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Amazed By The Qur'an 2013 - Nouman Ali Khan - Why is Getting Married Difficult?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 มี.ค. 2014
  • A sneak peek to Amazed By The Qur'an 2013 presented and hosted by Bayyinah Institute and Institute of Knowledge!
    Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan asks a panelist how to make the process of getting married easy.
    See more on www.bayyinah.tv
    Visit IOK at www.instituteof...

ความคิดเห็น • 213

  • @tkg3491
    @tkg3491 4 ปีที่แล้ว +165

    That’s why we need more sisters in the Dawah. She actually listened to the question, and gave an answer in the right perspective of the sister asking.

    • @AsifAnsari-nn8kk
      @AsifAnsari-nn8kk 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well basically she said the same thing in different wording.

  • @tariq980
    @tariq980 10 ปีที่แล้ว +251

    the sister gave the most practical advice

  • @alizehm341
    @alizehm341 5 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    its so nice to see a sister on the same stage as men where everyone is respected equally regardless of their gender. that is why I love islam

  • @DA3WA1412
    @DA3WA1412 10 ปีที่แล้ว +168

    I think the sister gave the best answer:)

  • @dhinchakr5894
    @dhinchakr5894 8 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    Evryone went a little off track even though very useful advise and opinions about things! However the sister just hit the bulls eye,she basically answered the question!

  • @az71003
    @az71003 3 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    All the men: there’s no 3 minute answer
    The woman: gives a 3 minute answer
    Mashallah

    • @az71003
      @az71003 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @RaciallyFilteredOut it's just an observation.

    • @danh4435
      @danh4435 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Those men are scholars. The disrespect in u.

    • @person81045
      @person81045 ปีที่แล้ว

      Put away your feminism please.

    • @az71003
      @az71003 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@person81045 😂
      if it was the other way round
      would you have said, "put away your misogyny please"?
      my point here was that female questions are better answered by females because we understand each other better. no hate towards all the male sheiks and doctors on stage. they're amazing people mashallah, but again, female questions are better answered by females

    • @GuysCupank
      @GuysCupank ปีที่แล้ว

      It's because we can't understand women 😂

  • @solomansaeed1268
    @solomansaeed1268 7 ปีที่แล้ว +116

    I can give a short answer to this question:
    Guys! DONT be scared of over-educated girls. They are more aware, flexible and understand you better than undereducated girls. "A little bit of knowledge nourishes your ego, but more of it make you humble"--That is exactly true.
    Go out there, and propose an overeducated girl today!

    • @danh4435
      @danh4435 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The west is a perfect example of feminist because of dumb education outside islam.

    • @cooljool1
      @cooljool1 ปีที่แล้ว

      over educated girls are unattractive

  • @MsTuba42
    @MsTuba42 10 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    Please we want more of this kinds of discussions where all the scholars come together for advice and finding the solution for Our problems in western countries. Jazakum Allah hu khirun.

  • @danh4435
    @danh4435 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    There's a simple answer. Getting married is difficult because we have left the sunnah way....

  • @fatimaanjum9857
    @fatimaanjum9857 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    not only was she able to answer the question beautifully, but the smiles on the faces of the male scholars showed how much they appreciated having a woman scholar there as well to state the matter from a woman's perspective. that is what truly being muslim is like. you appreciate the goodness in each other instead of having negative feelings like jealousy when you see someone excelling in goodness. beautiful mashaAllah. we should always be happy for others and we should always get inspired by those who are guided and never stop working on getting better. may Allah guide us all to the right path and keep us on the right path, Ameen.

  • @meyoutube6953
    @meyoutube6953 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Mashaa Allah. How beautifully the sister answered the very problem.

  • @zubeidashariff
    @zubeidashariff 10 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    SubhaanAllah. So proud to be your cousin Sheikh Noaman Baig, keep up the good work.

  • @aqsaali2670
    @aqsaali2670 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I m facing the contrary circumstances of not finding someone good for me since i was 18,people come and criticize my skin complexion n reject me everytime so my parents let me continue my studies n i got rid of depression now because i found so much time to explore other things.

