Forced Marriages - That's Messed Up - Nouman Ali Khan

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 625

  • @samantham7812
    @samantham7812 9 ปีที่แล้ว +307

    its not just the daughters, unfortunately sons/brothers are also forced and blackmailed to marry a specific girl

    • @marium2815
      @marium2815 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      100% right

    • @omardrabick8323
      @omardrabick8323 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      You are correct, Ma’am. I have been trying to escape my forced engagement situation. I pray that Allah relieves Me of being forced to marry the girl my mother is forcing on Me. I also pray that He forgives my Mother for her sin.

    • @abdulMALIK-go2uq
      @abdulMALIK-go2uq 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      same for me brother may Allah help us all

    • @cookliet8444
      @cookliet8444 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Mostly girls. Nobody wants to bear a burden longer... 🙂 Even if your parents love you the most, you’re a burden in the end..

    • @AminulIslam-ee4vm
      @AminulIslam-ee4vm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same here not only girl their are many boys

  • @TheJ9966
    @TheJ9966 9 ปีที่แล้ว +260

    " when marriage is half your Deen and you're destroying people's marriage , these people are preventing people from the Deen of Allah " . Nouman Ali khan

  • @jimmyhendrix8407
    @jimmyhendrix8407 9 ปีที่แล้ว +218

    My cousin was forced into marriage two years ago. I was 16 and I had a close relationship to her and we understood each other well. I walked into my living room one day and saw my family staring at this guy's photo. I asked them who is that guy and they said "Your cousin's husband to-be". I didn't say anything, but a huge part of me felt that this wasn't right, especially when I asked them if she knew about this and they said no and the fact that they forced me to keep quiet and not tell her.
    What surprised me the most was that my parents didn't even stop my uncle or aunt and I thought they would. They're definitely more understanding of how bringing in culture into religion is just blatantly wrong.
    The worst part of all this was the decision was finalized between both families 6-7 hours before my cousin's 20th birthday. Clock struck 12:00am the next day, they had a "gift" to give her which was this. I pretended to be happy, I knew she wasn't happy but she didn't show it. She later told me that she doesn't like the guy etc. and she's not satisfied. She went into depression for a few months and then eventually got married.
    I can still tell to this day that she's not happy with her relationship.
    Now I regret not intervening and making sure whatever they did was with my cousins consent. But then again I was young and didn't have much knowledge.
    It's just sad how culture has taken over religion.

    • @Riyaanreality
      @Riyaanreality 9 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      That's so sad. May Allah make it easy for your cousin.

    • @seinnajune348
      @seinnajune348 8 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      YOU CAN STILL INTERVENE!

    • @romanmahad208
      @romanmahad208 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Jimmy Hendrix I agree its cultural practices not our Islamic religion practices

    • @tarekbania432
      @tarekbania432 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      this happened with my sister few years back and i couldn't intervened because i was young and me too know that she's not happy till this day. this thought haunts me everytime.

    • @marium2815
      @marium2815 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😢💔

  • @proQuran
    @proQuran 9 ปีที่แล้ว +287

    I could show a thousand of these videos to my parents, the problem is getting them to listen. As a desi, a lot of our parents would abandon their religion easily, but never their culture.
    Dua for my Ummah fam, this particular issue is such a serious one in my household, I just can't get through to my parents.

    • @aafiyaansari209
      @aafiyaansari209 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Its true😞
      I don't know why culture n society is soo imp to desi parents that they forget they're destroying so many things n lives with this.
      They're destroying their akhirah n also many lives

    • @mohdasad2579
      @mohdasad2579 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      absolutely true ...this thing is happening with me right now...without even informing me my parents planned my engagement with my cousin brother you guys wont believe i was in shock ,,a heart pain ..tears in my eyes ,,the tears which i cant even shed infront of them..even if i cry they will think it as oh she is shy>....i pray to god i get rid of that engagement ..dont know why in india girls are to forced to marry ..they dont even ask a girl whether she is okay does she wants to or is she ready ....exactly whatever nouman ali khan said in this clip is related to our family maybe related to the whole desi families ,,,may ALLAH SWT help us out ..

    • @aafiyaansari209
      @aafiyaansari209 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@mohdasad2579 Try to express your feelings to your parents and ur fiance before its too late.
      I'll pray for u InSha Allah. ALLAH will help u out of this👍🏻

    • @mohdasad2579
      @mohdasad2579 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@aafiyaansari209 in sha ALLAH TALA AMEEN ..JAZAK ALLAH KHYR FOR YOUR WISHES.MAY ALLAH SWT BLESS YOU WITH ALL THE HAPPINESS AAFIYA

    • @aafiyaansari209
      @aafiyaansari209 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mohdasad2579 THANK YOU SO MUCH. But please talk about it to your parents and your fiance before things run out of your hand

  • @RJ-uq6py
    @RJ-uq6py 4 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    If you are being forced, just scream "No!" in front of guests and officials. Set an example for other victims.

    • @haniahamid5696
      @haniahamid5696 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Absolutely 🤗

    • @islamisatruereligion8646
      @islamisatruereligion8646 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I will support this 💯💯

    • @Khansa-s_Bucket
      @Khansa-s_Bucket 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      😄absolutely

    • @TimTim__
      @TimTim__ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That’s a very very smart way I guess 😹

    • @reechan_8836
      @reechan_8836 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Lmao i did that and from that day Alhumdulilah i m grateful that i stood up for myself.

