*If I am eating my food on a table at a restaurant and right front of me a pretty girl is sitting on another table facing me and she is talking to her girlfriend who is sitting right front her, and the pretty girl who is facing me observes that I am keep giving her romantic look and after few minutes she looked right into my face and gives me a long smile, so what does it mean and what should I do in that type of situation??*
1). Creates excitement and challenge. 2). Sparks curiosity and desire. 3). Exude confidence and independence. 4). differentiation and unpredictability.
Listen, the ease/being comfortable with silence is such a major point. I’ve dated women in the past that just couldn’t do that, and it was exhausting, especially since I was the one doing the majority of the talking. An unfortunate situation really
My last girlfriend would talk non stop because she was uncomfortable with silence. She couldn’t comprehend why silence is healthy no matter how many times I tried to explain. It was a main reason why I ended the relationship.
The second best thing about great relationships are those that have a natural rapport between the two ppl. Convos feel effortless. There's a comfort level where you feel at ease with allowing yourself to BE yourself. You can trust them with your vulnerability. There's nvr awkward silence bc the banter is always flowing. But I do admit that for the first few times I have a girl over, I go out of my way to be a good host. But after that, I love how I don't feel like I have to entertain her. Because there's only thing better than having a girl that you have that natural rapport and effortless convos with. And that's a chick who you can sit in TOTAL SILENCE with! That's when you know it's real. When she can be sitting across the room from me, or even in another room altogether. Reading, watching TV, whatever. But we can be around each other but doing our own thing. The way I explained it to her was, "I usually rather be by myself over having company over or being around anyone else. But there's nobody I rather be alone with than you"
Agree! Have your own interests and hobbies. Have pride in those no matter what anyone thinks. I didn't find out my husband was an amazing violin player until 3 months into dating. He didn't even think to mention it since he's played since he was a kid and it was just a natural part of his life and was deeply personal to him. That just opened up a whole array of questions and curiosities I had about him. When you're truly confident, you don't brag about everything or find ways to bring them up. You just have your own life of things you enjoy and gradually integrate the other person into your life, revealing more over time.
First girl I met after my breakup, I dumped EVERYTHING about my recent relationships and life. My reasoning was in good faith thinking "well she deserves to know what she's getting into". Now I know better, the only version of you that matters is the one in that moment. Don't share things with a girl unless youre explicitly asked.
Ugh. Texting is one of the worst things that ever happened to dating. This is where I tend to lack the most because all subtext is lost. Need work on this. Trying to keep in touch with two girls I met that unfortunately don't live here (this happens a lot) and I wonder about the timing.
*Mysterious men captivate women because they strike the perfect balance between presence and independence. Instead of over-sharing or seeking constant validation, they allow their actions to speak louder than words. This creates intrigue, respect, and excitement.*
Important things: 0:43 First Thing - Creates Excitement And Challenge; 1:10 First Tip for first thing; 2:26 Second Tip for the first thing; 3:00 Third Tip for the first thing; 5:02 Second Thing - Sparks Curiosity & Desire; 5:43 First Tip for second thing; 5:57 Second tip for second thing; 6:19 so true about that (mystery does live room for imagination); 6:35 Third Thing - Exude Confidence & Independence; 8:46 Fourth Thing - Differentiation Or Unpredictability; 10:20 First Tip for fourth thing; 11:30 Second Tip for the fourth thing; and 12:45 To summarize all the told here. Among the all mentioned here, I might add Fifth Thing - Having Charisma (or Being Charismatic) (that can be partly seen in Third Thing as well). Of course I also mean in the healthy way. Why do women like this, all thing? They like because the men take initiative (in healthy way I mean): "He who dares wins (believe it or not)."
I wanted to add one more thing. Women like mystery in a man they're attracted to. If you're unattractive to them, it might help you out like 1% to be mysterious at first. Once she's invested that can increase, but initially she'll rarely believe that an unattractive man has much going on in his life.
Don't show your entire hand to a girl because a woman's imagination will make her fill in the gaps with whatever she wants to believe about you. It also allows her to go searching for answers about who you are, and it will keep her interested in you the more she has to dig for information about who you are as a man.
It reminds me about a month ago that me and couple friends have karaoke championship belts to our name and we met a group of women I their late 30s-early 40s. One of my friends brought a replica belt and she asked if he won that at this bar we go to. Instead of making the answer short and sweet, he goes on and on and she looks at me all baffled, and then I told him she didn't ask to go on a tangent. Point is, don't give more than what you're being asked
Additional female perspective on trauma dumping: I think coming right out with really heavy emotional topics and digging in during the first two dates is a lot. You want to keep the first couple of dates light (if not more) so you can see if you even vibe and get along by just being around each other. I have had some heavy and impactful things happen to me in my life, but not everyone needs to know it, and I don't need to know just anyone's challenges right away. It can feel like you go from a stranger to a therapist really quickly when someone overshares. Once the time is right and you're growing closer, it's not considered oversharing anymore... it's just a natural conversation that is welcomed by both parties. You also want to avoid trauma dumping early on so as to not "trauma bond." The things you have in common shouldn't just be your hurdles in life.
I agree, in most cases. For me specifically, I have a major medical condition that's not readily apparent (I'm the healthiest sick person around, or the sickest healthy person), and it's important that a woman knows about it as it could affect the future of a potential relationship. I'm keeping it fluid, but I've determined that a second date is the proper time to reveal it in most cases. There have been times I've mentioned it on a first date, even before a first date. But it's definitely not fair to the other person to keep it secret for too long.
I understand this but sometimes feeling nervous and insecure when someone approach and I get paralyzed.. trauma affect interaction to other people and kinda scared if they do something what Im not ready to do and how I should tell this... how to communicate and tell this so I wont 1. hurt their feelings or 2. avoid oversharing and like you said treat other person as therapist would need to go far more slower pace then normally people do.. it would be important to tell it since it affect a lot in relationship.. would prefer to say it early on.. couple of times talked to person and the fact person didnt knew about it made so stressed and anxious and were scared too would he judge me it became so overwhelming that couldnt continue getting to know him anymore... he did nothing to me tho, not his fault it`s me.. want to learn how to communicate with people better. This often prevents me to even approach people who I find nice and interesting 😔
This video is really helpful. I would like to add I tip I read in sexologist Shan Boody's book. When on a date always ask two questions for every one question you asked. People love talking about themselves and your saying less and therefore being mysterious!!! Lovely Summer outfit today Courtney 👌
I really appreciate Courtney's moderate and sensible tone. She carries maturity and kindness through her content. However, like a bunch of other romance enthusiasts, I become overwhelmed with their content. Oh it's so simple men- be your best self. At the same time, a video almost everyday on 5 billion variations of how to gain approval from a woman and how your whole brain has to be devoted on how to act. Play games, but don't play games because bad guys do those. Thanks for trying to help.
