Interview on living with Schizoid Personality Disorder
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 มี.ค. 2024
- LC very kindly agreed to be interviewed about schizoid adaptation/schizoid personality disorder! We discussed several topics, ranging from relationships, therapy with schizoid personality disorder, employment, positives and challenges of living with schizoid personality disorder, and social interactions.
My knowledge on schizoid personality disorder is very limited, so I was especially grateful for LC's patience with my many questions. One clarification that wasn't included in the final video, but I wanted to note here, is that individuals with schizoid adaptation can experience a broad range of experiences related to empathy (some feeling less intense empathy, some feeling deep empathy.)
Timestamps:
00:11- 2:00: How would you describe schizoid personality disorder?
2:01- 9:30: Most difficult part of having SPD, relationships
9:31 - 13:20: Positives about having SPD
13:21 - 36:20: Experiences with therapists, receiving SPD diagnosis
36:21- 40:37: What you enjoy in life
40:38 - 43:50: Splitting with SPD
43:51 - 47:23: What would your ideal life be like?
47:24 - 50:20: Employment, schools, and job accommodations
50:21 - 54:39: What advice would you give to your younger self?
#neurodivergent #schizoid #schizoidpersonalitydisorder #autism #neurodiversity #mentalhealth #interview #therapy #personalitydisorder #personalitydisorders #schizoaffective #schizophrenia #spd
As a schizoid nothing triggers me more than to hear someone around me say "we live in a society and we have to get along with each other" after telling them I don't really seek interactions as they don't stimulate me. I just don't get it. What I hear they say in reality is "you have to satisfy my social needs and your need to be left alone minding your business is not important". People's needs are more important than yours is what you feel like when you are schizoid. Wanting to be left alone is costly and people around you become hostile or irritated. People are self centered and do not own it. Do you and I'll do me is what an spd tells himself a lot!
Thank you so much for your comment! I can imagine that would be frustrating and tiring and agree that people shouldn't feel an entitlement to another person's social interest. Ironically, the quote about living in society and needing to get along should really (in my opinion) be a lesson for those of who are more extroverted to respect the needs of those who prefer to not seek social interactions as often -- not a reason to pester those who have SPD to be "more social"! I'm sorry you've had these experiences. All the best.
Hi, first of all, your interview was awesome. I should have acknowledged this in my previous comment. I appreciate your respectful and receptive approach. Love your energy.
I was a bit angry with life yesterday... just got back from therapy this morning after years of hiatus. What I would suggest to schizoid people like me is to get therapy if they want to have some degree of normalcy and a job to earn living on their own. Choose a job in which you are mainly focusing on your own tasks within a certain social setting to not get isolated and alienated (warehouse job for example, like myself). Social isolation could lead to psychosis. This is what is shared between all the "schizo" types. Psychosis.
Wear a social mask at work in the best of your ability. Just for your working hours. Do not force yourself to go to work parties and meet colleagues outside of work. Explain your condition to your boss when you have been hired. You can lower expectations by telling your boss you are on the spectrum, since a lot of spd traits are shared with Asperger and autism. This will make being receptive to your schizoid personality more welcomed. Autism is known and respected thanks to political correctness.
As for friends, family and significant other, DO not put any pressure on yourself. My rule is 5% social (work, grocery store, errands...), 95% alone time.
If your family respects your boundaries, that's a plus. If you don't want friends or a so, don't force yourself.
Focus your limited social needs on work. This will give you your off days and your work day nights to be on your own.
Kudos to the schizoid guy being interviwed. You are giving us a good reputation. You are articulate, intelligent and not zombie like.
My ex-boyfriend had SPD. Tragically, he is no longer alive because he committed suicide. We dated about 2 or 3 times; we were both in our early 30s. And then I savagely went off on him. I berated him about his former job designing industrial robots. And then I disappeared from his life for 3 weeks. When I reappeared, our friends told me that he had committed suicide.
IF ONLY I knew then what I know now. I didn't even know he had SPD. I try to forgive myself, but I partially hold myself responsible for his death. I will love him forever, and I hope to find someone like him whom I can make it up to somehow.
His talk about wanting to stay autonomous in relations is actually very healthy. I do the same, because i value the relation with myself first. And thats what those that dont care about autonomy dont. MEANING, they are about feeding the false self, not the true self. This guy is simply highly developed imo. And very wise.
Thanks so much for your comment -- absolutely agree that he is very wise and has a lot of valuable perspectives.
I have SPD, and not all of us have the same bullet points. But the part here that rang so true for me, is the subject of friends. It's like I don't want friends, because they can be high maintenance. I'm perfectly fine without them. But over the course of a lifetime, friends do happen. I have a few of them.. online only, and all of them I don't feel obligated to stay in touch with, and they don't expect me to. We're actually incredibly close, can talk about anything, and a few years can go by with no contact, then suddenly a day comes where it's like I never left and we talk for hours.
That's what friendship is to me. Knowing someone hasn't forgotten who I am.
Thank you so much for your comment! The last line especially is profound -- the friendships you describe sound very close and secure.
Hmm I appreciate that type of friendship too
Not diagnosed but feels very much like me. I'm not trying to hurt anybody but I continuously make people feel rejected and that's the painful part bc it's not intentional. Feel misunderstood constantly. I just require a lot of emotional and relational space. People exhaust me and I regret that's the case but it is. I don’t require what most people do. My emotions are my responsibility and I don’t require anything from others besides respect. Have a strong lack of relational and social need. I can handle me, and I would just appreciate if people could accept me.
