We're out of sight, out of mind until they run out of the good supply...then they return to refuel. Always remember...IT'S ALWAYS ONLY ABOUT THEM, ALL THE TIME
TOOK ME SOOO LONG TO UNDERSTAND THIS CONCEPT!!! When they fill up their tank again, back to the BS!!! I went thru this cycle for years! I thought him coming back meant he truly loved me and he said all the right things, so I thought he finally got it! But then the discard kept happening over and over. I finally said to myself "This can't be love. Someone that loves me would respect me. This isn't showing respect if you keep coming in and out of my life like this" And I just started to study the disorder and it all made sense. When he's at his lowest and comes back being fake nice and ready to make things right, it's because something in his life is failing. Once he feels empowered, he goes right back to the jerk he really is. I see it for what it is now, nothing more and nothing less.
She’d always say to me: “they always come back” about exes in her past, implying that she was so sought after. I swore to myself I’d never let her say this about me, so when I was discarded/ghosted/ignored without initial explanation and finally had my first moment of clarity with regards to who/what she is, I went no contact and stayed it. Never would I have imagined that her ego would allow her to text me 6 months and 5 days post-discard (this was only 8 days ago!), asking me if I’d left flowers/gifts at her front door while simultaneously “hoping” I was well and had spent a nice Christmas. That was my reminder that her number needed to be blocked asap, which has now been done. Absolutely pathetic.
It's "funny" many that say that say it because they've only been with other narcissists; that of course NEED them, or ANY supply, back/ASAP desperately. 😂
The flower scam, was her sending it to herself. But she could now use it to triangulate, create fake sence of demand ofter her. And a fake pretence to call ( they are cowards). It’s like kicking a drug/alcohol/nicotin addiction. When we are out of the FOG, we see the insanity of the narcissist clearly Good work on sticking to « no contact» 👍📈.
Hell yea brother. I blocked mine and will never, fucking ever give her the satisfaction of hearing my voice again. That’s the only way you can possibly hurt their ego.
Joe this video just empowered me more than ever not to EVER break the No contact. I had never thought giving a helping hand to someone in distress will throw me into this toxic mess. I reached the point of losing my identity and doubting my sanity. I never knew there were people like this out there. USERS AND ABUSERS they are. I am building the most ever strong boundaries to protect myself from now on. Thanks for leading our path in this emotionally devastating journey!
Yeah I feel the same! He stole my whole identity. Its sick. Theese people are not human! Even my self esteem he ran away with😳 they are thieves😲 what ever happens to him I will not let him in! Even if noone else wants me. I dont care about that! I just want my high energy back and continue manifesting good things that are not unhealthy relationships that I experienced with this creature. I do forgive though. He is in my past. He can continue build up his karma for sure! I do believe God is giving him karma just when he is not expecting it! And when he would ever need me I will NEVER be there. I will be long gone
If they are young and have a lot of options, they will likely not return and just forget you. You’ll be better of this way…live your best life and forget them too.
These people are completely insane. I was married to a covert malignant narcissist for 23 years before I woke up and realised what I was dealing with and had been through this cycle constantly. After I woke up and left, tried my best to go no contact including getting a restraining order. 3 years later and he still reaches out but in very sneaky covert ways that I can’t prove is him. It only took 11 days to get a a full Hoover after leaving. He got arrested for stalking for that one. For the first 18 months after I left he would tell our son on the rare occasion of seeing him that him and the new supply are no longer together while they were living together. It’s just so crazy. They truly live in a delusional world.
I was discarded a month ago today. She didn't block me anywhere. She usually Hoovers on day 10. Very cyclical - not this time. Her friend spotted me out on a date a week ago & I didn't have very many nice things to say. The definition of a Narcissist. She dumps me... I go on a date 3 weeks later. She's furious like I cheated on her. Makes no sense.
I was discarded for the 3rd and final time almost a year ago by a covert narcissist. it still hurts to think about it from time to time but I am doing much better. I wish I hadn't fallen for their lies and manipulations
3 and a half years later my covert popped back up just like nothing had happened, they seem to know when you are doing well, and that is where the cognitive dissonance happens to get you back on the wash, rinse, repeat cycle again, please stay strong
It is as real as real , can be Ladies & Gentlemen. I was 26yrs with a toxic woman. I saw 2 psychiatrists and 1 psychologist they were 2 ladies and a guy. If you need therapy, find it. It will help. Educate yourselves and grab the horns of wisdom and don't let go. God be with everyone. Servando Navia Jr. Hernandez
Nope! forget the psychologists and psychiatrist!! Your best bet is to seek God out and give yourself totally to him 100%, and believe me all this trauma will go away including the demonically possessed Narcissist! 👿.... Demons can't handle the sight of God's holy spirit (✝️) in a person.