Yeah i mean she says at the beginning she doesnt like playing games but this whole video kinda seems like a rule book for how to play those games. Im sure she has good intentions but it still seems unnecessarily complicated. But maybe im just too simple for modern women.
Roy Orbison sang it best. "She's a mystery to me" Jimmy Buffett in his book "Where is Joe Merchant?" described it as "The woman I can't explain". Arturo Perez-Reverte in his book the Nautical Chart, the main character saw a beautiful woman on a yacht. And noticed as it sailed away the vessel was called. "Riddle"
Just found you definitely like you and your voice! 💪🏽This is very true I love being mysterious, especially as a business owner. Independent super entrepreneur been single two years now and it’s so great most women I would have to write a book for them to know everything about me. 🙂 every day and every event is an adventure with me. And I see your factor sponsorship. I’m a self-taught chef if 10 years now . I have over 100 pictures of my food. I will dominate any restaurant that’s hands-down. I cook everything I’ll bring something to your table for sure.
Just a quick word. I've heard Courtney say before " your tough but not as tough as the sun ". Well I put this too the test this week, I blagged my way onto a boat in Alicante and went out around the med, it was roasting but I put on factor 50 La Roche possay and meladerm factor 50 on my face and neck and nearly everyone in the evening had the beginnings of sunburn but I was fine, wear your sunblock !!
1. Creates Excitement And A Challenge - Quite honestly I’ve heard this before on other videos but told in a very different way where if you’re man you have to have some mystery and in doing so it’ll attract women to like the man for different reasons x, y, & z. So it makes sense for men to hide a little bit of themselves but then reveal themselves to be an exciting person to be around and is the leader and takes new opportunities and challenges to better himself in ways he hasn’t yet most men think they know everything but that’s not true there is always something new to learn that can be challenging, even if’s it work related or relationship oriented so it depends, or even friendships too. 2. Sparks Curiosity & Desires - Like the desires part is understandable like I get that I do but there’s not too much I know about it I mean if could mean so many it could be about men that are confident, yet are interested, but intriguing, and are very good looking and to see if there’s a connection between the man and woman so it does make sense when you think to yourself when it comes down to sparks, curiosity, and desires because the curiosity part is fine but best not to overdo it with questions after questions or else the woman will feel so burnt out she won’t know what to do at the date, and an all that probably pay for her own way and leave the date. 3. Exude & Independence - So Exude is about finding out about what can happen if the person leaves mystery more than showing their personality but it it sense more mystery without having to display it without not make it to hard either. And Independence can help us in ways where women will find it very easy for women to think wow he knows how to take care of himself and really knows how balance his work life, social life, family life, and balancing life and doing things that way. And have Confidence for themselves. But as for me though balance is a tough thing to do because I try to stay in touch with friends and close friends and best friends and girlfriend and family and work related stuff where I take more time in my work related careers more because more of the social aspects just aren’t always there sometimes but not always do that’s why I have figure out what I need to do and I can be selective with friends I have gotten rid of 13 - 14 old friends that where not needed in my life all of them as I have discovered that they we’re not benefiting for me and for my morals in life they’re morals where just lame and desperate and very clingy and very selfish and very assholish people and we’re just very not great guys all them were just bs’ers and pervs, and just none of them had confidence and treated others like crap and I hated that and an all that and that’s I why I cut them off. 4. Then Lastly Unpredictability - Oh meaning by our actions and feelings and emotions without then getting the best of us well that can be hard one sometimes as I man I will make small mistakes and then I will admit to them and apologize and say I was wrong because we can’t always be right.
Somebody who had known me for a reasonable amount of time once confessed to me that they had concluded that I was a spy because I didn't reveal everything about myself and because my life is not easy to categorise. I am not a spy but my work colleagues still don't really know much about me and what they think they know is what they have constructed for themselves from things I chosen to reveal. I don't have and have never had any social media accounts which is also unusual. It is easy to be a mystery.
I like the slow and steady relationship. I am demonstrating it now with a new lady friend. She is a businesswoman so my time and attention is on my life🥂
I love your channel. Things that bother me about modern dating or women's expectations are that the woman always has to be entertained or even expect something exciting to happen. This video of yours you just released is for men trying to catch and keep a woman, or how to make themselves more' likable.' I tried dating apps but deleted them after one month... It feels like the women today never matured past their teen expectations... Same with immature guys that still play video games. I love your channel, Courtney, you offer the best advice and are unbiased.
An engagement failed with a debutant and her family when I expressed my true philosophy (Puritan work ethic) to her dad, an attorney, after he told me he made a full day fee in just a 1/2 hour phone call. He said he charged the full estimated hours--- even though, it took much less. He said that the client would not know the difference. 😁 Later in life, I had to pay a day's fees upfront with an attorney. I sense he already had the answer and did not spend all day for his $4000 fee. 🤔 An honest man requires an honest woman from an honest family; otherwise, when they cannot control you, it becomes problematic for the class they have obtained. Business is business--- even the love business. 💗
Just treat her like she treats you. If she tests you test her. If it’s meant to be is meant to be. There’s always another. You’re strong and smart. You’re bold and you love yourself. You give but you got to get too. Or it won’t work out. You don’t appreciate selfishness. And change plans last minute, it sure gets more fun.
Has Courtney ever done videos on “highly sensitive people” and dating? I recently read the book Highly Sensitive Person and realized that I am one as a man, which means that I am easily overstimulated by senses, new experiences and emotions, and I find myself avoiding overexciting things like clubs in favor of “boring” things like walks, small group conversations, and reading. I also have always been very in touch with emotions as a man and am very aware of others’ emotions due to my sensitivity. In popular culture this is definitely seen by women as unattractive because it’s ‘boring’ and we don’t associate being emotional with being male. I find myself having to hide that side of myself (which, incidentally, as many men as women are highly sensitive) in order to have dating success, because women love an adventurous, exciting guy, and that’s basically the textbook opposite of what highly sensitive people prefer to do.
These reasons can definitely be achieved in a *healthy* way! Great advice on helping keep the spark alive! Not being too predictable and doing random acts of kind gestures once in a while, like sending flowers to work or writing a short appreciation letter or cooking your partners favorite meal to come home to, can really turn someone's day around! And I wouldn't say being mysterious is manipulative like I've seen in the comments, I'd say it's more of constructive thinking on how to savor the relationship. Is it wrong or selfish to want to savor, or is it thoughtful? Fast💨 or 🐌 ?
I just wish I could find a woman that lives close to me. most live more than 100 miles away or another state. The ones that do live close by end up being gold diggers and keep asking me for money and to send them money for everything from gas for their cars, to BD gift for their kids, to asking me for $1100 for a new cell phone because hers is getting old and she wants to buy a newer model. LOL. Mine is more than 6 yrs. old and has the original battery still in it. (Samsung S-8). The newest model out is a S-23, so you see I don't believe in buying the newest model just because it's out on the market. I have tried to be "Mysterious" but I am a blabber mouth. Especially when they ask me about myself. Love your channel. Keep it up.
