@@Battlefox64_RL every comedian has different personality, if you dont like it then dont watch it, its simple. I doubt alot of people feel the same way as you
@@Battlefox64_RL That's a hot take, most of Burts appeal is the chaos that occasionally aligns in brilliantly funny moments. Both intentional and unintentional
@@ryleyreid3662 I honestly feel bad for saying it and hope he doesn't ever see my original comment.. I love burt I just don't want him hurting himself with the non stop party.
That Ariel Elias clip is absolutely wild, and she was so clean with it, the composure from her was unreal, thanks for showing the clip on here or else I might not have seen it
“Which is the diabetes that you get?” “…that you get? What do you mean?” “That you can catch from living life?” My God Bert, I’m so concerned about your well-being. 😂
I don’t like listening to him when he does it… but I have a feeling Leeann talks a lot of shit and tells him when he’s been drunk and fat a lot and he doesn’t like her being honest with him
@@BPH55 She's got a great gig honestly. Gets to live in a mansion, drive nice cars, not have to work, do whatever she wants all day every day. She's living the dream. And Bert is constantly working or out getting drunk, so she doesn't have to deal with him that often. Bert even said that during the pandemic lockdown that his family was incredibly annoyed by his mere presence.
Yeah he quit drinking and replaced it with more binge eating. Barf is the spitting image of "you can't out run a bad die". Weight loss is primarily based on diet, you can workout everyday but if you order 5 entrees every night when you eat out it doesn't matter lmao.
I always get that feeling I'm at a party stuck in the kitchen with the drunk talker. And then Tom is the white knight who steps in for another beer and then proceeds to run interference for everybody by actually engaging him in the "conversation".
a balm for the sting of being talentless - "it's all luck". there are some realms where luck plays a role but stand up is not one of them. stand-up is the hardest performance art that exists and it ain't even close. other than the machine story, I haven't heard Bert's stand-up but if he's filling theaters then he is making people laugh - Barton is quite talented.
@@rockstrong4342 it’s his personality. He’s a good time. He brings out that part of you you wish would just let loose. I was joking with my comment. Now that I look back a little snide, but I also do think (and I’m quite familiar with his start). He lands on his feet pretty good, and real tragedy has eluded him, obviously a good thing. Just saying I understand how luck works.
Tom and Bert talking about how’s there’s nothing better then a father son relationship.. while I’m here not relating at all cuz my dad gave my sisters all the attention while I had to be a “man” and “suck it up” since I got out the womb 😂😂😭😭💀💀 still love my dad though lmaooo
Best buds have the best conversations, makes me really miss my best friend. Apparently other people dont know what that's like and have lectures where one person can talk and the other has to remain quiet the entire time
@@Lost_n_Found_1 comment section always being dicks. Not fans just assholes. Tom and Bert dont get twisted about who talks when. They just have fun talking like friends do.
@@-jq8gt idk what that has to do with it. I'm saying people here complain about how they talk to each other and just let them have a conversation like they normally do.
Every few months when I start feeling down I like listening to Bert and realize how shallow his life is and that in itself makes me feel some better about my struggles in life.
He’s happy, makes a great living, and gets to be his authentic self. I get the Bert bashing, but I think there’s more to be envious of than to genuinely dislike about him
Matt Farah actually used to have a killer watch podcast. Their breakdowns of the full history of brands really drew me into the world. Watch and Listen podcast I believe was the name
Holy crap my mom did that mask and chainsaw thing when I was a kid! We're all watching a scary movie, and she busts in with a chainsaw and a mask on, we scatter like roaches, and my older sister knocked herself out running into the sliding glass door 😂
When I was a kid my neighbor got scared by his Dad on Halloween and the kid tried to kill his Dad in his sleep. He's a genuine fucked up person I think he will be a serial killer. Don't think he'll ever have a girl or friends. I ran into him when I was a student teacher in college like a decade later and he didn't remember me. The entire semester he was quoting SpongeBob SquarePants and that's all he talked about all the time. He has really ragity hair and a long fucked up beard. His name is Zach Bryant.
