Why Don't Worry Darling Doesn't Work ...
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 31 ต.ค. 2022
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Despite behind-the-scenes drama, Olivia Wilde's 2022 "thriller" is uninteresting because it has nothing to say. Especially in comparison with its spiritual ancestor, The Stepford Wives.
Audio / Credits Editing: joey
Voice Acting: @Lola Sebastian
Music: Epidemic Sound
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Keywords: Don’t Worry Darling, Olivia Wilde, Florence Pugh, Harry Styles, feminism, second-wave feminism, The Stepford Wives, Glenn Close, Fatal Attraction - บันเทิง
“The mastermind behind the patriarchal horror town was actually a woman” as a twist has the same energy to me as “the homophobic jock is secretly gay”. There is something there that can be used to examine how some people within marginalized groups work to uphold systems that oppress them, in the hopes that it will keep them safe/secure. But the idea is usually used as a simple knee-jerk twist that shifts the blame for oppressive systems onto those they oppress.
Or it turns suspicion back on those who are full of hate. Why do they care? What does it have to do with them?
Who else could believe that being gay is a choice, other than someone who has to actively choose to continue to act heterosexual?
I am forever haunted by how when she was questioned why brainchip the women and not the men, she answered “they would be next”. Like her whole plan was for an automaton world where no one had free will and were this idealized 50s people. Talk about the plot being a white woman’s fantasy huh.
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@@Mecharnie_Dobbs you’re assuming that homophobes are being truthful in their reasoning instead of just scrambling for excuses
I actually kind of like the way their hairstyles are from a ton of different eras. It shows that this town isn't really the 50's - just an ignorant nostalgic recreation of a romanticized version of what they think the 50's was.
Idk, I feel like that one creative decision has more to say than most of the creative decisions in this movie.
I thought the same thing! that's actually what made me realize way before the twist that the whole thing was a simulation or cult à la The Village. That and the fact that these folks from the literal 50s were so ok with mixed race couples
looooove this analysis
Like how Jack is british in this ameircan town, even though not even the real jack is he just liked the idea of being british
@@brittaistheworst7523 They do that all the time in movies anymore (the mixed couples). Pst, Hollywood, ignoring racism does not make it go away.
@@targaghjj That really isn't the point. There's no reason not to include people of all races in media. Can you give reasoning as to why the cast should have been all white? They still make plenty of movies about racism and its effects too. Tf? It's like you are only capable of complaining about problems that aren't real.
"my wife works to much. I will make this robot that cleans and takes care of the children." "so it helps her out, right?" "so it helps her out, right??"
Right. To help her out not to take her place 😂
We never truly knew what type of job he did but form the looks of his workstation, he seemed like a software engineer or developer. He couldnhave definietely built something to make their lives easier. Nah, he'll just torture his non-loser wife.
I always wonder about the idea that taking care of children is a simple task suitable for people without brains, or in this case robots.
(Or that cleaning and cooking is completely uncomplicated ...)
@@dirgniflesuoh7950 well a guy who'd replace his wife with a robot definitely wouldn't think childcare is difficult lol
@@prettynpetty8342 Well, for him, a wife without any interests other but making the house beautiful, spoiling him with everything he needs day and night and taking care of the kids so that he does not have to, life becomes a lot easier. And who cares for her? And that is the whole point that that movie makes...
Something that has always confused me about the whole "women are now in the workplace" line is, weren't they always? I remember my mom telling about how she kept working at fast food places even after she first got married in college. Her mom worked in factories back in the 1940s and 50s. The whole middle class stay at home mom thing was really just a flash in the pan brought about by the Post War economic boom. Even then it wasn't available to everyone because minority women all over were still working and also had to carry out their domestic duties. Even then that American Dream was very short lived for White Americans as well. Its funny seeing the manosphere say "retvrn" and post a image that was originally created as an ad for deck paint. Those images of life back then are about as real as those dumb Hipster ads we used to see all over in the 2010s. Its not real, never was.
Which... Don't Worry Darling points out, the 1950s people are nostalgic for is about as real as the simulation. It never actually existed.
Only the fortunate ones got to stay at home to care for their families
Before WWI, only 20% of the workforce was female. It wasn't uncommon for unmarried, working-class women to find employment in a very narrow field of "acceptable" occupations, but the social expectation was always: "women belong in the home". Service? School marm? Retail? Okay, if you must, but *professions* were not on the table, and women were generally expected to be dutiful, domestic bang-maids once married. Nothing else.
I mean, we're talking about a patriarchal structure that was so insecure it criminalized women wearing pants, ffs. Just look at the panic in old anti-suffragette posters. Men were freaking the fuck out because women wanted to go to rallies; it would've been ludicrous to think 95% of adult women would have careers! (At least, until the workforce shifted again in WWII.. which was promptly followed by "k thx, war's over, get back in the kitchen now.")
Poor women ave always worked, there was no other option. it was middle and upper class women that didn't have too, they are the ones that fought to have theh choice to work if they wanted too
@@cyber_dildonics I wouldn’t trust statistics like that, women were working, not as career-women but as factory workers. Same as children. There was a tragedy in the 1800s where a ton of women died in a factory fire.
“She worked and loved her work… but that’s not a character”
That’s such a great line and it sums up a lot about what falls so flat with women who are written to be Empowered. It’s this hollow image that doesn’t care about or explore who the woman actually is. It’s just a different shell of standards she’s supposed to live up to. It feels so frustrating when a film or novel or whatever claims to be feminist but doesn’t actually care to understand the woman in question and what she’s actually going through in the situation that’s been established.
And i also feel that the movie didn’t even convince us, the audience even a little bit that her working almost 24/7 was enjoyable
For me i thought she was 10 happier in the simulation…
@@antonia3288 right? A different version of this film would have had her escape at the midway point, and fail to convince the public of the dangers of what's going on, attempt to return to her normal life only to decide, in a defeatist way, that the only happiness is fake happiness.....and join Wildes character as a fully aware character in the simulation.
So it’s okay for most male characters to be written that way since the beginning of time?
@@moxxibekk Now that would have been a more interesting movie.
@@Comprehendingkiersten This is such a textbook strawman that idk whether I should laugh or cry knowing someone seriously posted it online?? Kiersten, darling, with all the sympathy possible, please do try to think. It keeps the brain alive
What I find sad is that even in 2022 we can't get a nuanced analysis of homeworker vs career women. Forcing women in either way is wrong. At the same time some women genuinely want to stay home and we don't need to shame them for it if it's their choice.
As a SAHM thank you for this. Feminism should be all about choice. I have an post graduate degree but once I married I realized it made more financial sense for me to stay home. I plan to homeschool my daughter and we plan to do a lot of traveling so this is what works for our family. I definitely consider myself a feminist and my husband and I share the house work and he is a very active parent.
And realize and accept that partners who don't identify as women also have this option. It's getting better but the idea of a stay at home father is still generally looked down upon.
The biggest problem is the way women's work is denigrated and underappreciated in general. It's assumed that women should be the ones doing all the homemaking and childrearing in general and many come to resent the expectation. When this attitude comes from other women, it's worse. There's probably a little class resentment thrown in there too, given that most families can't afford to have one parent staying home these days.
Also this needs to be paired with class analysis. Too many women genuinely want to stay home with their kids, but simply can't - or can't afford to have kids in the first place. I know too many families who are working poor - kids would probably be better with a parent at home or at least a consistent professional caregiver. But even with two parents working full time, they're barely making ends meet. You cannot live safely on minimum wage.
No matter how burned out, exhausted, or physically sick you are, you can't quit. Nobody comes home to a clean home and a nice meal because there is no time.
Home you get the bare minimum - eat *something* and sleep, if you even get that- then you gotta go to work again. Everyone's miserable. Staying at home to parent is a fantasy - one that can stoke extreme jealousy against the people wealthy enough to afford the single-income lifestyle.
We just have to pay housewives for the work they employ, tbh
We're like on the fifth wave of feminism now. How come the 70s movie can get it right but DWD can't. Those comments by Olivia about sex scenes made me feel so uncomfortable.
I can actually explain that. Although im not a feminist per se. (for the sake of this comment I’m a poc woman myself). Because they lived it at the time so they knew EXACTLY what they wanted and how they felt. Now we don’t actually have the same issues. Can things be better? ABSOLUTELY. but let’s get real it is better. I had great aunts who were children of actual slaves and they even told me things were WAYYYY better now than then. So what’s happening is people (as one commenter put it) guessing what life SHOULD be like based on what they THINK it actually was. Basically not doing research and comparing contrasting the different times. Or asking those who lived it and how they feel now vs then. Instead they watch leave it to beaver and go off that. So we get…… this. Instead of good compare and contrast and how certain aspects affect women and men.
