Phil In The Blanks | Episode 175 | Full Episode | Malignant & Communal Narcissist pt 4
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 มิ.ย. 2023
- Spot A Malignant and Communal Narcissist, Pt. 4 - ‘Phil In The Blanks’ Podcast - Episode 175
On his Phil in the Blanks podcast, Dr. Phil continues his discussion about malignant narcissism, which combines narcissistic, Machiavellian, and psychopathic traits. Dr. Phi explains that malignant narcissists are dangerous and will use and abuse others for their own gain, and why you should get out of relationships with a malignant narcissist as swiftly and safely as possible. - บันเทิง
I would love you to talk about a malignant narcissistic mother and the damage they do to the children even into there adulthood I have finally gone no contact on my mother in fact all 4 of us have there it no limit to here cruelty mind you I’m 53 years old. Thank you.
I talked to a lawyer about holding a malignant narcissist accountable (that I dated for about 5 months until I recognized gaslighting) for stealing thousands of dollars of wormy chestnut lumber from me. The loss was the sentimental value since it was from a shed torn down on property with a house I bought when I was 20. My brother had stored it for me for 45 years until he died. The lawyer told me to let it go as you don't mess with this kind of person because this particular one could afford a hit man. I have accepted that this lumber is only a material thing and it is gone. However, I am concerned about this retired pastor financially and possibly physically hurting other women. He is rewarded by wealth and respect among powerful people in the community. Research I have done advises to go silent and stay away - Karma will step in - but it is my own soul that I am worried about. I feel there should be some kind of registry for narcissists, especially since they are all over social media and dating sites where they are in fertile hunting grounds. Perhaps sites such as these and facebook could watch for stalking and offer upfront education. We had a few of the same female friends on facebook. He searched through their friends and posts and found me (I later learned) - then showed up at one of my public poetry readings posted. It has been six months of recovery when not a single day goes by that I don't research so thank you for widening the knowledge. I had no idea that such a person existed. Now, I reinforce daily how to recognize and avoid them in the future.
a pastor!? oh yes, karma will get him, it's called eternal hell. the lowest. there are anonymous sites to out people, i've heard of them but not sure what or where they are. problem is these people never get diagnosed, it works for them! i wish we could force fMRI scans to be able to prove what they are and legally put them on a list, as you say.
Tell your story, and do not be afraid of anyone. As long as it’s true, you can tell everybody the truth about anything that happened. Keep your head up high, my mom had to deal with some pretty nasty stuff. Experience is the teacher. You’re better prepared now.
@@FacesintheStoneI disagree. Life can be made pretty much worthless by such a person. If a person decides to fight such a person then they must be willing to lose absolutely everything.
I was robbed thousands from one too, their main job because not qualified for anything is Con-artist!
2. RELOCATE & FLY UNDER THE RADAR FOR 6 MONTHS TO 1 YEAR AND STAY FAR AWAY FROM HIM AND IFF SOCIAL MEDIA OR! 3. INVEST IN A PROTECTION DOG FROM A HIGHLY REPUTABLE PROTECTION AGENCY BC "HE THREATENED TO KILL YOU " AND "HE WILL KILL YOU IF HE GETS THE OPPORTUNITY "?! YET OVER 4 YRS LATER & I'M STILL ON THE DV HOUSING LIST; THEY CAN'T TELL YOU WHERE U R BC IT'S CASE BY CASE BASIS... GE HAS CHOKED ME TO THE POINT U WAS LOSING CONSCIOUSNESS & MY FIGHT SIGNAL KICKED IN AND I WAS ABLE TO FLIP THE SCRIPT & I BLACKED OUT. I CAME AROUND WHEN I HEARD HIM BEGGING ME TO STOP BC I WENT BAZERK DUE TO MY PTSD BEING STUCK IN FIGHT OR FLIGHT. U THINK HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN LOCKED UP THAT NIGHT THE COO RETURNED JUST TO BASICALLY TELL ME TO FLEE WHILE HE'S IN CUSTODY TONIGHT??? THEY SHOULD HAVE TO PAY THE VICTIM RESTITUTION FOR THE MIND EFFING , TRAUMA, STALKING, HARASSMENT, TRACKING DEVICES ON MY CAR AND PHONE, ETC... OVER 4 YRS LATER & IM HOMELESS, LIVING IN THE SAME AREA BC HE TOOK EVERYTHING OF MINE AND GIVES ZERO EFFS... I AM NOT NEW TO TRAUMA, UNFORTUNATELY & I AM NOTICING THAT MY BOUNCE BACK ISN'T AS EZ AS IT WAS BEFORE... DX INCURABLE FORM OF NONHODGKINS LYMPHOMA & MY DAUGHTER HAS AN AUTOIMMUNE CONDITION AND AHE MOVES WUTH A FRIEND IN ANOTHER STATE... HOW DO I GET THE DAMN HELP I NEED BC I'M AT MY BREAKING POINT AND I FEEL BETRAYED BY LAW ENFORCEMENT, COURT SYSTEM, ETC... I NEED A MASTER RESET ON MY SYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM AND DENTAL IMPLANTS AS A RESULT OF THE EFFECTS OF MASSIVE STEROIDS AS A PART OF