You do a beautiful job of talking through really complex and difficult subjects. You should be proud of the positive impact you’re having on other people, and you’re a wonderful example of how to turn pain into something beautiful 💙
I unexpectedly lost my wife of 20 years 7 weeks ago. This grief stuff really sucks, never had to deal with it before other than lost pets. I'm out from under the initial shock of finding her like that, on to the realization of loneliness (never been lonely before either). The well wishers and condolence people disappeared after the first 3 weeks, I'm glad of that but felt bad for my wife that their lives went back to normal so quickly. I intellectually understood that but the stupid emotions are slow to keep up. We have a semi verbal autistic son that keeps me focused and functional. This isn't a journey that I had ever envisioned. Still trying to find some light on the horizon. Just watching vids like this to try to make sense out of everything.
i am so, so sorry for your loss and i hope that you are okay. losing somebody like that brings pain that is almost unimaginable, and i know i am a random person you've never met but if you ever need to vent, feel free to just come back to this comment and reply to it. wishing you all the best right now ❤
I lost my husband of 33 years 1 year ago today.. He had Pancreatic cancer that spread to his liver. The illness was short (less than 5 months) Thankfully. We DID have the time to say everything that needed to be said..and we had all his affairs in order. I've found an inner strength that I did NOT know I had in me. 1 year later, I've met someone new..who has also been through the loss of a spouse. I had NO idea that this juncture of my life could be as happy as it is. My husband made me promise that I would NOT stay alone... I'm glad I listened to him!!!
Thank you for this video ❤️ I've been following Daniel's journey (and some others as well) about 4 years before my mom was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer (July 2021) and it has literally changed my life and outlook on it. It has helped me prioritize my mom and step back and do and say things that I wanted to cherish and not do/say things that would eat my soul from regret. Her journey was short (good 6 months) and in my eyes it was the best possible "goodbye" I could have with her. All the time I was thinking how I wanted to remember this time with her and make sure I have no regrets. The only bitter thoughts that comes with that journey is that taking about death and dying was not allowed. I understand her thought process "if I don't talk about it, I won't "attract" it", but it would help with my grief. I somehow got all that from someone who went through this horrible disease (in a fb group, unfortunately he also passed away and it was all like a flashback for my mom at that time) and in a dream I had of my mom after her passing where she was in a hospital and she said "you know, I'm in paliative unit now" and I replied "I know, mama, you've been here before" (she was there when she was going for radiation before) and she stopped, put a hand on my shoulder, looked me dead in the eyes and said "but this time it's different". I can still vividly remember that dream. It's like she came in my dreams to fix that bitter feelings. It's been 9 months since her passing and I still break down and cry like a baby sometimes. You know the saying "time heals all wounds"? It doesn't. We just learn to live with the pain that a loss like that brings. Even though I knew my mom would pass away and we (family) were preparing for that, even though I've lost friends and some family members (great grandpa, grandpa and two grandmas) in the past, it still hit me like a brick in the head when I've realised that when she was gone, she was gone for good. I can feel her around occasionally, but it's totally different.
Thank you, Becca. I know your story and you are and we’re so brave. I lost my guy 2 1/2 years ago and I am still grieving. I am 70 now and he was 78. I had cancer 6 years ago but luckily am in remission. We thought then, he would outlive me, but it didn’t work that way. Even at our ages, I never thought of losing him. He was a kind, good man. We had two dogs, and he would take them for a car ride every day. The car door closed and hit the side of his head. His brain bled and he suffered for two years. At the end he stopped eating, and passed away at home. I still miss him, our home, our beautiful yard, and our life. I am 70 and there will not be another love in my life. I am living with my daughter now and I am very grateful to my kids. They are my rock now, but I miss my life.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Please keep us posted to how you are - and your vulnerability is an inspiration - I am just sorry I am only replying to this now. 🧡
I lost a girlfriend 3 years ago today, and I feel empty, i hate who I've become and I hate why it's happened, I'm struggling and even after 3 years I still haven't gotten through it. I miss her, this helped me it helped me let out a cry. Thank you ❤
Now you've made me cry (happy tears). I lost my mother in September, 2021. Not a day goes by that I don't miss her. I've been in counseling, I feel my coping mechanisms are helping, and remembering to give myself grace is key. Thank you for this. Sending big love to you.
David! It was my turn to set you off (you do it to me all the time! We should start keeping score.) please do give yourself time. She would be so proud of you. Thank you for sharing this. 🧡
I lost someone only 6 days ago... A love interest. I've lost friends, family members and pets throughout my life, but this is the first time I lost someone who I had romantic feelings for. It's not often I catch feelings like that for someone. I only knew her a few months as well, but the pain I'm feeling right now resembles the pain I'd feel for someone I knew my whole life. I never got to tell her how I truly felt... She was only 25, 2 years younger than me... I honestly haven't felt pain like this from grief since my best friend went completely insane with psychosis in 2014. He was never the same again after that. He's still in a hospital, they literally can't let him out. He's too far gone. I didn't manage to move forward with that until about 2019. Thank you for this video. It needs more views. It's the most helpful one so far of the videos I've been watching on the topic of grief...