Thank you very much for your comment-- I'm sorry you've experienced constant misunderstandings. Your sentence ("My emotions are my responsibility and I don't require anything from others besides respect") is very thought-provoking -- I think that's a remarkable perspective and one that I wish the world became more accepting of.
I’m the same! I have a couple friends I’ve known a long time and they’re all busy and respect my boundaries. But basically everyone that tries to be a “new friend” always wants to do things and ends up being offended or feeling rejected and falls off.
I accept you. 100% relate. You are not the only one who lives like this.
I can totally relate. Having to deal with people’s social and emotional needs is exhausting
You are spd. I'm just acting normal by default and people get triggered or offended because I'm cold but am not really. It is a frustrating condition.
"I keep my external body alive so I can enjoy my internal world"
I also found that to be a striking quote!
Thanks so much for posting this interview, and thanks so much to LC for volunteering to peek over the wall and give a true account of a schizoid's perspective, a rare event. Each of us is different in our experience and expression of our schizoid (+) adaptations, but my own experience parallels LC's description very closely.
The DSM/ICD criteria would have everyone believe that we are all sexless, uncaring, disinterested misanthropes without souls, and while our behaviors might often reflect those traits and some of us even experience them personally at times, the truth behind the schizoid defense, dilemma, and persona is that we keep our (fragmented) true selves locked away from the prying and judging eyes, grasping and shoving hands, shallow rejecting minds, and copious emotional projectile vomiting for protection of our very sensitive (and empathetic) natures. We've been well-acquainted with the consequences of attempting to express our true interests and feelings, and the misunderstanding, rejection, conflict, and invalidation that usually results- many of us have little or no conscious access to the emotional or episodic memories of the events and non-events that inspired our defensive adaptations, either because they happened (or DIDN'T happen- emotional neglect, engulfment, and misattunement) so young or because we had to cut the emotional wiring harness to prevent complete meltdown of our psyches due to overwhelming environments.
For many (if not all) neurodivergence plays a part in our early alienation and estrangement- some insist that the schizoid condition IS a type of neurodivergence, either innate or as a result of trauma-induced remodeling of brain physiology and neural pathways. Either way, we end up in the same place: minimally interacting with a hostile world through a meat-avatar with well-developed cognitive skills while our true selves hunker down within our battlements, largely estranged from the exiled parts of ourselves that could experience any pleasure or purpose locked away in the dungeons of our subconscious for their own protection... and forgotten; sometimes, when it's quiet, their muffled pleas to be attended to echo through the hollow halls of my mind from behind locked doors to which I have no key.
I identify strongly with LC's affinity for music; though I am not myself a musician, some of my dissociated parts WANTED to be, before their exile. Instead, that desire has been addressed vicariously mostly through Prog. Rock/Metal artists whose music and lyrics resonated with my own inner experience/ethics and external observations, and those artists became my psychologists, philosophers, and priests in my late teens when there was no one else, and are largely responsible for my not disconnecting even more totally, providing me with language to help arrange my thoughts and stray emotions, and literally for my continued breathing. It's similar with me to LC's explanation that it creates a type of resonant connection within, like a plucked guitar string causing another to hum in empathetic harmony- the vicarious identification with the artist's story similarly resonates with something subconscious in a mysterious secret communication, and in those moments I can sometimes enter a kind of flow state, and tattoo the page with the ink of my soul. Afterwards, a price must be paid for disturbing the restless spirits, and the inner critic/"protector"/depression lashes out, just part of the Faustian bargain of the schizoid dilemma.
I also agree with LC that splitting is a defensive strategy at the core of all "disorders", and a component of many less extreme adaptations and coping mechanisms as well, often expressing as "black and white thinking", which currently within the psychology profession and the "mental health" community in general is "treated" using CBT/DBT as the "go to" standard of therapeutic "help", and for some less entrenched conditions seems to serve well, but..."Mehh, your Jedi mind tricks don't work on me." , at least not very well. "Disorders" are pervasive because they formed early in development, while the rest of the personality was being framed, and became an integral part of our cognitive and emotional structure. They were necessary survival adaptations to a dysfunctional and/or threatening environment- it worked successfully!, we survived!- can it honestly be defined as a "disorder"? Or shouldn't it properly be viewed as a costly adaptation to a f*cked up world, a high price of admission to a sh*t show we'd rather not attend?
Since my self-assessment as a 'zoid about a year ago I've taken up this issue as a sort of crusade to help set the record straight and advocate for a more realistic and helpful view of human psychology. I spent my entire life mostly alienated and mute, and 3 years of intense study to finally learn why- most of the information I found resonated somewhat but only seemed to address "first world problems" and didn't seem to fit my experience. Even the SPD criteria didn't seem to fit, due to its overemphasis of the most extreme outward presentations without any context of the inner experience of the human being behind the label. This deficiency in the literature and "professional" descriptions cost me A LOT of precious time, and I only found my answers thanks to a TH-camr who posted a video/lecture that for the first time accurately described my internal experience (Mind Mastery-"Schizoid P.D.- Behind The Wall"). Soon after, my search led me to Schizoid Vision and Schizoid Angst, where I found my voice and a community that encouraged my participation, and introduced me to depth psychology, psychoanalysis, and a pair of professional psychology goddesses (Dr. Elinor Rosenberg, Dr. Nancy McWilliams) who really DO know what they're doing and are trying to drag the psychology profession out of the Behaviorist Dark Ages and back into the light of the Humanities, where it belongs, with Object Relations, Psychoanalysis, Developmental Psychology, well-documented research, and humanistic methods as the foundations of education and therapeutic practice. Why do I and so many other 'zoids "refuse" treatment? We've done our homework and heard the horror stories, and have our own history with people to remind us of what to expect. We see the deficiencies in the 938 pages of third-rate toilet paper the profession consults as their doctrinal standard (see the PDM2 for an example of a more realistic model). Why would we trust our safety, sanctity, and welfare to someone who hasn't shown any interest or competence in methods that might actually help? We aren't interested in paying exorbitant fees to be treated as a statistic, a "resistant patient" that spoils a therapist's streak of "good results", a sociology project worm to be matamorphosed into a "butterfly", a guinea pig for testing pharmacology cocktails, or a beggar for whatever "help" some insurance company bean counter determines is "appropriate" based on actuarial tables. Generally speaking, with a few unaffordable exceptions, this IS the true current state of available therapeutic practice, and it's horrifying. We all deserve better. Maybe if enough of us scream loudly enough things will improve, until then we have ourselves and each other. For now, I'm still hiding behind a borrowed avatar, but maybe soon I'll be ready to be more vocal and visible. I hope others can be stirred to join the conversation as well, for the benefit of all of us who have had to adapt to a f*cked up world, but especially for those who are yet to get their turn and don't have a voice.