MY CHRNL & ANTIBODY INFUSIONS... I ASK MYSELF; WAS THE CHEMO WORTH IT? I AM NOT CONVINCED MY LIFE WAS "SAVED" FOR NOW. I FEEL LIKE I WAS HIT BY AN F5 TORNADO... BOTH WILL COME BACK FOR ROUND 2 OF CANCER & ROUND DBL DIGITS FOR HE POS... I CUT TIES WITH MY TOXIC FAMILY AND FRIENDS 4YRS AGO AND NOW THEY'RE SENDING DEAT GHB THREATS VIA DISAPPEARING APP BY OLDEST SISTER'S HUSBAND WGO RAPED AND BEAT MY SISTER 3 YRS OLDER AND ME AFTER OUR FATHER DIED & MY OLDEST SISTER STAYED BY HIM AND BLAMED A 12 YR OLD & 15 YR OLD... NOW SHE'S IN CAHOOTS WITH MY EX NOW ON A SMEAR CAMPAIGN... IM A SITTING DUCK. DR. PHILL... PLEASE HELP ME TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE & GOD WILLING DENTAL IMPLANTS SO I DON'T FACE DISFIGUREMENT FROM BONE LOSS... THAT'LL BE THE END OF ME. COPS CALL ME METH HEAD AND LAUGH BC I'M HOMELESS AND SAY I'M WEIRD. I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH LONGER ALONE. 🙏 HELP ME VIA ADVICE, THROWING YOUR WEIGHT AROUND TO GET PPL TO LITE A FIRE UNDER THEIR A$$ TO HELP ME OR IT'S GOING TO END BADLY FOR ME... HONESTY, I FEEL LIKE A LOST CAUSE... UM GETTING SO PISSED OFF BC IT'S KILLING ME NORE THAN THE CANCER DIAGNOSIS.
I just quit my job bc of a woman just like this. She made my life horrible. Not to mention,nahe thought she was the best and never wrong. Never apologizes. She. Changes the subject when u bring up something and make sure it turns around back on you where it's your fault. She couldn't control me. It's darn right abuse. Thank God I'm out. These kinda people are Snakes.
After working 15 years with mostly men I would rather work by myself than with women 😂 (female)
Wow, by the book... not many give you a clear strategy as to how to deal with them... Still trying to find out if Dr Phill has one
Slimy grimy snakes
Big hugs so so sorry ❤
Vampires who such you empty.
I was recently kicked out of a “Christian Assembly”. The “Shepherd “ leader is a woman who is extremely articulate, well educated, and seemed to be quite mature in the Word. However, I discovered she could never be wrong. She would talk circles around me, I would get flustered, and I would eventually agree with her just to keep the peace. It finally dawned on me that she was the center of all things, not Jesus. I was in this group chat for 2 months and eventually sent her a text that was quite direct in telling her my observations. I told her we need to talk! She called me names and said I was no longer welcome. Thank you Dr. Phil. I feel so much better after hearing who I was dealing with. It takes a great deal of the sting out.
I was once in a Christian divorce support group. The leader was a narcissist. At the time I was so clueless about these things. Anyway I finally got my eyes opened when he flung the F word out in a meeting he was leading because someone disagreed with his approach with something and it turned into an hour of crazy with all of us poor divorced folks trying to “help”. H I remember shyly making a comment to try to encourage him and he clearly told me I was never a friend of his. I was really hurt and confused. Sheesh! Twenty years later, this explains that person
Most of those people are out of my life now, or they are at a distance. I was turned into a hollowed-out person with a crushed soul over time. I am alone now working through all this. No more broken promises, exploitation, lying, degradation, shaming, emotional blackmail, demanding, and draining people in my life. This ruined my health and I will have to deal with this myself. These people never intended to give anything back to me no matter what I may have been up against. It's pretty much a one-way street with these people. All going out, nothing coming back. It appears it took me almost all my life to figure this out.
I am also by myself trying to recover from what you described. Don’t beat yourself up too much that it took a while to figure this out. It really started with all the social networking, selfies, etc. Poison ☠️. They can ALWAYS find someone on line that can validate their bad behavior that of course they lie about ! My 31 year old daughter took me for a fool, again, for the millionth time leaving me in tatters. I keep falling for the BS and them WHAM, she moves on if she doesn’t get her way. Thousands of dollars later, at 64, I’m done. Enough is enough. I gotta let her fall !!! It hurts, but time heals all. Thank God I have my spirituality - she’s into sorcery. Opposite roads 🕊️ ( I’m no push over either)
So informative. I was married to the poster boy for malignant narcissists. Best advice is to run as hard as possible from the mandatory NEVER look back. Thank you Dr. Phil for these videos. Look forward to them.
I'm sure you know you aren't alone. 21 years and out of it for 6 and absolutely No Contact.. It's possible to find love with an actual human being again. I did - but I had to do a lot of "work" on me first. I hope you are finding life truly joyful and satisfying now.
