. Stay in your lane and listen openly to people who speak about struggles that you know nothing about. I hope more channels/videos like this pop up and alter the algorithm so those who are not dark skinned can educate themselves and help to fix the system instead of tearing down specific individuals.
This.
@C W hey CW!
Rosa parks didn’t help pave the way. Another girl before her stood up to racism like her (which I think is how Rosa was inspired) but because that girl was dark skinned her story wasn’t as broadcasted and Rosa’s was. Not tryna say you didn’t make any points...but...
Zendaya is the only biracial actress who talks about colorism. She's even stated she doesn't go after roles specifically marketed to her because she said, "She's the acceptable version of a black woman". Zendaya is aware and admits it others aren't willing to sacrifice something for a dark skinned woman.
@@Fuzzy_Slippers111 Activists used Rosa Parks to persuade more people to the cause because she was already a well respected person in her community. The original woman, Claudette Colvin, didn't have the "good hair", along with being darker skinned, but most importantly, *had a child out of wedlock.* There was no way in hell she was going to gain influence during such a sexist and puritanical era.
Rosa Parks did help pave the way. Soft martyrs are incredibly helpful for movements such as these-- it forces white people to question their own prejudices and justifications for bs policies. To turn a "Oh a woman was arrested? What for? Oh, a _black_ woman violated bus policy. That's what she gets for being one of those uneducated, whorish thug-- wait she didn't do anything? She just sat there?" to, "...So why do we have these policies in place when violence and crime have nothing to do with them?" Downplaying her contribution during such a volatile time is just ridiculous.
One time I was talking to this black man and during our whole conversation he was bashing dark skin women saying that they were too “loud” and “ghetto.” He said that he preferred light skin women because he wants light skin babies. He then proceeded to tell me that I should straighten my hair because he didn’t like it curly. Let’s just say last was our first and last convo. Scenarios like that are just the result of deeply rooted colorism but they describe it as their “preference.”
*Btw I loved this video and you are my new favorite channel🥰
You shouldve ask him, why dont you want Children your own color, what type of man doesnt want his offspring to look like him?
What men seem to forget is that their babies can still come out black passing hell even darker than them even if the kid is mixed it still happens.they annoy me with this “I don’t want to have black babies” when more than likely it can happen because they are black themselves lol
@@jessicaandersen6811 they probably do, so many boys disrespect the hell out of their mothers smh
ew
Sometimes I sound so quiet people ask me to repeat myself and I'm a black girl.
I can only dream of looking that flawless without foundation, your skin is STUNNING
There's the issue of mixed- baby fetish. I feel like in my country (Kenya), people marry white people just for the sake of having light- skinned children. It's so annoying how mixed race and light skin babies are considered cute, while babies with dark skin are disregarded. Its not that mixed babies aren't cute (of course they are), but the complete disregard of dark skinned babies being cute too (and I do find them to be really cute) is so hypocritical and says a lot about black self-hatred.
Another issue- black men not appreciating dark skinned women. But some white men (either due to fetishization of dark skin or genuine love) marrying women of darker skin tones. Honestly, most dark skin women get more compliments from white men than black men. The end result is these dark women being called gold diggers (because white people have higher status here) for marrying a white male (who are usually older). While many issues are intertwined in colorism, there's a lot of double standard.
I am not black (Afghan) but omg since I was little I LOVED black baby’s. Honestly I think they are even the most cutest baby’s (as you well said of course all baby’s) but really, for me personally blacks are sooooo cute ❤️
True
I’m Kenyan but live in America and it sucks. European beauty standards ruining the world
@@char6081 the world is gonna change somehow...and beauty is subjective
Hello there someone from Kenya. Well you got that right. And as part of the light community ( my skin is as light as they come) its often confusing to people when i say i dont have white blood. Its as if i must have it to fulfill the preconceived notion. Now im not complaining. The light skin privilege surely comes with perks. But just like masculinity it is constricting. Light skin shouldnt be smart, light skin is like a ping pong. She has no specific place to belong because she aint white enough or black enough. Light skin is expected by the black people who hold a grudge for the privileges she gets, to pay for a system of overt opression she didnt create. It is complicated and when you fight against the norm youre seen as not genuine enough because what could you be complaining about? You're light. A bright future lies ahead of you.
Your skin is literally rich, like the tone, consistency, and color….just buttery richness. Coming to terms with my darkness is an uphill battle because I feel as if I’m just dark - no butter, no smooth consistency, nothing. Sad Girl Moment.