If you read this far, thanks for hanging in- your reward for stooping this low is a second peek through the keyhole into another schizoid inner world, each one unique and multi-faceted. If you are ever invited in to one of them, take it as a sign of confidence in your trustworthiness that is seldom found sufficient and seldom extended - please don't violate it like those others before have, and you may just find yourself in for a pleasant surprise, despite what the papers say.
Thank you so very much for taking the time to write and share these insights. Your points about "refusing" treatment and being perceived as resistant are particularly interesting -- I would also be interested to learn more about what you wrote regarding information somewhat resonating but being relatively limited to first world problems.
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 Thanks for your response and your interest in my views of the schizoid condition and the tenuous relationship with the current standards of psychology and the (mis)understanding of defensive adaptations. I will be glad to expand on my personal experiences with and observations about the commonly available information; a summarized way of understanding the problem can be gained through the concept of living inside our heads with varying limited ability to relate our "insider" perspective with the experiences of people in the "outside" world, due to the phalanx of defenses we must manage to engage at all. It isn't due to enmity or lack of empathy as is commonly assumed, but primarily to the difficulty of being in two worlds at once, a trick I have not mastered yet. Currently my inner thoughts are a bit removed from my access, as I have been forced to confront a few "first world" concerns of my own and am "out of the office", but as soon as I can return I will make a fully-present attempt to further articulate my perspectives for the benefit of others who may have similar experiences, and for the purpose of expanding understanding of a very misunderstood minority. Thanks for your interest and efforts to raise awareness, every voice helps. I will reply here again soon.
Between the very digestable delivery, smooth effective innerplay between you two THEN the sincereity of the info .....
I am not sure what to praise first!!
You give me hope for everyone accessing screen based portals to themselves in their own journey.
Live and thrive!
Ametican F age 73...long stuck in remote UK. Aspergers. ADHD. CPSTD. Blessed living by finding the positive and watching this was for sure Positive on so many levels!
Thank you for your very kind and encouraging comment! I appreciate it and your positive outlook-- and agree that one of the beautiful parts of the Internet is the chance for people to learn about themselves through hearing the experiences of others. Wishing you all the best!
I’m only 6 min in and I’ve not disagreed with single thing yet. I’ve been diagnosed for a few years now. Hard to find good content on the subject. Thanks y’all.
i've long since suspected that I have SPD, but I'd never really given it much thought in all honesty. I always figured I was trying to "change who I was" to be someone else, but the concept of the "false self" and the "true self" really resonated with me. I literally felt physically uncomfortable listening to this interview, it was like someone was reading my mind, putting words to nebulous thoughts and concepts I've had in my head for so long that it was borderline eerie to listen to someone else actually say things like that in a way that I never could. His comments on losing autonomy was also something that hit pretty hard. Thanks for putting the work in for this interview, it was a great listen.
Thank you so much for your comment -- I am truly glad that the interview was helpful for you and that his perspective helped put some of your experiences to words (though I can see where it would also be a bit eerie or uncomfortable to feel as if someone is describing your thoughts!). All the best.
That conversation towards the end. Thats an "a-ha moment". Yes NT people just enjoy the back and forward. Ive been treated as uncaring and too blunt for suggesting solutions. They dont want the solution, they want to complain 😂 if i cant talk in the way thats normal for me...then i cant talk at all. I just nod with my head and say "ah", "yep", "really" and they can go on and on and they love it 😅
Absolutely! I find that often when people ask for advice, they really just want a supportive listener or opportunity to vent (and I've been guilty of that myself at times too) rather than suggestions for a solution.
I get irritated by the "have a lovely weekend", "enjoy the rest of your day" comments from strangers. Been cited a curmudgeon over being so, however it just feels false to me. I do your keep shtum, smile and nod thing too.
@@peteracton2246 For this, you can just chalk it up to politeness and manners. It's not the same thing as it being false, though. In my work life, I use these phrases often. They are not fake at all. They are me being polite and presenting myself as who I am. I am a caring, sympathetic, and empathetic person and I present myself honestly. By and far, people appreciate kindness and politeness from strangers. I know not everyone does. I understand when someone responds with just a nod and smile. I don't have any ill feelings towards anyone that doesn't respond in kind. I am acutely aware why some don't and I completely understand it. I just want you to understand that, at least in my experience, these are not fake or false, but they are also not something you have to read too much in to or worry about. I hope this helps you be less irritated by those people.
