Proposing AFTER Deciding to get Married? 🤔 Korea & Canada | Marriage Chat
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 พ.ย. 2024
- #proposal #marriage #wedding
Marriage culture is very different when it comes to Korea and Canada. It's been exactly 5 years since we got engaged, so we thought we'd have a casual 'marriage chat' this week with you all :) What is engagement culture like where you live?
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(In English):
Kyuho Lee #205, 8, Hwajung-ro 104beon-gil, Deogyang-gu, Goyang-si, Gyeonggi-do Postal code 10497, KOREA
(In Korean): 이규호 경기도 고양시 덕양구 화중로104번길 8, 205호 우편번호 10497
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Please let us know what you think about these types of chatty videos. Don't forget to like and subscribe! 한글 자막이 안나올 경우 설정에서 자막 cc를 켜주세요^^ 아 그리고 이렇게 대화하는 영상은 어떻게 생각하시는지 알려주세요^^ 더 다양한 영상을 저희 채널에서 확인부탁드리며 구독과 좋아요 감사합니다~
We really liked it
I love these chatty videos. It makes me feel like I know you even better.
This was actually super interesting!
2hearts1seoul I love these kind of videos! It‘s a rare thing to have laid back but yet thought through conversations on TH-cam. You really make me think about culture differently and critically. Keep that content coming! Stay who you are and do what you love! That‘s what makes the best videos (and best lifes 😉) und please don‘t try to just please the community.
I love your videos and am watching every one of them on sundays for 3,5 years straight now. Never skipped one of your videos 😎🤓
Greetings from Berlin, Germany 👋
I completely agree with you Sarah.. One year of dating is really not enough to get to know someone and know if you wanna get married. That's way too soon.
저는 결혼은 온전한 본인의 선택이어야 한다고 생각해요. 결혼은 인생에서 매우 큰 부분이고 큰 터닝포인트가 된다고 생각하거든요. 그런 큰 결정을 다른 사람에 의해서 내려야 하는 건 바람직하지 않다고 생각해요. 아무리 부모님이라고 할지라도 말이에요!(물론 조언은 해주실 수 있겠지만!) 부모님은 물론 저보다 경험이 많으시고 지혜로우시지만 항상 옳은 결정을 내리시진 않잖아요. 잘못된 결정으로 부모님을 원망하고 싶진 않아요😂
I truly love the sit down and talk videos that you guys do. My husband even sat down and watched after hearing it from down the hallway and we started talking. I really enjoy these sit down and answer videos so much. Oh and my husband laughed at the bug because we have the same agreement.
I'm so happy u talked about proposals. My Korean bf and I just booked our wedding. I met his parents in feb 2019 so i guess that was our engagement. We talked about getting married before that. I knew he was the one I wanted to marry about a year into the relationship. We have been together over 3 years now. I asked him to propose sometime before the wedding. I just want him to officially ask me. Actually we just talked about the wedding cake cutting tradition in Canada lol. At the wedding hall that we booked they will give us a wedding cake for a bridal party like 1hr before the wedding lol i thoughy it was strange but maybe a korean thing but my bf said he thought it was a western thing haha. Did ur wedding venue offer that too? Thanks for these videos. They have been so informative and helpful. As a Canadian living in Korea and getting married to a Korean, theres a lot of cultural differences that pop up and it's nice to have ur videos handy to help explain our cultural differences. Thanks!
Oh yeah, as I read the title I knew exactly what was the starting point of this video! It is about the former T-ARA member (a girl group from the late 2000s) who said on tv that her fiancé and baby daddy hasn't proposed yet. I had the exact same thoughts Sarah! I was like "well do you even need a proposal at this point?!", I find this cultural difference fascinating.
Where I'm from, proposals are not really popular with the young generation and not "required" by parents... Indeed, meeting the family in the first months of dating is common. There are less and less weddings and more cohabitation and "civil unions". Nowadays, having a kid together is considered a bigger commitment than marriage. Fewer divorces but messy split-ups. That's pretty much how it is around here!
Yesss, thank you, that’s exactly the article I was referring to! I know that group, but I didn’t know that particular member 💦 I found it really fascinating as well~
@@2hearts1seoul Yeah, she was only in the group for a year I think before she left, that's why you don't really know her!
Well personally for me, I want a little bit of everything. I want both of us to talk about the decision together, BUT I want to be surprised when the proposal happens. I want both sides of the family to meet and (hopefully) get along, BUT ultimately the decision is ours and if they happen to approve than its a bonus.