Well, technically, you have to be sober for a very long time for alcohol to completely leave your blood stream. I drank hard for years, not liquor just beer and it took 18 months to fully leave my body. It's also extremely dangerous to cold turkey so I don't think any of his doctors would've suggested sobriety immediately. I had to take Xanax for months to makesure I didn't die lol. No way he isn't completely sober. He does have the finances to go completely sober like with an at home nurse, but idk. He doesn't seem like he wants sobriety. It would change his entire personality and Bruce seems to be okay with bruce.
@@anthonyzullo I’m glad you got sober. And I agree it seems like he doesn’t want sobriety as much as his friends want it for him. We can see when he is drinking heavily that he tends to downplay it or sometimes lie about it’s seriousness. Bert is a very entertaining person and it would suck to lose him to this.
@@broman21 I'm not sober, I was chemically addicted meaning my body would break down without it. I love beer, not having a beer with my son or glass of wine with Mt daughter at their wedding just isn't gonna fly. But with Bert, idk, he is genetically a freak so maybe he can do it. I feel like he will hate himself. Then again, these are parasocial things, we really don't know his true feelings. If we did lose him to alcoholism I do feel we would all feel partial blame. But, he has rhe best support group of buddies and fans around the globe that'll root for him for anything. I think he will get sober when the girls are fully gone. I wish em the best no matter what. It is extremely dangerous to get sober after a lifetime of alcohol. I went 16 years of daily drinks that when I got sober I was just not myself but then again I had never been sober as an adult at all, just didn't know who I was. I'll say this, after discovering myself I started my own company and now do great things for others. Idk who Bruce will be if he's sober but I'm sure he will love that guy anyway
Bert's selective listening is really on point today
Off the first clip 😂
@@dylanphipps8383 it sustains throughout 🤣 gotta love the guy
😂
Yeah until 25 min in 😂🤣😂🤣😂
Bert? We talkin bout Brant Kammerdiener?
Nothing says “I’m waiting for my turn to talk” like Bert saying literally exactly what Tom just said without skipping a beat. 🤣
@@Battlefox64_RL every comedian has different personality, if you dont like it then dont watch it, its simple. I doubt alot of people feel the same way as you
@@Battlefox64_RL That's a hot take, most of Burts appeal is the chaos that occasionally aligns in brilliantly funny moments. Both intentional and unintentional
@@ryleyreid3662 I honestly feel bad for saying it and hope he doesn't ever see my original comment..
I love burt I just don't want him hurting himself with the non stop party.
@@ALLTimeGamerTroll Youhave GOT to be KIDDING.
Annoying as hell
Burt stealing toms baseball line about himself is PEAK Bart
He’s definitely using that one with another group of people like he came up with it. Lol.
Loved hearing Tom trash bert during his set this past weekend in Vegas.
Classic Burnt being Birt
Barfy boy
That's exactly what I just said about me!
Proud of Bert, hearing a lot more "I won't say their name" instead of just telling everyone's secrets. This is progress.
October is officially over. Get ready for some secrets 🥴
You should watch the newest one he was saying all the names haha
Tom: I understand how you could murder your newborn.
Bert: I’m scared of the dark!
P
Does anyone one else think that Bert could call seagulls down when he really gets to laughing? 🤣
Damn, Tom is looking thin. Bert is looking Bert.
Quit gaslighting bert
@@renabshire4704 he is describing Bert, not gaslighting him you tik tok
His left arm in particular has some sick cuts
Bert is insufferable
@@blunttrauma5300 are we using tik tok as an insult now? This is good, very good.
im so glad i watched this AFTER the birthday episode because its magical.