    • @sirajahmad4661
      @sirajahmad4661 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      May Allah give you more success , Ameen

  • @eshanwill
    @eshanwill 9 ปีที่แล้ว +80

    you know what would be cool is the head of the masjid do like small surveys or have a sign in on how many people young men are looking to get married and have them write down their name their job and what they are looking for mainly rather then the perfect one and email the other masjids and let them know in that community hey i have this brother his name is such in such cause some people family make it hard so it would cool if instead of going online to find a women the masjid could have thier own system similar to the online one except its free, harmeless no inappropaite messages no pictures unless the parents require it and the masjid can only show the parents you know i cant really explain but I have been wanting to get married and its impossible with my family and i dont know any sisters and stuff and i dont mind marrying outside my culture because Islam should be the culture for us Muslim along with our Deen Culture is just another way of saying our way of life. Yeah but I dont know just a thought

  • @wiesaalabrahams7700
    @wiesaalabrahams7700 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Well done sister for answering so beautifully. Doing you best and Tawakkul 👌❤️. May Allah make it easy for all Ameen

  • @sweetcarefulheart
    @sweetcarefulheart 10 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Yes not sure why it's hard. We just have to trust and stay hopeful Inshallah.Allah swt has created a companion for all of us.

  • @sanjida3207
    @sanjida3207 10 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    SubhanAllah!
    This is something so important for someone like me who due to her surroundings has turned out to be an Anti-marriage!

  • @bismillah5990
    @bismillah5990 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    To get marry the right person, make Dua on Sujood. In Hadees our Prophet (salah) said ; " What of the case where Slave is more beloved to Allah, than to see him Prostrating and his Face in the Dirt". And this is how i Dua for my brother for his marriage and it's happened.

  • @pearlsofthequran1485
    @pearlsofthequran1485 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Sh.Muslema is so nice and calm.. I love her talk..

  • @MurtezaAFG
    @MurtezaAFG 10 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    Solution # 2 stop going over the top with weddings. You don't need to spend 40K+ on a wedding!

    • @UstadKadirMisiroglu
      @UstadKadirMisiroglu 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      +MurtezaAFG
      100% correct! This is unfortunately most of the time the main reason that cause boys to delay their marriage. Money and marriage is like water and oil with emulsifier these days. You need at least 40k to function as a emulsifier in some situations. Better no get married than being an emulsifier you want to say, but still it is hard I know.

    • @misreesarguro727
      @misreesarguro727 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      True. Feed the poor with all that money. Fat cats must go on diets

    • @m402363
      @m402363 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      true! the more you spend/waste the less blessing and happiness there is in your marriage! don't waste!!

    • @hafiz7008
      @hafiz7008 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      damn you just dissed all the desis

  • @khalidhabib1552
    @khalidhabib1552 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    In my opinion being unmarried is much better than being bad husband or father .

  • @Hiba17121
    @Hiba17121 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    The sister gave a very good answer Masha Allah 👍

  • @Dust2Turaab
    @Dust2Turaab 10 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    SubhanAllah, amazing discussion! Hit the nail right on the head. This truly is a huge problem in our society, but I think something very important is balance. It's all good saying people should get married early and balance student life and marriage, but practically that doesn't always work. For sure, fathers are going to be worried for their daughters if the potential husband is not earning... And that is a true and valid concern.
    However I agree totally with the points by the sister about parents being angry at the daughter, when truly if there is a person they want to blame (although it is all in Allah's hands), they should blame themselves. MashaAllah they do a great job in raising a muslimah who is educated and has Hayah so obviously she is not going to feel comfortable after that upbringing approaching brothers herself, after all it is their duty.
    Also, what Shaykh Omar said about parents raising kids with skills for marriage and Shaykh Abdul-Nasir nailed it when he said about the concern for education, but where is the concern for marriage?
    May Allah guide our Ummah and help our respected parents to make the best decisions and help the youth to have patience and not give in to their nafs. Allahuma Ameen!

  • @nadiasultana6322
    @nadiasultana6322 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Ma-sha-allah
    I am Bangladeshi
    Always listening Numan Ali Khan speak
    Alhamdulillah,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  • @NorzDalz93
    @NorzDalz93 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I really admire Ustad Suleiman expressing his appreciation and satisfaction with a sincere grin after Ustadzah Muslimah expressed her thoughts and gave advices towards unmarried muslim women experiencing this crisis💕 11:53.

  • @maryamsaleh6417
    @maryamsaleh6417 10 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    the rest of this video must be amazing omg can someone post it.

  • @akai8632
    @akai8632 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Subhanallah what an amazing panel!! Shaikh Abdulnasir Adresses the issue, then shaikh Nouman gives some insight on the causes of the issue, then Ustadh Nouman gives an insight of how relatable the issue is, then Imam Omar sets an amazing example of himself and passes on an important life lesson and finally Shaikhah Muslemah adresses the wrong approach of parents to this problem and how to deal with it. Amazing!! I see that many people have found the shaikah's advice to be the most practical in their case, but I must say Imam Omar's was just as important, practical and relatable. May Allah bless them all.

  • @YasmineSay719
    @YasmineSay719 10 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Sh Nasir!!! That was AMAZING!!!! I agree with you wholeheartedly. Wow!!! No one ever says that!!