5 hoovers in one year. I had the wherewithal to snap her picture twice, standing right at my door. I asked her, 'wtf do you think the people who you've been smearing my name to are going to think when they see you coming to my house!?...If I'm such an asshole why the fu(k are you even here.' '
It would be comical if it weren’t so frightening. The absolute and complete lack of foresight. They’re so hung up on control and revenge that they scare off the very people they’ll need to help them once withdrawal kicks in. My exes workaround was to have the police show up. On Christmas day.
My last girlfriend told me I’ve been her most abusive partner. A few weeks later, she invites me to a private Facebook group I didn’t know about that consists of all our mutual friends. She wanted to know that I wasn’t mad at her, and that she’s not mad at me. Sad that she’s worried about that. What good am I to her after she treated me so poorly both emotionally and physically? Within days, we’re in a heated text dialogue that affords her the opportunity to tell me how much better her new boyfriend is than me. But none of our conversation ventured remotely close to his name, which I was careful to avoid -I know how I’ll look as jealous and competitive. I know her new boyfriend is no match for me. He’s extremely lazy and passive and highly respects me, more than her, and is afraid of losing his bond with me. I knew exactly what she was trying to do. She was trying to cut deep because I told him she came back to me after dumping me once and I wouldn’t try again with her. She hated knowing I made a statement that implied I was in control over her. She had to impose a petty counterattack on me, even if it really didn’t do her any good. She acts like she’s doing people in her network a favor, especially her partner. Wonder what she’d do if her current boyfriend left. I know what she did last time. Narcissists are middle school drama queens that never grew up.
I’ve been experiencing the holiday hoovers from him, texts and phone calls from other numbers, leaving messages. Wondering why I won’t take his calls or return his texts because he knows the holidays are my favorite and he’s just calling to wish me well…SAY WHAT? He made every holiday I spent with him a living hell! Good thing I could give two beeps🤣 at this point, I have no idea how I stayed with that man and I am so grateful to be rid of him!
I have just been following out of sight. Out of mind. TY.. ❤. Radical Acceptance .. 💪👏.. there concept of time is ludicrous...sleeping habits are utterly ridiculous.....amazing when you ARE out of the Fog they PLACE you in. That HEAVINESS is lifted. These creatures ARE unique for lack of a better word. . ...so damn confusing. NPD/BPD......oh boy you hit the nail on the head with that ending. There is absolutely no middle ground with these people. ..0. None.....
Some people hold the philosophy of a universal mind, perhaps helping us in this journey, the human experience, to learn lessons. Just a way to look at life.
I loved her, I adored her, I worshiped her.... Over time she began to push me away, and push me away. Eventually, I ended the relationship.. maybe it was a reverse discard. Before she left, she knew she went too far and she tried to give me a love bomb... I rejected the love bomb which sent her into a rage unlike any I'd seen before.. It sounded like she was tearing the house apart, but I did not react. I sat stoically knowing she'd be gone in a day, and I would fix whatever damage she was doing to my home. MY home- she had no job, no income. Turned out she did no damage she merely wanted me to think she was breaking stuff so I would come running to stop her. That's what she wanted me to do, but I sat quietly downstairs... no reaction at all. She came stomping downstairs and said "I want to leave!" She went outside to have a cigarette (I hated that she smoked) before she could finish her smoke she had a text message with a ticket for the first train out the next morning- destination to where her daughter lives. I was the best supply she ever had and the best she'll ever have. She blocked me before I knew about the blocking/unblock game. She focused on getting new supply because if she did have supply lined up, he backed out.... probably married future-faking her about leaving his wife until that day came and he backed out. So she was left alone- even her daughter wouldn't take her in. She dropped her mom off at an extended stay motel. She finally got new supply, but he is weak-sauce. He doesn't make enough money to provide the lifestyle she is accustomed to... but he is safe mediocre supply, she probably thought he'd never leave her like she thought I'd never leave. (I hung in for 11 years until the abuse came daily with few love bombs nearly no affection in between.) I didn't come chasing her- I let her go. At some point 8 months later she liked a couple posts I wrote on mutual friends walls... that was how I learned she unblocked me. I ignored it. A couple weeks later (when I didn't respond.. when I didn't block her, I guess she thought the coast was clear and I would be receptive.) she tried to video call me in the middle of a week night. Maybe that was an accident. I was asleep and didn't answer. She messaged me immediately after the unanswered call asking to see the dogs- I imaging her current supply was sleeping soundly right next to her as she was trying to reconnect with me, perhaps she was in another room. I did not reply. Later that day she asked again to send pictures of the dogs. I replied, "You have photos of the dogs. Look at the photos you already have." And then I blocked her. That must have caused a narcissistic injury that sent her reeling to the mat. I have not unblocked her since that day. A few months later, a mutual friend contacted me with some nonsensical horse