I'm actually crying right now cause your words in this video really touch my heart. The best advice for surviving grief is to give yourself time. You have been through a traumatic experience by losing your loved one. Do not let someone tell you how you should be feeling or that you need to “ get over” this and my personal favorite, just “ let them go”. Everyone’s relationships are different. They have different intensity emotionally. You will not grieve the same way for your parents as you do for your child or spouse who has passed on. There is a difference between grief and depression and what some people call complicated grief. Living life without your loved one is learning a new way to live. It takes time to get comfortable with it. It doesn’t mean you will not have moments of emotional reactions for instance, a place, a song, a smell. You are remembering and that is honoring the one you loved. Sometimes remembering is painful because we confront again, that we are living here on earth without our loved ones. So often we try to fill our lives up with distractions instead of dealing with our feelings. The best way to survive your grief is to lean into it. Feel your loss. It’s your loss, your grief. No one gets over it, we learn to live with our grief. Someone said, and I think this is a beautiful statement: Grief is the final responsibility of loving someone. We remember them and learn, little by little to live without them. We honor our loved ones by living, by going on. Much love Becca ❤️
Of course, one of my favourite internet persons quoted one of my favourite quotes! Thank you so much, always, for your gorgeous comment. They mean the world to me and everyone should read this. Thank you. 🧡
Yes, you are spot on; I know you are helping others more than you realize. Sending hugs back to you. May the love from others help to comfort you too. 💖
@@IamBecca We know how much you care or you wouldn't do these videos. Your life experiences are helping others and feel this has been part of your life plan. I feel, no matter how tough the road, your guided and not alone; it runs In the family. You are works of special deeds.❤ 😉
Grief runs alongside all the other emotions in your life, it’s part of living unfortunately. You do have a beautiful way of expressing things. When my Dad died, I was too young to realise the impact. I tried to block it but I had the most dreadful anxiety and panic attacks. Many years later I wrote him a really honest letter. It was the best thing I did. I have lost quite a few people now, I grieve them, but I also laugh at wonderful memories and see them in all I do.
I'll never forget my experience with grief. Losing my dad in my teenage years. Those months afterwards walking around feeling like a total zombie. Having people say they could see the life taken out of me. It's incredible how it completely changed me as a human being. I look back on the Kurtis I was before losing him and that just isn't me anymore. Some things I miss about that Kurtis but I've also learnt to be alot more compassionate and caring from going through a traumatic experience like that. It's also made me appreciate my friends and family alot more because I know how fickle of a thing life can be
Thank you 🙂 I find your videos a great source of comfort. From our interactions in the comments it makes watching your videos like taking some sound advice from a good friend. You should be immensely proud of the community you have built
My depression this year is the worst I've ever dealt with. It's the second holiday season without my husband. Things in my family have changed drastically and I'm feeling like no one cares. My RA is taking more and more of my independence daily. It was so bad the other night I seriously considered calling my daughter to take me to the hospital so I could check in to the mental health ward. Sorry for venting here. I really don't like dumping my troubles on others. ❤
Never, ever apologise. This is a safe space! I really wish I could help you more than just with words, but you're doing incredibly. Asking for help is the first step. 🧡
I'm so glad to see a video from you, you're so right, we all grieve in our own way and there's no shame in it. Wishing love to you and everyone who has ever been through this, we grieve for different reasons and different things and it helps to remember that ❤️
@@IamBecca thank you for the video and the support that you give! There are times I struggle but it helps to see such good people in the world and realize while we're all unique, we're all together in this. I wish you so much love and joy for the future, I hope you're keeping as well as you can 😊
Today I can't sleep, I'm so anxious, and not feeling good about myself. That's what I'm here to hear your words again. It helps me accept what I'm going through and be gentle to myself.
The word “grief” doesn’t come anywhere close to describing the absolute devastation wrought on a daily basis. I remember being told that if you love someone fighting cancer, you’ll catch a little bit of it too & I discovered this to be a fair assessment of the situation. Not only do you lose a loved one but with that you also lose the future you thought you’d be living. Two years later I still know nothing about grief other than it stalks me like a ghost, waiting to trip me up when I thought the storm had pass…maybe it doesn’t pass or maybe I simply love too hard.
Thank you for this video, so very much. I lost my Dad in June, on Fathers Day of all days. I still find it so hard to accept he's gone. We were very close and I saw him, and Mum, every day. It scares me to think about losing my Mum, which will inevitably happen at some point. I can't do life without my Dad, how on earth will I do it without her too 😔 Grief is just so damn hard xx
What a beautiful and perfect video that i wish everyone could see! 💗💗💜💜 thank you for making this 🙏 I'm grieving the recent loss of a parent and it has stirred up all kinds of emotions including suddenly being afraid of everyone else passing away too (which, as you said, is very normal) - In my experience, having lost family and friends - grief does change and evolve, - from the slicing and devastating blade it starts as and, over time, life grows around this loss that has been implanted in your very body and heart and it becomes part of you more as an imprint of love, and remembrance. Everyone grieves differently but for me, time always helped me feel more connected to the people I lost. I can feel my loved ones around me and guiding me or just in my happy memories. I'm sending all my love to everyone reading this comment who has experienced loss - whether that is a literal death, or another deep loss.
