Listening To My Stories With Nuance
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 พ.ค. 2023
- I want people to listen to these stories and gain insight into the game development process, but I don't want people to view all of the actors in these stories as either heroes or villains. Please listen with nuance, as most people in these stories made both good and bad decisions, myself included.
- เกม
Unfortunatley we won't find a lot of nuance in internet comments. These stories are fascinating.
Unfortunately* (non-derogatory spelling correction)
@@ZayP730 It's just a misprint. You mad?
These fireside chats feel like such a privilege. Thanks for pushing for nuance in this very black and white internet.
What Fargo did was bad. But from what i learned of Interplay at the time, he was under a lot of stress keeping the company running. By 1998, the financial situation at Interplay was dire, and the company was in bankruptcy court. This led to them going public and eventually being acquired by Titus.
From what you said, it sounds like Fargo was being more of a boss than a leader at the time. But when your financial status is on the line, you tend to make hardline snap choices.
Yeah I'm only speculating but this is probably why he wanted Tim on Fallout 2 in the first place. He didn't like what Fallout 2 was looking like without Tim's help and possibly worried the game would do poorly without him. I still think Fargo handled the situation poorly but I at least sorta understand where he was coming from
That's pretty much exactly what I was thinking. In no way does this excuse some of the things Fargo did, but I imagine when you're at the head of a fairly large company that is rapidly dying and you have a matter of months, weeks, or even days to figure out how to make a miracle happen or you and everyone that works for you is out of a job the pressure is probably tremendous. While I wouldn't blame anyone he wronged if they didn't want to forgive him, and I have no idea what his behavior has been outside of that stretch of time when the Fallout games were in development and Interplay was failing, I do understand why he lashed and took extreme/unnecessary measures to try and right the ship.
People make mistakes, especially under pressure
Back in 2012, Brian Fargo released a Kickstarter pitch video for Wasteland 2. I had never seen the guy before then and knew nothing of Interplay's internal structure, but when I heard him say his name in the video it sounded very familiar.
It only struck me later that it sounded so familiar because his name is just about the first thing you see when you start up Fallout. I had seen 'Brian Fargo presents' countless times since 1997, without really knowing who he was.
Appreciate the nuance when it comes to Brian Fargo (and the cool story that his "presented by" in the Fallout credits was done in homage by the team!). As CEO and financier he's going to make tough choices and ruffle feathers. But the marketing person who said Fallout 2's campaign art, etc. "has been decided" without your input - no way to look at that as anything but b.s.!
For anyone who doubts Tim’s insight, I’d say it mirrors my own. Brian did wonderful things, and did some not so wonderful things. I tend to not go into them because I don’t want to go into the long story of it all, and there’s little point to it in the end. I have discussed some of these things publicly, but never with names attached - the whole “you are expected to have no life at all and work all your waking hours without direct compensation because you love it that much and there’s somebody else dying to replace you if you don’t” attitude, which still plagues the industry. The excuse is that Hollywood requires that level of absorption and dedication. But Hollywood has *unions*, and rules, and regulations, and compensation. There is no designer listed on Swords and Serpents, because it was demanded that the designer’s name be chiseled off the stone obelisk for all eternity because Brian was mad at him for something (of which I draw no judgment, for or against, or take sides in, because, it isn’t black and white and I am not privy to the whole story). So Paul O’Conner was taken off - in Hollywood, he could have that reviewed and I’m 100% sure that his name would have been restored as designer. At the same time, Brian Fargo would usually accept my advice on listing people he had directly fired (or had me fire). Or did more than their job title. So, it’s not black and white. I wouldn’t take full credit as the sole designer on S&S - I thought it wrong, and against my own advice to myself, I chose not to be listed as designer, either. So - it was a game without a designer. I suppose that I didn’t like the game had a lot to do with it, and wasn’t given enough time to rewrite the game to my own standards.
But anyway, good to hear your tales. Wasteland for me was a similar experience to your Fallout. At a certain point, I realized I had day-to-day control of the game, and could pretty much add what I thought was needed in the way or stories and encounters, delete which sucked, and that was good preparation for Star Trek: 25th Anniversary, where I would write, design, edit, do animations, and select the music as needed. But at the same time - I learned that from Brian, who pitched in on Bard’s Tale III and designed the mass of creature encounters in a single “ass of iron, I ain’t moving until this is done” session.