Really good information and layout, thank you both.
Thank you so much for your kind comment! Glad the video was helpful.
Best piece I have EVER seen on the topic…you need many thousands of subs. Would love to see female schizoid interview.
Ah, thank you so much for your very kind comment! I definitely agree it would be interesting to interview women with SPD! I know the way autism presents can sometimes be correlated with gender, would be curious if the same holds for schizoid adaptation.
I appreciate this video.Thank you.
You're very welcome! Thank you for your comment.
Very informative, Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much for watching!
Thank you both very much for this. My only successful long-term partnership was with a person later diagnosed as having a personality disorder. We are still great friends. As I wasn't aware of my autism at the time, I see this as a case of "assortative mating". We were in some ways similar and, in some of our experience of being in the world, quite different. It was interesting to hear from someone with SPD as actually me and my ex never really discuss mental health! We support each other, which was an big element of our relationship looking back, co-dependence, but cool imho.
Thank you so much for your comment and for sharing! You bring up a great point about "assortative mating", I'm guessing that assortative mating is quite common even when neither person realizes they are neurodivergent! I'm glad that you and your ex are able to support each other and maintain a great friendship. (And I also found it very interesting to hear from someone with SPD-- it's a condition I knew very little about prior to the interview, and still have much to learn about!). All the best.
Thanks Sam. My ex said I was the only sane person they knew! It resonated, LC finding that safe person. Maybe my ex experienced that in me. A symbiosis and they have a lot of great qualities I lack. Just to add, I see many of my friendships in life have been "assortative" although I'm not going to armchair-diagnose anyone (that's a professional job).
Perhaps what you experienced wasn't codependence, but interdependence, which, mentally setting aside my own schizoid dilemma and defenses, is what we all really want and seldom find. The term "codependency" has been used to stigmatize mutual trust and reliance, and to create a false narrative about "independence" and (hyper)"individualism" by stigmatizing our natural mammalian physiological and neurological bonding instincts- it's good for business, if your business is to monopolize access to goods and services, to insert yourself as intermediary into every human interaction, and to substitute shallow hedonic distractions for emotional contentment. My schizoid dynamics compromise my ability and desire to engage in both types of transactions to varying degree, but my cognitive capacities to recognize patterns and analyze cause and effect from a detached perspective are NOT compromised. "Co-dependency" certainly exists; it IS the currency of social transaction among the vast majority of the neurotypical befuddled masses, and it appears to me to not be "normal' behavior but a coping mechanism for deficient attachment in infancy and a result of intergenerational and cultural abuse- I know from my own history and cultural meta-history a "bit" about that. But with that said, humans are not evolved for solitary material existence or for a shallow faceless consumerist ant hill like the world we have made- we evolved as small interdependent groups within specific environments over at least 200,000 years before we began to be "domesticated", and we have since "progressed" to the wretched disenfranchised current state.
Neurotypical, neurodivergent, schizoid...some part of each of us just wants to go home. I had that interdependent relationship once, and ONLY once; I devoted my life to it and thrived, and would have given what was left to keep it. If you have something like that, don't devalue it because of misguided social conventions or pseudo-scientific labels. Take it from a 'zoid- it's cold and dark out there, but the void is even colder and darker.
@@don-eb3fj Thanks Don for your insight. Truly I used the term (codependence) without much thought or real understanding. I apologise if this offended anyone. Yes, that relationship was, I suspect, as close as I'll ever get in my life and we are still friends. Our mutual understanding is to be treasured. I agree that the deep history of us humans would be all about small groups knowing, supporting and complimenting each other. The world is different now and frankly I struggle. Some people have called those who are autistic the "missing-link" (again sorry if that offends anyone, not my idea). I do feel that I am designed for a (much) simpler place and time. Best wishes Peter
Thank you so much!
I tend to have moderate judgemets. And think of myself as agnostic. But it feels like this video is Godsend.
Thanks a ton for giving valuable info on how people with SA think. And how to interact with them.
Thank you so much for your extremely kind comment-- I am glad the video was helpful, and also learned a lot myself from the interview about how people with SA think and how to interact! Wishing you all the best.
Hi, Thank-you for offering the information re: experimenting with hallucinogenics aka tripping. I had friends who went that route and I noticed some of them changed while still teenagers, and others as we all got older. Some weren't hurt at all, to my knowledge, but some who dabbled with it ended up with schizophrenic. Theyre all good ppl, some struggled more that others. One or 2 struggled a lot more and eventually died due to multiple complications. Ive concluded experimenting with hallucinogenics is a gamble that young and old need to be aware of. Too many people present it as harmless in their opinion. I never par-took even though I had multiple opportunities. Maybe something in me knew it would not be a good idea for me. I definitely have a problem with the vulnerability factor, especially after (passively) seeing someone going thru a "bad trip." Who really knows what, or if, there is a connection and if some types of ppl are more pre-disposed to factors that may be more likely to develope or bring the dormant schizoid out or more forward, or leave sone kind of perminant thumbprint, expression or even scaring. Anyone who's had surgery understands the reality of adhesions and scarring of the body's delicate tissues.
All the information you shared is interesting and helpful to the greater good. I have a lot of respect for your willingness to share your perspective with audiences, including psychological and medical professionals who can learn from your candid honesty.
On a lighter note 🎶🎵 Music is the universal language. Ppl are frequency beings, and music is too via harmonics, (root word Harmony is interesting.) frequecy oriented, its no wonder it can affect us all. It can also heal, I wonder if your skitz seems well managed at least partially bc of your enjoyment of Music. I know the right kind of music can help early childhood development. The documentary was about how music heals brain injury after soldiers had traumatic brain injury TBI, from large shrapnel and other things that come from war. There were also people who had suffered strokes were proven to benefit craigslist from music therapy..