I''m Korean-American. I married a Korean last June. My parents live in Texas, as well as all of my relatives being in America. This meant that my mom and my wife's mom and wife were all in cahoots in organizing the wedding without me knowing. The wedding date was really dependent on the venue open dates, my relatives and family in America being able to attend (during the summer since they have kids). Pretty much, 90% of it was done without me.
Perhaps a year or so before we got married, the wedding date was set before an official proposal. I didn't propose to her until 1 month before our wedding while on vacation in Japan. It was hard for me to find places and times to "surprise" her with my proposal.
My mom/parents not being able to come to Korea more often than 1-2 times a year also dictated how/when we organized the wedding. If I were Korean-Korean with family all in Korea, maybe I would have proposed to her prior to organizing the logistics.
My husband and I had a VERY similar experience when it came to our wedding. We're from America, but a lot of our relatives are based in India. My husband still did a "surprise" proposal about 2 months before our wedding, and I was SO touched.
When family is involved and a wedding date is set for reasons somewhat out of the control of the couple, it can easily start feeling like your wedding plans are for the benefit of others (because the date/venue/time of the wedding is dependent on when your family can travel/take time off/etc). The proposal just was a beautiful reminder that our marriage is about us and our love for each other, even in the midst of all the wedding planning. I'm sure that your wife felt the same way, too!
한국에선 남자친구나 여자친구 부모님을 뵙는건 말씀하신것처럼 관계가 좀 더 진지한 관계가 전재 되었을때가 더 많은 것 같아요 그렇지 않은 경우도 물론 있긴 하지만요. 결혼 날짜를 잡는거보다 청혼이 늦어지는게 흔한편인데 저도 그건 순서가 잘못되지 않았나 싶을때가 많아요.
Kyuho being scared of the spider was so cute and the fact that he owns it makes it even better. Sarah to the rescue was so adorable. I’m terrified of all creepy crawlers - so I can relate.
Hahaha I love how Sarah protects Kyuho from all the bugs :) You two are adorable
random, but just wanted to say that you two have one of the most wholesome channels on youtube (: i look forward to your vlogs every week and sometimes just rewatch old videos after a long day of work. always love watching you guys interact and just chatting about various things. thanks for being awesome!!! your fans appreciate it ^_^
Ohhh, thank you so much 🥰 What a lovely comment! That really means a lot 🙏
Yay I love these chit chat videos. It's nice to see what's on your minds on a daily basis haha.
Here in Germany it's just the decision of the couple who wants to get married. I still remember how shocked I was when my brother told us he is getting married. We always wished he would get married to his girlfriend but he was so stubborn and didn't want to get married at all because it's like 'bonding' him to someone. But now he is getting married and I couldn't be happier. But yeah he decided to marry her alone and didn't even tell us about his plans of proposing.
As for myself I wouldn't mind having the same marriage culture as in Korea. My moms opinion matters a lot to me so it would be nice to get an official approval from her. ^^
Also if a white rabbit would run in a park here I would assume it ran away from home HAHA
Hello from Japan! I enjoyed the video so much. I got married last August after about one and half year dating. It really depends on every couple, but he proposed me after we decided our wedding ceremony day lol It’s like we decided getting married and introduced each other to our parents, but he had missed the important part (propose) 😂 I had thought I never had an experience of propose in my life and I made myself think it’s ok, but I was super happy when he proposed me finally! 💘
Yay!!! Happy Sunday y’all!!!
For my parents (Irish person here so I can't speak on behalf of other people/cultures), they had been dating for four years I believe. They had been talking about marriage for ages, but neither were fussed to actually do it... And I don't blame them, they knew they wanted to be together forever but the stress behind planning a wedding threw them off. That was until one day my mom gave him a three hats. Inside each hat were dates, months and years all written out on a piece of paper. My dad had to pick out a year, month and a date. This was in October 1998 by the time this happened, according to my mom.
My dad then pulled out the date 21st of January, 1999 - only a couple of months away! But they went along with it. They had their proposal, had a wedding ceremony and honeymoon. It was very small but it was what they would have wanted anyway; they married in a registry office and 40 people saw them and they had a meal in a hotel. So there was very little surprise... only a lot of stress! 😂😂😂
Omggg, that is so neat!! What a sweet story-love that! 😍
Totally off-topic but you always have the best picnic snacks! 😋 Enjoying the mix of out and about vlogs with casual chit chat vlogs lately, it's interesting to learn about all these cultural differences ~
Haha, that’s our joy-enjoying tasty snacks outside when the weather is fab 😁
And thank you so much! We’ve really been enjoying mixing vlogs with chats lately ☺️
I got engaged last year in Nov but we don't have any wedding plans yet because we like being engaged to each other :) It kinda boggles my mind as well how surprise proposals work. For me, I picked out my favourite ring design online. We custom made and ordered it and it arrived in the mail. He proposed immediately in the living room with the ring and I love that I had so much control over what the ring I'd wear for the rest of my life looked like. We knew that we would be together till we grow old anyways. So engaged or not, married or not, we're happy. I mean I still teared up when he proposed :') I think the surprise factor does not play any part for me.