crap.. "havent talked to you in a while.." and after a few lines of idle chit-chat she made her intention clear.. she asked how the narc is doing, and if I still talk to her. I simply replied "I haven't spoken with her in more than a year. I wish her the best from afar." So once again, her hoover attempt was swatted down. I don't want to know anything about her, but I heard that she's moving somewhere. I guess that means things didn't work out with the current supply, so I expect she might soon try to reach out to me again. I almost want her to try again so I can reject her again. I want her to feel rejected like the way she rejected me, over and over and over for the course of those 11 wasted years. She deserves that pain, she earned it. I ain't ever taking her back, not in a million years! I didn't know at the time of the breakup what a narcissist is... I thought it was a person who liked to admire themselves in the mirror (which she does... and posting 10 selfies to social media per day, desperate for people to like her photos.) Only since I started healing did I see how she abused me... flirting with guys right in front of my face... probably cheated on me, if not physically she was not emotionally faithful, triangulation, gaslighting, silent treatment, manipulation, provoking arguments out of nowhere... I ignored those provocations for 45 minutes- she was incessant.. when I couldn't bear it any more I raised my voice.. not yell... just raised my voice. She accused me of yelling at her and call me monster- this happened often. That's what she needed to regulate her emotions. Total projection... she is the monster. She destroys relationships with everyone misfortunate to fall in love with her, or even care for her, including her daughter. She is an empty vessel, she has no heart, no empathy, no compassion, and no love. She is intensely cruel. I hope she gets what she deserves.
She rearranged the living room cuz she wanted your weenie boy or arshole REACTION. Which she didn't get she saw your strength. Then wanted you more cuz your strong. It's one of the traits she wants from you
My narc blocked me during a normal conversation just before Christmas - after two years of me giving everything I possibly could to her. Absolutely no change in her behavior or communication, and within a split second - gone. Here we are six months later, she sends me a text saying "lol Spain 🇪🇸" at the full-time whistle after England lost the Euros final. I ran to Telegram as soon as I saw the text, but I'd already been reblocked within a matter of seconds. Literally never did anything to them, and here they are trying to hurt me and expecting me to feel anger due to the fact I can't even confront her on her message. Unfortunately for her, I met somebody else who treats me like an actual human being. 😅
Oh, a just for some added juicy gossip - I dated another narc before her. This narc was LDR, would visit me for vacations over the years but would always hold back on me emigrating so we could actually begin to experience real domestic life and not a 2 week vacation visit where the hardships of life are never present. Kept me LDR for almost a decade, then age 26 she leaves me for a predator in his 60s who'd literally groomed her. Like, techniques you'd expect to work on a child. She was just so desperate got an easier supply, and he was there. Happened on the film set for Umbrella Academy, they found out that their most senior employee had been having sex with their most inexperienced female employee (first time working on a film set, been there months and he risked her career even though apparently he loved her for who she was and not her age lol) and anyway, both were fired simultaneously but the given reason wasn't related to any of the grooming or sex. They covered it up. Dude got rehired at another studio and was free to prey upon another young female. Tried to help her, spent months having to hear all the traumatic details of his relationship with her - but somehow, to this day she still thinks I'm the terrible human being. Ugh, narcs.
fantastic...came at a weird time cuz a friend who lived by my ex who he does not know contacted me out of the blue...does your ex live at blank blank street...i said yes why she said i just walked past him and he looks like shit....i started laughing because that day i said im pretty much healed and feeling happy again and now i am going to start getting little breadcrumbs of vindication....and there it was
@@ladyvirgo013 yeah but he posted pictures on fb beeing in thailand. I caught him having chat apps on his phone when with him and it seemed like he worked hard to keep up with the supplies, I mean its easy now with all social media with people. Ive gone off all social media except some videoes on my youtube, working on my self alot. Writing recipes, slowly exercising more, eating more and more healthy, doing things that please me , gonna start singing/dancing in my apartment soon too. I have had a break in it but gonna make videoes. Have worked on fasting but have been soooo hungry since he discarded me the last time in the end of october. But I will get there slowly! We went back and fortj both of us discarding eachother haha🤷🏼♀️ a totally crazy situationship if you ask me! I wanna become my best version so I can attract my dream man one day😃 I know he is out there😍 but I have no hurry, he will appear when the time is right. Im sure of it
Just when I truly been feeling good and doing good, The Ex-Narcissist is starting to frequent my workplace. It's been more than a year since first & final discard. It's weird and caught me off guard. Is he watchihg me? Its stalking. Is that a hoover when they come to your job, right and many times? All I want is to be left alone and would NEVER go back to Ex-Narcissist. I may need to leave my job, sooner than later...
