I deliberately didn't share which books I'm reading because they're kind of trashy and I'm embarrassed. But I will confess in an upcoming "what's cheering me up right now"
I just found out from a book of essays I'm reading tonight that my favourite author was also a big fan not only of Austen, which is well known, but Elizabeth Jane Howard, who I thought was my own discovery. Also any book which brings joy is creditable. I just finished a Georgette Heyer murder mystery: she's brilliant but the book was pretty by numbers, I still enjoyed it.
Something I realized is that when I think wow I need another one of this item, I'm actually just realizing that I'm appreciating the item. There's no lack, I have the thing that I need. I just need to reframe that as gratitude for a great thing instead of trying to get more of it
Agreed. I also think my fear of it not being enough in those moments would be assuaged if I remembered that I also put energy into mindlfully caring for my favourite things and learning how to mend them.
I am loving this content. I realize that so much of my shopping behavior is because it tricks my brain into thinking I’m solving a problem, thus in control of (one part of) my life. But now whenever life feels overwhelming my thought is “Go research a purchase that will solve this.” And the reality is, most purchases don’t solve my life.
What you're going through with shopping, I'm going through with TH-cam. I think I'm using extreme TH-cam watching to avoid dealing with things. Thanks for this video, it's given me a lot to think about!
I feel this! So I’m declutter my internet life ( emails, social media and You Tube subscriptions). Simplifying life is like the way I want to walk. Good job in your journey!
Me too! When Hannah put out the first video on this project, I thought I'd try the same but with TH-cam videos. Turns out, most of the videos I watched were just uninteresting to me on Sundays...I was just watching them to procrastinate work and not let myself actually unwind in the spare moments. (A couple of thoughtful videos will still likely make it into my weekend watch list. But that's a whole different reality from my previous usual.)
Something I’ve also been going through also. I realized is actually a lack of contentment. And frustration with work, which unfortunately extremely difficult to change. So I have been focusing on what’s good in my life, and has helped a lot with not numbing out, rather than being present, in my life such as it is.
This struck me today while I was listening: I really appreciate that you call this a "project" instead of a "challenge." A "project" feels like an intellectual activity, something that's new to you that you're approaching with curiosity (science fair project). The word "challenge" implies a real stretch, something that is quite hard to complete and perhaps will even be punishing to your body (cinnamon challenge). Gamification in the classroom is meant to build student engagement, but calling everything we do a "challenge" might have unintended consequences if the word carries these subtle negative messages!
Challenge definitely has obstacle or possible failure connotation compared to project which is a work in progress, something to work on to improve something, where failure isn’t an option because as long as you learn something, you’ve accomplished something.
Something that I just realized while in the middle of watching your video is that shopping is one of the easiest methods I have for exercising control in my life. To me it represents autonomy - I've put in the time researching a thing I want, have deliberated and made a decision on which exact item I'm going to buy, use my own money to buy it, have the thing and enjoy it, and no one can say anything about it lol. Maybe this largely stems from my dysfunctional upbringing of instability and scarcity, in which I felt almost completely out of control of what happened to me, but I find shopping to be very positive and empowering. This can make it far more difficult for me to minimize my unnecessary shopping, because nearly any purchase can feel therapeutic and provide me with a sense of autonomy I never had.
Here because of the most recent "Read Comments With Me" video to applaud you! I feel so seen 🤗 I'm glad that overall, the aspect of asserting control over your life through deliberate purchases is so positive for you. This is what I aspire to, too! Personally, I feel like there is still a big disfunctional component to it (for me), as I seem to shop for a "quick fix" of my life, trying to evoke the temporary feeling of control rather often. At least I notice a link between situations of feeling "not where I thought I should be at this time in my life" and the urge to upgrade my interior or flaunt a new handbag. So much growth ahead of me! ❤
Thank you for bringing this up. It has shed more light onto my shopping tendencies. For me, it was the thrill of the purchase itself. It didn't matter if I needed it or not. I had the power to buy whatever I wanted. I have learned a lot along my no buy journey this year.
My brain totally loves a deeeeeep dive into researching and finding the “best” thing and then giving up entirely once I find it 😂 such a time suck. I think I’m going to join you on this journey!
I have also had to make a concerted effort to unsubscribe from the constant barrage of emails from my favourite brands... I really appreciate these conversations, these self-studies in how we use the internet to escape. It's very interesting to acknowledge how the browsing, the research, the clicking, seeps into our thoughts on a daily, hourly, momentary basis. I'm not judging it, but I do feel this study is important as we look at ourselves, our desire for a better quality of life, and what that actually looks like. Thanks for this post :-)
I don’t think I clocked my browsing as an escapist habit until you verbalized it! It crops up so often during the workday when the level (or type) of work induces anxiety. I have found that Pinterest has been helpful in terms of “setting and forgetting” whatever I keep circling back to. Something about knowing I’ve filed it away helps. I’ll have to try restricting shopping around to the weekends!
I would totally recommend everyone who enjoyed this video think about reading The Year of Less! The author goes into detail about her no buy year and how she realized shopping was totally an emotional habit for her- a distraction or coping mechanism. (She does also mention her journeys with sobriety and dealing with binge eating, in case thats problematic to read about for some)
The reading thing is so interesting to me. I catch myself feeling really guilty for reading "too much" some days (i.e. feels like it's getting in the way of productivity), but I've realized that actually at this moment in my life right now it's a really healthy way of taking care of myself. Yes, maybe I'm not utilizing the day to its full potential, yes, maybe I'm distracting myself from my own thoughts, but it's a passion of mine. I love reading. I love books. It's not actively hurting me. I'm working on the reason in other ways (therapy is great), so I can give myself a break with this one.