Thanks Bruce. I knew my experiences weren’t unique, but I don’t want to speak for others. I think we all had our ups and downs in this business.
I'm a historian and archaeologist, and I particularly enjoy the point you are making. I try and apply the same lesson to my classes, my research, and my daily life. I don't always succeed, but I love the reminder from someone who has helped make a great many games that I love. Thank you stranger and have an awesome day!
don't say you're old Tim, you've just ripened well
That is SO much worse :D
I loved that your Enclave for Fallout 2 was building a spaceship since it tracts with the true purpose behind the vault experiments.
All straight roads are bent after Fallout.
I love that idea too. It’s gives a true purpose to the vault experiments beyond just a cartoonishly evil corporation
People really have no chill. They hear a story about a workplace conflict that happened 20 years ago and immediately want to start drama.
I got a bit angry at Brian Fargo with the last video, I won't lie about that. But it's important to remember that we don't have the full picture, and that it was such a long time ago that even he could have changed his leadership style since then. Good to see that Tim is following that other video up to make sure that people are aware of this too.
Hi Tim! I’m leading a very new and very inexperienced game development studio and I just wanted to say how grateful I am for these videos. There’s a number of pitfalls studio leads seem to regularly fall into and I think the information you’re presenting is invaluable not only for avoiding those same errors, but also highlighting little things that work really well. I started taking notes like you do today and it’s already helped me break out of the brainfreeze that too much untethered information often cements me into, and get back into a robust workflow. Really looking forward to hearing and learning more of what you have to say. I hope Outer Worlds 2 is on par with New Vegas, my brother and I are really excited for it!
Much love,
Dim
You're a very interesting person and most people watch this channel because of YOU and your personal experiences, not just game development tips. So when we get a story about you getting repeatedly punished for making the best rpg of its decade, we get that "Wow, these Interplay people suck" kind of feeling.
It also sucks that people watching you take things too far or get the wrong idea of how things went down though, these guys were normal people that were trying to do their jobs and get that paycheck at the end of the day. I can imagine how weird it must have been for your boss to be like "I just got the goddamn D&D License for them, what the hell are they doing playing around with that weird project?!" and it's a totally understandable reaction from his point of view.
Personally, I'm very interested in what working for Interplay was like, specially working with those quiet powerhouses that you've mentioned before.
I know people have been saying this since you started uploading these videos, but I just wanted to throw in my two cents and say thank you. Hearing you talk about Fallout is like hearing the Beatles talk about making an album. It's truly a revelatory and rewarding experience.
I went to college to study video game art, and the parallels between 'expressions of timeless emotional context worthy of whole museums' and games was beyond the scope of our studies. Rather, we focused on how games could be like cars, crafted at pace following pipelines, iterative and sculpted by profit. Somewhere in that, maybe, is an expression.
You went college to study game art? Wow...
Watching you and Leonard talking to Game Informer before Outer Worlds' launch made have an immense amount of respect for you guys. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.
I don’t think anyone at that time went into video games to be filthy rich so everyone involved had to have some level of passion about their role and work done. We all view the world through our own lens. Interestingly that nuance is often reflected in games you worked on. Thanks for sharing.
I would love to hear some stories about your time working on Pillars, if you have any good ones! (Especially the advantages/disadvantages of Kickstarter)
That’s really interesting. As someone who has been in similarly difficult professional situations, I thought these were good stories where you tried to solve difficult problems with an eye towards integrity and ethics. The moral of the Fallout 2 story isn’t that someone did a petty thing - it’s that Interplay could have had a very happy Tim Cain working on Fallout 2 if they had 1) let you do something else first, 2) made a reasonable timeline, and 3) paid you the bonus they owed you. Anyone aspiring to work in games at any level should understand that behaving ethically and with integrity is a necessary habit, not just for your own sake but for the sake of the people you work with as well.
I love social media, but there are so many people who look at everything in life as either black or white. The stories that you are telling is based on your thoughts and feelings, and no one can tell you that you are "wrong". I have learned that some people on the internet are too far gone, and It doesn't matter what you say because they refuse to accept that they might be wrong. Keep up the good work!!
Everybody makes mistakes. What's important is how one learns and grows from said mistakes. Taking responsibility and attempting to do better in the future has a huge, huge impact on the people around us.