  • @snatasha8182
    @snatasha8182 10 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    MasyaAllah, although this talks also emphasize on how parents should not questioning about destiny, somehow I gained much better perspective for myself. I too need to believe in destiny, in qada' and qadar of Allah. Allah is All Knowing and His plan will execute at the right time. Allahu :)

  • @peace3842
    @peace3842 8 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    Brilliant response by the sister! What's the sisters name?

    • @araz5367
      @araz5367 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Sheikha Muslema Purmul

  • @farhakhatoon6741
    @farhakhatoon6741 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Only a woman understands what another woman is going through all the male scholars didn't even properly understood the question actually asked and started giving their own perspective some said why not getting educated after marriage but not everyone's situation are same after getting married some dont even get time to take care of their personal self and education becomes far off ....life of a girl or a woman is very difficult as compared to the males ...they say follow our Prophet in terms of marriage being gud to ur wives but is it actually so that everyone does really follow the prophet the way he behaved with his wives.....some girls do really get gud husbands just as a friend but we can't ignore the percentage when others dont even get a gud man to share their feelings with...staying as husband n wife but are strangers to each other....sometimes life becomes so difficult for a girl that she has no where to go neither to her parents home nor to her husband's home and at that time what really counts when u are educated.....sometimes it s so treacherous that girls feel that they wished they had never Been married......marriage should b a blessing not a curse..

    • @sabaghausia904
      @sabaghausia904 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well said.. It's absolutely true.. May Allah Taa'la bless us righteous spouse. Ameen♥

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      Bilkul sahi kah rahi hun. Mashallah.

    • @cooljool1
      @cooljool1 ปีที่แล้ว

      there's always time for education but not for marriage. the reason they dont get a good man is because they're unattractive

  • @shaynelahmed6323
    @shaynelahmed6323 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    My experience is parents , when looking for a match for their son are actually SEEKING a "daughter in law" for themselves!the needs of the son are last on the list! Parents seek a housemaid and a carer for themselves..not a "wife" and partner for their sons...they generally "import" a bride from a s.e.asian country.
    Educated single women dont connect with green card hunter imported "husbands"... So their lot is tough!

  • @pan.africafairtradenigltd
    @pan.africafairtradenigltd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Salam Alaykum Waramotullahi Wabarakatu, May Allah SWT bless you all in this world and next. Jazakallahu Khairan.

  • @51Saffron
    @51Saffron 10 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I often wondered why many Muslim women I knew in Utah were not married when Mormon women married around 18-20. Not saying that Mormon's didn't encourage their daughters to be educated, but in their faith the most important thing was to get married and have children. I worked with a Muslim lady who was 36, her sister was 34, and her other sister was 32. None of them were married.

    • @cooljool1
      @cooljool1 ปีที่แล้ว

      thats because they're unattractive or wait too long to do something about it

  • @arifasiddiqui9725
    @arifasiddiqui9725 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I have seen in my locality 2-3 sisters were facing problems in this regard..
    Since, I'm also in my early 20's ,I sometimes feel that is it ohk for me that at this age we haven't yet got a proper proposal for me.
    Mashallah,I'm sure I'm not desperate but it do bothers me at times when I see people bragging about their daughters having many proposals.
    May Allah subanahu wa-ta-aala grant us peace and do the best to us.

  • @thebachu786
    @thebachu786 10 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Mashallah, a great discussion. definitely agree that we need to re prioritize marriage in the Ummah.
    weddings should be simple, and young men and women need life skills. Parents, raising a spoiled brat is a guaranting divorcee in 20-30 years.

    • @thebachu786
      @thebachu786 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hi6867
      what you say doesn't make sense. It is the opinion of most scholars that you should marry as soon as you are able to financially. A successful marital unit is the foundation of a healthy society. What the west is promoting of nothing but misery and poverty for young lovers.

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not 20.30 mostly just within 2.3 years if they are lucky to last that long.

  • @crispykool19
    @crispykool19 10 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    4:06 hahah EPIC!!! that reaction of br. nouman!! :D:D

    • @araz5367
      @araz5367 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      lolol we all know what he was thinking

    • @rakiabey553
      @rakiabey553 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol

    • @FaisalKhan-iw6tw
      @FaisalKhan-iw6tw 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well HE IS MashaAllah NOW

  • @anjummariyah3503
    @anjummariyah3503 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I can relate so much to what this lady has to say! My family members have literally told me that may be I am not good enough for which no proposals come for me or no one wants to marry me . At some point of time i was also told why dont i have a boyfriend or why am I not dating anyone and arrange marriage doesn't exist anymore! Blah blah! I cannot tell you how insulted i felt every time!