Yes, Courtney, in any evolving relationship, honesty is the greatest mystery of all , You are a good woman ,and anytime i read your advice it leaves room for a small bit of mystery.. I am presently glued to those American presidential,debates , and won't be reading all your dissertations. God Bless.. Irish Tony.
I was talking with a woman last night, and she told me "I feel like I don't know anything about you." I asked her a few questions about things about me, and she couldn't give any answer for them, but I was able to answer said questions about her. She blushed the entire time.
Wait, it doesn't have to be manipulative? 😂 I very much agree with the first point, and I'm pacing myself with this girl I've been talking to. We've already seen each other a couple times, and we're on am equal playing field with taking our time. It's easier when you respond to the last thing she said.
Not at all, actually. The "Mystery" actually means not divulging everything about yourself early on. It's a good thing to do to protect your heart, too! The reason you want to keep things to be desired and learned is because there is such a thing as too much, too soon. As humans we need time to process and grow together, not just go from 0 to 100 in 2 dates. It's healthy to let things go at a slower pace.
So let me get this straight, in order to appeal to a female, I have to be a high-value man, a bad boy, and now mysterious? Sounds like jumping through a lot of hoops just to find a partner. What hoops do females have to jump through in order to get one of us guys? Or are they exempt from that?
Exactly. Women dont love you. They care about the entertainment value and how they feel reacting to you. its your job to provide and protect and do everything while entertaining a grown child that feels entitled to everything you do all the time.
I don't think you have to do all of these things, just that some/most women are attracted to that. If you fit some of the boxes you'll be fine. If women are as picky as you think why aren't they all single?
You are not wrong. At least, not wrong if you listen to these videos long enough and live in the modern world as a young man. Honestly, I am age 60 and men didn't have to be performing seals, psychologists, semi pro athletes and higher income tax bracket earners back in my dating days in the 1980s. You didn't have to pay for her dinner either. Find a nice girl, behave like a decent human being, have fun, talk sincerely about what you wanted out of life, agree on what is important, don't sweat the small stuff, get married. It's how it used to be.
As the old saying : "The truth is, usually, somewhere in the middle." I agree with you, Courtney, that playing mind games to manipulate... its quite low, childish and an all around a giant neon lit red flag, both in women and men. Now... relating to woman behaivor, having step by step new things to discover in the man they are in a relation with, will keep them insterested, while exploring the interest, habits, boundaries and character of said man. Think in a playfull curious cat. 😁
"A DEGREE OF MYSTERY IS VERY ATTRACTIVE TO FEMALES. INSTEAD OF TELLING HER MY JOB IS RUNNING MULTIPLE CASINOS I TELL HER MY JOB IS I TAKE CARE OF MY PEOPLE. THIS IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE THE STORY SHE IS GOING TO CONSTRUCT IN HER MIND IS FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN THE TRUTH THUS MAINTAINING ATTRACTION LIKE A BIG G" - COBRA T8
Mystery works if the man is physically attractive for the woman. If he's not then the mystery is translated to her worst fears for her physical security
This is how I know your advice is useful. I once was the opposite of all of the good tips you just gave us. I had zero mystery. I was an open book of T.M.I. I'm reformed now. For me it was just misplaced creative energy. I'm a writer so I needed a place to transfer that phethora of information. The fact that women didn't have to ask me questions was a problem. I have balance now. This is such an important video. Thank you Courtney. If you ever narrate your audiobook i'm buying it. You have a relaxing voice. P.o.p.
Good video about not over-sharing. I would add that when women claim a guy is "mysterious," he really isn't mysterious... not in the least. I think women use that word to heighten the soap opera drama in their otherwise boring and mundane lives.
A guy who's not interesting? Learn things: Read a book and look up various topics and ideas. Study up on popculture. Having some sort of knowledge in various areas will give you wit and allow you to respond or introduce topics readily when you need it.
I think there's a fine line between leaving certain details to the imagination and having that sense of allure, but you also don't want to find out that the man you've been dating for the past 5 years has a criminal history with homicide or takes a secret liking to being pegged.
i mean if the guy likes to get pegged(sexual fantasy) that shouldnt be something you should judge them over. If you have any fantasies or preferences yourself it would be good to both be vulnerable about what you would want. Thats just my opinion though
Think about it, especially when texting, is it really necessary to spend all that time going through every last little bit instead of saving something for next time? Or getting the topic on to something more fun like the sheets. Besides, it is definitely much more fun to let stuff like that be revealed naturally over time because the more you surprise her the more she will be impressed which means she will have a stronger desire so it is better to leave things up to the imagination unless otherwise necessary in that moment
I really wish women could understand the process of going on a date from a male perspective. There no cookie cutter way for a man to be and if this is out of your character you'll never get a woman you're actually compatible with. Be yourself and if they dont like it fuck em
I like predictability when it comes to intimacy. It makes life easier.😊If all women are like Courtney (AWALT) then I'm going my own way to maintain near perfect mystery 😊
Mysterious...I'm only 95% sure my neighbor is a secret killer. Owns a big house, no wife or "friends." No pets. Where does he go at 2 am every night on his motorcycle? Very mysterious...
Why is mysterious a prefix noun suffix and the Scooby's do adjective is you can grab sterio slighty and mystery slighty though you CAN not grab US slighty. Its really a very oxymoron of a word one word with such so much extra definitions and hidden meanings, good topic!
I never asked a woman for her name and neither I tell her my name first and foremost especially as far as public relations. If chase them like that that spells you need her more than she needs you
Extroverted guys need to be particularly careful here. Because we gain energy from being around others and love talking, we can wind up talking too much and oversharing. I only realized this recently and have taken some mitigating steps. Like I can tell a girl I just met A LITTLE about my love for Homeric poetry and how it inspired my own stores. I don't need to tell her about my my goal to travel to all the obscure places that supposedly sent ships to Troy just yet (unless she's really, really into it). Now, I'm the type that can kind of get away with this because of my enthusiasm (and because I'm decently handsome). But I realized it was too much. Extroverts have a lot of advantages but need to be careful and not become windbags. This is where more introverted guys can actually have an advantage.
I like your advice. It's very real and not kind of ''do good'r'' advice with bit's of bulls**t sprinkled in there. :) it's all very accurate and balanced. Nice! love from UK
Being mysterious is easy. Ask your date a question, then watch her talk about herself for 90 straight minutes. I am perfect mystery, in that they know nothing about me.