I’m probably not making sense but that’s my take.
Because we are in a political turmoil in which womanhood is being redefined/appropriated, and in exchange, it’s leaving women in the dark and afraid of speaking up with concise ideas that can offend those appropriating our experience. Hollywood in exchange is afraid to step on toes and just casts a wide net that doesn’t say anything in the end. In other words, we are back to where we started.
Check out black Christmas from the 70s and then the newer one, the 70s are surprisingly ahead more often than you'd expect
@ArticWolf9210 There is clearly an element of murkiness that comes from broadening a movement to tackle the root of social issues versus targeting clear legal discrimination, but I don't really accept that they don't know what they want. All the talk I hear about "feminism" is not dealing at all with what contemporary academics are talking about. To the extent it adresses the literature at all, it's still talking about the past because that was the direction that pushed from the intellectuals into the public consciousness. Not now. Unlike the modern Racial Justice movement where we do see that relationship. I suspect it's because Racial Justice never had quite the same Capitalist recuperation as "Girl Power" to distort it.
@@TheCrusaders13 exactly. I have one theory as well. Like in 2022 we are facing more indivisible/abstract problem then systemic government problem like vote rights and credit cards ect ect that women did in 1970 (we still do with abortion law tho in 2022)
But now we have unpaid domestic labour that women do more,child birth & care
Not wanting to hire women cause they gonna take maternity leave ect ect
Now it’s a more mental protest then a protest in street.
I live in a third world country though we have voting right and can get credit card and all
We are still living 1970 mentally
Like women have voting rights but they Don't go to vote, can get a credit card but Financially unware/uneducated
Girls can get admitted to engineering,tech legally if they want to(but they usually dont cause they are told by their family)
It's still a male dominated field
And they still believe women are not good at math
Better become nurse Teacher
This brings me to how nurse/ teacher is one of the most important profession but still payed low and ironically women dominated
Regarding the part about the black family moving to Stepford, the book actually goes into a bit more detail and it's equally chilling. They arrive before Joanna is killed and she befriends Ruthann, the mom of the family. It also turns out that Ruthann writes very successful children's books, which Joanna's daughters love and Joanna praises for being about more than girls having tea parties.
When Joanna tries to escape at the end, she wants to find and warn Ruthann of the threat. Sadly (and inevitably) she fails. The book ends from Ruthann's POV meeting robot!Joanna in the grocery store and being unsettled by how cheerfully bland "Joanna" now is. The end of the book has her asking her husband if he can take the kids out for dinner, since she has some inspiration for her story and wants to write it down, leaving her no time to cook. We're told her husband is smiling and agreeable, but there's the lingering horror where we suspect it's all an act and like the other husbands, he'd rather have a sexbot maid with no personal identity rather than having to coparent while his wife works on a job that brings her tons of satisfaction and gives joy to countless children (and implicitly provides actually innovative material for little girls).
That's so chilling and upsetting :(
"She's a great wife. I come home and she exists. It's amazing."
"I adore my pet dog- I MEAN spouse 🥰"
Hmmmm and you wonder why ppl like you die alone with 500 cats. Maybe if you just focused on 1 job instead of 2-3 jobs like a “girl-boss” then you wouldn’t be so miserable.
That man was too stupid to realize how dumb he sound.
"The least ambitious person I know." Sir, and that's a good thing?! 😂
So the 2004 movie sands off the feminist-edge of the original by blaming it on feminism (fuckin' yuck) and DWD uses the themes of Stepford but has nothing to say. It wants to be Get Out, but has no point.
That's the best TLDR summary honestly
I was wondering about this; the original seems to be a lot more interested in the whole point of the original story, whereas the 2004 version (which is the one i saw) is kind of a hapless, bloodless remake that isn’t interested at all in that.
Really recently I had actually tried to watch the 2004 one, since it was one of those movies that your parents had on as a kid but you weren't old to watch yet, and I got curious. I could hardly make it past the first half hour. Between Stepford Wives, Wicker Man, and The Out of Towner's, I keep finding stuff where the 70's versions are mad superior lmaooo
It’s also a dumb comedy that was rewritten and reshot so much with all the production issues so it’s not meant to be classy think piece
I haven't seen the original but I remember seeing the 2004 in the theater and thinking wtf did I just watch. It had the plot there but turned it into a mindless comedy. I felt like DWD would've been such a great movie but couldn't put my finger on where it was lacking (other than the ending, that just pissed me off) until I watched this.
I need to check out the original.
The sex scenes being promoted as « female pleasure » while being against the women’s will is just disgusting. Same with trying to cast a guy with an SA lawsuit to play Jack
Styles has an SA lawsuit against him?
@@littlemissmello no. Styles wasn't the only one cast to play Jack; initially Shia Labeouf was cast as Jack, and he has SA lawsuits against him. Initially Olivia Wilde tried to convince him to stay on, but then did a 180 and said she let him go because she has a "no assholes rule".
I don't know if I have this thought fully made, I think Gone Girl falls into this conversation in some way as a revision of the stepford wife idea-- amy dunn in that movie buys into the traditional marriage project, in effect agrees to be her husband's "robot" but when her husband breaks what she sees as their agreement about their roles she sees it as her right to punish him for it-- the whole famous cool girl speech is amazing in that regard because while she's as unhinged as glenn close in fatal attraction, shes also sort of not wrong-- you cannot expect unconditional love in a marriage when the roles are based on rigid gender expectations
Love!
Yess that last part it’s what I tried to tell my spouse. Where is the space for love if we have to stay in character at all times. I cannot be angry and express it because it ‘isn’t feminine’ SCREW THAT. If I’m in a relationship I’m in it to love and be loved, wholly, not to play a role like it’s some play.
it might seem obvious, but I've never heard/thought of that last bit!
Agreed. And I gotta say, I watched this with my mom. And we both had our fair share of traumatic experiences due to the societal order of things. As the movie ended, we had a small talk and we both agreed that we fell on Amy's side. And dare I say we felt almost an admiration. Like in a fantastical sense, we'd want to be like her, but due to moral issues we wouldn't (like murder, manipulation, etc). Her partner watched this with us, and he couldn't understand why, the movie's point etc despite him being a smart fella, who always reads, evolves etc, and is a person who indeed has deeper respect for women than 90% of males in my country. I'd go on and on cause this brings many things for conversation, but the point is, aside from the morality of Amy's actions, we get it, and we felt what was being said.
@@user-hl1ct3yh1r omg yeess
I actually loved Dont Worry Darling until the last 15 min...I wish they had spent a little less time on the build up and watching the everyday going ons and the parties and more time on the ending/pay off. I want to know more about how the tech works and why they don't keep the women in a facility so they can be taken care of by nurses etc...there could have been so much good unravelling if they focused more on the end and less on watching Harry Styles dance like bloody Pinocchio for the Harry stans. Loved the idea and how beautiful it was shot and the acting really was great...the script fell short..they just couldn't explain their world building.
Facts, and it was weird that Olivia Wild was trying to compare us living in a capitalistic society and the feelings of entrapment we may feel and how we have to choose with the literal captive hostage situation those women were in… like that analogy only works from her characters point of view and the men, but we never really got to see theirs… Plus, It would’ve been nice to see her actually wake up. I know she does wake up, but ending on the symbolism definitely misses a cathartic moment of “oh fuck, what is she gonna do now” that could make your heart drop.
Honestly, I thought it would have improved the movie a lot if they just did away with the twist element, gave that info to the audience upfront and we then split the point of view between Alice and Jack. Alice, we get a sense of tension from her trying to discover what the audience already knows just out of reach for her and the work Jack does to maintain the illusion both in and out of the simulation. It creates a similar thematic bridge in which this perfect happy couple is independently working against each other’s goals and it makes Jack’s motivation feel a lot more organic when given the time to breath.
@@micahcook2408 I agree with this. I do think though that the ending gives that symbolism. She wakes up strapped to a bed beside her now dead husband. Freed from the simulation, but there's still a long way to go to 'get free.'