God makes no mistakes. I hope you discover that being you, the color that you are is what you're supposed to be and you will be loved for that if you embrace it. And to be honest, many people want what they don't have, curly hair girls want straight and I always wanted darker skin, even use to lay in the sun to tan. But I'm finally accepting my brownness, wide nostrils, and even my gap in my teeth because it's me and I love myself. I hope you will try to love yourself.
I had a friend from Kenya who was very dark-skin. Some of my white friends said to me one day. When they saw her holding my son who was lightskin. I didn't realize how Black your friend Kadijah was until I saw her holding your son. I told them please don't ever say that again.
Interesting
@@davidcox3196 I never told her they said that about her, because my friend would have spoken to them harshly.
@@BronzeSista I understand
What I do not understand is how is that offensive. People like you make it seem as if it is bad to be dark skinned. It's like when you're with a child and that child says, oh look mom that lady is misses one leg and you immediately say stop it, don't say that, it's rude. 🗣Dark skin is not a handicap, people mention exceptional features all the time period. I think in the black community we have to start normalizing mentioning shades without being defensive or uncomfortable. Let us start to make it just a color and the rest will follow. I feel like the way we are going about it now is kinda fake. We act as if being dark skin is some horrible thing we should collectively avoid to mention in daily life. Unless someone is rude and uses foul language there is literally nothing to be defensive about.
@@loveydovey2805 I can tell you right now my friend would have been very upset if she heard our white friends say how dark she was.
I’m a darker Hispanic and I totally resonate with this! In most tv and music there’s lighter people opposed to darker ones. I feel most people don’t recognize how global this problem really is. Thanks for getting into all of this! Great vid!
That's probably why people like Celia Cruz really were looked up to.
@Shea Holland lmao so defensive there was no accusation at all. It was just an observation she was making as a "darker Hispanic." It's so blatant that the industry has a certain look they want to keep that anyone of different back grounds can see. I'm sure you can agree.. but she wasn't blaming anyone
@Shea Holland lol I bet... But not this comment specifically. I blame the industry I'm not big on celebrities but even the white celebrities look alike they all have the same facial features the same hair styles it's a look they're going for but it's not at all realistic or fair, half of the famous people don't even deserve the fame. 🤷🏽♀️
@Shea Holland I'm not complaining about shades. I'm not really complaining about anything is what I was trying to tell you I don't like celebrities to begin with 🤷🏽♀️
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Colourism is a worldwide epidemic. I'm not Black, I'm Asian, so I'm glad to hear your perspective on this! On my end, I grew up surrounded by skin whiteners and ads that equated light skin with being rich and dark skin being equated with being poor. There was a horrifically racist blackface Filipino TV series called "Nita" (if you google it you'll find the full title, which is, uh, worse) in 2011. It hasn't really gotten better imho
I've heard about the colorism in the asian community too. the weird thing is, in real life we don't see many dark skinned asian. I wonder where they're hiding lol. I only see the Chinese/white asians. I grew up around Vietnamese people, but I haven't seen any of them since I left my home city in California.
@@annt.7785 Indians, Middle Eastern Arabs, Southeast Asians are dark skinned 😂 bruh
They're not hiding anywhere, you're just not looking.
@@annt.7785 "in real life" well don't mind me and most of the people I know cease to exist.
To anyone curious the show name is “Nita Negrita”
@@isaac1976 i decided to research the show after reading the original comment. All I can say is 😳🤦🏽♀️
When I was in middle school we had a new student from Inida. Her mother became friends with mine and I remember her mother constantly going on and on about how beautiful I was because I was so pale. I could see how it made her daughter feel. And she brought some of that bleach for your skin to school to show me once. Her mother had bought it for her. I had no idea at the time that girls with dark skin went through this and it was so incredibly sad. I'm so proud to say she overcame alot of this and embraced her beautiful skin tone. She was Ms. Washington at one point and I love seeing how great she is doing.
I can’t believe that head chef said that omg that is so fucking disgusting. A lot of black men have deep DEEP colorism issues and refuse to acknowledge them and constantly project them and put black women in uncomfortable and uneasy positions. I’m so happy your video popped up on my homepage today you’re such a beautiful and brilliant woman
By Popular Demand. The sad part about it is that a lot of these black men will dismiss colorism and pass it off as just being a preference for light skin women so they can continue perpetuating and justifying hatred towards black women with dark skin or brown skin
You really said a word! One of the first things I do when talking to a man is root out any colorist tendencies smh. Can you imagine if you have children with a colorist man especially daughters?!?! The trauma chile...