Being mysterious builds attraction and should only be in the beginning. It should also be natural and not forced. Theres no need to be mysterious once both parties are dating and getting to know each other. Im not saying tell EVERYTHING but you shouldn't be mysterious all day everyday that makes no sense. Open up to the right person gradually and be transparent. Be yourself, dont TRY to be mysterious.
it could be if a guy is just afraid of a forever type of love or conflicted with his own stuff and thinking it's better she don't have to go through your journey dealing with your baggage. i don't know for my own self if i really don't want forever love, but i would rather face my demons alone. i'd spare her the bumpy ride because it wouldn't be fair to her for me to have her go through that with a messed up guy like me.
You can talk very beautifully Courtney 👌 so natural and so from the heart 👌 Great and we are really on the same page because you are very concerned with the feeling you get or that you give to people and those are the people who other people can tune nicely because you have a perfect feeling for it and you can convey and translate it perfectly to the man 😉🙏👌Greetings from the Netherlands 🧡🧡
Men have the advantage, with their biological clock, women do not have that advantage despite the spin we hear in the media, 1% of the women who are over 50, are able to have babies, this is a fact. I have 3 beautiful children, so what do I need a woman for, only childless men simp for women. My children bring me joy, and if a woman is there it is an added bonus. We men should appreciate the many Aces we have, we are at an advantage don't take less than your value. Remember a single parent is a No No, unless she is paying the complete bills in the house, because you are providing emotional support. Gone are the days when men will be the downtrodden sex. There is now the Global Dating Scene. Courtney thanks for your advice anyway. 🎉
once you know each other's geography completely, serious relationship becomes ugly, because you are going to do and experience the same thing again and again, first it was an unknown territory for both to be discovered, after knowing each other completely, there is nothing to be discovered any more, and to go on doing and experiencing the same things routinely is mechanically ugly.
They don't like mysterious men, they like mysteriousness because uncertainty is what drives passion to discover which is a huge part of the desire for 'mate' (which in the human dynamic complexity is more than just a mate, but a partner, lover, companion, friend), but it's not the only part of the dynamic that should be valued and it needs to be with the awareness of its purpose/function in a HIGHER desire for the good thing that is bonding and family and community that is essential to human-connectedness and what is essential to establish/cultivate in a healthy relationship.
a better idea is to live toward freedom, for in freedom is uncertainty and the truth passion for life and experience of the unknown, together with a good partner, is the most exhilerating, fulfilling, meaningful experience to have/share with another
Most women I've known in my life, know nothing about me. I baffle them because I never discuss my personal, or love life (which I don't have). And they never really ask. I talk about work, the weather, sport, religion or politics.......but never myself. They've never asked, so I've assumed they never wanted to know.
I don't talk much because I suck at talking to women.....so I don't.... they aren't interested if you have to chase them, so I don't......if they are, they will come around you.....and if nobody says anything to me, I don't interject my opinion.....I just listen to them
The problem with being attracted to a mysterious man is that the closer you get to him, the less mysterious he becomes. If this is the basis of the woman's attraction, it will fade quickly and Mystery Man will be thrown in the dumpster with the rest of them.
Overall, it creates excitement on her mind and she'll linger to that feeling. I have been on this rodeo for so many years, I know it all but I'm exhausted with the current dating scene nowadays, I don't actively pursue anymore
As an older guy, i had to learn that less is more with women, less talking and less revelling too much, on the part of the guy, which creates mystery. Its hard to do when you're face to face with a girl but its a game changer. The less you say the less change of saying the wrong thing.
I think the real message here would be for men to slow down and listen. Not only will the person you’re courting see that you’re a good listener, but you can vet appropriately. I don’t think actively withholding information is the right approach though. The whole “Being Mysterious” approach in hopes to”woo” a woman promotes bad/insecure behaviors. Secure women can pick that up in a heartbeat. They might like it for a while, then they’ll see you’re either avoidant or playing silly games.
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*If I am eating my food on a table at a restaurant and right front of me a pretty girl is sitting on another table facing me and she is talking to her girlfriend who is sitting right front her, and the pretty girl who is facing me observes that I am keep giving her romantic look and after few minutes she looked right into my face and gives me a long smile, so what does it mean and what should I do in that type of situation??*
I don’t know how you can push that plasticised looking stuff. C’mon Courtney, I bet you’d never eat it.
BS I'm mysterious,
1). Creates excitement and challenge.
2). Sparks curiosity and desire.
3). Exude confidence and independence.
4). differentiation and unpredictability.
Hopefully if you haven't, do a video on how to attract women without compromising yourself. Thanks
In other words, be perfect.
@@JohnM... the Bible says we "all for short of the glory of God" ROM 3:23
@@JohnM...coming from the mouth of a loser. Don’t worry though I’ll make sure to pull out of your future wife. So, you don’t have to raise my son.
'I won't lie to you, ...cards are not my bag, baby.'- Austin Powers
Listen, the ease/being comfortable with silence is such a major point. I’ve dated women in the past that just couldn’t do that, and it was exhausting, especially since I was the one doing the majority of the talking. An unfortunate situation really
I hate being the only one who does the talking. I always want to say, "It's okay to ask me something, you know."
My last girlfriend would talk non stop because she was uncomfortable with silence. She couldn’t comprehend why silence is healthy no matter how many times I tried to explain. It was a main reason why I ended the relationship.
@@matth5309 honestly, very legit reason. Can’t lie
The second best thing about great relationships are those that have a natural rapport between the two ppl. Convos feel effortless. There's a comfort level where you feel at ease with allowing yourself to BE yourself. You can trust them with your vulnerability. There's nvr awkward silence bc the banter is always flowing. But I do admit that for the first few times I have a girl over, I go out of my way to be a good host. But after that, I love how I don't feel like I have to entertain her. Because there's only thing better than having a girl that you have that natural rapport and effortless convos with. And that's a chick who you can sit in TOTAL SILENCE with! That's when you know it's real. When she can be sitting across the room from me, or even in another room altogether. Reading, watching TV, whatever. But we can be around each other but doing our own thing. The way I explained it to her was, "I usually rather be by myself over having company over or being around anyone else. But there's nobody I rather be alone with than you"
@@PoeTréAloisio all of this. 100%
Nothing more to add to that because that’s exactly how I feel. Hit the nail right on the head 👌🏾
that moment when you’re naturally mysterious because you’re actually just shy
Working on yourself is attractive! People are more confident in you if you are confident in yourself!
So true!
Agree! Have your own interests and hobbies. Have pride in those no matter what anyone thinks. I didn't find out my husband was an amazing violin player until 3 months into dating. He didn't even think to mention it since he's played since he was a kid and it was just a natural part of his life and was deeply personal to him. That just opened up a whole array of questions and curiosities I had about him. When you're truly confident, you don't brag about everything or find ways to bring them up. You just have your own life of things you enjoy and gradually integrate the other person into your life, revealing more over time.