This I how I feel too. I was really enjoying the movie for the first hour, but then it REALLY started dragging and I kept waiting for the payoff that wouldn't come. In Get Out, they got us to the twist early enough in the movie that we got to explore all the science & implications of this gruesome secret society, and we had our questions answered. In DWD I'm sitting here screaming at the TV, 'Why did frank's wife stab him?? Who is going to take care of her body now?? She's gonna die of dehydration within the next 3 days!" Considering the twist basically rendered the movie into a 2 hour Black Mirror episode, we deserved more insight into the tech, the twisted philosophy, how it was all built, etc. "It was VR the whole time" is the new "and then they woke up and it was all a dream", it's not enough on its own and we deserved more.
Yeah i totally agree. Was the plane crash ever explained? Or was it just there for an excuse for her to find headquarters?
I think a good modern remake of the Stepford Wives would highlight both that women are expected to be earners and do the same level of domestic work as before. AND how paid domestic labor still undervalued and workers are easily exploited because of that.
Yea, women nowadays have more on their plate than ever before and yet we supposedly should be happy. We’re too tired to be happy.
ABSOLUTELY! Men want wives to provide a second income A N D do the domestic work, too. They generally refuse to do more domestic work, so the wife has 2 jobs. Not my idea of a good deal. I was miserable while working full-time and coming home to a very demanding baby and a lazy husband. I worked from 5:30 am until 11 pm for months. I know ì am not the only woman to have been in such a situation.
I think that was touched on in DWD. She’s supports them working insane hours at a high pressure job because he is unemployed. Meanwhile he is so unhappy because when she comes home from a 30 hour shift and she hasn’t figured out what to make for dinner and doesn’t want to have sex during her six hour break.
That’s my only real problem with DWD. It should have been a Netflix short TV series.
@@brooklynnmcloud1470 Yeah, I agree that scene touched on thr double load wives are pressed to keep. Which leads to one of the plot holes of Don’t Worry Darling, amongst other important questions we either don't get answers or receive unsatisfied answers to: if Jack is unemployed, how in the heck is he able to pay for their simulation?
As far as DWD being a TV series, that's interesting. It would definitely delve into who these women are and how they got in the simulation.
@@jacindaellison3363 Well i mean it looks like he got the motivation to find a job to live in a storage unit on cans of tuna
I'm so glad you started by talking about The Stepford Wives first because I think DWD is emblematic of a larger problem and that's everyone in 2022 thinking they're the first people to have thought up these ideas or these criticisms. No one wants to do the reading. There's so much that has already been discussed 30, 40, 50 years ago and even further back re feminism, queer theory, socialism, etc. Seeing all these stay at home girlfriends on TikTok, who are just content creators selling an ideal that isn't sustainable for anyone, and having thousands of young women proport to want that and it's like banging your head on the wall... Is anyone even remotely listening to anything that was said? These women, in the 1975 movie and their IRL contemporaries, were trapped in a simulation, the simulation being a life they were told was going to make them fulfilled but fucking didn't. They were denied personhood because that messed up the aesthetic.
A resounding success of patriarchy and an education system that calls discussing consent "sexualizing children".
I agree with most of your points but TikTok stay at home girlfriends are more a symptom of capitalism run amok combined with a society where gender equality hasn't actually been achieved. When a woman has to work 30% harder than a man and men are already overworked to the breaking point, it makes sense that some would rather opt out altogether. It is ironic that the tiktok gfs are advertising "not working" when in fact their vlogging/influencing is their job/source of income.
Still, I wouldn't throw shade at them since the arguments for the sustainability of the lifestyle sound eerily similar to ones thrown at artist and writers. Unemployment also happens to those with careers after all.
YES. The short cultural memory of ideas is so frustrating. I had a person acting like intersectional feminism was this weird new fangled thing and it’s like… Sojourner Truth was talking about this in the 1850s…
@@AN-sm3vj yeah it's absolutely capitalism run amok but also, people have to take accountability for the harm they perpetuate. The SAHG that went viral on Twitter the other day, she and her boyfriend bought up property in Puerto Rico. There's a law (Ley 22) that influencers, real estate developers, and other monied people have been taking advantage of that allows them to live in PR and not pay taxes. It's been displacing Puerto Ricans. So not only does she have a job (content creator) which she's lying about, but she's also part of the problem re gentrification in PR. And also, the aspirational middle class white women of the mid century were also exploiting the working class: the WOC employed as domestic help.
@@quadling3521 yes! Reading Ida B Wells was like holy shit Black women have been saying this forever
The lack of an intimacy coordinator (at the request of the director OW) is probably the most horrific fact of this whole train wreck - especially cause on top of that she then promoted it as a movie about female pleasure. When it’s not?! Just harmful AF
It's also kind of gross to think about the fact that Harry Styles was literally fucking Olivia Wilde behind the scenes, while Olivia was directing repetitive sex scenes between Harry and Florence Pugh without an intimacy coordinator. 🤢 Something seems excessively voyeuristic about that.
Agreed. The women were basically being raped/molested without even knowing it.
Thats horrific. Intamcy coordinators are meant to make it look good yes, but they are MORE about making sure everyone feels comfortable and safe.
And the fact that the women are never able to consent meand it can never be about pleasure
You just made this up lol
Can we talk about how the black girl in a white media always gets the worst physical abuse? Margaret from DWD slitting her throat and falling to her death. Tabatha from Riverdale getting shot repeatedly. Laena Velaryon getting burned alive. These are all examples from this year and far worse than what the white women of the same show receive
idk about laena lmao that was an honourable targreyen death which is traditional, but i noticed that with dwd yuh
Laena died a Dragonrider's death, on her own terms, in defiance of dying in childbirth. She's was an honorable character. I do believe she was not explored enough
@@recoveringintrovert717 yuh considering the ways people die in the asoiaf universe hers is a kind one that has nothing to do with her skin colour in this partcular case
I’d say it’s a big part of that old horror movie trope where there’s a token black person there but they never make it as the final girl even if they do everything right by the standards of the horror movie they’re in
@@suesylvester8206 people keep saying that, but it’s still so grizzly compared to what happens to the other women in this show. Also her sexually propositioning Daemon at like 9 was weird. Its just things they’d never have a white actress do/endure
We only want to be in relationships where we only need to depend on love
Not a relationship where we have to depend on his car, shelter, money, or physical strength
Who wouldn't want to be loved for being themselves?
So deep yet the world dances at the drums of bs socail rules that makes everyone miserable and when a group rises up to correct the oppressive system it is met with resistance brutality and threats
I’m glad you talked about the original Stepford Wives, ‘cause as a feminist horror fan this movie scared me in ways no movie had ever scared me before or since. I watched it in my early 20s not knowing the plot and it TERRIFIED me, for all the reasons you talked about in the movie, and because of how plausible it felt given the way men react to the slightest feminist advance in society. It’s scary that it is still relevant to this day…
Talking about feminist movies, I was pleasantly surprised by Barbarian. I felt it showed the chasm of life experience between men and women under patriarchy in a really smart way.
Great observation. I liked Barbarian and liked that feminist edge to it as well.
I'm in my early 20s and even tho I watched all the previous films Don't worry darling really terrified me. Because, even with all the flaws the script has and the chaos of the ending, I actually know men that listen to those podcasts. I live in Eastern Europe and there is an active movement of men bashing modern society and saying to other people that women choose to have careers because they were brainwashed. All the Andrew Tate followers. Now, as much as I find it ridiculous and I think they're crazy, there are a lot of people that follow them and as if 10 years ago I was concerned by equal opportunities and sexism, I'm starting to really be afraid of men. And I love men. And I feel things can go out of hand. I wish the film analyzed more of that and showed a realistic view of point of why this dystopian town was created. Now with the horror effects, action scenes and built aesthetic it seems more like a freak show, a horror fantasy that missed to make a real comment on the social questions it raised.
@@mariapetrova1294 I just finished watching Don't Worry Darling and it is disturbing. I've seen some of those videos by men who are trying to convince people to go back to the way things were 50 years ago. They need to understand that we are never going back so they need to figure out how to handle equality for women. The sad part is it shows how men see male-female relationships as one against the other rather than a partnership where both people have input. I think women will get this movie and most men won't.