  • @farmidaahmed9949
    @farmidaahmed9949 9 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    This just shows how beautiful and pure our religion is yet people make it filthy by mixing in culture! SubhanAllah!

  • @humayrahijaz128
    @humayrahijaz128 9 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    Ive recently started listening to nouman ali khan. He answers the questions that trouble me, and make things so much simpler to understand. Motivates me a lot.

    • @muzhakkirali5958
      @muzhakkirali5958 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +Humayrah Ijaz Yeah he makes the complicated simple

    • @NabeelFarrukh
      @NabeelFarrukh 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      +Humayrah Ijaz He solved my Jihad against my self. He inspired me into becoming a better person in society. Along with other people. He is truly amazing and may allah bless this man.

    • @humayrahijaz128
      @humayrahijaz128 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +Nabeel Farrukh so true. The questions that run through my mind, that bother me so much, due to so many other opinions if other people, always confused me. So i came lookin for answers and he answers all the marriage, and in law issues that bother me. With such simple answers

    • @waedghassan1037
      @waedghassan1037 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      same for me

    • @Neat95Freak
      @Neat95Freak 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes same with me! Allah ygzee al khair he's amazing

  • @MsImaneS
    @MsImaneS 9 ปีที่แล้ว +427

    i wish my parents could understand English to watch this 😢

    • @syeddawood566
      @syeddawood566 9 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      May Allah make it easy for you !

    • @ibraheem8215
      @ibraheem8215 9 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      +Imanes88 Explain to them the meaning and pray to Allah to open their hearts to make them understand..Allah is able to do all things

    • @skippykipper101
      @skippykipper101 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      +Imanes88 What language do they speak? The video has Arabic subtitles

    • @MsImaneS
      @MsImaneS 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +timekkhan2012 thank you for the tip. bi tawfeeq inshaAllah 😊

    • @MsImaneS
      @MsImaneS 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +skippykipper101 really? I'll send it to my mom then.

  • @nadiaramzan2337
    @nadiaramzan2337 9 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Jazakallah Ustad, great topic. your kids are extremely lucky to have a dad like you. pray for all our brothers and sisters, I am 54 now and wish I know more when I was 25.

  • @lipsbreeze
    @lipsbreeze 8 ปีที่แล้ว +126

    please do this in urdu. please please please! please tell parents that they are ruining their sons/ daughters lives by forcing them. also some parents are just simply against love marriage regardless of whether the girl/guy being perfect. they're just against that idea as it ruins their prestige and image in their khandaan.

    • @invadazim4320
      @invadazim4320 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      If I understand what love marriage is, i'm guessing thats haram, as free mixing is haram.

    • @waqarhassan4618
      @waqarhassan4618 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      shafkat azim How on earth would love marriage be Harām?

    • @invadazim4320
      @invadazim4320 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Waqar Hassan Whats your definition of a love marriage? If its about dating and stuff, then its haram.

    • @alinababar1992
      @alinababar1992 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I am having the same issue brother/ sister. I feel like dying and so fed up. I am not having any issue with my parents. The issue is from boy's side :( Please pray for me

    • @alinababar1992
      @alinababar1992 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The guy I want to marry is being forced to marry a girl that is from his family.
      He wants to marry me. He took a stand but still nobody is listening to him. :(

  • @bloomingsdale00
    @bloomingsdale00 9 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    SubhanAllah, so true. Some people are just too obsessed with achieving their own happiness that they 'forget' about the happiness of others.

    • @kashifaarahams3787
      @kashifaarahams3787 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      yes, and these are our parents that do this.....very sad indeed.

  • @daniel1982641
    @daniel1982641 8 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    This is why I'm totally against forced marriages as well. It should be abolished completely. People from all walks of life should not be forced into marriage. In my opinion, it should always be optional. You can either choose to do it or not. Me, personally, I'd rather stay single until I die. That's my decision whether people like it or not and I'm glad I have parents and some relatives in my family who completely understand and respect my decision. I have cousins as well who totally agree with me on this and told me: "You are right." To me, it doesn't matter who wants to marry who regardless of race, religion, nationality, language, culture or whatever it is. If some people out there want to get married and have kids someday, that's their decision. People should be free to make their own choices and live their lives however they want. Keep on fighting to be free people. Do whatever it takes to be successful by chasing your own dreams and goals and never ever give up. Freedom is the greatest feeling for human beings from all walks of life. Take care of yourselves everybody. Peace & 1 Love

    • @WillPutYouToYourPlace
      @WillPutYouToYourPlace 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      If only everyone had that kinda freedom to decide for themselves 😖

  • @stbabyseal
    @stbabyseal 9 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    this made my teary eyed, i am going through this right now, when my parents are emotionally blackmailing me to marry someone who doesn't like the fact that I cover, they say i should marry him and responsibility of success of this marriage lies on me. Its been going on for years since i was 16, having to go through meeting prospective families who were not what i was looking for, i practice my religion alhamadulilah and these families want me to give up my religious way, i remember this time why my parents wanted me to meet ladies from an extended family of ours who rejected me because i cover, alhamadulilah later on we found out that they had converted to Judaism and nobody in the community knows. I feel depressed, atleast Allah is on my side. Pray for me, jazakAllah khair

    • @Riyaanreality
      @Riyaanreality 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Subhanallah! Sister that is so sad. May Allah make your situation easier and grant you a pious, loving and caring husband with whom you enjoy the goodness in Dunya and Akhira. Sit down with your parents in shaa Allah & tell them what type of spouse you prefer, show them this video and last but not least, pray Salatu istikharah and ask Allah for guidance, protection and to grant you a rightious husband. Then put your trust (tawakkal) in Allah in shaa Allah. I will pray everything goes well for you and please never compromise your religion. I know some people in situations like this look at you as if you are ignorant or rather "old school" because you actually follow your religion and they're like "join the modern world" and dress "nicely, blah, blah,..." but in shaa Allah try holding tight to your religion and never compromise it.