" i love history ", " time to take my power back" its just amazing
Bert telling people Tom wears lifts is easily the funniest thing he’s ever said
Sad but true
Definitely funniest thing he’s ever done. Made me giggle so hard. So unexpected 😂
The funniest part as a listener of their stuff is like "oh thats not true?!" 😂😂😂
I mean it's not hard to do. He never says anything funny
It’s funnier when you consider Tom just got done talking about how often people say he looks taller than they expected
Sidebar sidebar 🤣🤣 we need to salute Tom because having a conversation with bert is the hardest thing to do 😆😆😆
Bart “I like a good quality track suit” also Brice “I got some off Amazon for like 9 bucks”
God his logic is gold
Bert
How did you get his name wrong both times 🤣
@@riskylifie smh. you must be new here.
@@riskylifie welcome to the club. newbie
These are the best Episodes. Just the two of them. They kill and feed off of each-others energy like crazy. So fun to watch.
That Ariel Elias clip is absolutely wild, and she was so clean with it, the composure from her was unreal, thanks for showing the clip on here or else I might not have seen it
Was that the kid who washed up in Miami from Cuba?
I was estatic to see that clip here. She was the ultimate badass. I bet she was shaking and still managed to play that off.
25:10 - close your eyes and picture Tom standing on a seagull's neck. That's Bert's laugh.
Dude Louis C.K. pulling out a magic book on stage might be the funniest story ive heard bert tell in a while
Man that Bert jumping on Tommy's baseball story like that makes me think Tommy was the one that spent time with the Russian Mafia.
“Which is the diabetes that you get?”
“…that you get? What do you mean?”
“That you can catch from living life?”
My God Bert, I’m so concerned about your well-being. 😂
As if it just comes at random 😂
64 ounces of daily kool aid
@@father3dollarbill i got it from 4 liters of soda a day
Like his doctors haven’t been warning him for years or anything 🤣
Bert’s laugh progresses from man to some type of bird after a while 💀😂
It's a seagull being choked to death.
Whenever Bert claims that its just how he and his wife love each other, I always wonder if she knows that LOL
😂
I don’t like listening to him when he does it… but I have a feeling Leeann talks a lot of shit and tells him when he’s been drunk and fat a lot and he doesn’t like her being honest with him
She knows that he makes money so she doesn’t have to work. And he leaves the house a lot so she can have a break from him regularly.
@@BPH55 She's got a great gig honestly. Gets to live in a mansion, drive nice cars, not have to work, do whatever she wants all day every day. She's living the dream. And Bert is constantly working or out getting drunk, so she doesn't have to deal with him that often. Bert even said that during the pandemic lockdown that his family was incredibly annoyed by his mere presence.
She’s a caretaker for a wealthy mentally handicapped man child 😅
I bumped into Bert on the streets of Indy this weekend. One of the best moments I have ever experienced.
Bert gagging at the thought of girls in sneakers and bathing suit is insane.
I love scantily clad women in sneakers and hiking boots, lol.
@@Lost_n_Found_1 ....Washing cars in bikinis .
Same dude that wears a thong swimming lol
Bret insane? Are you sure? That doesn't sound the krasinski I know
I thought Betty bert was supposed to lose weight this month
Me listening to Tim tell Bart the theater story for the 10th time. And Bart hearing it for the first.
Who’s Tim & Bart?
@@savannahrenae9419 Also known as Burnt Crystal's and Tommy Buns
54:15 I’m pretty sure Bert just let a fart loose ☠️😂
Definitely did 😂😂😂😂
Holy shit good pickup 😂
Good catch lmao
LMFAO they both slightly acknowledged it too 🤣🤣🤣
You can see the end of his leaning for it too😆🤣
We need another guest appearance with Bobby. Miss seeing Tom’s thrill of Bobby’s chaos
Watching the rage build in Tom when he’s wrong is GOLD
You mean when he knows he’s right and a retard is telling him he’s wrong
he was correct though
True. But he was actually right 😂
He wasn't wrong though
Bert still having the security tag on a hydroflask is such a "Bert" move
The fact that Bert thinks he lost 20+ pounds this month is the best part.
I don't understand how he thinks he's "healthy"
You mean evry month since 2021, dude should b -600 lbs at this stage🤣🤣
Super easy, he works out and loses it but gains it back just as fast keeping him in this 20lb rebound area.