    • @daliatalat5341
      @daliatalat5341 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sister i know it's very late to read your comment but i am so sorry for you, may Allah give you the person who will protect you and take your hand to Jannah

  • @luzdelunastewart5229
    @luzdelunastewart5229 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    amazing subject .......JAZAKUMULLAHO KHAIRAN (y) (y)

  • @RaficDalati
    @RaficDalati 10 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    We see more unmarried sisters nowadays than unmarried brothers which is sad to see... I believe that the reason why prophet Muhammad SAW told us we are allowed to marry more than one woman has started to come up in our society more. It is just to balance these imbalances in our society.

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I see the birth rate of female children is increasing very rapidly. Problems are already here and it will get worse in future

  • @missieA18
    @missieA18 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    SubhanaAllah it so so true, this is situation is so common and if anything it's growing!
    It is indeed difficult for a sister to study after marriage but it is not impossible. We have just got to set our priorities right and be conscious of the Akhirah when making major decisions.
    May Allah make it easy on the families who are going through this. Ameen.

  • @studentvanGod
    @studentvanGod 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Thank you Allah for teaching me.

  • @nasrineable
    @nasrineable 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    All I want to say is I love all of the speakers specially Norman whom I met in London. Alhamduillah. Yes my opinion is back home we during a wedding we used to have mixed one where men and women sit in one Hall then either the unmarried one will like someone or the parent will see and ask their hands. But now in the uk things are different. No mixing. Well how will unmarried one meet then. Also on a wedding you look at your best. So it's easier and u also have you mahrem with you in a wedding. I use to get lots of people asking for my hand back home. When I came here everything is difference. Man are scared to look or propose. Then I found someone on single Muslim n Insha Allah we will marry this year. So good luck. Insha Allah makes it easy.

  • @87nus
    @87nus 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    well I had similar thoughts--1. parents and society should encourage their girls/boys to looking for a spouse in early 20s and the parents should do it too for their kids while keeping their educational goals in place.
    2. For girls/boys both, getting married and making a family should be a goal too along with their plans for future career and degrees.

  • @akay6846
    @akay6846 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The sisters answer is amazing.

  • @vaseem255
    @vaseem255 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    We ask Allah to make you steadfast in adhering to His religion and to guide you.
    We advise you to be patient, careful and wise in making decisions

  • @roshnitasnim2757
    @roshnitasnim2757 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I should have watched it 8 years ago. But Alhamdulilah, i finally watch it ❣️

    • @GuysCupank
      @GuysCupank ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here

    • @roshnitasnim2757
      @roshnitasnim2757 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@GuysCupank Allaah is the best planner so keep believing in his plan

  • @sobiariaz5211
    @sobiariaz5211 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    May Allah swt grant evryone a good spouse. Meanwhile.. focus on the good and iA it will come. Ameen 🙏

  • @saniaaziz8134
    @saniaaziz8134 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Best thing MashaAllah of Bayyinah that they solve issues together not one

  • @shoukonishimiya3686
    @shoukonishimiya3686 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Omar Suleiman face is always bright mashaallah

  • @SAIFU1
    @SAIFU1 10 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Doesn't Islam encourage early marriage why is it such a difficult thing to say that's a responsibility in it self

  • @waheedakarim4559
    @waheedakarim4559 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Awesome reply by sheikh Nasir!

  • @raziasultana9591
    @raziasultana9591 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It's been sad reality but we all are suffocating now with this cultural norms and I really experience in my life getting married I's difficult but u know what in ur own family member the people whom u think they are supporting u but they will also blame u if u reject the proposal if u think it not compatible for u .They will give u undertone a sense of feeling that u r nothing but a burden in the home. May Allah subhanawatala bless me and all of us a good spouse aamin

  • @OB.x
    @OB.x 10 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I stopped at :40 seconds to make this comment, I will finish the video inshAllah.
    I would LOVE to marry a girl that is "too educated". A girl that can make me genuinely feel stupid, is the perfect girl for me :). And not because I'm a guy and we're men, just stupid in general. But a girl that can put me in my place because I called something a fricative, which it is actually a velar sound. :) Even before my reconversion, I felt this way, nothing turned me off quicker than a girl who acted dumber than she really was.

  • @yousafzaifrnd
    @yousafzaifrnd 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have a suggestion that be in touch with your community from where you migrated. This will help a lot. Although, there will be some more less adjustment, but that is not a great deal.

  • @prins74
    @prins74 10 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    it is a very cheap talk when you say: 'go and marry' . What when you have no one,no parents ect .? In my case i want to marry ten years ego but still unmarried .