    • @stbabyseal
      @stbabyseal 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      riyaan Salaams, thank you so much remember me in your prayers

  • @Za3rour
    @Za3rour 9 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Lord knows I'm far from the faith, but whenever I watch one of his videos I feel a little closer. I owe him so much...

  • @Nomad314
    @Nomad314 9 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    My 'was-going-to-be-fiancé''s parents tried to force me into getting engaged when I was not ready. We were in discussions about possible engagement, but they tried to force me into it, told all their friends and family, arranged a big party, bought gifts etc without me even knowing about it. When I said I'm not ready for that they blamed me and told me I wanted to make all of them unhappy :/ it was very difficult to stand up for myself. I did not have someone to act as a wali at that time. They even said to me it is against Islam to refuse to participate in what they were trying to force me into :( it's sad because the son is not like that, just his parents.

    • @mehz_zzz4396
      @mehz_zzz4396 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Nomad314 you did right bro.
      May allah grant u immense strength and peaceful life

  • @boolibooli9752
    @boolibooli9752 8 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Men also should not be forced!!

  • @wardhaaa7295
    @wardhaaa7295 8 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Being guilt tripped is the most common method the parents and family use to get a girl married. This results in complete and utter psychological affects which stay with the girl for forever.

  • @muslimmenarewhoresdonttrus8695
    @muslimmenarewhoresdonttrus8695 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I know so many men and women who have been forced in to marriage that now they ate cheating on the husband/wife because their not happy! Zina, yes zina and I blame the parents who don't allow their children to marry people of their choice!

  • @fixedguitar47
    @fixedguitar47 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    “The Only Thing Necessary for the Triumph of Evil is that Good Men Do Nothing”
    Better not cross my path with this. I have no tolerance for abuse.

  • @hadiyaahsan5166
    @hadiyaahsan5166 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    please preach this in Urdu too bcz its a hugeee problem in IndoPak and parents who dont understand english wont get this.
    JazakAllah

  • @amalali360
    @amalali360 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    the other problem is that sharia law makes it extremely difficult to get a divorce. some woman wait years to get a divorce.
    while a man can get divorced by saying one word. no court. nothing.

  • @helansindi2658
    @helansindi2658 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I honestly love this series of that's messed up!! Doesn't feel like the usual lecture and catches the listeners attention. Nouman is awesome! Can't wait for more!

  • @kirinmalik9843
    @kirinmalik9843 9 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Parents manipulate their kids by telling them that obedience to your parents is a rule in Islam and therefore the kids have to marry the person their parents want them to marry. It disgusts me.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not obedience in matters pertaining to life altering choiices or haram things like pressure, forrce, criimes, fallse testiimoney, imorrality etc. Such parents need to be told forrce is haram and loyalti to Allah comes fiirst. In a respectful manner of course.

  • @shanoali9707
    @shanoali9707 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I just love LOVE your lessons. May Allah take you to Jannah InshAllah for teaching me and others so many things!!

  • @urwithash23
    @urwithash23 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    I wish my parents would understand English and I could show them. I am so emotionless when I am with him. I just don't like him. Not even our thoughts match. Its been just a month and I feel strangulated in this marriage

    • @halimatoudiallo7556
      @halimatoudiallo7556 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      May Allah help you sister i hope that one day all what you are going through will be arranged with the will of Allah..❤

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Why not bring a third party who can be an intermediary and help them understand? An imaam maybe who speaks their language too? Or show your parents the verrses from Quran and the ahadith to support your case?

  • @abdullahyaseer4304
    @abdullahyaseer4304 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Reading all e comments below, I realize how lucky I am to have been blessed with wonderful parents. With that said, I don’t understand why some of you people who were forced into marriage didn’t speak up or stick up for yourselves. Especially the men, I mean seriously how could you marry someone that aren’t attracted to or some one you don’t love. Live your life and stick up for yourself, your parents will come around in the end.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      My thoughts exact!y. Lots of females decrrying their future or past forrced marriages but nobody explains why they chose to say yes when asked at the time of the nikah? I mean durress and forrce aside, at that moment, not even the parents can will or forrrce them to say yes. Just say no and it's off the table. Will there be tears, angr, bllame, claims of lost honnor, currsing afterwards yes. It will also pass. If it's a matter of feeling their life is threatened then move out and go to the sociial services and or the poliice.

    • @CatsandAnimals213
      @CatsandAnimals213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Trust me i have been crying for days in front of my mother that i dont want to marrry where she wants me to. She agreed one day but i was terrified of the consequences. She wants me to get married before i turn 27. Im.not saying she hasnt fojnd a good proposal for me. Apparently everybodh think ts a good one but i am.not content. When she was about to say no i stopped her cuz then my life would have been more of hell than it already is. On top of all that, i am at home since 2019. My masters ended in 2018. Apart from the cursing and abuse that i will be facing after saying no, i wont be able to flee from it since i have nothing else to keep me occupied. She will never allow me to work or stufy furthet or anything that involves going out.
      My point is. Only thosr who have duch parent (s) can understand the pressure. Specially in pakistan u cant run away or anything.