I’m just now going through a similar situation.. I’ve been married for 15 years to the exact same thing,., and I knew from the start that there was some thing just wasn’t quite right but the love bombing , fog.. took me in completely n I fell hard!.. never had a man who wanted to take care of me…just say now, I sure do wish I wouldn’t have stayed in it for so long.’ I finally came to the point where I had to confront him about a relationship he’d been having for at least three years I knew f and was giving her like §1,500.00, plus money whenever she snapped her fingers!… I had known about it n more, but I just let it go. Kept it to myself’. told no one, until the day I just couldn’t keep it in any longer., guess what,,, I never saw his face again. He went n filled for a complete and absolute divorce within 30 days. N the grounds aren’t even true., he’s completely sneaked my name, went no contact order went so far to have me arrested and he wasn’t even home nor anywhere near our farm property and hone on the farm. My lawyer was the one who told me to get out there and take pictures of the equipment because I’m not familiar with how much their is , and he didn’t want him moving things around hiding it so that he could screw me over through the divorce,, well got my pics’. Arrested! Now a record n want mention that he shut ny new truck down through the onstar guardian app,. Had his cousin get out there to the farm before he works for him on the farm,, I didn’t interact with him because he’d put that in the papers as well,,, no talking to any of his family or servants. Guess no one really wants to hear all of this stuff,,,,, just god bless all victims of the narcissistic abuse,,,, especially those who experience the discrard.
I’ve been there too. Stay safe and hope you can heal!
Dr. Phil they keep saying things to me outside I hear GET OUT or COVE or SECURE or CALL POLICE or MAKE A REPORT or it's THE DEVIL thank you Father. I hear they want to Sexually Assault me & they follow me around & laugh & make fun of me on the radio. I downloaded a lot of pictures of my son onto my phone for printing for days now I'm trying to call me son an Atheist or his Dad a Pastor they never answer. There picture from Whatsapp is not there anymore & it brings & rings & no answer. They have me worried all the time. They mention harsh things about my son. My neighbor which is in the bedroom next door was crying so hard begging saying he can't do this no more to please spare his son he already lost everything he had & it's sounded so real I had to bang on his door because he wouldn't shut up so manager had to calm him down later today we caught up in the shared bathroom he took a shower I asked him about his son & he said he didn't have one. I said well you messed me up dude you got good acting skills I said because you got real into it I said I hope when you have a son or daughter that nothing would happen to them because I can't play this game you play even if it's an act really affects me because I don't know when there playing or not 😭
Doctor Phil’s opening comment really hit home. The Dark Triad Narc that was in my life, was a Ex Port Authority Police Sargent. He would have burned down the whole world if it gave him what he desired. Be vigilant of all the people of authority who you have a relationship with.
I would love for you to address “co-parenting” with a malignant narcissist and domestic abuse by proxy.
There is no such thing as co parenting with these cretins. Not a parent. Not even human😮
I agree with you Alyson, this is still a sore spot with me.
My soon to be ex-husband would not allow me to parent. He would tell me to mind my own business 😮
Wouldn't even let the kids get close to me.
He was jealous, because he knew I was able to form a strong bond with them. Which is something he could not do without lying about me. Once again he has turned them against me, even though they are 30 years old. I'm just praying and waiting for the light to go on, and they see him for who he really is.
A dark triangle... I for one think of the Bermuda triangle, once you get in there it's extremely difficult to not be lost 💔 😭 He would sabotage anything and everything that got in his way.
A huge rectal orifice😅.
I'm on the waiting list at legal aid to have my divorce finalized. I've been working on it since November of 2012. 😶
Insert long explanation here 😂
❤Thank God for the gentle healing that He's bringing me through right now❤
And thank you Dr. Phil for all of this information.
You're so very helpful 😊
💛AGAPE 💛
I went through this. It is devastating and destructive to the spouse and also to the children. Education is vital.
Assume no good is real.
They will use the kids to create an image, lie to u, weaponize kids, etc
They will make you look like you’re bad.
Expect the worst when you are no longer serving their needs.
Expect zero regard for well being of kids or their development.
Understand that your children can’t help but imitate and this will be painful.
Get support and do your best.
I’ve been going through this.
Blessings.
I’ve been were you are my best advice is don’t ever say a negative word about them in front of them they will grow up and figure it out for themselves my children are in their 30s now and they see what a POS their father really is it’s so hard to hear them come home and tell all the shit said about you but you know the truth and they will figure it out trust me been there done that I seen the movie and know how it ends good luck sweetheart it’ll be the hardest thing to watch it was for me but now I get to be friends with them and he never will
Wow! My husband constantly had a higher skin temperature all the time and constantly needed the airconditionier on in winter. Oh dear! He has every trait of a malignant narcissist. He almost succeeded in completely ruining my life. I will be lucky to get away with my life as this time I am not returning.
I know someone like this. It's done so in a way that most people can't see what is happening. Until it's too late.
I wish I could just hug you ❤ so you could feel my appreciation for what you have done for me, Dr. Phil, because the words THANK YOU just don't seem enough.
UR COMMENT?!! THAT'S WEN U KNO U'V HAV OR HAD A NARCISSIST N UR LIFE!! I CALL THEM "DESTROYERS"!! CAUSE THAT'S WAT THEY R! DOESN'T MATTER IF THEIR MAN OR WOMEN!! 😢
I'm having to watch this in snippets, taking breaks, because it's so accurate for what I'm currently experiencing, and is triggering a lot of anxiety. What do you do to maintain desired family relationships when the narcissist is in so much control of them?! It's like walking on landmines and blowing up over and over and over again!