    • @aphr0d
      @aphr0d 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Are you married now?

    • @nabeelhakeem3593
      @nabeelhakeem3593 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Be patient sis. We all at some point are worried if we will get the perfect spouse. I hope you found yours.

  • @MuhammadHamza-ki3ze
    @MuhammadHamza-ki3ze 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    In Pakistan it is the last priority of the parents to get their children married. They think that they should get a handsome job before they ask for some girl's rishta. this is the worst thing. every single man and women have their food already written. it will definately find them. We need to get out of the duniyah and get into the deen a bit more. We are more materialistic than required. May Allaah guide us and protect us from sins.

  • @ruuoxi
    @ruuoxi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    the lady micdropped it 😂

  • @supplegrey3613
    @supplegrey3613 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm making an Ikhtiar to find compatible brother, Qadarullah still not end up in marriage yet. I feel content with that situation and I believe Allah will give me in the right time. But, it's true, pressure from family, friends and relatives that makes me uneasy with it.

  • @uah9
    @uah9 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    its not that easy to just go out there and get married when a lot of the problem is with the parents too.. try getting a girl's hand in marriage when you don't have qualification or a job (when you are in studies)

  • @NeonnaCh
    @NeonnaCh 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I kind of disagree that we need to learn responsibility before getting married because you can't really see if a person is responsible or not, just because they never got a part-time job. I was spoiled by my parents and I was disallowed from working even though I wanted to. There are countless times I wanted to apply for a job and my mother would warn me not to and I didn't. But I know what responsibility is and I've never spent my money on anything too expensive just for the sake of the brand and whatnot.

    • @MotorStorm66
      @MotorStorm66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I kind of agree; some people say that you need to be a saint to be 'ready' for marriage. 😒

  • @minajadaa1869
    @minajadaa1869 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I wish the best of luck and a ling happy life for those who find good marriage.

    • @arshemoalla
      @arshemoalla 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      That is why Sheikh Nasir's advice makes sense

  • @medinacheikhmedias
    @medinacheikhmedias 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    #1 Men run away from family/social pressures that tend ask them for a Top Job, Plenty of cash, and a Tom cruise look... -> specifications
    #2 Women only want to commit to marriage when they get close to 29 !
    #3 There are plenty of families who think only their likes are "the best/chosen" humans to be with...

  • @yasminiqbal570
    @yasminiqbal570 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    After nine years the problem is as such. The suggestions of all the schollars are good. It requires total reprogramming of parents/ society.
    May Allahtala help all of us.

  • @mlepi5217
    @mlepi5217 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    After my first divorce which is now 10 years behind my father is really putting me under pressure. I am now a 32 young woman and it is really hard to find a suitable person for me. And Iam sick and tiried of dating apps . Really don’t now what to do. Iam getting older and older having no kids in this age is really frustrating. Don’t want to commit sin either. And I don’t know how long I can hold myself back. Who will take me when Iam older than 32 ?? In the Arab culture I am a grandmother who is not interesting to marry. My train has passed the station.....this is frustrating. I don’t know what to do . Shall I wait another century for my destiny or shall I date every day one guy from an app and find a man ?

  • @eshanwill
    @eshanwill 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    As Salam I think today it's hard to get married not because Muslims dont want to marry, I think it's cause we live in time period where being a boyfriend and girlfriend is as close as marriage gets, and some of the cases we hear on marriages are most of the time bad, I went on single muslim and other websites and from what I saw was a lot of divorced sisters more than actual single never been married before sisters, and on their profiles they state that they want a man who is educated and can provide rather than a man who has Allah has his sustainer, there are some sisters who want a pious man but the majority want a man who can provide and I don't blame the sisters for wanting a man who can provide we live in a expensive world so its quite understandable but at the same time the main goal of marriage is to seek the pleasure of Allah is to protect ones self from being lost from the Deen of Islam, So I cant blame brothers and I cant blame sisters, The only thing we can do is ask Allah so many of us have different desires and agenda and if you truly make your desire marriage and you ask Allah with sincerity you'll get it but in todays world you have education career being wealthy such things like these have become a greater desire for us than marriage is. The delusion of the world has made us blind to the pleasures of the Deen. Like Marriage its a blessing and a pleasure. What do I know nothing Allah knows everything, InshaAllah we all find pious spouses.

    • @bmohamud
      @bmohamud 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Imraz Ali
      😭😭So true brother and Ameen!