@@mariapetrova1294 agreed, here's to hoping someone will take that task of portraying that dystopia for a modern The Stepford Wives 75 🥂
@@mariapetrova1294, my dear, there is an old (Victorian) saying: "Do not trust any man. They are not worth it!" It is essential that girls and women are taught this truth: men will do *anything* (and I mean anything) to get laid and have a maid in white aprons at home. They will lie like nobody's business and completely without shame. They will manipulate and deceive...just to get an access to a woman. I am originally from Slovakia (living abroad), about 20 years older than you. When I was a kid, I heard this proverb: "They (the men) are singing softly to the bird (a woman) they want to catch." Yeah, they sing prettily in the beginning...only to turn into malevolent, abusive monsters the moment they "own" a woman. Are all men like that? Let's look at the statistics: 9 out of 10 women feel unhappy/unheard in the relationships. 35-40% of all women in stable relationships (e.g. long-term partnership, married) are physically, mentally and/or s*xually abused. Only about 3% (!!!) of women live in the perfect, hallmark movie relationship. You have higher chances of winning the "euro jackpot" than finding a decent man.
Maybe instead of focusing on those sex scenes and making everyone look pretty, Olivia Wilde should have focused on the characters and the plot and not just what she thought looked creepy on Black Mirror.
Made a lot of movies have you?
Any that I might have heard of?
And do a better job at critiquing the incels. I don't know much about them, but they claim they aren't sexually attracted to women and thus take it out on them and men who are the opposite. I had NO idea Wilde was using this film to call them out, as well as Peterson. I've never heard his stuff, so I'm not defending his arguments, btw. If Jack was supposed to be who the men were, incels, then they got it wrong because he is attracted to Alice and vice versa. She just didn't want to have sex with him when he wanted it, which kills the movie's theme. The men just felt like one dimensional misogynists.
Black Mirror shouldn't even be compared to this movie imo. Every episode focused on a different theme and took the time to carefully craft the world and the characters. The world they were in wasn't always explained but they did a good enough job just telling a story that it didn't even matter. There was a pretty clear message in all the episodes that was built upon throughout the run time. There were so many fine details that added up to the full picture unlike this movie where they just threw in old timey outfits/hairstyles, Harry Stiles, and a 30 minute twist ending.
I feel like a lot of big movies that have come out recently follow the same pattern of DWD, the 'feminist' themes, the excessively done up characters (yes that's the point of this one that the women are supposed to be 'perfect' but even in the og Stepford Wives there were scenes where the main character wasn't made to look perfectly camera ready at all times), the poor world building and shallow storylines that are all just glossed over because the filmmakers have an idea for a message but they skip all the steps to tell the story through the characters themselves. This movie is all theme imo with no actual foundation.
I consider myself a feminist/womanist/humanist/whatever you want to call it but all the big 'feminist' movies that have come out in the past few years have sucked. I wish they would just make media showing women being strong and breaking the mold or literally just living and succeeding in life without screaming GIRLBOSS as loud as possible in my face.
Everything Everywhere All at Once wasn't even about feminism directly and was a better deconstruction of what expectations we imply on women, the stresses of the mundane, and freedom from the patriarchy whilst within it. That's insane. Wilde isn't lazy, just misguided. I think her next attempt, if she listens to criticism like this, would be so fun. Talk to people of color, explore something less tread. There's so much potential.
Not to mention that EEAAO also smashed the “masculinity is about being tough” idea to pieces. And that half the relationships given the most focus are between women, with one of them being the heart of the film.
@@animeotaku307 the more I discuss it the more I realize they all deserve multiple awards.
@@nailinthefashion truly the best movie released last year
@@justagirl36 Thank Goodness it got as Many awards as it did.
Michelle Yeoh is a Goddess...
lmao you're talking like Olvidia WIlde owes you something. You people with your collectivist mindset of everything's gotta be about "us" and "we" and "people of color" - it's creepy. Stop being NPC herds. be yourself.
This is a bit of a side topic but I do feel like Dramatic Irony has gone missing from modern tv and film recently, with much more of a trend of The Big Reveal taking its place.
There's nothing wrong with Third Act Shocking Reveals but I think more stories would benefit from earlier reveals and playing with tension or exploring the ramifications, especially when the twists aren't even that shocking.
THIS! I’m a theatre teacher and dramatic irony is what makes all great plays, well, GREAT. Everyone knew Romeo & Juliet were cursed to die from love before the action even started - the tension is in the characters’ handling of the info being revealed to THEM
Better writers need the spotlight for us to finally get the movies that scratch the itch to watch a passionate well done movie
Yea I feel like this reading thriller novels too. So much is withheld in order to make the REVEAL a shock that the twist isn’t meaningful at all. If a twist is really well done and executed you will watch that film or read that book over and over again because the thrill is in seeing that story in that light. But every story doesn’t need a big twist to be scary and suspenseful.
Yeah, just like in Knives Out.
This is going to be a weird comparison but Don't Worry Darling reminds me of the Joker film. Like... if your a teenager who's never seen Stepford Wives or the Matrix or don't have a basic feminist education its entirely possible that the film is mind-blowing to you with the ideas it brings up.
I agree with you. There are some movies that will be praised to high heavens because the audience has never seen anything like it (dispite it being a full genre) or because it's new and the older movies are "ugly"
I get this from a lot of A24’s popularity too.
perhaps that sometimes films are to be enjoyed and not overly analyzed. They do not need to be speweeing some feminist agenda nor super philosophical. ever think about that? Leave teenagers to enjoy the film they like, Joker is a solid film that people liked. They have proven so by going over and watching it in cinemas.
@@jobsmine You can still enjoy a film and critique it. Most media has a moral, even accidentally. Joker, for instance, highlights how underfunded mental health care is. That's a political statement.
@@d_alistair-years no i don’t think it’s a political statement. However it is a healthcare statement. Regardless of politics, the film focuses on the mental health aspect. This you don’t need to jump into politics. This is what i was stressing earlier in my comments. Not every fin has to be Political.
"Maybe Catherine Zeta knows something we don't" cracked me up. I love your videos so much
truly HA! i also had not known the details of what a jackass michael douglas was/those comments about feminists and playing a "weak" character... ugh! so yeah hopefully catherine zeta is getting something out of that relationship, who knows.
@@ChloeTheePayne From the start she let him know that he was being shit and that she requires better from an interested man.
I will die mad about Kiki Layne being cut from the film
We all will!
I’m more mad because of what they kept in instead. Great performances get cut; stories can only be so long. But to cut something so intriguing from an actress that did so well and leave in repetitive, meandering scenes that don’t even make sense in the end? That’s bad editing/decision making.
100%%%
she's the only reason i would've watched it and i;m so happy i decided to skip it i just hope she had to spend as little time on set as possible because that whole cast sounds evil as all hell
Something I do like about the '04 version is that Matthew Broderick's character chooses his wife, not a fantasy of her. He becomes an actual partner and ally. There is a reason they got together in the first place but they forgot. She considers his happiness and questions herself and he does the same and they end up closer for it.
It reminds me of my cousin's marriage. Her husband had a stay at home mom so he kind of expects that consciously or unconsciously but then he married a kick ass ex military woman so obviously he was attracted to that but he has trouble reconciling the two and it causes a lot of friction in their marriage. It's been 20 years and he still doesn't get it. The same battle over and over again. If he really wanted the traditional housewife then he married the wrong woman and I think he gets it and recognizes the benefits of having a strong partner but then he won't let go of these stupid limiting attitudes. He wants to have his cake and eat it too.
I think that's a problem with fourth wave feminism. Women feel like they have to do it all and they don't want to anymore. And a lot of guys were happy to kick back and allow it along with the resentment because it made their life easier.
Now where are we?
Lazy, depressed, and wondering why we're so lazy and depressed lmao
Or too ambitious and ideal
More and more radicalized with all the social movements pushing in either directsh
Psst! That's because "feminism" and any identity politics are not real and a design of certain dual-citizen ship havers to turn us all against eachother and fight forever, instead of aiming our collective energy at the actual problem.
I thought "Promising Young Woman" would fall under feminist filmmaking, although it offers a sorta bleak outlook on the whole situation it presents, it was a really interesting film that explored how trauma can effect people and a particularly female revenge plan that felt very different. I dont have the language to really talk about it in depth but id love to hear others opinions :)
I actually did a video about PYW, but I personally did not like the film because of the reasons you discussed. BUT I would also love to hear a video in praise of it
I consider "Hustlers" to be a feminist movie, but also has a similar flaw. A bad ending (Of course because it was about a true story).
Atm I can't think of one intentionally feminist movie that came out recently w/ a happy ending
@@starcherry6814 so true, the media LOVES portraying female anguish. I guess female love and exuberance isn't as marketable 😅
@@chlobo5594 I feel like it used to be but then those movies were labeled chick flicks and deemed lame. I avoided stuff like that for years because of it and then later ended up liking quite a few of them, and even shows in that vein like Gilmore Girls lol
@@starcherry6814 Birds of Prey? Yeah it's a little "girl power", just like movies about people with extreme social issues learning to be friends. That and it's just a Looney Toons movie with superhero characters which I love.