You know your comments always get to me. This is so beautiful, so artistically written. Thank you, on behalf of all of us who have read it. You're marvellous. 🧡
I watched this even though I'm not grieving right now. My Mom passed in February 2021 but she was almost 96 and was very ready to go. I lived with her in her home for almost 10 years. It has been an adjustment. I still have a pile of her things that have been sitting in my dining room for over a year. I hope maybe I'll be able to go through them sometime next year. For now I just want to enjoy the season we are in. Thanks for all you share! 💗
Thank you so much for this insight, I love hearing how things impact people on all different points of life. I hope you had a lovely end to 2022 and that 2023 brings you lightness and happiness. 🧡
Your amazing u help me I have thyroid cancer your video Nd pee,a keep me going. Thank you for share this with us please keep making videos love to you all
Thank you so much for this video, to find it today, the first anniversary of loosing my father really did help. The grief has changed over that time but the lose is still there and sometimes you just need that affirmation that it is still ok to grieve. Thank you again.
You have such a calming way about you. 2022 has been one of the worst years I have been threw. In the last 11 months I lost my 17 year old fur baby, my 2 very best friends, the sewage backed up in my basement and destroyed so much and last Tuesday my car was totaled. Praying for a better 2023... ☹
I lost my only sibling, my little sister in a car accident back in March of this year, she was only 31, tomorrow will be the first of the holiday's without her...
@@IamBecca thanks, I'm surviving, I really try to stay positive because i know thats what she would have wanted, even though i can feel a lonesome cold empty shadow of what was... trying to take over, I hope life is going good for you..
Thank you I don't go anywhere me and my wife used to go because the pain and sadness overwhelmes me it's been a little over a year now and my family says I've changed and every day is a challenge thanks for sharing this.
Awe thank you for this 🥺 I just lost someone very very special to me. And everything you are saying is so true. I wish everyone would watch this video. Thank you ❤
Oh thank you so much for your lovely words - and I am so sorry to hear you have lost someone. I hope you found some comfort here and sending you a massive hug. 🧡
Thank you! I lost my mom to Covid in October 2020, I was finally feeling okay til April 2021. My husband was diagnosed with Metastatic Small Cell Lung Cancer in April 2021. We had been together 35 1/2 years, within four months in August 2021 he lost his battle with Cancer. My heart is broken, I am in grief Counseling, and it has helped tremendously. I miss my husband and my mom every day. Some days it is just so hard. I dread Thanksgiving this Thursday, I will be alone. That’s the hard part being alone.😢
I wish I could give you a hug. Thank you for your vulnerability and if there were words I could give you to help, I would give them to you. Please do let us know how you are getting on. 🧡
it has been a while since ive grieved now...but it comes back sometime...it does not really matter for the feelings towards this vid though..it truly is just weird,how you,a person ive (unfortunately) never met,can project the feelings that ALWAYS hits home,you are bringing things to the table EVERY time you make a vid Becca...you truly mean more and more to me...thank you for being YOU
Thank you Becca...you told me exactly what I needed to hear. I lost my father just over 4 months ago. My hero. Thank you for telling me the truth that grief is something that clings and its about learning what you feel is normal and valid. That reaching out when needed is the best way to find a way through this journey. I heard it gets better with time so much I wanted to scream as I knew this would not go away. Glad to see you again Becca. I have thought about you often.
Thank u for this video. U always have the right words to say and I appreciate it. I lost my aunt in April then 2 mths later my eldest sons grandad (his dads dad) I was still close to him after me and his son split. My aunt was my mums sister who was like a 2nd mum to me and my brothers. We were very close. I lost my dad 17 yrs ago and my mum 3yrs ago. The grieving mixed with my bad depression is very hard but i try my best everyday for my sons.
I am so sorry for your loss I know how yiu you feel my dad died in 2014 from cancer its so hard 😢 I hope you are ok sending you lots of love and hugs xxx thinking of you
2019 i lost my grandad, 2020 i lost my gran and last year i lost my uncle and auntie, and i am only just starting to accept they are gone, i didn't know how to process it properly but the thing that made me slowly move pass the grief was the fact they would probably tell me to stop dwelling on their passings and enjoy life while i can
I understand you sweetheart, I lost my sister suddenly just after 3 months after she knew she has an aggressive cancer she was only 32. She was married just 8 months and she died .I went to my foreign country spent with her 20 days. Everything you saying is correct these feelings exist. She was my only sister. We've never separated even when going to university every morning. I remember during the weekend she put her cloths secretly in my clothes so I will wash them hhhhhh. She was an amazing lady. I love her . I wish you will be always happy Becca. Thank you for your video. Sending love. 🥰🥰🥰. I'm sure you have a beautiful heart. We love you.