I can't help but wonder if the right music can help people with certain brain illnesses and afflictions like schizophrenia and others. I watched and was amazed by this documentary show, 60 Minutes, 20/20 or something like that and 15 or 20 years ago and haven't heard much about it since. But it might be worth investigating. Bearing in mind for those that don't know, the wrong kind of agitating music can have bad effects as well. The study had definitively shown via supporting imagery how music helps heal damaged brain tissue. It's a highly specialized field that requires "certified music therapists" to work in the hospitals, and music therapy accelerated the healing of the brain healing accelerated by something like four times faster. Maybe it's kept under wraps because they'd rather offer pharmaceuticals or it's possible bc insurance doesn't pay for music therapy and it's only available to the most wealthy. It's worth a few searches to see if there's information out there if you get curious, it might provide some insights into why you enjoy music so much, and it seems to make everyone's brain and mood feel better. Like lullabies for children, and kids who learn faster by listening to Beethoven and Mozart, They're just seems to be something to the fact that it's multicensory and involves tapping to keep the count & beatE even just the tiniest finger tapping if the injured weren't yet able to move their legs, and was shown to got the patients on the road to recovery like nothing lands in before and we're finally able to prove with that latest study. I'm not explaining it very well but, look into "Certified Music Therapy" if the idea of a similar connection interests you or, anyone else who may be interested.
Anyway, very sorry for this long post, I just felt the need to share these thoughts b4 they slipped my mind. Thanks again for sharing your personal testimony. I'm sure it will be helpful to many people. 🕊️
Thank you very much for your kind comment-- I'm glad the video was helpful. I agree with you regarding the risk of psychedelics in those at risk for certain mental health conditions such as psychosis. It's definitely not an area I'm closely familiar with, having never personally used substances myself, but it tentatively seems like a topic that is difficult to find neutral/balanced sources on.
I really appreciate your framing of music as a universal language. I agree that music can be a powerful tool and personally have found a great deal of comfort in it-- and hope to see more research on the topic in the future!
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 Yes, I agree with all your points. We also need to remember that Music can be used as a weapon for evil. I've seen discussions that indicate music can potentially opening different portals, summons different things, on used in hypnosis, And I for one am not turning my brain over to any of these strange new age, harmonic resonance type videos. They may be wonderfully helpful, or they could be some baby form of psychic driving. Who knows? That's why I mentioned researching the Certified Music Therapy when it comes to healing ppl with traumatic brain injury (TBI). It's a very different discipline than some of this new age, mystic, mystifying, voodoo, bad juju, Lol, my goodness the list can go on forever. Play it safe, don't let people plant crap into your head. I have an inherited musculoskeletal illness and some of these channels offer "healing" vibrational music if you want to call like that. It's not clear to me what it is. I learned to play flute and junior high band class. Learning to read sheet music went on to help me with mathematics, so I did well in mechanical drawing. Where we used a lot of measurement and fractions, that class later ended up helping me end up in the graphic arts. By way of photography. So for me artistic endeavors are an excellent way to express many things. Art is so subjective, and I love that The value of each piece is determined like beauty, uniquely in the eye of the person looking at it. Music and art cannot be appreciated enough. They should never be allowed to take it out of schools, though they have. I had an excellent band instructor, that was a natural with teenagers. I'm so glad he had that gift talent for working with teenagers otherwise I might have thrown the whole learning opportunity out tthe window. And then later I pursue photography at the community / Jr College level and got hired on as an apprentice in the graphic arts field. It was a one stepping stone at a time way to my career path. There was so much out there I didn't even know was available, so I tell young people to pursue the long shots, you never know where opportunity is. Be willing to look behind every door, and be willing to digest some rejection, simply because there's often multiple applicants for one spot. Good manners and humility and go a long way when you're trying to earn your stripes. Junior college and apprenticeship opportunities might be good information for people who do not feel 4 year university is the right path for them. There is more than one way to find a career and it doesn't always have to involve taking out giant loans before you know where your interests and natural gifts can be best used to make a living. Some people are naturally smart and can learn by just being in the right atmosphere. Sometimes that atmosphere is your own backyard. Others have to track halfway across the country, or around the world, to open up to learning about certain things. Long live options. Anyway went off on another long tangent, I apologize, I'm trying to cram too many thoughts in a small space. My only hope is that people will use music and art safely and appreciatively. And maybe I'm just being superstitious but don't fall asleep to resonance, type musics that could do a little brain twisting. It may be the greatest thing, but once you've fallen asleep, who knows what mind bending sort of programming could have been strategically put in there. They could hypnotize you into believing you have to buy a $3,000 course in order to truly be your best self. Again just like with hallucinogenics don't gamble your brain away except under situations that are clearly defined and explained. And dance, that old saying dance like no one's looking! I do that all the time at home, it's great exercise, and when you're feeling down just put on some music and either fall asleep to music you know, or oh my goodness I love falling asleep too rain on a tin roof. But I have to turn it down low or it'll just keep me awake. If they could heal my musculoskeletal issues with certain harmonies I think that information would be common knowledge by now. I have every reason to wish some of that healing music could work, but when there's no one that would have to take responsibility it's pretty easy for things, People or situations to be abused. I'm just not much for gambling and possibly end up worse, or in anyway I stuck with something I didn't know I was buying into. Anyway, peace love, hope, charity, kindness, and all good things. I apologize for the mess this is but I've got several things distracting me, little things, lol. Take care.🕊️
Thanks for mentioning the apathy insight.