Same here 😞
I know the feeling... 😥
Don't bother.
There's no point in wasting your time with ignorance and enablers are the worst. All they're there to do is gather Intel on you so they can blow you up.
Leave the mine field and let them blow eachother up instead.
Leave and they'll turn on eachother guaranteed...
Same here as well. It's horrible.
Stay quiet and don't let them break you. You can refer to Dr. RAMANI'S videos as she has come up with strategies to deal with them and those strategies do work for me.
Dr Phil.. I can’t tell you how much you Dr C and Dr Ramani have helped me to understand what I’m living with.. My 87 year old MIL lives in the home with us and she is the most self centered Covert Narcissist with a splash of Malignant that my husband and I have ever seen.. Thank goodness my husband is 100% with me on how his mom is.. I’ve always been at her beckon call and I really have never minded.. Which include some pretty simple things that she was perfectly capable of doing but she loves people to do things for her.. She will even ask total strangers in a grocery store or anywhere to do something for her! This isn’t a recent thing she’s done but it’s just become very noticeable since living with her in the past few years.. The thing that finally made me say something to her was when she very casually said some absolutely horrible things about my mom who has been dead for 15 years now.. It caught me so off guard and literally broke my heart! I didn’t even know how to respond to her! All she would say is I needed to know! I told her I don’t believe her and I know my mom and she would never say the things you are accusing her of! That’s when the real nightmare began!
That’s when the smear campaign started about me and my character! She’s told friends and family that I called her a liar.. She’s told them I have a temper and that I’m violent.. Some family members namely her youngest son and his family choose to believe her (although I don’t really think they genuinely believe her)
Fortunately the friends she’s made these comments to are also our friends and they told us the things she was saying.. She said I almost pushed her down the stairs.. Absolutely Never Happened.. She said My husband kicked her out of our house! Absolutely Never Happened! All she’s done is pitted the brothers against each other and then cries because they don’t talk to each other now!
She has said so many horrible and hurtful things that I can’t even begin to describe it in the comments! This has been going on for close to 3 years now with only small lulls in the hurtful behavior..
She’s says hurtful comments.. I react.. And now I’m the bad person and she’s the victim.. This was the cycle until I started listening to videos like this that have made me realize that maybe I’m not the horrible person she’s made me out to be! Thank you Thank you Thank you!!
I’ve learned how to Grey Rock and I’ve learned to not take the bait anymore.. She tries hard to engage me but I just won’t.. I know she’s noticed and I think she’s a bit frustrated but it’s made living with her a lil more bearable..
I pray the Lord will continue to give you the strength to ignore and walk on when she does and says things to you. And may you be able to let her words roll off! And have the strength to not care if she is angry with you. It is not easy. I am sorry for anyone who has to be so close to these people. ☹️
I wouldn't have her in my home. I would send her to the nursing home. My malignant elderly father is the exact same way I'm done with helping him he has other people I want no part of it. I want no part of him.
Sounds like a Malignant Narc. It's pretty obvious. RUN.
I suppose your husband feels too guilty to send her to a nursing home? I would never put up with that, not after all I've been through and what I had to learn.
I so wish, I had this knowledge and information, 40 years ago 😕 I was never right, always to sensitive, on and on, I always tried to defend my sensitivity on the fact, I’m a girl 😊, a mother, a nurse. But, he always came back with, “ don’t wear your feelings on your sleeve “ 🤷♀️ In divorce court, I told the judge, “ the only thing, I have ever done, right, was stir the grape jelly with a fork, instead of a knife “ my ex, interrupted, and said, “ that’s right “ 🤷♀️
I remember asking a person one time; "can't you put yourself in their shoes?" And the immediate response was;"No, why would i want to do that?" and a look of utter confusion.
Yes, the same thing happened to me!! But this one got real angry, almost screamed: "No, I don't want to put myself in his shoes, why would I do that, he is disgusting, horrilbe, NOOO"
I love you Dr. Phil, you are spot on on all of it! It makes me feel better to listen to you talking and it makes it easier to get over the abuse
Manipulator , no….empty , liar , gaslighting & entitled . And like to destroy somebody’s life .
Wrong , You Never Get Over The Abuse . I've Been Waiting ( Trying ) To Get Over The Abuse For 8 Long Years
I could talk for hours on this subject, but I'll leave that up to Doc. Believe it or not. This is the 1st time I've ever listened to you in depth. Have heard others speak on the the subject. You all say the same things. What I want to know is. what do you when it's a family member. Who has literally torn, ( what used to be a close net group ) in half. Due to all the lying. Like the lady said. I didn't know these type people existed. And I keep wondering what's wrong with the world?😢
My brain is damaged, as is my 3 grown children. They are all on the spectrum, as is their dad. So communications happen on a very factual basis. My brain wasn’t allowing me to admit that I was married to a malignant narcissist. I also had no clue about the mental and emotional damage. Their dad bragged about cognitive dissonance. Combine that with gaslighting and it’s a miracle that they are functioning. They all are successful but socially they struggle, likely because they can’t express feelings. My suspicion is that what they learned from their dad is permanent and depressing.