Nice video as always Courtney. As with most things, not being extreme and finding a good balance is usually the best path.
Absolutely! Thanks for being here 🙂
First girl I met after my breakup, I dumped EVERYTHING about my recent relationships and life. My reasoning was in good faith thinking "well she deserves to know what she's getting into".
Now I know better, the only version of you that matters is the one in that moment. Don't share things with a girl unless youre explicitly asked.
One way to be mysterious is to not give out all your cards in the beginning and don't text her everyday!
Ugh. Texting is one of the worst things that ever happened to dating. This is where I tend to lack the most because all subtext is lost. Need work on this. Trying to keep in touch with two girls I met that unfortunately don't live here (this happens a lot) and I wonder about the timing.
I'd say it's good not to initiate texting every day but if she initiates it's fine to reply. If you are always the initiator that is a red flag anyway
*Mysterious men captivate women because they strike the perfect balance between presence and independence. Instead of over-sharing or seeking constant validation, they allow their actions to speak louder than words. This creates intrigue, respect, and excitement.*
Important things: 0:43 First Thing - Creates Excitement And Challenge; 1:10 First Tip for first thing; 2:26 Second Tip for the first thing; 3:00 Third Tip for the first thing; 5:02 Second Thing - Sparks Curiosity & Desire; 5:43 First Tip for second thing; 5:57 Second tip for second thing; 6:19 so true about that (mystery does live room for imagination); 6:35 Third Thing - Exude Confidence & Independence; 8:46 Fourth Thing - Differentiation Or Unpredictability; 10:20 First Tip for fourth thing; 11:30 Second Tip for the fourth thing; and 12:45 To summarize all the told here.
Among the all mentioned here, I might add Fifth Thing - Having Charisma (or Being Charismatic) (that can be partly seen in Third Thing as well). Of course I also mean in the healthy way.
Why do women like this, all thing? They like because the men take initiative (in healthy way I mean): "He who dares wins (believe it or not)."
Wow....simp.
Men learn to be happy on your own. A woman just compliments your life but its shouldn't be your priority
Being honest and having the ability to find common ground is a great way to show anyone that you care about them
Courtney your outfits are always so adorable! You have such great taste in your style, and it radiates the kindness of your heart! 😊💚
Courtney: In other words (to quote Shakespeare), you should strive to “Have more than thou showest, speak less than thou knowest.”
I wanted to add one more thing. Women like mystery in a man they're attracted to. If you're unattractive to them, it might help you out like 1% to be mysterious at first. Once she's invested that can increase, but initially she'll rarely believe that an unattractive man has much going on in his life.
Don't show your entire hand to a girl because a woman's imagination will make her fill in the gaps with whatever she wants to believe about you. It also allows her to go searching for answers about who you are, and it will keep her interested in you the more she has to dig for information about who you are as a man.
Hi AJ!
It reminds me about a month ago that me and couple friends have karaoke championship belts to our name and we met a group of women I their late 30s-early 40s. One of my friends brought a replica belt and she asked if he won that at this bar we go to. Instead of making the answer short and sweet, he goes on and on and she looks at me all baffled, and then I told him she didn't ask to go on a tangent.
Point is, don't give more than what you're being asked
Great comment. Allowing her to wonder about a guy will always make her desire him
@@jomorrow1till she gets bored
Additional female perspective on trauma dumping:
I think coming right out with really heavy emotional topics and digging in during the first two dates is a lot. You want to keep the first couple of dates light (if not more) so you can see if you even vibe and get along by just being around each other. I have had some heavy and impactful things happen to me in my life, but not everyone needs to know it, and I don't need to know just anyone's challenges right away. It can feel like you go from a stranger to a therapist really quickly when someone overshares. Once the time is right and you're growing closer, it's not considered oversharing anymore... it's just a natural conversation that is welcomed by both parties.
You also want to avoid trauma dumping early on so as to not "trauma bond." The things you have in common shouldn't just be your hurdles in life.
For reasons that I won’t go into here, it’s often a sign of addiction or early addictive behavior. Look into John Bradshaw’s work.
I agree, in most cases. For me specifically, I have a major medical condition that's not readily apparent (I'm the healthiest sick person around, or the sickest healthy person), and it's important that a woman knows about it as it could affect the future of a potential relationship. I'm keeping it fluid, but I've determined that a second date is the proper time to reveal it in most cases. There have been times I've mentioned it on a first date, even before a first date. But it's definitely not fair to the other person to keep it secret for too long.
@@davidabarakYes me too, exactly
Agree on the trauma bonding. Made that mistake 10 years ago when I dated someone I met at a suicide survivor support group. Won't do that again.
I understand this but sometimes feeling nervous and insecure when someone approach and I get paralyzed.. trauma affect interaction to other people and kinda scared if they do something what Im not ready to do and how I should tell this... how to communicate and tell this so I wont
1. hurt their feelings or
2. avoid oversharing and like you said treat other person as therapist
would need to go far more slower pace then normally people do..
it would be important to tell it since it affect a lot in relationship.. would prefer to say it early on..
couple of times talked to person and the fact person didnt knew about it made so stressed and anxious and were scared too would he judge me it became so overwhelming that couldnt continue getting to know him anymore... he did nothing to me tho, not his fault it`s me.. want to learn how to communicate with people better. This often prevents me to even approach people who I find nice and interesting 😔
This video is really helpful. I would like to add I tip I read in sexologist Shan Boody's book. When on a date always ask two questions for every one question you asked. People love talking about themselves and your saying less and therefore being mysterious!!! Lovely Summer outfit today Courtney 👌
Attractive = Mysterious
Unattractive = Creepy
I wish Courtney would have clarified that a bit more.
I really appreciate Courtney's moderate and sensible tone. She carries maturity and kindness through her content.
However, like a bunch of other romance enthusiasts, I become overwhelmed with their content.
Oh it's so simple men- be your best self.
At the same time, a video almost everyday on 5 billion variations of how to gain approval from a woman and how your whole brain has to be devoted on how to act. Play games, but don't play games because bad guys do those.
Thanks for trying to help.
Yeah i mean she says at the beginning she doesnt like playing games but this whole video kinda seems like a rule book for how to play those games. Im sure she has good intentions but it still seems unnecessarily complicated. But maybe im just too simple for modern women.
@@alexmugseeseems complicated at first blush but if you take to heart that it's about moving slowly when getting to know someone it's not.
Roy Orbison sang it best. "She's a mystery to me" Jimmy Buffett in his book "Where is Joe Merchant?" described it as "The woman I can't explain". Arturo Perez-Reverte in his book the Nautical Chart, the main character saw a beautiful woman on a yacht. And noticed as it sailed away the vessel was called. "Riddle"
Just found you definitely like you and your voice! 💪🏽This is very true I love being mysterious, especially as a business owner. Independent super entrepreneur been single two years now and it’s so great most women I would have to write a book for them to know everything about me. 🙂 every day and every event is an adventure with me. And I see your factor sponsorship. I’m a self-taught chef if 10 years now . I have over 100 pictures of my food. I will dominate any restaurant that’s hands-down. I cook everything I’ll bring something to your table for sure.