    • @zamshaim
      @zamshaim ปีที่แล้ว

      Easier said than done in your 20s…as you grow older you built in more confidence

    • @TimTim__
      @TimTim__ ปีที่แล้ว

      @@rayyana.8538 Exactly. In our case, we can go to Islamic counsel and hand over them the matter to solve. But the mental torture one has to pass initially is very daunting which sometimes puts a barrier to think wisely. May Allah help us to be confident and courageous in every situation and make our affairs easy.

  • @TR-vt1tm
    @TR-vt1tm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Just heared today that my father wants me to marry his sister's daughter. Lucky I'm a man and don't need his permission for marriage. Must stand on my feet within next 3 years probably so I can escape.

  • @ridaa986
    @ridaa986 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Masah Allah..he explained what so many girls go through...Many parents consider society much more important then thier children's happiness...this also highlights the issue that parents make huge mistakes too which can ruin thier children's life...and then children's life becomes miserable then they put the blame on children...parents equally need to be aware not misuse thier very important status in Islam and thier children's life..May Allah guide us all towards the right path.Ameen

  • @MaidaA22589
    @MaidaA22589 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks you so much for addressing this serious issue, brother, prevalent in almost every place in my country.

  • @nihafarheen1045
    @nihafarheen1045 7 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    i wish my parents could understand this.
    they thnk Allah has givn them rite to do anythng with my life since dey gav birth to me.
    pls pray dat my prnts mentality chnge.

    • @aisha2683
      @aisha2683 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      are you ok now?

    • @mehz_zzz4396
      @mehz_zzz4396 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here sis.
      They think they have all right to do with our life.

    • @raishahasan04
      @raishahasan04 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mehz_zzz4396 same here 😭😭😭

  • @Mumsiken
    @Mumsiken 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was emotionally blackmailed by my uncles my mother was diagnosed with cancer and my father passed away when I was 11 . I have never been happy . I had a very depressive feeling when getting married I was not allowed to continue my studies and give up everything. I just pray this suffering ends in this world .

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You have options. Fiile for your divorce or khul, continue your studies, get a job, fullfil your dreams, be happy and when you are ready, marry somebody who you like and want to spend your life with.

  • @X007FL
    @X007FL 9 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    I PRAY BAYYINAH TV SEES THIS COMMENT! ... I really think some tips and solutions should be given please? How can a sister deal with this problem if it is happening to her with her family?? What should SHE do so she does NOT fall into this out of weakness/fear/pressure???

    • @farmidaahmed9949
      @farmidaahmed9949 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +faisal latif show them this video

    • @Lorecious
      @Lorecious 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Make a stand for yourself and for Allah and convince your parents through the wisdom sent by Allah
      Don't succumb to something that will destroy your deen
      At the same time do not disobey your parents or make a stand for some one who is away from Allah and will end up misleading you

    • @asd_911
      @asd_911 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I have watched a few of his videos - he says sometimes, just speak about the issue. Don't talk about the problems yet. Tiime for everything

  • @hamidab7167
    @hamidab7167 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I watched this and cried. My parents married me to someone who clearly had severe mental health issues. I was tortured for 14 years before he was given medication. My parents turned a blind eye. I suffer ptsd every day when I remember stuff. I can't even pray for my parents as my heart won't let me. They are in denial every day and wonder why my kids don't want much to do with them. It's true what nouman ali khan says they are scared of their community.
    Marriage is a very good thing as it keeps you away from sin but marriage can be a very bad thing as it puts you right at the heart of sin when it is done for point scoring. May our almighty creator bless people with good and healthy believing spouses that's my dua for all mankind

  • @KC62283
    @KC62283 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for this! Please advocate for these kids

  • @harryy7918
    @harryy7918 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I've been guilt tripped into saying yes for marriage. The girl and the family is good I don't dislike her but I just don't like her. It feels so bad I hate it I pray Allah helps me get out of this🙏🏻

  • @Anonymous-lx6xh
    @Anonymous-lx6xh 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I was forcefully married still am in the situation. My parents are getting old i still struggle to forgive them. It has ruined me psychologically, mentally, physically. The right of me being with someone compatible was taken from me so I cheated viciously. I am still married to him and have three kids with him but I will never love him because it was forced and he wasn't a good man for me. I have been married for 13 years now and it has been so hard. I am trying to be a better person now but its really hard to love with the consequences. May Allah forgive my parents and forgive me too.

    • @mnm-mom
      @mnm-mom ปีที่แล้ว

      Thats my story too. I wonder how can somebody relate dis much😮

  • @proudmuslimah6801
    @proudmuslimah6801 9 ปีที่แล้ว +87

    " If you don't marry this guy then u will get a bad guy and u can't blame us u only blame urself" That's my culture they keep playing with the mind 😭😭😭😭 then the whole family attacks with playing with the mind. "I won't sacrifice their happiness for urs" 😭😭😭😭😳

    • @nadzdanz
      @nadzdanz 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      May I ask where you are from? For example the subcontinent, Middle East or something like that if you don't want to be specific?