@@jacobiwilson3887 His brain doesn't function properly.
Yeah he quit drinking and replaced it with more binge eating. Barf is the spitting image of "you can't out run a bad die". Weight loss is primarily based on diet, you can workout everyday but if you order 5 entrees every night when you eat out it doesn't matter lmao.
I love how on JRE, joe kept shutting Bart up. It was funny watching Tom laugh when Joe would knock burnt down a peg. 😂
Bert calling himself out for the stretchy shirt was gold
he needs a TC Tugger shirt
@@rbuccino33 Me me I'm a TC Tugger man
@@rbuccino33 he needs liposuction
That TC Tugger skit made me start therapy it was so close to home.
Tom's "dad talk" moment of the episode...
"Wait, say your sentence again". 😆
Tom: And then she drank the beer.
Bert: I like her. I’m gonna follow her.
Who ever is dying from laughter in the background every couple of minutes has me laughing every time
Ariel picking up that beer and chugging it is a complete bamf move!
At 56:01, Bert says "jizzled" jaw instead of chiseled LOL
Its funny how Bert repeatedly says he thinks Louie *didn't* like him in past tense.
Louie didn't like Bart back in the day. He still doesn't, but also back then.
The present will also be in the past tomorrow
I laughed so fucking hard when Tom told Bert, "well you're wrong A LOT"
Bert had us all with him wanting to hear Tim tell us what happened at the wild show, then we never get there 😂
That bugged this shit out of me
24:27 the most Bert moment of all time lol he really does love him some him
Just waiting for his turn to talk 😂😂😂 no real listening required
Bert literally stresses me out but I still listen to every pod
I always get that feeling I'm at a party stuck in the kitchen with the drunk talker. And then Tom is the white knight who steps in for another beer and then proceeds to run interference for everybody by actually engaging him in the "conversation".
Lmao same. I love them both, but for fuck sake, let Tom finish a story/talk
@@-jq8gt that was a very apt analogy
Bert has come a long way, starting his day off with a bone broth instead of a 64 Oz Kool-Aid
He's been in baseball as long as I've been in comedy 😭😭
Is it just me but Brent dose not look like he's been sober for a month he needs to start drinking again 😂
Bert’s having a few drinks by midnight guaranteed..
You know they filmed all the sober October episodes a month ago... I think it's actually Sober September so he's been on a binge for a month now 😃👍
Let's be real. Bert already has a dozen shots pre-poured and lined up for midnight.
Listening to this podcast to hear Tom talk is like moving to the desert for regular rainfall.
I keep coming back to this podcast not only because it's hilarious but just the genuine friendship is so apparent
47:06 This is the look of Tom imagining his future in hell, Chief Torturer of Hecklers
When they were talking about their heights, I googled "Tom Segura height" and got the suggestion "Bruce Kreischer height" 🤣
The off camera laugh is almost funnier than the jokes half the time.
Cant believe I got a ticket to see Tom. Omg. Howdy from Belfast.
@@bettercallseoul1504 do you own a hammer?
“He was the right amount of black but too big” was great
Burnts brain is like having a bunch of open tabs and never deleting them, and never returning to the previous pages.
“ that’s what I just said about me“ new top 5 bears moment
I can’t wait for another episode of the Bert show
Last week(?) felt like a breakthrough for Bartrum. He was talking about firehosing and being introspective. Whelp, that was fun while it lasted.
The Waynes bros is hands down of the best talented families!!
Bart is really adamant he knows Brad Pitt’s kids. 😂
Tom's never yelled like that at nadav without also joking he must've wanted to strangle burnt.
Is no one going to mention the stole water bottle Bert has 😂😂 at least cut the security tag off 😆
So Bert switched from drinking Kool-aid to iced coffee and bone broth? Lmao.
Wonder if he drinks a gallon of bone broth a day lol
Birthday gifts should definitely turn into experiences, and Tom should get Bert a high end tailored suit to begin with 🙏🏼🤣
Tom: "Then she drank the beer"
Bert: "I like her!"