You done crying
@@chocolateme7731 yess exactly they’re the first ones to belittle and deny that colorism exists yet they are the biggest perpetrators! it’s exhausting
@@Hola_ola_28 same siiisss! we cannot have these men further projecting their own self hate and insecurities
i really love how people are now talking about this. im filipino and i HATED the color of my skin as i was growing up bc people treated the fair skinned kids differently and obviously preferred the more fair skinned chinese-filipinos or the fil-ams (filipino-american--or basically anyone who was half filipino or half western). it was just only recent like a few years back that i finally accepted that i was beautiful and filipinos should be proud of being brown and not aim to be fair-skinned
Colourism in the Black community has been discussed for decades.
@@fawn2911 unfortunately not here in ph.
@@fawn2911 Not really it’s mostly darkskin women talking to people who don’t care.
@@monotonyuh414 No it's mostly black women who don't have light skin. So black women.
@@bunnywavyxx9524 in EVERY race this is an issue, it just being black period issue also so it can be worse at time but POC around the world suffer from this
I live in an asian majority country. And once I saw my female black neighbour being harassed by a local. He was drunk and was following her, making indecent propositions. I didn't know what to do to help, I was too young back then. My neighbor laughed it off and went about her day, nothing bad came out of this story, but it's gross nonetheless, it's both dehumanizing a woman and fetishizing her because of appearance.
Colorism is very prevalent in Senegal. Most of the women in their TV Dramas or news casters are light skin while most of the men are dark skin. It's annoying to watch how much light skinnedness is pushed into your face with every commercial, program etc. And then they wonder why bleaching is still very common😑😒
I definitely notice that on TV men are more likely to be dark skinned and women (especially if they're meant to be a desirable mate) are light skinned/bi-racial. The erasure is real.
It's crazy that basically, it's saying that if you are a man it's okay if you are dark skin (and even have kinky hair), but for women that's unacceptable and we need someone who can match that feminine image (lighter skin, etc). Maybe I'm reading too much into it but that's what I noticed
@@bandaqueenlove9134 same.
@@KhadijaMbowe I see this in so many movies and shows. I love the movie The Photograph with Issa Rae because it depicts black love with both people of similar skin tones.
Absolutely, even in my country in Africa the most desirable women tv personalities are light skinned and skin bleaching is common place. There is also benefits to getting hired, securing better marriage prospects etc. I am a lighter skin African also due to the practice of "marrying lighter" which encourages dark skinned men to seek light or very light skin women to have children that are lighter than them. This is an open secret and many times talked about bluntly. Many young African men will state flat out that they will not marry dark skinned women in order to have lighter skinned children. This dark skinned black men hating on dark skinned women phenomenon is global. 😑
Nothing wrong with dark skin and white teeth. People need to see what is really going on ❤🖤💚
Lol
Wow, my husband being from Mexico, I was already aware of colorism, but watching this video both opened my eyes even further and broke my heart. I'm so sorry to hear about what you've had to go through as a child. And what millions have to go through as kids. It's plain horrible...
I just discovered this channel. Amazing content. I’m from Mexico and colorism is very alive here. At design school we were taught that when doing adds for commercials we should use white skin instead of brown cause people prefer it and will buy the product more even tho mexico has a huuuuge number of brown and dark skin. Alas. Love from Mexico!
I'm sure when you finish school you're ideas and designs are going to be so great they will speak for themselves no matter which body type or color they are on!
I am a Bengali girl, and colorism is really bad in the Asian community. I remember having a conversation with my cousin a few months back and he kept making a lot of colorist remarks. I called out his bullshit and tried to explain colorism to him. In response he said, and I quote “Now you’re just making up words” when I said the word colorism. He honestly got me so pissed. He’s darkskin himself, but only wants to date light skinned girls, he said he doesn’t find brown (or Bengali-Asian) girls attractive, and that’s why he wants a light-skinned Latina girlfriend. The sad thing is that most of my male cousins are like this. After me going off on him trying to explain what colorism is to him, he said he understood what I was saying, and thanked me with a defeated look, though I doubt I really changed his mind about anything. I just hope I at least encouraged him look into his own biases and research shit like this.