As bad as the 2004 Stepford remake was, the gay couple did hit on some issues that couples face. The whole Log Cabin Republicans of it all, the one partner hating his husband for being "too femme" and "too flamboyant," the push for assimilation from some gay (most often white) couples. The movie handled it badly but those are problems and they are worth examining.
Yes!! it was poorly handled, but it was still There. when you hear the other guys talking about WHY they work within this program it's obvious that his husband felt emasculated by having such a femme partner, something that can be a very real problem within those communities. and then you hear the final boss admit she was going to fix the men next, and afterwards it hits you. he was the prototype. that's what she was going to do to ALL of them, once they were complicit enough.
I thought Bros was gonna swing for those walls. Safest love tap taken this year imo
*Dave Rubin has entered the chat*
Fatal attraction needs an update, like shit lets go full blown "this man has made horrible life choices and doesn't want to face the consequences of his actions because he is such absolute trash"
Gone girl
It's getting A Miniseries Remake with Lizzy Caplan as Alex Forrest.
@@eamonndeane587 Television? Nah, not for me, it might be censored.
@@farrellmcnulty909 It's going to be exclusive to Paramount Plus
we need more stories about women that are not career focous or super successfull in the work but still have drive and intelligence. There is more to feminism that empowerment thought work.
Yes, there should be!!!
One small thing that really gets under my skin about DWD is the emphasis on the fact that Alice loves her job. I feel like the film uses that to say “see how bad it is for her?? If she doesn’t get out of this simulation she won’t get to do the thing she loves 😥”. My issue is that a lot of women don’t like their jobs but they wouldn’t be happier in a simulation lol. I wish the film had focused on Alice losing her financial independence-which is something married women in the 70s didn’t have.
I think it was emphasized because he screamed at her that she was unhappy and she was working all the time. So she yelled that she liked her work.
What she yells is “It was MY life! You don’t get to take that from me!”, asserting her right to self determination, to make her own choices- even if she was, at the moment, kind of unhappy. (This is why I think it was a great idea to place her in her residency, the hardest part of any doctor-in-trainings career)
Fr. Micheal Douglas is so not my type. How he kept being casted as a "sexy" man is beyond me. Thank God, that era is over.
😂🙅🏾♀️
Looks like the OG Stepford Wiwes was a true masterpiece.
One thing I noticed about the 80s and 90s: it didn't take much for middle-aged white men to be declared "hot"
@@jessicavictoriacarrillo7254 Fr.
Kevin Costner comes to mind. 🤷🏿♀️
I "settled" for the 70s Stepford Wives in 2004 because I couldn't get a chance to see the new one with Nicole Kidman, et al. I found the DVD of the original for 10 bucks, watched it, and fell in love with it. I've since seen it countless times. It's a classic perfect film.
The age difference seriously lol I watched Basic Instinct and his casting didn't make sense
For 2nd wave feminists (70s) like myself, I found the backlash bizarre and out of touch with the economic reality of women AND men. My husband absolutely wanted me to work to help us pay the madass bills of the 80s AND we both wanted access to daycare for our children. He wasn't the least bit interested in supporting a wife full-time until he was retired or dead. He wanted hobbies and free time and get a fucking day off too. The Greed-is-Good dudes created a world that made it very hard for blue collar men to be the sole support. So, yeah, they got over "it" if that's what they had to do and supported their wives working. Hell, mine basically said "so when do you go back to work?" It seems to me that privileged white men wanted to paint all men with the same brainbrush, but nope. Economics did more to get women into the workforce, grant paternity leave and make other family-friendly advances than anything else.
It’s so funny you’re talking about the 04 movie cus I just watched it the other day. And what both frustrated and intrigued me is that it almost says something. It’s like right on the cusp of something before backing off into the whole “your husbands wouldn’t want to murder you so much if you weren’t such an ice witch” take. Like the reveal at the end that the orchestrator of it all was a white woman had me like “oh! that’s saying something!” But then when she explained her motivation, I was like… oh :/. Or the idea that men can’t handle their wives being more successful than them, and a woman having any kind of success means that they’re being emasculated; that could have really been explored in a meaningful way but like you said it’s framed as the women’s fault. It’s such a puzzling movie to watch because there are things I like but the execution was just yikes.
Totally agree. I think a movie that explores why women, particularly white women, buy into this narrative of aspiring to housewife status/nostalgia for the past would be really interesting. There are so many women we see every day supporting these talking points. And a movie that's in conversation with these ideas also could comment on how when people hold up the 50s/60s as their ideal they're leaving non-white women and LGBT women out of the picture. It's unfortunate that 2004 Stepford Wives doesn't follow through on this, and even more unfortunate that a later film taking inspiration from Stepford Wives like Don't Worry Darling doesn't capitalize on this idea either.
So, like Joker (2019)
The '04 Stepford Wives definitely feels like it's onto something, but just- doesn't quite understand the things it's focused on. I really like the two angles you pointed out. I think it also could have explored the idea that some women may feel that they *have* to be an "ice witch" to gain respect in the workplace, and that entering a traditionally male-dominated environment may necessitate adopting certain "masculine" traits- in other words, women have to overcompensate and out-men the men in order to be seen as an equal, or else risk being dismissed as "merely women". So the problem wouldn't be reduced to "women are acting like men when they should act like women, and that's Bad", it would be "women want respect, so they mimic unhealthy, traditionally masculine traits and attitudes in an attempt to get it (which tends to work for men), and that's Bad because these traits are bad regardless of who's doing it".
It also could have leaned into the idea that women just can't seem to win, regardless of whether they're "perfect housewives" or "driven career-women"- especially in a culture that has become accepting of women having careers and ambitions, but still assumes that she'll be primary caregiver to their children and take on the bulk of domestic labour. That way, you could echo the theme from the book and 70s film that "the Stepford husbands don't want their wives to be real human beings", but update it in a way that actually said something new. Essentially going from "you don't *get* to be anything, *except* a perfect wife" to "you *have* to be everything, *including* a perfect wife".
How was the protagonist of Don't Worry Darling successful in real life??
She was being exploited working long shifts at her job!!!!
Guess who owns most hospitals (and workplaces) men!!!!!!!
@@JishinimaTidehoshi huh? I mean I guess but she wasn't being exploited for being a woman she was being exploited as a medical professional, that's not a gender thing, all medical personell are overworked. And yet Alice says it herself, it was HER LIFE. She CHOSE to be a surgeon knowing the sacrifice and she loved it, becoming a surgeon is also quite difficult and a pretty big accomplishments so idk what ur on abt
I feel like Harry Styles was seriously miscast, but I'm a bigger fan of Chris Pine myself.
Wandavision had a better Stepford Wives aesthetic and one minor gripe I had is that they used "Twilight Time" for the table scene. You know the one. I'm being petty, I know!
I fully misunderstood the premise of DWD. I thought it was a historical fiction about atomic scientists. It... was not. Also, I love Glenn Close's skirt in that dance scene. I covet it.
It is worth pointing out that originally, the 04 version of Stepford did end similar the original film. But after a poor test screening, Paramount forced a ton of reshoots to change stuff. Which makes me think there is potentially a better film buried in there.
Ira Levin is so great at writing about people who have somehow been transformed or have exhibited insidious cult like behavior. It's the fear that everyone knows something that you don't. People seem to forget how horrifying that feeling can be. My first encounter with this kind of terror was after cheerleading tryouts when I was in 7th grade. After doing my routine I kept hearing people snicker and eventually they were full on laughing and pointing. It was something that was so incredibly frightening that I just knew it had to do with me and something I had done. I finally saw what they were laughing at and it was a sign on the stage where some of the letters had fallen and 'classes' was transformed to 'asses' and something as brilliant as that will never go unnoticed by a bunch of middle schoolers. That entire five minutes however, before I was let in on the fun, was one of the most memorably humiliating moments of my life. Ira Levin can invoke those feelings of terror perfectly in order for the reader to side with the protagonist.
16:45 If my husband said this about me, after all the years I spent in education and generally living my life before I met you and you say I'VE NEVER HAD AMBITIONS.....when you get home the house will be cold and empty
It's one of those quotes you hear and your body begins to physically reject what it is hearing as being said by an actual person. It's like bro you don't want a wife, you want a sex toy, but that wouldn't enable them to live out their pseudo slavery fantasy.