Speaking for myself, i feel like the situation with brian fargo is frustrating. Mainly because it seems like his bad decision caused you to leave and this really affected the course of the franchise. Makes me wonder how things would have gone if you hadn't left
Nuance is something that's sadly lacking nowadays.
You have no idea how much I appreciate your tales. I really hope the not-so-nuanced comments don't discourage you from sharing more. There's a lot of shiny success stories out there in gaming, as well as some horrific failure stories, but the more nuanced and grey stories you've been sharing are much fewer and farther between so your channel has been an absolute breath of fresh air.
So very true Tim. It is so easy to think of these stories as just stories, not realizing there is a difference between fiction and something that actually happened. People are complex, you can spend an entire lifetime truly getting to know a single person. One shouldn't think they can get a read on someone based on an anecdote.
Just caught this as uploaded and I wanted to say thank you for your videos.
They have given me a great insight into the industry from someone who has lived through it, I hope you keep making these because I am loving them.
Thank you for this. I even felt unhappy towards some people in your stories and this has really made me sit back and think
Honestly I think this video has taught an additional lesson on life as a whole, the world itself is full of nuance, people sometimes only see what they want to see, and other times people don't get to see the greater picture.
Nuance is something that I think comes with maturity and some viewers maybe just don't have it yet. Love your stories Tim!
Timothy, I know this would sound oddly specific but I think it would be really interesting to hear about your experience with other known entities in game industry - whether you worked together or not. Like you and Chris Avellone both worked on Fallout 2 and South Park, with Josh Sawyer on Pillar of Eternity, maybe you met Warren Spector! Stuff like that could be really exciting to hear.
The choices you make in the moment will be analyzed for years.
I would love to hear even more about Arcanum, I have really enjoyed that game so much. I would love to hear more about the development and pitfalls and short comings around it.
Hello and thank you for my happy and weird childhood in Russia and now in Indonesia- you are the person who really impacted my initial contact with RPG and I am thankful forever after. Thank you Timothy! I've been following your games even though I didn't know it was you in Arcanum, Vampire Masquerade and other masterpieces. Thank you- you've really impacted a lot of weird kids))
As someone starting out in the industry (2 years in to engine programming) it is so nice hearing from people who have dedicated their career to it, especially from such a good communicator 👍
I didn't see the comments you mention, but it's very refreshing to hear you bring these kinds of details to light! Life is all about nuance, and it's so important to recognize (not necessarily judge) the good and bad coming from each side, because that's how we grow as people and as collectives.
It's a great reminder that the world is not filled with villains and heroes, but simply flawed humans under various forms of pressure and at different stages of self-improvement!
I am so glad, that i stumbled across this channel in the depth of youtube. Between the billion terabytes of trash, there are still gems to find. Thank you for your stories.
Everyone involved in these stories is human, and all humans make mistakes. Including you, including Brian. To own your mistakes and failures is to take control of them and that's the first step to real change. Brian now would likely say he'd of done x or y differently. You've probably got your own list of things you wish you'd done differently. I'm grateful to hear these stories, and I make no judgements about the person alone.
I love Fallout 2. The Temple of Trials is the worst part of it to me, I don't think Brian is a bad person for that, but I do wish we'd of had the choice to skip it. You're a hero of mine, Tim, thanks for showing us this humble side of you! Your videos are the brightest part of my morning, take care.
Love it, trying to see nuance is something I do in my daily life, to try to see different perspectives as much as possible because nothing is ever black and white.
This is excellent, lack of nuance in our thinking and discourse is at the root of almost all of our modern societal ills. Wonderful that you did this follow-up. I love the good things Brian did then, and many since, and even though yes he did some bad things too, I know that all people in leadership make bad decisions and do ugly things some of the time, they are human and are under incredible stresses. One of my best friends has been my boss several times, and though often he was amazingly wonderful, he also did some awful things too. It wasn't his intention to harm me, but it just happened. Life is messy and hard, best to just keep moving forward to better and better things. But I'm glad Tim stood up for himself, we all ought to be brave and do that!
I appreciate this talk. Even with people that you've had issues with, you acknowledge that at the end of the day, they're people. I appreciate it.
I think the stories are super insightful and interesting, I love all the videos and stories
And I’m super happy you read the comments and take them into consideration, but TH-cam being how it is, there’s not gonna be a lot of nuance in the comment section lol
Point is, happy you’re making these videos and telling these stories, Tim.
