Falling out of love with a narcissist - Realizing the mask they wear

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 89

  • @diamondonpurpose9145
    @diamondonpurpose9145 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    Once u know they no longer look human, attractive, or smart. Then you realize you weren't in love...but you knew that all along and couldn't explain it. The trauma bond explains what you couldnt

    • @SherryONeill
      @SherryONeill ปีที่แล้ว +6

      So True Diamond

    • @alsalazar6502
      @alsalazar6502 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wow!! That's Pretty Sick Behavior 😫
      And she acted so pure, so faithful, so loyal. And she didn't seem to really enjoy sex either....

    • @divinelyguided.111
      @divinelyguided.111 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ! Isn't that the truth !

    • @ddcreates4947
      @ddcreates4947 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      yes you get this sick ball of disgust when ever you see them or when they try to interact.

  • @TheAmazingRandy
    @TheAmazingRandy ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Once you accept that the true personality of the narcissist is the person they showed you during the destroy and discard phase and Not the person they pretended to be in the beginning - you are on your way to recovery. Good luck

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Absolutely! Accepting the truth about the narcissist's true nature is a crucial step towards healing and reclaiming your power.

  • @C4RYB34R
    @C4RYB34R หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I started to fall out of love with the narcissist a while ago...but this last little "cycle", this *last* little go around, I was hoovered, taken advantage of and discarded. So...Something inside me stopped caring. I just don't love him anymore. I feel nothing. I don't feel hurt, I don't want to reach out, or hold him accountable. I just do not care anymore. This is sad in *concept* but I just...can't and don't want to care anymore. what a relief.

  • @flightydancer
    @flightydancer 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    My ex was making me feel sad and broken. The abuse and insanity got worse over time and nearly killed me. I said to myself: what is there to love? He treats strangers better than me.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Start breaking free today , when you are ready to heal Check this out www.rawmotivations.com/breakthrough

  • @cherrybacon3319
    @cherrybacon3319 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    As I kept going back and forwards with him o began to realise that nothing was going to change. When he was asleep or thought I wasn't looking o'd stare at him on an attempt to analyse who or what I was with. I was wishing that things were different but on reality knew they weren't. I'd look at him and try to decide what it was I loved or liked about him, keeping in mind all the cruel and abusive things he'd done to me and wanting to be true to myself I saw nothing good. The only thing good in that room was me. At that point I started to see him and our association for what it was, and I didn't want to be like this for the next 20yrs. I wanted to feel life. Feel relaxed and not on edge. Educating myself on Narcissm with the help of these videos helped me to gain confidence and courage to leave without Reactive abuse, thus giving myself a better chance to be a better person for me before my time on this earth is done. I left. 🍒

  • @pamelakelley5535
    @pamelakelley5535 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    When u educate yourself and realize just how sick these people really are it's a real wake up call. It is shattering that everything was a complete lie not one word was true. U become reactive agressive and learn this is how they get their supply. All this is an awakening that u need to leave them go NC and never allow them back in ur life. Build a new life for yourself do positive things for ur self practice self love.

    • @saintejeannedarc9460
      @saintejeannedarc9460 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I think it depends on how narcissistic and toxic the person was. They are still people, and some of it might have been true in the beginning or early years. They do have a disorder though and they aren't capable of healthy coping mechanisms or going the distance.

    • @cgrcustoms4791
      @cgrcustoms4791 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@saintejeannedarc9460 sounds like you are making excuses for your narc. One day you will have your fill of the batshit craziness and walk away.

  • @foxygayla
    @foxygayla 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    He actually told me I treat you well. I think he believed that was true. When we think no way is anything you're doing good.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hi there I would like to invite you to be a part of this workshop- Use the right tools and discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/meditationmastery

  • @desireef8495
    @desireef8495 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Once you see behind the mask you cant unsee it. It took me a while but now theres literally nothing left now that i have seen the truth, it seems like i just don't have any motivation to continue the relationship.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hi there, have you thought about the next steps you should take in your healing journey? I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

  • @IMTinaMarieJ
    @IMTinaMarieJ ปีที่แล้ว +26

    This explains why my ex got so angry at me when I told him he never loved me cause he was abusive and a cheater. He was more fixated on being validated as “ a good man” than he was in actually owning and correcting his f*cked up behavior

    • @KB-ih5gf
      @KB-ih5gf ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Mine was all about his public image too… and god help me if I “embarrassed” him in public. 🤦‍♀️

    • @aleesharenea1334
      @aleesharenea1334 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Yup. You called him out and unfortunately I'm pregnant by a Man with that personality only cares about being validated.