Love that you made two videos for us today ! 👍👍👍 and they both just prefect as always, beautiful images of the nature. Thank you Joe ! ❤🤗 logically next one should be called '' Why the narcissist never returns😊'' 15.9K 😯👋👋👋
There is a similar saying (out of sight, out of mind) in Spanish: "Corazon que no ve, corazon que no siente." If you hear someone tell you that in a way that indicates they believe in that, run.
I dont think mine will ever return cause I told him I do not have contact with exes. So when he discarded me I blocked him. They can even be dangerous! Im staying away! I told him no to both marry him and said no to not move with him
@@templemanning6180 he has moved on. Got involved before our divorce was final. They just moved in together. Replaced me, my kids w another woman and her kids. Everything he does is very calculated and controlling. He won't come back because I hold him accountable for his horrible behavior
Every narc is different. Not all of them come back, but some do ritualisticly..but I do know like you, from experience, that if you hold them accountable, they can't handle it, it's a narcissistic bruise to their ego and they can't fully come back from it and now see us as the enemy
What a fucking waste of life lmao I feel so much weight lifted n feel a new future n I can still bawl my eyes out but it feels better than six months ago
Hoover 3... Now I'm not even replying. He's just asking me for help and advice lol Clearly thinks I'm stupid but wants me to think he respects my opinions Like I'd give help after the horrible devalue and discard... Goodbye sir Thank you joe
I may also be, the case, that if they are comorbid with borderline and NPD they might not come back and that will be because of the borderline part. I hear that when a borderline is done, they are done.
Your videos are awesome. Can you make some on narcissist wives who use kids as pawns especially in legal battles and mediations. Also how to tackle a narcissist partner with kids in married life?/ Thanks in advance.
I love your other channel! Yes, keep it going! The various topics, pictures, and humor are awesome! I like the "Hitch Hiker" one I rmr. Appreciate You, Joe! ❤❤❤😌💯
Situationsships work if u have a no care attitude , u can appreciate someone from a distance, living with someone is completely different. No closure is fine with me.
But who wants a type a guy that would do that to begin with???? 🤢 Sounds toxic! Alex! please tell me that there are still men out there that don’t think like that!!!
Oh Joe, I have one who I told to bug off, found a new supply, got married, still the guy when he finds out where I worked called me at work, came to my work places (saw him a couple times) sure there were other times. We're talking 25 years. Never out of mind dude. Your theory is wrong.
Ya my xnarc now has lung cancer. I texted him saying..."Stop trying to die. I told you God isnt finished yet with You. Maybe you should ask God why and when you do....be very quiet and listen". I'm a sigma empath....that was the best I could say to him. He is using his "cancer" as a sheild. Poor victim. Doesnt need to make ammends cause he has cancer now. What a joke.
We're out of sight, out of mind until they run out of the good supply...then they return to refuel. Always remember...IT'S ALWAYS ONLY ABOUT THEM, ALL THE TIME
I found out the hard way. Discarded a few days after hoover.
TOOK ME SOOO LONG TO UNDERSTAND THIS CONCEPT!!! When they fill up their tank again, back to the BS!!! I went thru this cycle for years! I thought him coming back meant he truly loved me and he said all the right things, so I thought he finally got it! But then the discard kept happening over and over. I finally said to myself "This can't be love. Someone that loves me would respect me. This isn't showing respect if you keep coming in and out of my life like this" And I just started to study the disorder and it all made sense. When he's at his lowest and comes back being fake nice and ready to make things right, it's because something in his life is failing. Once he feels empowered, he goes right back to the jerk he really is. I see it for what it is now, nothing more and nothing less.