Who would have thought! 🙈
25:09 Bert sounds like a bird mating call lol. I laughed so fucking hard at that. 😂
Every time I want to get upset at where I am at life no matter how hard I try. I listen to Bart and realize it’s allllll luck.
a balm for the sting of being talentless - "it's all luck".
there are some realms where luck plays a role but stand up is not one of them. stand-up is the hardest performance art that exists and it ain't even close. other than the machine story, I haven't heard Bert's stand-up but if he's filling theaters then he is making people laugh - Barton is quite talented.
@@rockstrong4342 it’s his personality. He’s a good time. He brings out that part of you you wish would just let loose. I was joking with my comment. Now that I look back a little snide, but I also do think (and I’m quite familiar with his start). He lands on his feet pretty good, and real tragedy has eluded him, obviously a good thing. Just saying I understand how luck works.
@@zozoartstudio4727 I was kinda being shitty but I see so many people talking bad about Bert and the "all luck" thing just hit me wrong.
I love when Berndt's laughter goes from cackle squeak to aggressive seagull. Beautiful stuff.
I legit thought Bert had a kidney transplant and was wondering why he hadn't addressed it 🤣🤣 fantastic
The Edmund Hillary/Tenzing Norgay reference was 👌😂
Nice to hear Bert AGAIN today.
Bert went full Stewie Griffon on that intro laugh
Tom & Bert wanting an expensive watch podcast is the singularity
Even the thought of middle aged white guys having a podcast about expensive watches and shoes makes me want to quit the internet permanently.
We saw Tom in Vegas this weekend. HILARIOUS. Bert the Mechanic!!
Last day of Sober October! It shows, you two look amazing, keeping them high and tight!
Type 2 Diabetes, the silent Killer!
Only one of them does…
This was filmed weeks ago.
Eating too many Enchiladitos may result in serious medical problems...
@@niteshade8546 nope, they mention the date at the end. Next time try touching my camera through the fence you f…….
@@niteshade8546 they started the episode with happy Halloween
I love that 2 Bears comes out early. Now I can watch this until Bad Friends is uploaded at noon!
Bert: "that never happens at my shows" me: *passed out at Bert's show in Dayton while on LSD*
Lol Brutt saying "welcome to America, Ketchup" @22:23
1:12:45 Tom just letting it all out - priceless
the way Bert says "what are we doing here" with so much introspection at the prospect of not going all out is hilarious 1:23:50
I still feel pride observing that Baltimore Oriole's cap behind Bert. ChaOs cOming!
Oriole's fans can check out Locked on Orioles on TH-cam to hear about their prospective off-season decisions for the 2023 season. ChaOs cOming
Burt seagull laughing kills me everytime
I swear I heard Bart talking about buying nice tracksuits over a year ago
I love Burts laugh lol you need to make a shirt where his face is balloon and the tip is being pinched while releasing the air 😆
happy halloween tim, bart and the booth boys!
@@bettercallseoul1504 bot or moron
I don’t know who is laughing 😂 in the background but I love it
Honestly if you’re truly in love with someone you can both make fun of each other and just laugh and enjoy each other…
Not blatantly disrespect
Yeah maybe not to the level that Bert does though haha.
Tom and Bert talking about how’s there’s nothing better then a father son relationship.. while I’m here not relating at all cuz my dad gave my sisters all the attention while I had to be a “man” and “suck it up” since I got out the womb 😂😂😭😭💀💀 still love my dad though lmaooo
Sometimes I feel like I remember more about Tom than Bart does hahaha
We all do lol
George, Jeb, Neil, Tom and Burt Bush 😂😂😂
Best buds have the best conversations, makes me really miss my best friend. Apparently other people dont know what that's like and have lectures where one person can talk and the other has to remain quiet the entire time
Who are we referring to, pray tell?
Do you make thousands of dollars just for having your best conversations though?
@@Lost_n_Found_1 comment section always being dicks. Not fans just assholes. Tom and Bert dont get twisted about who talks when. They just have fun talking like friends do.