    • @proudmuslimah6801
      @proudmuslimah6801 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      +Danz Nadz its ok I don't mind it's Yemen

    • @dailyhadithguy
      @dailyhadithguy 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm sorry to say this but apparently you gotta face them with the truth. Don't let anyone force you to do something you don't want. Unless it's fardh

    • @nadzdanz
      @nadzdanz 9 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Proud Muslimah You can't be forced into marriage by anyone who follows the rules of Islam and you shouldn't be forced by anyone, whether a Muslim or non-Muslim. You could maybe bring your family to an imam at the mosque or someone who is educated in Islam and settle the issue together. Maybe show your family this video. :)
      I really feel for every women that is forced into marriage against their will, that is why I hate my culture. The culture goes against my religion in a few questions and I've decided to take a step away from the culture and only live according to my religion, even if it means I'll have to get into an argument with relatives. I don't want any woman to be forced into marrying me and if I could I would bash some sense into people that force their kids.

    • @nazzyos4598
      @nazzyos4598 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sister, just listen to them. I get the "I'm your parent so why would I want anything bad for you, don't you trust me" and it makes me feel guilty. But hey, I tell them I will chose who I want because in the end like brother Nouman said if you don't like that person, your marriage is invalid, which is then committing zina :/ I'm too scared of Allah to be scared of my parents. Tell them that a parents dua for their child is always accepted, so that they should pray for someone that makes their daughter happy in sha allah. Remember to leave everything in Allah's hands.

  • @coumbandiaye7561
    @coumbandiaye7561 9 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Ruining people's half deen very deep
    May Allah protect us

  • @MegaOhoo
    @MegaOhoo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Salute to Islam and the perfect law Allah (swt) has created for mankind!

  • @senujeje
    @senujeje 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is really amazing, I always enjoy this short sermon/remembrance, it is short and straight to the point. Jazakallahu Khair Brother.

  • @Maryam_Fatimah
    @Maryam_Fatimah หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    As a revert girl in india , it's very very difficult to handle family and all , please make dua for me to not get married to a non muslim at all ameen Allahumma Ameen Ya Rabbal 'Alamin Allahumma Ameen 🤲

  • @ikasyahmi274
    @ikasyahmi274 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    we should make the parents, writers n movie producers that actually made this issue possible understand

  • @drdebbie03
    @drdebbie03 9 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Women are often limited in choices when they choose their education or career. This often brings shame o some families that heir daughters are then too old to be marriageable to the same pool of potential spouses as those who are younger. The sisters in the former group I refer to are man. I know them. They would like to be married InshaAllah, but they hear the message from their families about the consequences of their choosing to pursue advanced studies abroad, for example, as it relates to finding a husband for them. But my sisters don't want their parents to do this, and yet they still present "candidates" to them. I might also say that there is a lot of pressure for men to marry by a certain age, depending on cultural values. Some of my brothers Have been pressured into marrying from a specific family, a cousin, someone not of their choosing. Even someone they despise, like my brother whose dying father requested so. And he fulfilled his promise. Alhamdulilah

  • @mushfiqurrahmananas9920
    @mushfiqurrahmananas9920 9 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    indo-pak-bd parents!!! wish they understood...

    • @rabiakhan720
      @rabiakhan720 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I WISH GOD WOULD NEVER GIFT THEM CHILDEREN.

    • @mehnaztaj172
      @mehnaztaj172 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@rabiakhan720 ameen

  • @zednes2065
    @zednes2065 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    So basically my marriage is 'Baatel'. 🤐🙄

  • @fj9630
    @fj9630 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Alhamdulillah the more I watch that's messed up, the more I realize what gems my parents are. ALHAMDULILLAH.

  • @zaidkhalid3743
    @zaidkhalid3743 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    In our country, people forcefully marry their girls at the ages 19-21 just because of the fake stuff. My question is, how can we stop this? Should we talk to our parents, how?

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Talk and bring your Quran. Also read and understand the quran before you talk to them. Know your riights and know your loyalty to parents doesn't come before your loyalty to Allah.

  • @Zeriun
    @Zeriun 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is why so many non-Muslims get the wrong idea about Islamic marriages thinking that they’re forced... the culture completely diminishes the religious aspect of marriage and how true marriage should be... a happy bond

  • @khattak9376
    @khattak9376 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Honestly been through this for almost four years and every time Allah would save me by having the guys family back off over tiny things, even though I know I was depressed for those years I’m happy that for the first time I’ve finally started to take a stand and say no! No matter what my parents say or do it’s just no

  • @sportsfan7460
    @sportsfan7460 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I am in a similar boat to a lot of the comments. One thing that put me at ease a bit was when I read you are not disobeying your parents if you don't want to marry a person of their choice. In Islam, you should respect your parents but if they are doing something against the teachings of Islam, you are not sinning if you disobey them. Sometimes children feel they are committing sin by not obeying the parents and their choice in partner. Remember this my brothers and sisters who are going through the same struggle.

  • @yesbro3073
    @yesbro3073 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Its totally cultural thing.
    I am engaged to my cousin for the past 2 years and I was told that everything will work out once you get to know each other and get married. But I feel like it won't work as i don't see any interest from her side.
    She doesn't talk to me and neither to my family. I always beg her to talk or text me but she doesn't show any interest. It really disappoints me :(
    We live very far from each other in different countries and going to get married soon.
    But I am always positive and hope for better future

    • @amina993
      @amina993 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I hope u two are happy now same thing happening to me as im engaged to my cousin he tried to call me and texted me but since my parents forced me in this i just cant like nd accept him knowing its not his fault either just our familys

    • @walidahmad2440
      @walidahmad2440 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      i hope you two are happy now , can you tell me about your current life , how is it going?
      @@amina993

  • @TMPD_Official
    @TMPD_Official 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    i love this type of videos. please continue doing them. short and yet so useful

  • @iTheNem3sis
    @iTheNem3sis 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    My eldest step sister came home from work and they bathed her, got her ready and they forced her to get married.