@@inspiredbydior5447 it is so damn sad ..I am being ghosted 3rd time, 8th week ...I do not want him back this time 😢
She’d always say to me: “they always come back” about exes in her past, implying that she was so sought after. I swore to myself I’d never let her say this about me, so when I was discarded/ghosted/ignored without initial explanation and finally had my first moment of clarity with regards to who/what she is, I went no contact and stayed it. Never would I have imagined that her ego would allow her to text me 6 months and 5 days post-discard (this was only 8 days ago!), asking me if I’d left flowers/gifts at her front door while simultaneously “hoping” I was well and had spent a nice Christmas. That was my reminder that her number needed to be blocked asap, which has now been done. Absolutely pathetic.
Absolutely pathetic…
It's "funny" many that say that say it because they've only been with other narcissists; that of course NEED them, or ANY supply, back/ASAP desperately. 😂
The flower scam, was her sending it to herself. But she could now use it to triangulate, create fake sence of demand ofter her. And a fake pretence to call ( they are cowards).
It’s like kicking a drug/alcohol/nicotin addiction. When we are out of the FOG, we see the insanity of the narcissist clearly
Good work on sticking to « no contact» 👍📈.
Hell yea brother. I blocked mine and will never, fucking ever give her the satisfaction of hearing my voice again.
That’s the only way you can possibly hurt their ego.
When u realise there are no ppl asking them out or sending gifts its all just psychological scams it makes u realise how desperate they truly are
when things start going south for them is usually when things start going well for you......brilliant
Joe this video just empowered me more than ever not to EVER break the No contact. I had never thought giving a helping hand to someone in distress will throw me into this toxic mess. I reached the point of losing my identity and doubting my sanity. I never knew there were people like this out there. USERS AND ABUSERS they are. I am building the most ever strong boundaries to protect myself from now on. Thanks for leading our path in this emotionally devastating journey!
Stay strong, Sis. You're worth more than someone's entertainment.
Yeah I feel the same! He stole my whole identity. Its sick. Theese people are not human! Even my self esteem he ran away with😳 they are thieves😲 what ever happens to him I will not let him in! Even if noone else wants me. I dont care about that! I just want my high energy back and continue manifesting good things that are not unhealthy relationships that I experienced with this creature. I do forgive though. He is in my past. He can continue build up his karma for sure! I do believe God is giving him karma just when he is not expecting it! And when he would ever need me I will NEVER be there. I will be long gone
If they are young and have a lot of options, they will likely not return and just forget you. You’ll be better of this way…live your best life and forget them too.
These people are completely insane. I was married to a covert malignant narcissist for 23 years before I woke up and realised what I was dealing with and had been through this cycle constantly.
After I woke up and left, tried my best to go no contact including getting a restraining order. 3 years later and he still reaches out but in very sneaky covert ways that I can’t prove is him.
It only took 11 days to get a a full Hoover after leaving. He got arrested for stalking for that one. For the first 18 months after I left he would tell our son on the rare occasion of seeing him that him and the new supply are no longer together while they were living together. It’s just so crazy. They truly live in a delusional world.
I was discarded a month ago today. She didn't block me anywhere. She usually Hoovers on day 10. Very cyclical - not this time.
Her friend spotted me out on a date a week ago & I didn't have very many nice things to say.
The definition of a Narcissist. She dumps me... I go on a date 3 weeks later. She's furious like I cheated on her. Makes no sense.
I was discarded for the 3rd and final time almost a year ago by a covert narcissist. it still hurts to think about it from time to time but I am doing much better. I wish I hadn't fallen for their lies and manipulations
Watch out, they'll still come back.
3 and a half years later my covert popped back up just like nothing had happened, they seem to know when you are doing well, and that is where the cognitive dissonance happens to get you back on the wash, rinse, repeat cycle again, please stay strong
It is as real as real , can be Ladies & Gentlemen. I was 26yrs with a toxic woman. I saw 2 psychiatrists and 1 psychologist they were 2 ladies and a guy. If you need therapy, find it. It will help. Educate yourselves and grab the horns of wisdom and don't let go. God be with everyone.
Servando Navia Jr. Hernandez
Nope! forget the psychologists and psychiatrist!! Your best bet is to seek God out and give yourself totally to him 100%, and believe me all this trauma will go away including the demonically possessed Narcissist! 👿.... Demons can't handle the sight of God's holy spirit (✝️) in a person.
5 hoovers in one year. I had the wherewithal to snap her picture twice, standing right at my door.
I asked her, 'wtf do you think the people who you've been smearing my name to are going to think when they see you coming to my house!?...If I'm such an asshole why the fu(k are you even here.' '
It would be comical if it weren’t so frightening. The absolute and complete lack of foresight. They’re so hung up on control and revenge that they scare off the very people they’ll need to help them once withdrawal kicks in. My exes workaround was to have the police show up. On Christmas day.