I have been thinking / felling this for a while now. You seem a very gentle person Tim. I would like to be gentler. What has your experience been with being a gentle person in a position of leadership? I find it often very difficult to be gentle, not because I don’t care, but because I find it very difficult to be nice when I must do hard things. Maybe it’s silly of me, but I often wonder if I have become too calloused over time. I find it painful when I become to invested in a specific team, so I tend towards being more distant. I don’t get this feeling from you.
I feel that the projects, games or otherwise, that I work on are under such constraints that I must do hard things a lot of the time. I don’t like it, but it is what it is. What do you do when you have to do hard things? How do you do it? I feel compassion is seldom the option I take, and I despise it.
Could you share some examples from your experience on hard situations and how you delt with them?
Best Wishes,
SNACV
I find it really heartwarming, that the hero of my teenage gaming reads my comments, especially on Fallout which was such a big deal for me, I had a custom Vault 13 t-shirt made back in the day and I was probably the only one in this small city who took things so far. Even after years, I still think about Fallout a lot, I listen to its ambient music when I sleep (I just load a save in a place I want to listen to and let the game run all night) and I seek Fallout related videos. I don't know if this is healthy or not, but I don't have problems in my social life because of it, so I guess I am okay. I just want to tell you how much your games mean to me for all these years. It is hard to say with words, it's a spot inside my heart. Thank you so much for being here and making things even better after all the years
I subbed to you about 5 minutes ago, Tim, and I love the technical detail and backstory in your videos. I hope you keep up on uploading knowledge. You're not old. You're seasoned.
Man i live your down to earth honesty. Rare attribute. People catgorize honesty as a disadvantage and not an advantage these days.
I can't get enough of these videos, please keep sharing your experience with us!
Health man, health is important.
Workplaces and decisions don't have to be perfect but healthy.
Hey Tim. Looks like you've got some free time. I wish I'd sat in more meetings with you during original Fallout dev at Interplay. 🤔🤐
Im really glad you're making these videos, its important to document what we can and its always interesting to hear the designers tell their stories
I'm loving this series. I look forward to watching each day. I really appreciate how it's just you talking to the camera. No fancy editing tricks or anything needed.
Nuance, never met her! 😂
I would love to hear more about Arcanum etc, if you want to discuss it. I love that game to bits and finally finished it last year after first picking it up twenty years earlier 😮
Really enjoying all of these stories Tim. I'm looking forward to them every day! :)
Thanks for making these videos they are an important look into the past of game development Tim :)
It is always easy to see a person's best or worst moments and judge their entire being on that. Thanks for adding some insight to temper those habits. Nobody is perfect.
I will say you seem like a dream manager though. I'm sure you weren't perfect either, but your overall values of being flexible with your employees and allowing them to do things their own way to some extent is something many managers find difficult, at least that I've found. And your acceptance that everyone makes mistakes, and shouldn't be punished if it was in good faith, is something that I think many managers could use a lesson in to be more effective. Also you know firsthand how bad crunch is.
Seriously thanks for sharing a lot of these lessons, they are not only fun to hear but also can teach people a lot about how they can approach their own jobs better.
Love the insight at 7:20 - I wish more people recognise it. Thanks for this channel Tim, Fallout 1-2 was a big reason why I learned English in the first place and it's great to hear about the people behind it.
I remember the day when a Skyrim milestone build came to test and during the smoke test I realized we have something special.
>smoke test
what was that?
@@BladePocok A smoke test for our team was who ever came in first after the morning compile build from the release engine (Or when ever an emergency mid day build was needed).
It a first initial check of the game for this instance to see if it is stable enough to be adopted it as the build for the daily test checks.
What we check?
We tend to look at base game features, if the start of the game is available that part and make a save so we can propagate to the other team and check any current known issue that were observed in the prior smoke tests as a regression pass. I also loaded the editor and did some test in that since the devs need a working in parity editor to the build.
Ever since I found your channel I've been tuning into every upload you do. Thank you so much for sharing your experience working on or working with the people that created some of my favorite games growing up.
Hey, late to the show on this video but got here via the algorithm (Why I left Fallout 2, in case you're curious) and just wanted to say I appreciate this video.
I'm pushing 40, grew up on Fallout, F2, Arcanum. All special to me. I've appreciated your insight into the industry and games that I love but this hits video differently.