Thank you for your comment! Glad the apathy insight was helpful.
Thanks!
Thank you so much for your very kind donation! I'm glad the video was helpful.
I've been on a bit of a journry in learning about myself, very recently in fact, and it's been very reassuring to hear another perspective, the part where he said that the one thing he enjoyed was humour, relieved a lot of self doubt, along with the the critisism talk (im appreciate critisism waay more than praise, i would say i don't like praise that much because it leaves me in a possition where i have to pretend to feel good about it.
The one online relationship i had was so, nothing, it felt more like a task with a bit of fake happiness or accomplisment
i also fully get the whole schizoid dilemma, i fully understand wanting to just shut myself in, but then kinda getting guilty with myself if i don't ghet out and talk to people, it's like being confident with yourself before doing something, but once you actually get the chance to do that thing you don't want to do it
theres a a lot of things i agree with here on what he's saying
my only issue is im not sure how it started for me
thank you so much for this video!
Thank you so much for your comment! I'm very glad that hearing his perspective was reassuring -- the schizoid dilemma definitely sounds like an area that the mental health field could benefit from learning more about! That's an interesting point about also appreciating criticism more than praise -- I imagine being able to receive criticism is a unique skill (not many people seem to have), and I hadn't often considered before how receiving praise could feel like a burden. (I wonder if praise feels less stifling in situations where it's clear that no reply is needed or even possible? E.g. on written evaluations which generally don't have a response option.)
How did i miss this?
Keep up the good work
Thank you so much! We have a few more interviews coming up over the next couple months :)
Your desire at 45:10 and 46:10 are so identical to mine, and I feel (or my gaurdian side feels) similarly, how are you feeling about these things currently?
This interview has been really enlightening into myself and shocking to see someone else similar to me, which I hadn't encountered yet.
Thank you so much for your comment! I'm glad the interview was enlightening for you, and also found LC's discussion about living off the grid to be particularly interesting.
I agree. Being alone in your apartment and seeing cars driving by and people walking outside is reassuring. You are alone and b
Peaceful but on the other hand you don't feel isolated since you are surrounded by people. This is exactly how I feel.
This guy is clearly INTP. It interests me that so many people with this personality type would be considered schizoid. At least in the classic exhibition of those traits. Many more extroverted, emotional and gregarious types could also be considered schizoid. I think understanding it as a personality, not a pathology, is helpful. Existentially understanding what this means for an individual. How someone gets into that state based on their experiences and perceptions. I think autism is also just a variation of schzioid developments. But I am interested in using Myers-Briggs cognitive functions to deconstruct so many so-called personality disorders. A personality disorder is just a sickness of a personality.
Bro I'm Intp myself and damn we are cute ❤. Sorry also hi.
I loved your comment ❤
Thank you so much for your comment! The concept of relating SPD to a personality is certainly interesting-- I don't know much about Myers-Briggs cognitive functions (at least not to any level of detail), but it would be interesting to see how different personality components or sets of personality components correlate with forms of neurodivergence such as SPD.
I’ve been told my dad has this, but I really don’t know because we don’t talk. I gave up on him and he doesn’t need my help. if he did, I would give it to him. I just got tired of expecting something I was never going to get.
Thank you very much for your comment-- I can definitely see where you became tired of expecting something you were never going to get, unmet expectations can be painful. Wishing you all the best.
I was diagnosed with spd recently and I don't have any problem with that. The only problem is people sometimes telling me why are you so cold and why aren't you going out with us?
As a spd I like loneliness and prefer to be alone cause that doesn't botter me at all. Sometimes I feel like people do not understand me so I don't want to interact with them, cause I feel like my world is so different with them and I don't enjoy what they do and talk about. And most of the times I have difficulty finding a subject to talk about with a person, but I got better in communicating recently. Coping with severe depression ,so I had to take some pills and that made me find my true self better Which I stopped the pillls and I feel better, but I've heard a spd can not feel emotions which is somehow true and we can fake it, which is kind of a force .
Thank you so much for your comment and for sharing your thoughts/experiences on interacting with people and being alone. Severe depression can be challenging, and I imagine that might be especially the case if you find others to communicate so differently that it's challenging to enjoy a conversation or if the typical approaches for depression may not be tailored towards people with SPD. Thank you again for your comment and I wish you all the best.
Is it also possible for you to interview somebody that has autism mixed with schizotypal personality disorder? That would be great and helpful.thank you
This is a great suggestion -- absolutely, if I meet anyone who is autistic and has schizotypal personality disorder and wants to share their experiences, I would love to interview them.
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 There is significant overlap in the manifestation of autism and schizoid personality disorder. If you look at a Venn diagram of the two neurotypes, it seems as though the purely Schizoid traits could develop over time (later in life) in an undiagnosed autistic person who had not developed good coping strategies .
This was an interesting conversation thank you both for sharing it.
Depersonalisation and derealisation sucks bad when you have no clue what it is . I was 12 when i started experiencing it ,probally duo thrue childhood trauma. I had weird feelings about my own physical body , like my arm was not mine or robotic like . Also feeling i was living in a dream/dream like states literally pinching myself sometimes if i was truely real 😮. I thought i was the only one that has that and just could not explain it because it was to weird . Luckely when i was older searching the internet i was relieved at what it was called .
Thank you so much for your comment- it must have been extremely stressful to have your body feeling like a robot, especially when you are young and don't know what it is you are experiencing! I'm glad you were able to find information about this online when you were older. Wishing you all the best.