I don't understand how he wrote that, read it back to himself, and thought, "Yep, this is a total compliment to my wife. She'll love this!"
I don’t hate men but goddamn did that make me outrageously angry
I remember watching an interview with Glenn Close and several other female film critics who defended Fatal Attraction as a feminist film saying her character is strong and isn't just going to be used as a one and done weekend affair I always thought she was an interesting character but this was an interesting breakdown. Also yeah the biggest problem with Don't worry darling is that it didn't know what it wanted to say, and the characters were insanely underwritten especially Jack who was barely even a character.
Funny how she and Anne Archer were able to find some feminist substance in their characters
I've heard Close fought tooth and bones for that character to have more substance to it
@@kostajovanovic3711 that makes sense she always plays such strong complex women. I understand the whole critique of her character being a "threat" but I've seen that movie multiple times and I always blame the husband 😂
Yes Gwen made up a backstory for Alex and intended her to be strong despite her problems. Amazing performance, but Alex ultimately comes off as just cray cray.
My instincts tell me to bet on White Feminism for why.
Ups..
Are you American?
Being the only black woman in a group of white feminist women, you are correct. They basically traumatized me. I opened up my eyes and did a lot of reflecting after that…
@@kmhkennedy why does that matter?
@BringBackCyParkVendingMachines I don't know if you've seen Blackish, but they had an episode where it discussed how the white feminists really felt about inclusion of Bo and her interacial friends when it came to their causes.
Not gonna lie, I still love the 2004 one but that’s mostly cause I could not take it seriously. Lol
Great analysis as always 💕💕💕
It def has moments where it is enjoyable. I was just so frustrated by it after watching it back to back. XD
I actually really like that the 2004 version pairs them out at the end instead of the husband going through and killing his wife. You called it "her realizing that she just needed to be nicer to him" but I always saw it as a couple who had lost each other emotionally finally managing to communicate. Love isn't just a thing that you get and is there forever, you have to work to maintain it, and there are bound to be moments in life when it's neglected. Men aren't all monsters who are happy to kill their wives in order to get the perfect robotic version of womanhood, and I appreciate this guy being stopped one step before incel-dom and appreciating the person he fell in love with, recovering that love instead of falling in the alpha male bucket or societal pressure.
The Glenn Close twist is a travesty though, what a joke.
Yeah, but sometimes you just need to let the oppressor group be the villains. If there are no "good men" for the audience to identify with, they're more likely to identify and empathize with the women. We should be allowed to have movies that specifically delve into the horror of patriarchal abuse without any #notallmen cop-outs.
@@cussedcat28 You could argue the original Stepford Wives IS that. Remakes don't need to replace the original work, but can be seen as an interesting juxtaposition. They come at the same story from slightly different angles, both of which are worth exploring
I'm 100% with you on cleaning. I HATE to clean and they only reason why I do it is because of our cats and people occasionally come over.
Why is cleaning such a necessity? I wish I never had to do it.
I like cleaning for myself sometimes because I like the progress of it. But I hate cleaning for someone else
@Ks I know why. I just wish I didn’t have to keep doing it.
Someone invent self-cleaning furniture and such already!
I don’t like it either. The way I deal with it is by putting my AirPods in and playing a music playlist. It makes the time go by a lot faster.
Y’all just some dirty bums
Thank you for calling Don't Worry Darling a nothing burger because that's exactly what it is. I felt so gaslit watching interviews of people talking about it and making it sound so profound but the best part of this movie is the aesthetics, and they're not even that accurate. They really thought this was a social commentary but it was lacking so much detail and depth and like you said to reveal the truth at the end when we all knew it was coming they were just filibustering with weird shots of Florence Pugh being self destructive. The actors did their best with what they were given. The dialogue could've been much better and I hated the dinner party scene idc how profound olivia wilde thought it was it was just weird and uncomfortable and making no actual point
Ah yes, crazy-womb, an affliction so many of us feminists and girl-bosses suffer from
That and wandering-womb, where the uterus gets confused because no baby and migrates to other parts of the body looking for the fetus it needus
@@emilyrln 😂😂😂
I prefer having a doom-womb, nothing grows there and all who knock on its doors are cursed
@@Nopenopenope6969 That does sound like the ideal breeding ground for a xenomorph. You know come to think of it, where's the girl boss xenomorph movie?
Don't know if anyone has answered this yet, but for Stepford Wives 2004, the plot point with the wives was originally intended to follow the original (there's a deleted scene with Bette Midler floating around the web that confirms this intent). Though I haven't been able to find a source on this, but according to the internet, it was either poor test screenings or too many cooks in the kitchen that caused the production to scrap the idea and go with what was in the released film. But as you noted, the team didn't work to fix the continuity problems once they decided to change this during reshoots so that's why there's scenes like ATM wife in the film still left over.
I always took the brain chip to be kind of a lie that was used to smooth over the ugly truth?? Because like how are you going to get the brain out to put the chip in it anyway? Maybe they put the brain into the robot. But I thought that there was definitely a liet going on there
I have only seen the 04, havent heard the 74 before this video. I have to said that I have no doubt that 74 is better in many ways but i kinda like that they didnt kill them in 04.
Oh, okay. Until I read your response I never did understand whether they were robots like the original despite the ending saying that they weren’t.
I reckon there's bones of a good story in how Jack insists all Alice's pleasure come from him! He puts her in a simulation so things will be perfect. He demands she enjoy sex, destroying her newly laid table in the same way he destroyed her working life! I think Bunny should have been Frank's wife, who knows, but she also knows he'll murder her kids/put her in that star trek black mirror episode if she says anything. I want to redraft this movie and either recast Styles with Robert Pattinson or Daniel Radcliffe, someone who can do weird intensity both positive and negative
But, that's not how this movie thinks about women or about power
My big retweak idea was to just completely undo the twist aspect, establish upfront that it's Jack running a simulation and split the narrative between Alice and Jack's point of view. The audience gets a sense of tension from watching Alice constantly on the verge of figuring it out but always remaining out of reach and by seeing the work Jack puts in to keep Alice in there and to keep the operation going with in and out of the simulation we get a more organic view of his character and the dynamics in the simulation vs in real life. That and it takes on new thematic territory where this happy, perfect couple are actually independently working against each other's interest.
my ex was like that. all “i care about your pleasure” but if i didn’t orgasm he would always draw the conversation on how it made him feel and require comfort. i understood in part where he was coming from, but at the same time, dude I am the one who isn’t getting to orgasm here. i deserve the comfort. and you keep making my orgasms all about you and about how you don’t feel masculine. and then he’d do other dumb things to try to get back that feeling of masculinity he’d tied to me, like manipulating and eventually trying to coerce me into doing things i wasn’t comfortable with or acting suspicious that i wasn’t orgasming as if it was some sort of manipulation to deny him the supposed joy of making me feel good. like man maybe you just suck at making me feel good and it isn’t about me at all. maybe not all vaginas are the same and you need to listen to me and not act emasculated every time i tell you what i actually want. i really wish someone would explore this concept of being with a man who demands you enjoy sex. how emasculating it is for men when you “dare” not be pleasured by them. i was like bruh it’s not that complicated. i want to orgasm, you just can’t make me. it was completely exhausting.
yall got me so scared to watch this movie cause everyone says the ending RUINED IT
Hi Harri, ever seen The Stepford Wives (both versions)?
@Ks No the ending literally ruined everything.
Like the ending has a loooot of consequences that make the movie definitely not possible..
It was RUSHED and DISAPPOINTING. All this build up that's ends like a damp squib
It wasn’t that bad but the ending left huge plot holes
@@cherchehacknostale no, it’s not that bad
The 1975 version of The Stepford Wives is one of my favorite horror movies, and I'm glad more people are bringing attention to it!
I only have a soft spot for 2004 Stepford Wives because parts of it were filmed in my neighborhood…me and my friends would get high and watch it on mute and do the Leo pointing meme whenever they showed a place we knew
"He went to see his ex-wife and five of her new boyfriends" - that line had me cackling over here far too much
I often feel that media that feels dated, Stepford Wives 04's girl boss and post-feminist messages, is better than saying nothing like DWD. SW04 got me started on the road to feminism, and it has been a long journey so far with much still left to be learned.
29:50 “…but ignore that the villains of his ire are non-binary people, trans women, and women of color…”
Trans men belong on this list as well!