“If I’m such an asshole why tf are you even here?” Exactly…
Yep, almost exactly the same here. SMH!!🤷♂️
My last girlfriend told me I’ve been her most abusive partner. A few weeks later, she invites me to a private Facebook group I didn’t know about that consists of all our mutual friends. She wanted to know that I wasn’t mad at her, and that she’s not mad at me. Sad that she’s worried about that. What good am I to her after she treated me so poorly both emotionally and physically? Within days, we’re in a heated text dialogue that affords her the opportunity to tell me how much better her new boyfriend is than me. But none of our conversation ventured remotely close to his name, which I was careful to avoid -I know how I’ll look as jealous and competitive. I know her new boyfriend is no match for me. He’s extremely lazy and passive and highly respects me, more than her, and is afraid of losing his bond with me. I knew exactly what she was trying to do. She was trying to cut deep because I told him she came back to me after dumping me once and I wouldn’t try again with her. She hated knowing I made a statement that implied I was in control over her. She had to impose a petty counterattack on me, even if it really didn’t do her any good. She acts like she’s doing people in her network a favor, especially her partner. Wonder what she’d do if her current boyfriend left. I know what she did last time. Narcissists are middle school drama queens that never grew up.
I’ve been experiencing the holiday hoovers from him, texts and phone calls from other numbers, leaving messages. Wondering why I won’t take his calls or return his texts because he knows the holidays are my favorite and he’s just calling to wish me well…SAY WHAT? He made every holiday I spent with him a living hell! Good thing I could give two beeps🤣 at this point, I have no idea how I stayed with that man and I am so grateful to be rid of him!
Thank you Joe🌹
I have just been following out of sight. Out of mind. TY.. ❤. Radical Acceptance .. 💪👏.. there concept of time is ludicrous...sleeping habits are utterly ridiculous.....amazing when you ARE out of the Fog they PLACE you in. That HEAVINESS is lifted. These creatures ARE unique for lack of a better word. . ...so damn confusing. NPD/BPD......oh boy you hit the nail on the head with that ending. There is absolutely no middle ground with these people. ..0. None.....
"...but God,"
Destiny has nothing to do with it.
God bless.
Some people hold the philosophy of a universal mind, perhaps helping us in this journey, the human experience, to learn lessons. Just a way to look at life.
I loved her, I adored her, I worshiped her.... Over time she began to push me away, and push me away. Eventually, I ended the relationship.. maybe it was a reverse discard. Before she left, she knew she went too far and she tried to give me a love bomb... I rejected the love bomb which sent her into a rage unlike any I'd seen before.. It sounded like she was tearing the house apart, but I did not react. I sat stoically knowing she'd be gone in a day, and I would fix whatever damage she was doing to my home. MY home- she had no job, no income. Turned out she did no damage she merely wanted me to think she was breaking stuff so I would come running to stop her. That's what she wanted me to do, but I sat quietly downstairs... no reaction at all. She came stomping downstairs and said "I want to leave!" She went outside to have a cigarette (I hated that she smoked) before she could finish her smoke she had a text message with a ticket for the first train out the next morning- destination to where her daughter lives. I was the best supply she ever had and the best she'll ever have. She blocked me before I knew about the blocking/unblock game. She focused on getting new supply because if she did have supply lined up, he backed out.... probably married future-faking her about leaving his wife until that day came and he backed out. So she was left alone- even her daughter wouldn't take her in. She dropped her mom off at an extended stay motel. She finally got new supply, but he is weak-sauce. He doesn't make enough money to provide the lifestyle she is accustomed to... but he is safe mediocre supply, she probably thought he'd never leave her like she thought I'd never leave. (I hung in for 11 years until the abuse came daily with few love bombs nearly no affection in between.) I didn't come chasing her- I let her go. At some point 8 months later she liked a couple posts I wrote on mutual friends walls... that was how I learned she unblocked me. I ignored it. A couple weeks later (when I didn't respond.. when I didn't block her, I guess she thought the coast was clear and I would be receptive.) she tried to video call me in the middle of a week night. Maybe that was an accident. I was asleep and didn't answer. She messaged me immediately after the unanswered call asking to see the dogs- I imaging her current supply was sleeping soundly right next to her as she was trying to reconnect with me, perhaps she was in another room. I did not reply. Later that day she asked again to send pictures of the dogs. I replied, "You have photos of the dogs. Look at the photos you already have." And then I blocked her. That must have caused a narcissistic injury that sent her reeling to the mat. I have not unblocked her since that day. A few months later, a mutual friend contacted me with some nonsensical horse crap.. "havent talked to you in a while.." and after a few lines of idle chit-chat she made her intention clear.. she asked how the narc is doing, and if I still talk to her. I simply replied "I haven't spoken with her in more than a year. I wish her the best from afar." So once again, her hoover attempt was swatted down. I don't want to know anything about her, but I heard