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      you said it right bro. The false expectations and lofty dreams of this materialistic world by the girls, and girls and boys both being far away from religion. Not knowing the purpose of their life are the basic reasons for it

  • @user-eo2th2lf6f
    @user-eo2th2lf6f 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    4:08-4:11 look at the way he looks at him lol

  • @Lexcepcion
    @Lexcepcion 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Am I the only one giggling at Omar’s blank face? 5:05😂

  • @hamzamusaddaq1515
    @hamzamusaddaq1515 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    A good discussion but there's alot more to this and in the current world it is really hard to be looking for a spouse, or even having one at a young age of let's say 18 or 19 years old.
    Will you focus in school or will you focus on making a living with your spouse and tending to her needs? Omar made a good point that a man with mental maturity and that knows how the world works is better than a mentally immature man with a 4.0GPA. But I'd imagine it'll be hard to youngsters trying to get a solid degree so they can get into a solid line of work to provide for themselves, but when their attention is now directed way to their significant other, there has to be some compromise that either the couple, or especially the families of that couple who aren't comfortable with that.
    It's understandable that yes, a guy should be financially stable to take care his own wife and family, but no job in the world during university can provide that stability for 2 people. I might be wrong but I'd imagine its very difficult.
    Thank allah I'm on the path of thinking of marriage instead of haram pre-marital relationships. But it's clearly not feasible in chasing a good education like a degree and taking care of a spouse unless there's a compromise.
    One solution I see is that the families happily able to support a young couple in their financials until they receive a degree so they can work full time and make a good living for themselves. But this goes against Omar's point. In a way you kinda handing over "life" as he puts it. Personally I wouldn't want to feel like I'm taking hand outs, even under the notion of that I'll be protecting myself from the fitna of this world. Again I might be wrong, but from what I've seen it's very very rare for a a couple to be married at such a young age to have support given by the families so they don't have to worry about financials and so they can focus on their education while tending to one another. May Allah make us patient and make it easier for us.

  • @humanityfirst1551
    @humanityfirst1551 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jkhairan.. cld u plz upload the full lecture?

  • @Abdul-kp9nb
    @Abdul-kp9nb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    3:25 💚Subhan'Allah Subhan'Allah Subhan'Allah
    Subhan'Allah💙.

  • @abdbag1544
    @abdbag1544 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Mothers are the most important people they are the ones how mold there children .If not then out side world mold them in its norm.

  • @alltimetruth4895
    @alltimetruth4895 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Important this discussion group

  • @tina2mina
    @tina2mina 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Taking everything into consideration with all due respect, what do we do when situations or circumstances are out of your control? And also what is needed to be done when one is extremely timid, reserved, and doesn't have outside interactions with any muslim opposite gender? I am in a very tight situation where my parents are living in separate countries due to immigration issues and that is supposedly a hindrance in me getting married. Then I live a robotic life with the same daily routine every single day. Work to home, Home to work. The men I meet at work are not muslim, so reaching out to anyone at work is out of the question. I am not an extrovert. For the life of me, I cannot put myself out online on social network sites and try to force an interaction with a stranger. And then to top it all, the cultural barrier, where it has to be a muslim from my ethnic background, from being from the same country to even being from the same state within that country. With all these restrictions, how is one supposed to seek the opposite gender in order to get married???

    • @faisalkudcs
      @faisalkudcs 10 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well, i would say that your concern is absolutely valid. I hope your close friends also know that you have been looking for a spouse. I have seen people getting married using the online services. But, does it work for everyone? Becomes a real question. You can have your online presence and limit the interaction, in a way that is convenient for you. Meanwhile, you would also judge the intentions of the person, if the person has pure intentions or not. A cultural barrier is also a problem itself, where a man/women are simply uncapable of taking a spouse from a different cultural background. Above all we are one Ummah, we are Muslims. People should think in such a way. Convince your parents that how important it is to get married, even some parents say that can't you wait for some time. Tell them i have no time to wait. I want to complete half of my deen.

    • @ruuoxi
      @ruuoxi 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      hello!salam I wish to know how are you right now, did you get over your difficulty on finding spouse? I would like to know how too 😊

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      In your situation it takes a major miracle for you to get married. No a joke... really what you said....you wont even get married in 299 years

  • @noorainfathima1821
    @noorainfathima1821 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    where can I find the full video ?

  • @cosainipa3053
    @cosainipa3053 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Where's the whole session? Can't find it in bayyinnah tv

  • @towhidarahman7819
    @towhidarahman7819 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    If possible please give subtitle. Bangladesh

  • @a.s.tarapuri8956
    @a.s.tarapuri8956 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Is the full video going to be published??