Just a quick word. I've heard Courtney say before " your tough but not as tough as the sun ". Well I put this too the test this week, I blagged my way onto a boat in Alicante and went out around the med, it was roasting but I put on factor 50 La Roche possay and meladerm factor 50 on my face and neck and nearly everyone in the evening had the beginnings of sunburn but I was fine, wear your sunblock !!
1. Creates Excitement And A Challenge -
Quite honestly I’ve heard this before on other videos but told in a very different way where if you’re man you have to have some mystery and in doing so it’ll attract women to like the man for different reasons x, y, & z.
So it makes sense for men to hide a little bit of themselves but then reveal themselves to be an exciting person to be around and is the leader and takes new opportunities and challenges to better himself in ways he hasn’t yet most men think they know everything but that’s not true there is always something new to learn that can be challenging, even if’s it work related or relationship oriented so it depends, or even friendships too.
2. Sparks Curiosity & Desires -
Like the desires part is understandable like I get that I do but there’s not too much I know about it I mean if could mean so many it could be about men that are confident, yet are interested, but intriguing, and are very good looking and to see if there’s a connection between the man and woman so it does make sense when you think to yourself when it comes down to sparks, curiosity, and desires because the curiosity part is fine but best not to overdo it with questions after questions or else the woman will feel so burnt out she won’t know what to do at the date, and an all that probably pay for her own way and leave the date.
3. Exude & Independence -
So Exude is about finding out about what can happen if the person leaves mystery more than showing their personality but it it sense more mystery without having to display it without not make it to hard either. And Independence can help us in ways where women will find it very easy for women to think wow he knows how to take care of himself and really knows how balance his work life, social life, family life, and balancing life and doing things that way. And have Confidence for themselves. But as for me though balance is a tough thing to do because I try to stay in touch with friends and close friends and best friends and girlfriend and family and work related stuff where I take more time in my work related careers more because more of the social aspects just aren’t always there sometimes but not always do that’s why I have figure out what I need to do and I can be selective with friends I have gotten rid of 13 - 14 old friends that where not needed in my life all of them as I have discovered that they we’re not benefiting for me and for my morals in life they’re morals where just lame and desperate and very clingy and very selfish and very assholish people and we’re just very not great guys all them were just bs’ers and pervs, and just none of them had confidence and treated others like crap and I hated that and an all that and that’s I why I cut them off.
4. Then Lastly Unpredictability -
Oh meaning by our actions and feelings and emotions without then getting the best of us well that can be hard one sometimes as I man I will make small mistakes and then I will admit to them and apologize and say I was wrong because we can’t always be right.
Today the mystery of being more mysterious has been solved! Happy Friday, Courtney and Fellow Viewers!
😂❤️ you too my friend!
Somebody who had known me for a reasonable amount of time once confessed to me that they had concluded that I was a spy because I didn't reveal everything about myself and because my life is not easy to categorise. I am not a spy but my work colleagues still don't really know much about me and what they think they know is what they have constructed for themselves from things I chosen to reveal. I don't have and have never had any social media accounts which is also unusual. It is easy to be a mystery.
I like the slow and steady relationship. I am demonstrating it now with a new lady friend. She is a businesswoman so my time and attention is on my life🥂
I love your channel.
Things that bother me about modern dating or women's expectations are that the woman always has to be entertained or even expect something exciting to happen. This video of yours you just released is for men trying to catch and keep a woman, or how to make themselves more' likable.' I tried dating apps but deleted them after one month... It feels like the women today never matured past their teen expectations... Same with immature guys that still play video games. I love your channel, Courtney, you offer the best advice and are unbiased.
Immaturity and video games are two different things. There is nothing wrong with playing video games 😉
Im glad you debunked that myth regarding answering questions! That haunted me for months.
Ms. Ryan, you are insightful. I had never thought about this in a direct sense. Thank you for sharing.
An engagement failed with a debutant and her family when I expressed my true philosophy (Puritan work ethic) to her dad, an attorney, after he told me he made a full day fee in just a 1/2 hour phone call. He said he charged the full estimated hours--- even though, it took much less. He said that the client would not know the difference. 😁
Later in life, I had to pay a day's fees upfront with an attorney. I sense he already had the answer and did not spend all day for his $4000 fee. 🤔
An honest man requires an honest woman from an honest family; otherwise, when they cannot control you, it becomes problematic for the class they have obtained.
Business is business--- even the love business. 💗
Just treat her like she treats you. If she tests you test her. If it’s meant to be is meant to be. There’s always another. You’re strong and smart. You’re bold and you love yourself. You give but you got to get too. Or it won’t work out. You don’t appreciate selfishness. And change plans last minute, it sure gets more fun.
I have always been super shy taking your advise us helping me break out of my shell .thank you for helping guys like me .guys she is the real deal.
I’m so glad to hear it. Wishing you the best!
@@CourtneyRyan thank you very much
@@chrisd6053check out iron in the soul
Thanks!
Thank you!! 🥰
Has Courtney ever done videos on “highly sensitive people” and dating? I recently read the book Highly Sensitive Person and realized that I am one as a man, which means that I am easily overstimulated by senses, new experiences and emotions, and I find myself avoiding overexciting things like clubs in favor of “boring” things like walks, small group conversations, and reading. I also have always been very in touch with emotions as a man and am very aware of others’ emotions due to my sensitivity. In popular culture this is definitely seen by women as unattractive because it’s ‘boring’ and we don’t associate being emotional with being male. I find myself having to hide that side of myself (which, incidentally, as many men as women are highly sensitive) in order to have dating success, because women love an adventurous, exciting guy, and that’s basically the textbook opposite of what highly sensitive people prefer to do.
These reasons can definitely be achieved in a *healthy* way! Great advice on helping keep the spark alive! Not being too predictable and doing random acts of kind gestures once in a while, like sending flowers to work or writing a short appreciation letter or cooking your partners favorite meal to come home to, can really turn someone's day around! And I wouldn't say being mysterious is manipulative like I've seen in the comments, I'd say it's more of constructive thinking on how to savor the relationship. Is it wrong or selfish to want to savor, or is it thoughtful? Fast💨 or 🐌 ?
I don't worry about how to appeal to a woman. She needs to learn how to appeal to me.
It's not about her
Wonderful topic to cover Courtney. Thank you!
Y’all killed LSU last week.
We sho did!! @@pharmcat8484
Nice dress ❤
Yea, mysterious along with good clear communication 😅
And of course as Courtney my friend says, respect 😊
Happy Friday. 🎉
Hope you have a nice weekend!