No one is immune if you care and love others truthfully
Dr. Phil you’ve nailed it! I’ve been living with a Narcissist for over 17 years. I didn’t know such word as narcissist or gaslighting until my therapist described it to me. The same way you did! My mouth stayed open in surprise on how you are on point. Thank God for our Therapist and Dr. Phil!
"That never happened."
A classiic narc response
I love how this start right away without any bs intro
I sure wish that courts would crack down on these types of people. It seems like anything “domestic” gets handled like it’s not a problem for our society but just a behind closed doors problem. This is how we end up with people like Darrell Brooks running around on the streets after multiple terrible,violent “domestic violence” complaints and gets a slap on the hand until he runs his car through a parade.
I agree with you completely I just divorced a narcissist after 19yrs of he'll and not the lawyers or judges do not care about what happens when you have been with a narcissist courts don't care
Thanks for these great videos, Dr Phil. I have repeatedly heard every one of your gaslighting examples (7:55 - 8:40) from my narcissistic scapegoating family for all of my life. I am finally done with them.
" yeah..that's the whole point."
I love it!! Way to say it as it is Dr. Phil!!
Coverts are ravenous wolves in sheep's clothing!
Predators and Snakes.
Dr. Phil
Is it possible for a person to display covert narcissism for a time, and then to display malignant narcissism? I ask because my husband displayed many covert narcissism traits for appropriate 16 years. But I happen to catch him up in a really big lie. And I tried my best to get him to communicate with me. Then he’d explode into fits of rage! I’m just now learning about narcissism, but everything you’ve explained about covert and malignant describes him perfectly. I need help! Because our 18 year old daughter is with him right now. And I need to know how to keep her safe! I was blessed to get away from him but she wanted to spend some time with him. But I don’t want her to be harmed. Please help?!
This describes many of my family members, they seem to be so completely within themselves that they have no interest in anyone else except themselves. Gatherings with these people are agonizing, they only pay attention to the ones they admire who think just like them. They are very very cliquey! Anyone who is not like them is treated with contempt, they ignore them, mock them, and argue with them to the point of frustration. I stay away from family because of this problem, I have been the scapegoat all my life because I didn't do the things they do or dress the way they do. One of them once said; "so and so is classy", I asked what they meant by "classy" and their response was because of the way they dress. Nothing was mentioned about character. I have heard all these phrases numerous times. The narcissists feed off of one another in support so there is no one to visit with at the gatherings. It sort of feels like being back in high school. They like my husband so they pamper him and he does not see what they are doing or doesn't want to see it, so I am alone at the gatherings, I just don't go anymore because of it and he won't go without me so we are free from them. I learned a long time ago that these narcissists cannot be reasoned with on any level.
exactly the same with my family
I totally agree with you!
I am having been having difficulties since my mother passed on December 24, 2022.
I am on low income and do not qualify for expenses one bedroom apartments.
I applied for a place where I live in California but it takes one year to get into a place.
I wanted to move to Colorado because my siblings are all about money......
I have no control of the way Hud is, and the rules that they have!
But to them, it is all my fault!
Do not like going to my sister 's house because they do not include you in the conversation nor is their love genuine.
This is why I am leaving and get the hell away from them.
My sister has been conniving to me for years. She never wanted to achieve my dreams and have the job that I always wanted. She saw to that!
But for 40 years I stayed over night with her while her two husband's went out of town with their brothers to hunt or go fishing.
I stopped that because I am the one who had taken care of both of my parents until they passed away from 2013-2022.
My mother made a note stating that her jewelry was supposed to be divided between my sister and I. Not controlled by my older bother and his irragont wife.
But my sister did in fact go out to the house and grabbed what diamonds that she wanted. I wasn't there at the time. She knew my bother and hi wife would let her have what she wanted! And my brother just smiled and grind.
This is a narcissistic trait and his wife was encouraging my sister to take the 19 kart diamond 💎 .
She only gave me the post diamond earrings and a shoe that had a few diamonds 💎.
This is how she works! But karma comes out to bite back.
And your family will get theirs!😢
WOW!! SOUNDS LIKE ME. I PRAY FOR PEACE FOR YOU 💖
Describes my sis D on the dot.
Oh yahhh , all narc family
I'm very surprised Dr. Phil hasn't mentioned " the flying monkey's " . Thank you for your uploads 💛
Fleas
YESSSS
I was told the same thing about the malignant and extreme narcissists that I had dealt with....people said that the malignant narcissist was dangerous and crazy and I should walk away. I briefly considered "letting it go", but after watching those people continue to hurt and destroy other individuals, I decided to keep pursuing them, gathering evidence, and then expose them. It took a few years to get the job done, but they were exposed, they had legal scrutiny, and they went to ground and are keeping lower profiles. So unless they're still running cons in a somewhat quiet way, they will not be able to operate in certain sectors anymore.