    • @jewelrylover2958
      @jewelrylover2958 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      ★_Vizualize_★ wow! This is so horrible. May Allah help her and every Muslim

    • @faqruddinmd4591
      @faqruddinmd4591 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😢😢

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Why didn't she no at the time of the nikah?

    • @randomhuman4493
      @randomhuman4493 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      rayyan a. It is not easy forced marriage is forced the person gets no choice

  • @machalattes
    @machalattes 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    This series is so cool! Just as beneficial as your other videos, but I think this one got into my head better. Very interesting indeed.

  • @aqsabaloch8755
    @aqsabaloch8755 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    But what if the guy is highly qualified and has a good charachter but you are not sure about marrying him can that proposal be considerable???

  • @aafiyaansari209
    @aafiyaansari209 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I cried while watching this.

    • @inshirahashim4444
      @inshirahashim4444 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too. I couldn't understand why I was crying but it felt like someone actually understood what our own parent's doesn't

    • @aafiyaansari209
      @aafiyaansari209 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@inshirahashim4444 our parents need to understand😞

    • @NisCho754
      @NisCho754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I cried as well especially when I was reading the comments, this issue (emotionally blackmailing your children) is so common that it makes me scared when I think about how many parents have to answer Allah in on the day of judgement...May Allah guide our parents and help the children in need Ameen.

  • @786Tanzil
    @786Tanzil 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Wow.! mashallah.!! Long live Ustad.! May Allah bless you .!

  • @famousfolks7074
    @famousfolks7074 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am also going through this in the hands of my father

    • @MustaWizard
      @MustaWizard 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      nimra habib i did dua for you so Allah can help you with your situation. Such a disgusting world we live in.

  • @ShoroukA
    @ShoroukA 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    An amazing idea!! Great message! Jazakom Allah khair!

  • @arminass1681
    @arminass1681 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    bless the invention of internet and youtube ( to use for good ) I needed this.

  • @HishSwish
    @HishSwish 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    If the marriage is illegitimate (when it's forced), and the pair engage in intimacy, is that zinnah?

    • @Riyaanreality
      @Riyaanreality 9 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Good question. I would also love to know the answer to this question. I would think that if any sin comes from such marriage, then wouldn't it be the sin of those who forced them to marry in the first place? If any sin comes from the marriage, then I would think the parents would carry the sin. For example, if someone is raped, the victim didn't commit Zinah, but the rapist did. This is just my opinion, but Allahu a'lam.

    • @Nomad314
      @Nomad314 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think their intentions would be important e.g. If the guy knew it's not right but wanted to have intimacy now since he is married and it would seem to be allowed then he engages in that, but his intention is in the wrong place, so it is sin. Or if they did not know it's an illegitimate marriage, and maybe thought they have to do that, then again the intention is important, so it would not be sin. I hope that makes sense. Anyway that is just my opinion. It's a good question.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Its called raape hand it's forrced, not intiimacy. If you are married under durress/forrce, then how the heck or why would you be intiimate? Unless you're ok with the person your married? People who are forrcibly married do not engage in intiimacy but yes it's not uncommmon for the "husband" to raape the "wiife" . Intiimacy means conssentual intrecoruse while raape means nonconssentual intrecoruse.
      Is it zinnah? I don't know. It would be zinnah bil jabr though.

  • @thebachu786
    @thebachu786 9 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    the classic divide between religion and culture. people born unto a selfish culture have to deal with this type of oppression. In this day and age, if you are forced into a marriage, it won't last and you'll end up with a divorce. Maybe its Allah's way of teaching your selfish parents a lesson. Divorce is happening everywhere. Its time to say no to oppressive cultures all around the world!
    This is especially hard on women because there are less and less real men to choose from. Its painful to marry a boy in a man's body. Our Prophet (SAW) warned us about this in end times when he said there will be ONE man for every 50 women! People can take this literally or metaphorically (in which case it makes sooo much sense in a modern western trendy hipster society). Guys spend more time on their hair than learning to be a man.

    • @fatmefateemy7000
      @fatmefateemy7000 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +thebachu786 in islam or culture, you still have a right to say no. Don't be fooled by anyone. The prophet(pbup) loved his wives so much and was never embarrassed to show it.

    • @thebachu786
      @thebachu786 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      +fatme fateemy I think the point here is that in Islam and most cultures , yes you have the right to say no. But the problem is of oppression, and those that use twisted interpretations of their culture for selfish gains.

    • @fatmefateemy7000
      @fatmefateemy7000 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      culture, which is man made and regional verses religion is the problem here. Yes, the people need to understand that Islam is a religion of peace and once they understand that then this cultural may stop. However, all religions are the same, I mean if they are orthodox, no difference. Unfortunately, the power of money, has more of an influence..sadly.

  • @marium2815
    @marium2815 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Am crying while watching this

  • @tazkianur9071
    @tazkianur9071 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    MashaAllah beautiful talk 👌 I wish my parents could understand all that... May Allah give all parents a greater understanding.