that she's moving somewhere. I guess that means things didn't work out with the current supply, so I expect she might soon try to reach out to me again. I almost want her to try again so I can reject her again. I want her to feel rejected like the way she rejected me, over and over and over for the course of those 11 wasted years. She deserves that pain, she earned it. I ain't ever taking her back, not in a million years! I didn't know at the time of the breakup what a narcissist is... I thought it was a person who liked to admire themselves in the mirror (which she does... and posting 10 selfies to social media per day, desperate for people to like her photos.) Only since I started healing did I see how she abused me... flirting with guys right in front of my face... probably cheated on me, if not physically she was not emotionally faithful, triangulation, gaslighting, silent treatment, manipulation, provoking arguments out of nowhere... I ignored those provocations for 45 minutes- she was incessant.. when I couldn't bear it any more I raised my voice.. not yell... just raised my voice. She accused me of yelling at her and call me monster- this happened often. That's what she needed to regulate her emotions. Total projection... she is the monster. She destroys relationships with everyone misfortunate to fall in love with her, or even care for her, including her daughter. She is an empty vessel, she has no heart, no empathy, no compassion, and no love. She is intensely cruel. I hope she gets what she deserves.
She rearranged the living room cuz she wanted your weenie boy or arshole REACTION. Which she didn't get she saw your strength. Then wanted you more cuz your strong. It's one of the traits she wants from you
Best post I’ve read in a while
Sounds like my 2 yrs with my narc.
My narc blocked me during a normal conversation just before Christmas - after two years of me giving everything I possibly could to her. Absolutely no change in her behavior or communication, and within a split second - gone.
Here we are six months later, she sends me a text saying "lol Spain 🇪🇸" at the full-time whistle after England lost the Euros final.
I ran to Telegram as soon as I saw the text, but I'd already been reblocked within a matter of seconds.
Literally never did anything to them, and here they are trying to hurt me and expecting me to feel anger due to the fact I can't even confront her on her message.
Unfortunately for her, I met somebody else who treats me like an actual human being. 😅
Oh, a just for some added juicy gossip - I dated another narc before her. This narc was LDR, would visit me for vacations over the years but would always hold back on me emigrating so we could actually begin to experience real domestic life and not a 2 week vacation visit where the hardships of life are never present.
Kept me LDR for almost a decade, then age 26 she leaves me for a predator in his 60s who'd literally groomed her. Like, techniques you'd expect to work on a child. She was just so desperate got an easier supply, and he was there.
Happened on the film set for Umbrella Academy, they found out that their most senior employee had been having sex with their most inexperienced female employee (first time working on a film set, been there months and he risked her career even though apparently he loved her for who she was and not her age lol) and anyway, both were fired simultaneously but the given reason wasn't related to any of the grooming or sex. They covered it up. Dude got rehired at another studio and was free to prey upon another young female.
Tried to help her, spent months having to hear all the traumatic details of his relationship with her - but somehow, to this day she still thinks I'm the terrible human being.
Ugh, narcs.
fantastic...came at a weird time cuz a friend who lived by my ex who he does not know contacted me out of the blue...does your ex live at blank blank street...i said yes why she said i just walked past him and he looks like shit....i started laughing because that day i said im pretty much healed and feeling happy again and now i am going to start getting little breadcrumbs of vindication....and there it was
With social media,i feel their supply is endless
Yepp! But mine when I was feeling really good he looked NOT good!😳 so I know I need to do alot of work on focusing on myself and noone else!
@ainahaga I relate, my first court date, my soon ex husband looked like shit
@@ladyvirgo013 yeah but he posted pictures on fb beeing in thailand. I caught him having chat apps on his phone when with him and it seemed like he worked hard to keep up with the supplies, I mean its easy now with all social media with people. Ive gone off all social media except some videoes on my youtube, working on my self alot. Writing recipes, slowly exercising more, eating more and more healthy, doing things that please me , gonna start singing/dancing in my apartment soon too. I have had a break in it but gonna make videoes. Have worked on fasting but have been soooo hungry since he discarded me the last time in the end of october. But I will get there slowly! We went back and fortj both of us discarding eachother haha🤷🏼♀️ a totally crazy situationship if you ask me! I wanna become my best version so I can attract my dream man one day😃 I know he is out there😍 but I have no hurry, he will appear when the time is right. Im sure of it
Just when I truly been feeling good and doing good, The Ex-Narcissist is starting to frequent my workplace. It's been more than a year since first & final discard. It's weird and caught me off guard. Is he watchihg me? Its stalking. Is that a hoover when they come to your job, right and many times? All I want is to be left alone and would NEVER go back to Ex-Narcissist. I may need to leave my job, sooner than later...