@Rosalyn Richards Thank you, I really appreciate your words. I love myself and my brown skin ✊🏾
Hi. I'm a Bengali too. And i completely relate to your experience. Especially now with the beard trend, men with darker akin tones pretend to be more masculine, while they want pearly white women. And what really annoys me is people complimenting me just because of my fair skin. Can we move past skin colour already please ?? I don't need compliments at the cost of colourism
Your cousin has to embrace and KNOW the true goodness about his complexion before he can live reality .....live in peace.
Sad part of this is when a person does not know their own significance, they gravitate toward someone who is the opposite of them AND they can become abusive. So their relationship is not as rosey as it seems. Too sad,
ESPECIALLY when there are children involved.
YOU DID US ALL A FAVOR GIRL
so true!!! a friend of mine said that I was making-up the word "colorism," like it just shows how illiterate people are when it comes to skin-color related issues.
“People will do anything to put you down and make themselves feel better.”
The root cause of all forms of inequity. You are exceptionally sharp and your insights are so valuable. Thank you.
Y’all shes so pretty I CANT.
Men aren't subjected to colourism as harshly as women. I'm a dark skinned south African woman, men my shade are referred to as "brown" "not really dark", but I'm described as dark black 🙄
💯💯. And dark skinned men are considered attractive/ masculine
You weren't around in Britain in the 90s. Hard core colorism. Lightskin American fellas were all the rage. Then the darkskin guys like Wesley snipes and omar epps came along. Loved epps. My faves are djimon hounsou and Daniel kaaluya. They are gorgeous.
@@dinakisa1049 we are not portrayed as attractive and we are portrayed as masculine but in a videos way but im not saying we had it worse tho
True sis
This is a lie!!!!!! We are harshly. Women here want light skin and lighter men. Literally have fetishism of their children being lighter. Dont lie like this, it ain't cool
As a Filipino I honestly relate to y'all's situation. Growing up I was thought that brown and/or black skin is undesirable and that I shouldn't really expose my skin to the sun or else I'm gonna be Darker than I already am. And sad to say that bullshit got into me, there was a time where I wanted my skin color to be whiter and think and bully others who have brown skin like mine as ugly. But thank goodness I realized that, that was complete bullshit and that I should love myself and other like me just the way that we are. Sadly my family and almost everyone I know didn't have the realization that I have and still think that way to this day. Also I noticed that Growing up (and even to this day) there's a lot of colorism in the media, where actors and actresses who have east asian and/or eurocentric features or has a east asian and/or eurocentric blood are more prefer than actual actors and actresses who are full blooded Filipinos. And also I noticed that some of the skin whitening clips that you've shown are actually from the Philippines, like that guy that looks at the white skin woman and that brown skin to like skin clip . . . Our country and the world in general still has a long way to go, but thanks to amazing people like you, people are starting to realize the bullshit behind colorism. So thank you and you are beautiful, stay safe 😊💕
As an Arab we have that "Improve the race" term too. So my dad won't approve of a dark Suitter even if i love dark skin and i am devastated and furious.
Damn, arab people are so beautiful but i heard alot of arabs they treat darker ppl like shit. Is that true?
@@treanishajackson2295 i haven't seen them being mistreated, honestly. But it's hard for them to marry into other families, unfortunately.
@@rafagasim8464 oh ok
@@treanishajackson2295 YES. depends on which arab country tho . You wouldnt see me step foot in lebanon or kuwait . I would go to south part of egypt tho
Well i’m an Arab too and i can tell u that when it comes to marriages it’s not just the skin colour or the nationality or even the religion that can be the barriers.. some people take it so far that they won’t let their children marry from another city or another surname, like they have to marry someone from their own big family like cousins and far relatives.. it’s not everyone tho, and thank god they are changing now..
I have never laughed so hard at a video that still managed to be so educational, profound and timely. Your energy is amazinggg. I love your videosss :)
Right! These important issues can be so draining and rightfully infuriating but she manages to talk through them in a well balanced way. I love it here!
Hippo campus ayeee 🤍
Yeah I’m proud of her work ... and this is my first video .
"Get better lighting!" Exactly! How is it your fault that the photographer took a bad picture?!? If someone took a picture of me and my pale skin with too much flash, it would wash out my features too, why do people have to be all racist about it?