Tomorrow would be my father's birthday, he passed away due to cancer... it's been some years now so I know the pain won't go, but the pain is the reflection of how much he matters to me, so I don't want it to go away...as weird as that sounds. Huge virtual hug to everyone, have a nice day.
Oh my gosh I just Put two and two together!!!! That you are Daniel’s wife I watched Many Many videos of his… it’s funny I wondered what happened to you 💕 I hope life is treating you good!!!
Hi Bec, I'm grieving the loss of my partner. He was my world, but the last 5 years of his life, due to his terminal diagnosis, he became so abusive, verbally and emotionally. He destroyed me and my autistic son. I am lost, feel I have no purpose, and no one understands why I stayed with him. I did it because I promised I'd care for him until the end. I won't leave home now, am isolated, and so lonely. And I've lost me. And I can't seem to find me or any motivation to carry on. My sons behavior has been affected but no one cares. I have no family and friends I had left me because they didn't understand the loss I felt. Can you help me please? Thanks for being here xx
Oh Lizzie, I wish I was a trained professional with the words to help. Have you been able to seek any professional advice? Maybe see if there is any support in your local area? You do not have to be alone in this. 🧡
Thanks Bec. I can't bring myself to tell anyone through pure shame and embarrassment. I did nothing wrong, yet I'm being tarred with same brush. I've become a recluse, don't leave the house, don't speak to anyone. Feel like I'm dying from the inside. Can't motivate myself, I have tried so hard. I'm lost and noone cares. Sending love xx❤️❤️
my first draft of my comment was like 2 full paragraphs and then i thought WTF, no need to go new testament of the bible on here. so. short but to the point: amen to that. you are damn right. i find its not helpful to tell people the same old same old condolences stuff like "he she is in heaven now", or "i totally understand how you feel" (no. you dont.), so i just tell people in grief, that they MUST do whatever they feel they have to process the horror theyre going through (unless that means unaliving yourself. then please seek help.) - theres NO right or wrong there.
Even when you're making such a valid, serious and important point - you never fail to make me chuckle! So thank you for giving me something to think about AND making me laugh in public over a cup of tea! 🧡
With grief try and remember the good times with that person..
Definitely, Terry! 🧡
You do a beautiful job of talking through really complex and difficult subjects. You should be proud of the positive impact you’re having on other people, and you’re a wonderful example of how to turn pain into something beautiful 💙
Thank you, darling. Likewise, with your words - I can only dream to be able to translate my thoughts and feeling as well as you do. 🧡
I unexpectedly lost my wife of 20 years 7 weeks ago. This grief stuff really sucks, never had to deal with it before other than lost pets. I'm out from under the initial shock of finding her like that, on to the realization of loneliness (never been lonely before either). The well wishers and condolence people disappeared after the first 3 weeks, I'm glad of that but felt bad for my wife that their lives went back to normal so quickly. I intellectually understood that but the stupid emotions are slow to keep up. We have a semi verbal autistic son that keeps me focused and functional. This isn't a journey that I had ever envisioned. Still trying to find some light on the horizon. Just watching vids like this to try to make sense out of everything.
i am so, so sorry for your loss and i hope that you are okay. losing somebody like that brings pain that is almost unimaginable, and i know i am a random person you've never met but if you ever need to vent, feel free to just come back to this comment and reply to it. wishing you all the best right now ❤
I lost my husband of 33 years 1 year ago today..
He had Pancreatic cancer that spread to his liver. The illness was short (less than 5 months) Thankfully. We DID have the time to say everything that needed to be said..and we had all his affairs in order.
I've found an inner strength that I did NOT know I had in me.
1 year later, I've met someone new..who has also been through the loss of a spouse. I had NO idea that this juncture of my life could be as happy as it is.
My husband made me promise that I would NOT stay alone...
I'm glad I listened to him!!!
This is such a wonderful story. Thank you so much for sharing this. 🧡
Thank you for this video ❤️
I've been following Daniel's journey (and some others as well) about 4 years before my mom was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer (July 2021) and it has literally changed my life and outlook on it. It has helped me prioritize my mom and step back and do and say things that I wanted to cherish and not do/say things that would eat my soul from regret. Her journey was short (good 6 months) and in my eyes it was the best possible "goodbye" I could have with her. All the time I was thinking how I wanted to remember this time with her and make sure I have no regrets. The only bitter thoughts that comes with that journey is that taking about death and dying was not allowed. I understand her thought process "if I don't talk about it, I won't "attract" it", but it would help with my grief. I somehow got all that from someone who went through this horrible disease (in a fb group, unfortunately he also passed away and it was all like a flashback for my mom at that time) and in a dream I had of my mom after her passing where she was in a hospital and she said "you know, I'm in paliative unit now" and I replied "I know, mama, you've been here before" (she was there when she was going for radiation before) and she stopped, put a hand on my shoulder, looked me dead in the eyes and said "but this time it's different". I can still vividly remember that dream. It's like she came in my dreams to fix that bitter feelings. It's been 9 months since her passing and I still break down and cry like a baby sometimes.