I just wish I could find a woman that lives close to me. most live more than 100 miles away or another state. The ones that do live close by end up being gold diggers and keep asking me for money and to send them money for everything from gas for their cars, to BD gift for their kids, to asking me for $1100 for a new cell phone because hers is getting old and she wants to buy a newer model. LOL. Mine is more than 6 yrs. old and has the original battery still in it. (Samsung S-8). The newest model out is a S-23, so you see I don't believe in buying the newest model just because it's out on the market. I have tried to be "Mysterious" but I am a blabber mouth. Especially when they ask me about myself. Love your channel. Keep it up.
Yes, Courtney, in any evolving relationship, honesty is the greatest mystery of all , You are a good woman ,and anytime i read your advice it leaves room for a small bit of mystery.. I am presently glued to those American presidential,debates , and won't be reading all your dissertations. God Bless.. Irish Tony.
I was talking with a woman last night, and she told me "I feel like I don't know anything about you." I asked her a few questions about things about me, and she couldn't give any answer for them, but I was able to answer said questions about her. She blushed the entire time.
Hello Courtney! Girl here👋🏼 Totally unrelated, but where do you usually shop for clothes? I love your elegant style. Thanks!✌🏼✌🏼
Wait, it doesn't have to be manipulative? 😂
I very much agree with the first point, and I'm pacing myself with this girl I've been talking to. We've already seen each other a couple times, and we're on am equal playing field with taking our time. It's easier when you respond to the last thing she said.
Love it! Keep us updated!
@@CourtneyRyanI certainly will!!
@@CourtneyRyando you always sit on the fence?🙄🤮
Ladies, I eat my Cheerios with ketchup rather than milk. Very mysterious......
Answer: Because everything has to be a game and there's more of a game involved with "mystery."
Not at all, actually. The "Mystery" actually means not divulging everything about yourself early on. It's a good thing to do to protect your heart, too! The reason you want to keep things to be desired and learned is because there is such a thing as too much, too soon. As humans we need time to process and grow together, not just go from 0 to 100 in 2 dates. It's healthy to let things go at a slower pace.
@@poeticeclipse 🤦♂
So let me get this straight, in order to appeal to a female, I have to be a high-value man, a bad boy, and now mysterious? Sounds like jumping through a lot of hoops just to find a partner. What hoops do females have to jump through in order to get one of us guys? Or are they exempt from that?
Exactly. Women dont love you. They care about the entertainment value and how they feel reacting to you. its your job to provide and protect and do everything while entertaining a grown child that feels entitled to everything you do all the time.
Agree… This channel just verifies and enables female entitlement
I don't think you have to do all of these things, just that some/most women are attracted to that. If you fit some of the boxes you'll be fine. If women are as picky as you think why aren't they all single?
@@bittenhare4493 LOL no
You are not wrong. At least, not wrong if you listen to these videos long enough and live in the modern world as a young man. Honestly, I am age 60 and men didn't have to be performing seals, psychologists, semi pro athletes and higher income tax bracket earners back in my dating days in the 1980s. You didn't have to pay for her dinner either.
Find a nice girl, behave like a decent human being, have fun, talk sincerely about what you wanted out of life, agree on what is important, don't sweat the small stuff, get married. It's how it used to be.
As the old saying : "The truth is, usually, somewhere in the middle."
I agree with you, Courtney, that playing mind games to manipulate... its quite low, childish and an all around a giant neon lit red flag, both in women and men.
Now... relating to woman behaivor, having step by step new things to discover in the man they are in a relation with, will keep them insterested, while exploring the interest, habits, boundaries and character of said man. Think in a playfull curious cat. 😁
"A DEGREE OF MYSTERY IS VERY ATTRACTIVE TO FEMALES. INSTEAD OF TELLING HER MY JOB IS RUNNING MULTIPLE CASINOS I TELL HER MY JOB IS I TAKE CARE OF MY PEOPLE. THIS IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE THE STORY SHE IS GOING TO CONSTRUCT IN HER MIND IS FAR MORE INTERESTING THAN THE TRUTH THUS MAINTAINING ATTRACTION LIKE A BIG G" - COBRA T8
That's why it's important to be multifaceted... there's more to share, therefore always exciting
Mystery works if the man is physically attractive for the woman. If he's not then the mystery is translated to her worst fears for her physical security
Mysterious or Weirdo… Based on appearance
Love the outfit Courtney gives you a cute country girl look
Great Video thank you for the great input to things!
My pleasure!
This is how I know your advice is useful. I once was the opposite of all of the good tips you just gave us. I had zero mystery. I was an open book of T.M.I. I'm reformed now.
For me it was just misplaced creative energy. I'm a writer so I needed a place to transfer that phethora of information. The fact that women didn't have to ask me questions was a problem. I have balance now. This is such an important video. Thank you Courtney. If you ever narrate your audiobook i'm buying it. You have a relaxing voice.
P.o.p.
Good video about not over-sharing. I would add that when women claim a guy is "mysterious," he really isn't mysterious... not in the least. I think women use that word to heighten the soap opera drama in their otherwise boring and mundane lives.
It would be great if you can make a video on, "How to be Unpredictable to Women" video, and "How to Be More Interesting".🇵🇭
Of you're not interesting, you're just not.
A guy who's not interesting? Learn things: Read a book and look up various topics and ideas. Study up on popculture. Having some sort of knowledge in various areas will give you wit and allow you to respond or introduce topics readily when you need it.
I think there's a fine line between leaving certain details to the imagination and having that sense of allure, but you also don't want to find out that the man you've been dating for the past 5 years has a criminal history with homicide or takes a secret liking to being pegged.
i mean if the guy likes to get pegged(sexual fantasy) that shouldnt be something you should judge them over. If you have any fantasies or preferences yourself it would be good to both be vulnerable about what you would want. Thats just my opinion though
Being criminals turns them on
Know when to talk and when to listen.
Think about it, especially when texting, is it really necessary to spend all that time going through every last little bit instead of saving something for next time? Or getting the topic on to something more fun like the sheets. Besides, it is definitely much more fun to let stuff like that be revealed naturally over time because the more you surprise her the more she will be impressed which means she will have a stronger desire so it is better to leave things up to the imagination unless otherwise necessary in that moment
Yeah, skip the intimate details right away and jump straight to talking about sex right away. FFS, no wonder some of you are single.
I really wish women could understand the process of going on a date from a male perspective. There no cookie cutter way for a man to be and if this is out of your character you'll never get a woman you're actually compatible with. Be yourself and if they dont like it fuck em
Great video as always, thank you Courtney!
I like predictability when it comes to intimacy. It makes life easier.😊If all women are like Courtney (AWALT) then I'm going my own way to maintain near perfect mystery 😊
What
Because many women are grown children.