As a Mexican American, thank you for sharing the telenovelas part. i always wonder why I never looked like any of the actress on the TV, a little brown mexican american girl who was always told to not play outside cause you'll get darker, or eat this to get lighter. It's still something people with the latinx community doesn't want to actually talk about and when the conversation is brought up. I'm just happy to see younger generation talking about things that other generations don't want to talk about. These things genuinely do make you insecure and lead to bleaching. Now that I'm in my mind twenties, I'm unlearning that. I love my brown skin and even more so that I look alot closer to my native ancestors. When my family says little colorist comments i just say don't project your selfhate on me. 🙄
YESSS same here, I am an afro-latina.. I am unlearning everything and replacing it with love and healing... My mother is from El Salvador, they have the same issues but probably not as bad as Mexico
I am from the second whitest state in the US, Maine. My boyfriend is from Hyderabad, India. He is considered dark in his country and was frequently turned down by girls growing up because he was "too dark". He also has described the hierarchy of attractiveness based on how fair you are. It makes me so sad that he feels ugly, or doesn't want to be outside because he would tan. I think he is so incredibly handsome. But as a person of irish ancestry, who is literally see through, I have never had to expirience what he has. Those ideas of your skin tone being indicators of your worth, never were engrained in my mind by society. All I can do is try and show him that to ME he doesn't need to change. And i think talking about colorism and videos like this are going to move us in the right direction.
Bless your heart ❤️ . I love Irish gingers major major crush on gingers . Thank you for being a great person to your husband. Wish you all the best honey 😘
@@thedestroyer9024 please don’t say stuff like that. You don’t know the couple personally
@@thedestroyer9024 You're just contributing to the problem. Now dark skin men aren't allowed to date white women because it will make them colorist? Date whomever you want, just don't dismiss people based on their skin color.
@@thedestroyer9024 You don't know anything about their relationship, you've read ONE youtube comment, and you think you know enough to tell them to break up?
@@thedestroyer9024 Yeah I guess you could also be right, but it's impossible to tell with anyone.
So excited to learn you're Gambian! My husband is Gambian and I'm Finnish and we have a beautiful baby boy! My husbands skin is on the lighter side tho so he says everyone says he doesn't look like a typical Gambian apparently. I like watching videos like yours to inform myself on important matters like light skin privledges so we can raise our son right and I'm so glad I found your channel!
that is so sweet :) all the best for you and your family!
I’m light skin Brazilian and I work in Asia for 20 years. Before I came here people used to tell me to not get a tan, cause if my skin looked darker I wouldn’t get work. Recently it down on me how every opportunity i had in life its because of the tone of my skin. It’s pretty crazy and sad that in this day and age this shit is still going on. Thank you for making these essay videos, I love your channel.
It’s so crazy how people can have such different experiences even within the same culture. I’m a fair Brazilian as well, and I grew up in the USA. And all my life I was made fun of by the other Brazilians in my schools for being “so white”. So much so that they would always challenge my claim to being Brazilian. They would test me on Portuguese words and keep me out of their friend groups. Sadly this made me feel really horrible about my heritage for a large part of my childhood because I didn’t feel accepted by my own people. So it wasn’t until I got older that I even knew colorism was also a thing in Brazil. Globo ran a really well-done report on colorism/racism in Brazil that really helped me to understand it better.
Interesting
@@KaytchC1790 o colorismo no Brasil funciona assim: te zoam por ser muito branco ou te zoam por ser muito escuro
@@KaytchC1790 aqui tem muito colorismo entre pessoas negras também , sao situaçoes bem parecidas. Ja esteve no Brasil?
I burst into tears (seriously ugly, snotty sobbing) when Khadija said her mother bleached, but later stopped and allowed her natural complexion to return. I am in awe of the strength she found to turn away from the pressure the comes from colorism in that moment. And I think about how much of an inspiration her daughter :) must've been for her.
This essay was super insightful. Thanks so much for sharing.💛
I was literally watching Grown-ish yesterday and looking at the black people like damn, they black, but they mostly white skinned. And then I started thinking about how to lighten my skin to look like them...😭 BTW you are so black and beautiful and you give me confidence. And your routine be like the 7 step Korean routine.
True (about Grownish) Most of these "black" TV shows don't really have black people. Most of them are mixed or light skinned. It's as if dark skinned people don't exist in the US.