You know the saying "time heals all wounds"? It doesn't. We just learn to live with the pain that a loss like that brings. Even though I knew my mom would pass away and we (family) were preparing for that, even though I've lost friends and some family members (great grandpa, grandpa and two grandmas) in the past, it still hit me like a brick in the head when I've realised that when she was gone, she was gone for good. I can feel her around occasionally, but it's totally different.
Thank you, Becca. I know your story and you are and we’re so brave. I lost my guy 2 1/2 years ago and I am still grieving. I am 70 now and he was 78. I had cancer 6 years ago but luckily am in remission. We thought then, he would outlive me, but it didn’t work that way. Even at our ages, I never thought of losing him. He was a kind, good man. We had two dogs, and he would take them for a car ride every day. The car door closed and hit the side of his head. His brain bled and he suffered for two years. At the end he stopped eating, and passed away at home. I still miss him, our home, our beautiful yard, and our life. I am 70 and there will not be another love in my life. I am living with my daughter now and I am very grateful to my kids. They are my rock now, but I miss my life.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Please keep us posted to how you are - and your vulnerability is an inspiration - I am just sorry I am only replying to this now. 🧡
I lost a girlfriend 3 years ago today, and I feel empty, i hate who I've become and I hate why it's happened, I'm struggling and even after 3 years I still haven't gotten through it. I miss her, this helped me it helped me let out a cry. Thank you ❤
I really hope you're okay and looking after yourself. 🧡
Thank you.
I too, would rather pay the price than to have never loved her at all 💓
I completely agree. The pain is actually worth it. Sending you so much love. 🧡
Now you've made me cry (happy tears).
I lost my mother in September, 2021. Not a day goes by that I don't miss her. I've been in counseling, I feel my coping mechanisms are helping, and remembering to give myself grace is key.
Thank you for this. Sending big love to you.
David! It was my turn to set you off (you do it to me all the time! We should start keeping score.) please do give yourself time. She would be so proud of you. Thank you for sharing this. 🧡
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom in October of 2020, and my husband in August 2021. Prayers for healing.
what gentleness, what true compassion and kindness, what true wisdom!!!
Thank you so much. 🧡
I lost someone only 6 days ago... A love interest. I've lost friends, family members and pets throughout my life, but this is the first time I lost someone who I had romantic feelings for. It's not often I catch feelings like that for someone. I only knew her a few months as well, but the pain I'm feeling right now resembles the pain I'd feel for someone I knew my whole life. I never got to tell her how I truly felt... She was only 25, 2 years younger than me...
I honestly haven't felt pain like this from grief since my best friend went completely insane with psychosis in 2014. He was never the same again after that. He's still in a hospital, they literally can't let him out. He's too far gone. I didn't manage to move forward with that until about 2019.
Thank you for this video. It needs more views. It's the most helpful one so far of the videos I've been watching on the topic of grief...
I'm actually crying right now cause your words in this video really touch my heart. The best advice for surviving grief is to give yourself time. You have been through a traumatic experience by losing your loved one. Do not let someone tell you how you should be feeling or that you need to “ get over” this and my personal favorite, just “ let them go”. Everyone’s relationships are different. They have different intensity emotionally. You will not grieve the same way for your parents as you do for your child or spouse who has passed on. There is a difference between grief and depression and what some people call complicated grief. Living life without your loved one is learning a new way to live. It takes time to get comfortable with it. It doesn’t mean you will not have moments of emotional reactions for instance, a place, a song, a smell. You are remembering and that is honoring the one you loved. Sometimes remembering is painful because we confront again, that we are living here on earth without our loved ones. So often we try to fill our lives up with distractions instead of dealing with our feelings. The best way to survive your grief is to lean into it. Feel your loss. It’s your loss, your grief. No one gets over it, we learn to live with our grief. Someone said, and I think this is a beautiful statement: Grief is the final responsibility of loving someone. We remember them and learn, little by little to live without them. We honor our loved ones by living, by going on. Much love Becca ❤️
Of course, one of my favourite internet persons quoted one of my favourite quotes! Thank you so much, always, for your gorgeous comment. They mean the world to me and everyone should read this. Thank you. 🧡
I needed this, thank you ❤️
I lost my brother last year 😔
I cannot imagine the pain. I have a little brother myself, and I can't imagine life without him. Please let yourself feel, and give yourself time. 🧡
Yes, you are spot on; I know you are helping others more than you realize. Sending hugs back to you. May the love from others help to comfort you too. 💖
Thank you so much, the comments and all of your love means more to me than any of you will ever realise. I wish I could show you how grateful I am. 🧡
@@IamBecca We know how much you care or you wouldn't do these videos. Your life experiences are helping others and feel this has been part of your life plan. I feel, no matter how tough the road, your guided and not alone; it runs In the family. You are works of special deeds.❤ 😉
Grief runs alongside all the other emotions in your life, it’s part of living unfortunately. You do have a beautiful way of expressing things. When my Dad died, I was too young to realise the impact. I tried to block it but I had the most dreadful anxiety and panic attacks. Many years later I wrote him a really honest letter. It was the best thing I did. I have lost quite a few people now, I grieve them, but I also laugh at wonderful memories and see them in all I do.