    • @araz5367
      @araz5367 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      i think its on bayyinah tv- you have to subscribe to it to access the videos

  • @sabakhan_s786r
    @sabakhan_s786r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ma sha Allah ✨

  • @believer-fcaeth
    @believer-fcaeth ปีที่แล้ว

    "Do not marry polytheistic women until they believe; for a believing slave-woman is better than a free polytheist, even though she may look pleasant to you.
    And do not marry your women to polytheistic men until they believe; for a believing slave-man is better than a free polytheist, even though he may look pleasant to you. They invite you to the fire while Allah invites you to paradise and forgiveness by his grace. He makes his revelations clear to the people so perhaps they will be mindful." (Al-baqarah 2:221)
    th-cam.com/video/Xvf2tOr0ya47/w-d-xo.html
    Please share this verse with every muslim sister in your contact list without hesitation just for the sake of Allah 🙏

  • @hashmatshaik9422
    @hashmatshaik9422 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omar Suleiman is right.I am a good student in college but o dont know how to deal with life.
    When i was out of college o realised it was all about money.You should know how to earn money.

  • @reversegear1440
    @reversegear1440 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What is the appropriate age for girls to get married according to Sunnah? And would it make any difference if the parents of the girl ask for boy's proposal for their girl???

    • @bobboo2733
      @bobboo2733 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      There is no age. I guess it's when you find the right person. The earlier the better.

  • @abubakersidik493
    @abubakersidik493 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    A good spouse will never accept the proposal if the brothers dont have a PHDs or 100s degree certificate or collection of private jets.

  • @lightningandthunder2861
    @lightningandthunder2861 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    I hope i am not being judgmental but some has to do with luck some being reserve good girls do not talk to opposite sex & it is scary because you do not know the intentions of the other person,
    Or being too outgoing party etc
    or not having decent education, not high paying job or ordinary looks, looks are very important in desi culture.
    There are also lot's of other reason;
    Mothers tries to live their lives through their daughter
    They talk bad about their own husband
    being humble & taking
    Care of their own husband is most of the time considered backward so girls rather be themselves then take a chance
    May Allah have mercy

  • @cosainipa3053
    @cosainipa3053 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Where can I watch full plssse

  • @sdomain7018
    @sdomain7018 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sister mashallah gave a good answer. What I can’t understand and probably will never understand is why guys are literally scared of educated women. Is it bcz of their ego or is it something else? I have never heard any guy or sheikh explaining why this happens or give advice to guys or try to change their mentality on this issue. This is a major issue in our Muslim society. Tho it shouldn’t be an issue especially in Muslim community where our religion tells us to be educated.

    • @MotorStorm66
      @MotorStorm66 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Maybe it's because educated women are often said to be too 'feminist', i.e. they might try to deny some of the husband's Islamic rights as they might've been influenced by certain western feminist ideas which are at odds with widespread Islamic views of gender roles

  • @zahraalhassan4238
    @zahraalhassan4238 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    this is so deep

  • @mohsinku
    @mohsinku 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Is na-mehram woman allowed sit among men and participate in men's gathering for discussion? plz provide reference

  • @alimo2000
    @alimo2000 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What about mix marriages? Sometimes if you only wants to be with someone from your origin then it's going to be little hard

  • @slaveofallalh786
    @slaveofallalh786 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Salam to all of people of Islam, the society I come from we have this issue the most girls are busy educating themselves given the right pressure from keeping themselves away from Haram, where the so called Muslim men are hanging out all night getting Haram relationships with as many as they can find theire hands on!!! When it comes down to marriage the girls are more educated then themselves and they want the girl to be one who is ticking all the right boxes they will not settle with the ones they have been with!!??? How unfair and how disgusting are those men and their families.

    • @adibasdas
      @adibasdas 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      +musarat ahmed where is this place?

    • @letsnot6227
      @letsnot6227 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sorry this reply is a bit late...as you mentioned all of the people of Islam I think I have the right to speak on atleast my behalf that yes..there is problem. But the problem is not only at one side. Most of it stems from distance from religion. Doesnt matter its guys or girls....these days it's a universal problem. Boys girls...all. they dont know who they are. Where they come from and what is the purpose of their life. Just saying that guys are parting hard and not thinking about marriage is not the only problem. Therr is also a big problem from womens side. When they hope and dream for something so unrealistic and put conditions on prospective grooms to be that Inclued the lofty standards of job and wealth., level of western education and totally disregard what is the level of religious education and what is the character of the Guy. That's where the main problem lies. Girls and their families want a rich, western educated prince charming for their wives who also must be a good slave to her demands and her desires. They please tell me... how can this problem go away. When the whole base of the society is stagnant. The institution of marriage is revolving around pathetic unrealistic standards then who will accept these demands ? I see the problem getting far far worse in coming years than what it is now. Muslims have tj wake up and have a good look at the society that where it all is heading towards.