This was a video in which you were trying to share *wisdom*. Real, earned wisdom that can help people, peers and youth alike, can grow and learn from. That's something that can help random people more than you know. Thanks for the great games and for being a solid human being.
Lookin forward to climbing up this backlog of content on your channel!
I feel pretty burnout lately, these little passionate chats are like inspiration injections right in my veins! Thank you Tim!
these videos are absolutely incredible tim, thank you as always
Thank you so much for sharing! Have been binge watch every one of your stories and I abusolutely love them. There are definitely a lot to learn from the past.
This is such a great video. People are quick to judge without any knowledge of the situation at all. Awareness of this is absolutely important.
Thank you for sharing your stories. And even MORE, thank you for this video reminding us all to avoid the temptation to reduce complex real-life situations into simple hero-and-villain narratives.
These videos are so insightful. Thank you so much for your videos, Tim!
I love all of the videos you’ve put out.
Keep it up!
I doubt I’ll have a career in game development, but all of your videos fuel my creative writing and reminds me that the creative process for any form of art is just as great as or even wilder than the art itself.
hi tim, thanks for these awesome and insightful vids. i was born in 01. i played fallout in 13 and to this day it is one of my fav games of all time. these vids are awesome because you provide so much useful and helpful perspective on your experience working with people in collaborative settings. as a young man looking to work with people im glad to have your perspective :)
Hey Tim, I found your channel yesterday and watched most of your videos already, very interesting stuff. I was wondering if you could talk more about some of the behind the scenes for Arcanum. I always loved the concept behind a fantasy setting tackling the industrial revolution and how it would interact with magic. Thanks for making these videos, they are great.
Я считаю, что «Brian Fargo presents” в начале Fallout это благодарность за помощь в настоящем спасении игры. Это дань уважения одному из создателей Wasteland. Это было честное признание в любви к его творчеству. Решения могут быть приняты разные, но в итоге вы хотите одного. Игру в которую будет интересно играть и вам и игрокам“By gamers for gamers”)
At the same time, there should be nuance in the expectations from the comments. I am, and I am sure many others aren't, aspiring game developers. Many of us are just people who love games. I also love history. These stories, for me, are entertainment. I am listening to your ideas and digesting them, but... I don't think I will ever develop a game. Maybe, using Unity, but, as a writer, I can write and make videos and do other big exciting projects that tell the sort of stories I might have put into a video game without relying on so many other people.
I hope none of my comments make you feel embarrassed for me for my lack of insight. Thanks for making these videos. I am learning a lot about a way of thinking that has already influenced me and this gives me a chance to go back and reflect. And that's fun. It's fun for human beings to learn new things, especially about things we are interested in.
Im enjoying these short form forays into your experiences and thoughts Tim.
I just love your work. Fallout was the most influential game I have ever played in my life and is a game that I come back to now and then when I miss playing something good. Now I can understand better how Fallout 2 never clicked for me.
I hope to one day see a real Fallout revival, with an isometric camera and compelling tactic rpg fights
You are very charismatic, Love you Tim!:)🤍❤🤍
Thank you for this channel, i've been playing fallout since 1999, i was 13 years old and became my favorite all time universe and you brcame one of my idols, also i loved arcanum, you are one of my heores Tim
What a time we live in. I grew up on all these games and it's amazing to hear the stories behind them. Thank you Tim
Context and nuance are both key when discussing anything that happened in the past, whether it was 20 years ago or 200 years ago. We need to keep in mind where a person is coming from when viewing their actions, beliefs, and culture.
Really enjoying the videos/stories. Super entertaining and interesting!
It's shame you had to clarify, but it's wonderful that you can/did. Thanks!
Id love to hear more stories about you and Leonard, yall are a dynamic DUO
Your wish is about to come true
Thank you so much for the videos!
These videos are gold nuggets, please never stop 😂
Hey Tim, you going to do any stories on Arcanum? And when can we expect Arcanum 2?!?!?!?! :P If ever there was a CRPG that needed a sequel!!! Loved that game, man!
I agree with the premise of the video, however I think (and I include myself on this one) most of the complains about Fargo's actions were time specific and not something broad enough. What I mean is that from what I've seen only a fiew people actually changed their opinions on him after hearing the story, and those are the ones that value impact over the wide spectrum in the picture.