I watched a video on how integration of media or something in the US led to a centring of the white gaze and subsequently the ‘erasure’ of darker skinned representation in media- it was pretty interesting to see the trends as the years go by
So many white people never think about those topics. They just don’t know how privileged they are. I loved your video so much. Of course I don’t know how it is to be black. I’m in a wheelchair and I know how it feels like to get stared at or to have less job opportunities, just because your legs don’t work. And dating is another issue. There are ppl who wanna date u just to be with someone with a disability, and the majority is just scared. Thankfully I found someone, who doesn’t care.
I think nobody should be discriminated against, because of their outer appearance. And the media should represent all those differences, because that is what makes us humans interesting and special. ❤️Katy
@Isabelle Ivask I’m sry, but I don’t really see how that fits to my post 🤔 maybe I just understood you wrong 🙈
@Isabelle Ivask they didn't say anything about any continent lmao
You should make videos about your experience. If you don’t tell your story, people will never know.
Yes, i didn't knew. We don't think about cause we dont need to 😔😪 just as men don't thing about misogynism thing of daily life
@@nataliealves3889 Women are sexist against men too.
“Too black” is disrespectful.
There is no such thing as "too" black
I've heard it used by darker people on someone slightly lighter just to insult them or claim they're not as dark as them. I think too black should be put on the shelf of slurs & should be made unnacceptable. How can you be too something that God made you?
It's always "Too Black" and never "Too light" Don't get me wrong both are beautiful but if one is gonna be considered ugly then give the other side the same energy.
This pisses me off soo much. I’m from Germany but my ethnicity is afghanistan meaning I’m brown probably considered light-skin. But I know what racism feels like and I know that every person of a darker shade has a life much harder than mine when it comes to racism especially black women and it pisses me off that black people get treated and taught like they are not desirable and I’m just like WE ALL CAME FROM BLACK WOMEN
SHOW THE GODS OF CREATION SOME RESPECT BITCH
@@cinnamonpirate5294 Yes it's used to insult black people. Why would someone talk like that? Being dark skin should not be a bad thing.
I love your energy and knowledge! I'm a middle aged white dude trying to educate myself a little better and I'm horrified at the thought of the skin lightening industry, but at the same time understand what would drive a person to do this. Beauty standards in this world are truly f'd up! The washing machine commercial was truly horrifying. I edit commercials for a living and the thought of being presented a script for something so heinous gives me the cold sweats!
I laughed out loud when you said james charles sjfkskd
imagine having your whole shade discontinued... just throw the world away. people just don't understand how damaging this things are. im so glad i found your channel🥺
Colorism exists in Turkey too. Even though we are classified as white, in Turkey whiter and more European you looking people are treated better than more Middle eastern looking ones. Soap operas are also a really major thing in Turkey and especially female characters are almost always blonde and very European looking and generally the people who are casted as poor or criminals look more middle eastern . İt is also appearent in social life too. For example they used to tease my mom about how my sister look more middle eastern than my mom and how she was unlucky because of it. After ı was born my grandparents apparently paid more attention to me and said how ı was light skinned like my mom and it is a good thing so my mom found my sister trying to get whiter using soap in the bathroom and crying :( we look exactly the same with my sister now and ı am not european looking too but still even slight tone differences pays a big role in how society treats you.
I'm from Latin America and was also made fun of because of my curly hair and my darker skin tone growing up. It took me years to realize that having darker skin and having curly hair could be seen as pretty traits. I wish there was more REAL representation in tv shows and films. It really helps you build your self-confidence when you see people like you succeeding or portrayed respectfully.
People always told me I look like a mad lady because I am brown & had curly hair. People are so cruel
I'm not black. Your skin is honestly gorgeous, the way the light reflects from your skin is so beautiful. I don't understand why would anyone hate your skin tone !!!
This video made me emotional! There weren't many people who know about or talk about colourism existing in Asia especially in India. As a dark skinned Indian myself, I've been bullied a lot for my skintone and i related to everything she said. Much love to you❤️
In Nigeria many people "tone" their skin and use the excuse of "the sun in Nigeria makes my skin darker than it should be"
Haha so true! Of course the sun does tan the skin, but going ahead and bleaching is a bit of an irrational response 😂
As someone who is a light skin Nigerian ...I do get it because when I'm actually in the sun I do tend to get more tan than I already am ..
Its really annoying that most Nigerians keep bleaching their skins just to appear prettier.
😒
Lol that's ridiculous. I stay In the sun and I get darker and I love it. People are so stupid with their excuses.
Yes, my friend told me this bs. Where I live in America every African store sells bleaching cream. It’s sad and gross.