  • @deekircher21
    @deekircher21 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Look at actions not words
    Standards for yourself
    Protect yourself
    Be ok to be solo by yourself
    Don’t react, just walk away
    Protect your peace
    Protect yourself

  • @SherryONeill
    @SherryONeill ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This Is Exactly What Has Happened To me
    And I am Finally Free!!
    I Did The Work While Still In The Abuse And Deception So It Was An Excellent Weaning Time
    I am Beginning To Have Spits Of Anger But I Quickly ReMind myself It Was All Training
    And I Turn To Messiah And Peace Comes Immediately
    I am Very Excited About What Will Come Of This Victory Over One Of Hells Best Weapons To Destroy Souls
    Thank you Ben For your Work Here On yt For The Last Steps Out
    No More Delusion
    Wooooo HOOOO!!!
    🦅🔥🌹

  • @LoriCadwell
    @LoriCadwell ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Prequalification: when a person makes a statement about their character before it has been questioned

  • @vanessamcbridebreathebelie5468
    @vanessamcbridebreathebelie5468 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    thank you for this explanation

  • @Socoolral
    @Socoolral ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Thank you Ben,
    I know there’s a lot going on inside my head. I do need to move forward. I don’t know what to make of it. I couldn’t even start to explain to you. Well the video hit really deep and thank you. Stay healthy and safe inside your body 😉🤙🏼

  • @flyprincess69
    @flyprincess69 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I knew something was wrong as soon as I ate the Wedding Cake…

    • @saintejeannedarc9460
      @saintejeannedarc9460 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      W/ me it got really bad as soon as we bought the house. Married or commonlaw, that's when they often show you who they are fully.

    • @acd1168
      @acd1168 ปีที่แล้ว

      😮‍💨 That’s deep

    • @fooled_twice4668
      @fooled_twice4668 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      mine refused sex on our wedding night. anyone else on this site get that treatment too? i should have annulled it the next day! but then i wouldn't have my 3 beautiful kids.... oh well. i'm free now, so blessed for that!

  • @kellyhiett
    @kellyhiett ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This is excellent, thank you Ben!

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Your support is truly appreciated, thank you!

  • @ItsSoarTime
    @ItsSoarTime 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    um-huh!! they got skillz...UNTIL...you realize it's allll deception!!!!

  • @Alabamasparra
    @Alabamasparra ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Ben this popped up on facebook so looked oon you tube... love this video!! Keep going, you're saving people the more videos you do and greater insight! I broke free and now have a lovely caring, nice partner. I went through hell and mental torture. Thank you for doing this, telling the truth and standing by the people who you used to harm. There is light but probably one in a million and no one should hope they should go no contact and focus on them and move on if there is no REAL not lying change. Its a biggy the lies to change stay no contact t till proof!! And 99 percent of the time there no hope I'm guessing xx

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You deserve to be treated with kindness, respect, and love. Don't let anyone else's harmful actions or words define your worth or impact your well-being.

  • @tinaacree9283
    @tinaacree9283 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    i heard i’m a good person a million times if your a good person you don’t have to say it

    • @saintejeannedarc9460
      @saintejeannedarc9460 ปีที่แล้ว

      I quickly noticed when on dating sites in the past, the ones will tell you in their profile what a nice guy they are, or who actually put some version of "nice guy" in their profile name, watch out. I never ended up going out w/ any of them, but just in corresponding, or a possible first date, time and again, it's just a red flag.

    • @fooled_twice4668
      @fooled_twice4668 ปีที่แล้ว

      agree 100%! i lost count on how many times my ex said to my kids: "who's the BEST daddy?" (and expected/demanded their reply "YOU ARE!") i wanted to vomit every time. who is "normal" and says crap like this to their kids?

    • @viviankang
      @viviankang หลายเดือนก่อน

      I remember my husband "asked" me a question multiple times after conflicts. " You know I'm a good person right", I used to answer " of course you are". But one day, I just realised I never really know who this man is, So I answered:" actually, I don't know". I could see his facial expression, was in a total shock, and for the first time, he was silenced.

  • @edgreen8140
    @edgreen8140 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Yep, whenever asked for help I throw it back in their face. If needed ; I add not sure you can do it!

    • @mr.cardinal9182
      @mr.cardinal9182 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lol re: help, mine would stand there & watch me struggle with something & when I was done with the hard part & nearly finished they'd ask if I needed help. F that garbage!🤣🤣🤣

  • @curtriedel5036
    @curtriedel5036 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I have the textbook narcissistic relationship. 8 and a half years of pure Bullshit. We are One day before the new year and I'm starting off this NEW YEAR by making it a New Year entirely by getting the F*CK OUT of this F*CKED UP RELATIONSHIP. I've become someone I don't even recognize. I don't like myself,,,I don't like my Life,, I'm Done. Literally EVERYTHING that describes someone like this is what describes what I've been through.

  • @divinelyguided.111
    @divinelyguided.111 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    During the triangulation he told me once I confronted the situation yes I want to be with her!! Now you see this is all fake (him&I) !! That broke me into pieces! Exactly what he wanted!

  • @HeatherColemanVoss
    @HeatherColemanVoss ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Great video, Ben!

  • @rebekahjette6304
    @rebekahjette6304 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Looking forward to this one!