God took my husband and partner of 20 years with carotid blowout in my arms after a bout of throat cancer. After his death I found out all kinds of lies and he left me with nothing but a mess and almost penniless all the while his family and friends canonize him. He was a professed Christian and had his masters in divinity. The trauma of this situation almost destroyed me. My God, family, pastors, therapist and those that know the truth are the only people I allow in my life and are able to give me space for the trauma I’ve been through. Tough, tough journey of healing and redemption. Thank you for shedding light on these evil sick people.
So glad you said this. I have watched somebody act like this and always present themselves as the savior, while they were the perpetrator.
One reason why we continue to forgive them is because they cry and beg. promise to do better. Truth is they only get worse......😢
NARCISSIST = DESTRUCTION
It would be fascinating to hear your opinions on how to navigate with family members (I.e children) who are still in the stage of being controlled by and making excuses for their narc parent.
I’d like to warn people staying in a marriage with a narc in order to shield/protect the children does NOT work. It only gives the narc more time to turn them against you & witness abuse against you, and watch you lose your self respect
My ex was the entire dark triad, and said these:,You’re crazy!, You’re sensitive!, You’re a narcissist! I cannot have that negativity in my life! I stopped having feelings! I talked to my buddy, a psychiatrist, he saw all the texts you sent me (during silent treatment), & thinks you have something wrong with you!
Thanks Dr. Phil for your professional insight on this subject! I would like to know more about it especially the work place people that have this problem that are in a leadership position! Thank you sir!
Yessss! Coworkers like this bring down moral. It’s hard to keep positive when they keep digging on your nerves. Lol trying to stay sane here trying to ignore one in particular at work. It does make me question altruism. Thanks Dr. Phil.
Brilliant podcast absolutely ingenious.
That's very interesting about the communal narcissist. Life is kind of like a Twilight Zone episode, with all these narcissist continually floating around. Scary.
😢😢🙌🙏🏽💯🙌🙏🏽💯
I’m definitely not new to this topic. I’ve unfortunately had to learn all about it from my ex husband. He was (in my opinion) a malignant narcissist. I have no idea when it happened because I would never go into any relationship knowingly with an abusive person. But little by little, control took over. He would allow me to do very little. The hardest thing was the fact that we lived near his family, so they were on his side. Near the end, he wouldn’t allow me to go to the doctor, but when the physical abuse started happening, I refused to make up excuses for him. I boldly told his friends and family what he did. I also began telling authorities. The very last day we were together it was as if I was watching a horror film. He had beat me so badly in front of two people and held a loaded gun to my head asking them what he should do with my body. I resigned to the fact that I was just going to die that day. But he didn’t pull the trigger. Instead dragged me upstairs and assaulted me before falling asleep with his gun next to the bed. I snuck out and texted my brother to call the police he is going to kill me. Then I quickly erased the text and went back to bed. He woke up and started to yell but I convinced him I just went to the bathroom and he went back to sleep. A few moments later the people downstairs came up and said the police were there. They came in and saw me bloodied and bruised and took me to the hospital and I pressed charges. First time. His first dv but he only got 3 months for it. Luckily I had recorded a great deal of his abuse over the last year so they actually listened to it in court. I was granted an immediate divorce and a protection order. I haven’t even spoken to him since. That was in 2017.
3 months,this is what’s wrong with the legal system. If you’d been a stranger that he did this to he’d probably have gotten 10-15 years.
Oh dear Lord I feel so sad this happened to you, it is so bruta and ugly. I do so hpe you can find peace, serenity and tranquility in your life now so you can really heal. I can empathise ith you in the vile situation you have been, and all the horrible torment and unimaginable physical and psychic pain youw ill no doubt have suffered. Let alone the humiliation, degradation and spite.
I am living with one, he is a malignant narc who swings from OCD-covert narc and back again. He is off on a cruise for two weeks leaving me as usual to do everything and ay for every single thing .....I wont be here when he igets back. I really do wish YOU well and hoe you can find your joy too,
So sorry about all that similar stuff has happen to me ea time he convinced me it was my fault for upsetting him he would sleep with gun under his pillow . When ever he rage id be quiet and when he fell asleep or took a shower i would sneak out and somehow he would convenience me to come back two weeks later . But finally i moved and its been almost a yr in feb 23
So many of you are expressing the behaviour of being attacked, then reacting, and then they become the victim for YOUR bad behaviour. Dr. Romani talks about this and the acronym is DARVO. Defend, Attack, Reverse Victim Offender. You can spot it every time and they are experts at it no matter how small or big the incident is. Even when I was terrified when he went through a red light (many times) and said how much it scared me….yea, you’re right, I was over reacting and now I get the silent treatment for the next 4 days, weeks, months. I promised myself a hundred I would not apologize anymore for HIS behaviour but always gave it because I couldn’t stand the silent treatment…longest I lasted was 4 weeks. I broke the silence and he said, “what are you talking about, that never happened!” ARRRRRRrrrr. You CANNOT win with these people. Thank goodness for Dr. Phil for shedding the light on all this and giving us some sense of sanity. Dr. Carter gives amazing coping skills too. Hang in there wounded warriors.