  • @sufyaanahmed5818
    @sufyaanahmed5818 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is all sadly so true. Parents want to force their children to marry someone just to look good on society. They also fear if their child does not marry a specific person, that persons family will not talk to them or like them. It's as if the child does not have a choice who they can marry. May Allah make it easy for those who are looking for a spouse

  • @marceewinthrop8731
    @marceewinthrop8731 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It is happening to sons too. I am in love with a 24 yr old man who is being pressured/forced by his parents to marry a girl from his village in Pakistan instead of me...an American Muslim they have not met. He tells me that he wants me to be his 2nd wife if he marries to this village girl for his parents. He says he doesn't want to marry her....only for his parent's sake.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Please cut him out life. If he isnt man enough to take a stand and make you his wife now then it has no future. Wanting to make you his second wife is not really a compliiment. Think what else he migh out you thru for the swke of pleasing his parents. Divorce or abanndonment? There are decent Muslim men who will be happy to make you their first and only wife and treat you like a queen and not be contrrolled by their parents and cullture. Its called being a man.

  • @TheTwisterWEB
    @TheTwisterWEB 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you very much for making this show, it brings up topics that all muslims and non muslims around the world should know about. May allah bless you and your co-workers for making this show for us.

  • @AmeerulIslam
    @AmeerulIslam 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Brothers I noticed there is an issue with the sound in Bayyinah videos, It hits the ears bad. :(
    I hope you guys address this issue.

  • @talhamuneer2599
    @talhamuneer2599 9 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    BEAUTIFUL!!! That's Real ISLAM!
    Brother Nouman Please Make A Video On Intimacy Rights Of Women In Islam. You Know Husbands Kinda Force That If You Don't Do It, You Will Be Cursed By Angels.

  • @naheedakhtar1982
    @naheedakhtar1982 9 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    very serious topic been through this now someone I know is also going through this. emotional blackmale like if u leave her or him then ur father will divorce me. etc they make u promises and in the end u with someone who is not comparable mkes u sad/ beats u and u know wht ur parents are no longer their to protect u or be their for u. sad thing is the your older brother does this to you because to please his wife.
    I leave my case with allah

    • @syeddawood566
      @syeddawood566 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      May Allah protect you and make it easy for you !

    • @naheedakhtar1982
      @naheedakhtar1982 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      +Syed Dawood ameen :)

    • @marwaamoradi4979
      @marwaamoradi4979 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Naheed Akhtar may Allah give u sabare jameel

  • @intvisa1
    @intvisa1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I wish my mom can listen this ❤️

  • @sabrinaaboobacker
    @sabrinaaboobacker 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    #thatsmessedup! Marriage has to be from the permission of a girl not a reluctant one :) but what happens is the culture ,pride ,prestige is what makes them do this . What ppl r gonna say ...if your stay like this .Your the reason the younger one can't marry and what not ..Y thinking too much just be there for her ,dun push her to take decisions out of pressure ,because even the worse you have to see dear parents if u neglect her word.Every child understands the pain of parents though they may seem irresponsibile or painless to u ,all they have is only you (parents) whom they trust more than any individual.If you find her as a burden and pressurize her, her trust in you starts fading way ,she keeps blaming herself for everything . May Allah help and guide us all.Aameen

  • @FahimAhmed-xj9lq
    @FahimAhmed-xj9lq 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The same should apply for men, except that they cant force a girl to marry them.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well men can't forrce awoman to marry them. This is cllearly written in the Quran. Read the Quran and you will find many answers. All sorts of forrce is haram in islam.

  • @reformandpurify4873
    @reformandpurify4873 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Quran An-Nisa' 4:19 (en-saheeh)
    يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمْ أَن تَرِثُوا۟ ٱلنِّسَآءَ كَرْهًاۖ وَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ لِتَذْهَبُوا۟ بِبَعْضِ مَآ ءَاتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ إِلَّآ أَن يَأْتِينَ بِفَٰحِشَةٍ مُّبَيِّنَةٍۚ وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِٱلْمَعْرُوفِۚ فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَىٰٓ أَن تَكْرَهُوا۟ شَيْـًٔا وَيَجْعَلَ ٱللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًا
    O you who have believed, it is not lawful for you to inherit women by compulsion. And do not make difficulties for them in order to take [back] part of what you gave them unless they commit a clear immorality. And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.
    Quran Al-Baqarah 2:256 (en-saheeh)
    لَآ إِكْرَاهَ فِى ٱلدِّينِۖ قَد تَّبَيَّنَ ٱلرُّشْدُ مِنَ ٱلْغَىِّۚ فَمَن يَكْفُرْ بِٱلطَّٰغُوتِ وَيُؤْمِنۢ بِٱللَّهِ فَقَدِ ٱسْتَمْسَكَ بِٱلْعُرْوَةِ ٱلْوُثْقَىٰ لَا ٱنفِصَامَ لَهَاۗ وَٱللَّهُ سَمِيعٌ عَلِيمٌ
    There shall be no compulsion in [acceptance of] the religion. The right course has become clear from the wrong. So whoever disbelieves in Taghut and believes in Allah has grasped the most trustworthy handhold with no break in it. And Allah is Hearing and Knowing.
    get Quran App:
    goo.gl/w6rESk

  • @sabahkhan7915
    @sabahkhan7915 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    No matter how educated our society gets they will always put culture before religion. I have pity upon those people who care more about what people think than what allah thinks of them. Girls in our society should speak up and not be afraid of standing up for their rights.