Mysterious...I'm only 95% sure my neighbor is a secret killer. Owns a big house, no wife or "friends." No pets. Where does he go at 2 am every night on his motorcycle? Very mysterious...
Why is mysterious a prefix noun suffix and the Scooby's do adjective is you can grab sterio slighty and mystery slighty though you CAN not grab US slighty. Its really a very oxymoron of a word one word with such so much extra definitions and hidden meanings, good topic!
I never asked a woman for her name and neither I tell her my name first and foremost especially as far as public relations. If chase them like that that spells you need her more than she needs you
So now I need to be James Fucking Bond?!?! 6 foot, 6 inches, and 6 digits isn't enough anymore?
Extroverted guys need to be particularly careful here. Because we gain energy from being around others and love talking, we can wind up talking too much and oversharing. I only realized this recently and have taken some mitigating steps. Like I can tell a girl I just met A LITTLE about my love for Homeric poetry and how it inspired my own stores. I don't need to tell her about my my goal to travel to all the obscure places that supposedly sent ships to Troy just yet (unless she's really, really into it).
Now, I'm the type that can kind of get away with this because of my enthusiasm (and because I'm decently handsome). But I realized it was too much. Extroverts have a lot of advantages but need to be careful and not become windbags. This is where more introverted guys can actually have an advantage.
Thank you
Only mysterious if she finds you attractive.
I like your advice. It's very real and not kind of ''do good'r'' advice with bit's of bulls**t sprinkled in there. :) it's all very accurate and balanced. Nice! love from UK
Being mysterious is easy. Ask your date a question, then watch her talk about herself for 90 straight minutes. I am perfect mystery, in that they know nothing about me.
Spontaneity can be mysterious and fun.
Love your outfit Courtney I was just thinking about this yes I'm very mysterious all the time 🤣🥰
Being mysterious builds attraction and should only be in the beginning. It should also be natural and not forced. Theres no need to be mysterious once both parties are dating and getting to know each other. Im not saying tell EVERYTHING but you shouldn't be mysterious all day everyday that makes no sense. Open up to the right person gradually and be transparent. Be yourself, dont TRY to be mysterious.
it could be if a guy is just afraid of a forever type of love or conflicted with his own stuff and thinking it's better she don't have to go through your journey dealing with your baggage. i don't know for my own self if i really don't want forever love, but i would rather face my demons alone. i'd spare her the bumpy ride because it wouldn't be fair to her for me to have her go through that with a messed up guy like me.
I am great at this getting to know my potential next GF as she cuts my hair at work.
Just wear sunglasses to every date, and when you're ready to propose, take them off. Mysterious!
You can talk very beautifully Courtney 👌 so natural and so from the heart 👌 Great and we are really on the same page because you are very concerned with the feeling you get or that you give to people and those are the people who other people can tune nicely because you have a perfect feeling for it and you can convey and translate it perfectly to the man 😉🙏👌Greetings from the Netherlands 🧡🧡
Men have the advantage, with their biological clock, women do not have that advantage despite the spin we hear in the media, 1% of the women who are over 50, are able to have babies, this is a fact. I have 3 beautiful children, so what do I need a woman for, only childless men simp for women. My children bring me joy, and if a woman is there it is an added bonus. We men should appreciate the many Aces we have, we are at an advantage don't take less than your value. Remember a single parent is a No No, unless she is paying the complete bills in the house, because you are providing emotional support. Gone are the days when men will be the downtrodden sex. There is now the Global Dating Scene. Courtney thanks for your advice anyway. 🎉
Fabulous work ... Thanks ❤
It’s my pleasure!
@@CourtneyRyan I wish you a joyful weekend
you deserve a treat to rest and relax
we need your positive energy 🙏😂 🌴🌼🌿
once you know each other's geography completely, serious relationship becomes ugly, because you are going to do and experience the same thing again and again, first it was an unknown territory for both to be discovered, after knowing each other completely, there is nothing to be discovered any more, and to go on doing and experiencing the same things routinely is mechanically ugly.
I learned from my first and only marriage that I am useless at relationships. I'll always be alone. No Serial Killer.
She's in awe of my tism
The "Mystery Method" is manipulative, however.
They don't like mysterious men, they like mysteriousness because uncertainty is what drives passion to discover which is a huge part of the desire for 'mate' (which in the human dynamic complexity is more than just a mate, but a partner, lover, companion, friend),
but it's not the only part of the dynamic that should be valued and it needs to be with the awareness of its purpose/function in a HIGHER desire for the good thing that is bonding and family and community that is essential to human-connectedness and what is essential to establish/cultivate in a healthy relationship.
a better idea is to live toward freedom, for in freedom is uncertainty and the truth passion for life and experience of the unknown, together with a good partner, is the most exhilerating, fulfilling, meaningful experience to have/share with another
Most women I've known in my life, know nothing about me. I baffle them because I never discuss my personal, or love life (which I don't have). And they never really ask. I talk about work, the weather, sport, religion or politics.......but never myself. They've never asked, so I've assumed they never wanted to know.
Women don't know what they like, it also changes each day. Good luck gents
Thanks for sharing
Making marriage nearly impossible. Your partner will lose that mystery quickly.
Yet, women say that meeting a guy that is not so active on social media and very rarely flaunts things on Instagram, is a weird guy.
I don't talk much because I suck at talking to women.....so I don't.... they aren't interested if you have to chase them, so I don't......if they are, they will come around you.....and if nobody says anything to me, I don't interject my opinion.....I just listen to them
The problem with being attracted to a mysterious man is that the closer you get to him, the less mysterious he becomes. If this is the basis of the woman's attraction, it will fade quickly and Mystery Man will be thrown in the dumpster with the rest of them.
Overall, it creates excitement on her mind and she'll linger to that feeling.
I have been on this rodeo for so many years, I know it all but I'm exhausted with the current dating scene nowadays, I don't actively pursue anymore
As an older guy, i had to learn that less is more with women, less talking and less revelling too much, on the part of the guy, which creates mystery.
Its hard to do when you're face to face with a girl but its a game changer. The less you say the less change of saying the wrong thing.
I love you Courtney, thanks!
It’s my pleasure!
And here I was thinking that women like men who communicate...
You can still be an effective communicator while leaving a little to be desired!
@@CourtneyRyan I do talk a lot, that would be my problem.. lol
Can you do a video on the 5 Stages of Clingership?
So they like potential serial killers, Got it ✔️🤣👀
I think the real message here would be for men to slow down and listen. Not only will the person you’re courting see that you’re a good listener, but you can vet appropriately.
I don’t think actively withholding information is the right approach though. The whole “Being Mysterious” approach in hopes to”woo” a woman promotes bad/insecure behaviors. Secure women can pick that up in a heartbeat. They might like it for a while, then they’ll see you’re either avoidant or playing silly games.