주말의 마무리는 규호님과 세라님의 영상을 보고 마무리 합니다.
영상 너무 잘봤습니다.
항상 감사합니다 즐거운 한 주 보내세요 😍
I like this kind of chat which makes is talking about differences from different cultures. It makes me interested all the time. Thank you for good video, and I hope see your videos like this one.
Ohh, thank you very much for the kind comment ☺️ We’re so glad you enjoyed this topic~
I was waiting for the video so my morning is complete ^ ^, love your videos so much
I am Korean and so is my gf. I introduced her to my family dating less than a few months and I did it to show both my parents and my gf that I care. Not for marriage. For me it differs greatly. Showing my parents who I love is care, its not a necessary process for me to introduce my parents in order to marry a person. If i love someone and my parents love me, they do have a say but they dont make the decisions. Parents support an action not control.
And i think Kyuho is exaggerating a bit. Maybe it is due to the fact that he is married to a foreigner. But i feel that a lot of his comments were either old fashion or portrays korea like a strict parent to child control.
When I proposed to my wife we were still in a long distance relationship at the time (I was in the UK and she was in Japan). And eventually after a few years of this I secretly flew to Hokkaido to ask for her parents permission to marry her before I proceeded onto Tokyo where I proposed to her :)
We have been talking about marriage with my boyfriend lately.
He is Korean and I m Ukrainian/Greek
He better ask my parents but not set any days and do it without me knowing and then surprise me 😊😂
Russian/Cypriot here, and I'm in the same situation. I'm trying to figure out how we're gonna do that with my parents so far away :/
Spanish/Latin culture is very similar to Korean. Families are very involved in everything and marrige is very much seen as "you don't only marry your partner, but you marry the whole family". And yes, asking permission to propose or ask for their hand in marriage is still very much embedded and respected, of course, times are changing and there's more of a liberal and openness about things but the majority, at least I would think, is still very much traditional
The introducing to parents is same in India. You introduce your partner if you're serious and looking into getting into a marriage. Also arranged marriages definately also an Indian thing but lot more rare among youngsters. But the marriage is very family oriented and not just the couple lol the families need to get along and like each other too.
I love chatty videos!! I’m from Singapore and this is personally what I feel happens most of the time; couples usually date during schooling years and apply for housing really early (it’s cheaper when your combined income is below $5k, the government gives more grants), therefore most couples discuss marriage and getting a house even before the proposal because it’s just more practical. Also, you need to wait for 2-3 years for the entire housing building to be built (for those looking for newly built houses) so couples usually apply for the ballot for housing before even thinking about the proposal. There’s a saying that in Singapore, instead of asking “will you marry me?”, guys will usually ask “wanna get a BTO (built-to-order house)?” LOL. Usually when someone proposes, they would already know that they will be getting married, so the proposal won’t be a surprise, it would usually be the timing of the proposal that is a surprise!
For me, we knew we would get married eventually and looked at housing first. As the wedding + house would only happen 2-3 years after applying for housing, i expected the proposal to happen around that time too! BUT MY BF PROPOSED LIKE A MONTH AFTER WE APPLIED FOR THE HOUSE. I was shocked cause I didn’t expect him to propose so soon LOL. But it was a happy surprise 😂😂😂
omg i got so excited with the bunnies, they're so freaking cuuuute 😍😍😍😍😍
I think that the statement "you don't just marry the person, you marry their whole family" is universally valid, no matter the engagement/marrying practices
I wonder if for Koreans the part of "getting permission from your parents" is just a cultural thing or if it is also an administrative step.. like them having to sign papers or something
Love your lovely video truly enjoyed this, continue to live a beautiful life🙏
In Singapore, most couples will have to apply flats from the gov housing board and they will have to register their marriage before collecting the keys or within 3 months after collected the keys. The process from applying to completion of building will take around 2 to 4 years so some couple might just apply for a flat 6 months into their relationship. After confirmation of getting one unit, the couple will need to pay for 10% of the deposit so if the couple break up then they will have to forfeit the 10%. The proposal will usually happens a few months to a year before collecting the keys so the ladies usually will roughly know when is the "surprise". It is because the couple will need time to plan for their wedding and so on.
As for me, I got my flat after three applications (one and half years) and I am just like Sarah's parents. We plan to just do a simple ROM before collecting the keys.