I apologize I should have said trans people! You are absolute right.
But men don't hate transwomen. Lumping them in with other marginalized groups is ridiculous. They aren't marginalized at all.
Society places their needs and wants above those of real women. The whole "transwomen are women' narrative is the Stepford Wives all over again. Transwomen have gained so much power and prominence because everybody knows they are actually men. It's their ultimate fantasy to replace women, first by making even the word " woman" verboten, unless it refers to them. The trans agenda is the mens rights movement in an fake feminine facade
@@simbahunter8894 I don’t know why you picked my comment to reply to, but fuck off 😊
Trans men hold such a strange position in patriarchy and feminism and it is defined by constant exclusion imo
@@nolan-zs5mc doesn't being trans man make them actually men? So... toxic masculinity and patriarchy apply unless we agree that there are good men and good women and toxicity is found on both sides and patriarchy is being stomped if it actually exists because women are truly strong and empowered unless you decide to take those away. We should own who and what we are right? I dont really think it's complicated
I think part of my personal disappointment was that I find the actual "secret city" atomic project towns that the story uses as a backdrop SUPER interesting and was hoping the twist would have something to with that, but alas.
The fiction podcast Ars Paradoxica does have a really interesting twist on that if anyone is interested
This was awesome! I've watched your videos since high school (they actually helped kickstart my love of film and I'm pursuing a degree in creative writing/cinema & media studies), and your work is always amazing. I love your analyses on media, how important it is to critique it, and the long-standing social structures (especially antiblackness, racism, homophobia, and sexism) that impact its creation. You're an awesome person, and I hope you keep creating work you love - please take care!
This means so much to me. Really and truly. And congrats on your own career and work! Make sure you keep loving it xx
There is an element of DWD that isnt present in the Stepford wives that I think its possibly the only part of the film that has something significant to say. The men are trying to "provide" for their wives. In the ML mind everything he did was to make her happy and he was willing to work very hard to achieve that. I think that's why most of their sex scenes were about her pleasure, its an extension of that belief. Ultimately, of course, the issue is he had no idea what makes his wife happy. That would require things like communication and honestly. It is entirely possible that some of the women would have willingly agreed to live in the simulation, like the neighbor, but they aren't given the option to choose that life.
The issue is that her humanity and individuality are inconvenient for him and he thinks taking her autonomy is a viable solution rather than being heinous unforgivable torture...
Aahh so glad you brought up the fact that we only find out about DWDs actual story so late in the movie! It bothered me so much but none of my friends had an issue with that. Blergh. Super good video, i feel heard
This is such an interesting deep dive! I watched a review or two that didn’t mention Stepford Wives as the inspiration and this makes so much more sense, both in the choices they made and the many ways it fell flat, with that context and history behind it. Thank you so much for sharing!
I feel like if DWD followed the original script where it's more about an abusive husband drugging and putting his wife, who was done with the marriage and wanted a divorce, in the simulation, the message would've been a modern version of SW, especially with how prevalent men views divorces initiated by the wife as a "violent" act and losing power, so they act violently back to gain that power back.
But instead they edited it to hell because "we don't want to make Harry a bad guy" 🙄 As if there aren't already fanfics of the man being horrible **coughAftercough** He'll be just fine. Let the Wonderbread be different personalities if he really want to do acting more in the future!
It's very interesting me how two people of roughly similar mindsets and political understanding can still come to very different conclusions and have very different experiences watching the same film. to me, the 2004 film does a lot of very relevant stuff with the material it has. the damage done was committed through the complacency of men who felt emasculated by their amazing wives, and the film ultimately tells them that they are WRONG to feel that way - that they have no right to force their wives to be these perfect stepford gals and if they were down to go through with that then they never REALLY loved them. the outright admission from the other men that, yeah, they DO just want their wives to be slaves. the fact that one wealthy white woman was willing to destroy countless lives, SAYING she wanted to make a better world, but ultimately it's painfully obvious she just wanted to live out her perfect traditional life fantasy. she didn't care about the women, she didn't care about the men, she outright admits she was going to fix all the men next - it was all her playing DOLLS with real life people, using patriarchy to her advantage to create this fantasy life for herself. something that wealthy white women do pretty fucking constantly if given the chance, even if not to this insane level. the inclusion of a highly stereotypical femme gay man, while having its definite problems, highlights another piece - he was a member of the men's club, he was a recognize man, and yet they STILL changed him. his gay partner felt emasculated from having a partner who was TOO STEREOTYPICAL. that's a very real issue for many gay men, and many queer people in general, that they constantly have to fight with not only the bigotry of the world but the bigotry that can exist within their own partners. it's not represented perfectly, but you FEEL the pain in seeing him turned into a boring regular man, and with the twist it becomes clear - he was the male prototype. all of them would eventually become that.
i guess this is all to say, while i don't find it perfect in any sense, i found the 2004 version of the movie hit a little closer to home for me, and i don't think it can be reduced to just "it's your own fault actually". after all, one could theoretically make the same argument for the 1975 film - it's your own fault for having opinions and a life outside of your wifely duties. that's the argument the men use to justify their abuse, not the actual message of the film. i don't need the film to perfectly frame and focus on its twist to feel the very familiar sting of being reminded there will always be women doing 'better' than me who will take full advantage of my weaknesses to live out their own fantasy, and they will side with oppressors we share to do it. i shudder to think what she would have done with trans people.
as for don't worry darling, there's definitely a lot less to say, i do agree on that. but i can't say the film said Nothing or didn't make me think, either? the argument right before she kills her husband really keeps me thinking, with the different way each character framed the same situation v.s. what we personally saw in the past. he tells himself he does it all for her, but clearly this is not true- ANY audience member can see very plainly he did it because he wanted access to her that he couldn't get. "for you" is his excuse, it's how he justifies this horrific situation to himself, but it's an obvious lie. we see the anger, the resentment, the tiredness, the constant need throughout the entire film to control. and the complete inability to recognize what he's truly done, something that we see in many real life abusers - he cannot comprehend that he has KIDNAPPED her, RAPED her, and stolen her life away from her without a second thought. the way consent is treated between the two in that one argument is so incredibly interesting to me because of how well it portrays the way situations like this feel on either end.
alice not having a ton of personality or core to her is, in some ways, kind of the point. with no memory to who she is or where she really came from or what she IS, with little to go on but her most core personality and the programming instilled in her, it's all completely lost. in the brief moments of memory she can grab, all she has is the trauma of what brought her here - something real life cult victims often struggle with after they manage to get out. the understand of who you are as a person can be lost, leaving you with only your instincts to survive. of course she's not an interesting person. she WOULDN'T be after this, not for a very long time, and it ceases to matter who she truly was because that has been stolen from her.
all of this is to say, i think when horror movies have this political edge to them, your own politics very strongly shape your viewing experience. what i find fascinating due to its accuracy or implications, others find boring because of its obviousness or inability to say anything further than 'this exists'. what i find to be perfect examples of real life struggles, others find laughable and considered as missing their mark. what i find to be a reminder of painful real world dangers and truths, others find to be blame-shifting propoganda. and i think all of these reactions are True in a way - there is no one single fully encompassing understanding with these things. i'm glad i took the time to listen to your thoughts, even if i can't agree with some of them.
I know I'm late to the party here but I'm really glad to see someone else viewing this movie the way I do. The really source of the horror, for me, is how absolutely unrepentant Jack is when confronted with the monstrosity of what he's done. He sounds like real-life incels trying to justify the way they abuse the women in their lives when he insists it was "all for her", even as he never once told her what was actually going on.