  • @Schquirl
    @Schquirl ปีที่แล้ว +4

    9:10 I literally ran away from my phone as it was playing because I couldn't handle it then when I came back this is what I heard. Yes, I really want to run from the truth it hurts so bad 😭

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Stop running away from the pain, get started on healing, try the 7day challenge for $7

    • @Schquirl
      @Schquirl ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@RawMotivations I'm glad you replied because I can't figure out the app and the website. I've tried for a couple days. I am middle-aged and I feel now tech disabled. Downloaded the app and it said go to the website. What do I do when I get to the website? Thank you

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Schquirl all access to the app goes through signing up on the website. www.rawmotivations.com/narcapp
      We had to modify that to increase security and safety so we could limit if there are toxic people trying to get in.

  • @leticiacampbell9786
    @leticiacampbell9786 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is soooo good.

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Theres nothing he can do im done

  • @jonathanomahony688
    @jonathanomahony688 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Why isn't there a law against these people.
    When you are lied to and conned out of years of your life.
    It was fraud they married you under false pretence.
    It should be a criminal offence in law.

  • @charityhouze647
    @charityhouze647 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This sounds like an overt . Coverts don't do that unless they're going behind ones back and laying ground for destroying a decent person

  • @dawnserrano737
    @dawnserrano737 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This is really too much..no one signs up for it...

  • @isobelle.London
    @isobelle.London ปีที่แล้ว

    This made me realise he was a narcissist. This is exactly what happened to a T

  • @menu7320
    @menu7320 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for sharing your story! Can you direct me to your videos on triangulation? This was used a lot. Thank you.

  • @corythegreat13
    @corythegreat13 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What up Ben

  • @SherryONeill
    @SherryONeill ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Lies,.. oh Yeah
    A Woman mine Went On A Date With Told me he Told her he Had Been Single For THREE YEARS!!
    Haha!
    Married But Single In their Head😂
    Ok
    Single they Are!!

    • @fooled_twice4668
      @fooled_twice4668 ปีที่แล้ว

      omg that's hilarious. i also caught wind of lies my ex had told others. he started rumors about our "divorce" way before i even decided to divorce him, just to "see what other people would say and do" and "when it would get back to him."
      i too learned things from my ex's lovers once they left him: he told one of his mistresses that i was "cold" and never wanted sex, (while in truth, it was always him rejecting me, probably after a day in the sack with her!) among other things. i'm astonished how "cookbook" and predictable all their manipulations are, once you have learned/studied them. i hope all us narc-survivors find truthful reliable wonderful people who can admit to their mistakes and work on growth together.

  • @ninath13
    @ninath13 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I'm starting to hate this B as much as he hate me the more clarity I get

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Omg 😂 thats crazy

  • @livelife5890
    @livelife5890 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Are you still a narcissist? You've mentioned being "self-aware" but I don't think that means much. Have you asked Jesus to save you from your sins and asked His forgiveness? Then repented of narcissism, amongst other sins? Without getting saved......there is NO other way to be delivered from narcissism or any other sinful habit.
    There's a massive difference between resisting sin, and actually not wanting to sin because it hurts God and separates you from Him. Trying to stop a sinful habit by the power of the flesh, will fail. So where are you with what's being asked of you here?

    • @mr.cardinal9182
      @mr.cardinal9182 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Maybe Ben's a Buddhist... or Jewish. Maybe you should just leave your religion out of it... making assumptions that everyone believes what you believe & talking down to them is kinda rude imho.🙄

    • @livelife5890
      @livelife5890 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@mr.cardinal9182 Sin can only be eradicated by Christ. Preaching Jesus will always offend people. In this case it offended you. Come to Jesus as well. He waits for all who will come to Him. Time however does not last forever as we know. Hence time is of the essence.
      Also....my question if he's still a narcissist, is a genuine question. Not talking down to. My "tone" may not seem nice but the question still remains.

    • @mr.cardinal9182
      @mr.cardinal9182 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@livelife5890 who said I was offended? Nobody. Also you didn't specify who all your questions & comments were directed to, so essentially you were talking down to everyone here.

    • @mr.cardinal9182
      @mr.cardinal9182 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@livelife5890 lol my Jesus is very different than yours 😉

    • @SherryONeill
      @SherryONeill ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mr.cardinal9182
      We Have The Freedom To Share our Faith With A Man who Has Been Caught In A Demonic Web That Our Messiah Can Fully Deliver SomeOne From
      You Are Out Of Line And Obviously Threatened By Yahshua
      That Is your Problem
      Stop Bullying Others

  • @larac0
    @larac0 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love your content, but I want to give you unsolicited advice but very well-meaning. Please fix the holes on the wall or put a nice poster covering them.... I find them unappealing and distracting

    • @the_veronica_k
      @the_veronica_k ปีที่แล้ว +3

      lol. I catch myself trying to scrape what looks like 2 dark spots off of my phone screen with each video 🤦‍♀️ Only to remember…oh, it’s his wall, not my phone 😂