I love hearing your experiences and thoughts! You two are such a lovely couple & inspiration!
Hi, my wife and I got married after seeing eachother for about a month, we celebrated out 20th wedding anniversary last February. My parents who are in their 70's, who were born and raised in Korea, went against the tradition of arranged marriages and met and each other and have been married so far for more than 50 years. My wife is an Irish German American and I am a Korean American, and we in the states.
I live in Sweden and here most people just propose as they want. I don't know anyone who asked for parents approval before 🤗
It's funny the diffrent culture, i'm not married but have been with my partner for over 25 years
(American) my parents just mutually decided to get married too and my mother has ALWAYS regretted not getting that surprise proposal!! She’s been telling me from an early age to make sure I get my real proposal lol
I LOVE your relaxing chitchat
Thank you so much! 😭❤️ We really love doing these sit down chats sometimes!
Ps. We decided to do the western wedding cake tradition after the wedding just with my family. Lol my bf wasn't crazy about the idea of me putting wedding cake on his face haha but eventually he agreed
I’m American and grew up in a very conservative household. I would never dream of getting engaged without my parent’s blessing. It was sort of just expected that their permission would be asked beforehand. But it’s also very interesting because they were really reluctant to give their blessing to my husband and I. If they had refused, I do think I would have gotten married regardless, although that would have been very challenging on our relationship.
Great video, but then again all your videos are great 😍
I think I would want to have had some general conversation with my boyfriend (doesn't have to be a sit-down convo) about the idea of getting married first, because if they suddenly propose to me in front of friends, family, or even strangers and I wasn't on the same page, Id feel very uncomfortable if I had to say no because I wasn't ready... But if they are Japanese, it would be a good idea if they got approval from their family first, because if they don't want me in their family then dont want to go through the whole process only to be unliked/unapproved by my spouse's family you know?
In Latin Culture it is just like Korea, you don't only marry the person, you marry the whole family.Although it is more traditional for the man to go to the girl's parents and ask for her hand in marriage 😂😂😂😂
hi, I'm from south america. in my country that's considered a bit old fashioned. is it common practice in your country?
@@veritush I'm from Cuba and depending on your family, it is still expected for the guy to talk to the parents for your hand in marriage. It is seen as a nice and honorable thing. And yeah it is old fashion for sure
In India too when I take my partner too my parents ..I was nervous but It's more like how my parents think about her and then I went to hers and kinda like knowing each other's family tell them that we will take your permission first😁 and sarah was soo right it's marrying to each others family too .... Indian culture and korean marrying culture is kinda similar ....
벌써 그때부터 5주년이라니ㅠㅠㅠㅠ시간 빠루당ㅠ
What a good timing! I just had this discussion with my Korean boyfriend about this topic and I couldn't believe him about the proposing thing 😅 Then I also saw that article you talked about and I was like: oh... So my boyfriend was actually right about the proposing culture in Korea 😂 I am from Hungary and there proposal is usually way before the marriage, its kind of like "yeah we are serious now and would like to marry in the future". So I kinda wish to have a little surprise proposal but I think I have to forget it haha
Loved this conversation! 🙂
I married decades ago, but do remember that it was understood that my boyfriend would ask both parents for their permission to marry me. Although my father said yes, we both knew that he meant no (lol).
Traditionally, In my culture, in the Philippines we call it “Pamamanhikan” and it is a Filipino tradition where a man together with his family will go to a woman's family home to formally seek the blessing of parents before getting married..
Also, back in the days, the man will even sing outside of the woman’s house to get her attention and “heart”; this is called “courting” before dating or becoming boyfriend/girlfriend.
I love your videos guys!
Thank you! 🥰
I'm Dominican Italian, and I completely understand the culture. It is so relatable on so many levels. Understand meeting the family, HOWEVER I don't agree that the family should be involved in every aspect. Perhaps that comes with living in Miami for so long. Like let me live haha
We've been together for 4 years and we already both casually know we'll marry each other, but I'll probably come up with some creative way to propose anyway just because you have to! 😋
The bunny bit at the end 😭😭😭❤❤❤ why do you both bring my 4 enneagran self down to a calm person after watching? Lol
I think that finding out what your parents think and what their parents think is something that should be done but in the end culture or not you are the ones marrying and there should be a "moment" where the question is asked b4 there is a wedding planned.
I met my husband when I was 16 and he was 17. We actually met over the phone. I was at my moms, friends kid birthday party and was bored out of my mind so I went into another room and called a friend of mine. At that time he had a friend over. While talking to my friend his friend was laughing in the background of the phone and ask to talk to him. I wanted to find out what was so funny. Who knew we would talk for 2hrs in the phone. I asked if he would like to meet up and that same day he drove to my house and the rest is history! Lol
My senior year in high school a month before I graduated, he proposed to me. When he proposed to me, little did we know I was pregnant. My parents were excited and already consider him as family. His parents liked me but I feel they had reservations on us being so young. Which they had every rights to be nervous.