Thank you😃@@allneurotypesoffice7037
I think you're cool. Why try to be "normal?" Unless you're unsatisfied with some area of your life, find people and activities that allow you to keep your boundaries. Just don't come to hate other people and declare war on everyone else or anything. Be yourself and realize there are many variations of "normal." My ex H was likely a schizoid, and I wish I had known then. I may have personalized his behavior too much and that's regrettable for both of us. My only suggestion is about your last point: don't assume someone inviting another to talk about an upsetting thing is self+gratifying. Realize that if you don't feel those emotions yourself, you can't just another's motivations. You are limited in being able to read or interpret these things.
Thank you so much for your comment! I completely agree that finding people and activities that allow you to keep your boundaries is important. It's also interesting to hear your perspective on being married to someone with likely SPD-- there's very little out there on how people without SPD can better understand/relate to those with SPD, but I imagine such resources (if they were to exist!) would be immensely helpful in navigating relationships. Wishing you all the best.
I am not looking to engage in a discussion, but I'd like to mention that I hardly understand people with SPD who have healthy bodies and profound communication skills.
Very interesting! Could you bring someone schizotypal as well?
Thank you very much! Yes, I would love to interview someone who is schizotypal -- it's a condition that I would love to learn more about! It might take awhile to get such an interview set up, though.
Yeah, that was great. I really don’t disagree at any point.
Thanks y’all.
Thank you so much for your kind comment! Glad the video was helpful.
I am diagnosed avpd/bpd , sometimes i feel unsure about being partly schizoid because they overlap eachother in symptoms . Schizoids don't feel the need for social interaction while avpd avoid social interactions out of anxiety . But after being so long on my self it all becomes disinterest for me also. Can avpd turn into schizoid? At its core unfortunately i am avpd i think .
Thank you so much for your comment! This is a very interesting question and unfortunately I am by no means an expert on AVPD or SPD, but I would tentatively conjecture that it is possible for AVPD to turn into SPD in some cases. If someone has experienced significant hurt from interacting with people, there might naturally be a tendency to withdraw (even if still in some way desiring social stimuli, whether through daydreams and internal worlds or through social interaction despite significant anxiety/ambivalence.) So it seems reasonable that the form of withdrawal (disinterest vs anxiety) may shift over time. Though again this is just a guess and only considers one possible reason for social withdrawal-- though there is research suggesting anxiety sometimes leads to anhedonia more generally (www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6080718/). Thank you again for your comment and the interesting question!
Hey thanks for your reply , interesting indeed . The anhedonia part is a huge obstacle for me as well. Also thx for putting up a source .@@allneurotypesoffice7037
I wonder if he is an ISTP, like I think the schizoid vision woman is. A lot of ISTP's seem to be schizoid.
Good question! I'm not sure what his MBTI is -- mine is INFJ, but I also don't have SPD so I guess that probably doesn't help you in terms of data! I do have a close friend with SPD and she is INTJ.
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 Seems to be common in IxTx types (less so ISTJ because they’re duty focussed) because of the emotional disconnection from others and excessive alone time that IxTx’s prefer.
You give INFJ vibes 👍🏻
I sure do wish some of you folks would spell out what some of the acronym stand for, at least the first time mentioned within the text. And then revert to just the acronym. I'm just saying it would help the discussion for people who don't know those acronyms off the top of their head. No criticism just suggestion, it's not just this topic it seems to be a internet wide issue. So many acronyms, some are so similar it's easy to drift off to scanning ones own library of acronym knowledge. And we need to set better examples for the young folks coming up behind us. So they will do the extra work. As well maybe they won't lose interest simply because they lost track of the conversation. Yes some acronyms can be googled, but that's a lot of distraction, when the comenter can more easily offer it up. Anyway just my two pennies worth, because I kind of got lost there. I read the whole post and and not sure what they're about. Peace 🕊️
@kimtonearts - That's a very fair point! MBTI is the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, which is a personality test. To be honest, I am not an expert on the personality categories myself and am not very familiar with the specifics of each acronym but I believe ISTP is sometimes referred to as a "virtuoso" type (www.16personalities.com/istp-personality).
The acronyms themselves are made up of test results in four dimensions: the first letter corresponds to Extraversion (E) or Introversion (I); the second letter corresponds to the way you take in information - Sensing (S) or INtuition (N); the third letter corresponds to how you make decisions - Thinking (T) or Feeling (F); and the last letter corresponds to how you deal with the world - Judging (J) or Perceiving (P). What each of those means specifically and how accurate the test is in general is beyond my scope of knowledge, but an ISTP would be someone the test labels as Introverted, Sensing, Thinking, and Perceiving.
My own type was INFJ which is sometimes referred to as an "advocate" type (www.16personalities.com/infj-personality)-- it does seem to fit fairly well, as I care deeply about people and certain causes, and also have the weaknesses listed (perfectionism, can sometimes be overly moralizing.)
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 ohhh, Okay. Thanks so much for the explanation. I am semi-familiar with the test, a friend of mine mentioned it several years ago. That clears up quite a bit. Very helpful! 🕊️
I have a desire for independence but I've been afraid to b alone because my mind can go on a downward spiral that's hard to get out of. Now my life is so busy that it feels like there's hardly ever any time where i actually think. I need to get back to writing in my journal, it makes me feel more cohesive with my thoughts, things make sense. I too have been seeking the answers to explain the way that i am, quite obsessively, i am pretty sure that I'm autistic it explains so much. But i really relate about losing autonomy, well i hadn't thought of it exactly like that, but i know that when other people r there i don't b myself the way i would if they weren't there. I realize it's happening, i don't like it, it seems dishonest, i wish i could just still b the me that i am when I'm alone. I'm so submissive, not confident
Thank you so much for your comment-- I'm wishing you the very best in your process of seeking answers, and in finding time to rest and write. Downward spirals can be extremely challenging and painful, and it makes sense that you would find it difficult to be alone due to them-- in general, finding who one is (alone and with others) can be a complex topic. Wishing you the best.