  • @Dogheadmaster
    @Dogheadmaster 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Maybe because it is hard to find Muslim women who are attractive. In Pakistani and the Indian subcontinent the women look like men or are bigger with more hair. It is almost impossible to find a women pleasing to the eye in the Muslim world

  • @ayanali4795
    @ayanali4795 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I BELIEVE THIS IS A TEST FROM ALLAH.
    Turn back to Allah and ask for help because its only Allah who can help and ease your situation.
    AND
    Its time for sisters not to share thier problems with guys, this guys will just laugh at your faces or behind your backs for this difficulties you are going through.
    Its better you consult fellow female scholars who understands your pain better.

  • @sirajahmad4661
    @sirajahmad4661 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    There are men in stage not married and there is beautiful learned lady in the stage and no one is thinking of that and they are out to advise others.
    Why not start from yourself ?
    Please set a good example and do tawakul!

  • @sabhji9780
    @sabhji9780 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Why is that lady sitting among those men? That also in front of the audience!!! Are these people real scholars?

  • @asiar609
    @asiar609 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I would like to make a request to Bayyinah institute that tell their shaykhs and imams to be respectful when they are talking about sisters questions and their problems. Sister’s send there question in respect to these guy’s to know the answers. These guys sitting there laughing and joking about it. Its not funny they should learn to respect. Thats why women should get education in Islamic studies so women can answer the questions from sisters. To be honest out of all them the sister gave the best advice or answer according to the question. Respect women any women no just woman in your family give respect gain respect the perfect Islamic society.

  • @abulhussain-ck7rd
    @abulhussain-ck7rd 10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Everyone is materialistic due to media and western lifestyle, women are more affected by this due to their natural gender psychology, That is until reality hits them, sisters dont realise they will not hold onto their beauty byond 23 when it goes down hill from there on , very fast. Add to that the history someone builds up due to staying single for too long. We might have a situation inthe future where there is too many divorcees and unmarried in their 30+ who will despise married couples trying to separate them, which will only mean- well you can work out the rest.

  • @musabbirhossainnibir1480
    @musabbirhossainnibir1480 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Is it allowed in Islam to have a joint conversation of men and women like this show?

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes. In Islam, Men and women are both required to educate themselves to the highest degree and are spiritually equal.

    • @musabbirhossainnibir1480
      @musabbirhossainnibir1480 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@alishawaq6378 What was my question? And what is your answer?

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@musabbirhossainnibir1480 I answered your question.Even in the time of the Prophet(SAW), women would mingle with the Sahaba and the Prophet(SAW) himself, as long as it was respectful, for halal purposes and in a halal manner.

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@musabbirhossainnibir1480 How else can Muslim scholars, male and female, discuss in front of everyday Muslims?

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      What is your answer to your question?

  • @frosty1814
    @frosty1814 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    regarding to learn to earn at young age i've done this since high school but i've ended up desperate and hopeless because even i've worked from young age i couldn't done anything with that little money i earned and also now i haven't done anything and this is the main thing that kept me staying unmarried even tho im in the late 20 now the second thing is keeping me so desperate and to never be married and this another thing is seeing Hijabi sisters hanging out with boyfriends cheating on their husbands even with non muslim guys , and just if you wonder of the salaries of this country im living the main salary in private sector is 200-300 euros monthly in public sector you it is not that much either but you cant get a foot in because of the corruption especially if ur a practicing muslim and from that salary i mention -100 euro goes monthly for taxes and life is very expensive here elementary things are more expensive than in Germany or in the other rich EU countries , so can anyone of these brothers tell me how to be married in such a country and the main problem is we are isolated from moving to other Eu countries

  • @Saraii5690
    @Saraii5690 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Can a woman propose marriage?

    • @alishawaq6378
      @alishawaq6378 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes. Khadijah(RA), Prpohet(SAW)'s first wife did.

  • @adibasdas
    @adibasdas 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    but how the things are working, if we cant talk to girls what will i do to meet a girl? what are we going to do? will i just talk to his dad? no way. i am 21 and i dont want to wait until 26 or 28. why would i wait while many of my peers are chilling around with their girlfriends?

    • @tabinda460
      @tabinda460 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Because you are Muslim..this is something you follow you regard as muslim

    • @FishingAdventuresDubai
      @FishingAdventuresDubai 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's not about why should I wait when other or doing this and that. you should wait because it is the right thing to do. If you cant wait then do it the right way. Talk to girls or their families. Present your proposal..nobody is going to kill you for it. At most your proposal will be rejected. Tey again and again . Insha Allah eventually you will find someone who will agree to it. But end of the day it is your Qadr..whatever you get... so be thankful to Allah for every thing and pray to Allah for all your wishes.