  • @nashearehman2142
    @nashearehman2142 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I am stuck with this... Fighting this war for 3 to 4 years now

  • @aryaa3998
    @aryaa3998 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    Alhamdulillah for this video, addresses a very serious issue. The only problem with my parents is they want me to select someone within my race. I just realised they want it for their own sake.

  • @adnanshariff3735
    @adnanshariff3735 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My gf of 6 years is being focused to marry someone else... We are both in school and we had plans to get married after we were done... I met her mom and she was ok with us dating. she India and I'm Somali... My gf told me that they're are focusing her into the marriage and I couldn't ever marry her bc I'm not India.. We are both Muslim and I thought that should be the olny thing that matters when it comes to marriage.... Please pray for us and please pray for her. It's really heart breaking to see this.

  • @ayhamshaheed7740
    @ayhamshaheed7740 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is a great video, which many people need to here, including both the parents it talks about, and people that are against Islam, who believe forcing children to marry is encouraged, which is of course not true.

  • @rummaankhurshid7625
    @rummaankhurshid7625 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for spreading bliss & enlightenment! Thank you for separating islam from culture! Allah bless you all

  • @SpreadDawaProductions
    @SpreadDawaProductions 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jazzakum Allahu Khayran

  • @CatsandAnimals213
    @CatsandAnimals213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am being forced into one, mentally tortured that i am terrified of whay will happen to me if i dont get married here. I dont know what will.happen still praying to Allah, waiting for a miracle, whatever happens, i may not become such a parent to my children in shs Allah. They will be extremely happy when they are about to get married, unlike me, in sha Allah. ❤

  • @zaidislam6707
    @zaidislam6707 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It’s a weird paradox:
    “Don’t Like the person you are going to marry others wise it’s haram.”
    But you also say
    “Parents should let children like who they marry it should be a choice for them.”
    So which is it?

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hmmm...the messsengers firrst wife liked him enough to send off a proposal so I don't know why some people think natural feelings attractions, love, liike are bad things. I think it's a culltural thing

  • @shahnawazalam9184
    @shahnawazalam9184 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    May Allah bless you Ustad Noumaan Ali Khan. I Love this channel.

  • @quranmalayalam4dailylife
    @quranmalayalam4dailylife 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Maasha Allah.... brother....Nauman u r in my prayers bro....Allah knows...u r my guru...my usthad

  • @zamshaim
    @zamshaim ปีที่แล้ว

    Got forced to get married…8 years 2 kids later I got separated…initially there were red flags ..I was told he will change no worries…I tolerated physical mental and financial abuses…now I am Alhamdulillah happy with my kids living my own life 2 years later

  • @themovieraider1028
    @themovieraider1028 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Im proud that i got this man to my house back in '14.

  • @zarmeenakhan7049
    @zarmeenakhan7049 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    yes this is an issue that parents dont understand,their only priority is their family and their pride.they dont look for their daugter's happiness

  • @otakoob
    @otakoob 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    we need more of this kind of muslim philosopher who has rational thinking, grounded to the reality and care for people mentally and physically well being.

  • @syedabarirahhasan5600
    @syedabarirahhasan5600 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    love listening to u sir....u r simply amazing...May Allah forgive our sins n guide all of us

  • @bellanabila2818
    @bellanabila2818 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I hope my parents and my family watch this video 😢😢

  • @syeddawood566
    @syeddawood566 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    May Allah give us wisdom and protect us !

  • @مریمپوپلزای
    @مریمپوپلزای 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    سلام وعلیکمbrother ali .you have very good programs may allah give you اجر.

  • @muhammadabdullah705
    @muhammadabdullah705 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Beautiful and strong message by brother nouman but i got shocked when heard piano (i guess) music at the end ! why music if we got inspired by your lecture and trying hard to stay away from music ?

  • @kgaming8082
    @kgaming8082 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know a girl who is my neighbor who commited suicide because she was forced to marry a man she doesnt like

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Mohammed Barwani sucidr is not an option. It is the last desperate respect of somebody who has no options. As a male so you can't possibly understand, how it is for a female, who is forrcibly married off without her conssent and against her will, and what she will go through living with a man, who will expect sxx and how she will be raaped for the rest of her life trapped in a marriage, she never wanted in the fiirst place.

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Mohammed Barwani ok. But you still don't understand suiicide and keep thinking of it as a solution. Kindly read about suiicide and its psycholgy. Its a desprate way out of a miiserable situation. You just can't judge sombodys triials and triibulations.

  • @zooneyl2248
    @zooneyl2248 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you

  • @sarah-bm1zl
    @sarah-bm1zl 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Pls upload with increased volume. JazakAllah khair

  • @zzgamingyt7228
    @zzgamingyt7228 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hi guys, you should re upload this vid. The audio is only on the left.

  • @Sami-gn3sm
    @Sami-gn3sm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Ustad.. please clarify, here many people have misconceptions thinking we can marry outside our religion 🙄🙄..that's totally wrong according Quran (Surah baqra verse 221 I think)

    • @rayyana.8538
      @rayyana.8538 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Did you actually read and understand the verse? It speaks of not marrying polytheistic women. Do you know what polytheism means? Can you also explain why the prophet married Jeewish and Chriistian women without converting them?

  • @allurem1707
    @allurem1707 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Going through exactly same position