Love that you made two videos for us today ! 👍👍👍 and they both just prefect as always, beautiful images of the nature. Thank you Joe ! ❤🤗 logically next one should be called '' Why the narcissist never returns😊'' 15.9K 😯👋👋👋
You can feel their rumination. When you start thinking of them more or they randomly pop into your head there’s a reason
There is a similar saying (out of sight, out of mind) in Spanish: "Corazon que no ve, corazon que no siente." If you hear someone tell you that in a way that indicates they believe in that, run.
Yes exactly! Great comment.
That say a lot of wasteful time if they can’t remember your name next week
Fantastic channel
I dont think mine will ever return cause I told him I do not have contact with exes. So when he discarded me I blocked him. They can even be dangerous! Im staying away! I told him no to both marry him and said no to not move with him
Thanks Joe :)
I been watching your videos… very informative
Great talk. Narcs need therapy and lots of it. Same with codependents..yadayada yada ..Raising Our Conscioueness
My narc ex never returned. Played massive head games, lied and manipulated me but never came back
Good for you!!
Yet. They never came back YET.
@@templemanning6180 he has moved on. Got involved before our divorce was final. They just moved in together. Replaced me, my kids w another woman and her kids. Everything he does is very calculated and controlling. He won't come back because I hold him accountable for his horrible behavior
Every narc is different. Not all of them come back, but some do ritualisticly..but I do know like you, from experience, that if you hold them accountable, they can't handle it, it's a narcissistic bruise to their ego and they can't fully come back from it and now see us as the enemy
@@Freethnkr perfectly said
This is the best video Ever! on this subject.. Thankyou ❤🙏
What a fucking waste of life lmao I feel so much weight lifted n feel a new future n I can still bawl my eyes out but it feels better than six months ago
After 4 years, i realized nothing was really said. It was superficial
How do you know this stuff😮 thank you for this video. I’m going to play it again
Hoover 3... Now I'm not even replying. He's just asking me for help and advice lol
Clearly thinks I'm stupid but wants me to think he respects my opinions
Like I'd give help after the horrible devalue and discard... Goodbye sir
Thank you joe
Even if you exposed them, they blocked you and time has gone by?
If you expose them, they may not come back.
Especially if you create a narcissistic injury which most of the time they actual cause.👈🏻
I may also be, the case, that if they are comorbid with borderline and NPD they might not come back and that will be because of the borderline part. I hear that when a borderline is done, they are done.
I am starting to post more on my other channel - www.youtube.com/@chillinwithjoe6380
Check it out if you would like to see some of my other content!
Your videos are awesome. Can you make some on narcissist wives who use kids as pawns especially in legal battles and mediations. Also how to tackle a narcissist partner with kids in married life?/ Thanks in advance.
I love your other channel! Yes, keep it going! The various topics, pictures, and humor are awesome! I like the "Hitch Hiker" one I rmr.
Appreciate You, Joe! ❤❤❤😌💯
Can you post the other videos you mentioned in this podcast please... I appreciate it...
Situationsships work if u have a no care attitude , u can appreciate someone from a distance, living with someone is completely different. No closure is fine with me.
Her new supply is the baby she used me for. Never met that kid, never had a hoover. Its been over a yr now
But who wants a type a guy that would do that to begin with???? 🤢
Sounds toxic! Alex! please tell me that there are still men out there that don’t think like that!!!
I wonder
Oh Joe, I have one who I told to bug off, found a new supply, got married, still the guy when he finds out where I worked called me at work, came to my work places (saw him a couple times) sure there were other times.
We're talking 25 years. Never out of mind dude. Your theory is wrong.
Ya my xnarc now has lung cancer.
I texted him saying..."Stop trying to die. I told you God isnt finished yet with You. Maybe you should ask God why and when you do....be very quiet and listen". I'm a sigma empath....that was the best I could say to him. He is using his "cancer" as a sheild. Poor victim. Doesnt need to make ammends cause he has cancer now. What a joke.
Why is your voice so hot
oh man how did i get here it's insane