As a light skinned mixed person living in Europe it's extremely interesting to hear your perspective on this. I've wondered for a long time about why there are so many light skinned pop stars and so few with really dark skin. Colourism being one, if not THE main factor in this makes a lot of sense.
1. MAGNAMINTY FROM LUSH! LOVE IT! Seriously love lush products.
2. You are GORGEOUS! No lie. Your complexion is so clear and smooth I'm a bit jelly.
3. I'm printer paper white and boy do I DESPISE colorism. It's not wrong to be white, and it's not wrong to be black or brown. Darker skin tones are just as beautiful as lighter ones.
4. Have I mentioned you are beautiful? Because you are. Full stop.
When my sister was 8 years old she told me if you really want to know if a light skinned person really is beautiful to people or not just picture the person dark skinned. I didn't realize what she meant until years later. The minute you are light skinned you are deemed more beautiful or attractive than your other darker skinned counterpart even if you have more "beautiful features"
Wow i still do this and also tell people this. Just because its so deeply embedded in to your subconscious mind.
Is it bad that I do this with people with long hair?? Like I feel like there's still this ideal about long hair but to me I feel like people with long hair are seen pretty because it blocks from their faces or whatever... But would they get the same treatment if their hair was shoulder length or shorter. Would they even look as put together? Me personally I'm scared to cut my hair but when I see someone with shorter hair especially if they dye it too I'm like dang that person is courageous lol I could never!!
As a Indian woman from the darker side of the complexion scale I can 110% relate to this
Kool
In the USA lots of people say dark skinned Indian women are very beautiful and have the most beautiful hair
Wait you’re from the darker side of complexion? Idk if you’re the person in your TH-cam channel but your hella pale for an Indian person
When you showed the before and after pictures of Vybz Kartel, I nearly fell over😂.
But on a serious note, I love your videos and this is excellent. I especially loved that you plainly, unemotionally stated your own experience with colorism. These video essays are pure excellence. Can't wait to see your TedTalk!
You're insanely attractive! Yes, your skin is to die for-- friends have been hinting masks to me for years but I'm too lazy. Great topic and I'm surprised it doesn't have more views. Scary world we live in, but thank goodness for dolks not afraid to be themselves
Video was great. So much good info.
Kool
Making youtube video is hard, but making great/educational youtube video is on another level! You did the latter! Respect!
I can remember when I watched K.C. undercover for the first time, I was so confused as to why zendaya had two black parents.
Hahahah it's a little funny xdd
I didn't question it at the time bc I didn't know Zendaya was biracial
@@itshk9427
They fed us this lie that she was our black girl representation , she doesn’t represent people who look like me at all 🤷🏾♀️
@@AlatOnDemand she's not even black lmao
she had two black parents on shake it up as well.
Colorism is real in Mexico! One of my sisters is darker than myself and my other sis and she literally talks about how she's so ugly compared to us because she's 'prieta'. ☹ I'm def. trying my hardest to empower her and educate others!
sad
I never realized how ignorant i was until i watched your videos. I had to think about my biases i never knew i had and i was horrified with myself but i believe i became a little bit better as a person. Thank you for educating me when i was supposed to educate myself. I hope i can make the world a little bit better for everyone else with the things i learned.
As a mexican I can tell you the colorism here is really bad my whole childhood I've been the butt of the jokes because of my skin tone and yes the phrase "mejorar la raza" it's really used in mexico and the funny things is that the people that have light skin in mexico act like they are the oppressed ones so yeah it was a really interesting video
It's the same in India, I feel you
Colorism is so bad in Latin America. And Latino community.
@DezeraeN well like you said it's exhausting having people pointing out your appearance but i don't think it compares to the amount of mockery dark skin mexicans receive on the daily by their own people also idk if you actually live in mexico or the us because in mexico people use derogatory terms to refer people with dark skin such as priet@ and use words like güerit@ or blanc@ to compliment someone so yeah I don't think is the same thing like you said before
@@ariatnar.1708 yes, and calling you indi@ and plenty of derogatory terms is so sad, making dark skin and indigenous sound like is a crime to be born this way
@DezeraeN well at least they aren’t treating you bad, dark skinned Mexicans receive plenty of judgement and problems, they are seen as less than, as inferior, the only comments I’ve heard about light skinned Mexicans is some US friends who thought that my friends where too white to be Mexican nothing derogatory, but you know Mexicans come in every color and it’s ok, I hope this can change slowly for the better