My sister was a narcissist. She passed away last year. The stuff i went thru with her could fill a book
Thank You For
Your Service 🌞
You’re absolutely right I’m a recovering domestic violence survivor & it took me many years to learn that it wasn’t 0:58 worth it & all I was doing was just wasting my time & my life I escaped after he nearly killed me again & I’m just grateful to be alive many people don’t survive domestic violence & I was almost one of them & even though I’m safe now I still don’t feel safe & I still have nightmares each night because I have P.T.S.D
Once again Dr. Phil you have idea what I have been through so thank you for helping me to be able to walk away and know I deserve to be happy
More Videos on how children that are raised by a narcissist parent can deal with them.
Some of us grew up & didn’t realize what the problem was until well into adulthood & we had our own families & now we are trying to learn how to deal with our families now that we know.
I chose to move 4,000 miles away from mine and that was one of the best decisions I have ever made.
Everyone in my family sticks with the narcissist leader in my family and gang up on me so it’s challenging to deal with any of them not just the one that is the narcissist so videos on that would be very helpful & much appreciated!
WOW FROM START TO FINISH!!!!!!! IF YOU COULD OF ONLY SEEN HOW MANY TIMES I SMILED AS YOU SPOKE. THEY'RE EXHAUSTING & THIS IS A FAMILIAR STORY.
Very well explained. Thank you sir. 🙏
Thank you ... Dr Phil this series with Narcissistic Personalities has been helpful. My sister has been this way and llofe has been awful. Keeping this a simple THANK YOU but rhis comes from a DEEP HEARTFILLED PLACE WITHIN. THANK YOU !!❤
Good advice Dr. Phil. So helpful. Your style sticks with me. 🤓
So true I have gone through this for years with my sister and its been he'll my whole life and she has always manipulated our mother to believing her all these years and it literally tore me apart . I always felt not loved . I was a punching bag and literally thats what I was she violently has smacked me thrown things at me for literally just not agreeing with her .Now as I grew older and have found your website I thank you. And just as we speak I just saw her and again I was attacked ( smacked across my face) for feeling her to stop treating me wrongly. I finally have made my decision to stop all contact with her . She has cancer today and she still tried to blame it on our family and hear I still tried to have compassion for her .NO MORE...... Thank you Dr. Phil so much for all your help ❤
Really excellent content, thank you.
Human Resource departments are sorely lacking in the skills for handling these evil individuals.
Very helpful. Thank you ❤! Grateful
Very demonic and destroying your life , thanks God the Lord spear me for a further destruction . The devil will not , win because I have God who love me . God bless everyone ❤️
FINALLY got back to my sences. Thanks
Narcissistic personality disorder is running rampant these days!
💯 this resonates big time. My brothers did this constantly all my life.
Broke my heart to see this and pray 🙏🏽 😢
Great point!!!!! About pictures!
THANK YOU DR. PHIL! I AM CONFERTED.
Eye opener for sure 🤨🧐👍🏽 Thank You 🙏🏼
For sure gaslight and creating more trouble to your life , but the demonic agenda will not gonna win , for sure as long your life belongs to Christ !!!
thank you. i have primary psychopathy. I appreciate the work that you put out there.
Dr Phil everyone should know about narcissistic people especially coverts- the undercover sweet types!
Thanks so much ~ 🌟
Thank you
Thank you Dr. Phil as well! I don't like reliving what I'm going through now, but as you know there's breaks in the intense life I'm living where I can catch my breath then back at the wtf is wrong with him daily hell.
More updates if you have would be great! ✌️♥️💔👏👍
My kids principal & a close friend helped hide me & leave my ex. He threatened all of them! & Told me I was sneaky for the way I left. No I left the way I knew I'd be safe.
Thank you for reminding Me to stop defending myself Dr.Phil.
TOTAL AND COMPLETE TRUTH.
❤❤❤ Soo Thankful for You & your protective hand guiding us! ✋🏈❤️ Go Team!! 💞💞💞
I believe the narcissist behavior is a big cover up for a secret soft vulnerable little girl inside. I have seen her barrier slip before I know it wasn't an act. We were kind of friends before she became defensive and unsure and blocked me out most of the time. She tried to manipulate me but I really enjoyed knocking her wall down and seeing the real her for a couple minutes 🙂
We do appreciate these videos. I too want to help people.
Thanks Dr Phil for these episodes. I was with a malignant narcissist for 14 years. From the beginning it seemed like he went from just a classic npd to a covert. But the last three years he was definitely a malignant narcissist and psycoparh. I have listened to many different videos . Yours gave a more accurate description and I honestly believe that they can progress from one state to the next. But yes the malignant is the most dangerous. He became as Satan himself is all that I can describe. Sometimes I felt as though he were using something he had seen on TV to do to me. Locking me for 3 days with no food or water four bathroom. Taking my phone stealing my car. Raping me. Finally I was able to get strong enough and brave enough to literally run from my life. In fact I used his own behavior and turned it around on him in order to escape. We were both living in Mexico and he has been deported from the US and I have since been able to return to live safely in the US far away from him and his abuse. . But I can attest do the different stages of narcissism.
7:55-9:07 this was my x that i was with between 2008-2012, it took me 7 years too realized how much damage she had done too me mentally and emotionally.
I am an LPC and have been in relationships with covert and malignant narcissists. I have even specialized in personality disorders. It is extremely complicated!
FACTS!!!
It's wild isn't it?... when you finally come to yourself and realize you're in the middle of clinical (____)..