I can say that even if we had decided to get married and started making plans, I still would like a proposal. I think it’s just some girls like the moment of being ask to be that persons one and only for life. There are some girls that just don’t give two hoots about all the fuss.
Now for my boys, when they were younger dating I wanted to know about their girlfriends and her family. Now that they are older my oldest being 24. I personally don’t want to meet them till they are serious. Because that last girlfriend I met, I got close to her and blink of an eye they broke up. Left me as the mom in a very awkward position. I liked her but at the same time they had not such a clean break up. I felt like I was also breaking off a relationship with the girl due to them breaking up. For me as my sons mother I couldn’t make him uncomfortable and continue a bond with her. So I told him for now on. If he’s not planning on marriage don’t being his girlfriends around.🤣🤣 feel liken being selfish and protecting my own feeling in this situation. It’s hard to get emotionally attached to the girlfriends and her family and then later they break up. Now I have to say I still talk to my younger sons girlfriend. Because their break wasn’t a bad break. But she was a year older and she went into the military and he was finishing up his last year in high school. So their path went in different directions. While she’s being trained in the military being an adult. My son was still in high school playing sports and preparing for college. We still talk here and there bu let her mom and I are good friends.
Sorry so long.
Love your videos😊💙, it's always interesting to hear someone else's POV on different subjects
#bunnies🐇🥰
Omg!!! Kyuho does try to conscientiously eat a cookie without shedding a crumb!!! Lmao!!! Too cute!!!
I went to that same park when I went to Seoul in September! I went there specially to see the rabbits, and I was so excited to spot two of them！But you guys are so cool, like oh there’s a rabbit over there 😂😆
I am Thai. When I introduced my boyfriend to my parents when we have been dating for 8 months and my dad asked me if this guy is mr. Right and where I will live after getting married. I could not answer that because I told them just to update what’s going on in my life ( I lived aboard that time). It took long time for them to understand the situation. I still not marry him 😂.
PS. We have ‘water lizard’ park in Bangkok, if you are interesting.
That’s so interesting, haha! Not only is there cultural differences I think, but there’s also pretty big generational differences as well when it comes to marriage!
That water lizard park sounds AMAZING 😮
We are from USA but still have and follow our Guatemalan tradition. If you date a boy/girl and it’s exclusive the boy ask the parents permission to date. That’s call “officially dating with parents permission “. Then if the boy wants to get married he brings his parents with him to the girls home to ask her parents for their daughters hand in marriage. Then is the wedding. We still adhere to that tradition even though our family is international.
Honestly, like with your last discussion, I think what you said is less Korea vs. Canada, but more of an Eastern vs. Western culture thing. The emphasis on respecting your family and having your elders approve of your future spouse dates back all the way to Confucianism and its teaching of the family hierarchy and respecting your elders. And China's massive influence during its dynasty eras spread to countries like Japan, Korea, and most of East Asia. So in a sense, marriage culture is very similar across almost all of those regions.
Meanwhile, Western Culture has less of an emphasis on respecting elders and there's no such thing as worshiping your ancestors because there's not really a philosophy similar to Confucianism, though there are still love thy family and honor thy parents in the bible. And like how much of the East Asian culture is influenced by China, so too is Western Culture mostly influenced by Greek/Roman philosophies as well, and therefore different cultural values.
But Westernization since the imperial times when Britain colonized half of the world has been deep-rooted in a lot of cultures as well, including East Asia (specifically Korea). So I wouldn't be surprised if some families in Korea would take a more western approach as well. Again, it's all about history.
새라님... 아직 모르셧구나.. 규호씨 부모님세대는 중매가 흔햇고 그 이전에 할아버지 할머니 세대는 동네에서 부모님이 정해준 상대와 거의 강제로 결혼해야햇엇대요. 1900년대 초중반 까지만해도요. 한국은 결혼을 나 자신의 결정이 아닌 부모가 대부분 상대를 정해주고 따라가는거엿다고해요... 할머니한테 들엇어요. 물론 모든 케이스가 그런건 아니지만 예전 할아버지 할머니세대는 집에서 정해준 사람과 햇어야햇고 이런 문화가 현재까지 결혼 프로세스에서 가족의 허락을 중시하는 원인이 아닌가 싶네요.