@@-jq8gt idk what that has to do with it. I'm saying people here complain about how they talk to each other and just let them have a conversation like they normally do.
It's amazing how Todd looks great and Brett still looks preggers
I love when Tom's gets angry at Nadav 🤣🤣
It's very disappointing Nadav breathes still
Every few months when I start feeling down I like listening to Bert and realize how shallow his life is and that in itself makes me feel some better about my struggles in life.
He’s happy, makes a great living, and gets to be his authentic self. I get the Bert bashing, but I think there’s more to be envious of than to genuinely dislike about him
Tom "well you are wrong about alot of things" .. saving that one up for a while haha
Matt Farah actually used to have a killer watch podcast. Their breakdowns of the full history of brands really drew me into the world. Watch and Listen podcast I believe was the name
Yep, HODINKEE also has a podcast, there is also the gray nato podcast and a couple others
Not even 3 minutes into the Sober October recap on JRE and Bert was already asking for another drink 😂
Happy Halloween Bears!! 🎃🐻🐻👻
Tom sincerely agreeing saying there should be a watch podcast 😆 😂
“I think I’d love my dad more if he had a Jizzled jaw too”. 56:02
-Bret Krispy
"That's exactly what I just said about me!!" 😂
It would be such a bert thing to say "No I haven't cheated, I just put the tip in"
dude tom yelling at nadav LMAO CAN YOU FUCKIN SEARCH HAD ME ROLLING
Holy crap my mom did that mask and chainsaw thing when I was a kid! We're all watching a scary movie, and she busts in with a chainsaw and a mask on, we scatter like roaches, and my older sister knocked herself out running into the sliding glass door 😂
When I was a kid my neighbor got scared by his Dad on Halloween and the kid tried to kill his Dad in his sleep. He's a genuine fucked up person I think he will be a serial killer. Don't think he'll ever have a girl or friends. I ran into him when I was a student teacher in college like a decade later and he didn't remember me. The entire semester he was quoting SpongeBob SquarePants and that's all he talked about all the time. He has really ragity hair and a long fucked up beard. His name is Zach Bryant.
So cool that they shouted out that comic, love that
The fact bert hasn't been drinking for a month and STILL constantly has a red face is alarming
I think he may be lying about staying sober because his face wasn't even this red last monday
Well, technically, you have to be sober for a very long time for alcohol to completely leave your blood stream. I drank hard for years, not liquor just beer and it took 18 months to fully leave my body. It's also extremely dangerous to cold turkey so I don't think any of his doctors would've suggested sobriety immediately. I had to take Xanax for months to makesure I didn't die lol. No way he isn't completely sober. He does have the finances to go completely sober like with an at home nurse, but idk. He doesn't seem like he wants sobriety. It would change his entire personality and Bruce seems to be okay with bruce.
@@anthonyzullo I’m glad you got sober. And I agree it seems like he doesn’t want sobriety as much as his friends want it for him. We can see when he is drinking heavily that he tends to downplay it or sometimes lie about it’s seriousness. Bert is a very entertaining person and it would suck to lose him to this.
@@broman21 I'm not sober, I was chemically addicted meaning my body would break down without it. I love beer, not having a beer with my son or glass of wine with Mt daughter at their wedding just isn't gonna fly. But with Bert, idk, he is genetically a freak so maybe he can do it. I feel like he will hate himself. Then again, these are parasocial things, we really don't know his true feelings. If we did lose him to alcoholism I do feel we would all feel partial blame. But, he has rhe best support group of buddies and fans around the globe that'll root for him for anything. I think he will get sober when the girls are fully gone. I wish em the best no matter what. It is extremely dangerous to get sober after a lifetime of alcohol. I went 16 years of daily drinks that when I got sober I was just not myself but then again I had never been sober as an adult at all, just didn't know who I was. I'll say this, after discovering myself I started my own company and now do great things for others. Idk who Bruce will be if he's sober but I'm sure he will love that guy anyway