I fully agree with your comment and I believe the problem here is the reading of the films (Stepford Wives 04 and DWD). Showing a character's reasoning behind their actions doesn't mean the text is justifying them, just explaining them. When Glenn's character talks about her husband cheating and deciding to make this perfect world to make men be men and women be women we're obviously meant to disagree with her and see how far off from the truth she is (it's not her or feminism's fault that her husband cheated, he simply was an asshole). Also, the fact that the husbands who went along with the program are punished by their wives once they're no longer robots pretty clearly shows (at least to me) that the film condemns the men's ideas about masculinity and desire for control of their successful, hardworking partners. But idk, that's just me
17:02 "I come home and she's there" - Sir , That's a Cat ! , - me probably way louder then I should have in busy office.
this video was so well done, truly one of the biggest issues with dwd was that it seemed to think it existed separate and apart from any similar movies that had already explored those themes more successfully previously/not only did it add nothing to the conversation it seemed UNAWARE of the conversation and just convinced that tense vibes of like swimming montages would be the best way to be artsy i guess about making a point...? truly wild. and WOW YES in the review i did for my channel i also could not BELIEVE that the men in dwd need to actually leave the simulation to work a regular job in the irl world, holy MOLY that movie was such a mess 😂😂😂
I enjoyed the 2004 version of Stepford for the comedy. And honestly the gay couple touching on the desire some men in same sex couples have for their more feminine partners to butch up is something I still haven't seen addressed in most films or shows. Even explicitly gay ones. Though the movie doesn't really address it either. Either way the original is a horror masterpiece. We're simply not gonna get another like it.
even though you can talk about a flamboyant gay man being compared to women as something problematic, there's no denying there's a lot of internalised homophobia, sexism and misogyny even inside of the LGBT community, where every gender non-conforming trait is frowned upon in order to appease or simply not draw a lot of attention in a non-supportive society. Some conservative gay men believe it's better to "man up" to seem "normal" and stop people from calling them degenerates. Hell, now there's even transphobic gays who want to cut the T off from the acronym because they don't want to be associated with whatever moral panic is going around at the moment
I do hope the Production Design for DWD gets awards recognition. That was the film's greatest asset in my opinion.
When I first saw Stepford Wives 2004, I really loved it. I was also in a relationship with a military man & basically being forced in a similar role lol so I guess it's no wonder I found it funny...haha. Now I'm happily divorced, very queer & unlearning as much as I can of White-Supremacist Capitalist Patriarchy. Looks like I need to watch the 1975 version. Lovely video, thank you for these viewpoints! And also the heads-up on Don't Worry, Darling as I'm very triggered by assault, so looks like another bit of media I will not be partaking in ^.^
Stepford wives also has an assault scene, just a heads up, but you should be able to skip over it.
@@josei1624 it does? The 1975 version??
@@josei1624 Thank you, I very much appreciate this! 🌸
@@shirin9452 Yes, I am not super familiar with the defention of assault, since english isn`t my first language. But during the climax of the movie, the husband fights with the protaganist and it gets briefly physical. very similar to what i saw in don`t worry darling if I remeber correctly
I remember sitting in the cinemas watching don’t worry darling and seeing exactly where it was going, it brought nothing new to the table and all i thought was ‘this is just stepford wives’
really appreciate these great essays on what this movie actually _is_ because literally the only thing I'd heard about it was the behind the scenes drama
I was overworked, overstressed, exhausted
so I created a fake city with hidden undreground sci-fi research facility producing robot copies of people.
When people are exhausted, sometimes they spend a weekend at a national park, sometimes they build theTyrell Corporation. everybody needs a hobby.
Women wouldn't be unhappy working and taking care of the home if men pulled their equal weight in the homes. It's unreasonable to expect someone to be all things while you just get to coast. And sadly, coming from a conservative family (that I fled at 18) I've seen how that just drains women. They're expected to be all things, and he, at most, works 40 hrs at a desk job then lays around at home acting like watching his child while she pees is babysitting he should be paid for.
The sex stuff could have been something interesting too. It could have been framed as sec being used as a tool to control the main character. Showing cracks here and there where we see more abusive elements creeping in. Leading to the grand reveal that it was actually abuse all along. Not just abuse in general but actual rape specifically. It’s something that needs to be addressed. There are coerced into sex, who then only come to terms with it later that they were actually violated. It being their partner doing it doesn’t take away from it being rape. This could have been a very heavy handed metaphor for this in the movie. Since the simulation does make it impossible for her to actually consent, but she only realizes how she’s been violated once she breaks free of it.
He's clearly love bombing and gaslighting her... the film couldn't be any more obvious about that.
Coming back to this essay, because I can't help but think that there could be s perfect sequel to TSW. Like, imagine that it takes place when the kids are older and the daughter has to deal with the horrific discovery that her real mom was replaced by a robot. A rebellious 80's-90's teen trying to be a free spirit, realizing just what a horror show she grew up in.
wow princess, another great video! always appreciate hearing your thoughts. love the shout-outs to jesse and bkr too. i gotta say, after watching this video i am kind of interested in doing my own viewings of the stepford wives adaptations. thank you!!
Such a good reading and explanation! This understanding has been missing from so many other takes on DWD
I actually love the '04 Stepford Wives. Just because it's so rediculous and campy. I never read it as being the women's fault the men feel emasculated but rather that the men were just really pathetic.
Same
I adore all your videos and this was another great one. Thank you so much!
I just saw it for the first time. It’s not a bad movie, not by any stretch of the imagination. But when you break it down, there’s really nothing special about it. This movie is an excellent example of style over substance. You can have the best DP, the best costume designers, and the best actors in the business. But that means nothing if you don’t have a strong story to balance all that out. It felt like Wilde was trying to create her own modernized take on “The Stepford Wives”, but neither her, nor anyone involved stopped to think about what it was that made that movie so great.
I was reminded of Barbarian when you talked bit about elevated horror that ignores foundational aspects of the theme they're getting into. The movie initially seems like it's going to have a lot to say about #MeToo/how men and women react to dangerous situations/etc. But I feel like it amounted to nothing and also didn't really want to say anything about how race impacts that topic.
Yes, this!! Between Barbarian and Men (the movie lol) I’m getting so tired of arthouse horror that thinks it’s saying something brave and bold and necessary about “what it’s like to be a woman” that just comes back to hitting you over the head with simple, tired, not at all nuanced metaphors. Like did the (dude) directors talk to a single woman, let alone anyone actually living in Detroit, before they wrote Barbarian?
This is the third TH-cam video that I’ve watched on DWD. But yours is the first to mention the connection btwn the Stepford Wives. Thank you for that. 1:50
The point you made about why progressive/elevated horror movies often don't work could be a whole video of it's own.
Fantastic video.
Yes! I’d like to hear more about that.
I would watch the hell out of that video!
Willow McClay is a trans film critic who has a lot of writing on this very subject.
I really liked Dont Worry Darling but I think this video really allowed me to understand the criticism around it. Amazing analysis!!
Fantastic video. Having just watched the 70s Stepford Wives for the first time recently it's clear why it still hits so profoundly. I think that a lot of these films trying to be #/feminism are just so edgeless in a way that 70s Stepford isn't. I think the commercialization of feminism removes room for transgression and discussions of intersectionality (ie race and trans issues). Also totally fuck that upcoming Brad Pitt nonsense, shit is part of the problem.
What I like about the 2004 Stepford Wives was that there was a woman at the end of it creating the unrealistic fantasy of Stepford it’s like a discussion about the pick-me.
That comparison to "Yellow Wallpaper" was so very on pointe! Nice one!
BKR is an amazing channel and I'm happy to see her plugged here!
I truly enjoyed this. The gloss of newer movies is no substitute for deeper substance of older films. I saw 1975 SW when I was about 17, and never saw the other 2 films mentioned. I remember a woman telling me back then that men would never want a woman like a Stepford wife. I don't know...
Love your analysis! I haven’t seen any of these movies and the way you make your videos is still so engaging
This was, FABULOUS fun to watch despite the dark subject, so articulate, perfectly done thank you so much!
Loved this analysis. Thanks for your work! I have to revisit the OG Stepford Wives again.
Please do!
It is so telling that the answer society gives to "women are overworked and struggle to have careers and take care of the home and raise children" is "women shouldn't work so they have more energy to take care of the home and raise children."
And not the obvious answer of MEN SHOULD HELP TAKE CARE OF THEIR OWN DAMN HOUSES AND CHILDREN
Yay! I've been waiting for your take
Hope you enjoyed it!
Thing is... I can imagine a Stepford Wives inversion that critiques White Feminism specifically... But the Stepford remake ain't it... Get Out is closer to what that inversion should've been...
Been waiting to see what your take on this would be.
💕 Been so excited for this video!
I'm so glad!
Wow what an amazing video! Thank you so much for making this! While I did enjoy the movie it did fall a little flat for me and you were able to put into words so elegantly what I was feeling. They could have done so much more with this film, it's honestly such a shame... going to watch the og Stepford Wives right now to cleanse my palate. 😘
Love and appreciate your analysis as always, thanks for the video
Remember that this is a movie that feels like a movie.
Loved your analysis! Great as always!
Much appreciated!
the way that you weaved in other media was so well done. i also love your take on the failure of feminism in don’t worry darling.
Very interesting! Great video. I love the 1975 stepford wives and I liked hearing your takes on the film and your comparisons!