Thank you for this - everyone could take something away from this. 🧡
I'll never forget my experience with grief. Losing my dad in my teenage years. Those months afterwards walking around feeling like a total zombie. Having people say they could see the life taken out of me. It's incredible how it completely changed me as a human being. I look back on the Kurtis I was before losing him and that just isn't me anymore. Some things I miss about that Kurtis but I've also learnt to be alot more compassionate and caring from going through a traumatic experience like that. It's also made me appreciate my friends and family alot more because I know how fickle of a thing life can be
Ugh KURTIS!!!! Your comments always make a difference to me. You have learnt so much from your experiences. Thank you for this. 🧡
Thank you 🙂 I find your videos a great source of comfort. From our interactions in the comments it makes watching your videos like taking some sound advice from a good friend. You should be immensely proud of the community you have built
My depression this year is the worst I've ever dealt with. It's the second holiday season without my husband. Things in my family have changed drastically and I'm feeling like no one cares. My RA is taking more and more of my independence daily.
It was so bad the other night I seriously considered calling my daughter to take me to the hospital so I could check in to the mental health ward.
Sorry for venting here. I really don't like dumping my troubles on others.
❤
I’m very sorry. This is the first year without my dad for the holidays. This is a difficult time.
Never, ever apologise. This is a safe space! I really wish I could help you more than just with words, but you're doing incredibly. Asking for help is the first step. 🧡
Thank you so much for this video ❤🕊️
🧡🧡🧡
I'm so glad to see a video from you, you're so right, we all grieve in our own way and there's no shame in it. Wishing love to you and everyone who has ever been through this, we grieve for different reasons and different things and it helps to remember that ❤️
It really does help to remember that. Thank you for leaving such a lovely comment. I hope you’re well? 🧡
@@IamBecca thank you for the video and the support that you give! There are times I struggle but it helps to see such good people in the world and realize while we're all unique, we're all together in this. I wish you so much love and joy for the future, I hope you're keeping as well as you can 😊
Today I can't sleep, I'm so anxious, and not feeling good about myself. That's what I'm here to hear your words again. It helps me accept what I'm going through and be gentle to myself.
I really hope you are doing okay? 🧡
The word “grief” doesn’t come anywhere close to describing the absolute devastation wrought on a daily basis.
I remember being told that if you love someone fighting cancer, you’ll catch a little bit of it too & I discovered this to be a fair assessment of the situation.
Not only do you lose a loved one but with that you also lose the future you thought you’d be living.
Two years later I still know nothing about grief other than it stalks me like a ghost, waiting to trip me up when I thought the storm had pass…maybe it doesn’t pass or maybe I simply love too hard.
This was such a poetic comment - have you considered writing? This may help as an outlet? 🧡
Thank you for this video, so very much. I lost my Dad in June, on Fathers Day of all days. I still find it so hard to accept he's gone. We were very close and I saw him, and Mum, every day. It scares me to think about losing my Mum, which will inevitably happen at some point. I can't do life without my Dad, how on earth will I do it without her too 😔 Grief is just so damn hard xx
thank you, and I really hope you're okay too
I have no idea how this popped up on my feed but I lost my father 9 days ago and really needed to hear this. Thank you.
We are all so glad you're here. I hope you're coping, as best you can. 🧡
What a beautiful and perfect video that i wish everyone could see! 💗💗💜💜 thank you for making this 🙏 I'm grieving the recent loss of a parent and it has stirred up all kinds of emotions including suddenly being afraid of everyone else passing away too (which, as you said, is very normal) - In my experience, having lost family and friends - grief does change and evolve, - from the slicing and devastating blade it starts as and, over time, life grows around this loss that has been implanted in your very body and heart and it becomes part of you more as an imprint of love, and remembrance. Everyone grieves differently but for me, time always helped me feel more connected to the people I lost. I can feel my loved ones around me and guiding me or just in my happy memories. I'm sending all my love to everyone reading this comment who has experienced loss - whether that is a literal death, or another deep loss.