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 thank you. May I ask r u autistic?
Of course! Yes, I am autistic!
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 cool. I have found so many great autistic content creators.
I like your interview style, you do a great job. Unfortunately, is he fail diagnosed again.
0:00-2:10 What he is describing in not schizoid but rater parts of the other A-type traits.
3:28 He is talking about accidentally getting into relationships, this would not happen for a completely schizoid person, this person would not participate in activities that can be confused with intimacy and breaking boundaries.
Up until 14:20, have I not heard anything that does not fit some other disorders, but schizoid is he not.
27:35 A schizoid do not want the personal contact, most often not even with family, and generally do not want to connect with other people.
I would advise him to go to a professional who is really working with type-A, and really find out what he is having. :-)
Thank you for your comment! I'm very glad that you like the interview style. :) Sorry for my delayed reply here-- I'm not an expert or qualified to diagnose anyone myself, but I do believe him on his diagnosis and would tentatively guess that most traits of SPD exist on a continuum of sorts. This article seems like an interesting one on people with SPD and relationships (www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understanding-narcissism/202011/how-schizoid-disorders-interfere-intimate-relationships) and how people with SPD might have and/or desire relationships to varying degrees, even if relationships tend to be more challenging and/or of a format that would be perceived as "unconventional" in some way. I do think it would be interesting to interview people with other type-A mental health conditions, though, as there is often not much known about these conditions!
@@allneurotypesoffice7037 Many thanks for your great answer. You are naturally completely correct in that there is a spectrum and SPD has 3 subcategories. It all depends on how specific you want the diagnosis. :-) My reason for commenting is that you make a really great job in conveying a genuine interest, truthfulness and that you want people to be able to use your great interview. Therefore, my concern that some may look at themselves and say "hey, that's not me at all".
But great job, keep it up.
Inf.: I have worked with interview, camera and radio for about 12-15 years in my own country for national outlets. :-)
could the interviewer stop rocking back and forth. it a disturbing trait to have to see
For some people it's just a habit. Probably one he would be willing to work on per his audience's request. For some people it's a coping or self-soothing mechanism. So it may be something he has to work on overtime.
I think it's called stimming that is common part of his personal diagnosis. Maybe he can find a foot rocker that would be less of a distraction, or find out from other people with similar stimming habits the tips and tricks that help them temper it when enough needed. I want saw a real unique shaped item called a soothing stone, it's a small smooth rock that children and other people can use as a self-soothing device in their hand or pocket.
Whatever the case he seems like a polite, open-minded show Host that will welcome such suggestions as Well intentioned, constructive criticism. 🕊️
Yes, for me it is definitely a coping/self-soothing mechanism that is a part of my autism. When I was younger I had developed strategies to try and hide the rocking or use less obvious types of repetitive movements (e.g. fidgeting with a pen-- a soothing stone would have been neat, though!), but ended up having panic attacks whenever I stopped rocking back and forth. Ultimately, I found that the amount of energy I was putting into trying not to rock back and forth was quite tiring and was better spent on more productive/meaningful things such as volunteering!
We do have a podcast (podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-all-neurotypes-office/id1729838438) that might be a helpful alternative if someone likes the interview but is sensitive to the video? The podcast has the same content but is audio only.
Sounds like a you problem
Self-soothing. He's fine. 😊
@@jenniferray9850 lol definitely cute for me ❤ you described it VERY well.
Sam, all the rocking you're doing is very distracting.
I have SPD and ADHD as well. I can relate to everything LC has said so far. I stopped for a break at the part where he talks about counselors and getting diagnoses.
In my experience I only would go in for therapy/psychiatry when I'm very depressed or stressed out over something. I've been seeing counselors on and off since 2009. They've never actually helped me directly, everything they suggest and tell me are things I already know from doing my own research. I use them more as a way of speaking out loud so I can better process how I'm feeling and how to move forward. A lot of time they simply have no idea how to help me since I'm so differently wired compared to "normal" people.
I absolutely do not want any friends, I feel literally no connection with people, I only talk to people to share and exchange information. I have more fun and feel my best when I'm alone. I'm only close to my immediate relatives (parents and sister). BUT, I often times wonder if all of this would just go away if I truly let go of my ego and embraced wanting to deeply care and connect with other people. With friends it seems very unlikely, but with romantic partners I have become obsessed with them. Mostly because I crave physical intimacy ONLY. Which makes me now think that it would be impossible to truly connect with someone.
Thank you very much for your comment, it was genuinely interesting to read -- in particular, the part about therapy being something you occasionally seek purely for the processing thoughts out loud component rather than learning something new from therapists directly. No pressure to reply, but I would be extremely interested to learn what (if anything) therapists could do to potentially be more directly helpful in your opinion?
Same socializing is just meh.. for me but I also get energy spikes despite being stoic cold like, I took the test recently and I scored high on it, I'm very detached on my head 24/7 which is something I'm trying to overcome and learn more about empathy to better understand socializing and this concept of humanity. Is good knowing I'm not alone. I loved this video is very empowering with those who have schizoid. ❤