So accurate. My narc told me it was common sense to read his mind
I never pretended that I tripped or hit my head on a cupboard.. I always said "Yeah, Keith did it" He used to get mad at me for putting it "out there" but I wanted people to know how he was and truthfully how I accepted it for only 2 years.. This was many,many years ago.I am kind of sad that he is dead now but I knew he would be at a young age 48 It saddens me to know that he had so much potential. If we could have been on your show years ago, things could have been different
So many truths here Dr Phil
Could you make a video on religious/pastoral narcissism?
Thanks
In regards to communal narcissists, the worst part is that they try to portray the perfect picture when people are paying attention, but behind closed doors, the mask slips off, and the monster shows its true face. Wives, husbands, especially children all pay the price of their true narcissist selves.
First time here dr Phil, great chat!
Wow!!! Thanks for such an ecxellent information. I am sorry i am a bit late.
Mine was more subtle, but he would say, "You knew I was an entrepreneur when you married me." This was his response to never coming home until late, never eating dinner with me and many other issues. Had I known what I know now.....
Don't we all feel that way? I consider it a blessing that there is all this info on internet about narcissism now. Thank God I don't have to go to my grave still questioning if it was all my fault.
I’ve been physically compromised by 3rd parties in public. I was in a car park shopping centre and a vehicle drove directly towards me and brushed me with their car door. It’s not the first time I’ve been targeted by 3rd parties. I have felt unsafe at times because I’ve been monitored and followed and computer hacked and emails stolen. It takes all your freedoms away.
*DR. PHIL TEACHING ABOUT THE NARCISSISTS IS AWESOME! I GOT MY BIG O HAMMER!🔨 you better put a period at the end SMASH!🔨*
Thank you Dr Phil for all your work. This is highly appreciated. Could you please speak about how to recognise a covert narcissist before it's too late? Because my narcissist hide it for years before anything happened, any signs. And so did a colleague she was friends with her x for 15 years, but when she moved in, bam! How is this possible, and how do you discover these?
And what can a person who have grown up with a Narcissist family do to avoid bumping into narcissist after narcissist? What signs should they watch out for? What do the narcissistic look for in those people, and how do they detect them?
I gave up dating because i was too scared to date another malignant. A childhood friend and covert narcissist has destroyed me for the last 4 years. Way more than 10% of the population. I didnt know my "best friend " was malignant and her family couldn't warn me when she ran off with all of our moneys this tax yr.
Narcissist conveniently erases all the bad he did, blaming others for the break up. Not remembering the reason you escaped him. He being also possessed with demons, seeing some strange things happening.
Thank you so much for these videos!! It is empowering me so much to deal with my husband-narcissist and I have 4 kids with him which makes it hard for me to leave him till kids are grown up. Could you please make a video with a case like mine with a husband-narcissist and kids that he has with his wife whom he emotionally and verbally abuses before the kids?
My ex-husband had the dark triad. 18 years of pure hell, I’m amazed we didn’t both end in prison due to all the cons and schemes he involved me in.
I was always shy in group settings, school church, etc, don't like organizations! I was always a class clown, love making ppl laugh...especially the girls... loved the girls! My problem I served them so much I idolized them...
First of all - Long Life Dr Phil! May God keep you here forever as we need more people like you. Yuo help me a lot to understand what is not wrong with me and why I do attract the same kind of people again and again. Many times I was feeling like a beacon for mosquitos - flashing in the dark so they come to bite me. About the body temperature - this is fascinating. I have kind of "condition" since childhood - I feel no fear of any kind... and I am always cold. I used to hit against some sharp corners as a toddler and it didn't teach me any lesson. I feel pain but it is not stopping me to do it again. My mother was worried a bit about it when I was a child but now I am kind of well. Still no fear so I do sometimes stupid things just to have a taste of it - and I have no fear of being burn - if you get my point. My body temp is always 0.5 - 1.0C lower the average and actaully I have a problem to heat up myself. Even very spicy food is doing the job only for a short period of time. I do have some "hot flushes" but very, very rarely and it has to be something really strong(emotionally). People use to complain that sometime I suddenly blow out - out of proportions. The reality is: if I am getting bullied - I don't even blink and for long time I am really "cool" but when it is way too much - then suddenly I get hot inside and then there is no chance to stop me, kind of like nuclear reactor :) Then after I cool down very quickly, rather in seconds then even minutes and someone can bully me again :)
Thank you lord for working w men 🙏🏽🙌💯🙏🏽🙌🙌
Just discovered your channel and subscribed. As a child of a narcissist father and a narcissist brother, if you haven't already, i would love to hear you speak to the effects of a nacissist parent on the child/children.
💯 Its Creepy AF!!
You’re a quick study. It’s very hard to “get” these demented humans unless you’ve been
Personally effected.
I'm glad you're finally addressing this, but let's talk about when they have broken you down enough that they start beating you physically, and you're so messed with in the head you feel lime it's your fault.
I’ve heard the “what’s wrong with you?!” quite often.
This is my father's 💯 and I am his target . Dr Phil is right you just need to walk the other way . I have set up boundaries .
Dr Phil so interesting. I got it right! Full on covert narcissist.