You know your comments always get to me. This is so beautiful, so artistically written. Thank you, on behalf of all of us who have read it. You're marvellous. 🧡
I watched this even though I'm not grieving right now. My Mom passed in February 2021 but she was almost 96 and was very ready to go. I lived with her in her home for almost 10 years. It has been an adjustment. I still have a pile of her things that have been sitting in my dining room for over a year. I hope maybe I'll be able to go through them sometime next year. For now I just want to enjoy the season we are in. Thanks for all you share! 💗
Thank you so much for this insight, I love hearing how things impact people on all different points of life. I hope you had a lovely end to 2022 and that 2023 brings you lightness and happiness. 🧡
Your amazing u help me I have thyroid cancer your video Nd pee,a keep me going. Thank you for share this with us please keep making videos love to you all
I will keep creating. Thank YOU. 🧡
Grief and I are old pals. Thanks for the video and the hug Becca! May God keep you safe and well!
Bless your heart. Sending so much love. 🧡
Thank you so much for this video, to find it today, the first anniversary of loosing my father really did help. The grief has changed over that time but the lose is still there and sometimes you just need that affirmation that it is still ok to grieve. Thank you again.
Andrew, I really hope the day was kind to you. 🧡
You're a beautiful person all around and I wish you nothing but the best
Thank you so much, this means the world. 🧡
You have such a calming way about you. 2022 has been one of the worst years I have been threw. In the last 11 months I lost my 17 year old fur baby, my 2 very best friends, the sewage backed up in my basement and destroyed so much and last Tuesday my car was totaled. Praying for a better 2023... ☹
Oh Susan, it really seems like you had a year of it last year - I wish I could give you a hug! I am wishing you a much better one this year. 🧡
I lost my only sibling, my little sister in a car accident back in March of this year, she was only 31, tomorrow will be the first of the holiday's without her...
I cannot even begin to know how this would feel. I really hope the holidays have been kind to you. 🧡
@@IamBecca thanks, I'm surviving, I really try to stay positive because i know thats what she would have wanted, even though i can feel a lonesome cold empty shadow of what was... trying to take over, I hope life is going good for you..
Thank you I don't go anywhere me and my wife used to go because the pain and sadness overwhelmes me it's been a little over a year now and my family says I've changed and every day is a challenge thanks for sharing this.
I hope it gets easier with every passing day, love. 🧡
Its a little more than 1 year now and im still a mess!
Feel all the feels. 🧡
Thank you for this video ❤
This video came at the perfect time, I lost my mom 2 months ago. It doesn’t feel real. Thank you for putting out this video, much love to you.
Sending you a huge hug. I wish I had the words - but let us know how you are doing. 🧡
Awe thank you for this 🥺 I just lost someone very very special to me. And everything you are saying is so true. I wish everyone would watch this video. Thank you ❤
Oh thank you so much for your lovely words - and I am so sorry to hear you have lost someone. I hope you found some comfort here and sending you a massive hug. 🧡
This was a beautiful video, Becca. You have much to be proud of, reaching out this way and helping other people. I hope you, too, are doing well.
Thank you so so very much. You're wonderful. 🧡
Ive stumbled across all of this just tonight, hit me like a brick, very surreal… im sorry life is so tough darlin, everyone…..
Thank you, and welcome. 🧡
Becca , you are wonderful , don’t give in , don’t give up 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 Love and best wishes to you , xxxxx
Thank you, thank you. I shan't! 🧡
It definitely becomes a part of you. 💙🕊️🙏
It really does. I love the dove emoji. 🧡
Thank you! I lost my mom to Covid in October 2020, I was finally feeling okay til April 2021. My husband was diagnosed with Metastatic Small Cell Lung Cancer in April 2021. We had been together 35 1/2 years, within four months in August 2021 he lost his battle with Cancer. My heart is broken, I am in grief Counseling, and it has helped tremendously. I miss my husband and my mom every day. Some days it is just so hard. I dread Thanksgiving this Thursday, I will be alone. That’s the hard part being alone.😢
I wish I could give you a hug. Thank you for your vulnerability and if there were words I could give you to help, I would give them to you. Please do let us know how you are getting on. 🧡
Oh gosh I needed this. I hate being human and feeling things it’s so painful
But we feel wonderful things too. 🧡
Thank you
it has been a while since ive grieved now...but it comes back sometime...it does not really matter for the feelings towards this vid though..it truly is just weird,how you,a person ive (unfortunately) never met,can project the feelings that ALWAYS hits home,you are bringing things to the table EVERY time you make a vid Becca...you truly mean more and more to me...thank you for being YOU
Thank you for being YOU! Your comment is gorgeous and gives me motivation to create more. Thank you. 🧡
You explained that so beautifully, perfect really. Thank you
Thank you always. 🧡
Thank you Becca...you told me exactly what I needed to hear.
I lost my father just over 4 months ago. My hero.
Thank you for telling me the truth that grief is something that clings and its about learning what you feel is normal and valid.
That reaching out when needed is the best way to find a way through this journey.
I heard it gets better with time so much I wanted to scream as I knew this would not go away.
Glad to see you again Becca. I have thought about you often.
It is the price we pay for love. Thank you for your comment and please look after yourself. 🧡
❤❤❤ very wise words from a beautiful young lady, gorgeous inside and outside;
Thank you, always. 🧡
Thank u for this video. U always have the right words to say and I appreciate it.