이건 제 개인적인 생각입니다만... 사실 어떻게 보면 아직도 그 가부장제가 어느정도는 이어져서 그렇지 않나 싶습니다. 집안의 대를 이어나가야 되고, 집안의 명예를 이어나가야 된다는 개념이 아직도 존재하고 있다고 생각합니다.
In Singapore, most couples will apply for public housing as a first step to marriage, then to proposal. Is funny how this is quite similar to Korea, given Singapore being multi-culture and diverse society.
Ohhh, that’s interesting! I had the same thought initially-Singapore is super multicultural, so I wondered if there were several common ‘engagement processes’~
Another difference I noticed in Korean wedding ritual is marriage photos - groom even picking out the dress together (?!), seeing the bride and photographed together before the wedding and even walking up the isle together.
Yes! Picking out the dress together was a huge shocker for me as well-though I soon really liked that idea, as Kyuho’s fashion opinion is really important to me, lol.
One thing I didn’t go through with however, is the bride sitting in ‘the bride room’ to get photos with everyone before the wedding ceremony starts. I hid until then, because I wanted the ‘big reveal’ 😅
@@2hearts1seoul Good for you!!! Lol. Gotta stick to your guns! You two rock. I'm still so impressed with K's Russian. It's still excellent. Much love to you both ( to you 3, actually).
im rewatching this video so the idk what time
This was such a culture clash I had between me and my korean boyfriend. I’m American so I wanted him to simply just eat dinner with my family while they were visiting and he was acting like it was the biggest deal. My parents felt It was extremely important that they met him, but he thought i was like trying to make it super serious??? It was weird to figure out what to do
I'm in the US and was raised amongst the mostly liberal. Pretty much everyone l know, friends and family, has the same story. Together for years and years, around 4 to 10. Live together, in no rush, but have an understanding that they will get married "someday". Everyone already thinks of them as a married couple. The basic idea is that they will get married in the future when they are ready to start a family. So marriage becomes equated with kids. Then at some point they start discussing how old they are (and how they should start trying for kids while they can), or how work is going well, or they buy a house with room for future kids. And around this time the guy proposes. It's still a surprise. She doesn't know it's time, that it's happening now. Or at least she wasn't expecting it that day. He usually has a ring and plans something fun or poetic. She tends to cry. But I only know one couple like this that still got married even though they don't plan on having kids, and for them the timing was based on her finishing her masters degree. The point is they live like they are married without getting married until some sort of milestone. Since it's not about their families, or sleeping together, or living together they have to pick another reason to get married. And that reason tends to be children or home buying, something they have jointly that being married will make easier.
Ahh! Always love your videos! I guess it depends. Here in the US, usually the proposals are a surprise? But I think usually the guy asks permission first - without the girlfriend knowing? That was the case for me. My husband told his parents he wanted to marry me and then went to meet my mom and 2 brothers and asked them for permission to marry me. In fact he asked my oldest brother first, followed by my 2nd brother and then my mom. I felt bad too - he asked me how I felt about couples getting engaged during Valentines Day and I said that it was the cheesiest Hallmark card holiday ever and it’s ridiculous.. not knowing he was going to propose that day 🤭🤣🤣🤣.
Hahahahah, I love your honesty!! 😂 Did he scrap the Valentines Day proposal??
2hearts1seoul nope he still did it lol!!!
I can relate to both from the Canadian and Asian dating and meeting the family point of view. Being Vietnamese and raised in a traditional family and also raised in a Canadian culture at a very young age I can see from both side. I have dated Caucasian girls at a young age back in the days and they would be okay to bring me to their house and meet their family without issues. But for me I didn’t bring any girls home until I got serious knowing that’s the expectation 😂.
To answer to your question: I prefer the Western tradition better. Parents are there of course to support their children’s decision but shouldn’t in anyway interfere in their kid’s decision.
Btw I have been watching several international couple vlogs... I think yours is very mature and interesting and something I can relate to cause of Sarah’s Canadian background lol. Keep up the good work guys.
Ohhh, loved hearing about your personal experiences! And thanks so much for the kind words-that means a lot coming from a fellow Canadian 😊
Omd, you guys got married on my birthday! haha, such a fun fact to keep in mind! Also 9th of may is European day :)
I enjoy this video interested topic about proposal. Have a great week guys from PA
My bf who is korean and I are long distance. We were together before he entered his military service, it was really hard because i live in the states and he couldn't contact much during his service. After he was discharged he work for a few months and flew over here to visit me for the first time. He only able to stay for a week and a half cause of expenses. Out of the blue near the end of his stay he asked would I marry him. 2.5 yrs later after he visited, him and I are still dating 😂. We didn't marry yet because we are still young (early 20's), timing isn't right atm since my family is strict, and im currently in college. But the idea of being together is still in our minds. I was also able to visit for a month & meet his family, they are very kind ^^ and we definitely got to know each more during my stay there 😂 we argued a bit lmao.