In my case I know he was in a kinda hard position at a bloated Interplay, the fact that he wasn't 100% capable of dealing with huge chunks of workforce and that the company was going to be public at some point due to the financial handicaps, so when the reasons why you left came thru I wasn't surprised nor mad at the guy. Like I said he did took a wrong turn by doing this at your back, but I understand his position so is a 50/50.
The devil is in the details, so says the phrase, and those are the elements that should elevate a final conclusion (specialy over people) instead of the "shock factor" of the stories that come thru.
With the bonus thing, Tim was basically told it would work one way and then it worked another. He's also right; punishing him by reducing his bonus, as a surprise, was a really bad call that no normal person would find motivating. Assuming one trusts Tim, nothing we've been told or that I can see is available through other sources makes it seem like he or the team deserved this weird stick punishment type stuff.
That doesn't make Brian EVIL but it does make him wrong.
I would like that more companies cared about platform independent games from the ground up. Mostly of what we get nowadays are games locked to just Windows or console game ports that perform very poorly.
Brian Fargo- like any of us- is a human being. The man definitely did not make all the best choices, but nobody in leadership positions ever does. The work culture of the US at large and specifically the games industry is certainly not built in a way in which compensation for labor or rights around employment are chief priorities. And for leaders who want to run a tight ship, sometimes the pressure is coming from a place you cannot see or know. The thought that there’s a game-breaking release-delaying issue with a game and you as a leader *cannot* pinpoint exactly where the mistake was made, could be a huge issue with his ability to secure investor financing or whatever the hell else a guy in his position needs to do. I still firmly believe it was a terrible choice to “punish” anybody for a honest to goodness mistake, but it makes more sense to look at it from this angle.
Thank you for sharing!
Words of great wisdom here!
nice to have new video, have a good day Tim
the heroes and villains mentality makes talking about behind the scenes stuff so hard to do. I wanna hear interesting and candid stories about game development, not put Feargus Urquhart up before a gamers' tribunal for crimes against gamers in 1997
I think "gamers" want to believe devs are all buddies and pals, and forget it's still company work. I don't condone being yelled at by a boss, but I've had that happen to me at jobs before. A co-worker of mine who left the library that I work at, recently opened up about butting heads with her boss, and yet, she doesn't hate them, even recognizing that they approach work very differently. Even mild mannered librarians can and will get heated over things. Work, especially when it gets stressful, sucks. Feargus is hardly a boogieman, and considering how some go after him, it's a bit much. Much of this is exasperated thanks to the reactionary tendency of current social media. People need to relearn critical thinking, and not be so quick to judge.
Had to laugh as soon as I saw the title of this, following after the previous video. Necessary points.
Hey Tim, love the content. Curious on some of the direct inspirations for fallout 1, and who they came from on the team! I know there’s plenty online discussing these topics, and some more obvious ones like The Road Warrior, but I wanted to hear directly from an original creator! Would love to see a video on this.
I think Tim read the Codex thread :D (Keep them coming Tim)
It also just seems like Interplay had a lot going on at the top. Their wikipedia page has whole swaths of bankruptsy/ligitation so it probably wasn't the best time and place for a passion project given free reign anyway. Yet that also has it's own complicated story with different actors involved.
Really enjoying just listening! Thanks for sharing! Were you ever involved in any of the Star Trek stuff? If not, would you enjoy it?
Business is business. Don't want want to give out a bonus... Don't want stay for a year of crunch after being shorted on a bonus... it's all business.
Doesn't make someone bad or good.
Tim could you talk a bit about the outer worlds? i felt its came out a bit mediocre and bare bones, that my opinion, i know people liked it, but I have a feeling obsidian were holding back when making it, is it true? what do you think of how the game came out, and would you change anything?
Tim you mention the three objective numbers in games and how they have no correlation. What I would like to know, is whether creators know during the process is what they are making is good, or great? Do they know when they are making a stinker? Or is it only once the game goes to market that you find out? This aspect of a creative process fascinates me.
Thank you for this follow up. I think you did present Brian Fargo well, not just a black and white character. That is why it hurt even more the way he treated you (why is it such a cliché?).
Seeing nuance in things is a near extinct skill
I've been wary of Fargo before your story, but it is another piece of the puzzle. I have a question, was there an actual policy that whoever is responsible for a deadline being blown gets his bonus cut? Because I have a feeling that Fargo was arbitrary in his leadership style, and you saying that "sometimes he was very nice" fits into this picture. Arbitrary rewards and arbitrary punishments are what makes someone a bad leader.