I lost my aunt in April then 2 mths later my eldest sons grandad (his dads dad)
I was still close to him after me and his son split.
My aunt was my mums sister who was like a 2nd mum to me and my brothers.
We were very close.
I lost my dad 17 yrs ago and my mum 3yrs ago.
The grieving mixed with my bad depression is very hard but i try my best everyday for my sons.
I wish I could give you a hug Amanda. But know I am sending a virtual one. 🧡
@@IamBecca ahh thank u. Means alot xx
Thank you, Becca. Much love. Cheers.
Thank you for being here. So much love.🧡
@@IamBecca 💜
I am so sorry for your loss I know how yiu you feel my dad died in 2014 from cancer its so hard 😢 I hope you are ok sending you lots of love and hugs xxx thinking of you
Sending so much love to you, always. 🧡
2019 i lost my grandad, 2020 i lost my gran and last year i lost my uncle and auntie, and i am only just starting to accept they are gone, i didn't know how to process it properly but the thing that made me slowly move pass the grief was the fact they would probably tell me to stop dwelling on their passings and enjoy life while i can
Please do look after yourself. 🧡
I understand you sweetheart, I lost my sister suddenly just after 3 months after she knew she has an aggressive cancer she was only 32. She was married just 8 months and she died .I went to my foreign country spent with her 20 days. Everything you saying is correct these feelings exist. She was my only sister. We've never separated even when going to university every morning. I remember during the weekend she put her cloths secretly in my clothes so I will wash them hhhhhh. She was an amazing lady. I love her . I wish you will be always happy Becca. Thank you for your video. Sending love. 🥰🥰🥰. I'm sure you have a beautiful heart. We love you.
Oh thank you for being vulnerable and open - you're so brave and strong and loved. 🧡
I needed this. Thanks so much ♥️
Thank you for being here. 🧡
Fave ❤
Tomorrow would be my father's birthday, he passed away due to cancer... it's been some years now so I know the pain won't go, but the pain is the reflection of how much he matters to me, so I don't want it to go away...as weird as that sounds.
Huge virtual hug to everyone, have a nice day.
I am sorry I am only just responding - but I really hope you are okay. None of this sounds weird at all. Sending you a virtual hug. 🧡
Rip grandpa ❤
Rest in peace. I really hope this video helped you in some way. 🧡
@@IamBecca it did thanks so much for reaching out
@@IamBecca I found out just 2 hours ago
Thank you so much for this.
Thank you for being here. 🧡
Thank you 💙
Thank *you*. 🧡
What's going on in Rafah breaks my heart. I don't wish to live in a world so messed up.
Oh my gosh I just Put two and two together!!!!
That you are Daniel’s wife
I watched Many Many videos of his… it’s funny I wondered what happened to you 💕 I hope life is treating you good!!!
Welcome! Thank you so much for being here. 🧡
❤
Thank you David - I hope you're okay.
Stay amazing! 👍
Only if you do! 🧡
Hey Becca just found this channel instant subscribe
Welcome!!! Thank you so much for being here with us.🧡
Hi Bec, I'm grieving the loss of my partner. He was my world, but the last 5 years of his life, due to his terminal diagnosis, he became so abusive, verbally and emotionally. He destroyed me and my autistic son. I am lost, feel I have no purpose, and no one understands why I stayed with him. I did it because I promised I'd care for him until the end. I won't leave home now, am isolated, and so lonely. And I've lost me. And I can't seem to find me or any motivation to carry on. My sons behavior has been affected but no one cares. I have no family and friends I had left me because they didn't understand the loss I felt. Can you help me please? Thanks for being here xx
Oh Lizzie, I wish I was a trained professional with the words to help. Have you been able to seek any professional advice? Maybe see if there is any support in your local area? You do not have to be alone in this. 🧡
Thanks Bec. I can't bring myself to tell anyone through pure shame and embarrassment. I did nothing wrong, yet I'm being tarred with same brush. I've become a recluse, don't leave the house, don't speak to anyone. Feel like I'm dying from the inside. Can't motivate myself, I have tried so hard. I'm lost and noone cares. Sending love xx❤️❤️
I was waiting for vidéo on sanday, I hope you're doing well.
my first draft of my comment was like 2 full paragraphs and then i thought WTF, no need to go new testament of the bible on here.
so. short but to the point:
amen to that. you are damn right. i find its not helpful to tell people the same old same old condolences stuff like "he she is in heaven now", or "i totally understand how you feel" (no. you dont.), so i just tell people in grief, that they MUST do whatever they feel they have to process the horror theyre going through (unless that means unaliving yourself. then please seek help.) - theres NO right or wrong there.
Even when you're making such a valid, serious and important point - you never fail to make me chuckle! So thank you for giving me something to think about AND making me laugh in public over a cup of tea! 🧡
❤
🧡 🧡 🧡