In China，proposal thing is kind of same，in younger generation，couples do proposal but its more like a progression，one of my friends literally proposal one day before they got their registration.
That is definitely a very different culture from the West. Is it the law you have to get Korean parents permission, or just a culture thing that if you didn't do it, you'd be disowned or in HUGE trouble?
I'm totally the same as you Sarah, proposal first please. I just can't wrap my head around already having set a marriage date, and then proposing. Makes the proposal moment kind of irrelevant TBH, esp. if the marriage date is set. Part of getting engaged is to figure out the marriage date, together after the proposal.
We have a zillion dates too, get together date, proposal date, legal wedding date (at the courthouse) and the big wedding date with everyone. Don't feel bad, we both forget like all of them besides the big wedding date haha
Oh yeah - sidebar - how did Kyuho survive the military being afraid of bugs/insects? Isn't that like SERE training 101? Haha
I don't know how similar or different Mexico is from Canada, but I think the general consensus here is that you give your children all your values and life skills while you're raising them, but there's a point in which you have to stand back and watch them make their own decisions, even if you don't necessarily like them. Of course, all families are different.
For me, every time I make a joke to my mom about something I might do she tells me "I already raised you and now you are your own woman. You can make your own choices now, you know what you're doing". Marriage is just one of those things. Whoever I decide to marry, wherever on Earth, my mom will stand by my side. If she doesn't like it she can always give me her opinions, but I don't think here it's as normalized to have your family have such weight on your life that way. It's not only not normalized, but not okay.
But again, some families are more conservatives than others.
I’m come a Vietnamese background . II was raise in the US since two. I have a twin brother. His marriage was asking his ex wife to marry him and they got married. With me my parent say it time for you the get marry and took me back home to Vietnam. Then I choose from 27 young women. Then my parent talk to her parent and agreed and got married. I think it was a modern pre arrangements married.
I think that these days people rarely do "surprise" proposals. From all the couples I've personally known, my own wishes, and what I've heard recently, typically the two individuals agree they're looking to marry each other, and then the men or women think of a creative way to make it an "official" proposal. I feel that this is a better way to go about it, as a couple who hasn't had a serious conversation about their future and marriage or a decision not to marry is probably not in the place to make those kinds of decisions anyways.
Tehe, I never noticed the way Sara says “bag”. Relatable!
I have 2 sons, my eldest is 3 and half years old, and my youngest is 3 months, my fiance proposed when our first son was 2, we got pregnant again shortly after the proposal lol, and we are now getting married in 2-3 weeks because my fiance is joining the American Air Force. There was no pressure from either family to get married (he is filipino, and I am Puerto Rican) and now that we are getting married so quickly and simply (court house wedding) our families are stunned 😂😂😂
Some people in Brazil don't even propose, one of my friends just got married, Her boyfriend was like "I wanna get married" and then they just set a day and got married, just like that. My father also didn't propose to my mom. Honestly, I think it's better when there is a proposal, cause it feels more real (for me), like "Oh my God, I'm officially dating or officially engaged" kkkk
Oh wow! That is pretty fast! 😂
@@2hearts1seoul I also think that they got married really fast 😅😅 they were dating for just 5 months, by the way, I love when you reply my comments ^^
Yeeyy new videooo 😍😍
So what are the cookies that grandmas would like? I love cookies, usually old fashioned ones, and im a grandma😉
4:41 Checkmate! 😄❤️
I am a very anxious when I travel as well! I always have to take 1 tab of valerian root. Otherwise my hands keep shaking.
Ohhhh, I’ve never heard of this but should look into it 😮
밥-(LC,아키카드 챙겨나가기)토익숙제-토익LC-(보강)-점심-융합전공서류제출-앰프찾기-컴터학원
My husband and I were together for 8 yrs and one day we were on a patio drinking beers with our friends when he asked me if I wanted to get married....I softly said "okayyyy" and our friends cheered! This March we will be married 9 yrs!! I'm Canadian and my husband is Dutch :0
I'm Vietnamese born in Australia and my husband is Vietnamese aswell but our family meet before we got engaged and kind of set terms on what will happen and what my husband could offer me if we got married.
I didn't get the, on one bended knee proposal. We just went to choose a ring together and that was it.
I would have love a movie proposal. Oh well
I always wanted to propose to my wife. That never happened 😂 One day my girlfriend/wife now, came and told me her mom said we are getting engaged. I’m like “ what?” This after we only been dating for only one year 😳😂So I’m like, ok. But I really wanted to do the proposal thing. That’s my story, but a short version ✌️✌️
아직 한국에서 어른 세대(기성세대)들은 보수적이신 면이 있는 것 같아요 사귀는 애인끼리 여행가는거도 허락 안하시고, 연애하는 날부터 통금이 있기도 하죠 연애만 해도 그렇게 보수적이니 결혼에 있어서는 더욱 진지하게 미래 계획, 재산 등 너무 보수적이고 현실적인것만 생각하세요 그러니 어쩔수없이 애인들도 현실적인 준비를 모두 마친 후에 세레모니 식으로 프러포즈를 하는것 같아요
My boys are scared of insects too. I'm the bug killer for them. Lol. I hope one day they will find a lady to kill bugs for them lol.
Hahah, glad to know I’m not the only one with that duty 😂
I am thinking that Sarah doesn’t kill the bugs but gets them out of harms way or doing harm. Would that be right? I and my daughter are like that.
Ahhh I saw you guys Wednesday (I think) in Gangnam! Too shy to say hi but wanted to say here that you both looked really really good ^^
Ohhh, you definitely should have said hi! Please do so next time you see us! ☺️❤️
I think I’d want my future fiancé to ask my parent’s permission first then propose to me. I’m Korean but I’ve been living around Asia for long time. So those culture process don’t bother me. Although my parents are very traditional, they told me they do not care how I’d get married. What matters is how much the guy loves me. Personally I prefer the proposal first. Then we have a family dinner. By the way, My sister brings her boyfriend all the time even before thinking of marrying him. So I guess everybody has different ways on deciding how to get married
In my culture (zimbabwe) a traditional engagement would be , me taking my boyfriend to my father's sister (my parents cannot see my boyfriend before he pays the bride price). My father's sister would then tell my mother, who will then tell my father 🤣, that someone intends to marry me.
Pple now do the modern engagements but just for social media and friends mostly. Our parents generally dont acknowledge it until the traditional steps are followed. So naturally the true engagement only comes after setting a date to meet the girl's side of the family, anything else is just jokes
My fiancé is korean and after living together for around 2 years we knew we were in it for the long run. I had met his parents once on our first trip to korea together and kind of roughly brought up the idea of marriage to them (“unofficially” asking). After another 7ish months we went back to korea and he proposed to me under a massive cherry blossom tree with his sister and mum close by. I was surprised because I was expecting to bow etc as his parents are quite traditional, but turns out they just expected it 😂 we’re now set to get married July next year in Australia and it’ll be his families first time coming here. We’re all very excited... except for my wallet 😂😂😅
Oh, I love those butter ring cookies... and those peanut cookies with similar packaging. Guess that makes me a grandma! :P
I’m American and my boyfriend and I live in Korea so yes I agree our expectations are a little different lol
I’ve always grown up with the expectation of a surprise proposal but it doesn’t sound like I’m gonna get that if we decided to marry ahahaha
@ 9:57 . The cookie crumb will feed the bunneh!!! 😂🍪🐰
Omg lol, I’m sure one of them will find it 😂
K-man did it Western style LOL. Sarah, we all know he thought you were 'the one' on day one. 😂 Actually, in another recent marriage (Woot!) Kangnam announced marriage plans and started plans months ago and did the proposal months later (via pedicure). They married 10/12/19.
At least throughout my whole family and people I know around me, the man would ask his soon to be wife's father for their hand in marriage and after they have the fathers blessing then he would propose.
좋은 영상 저는 오늘 아침에 남친과 헤어졌어요
슬퍼지만 규호와 세라가 잘 지내길 바래요
아 정말 힘내시길 바랄게요ㅠㅠ
I saw this couple on the yangjae crosswalk. They looked so cool. Both are much taller than i expected. I felt like i saw celebs.. ^^
Ohhh, hello~! We were going for a walk around that area yesterday evening-I think we were going to get ice cream at the McDonalds there 😅 Ahh~ thank you so much for the lovely comment ☺️
보통 한국에서 결혼이라고 하면 개인과 개인이 만나서 가정을 이루는게 아닌 집안과 집안이 만나서 또 다른 가정을 이룬다는 개념이 강한 거 같습니다. 그러다보니 결혼을 하기전에 양가부모님의 허락을 받아야 된다는 게 매우 중요하다고 생각하게 되는 것이고요. 많이 그런 추세가 사라진다고는 하지만 그래도 아직까지는 서로 좋아하지만 양가부모님들의 반대로 결혼까지 못 이어진 커플들도 많고, 결혼을 하더라도 양가의 갈등때문에 힘들어하는 부부들도 많은거 같습니다.