I finally (many years after first seeing your No Buy Year video) have put myself on a no-buy year. The sense of mental relief I feel when I realize I don't even need to browse because I can't buy anyway is huge! I feel like I have so much of my time back, and so much more mental energy to spend on what is really important to me, how I consume, and what I actually need in my life. Thank you for these videos!
The quality of the comments under this video is insane! One can tell by reading them alone that you hit a nerve on this one. Beautiful video (and comments)!
You could set aside work time at the end of Friday for work related purchases. That way the pattern of waiting to do shopping behaviors is still in place, but work time and off time are separated.
So much food for thought here! My 2024 project is tackling those nodes of stuck Chi I see in my life: continuing 2023's Swedish death cleaning of my stuff, confronting decades-old bad sleep hygiene, adding lean muscle mass.
I love reading. I read hundreds of books a year. But my last postpartum recovery led to excessive reading that I know now was a manifestation of postpartum depression. (I mean I read 2-3 books a day, it was BAD.) Reading is such a joy. And you can read like it’s your full time job and that not be unhealthy. But I know that it can be an unhealthy method of avoidance for me. And it can be my favorite form of entertainment. Both can be true. It’s up to me to find the right balance for my current season of life. ♥️♥️♥️
This is so interesting. I had a bit of a compulsive reading habit in the first months after the birth of my daughter. For me it felt like reading was a indispensable way of turning inward and recharching my introvert batteries that were quite drained by the constant attention given to my baby. But this put a different perspective on it.
@@MrClairemary I completely agree. And that did make a big difference in how I handled that round of postpartum. (In a good and healthy way.) But I know for ME I was combative and angry when loved ones suggested that maybe I was reading a little too much. And now being several years removed from it I can see why. Even though I still use reading to recharge my battery. 🥰
I was interested to see how this journey went for you, now I’m really tempted to do it myself. Listening you describe how I you were using it as an escape makes me realize how I use internet browsing as a weird kind of cleaning or gardening that requires no physical effort. I make lists, check bookmarks, monitor sales, and get a weird sense of satisfaction that I would normally get from tending real things in real life.
"my closet is what's wrong with my life." 😭 such a first world problem and I just realized as you said that this is exactly how I've been feeling lately and how really untrue it is on so many levels if I am honest with myself. Thanks for sharing!
“Do you need this or do you need to be at home doing laundry?” Is a life changing question. I work at home and often “shop” to get out of the house. I love listening you talk about this, Hannah. It helps my brain a lot.
I had a torn ACL during covid so I had a long lead up time to my operation. I just couldn’t do much physically and like most people, I get kinda melancholy when I don’t have something productive to do. I turned to learning things on TH-cam. I’d listen to hours long lectures on Very Smart Things and such. And of course there’s a lot of fun and entertaining things as well …. Then there was the recouping post surgery and the long months of rehab. I was more active again but still limited. Anyhow … I’m absolutely fine now. Strong as a horse. And I’m back to being active and getting stuff done but I have to have something on. A podcast or even just videos of other people doing the thing I’m engaged in doing …. It’s so weird lol. I used to be an avid reader but I find I have a serious case of FOMO re the channels I follow here and my books just sit there until I binge them before their due back at the library 🙄. I’ve started slow. Something as simple as when I take my walk in the morning, I’m not listening to anything. No music, no podcasts, no audio books. Just walking and being with my own thoughts. It’s crazy how our brains can mess with us lol. I didn’t even want to listen to this one (I was cooking dinner … cause I can’t possibly cook dinner without listening to another human talking apparently 😂) because I knew it would make me feel all squirmy inside … but I’m grateful for this vulnerable and honest sharing, Hannah. I’m not alone. We’re all struggling with something like this and it doesn’t make us “bad” it makes us human. We just want to be humans who are a little free’r on the inside and I’m thankful for all y’all out there ❤
I mentioned that phone locking device thingy that I bought and I have no regrets. I lock my phone away at 5p once we are all home from school/work. It's wild how many times I reached for it the first few days - to check the weather, to look up the definition of a word, and because it's just habit. I finished the two books I had been reading for months, went on two runs, but most importantly I just hung out undistracted with my husband and son. HOWEVER, I also feel like my shopping was covering up some things and after almost 3 months on the no-buy I signed up for therapy ha.
It's also wild how the urge to declutter is looming large. I now feel like my life is full to the brim with stuff I don't need. What IS that? I didn't feel that way when I was shopping all the time. So interesting.
Gosh, I just love these types of videos you share! They’re always so thoughtful and thought-provoking. Though I don’t over shop, I am realizing hearing you talk about how you put things on a list to look up later only to find later that it isn’t all that pressing or compelling makes me realize how often I turn to this little computer in my pocket to look up anything when it crosses my mind. Not that there’s anything wrong with wanting to know when the gym closes or looking up a book review, but this video makes me wonder whether the instant gratification of knowing is really serving me, or whether I could make a list and check everything later, and stay present with the wondering in the meantime.
Your comments about not allowing space for things to bubble up hit me so hard. This is absolutely something I do. Shopping isn't really my thing, but being on my phone in general is absolutely a distraction from organically feeling my feelings. But like you, I want those emotions to bubble up so that I can heal. This video (and project generally) is really resonating with me and making me think about creating my own project of a similar sorts. I love the pie chart metaphor and I'm thinking that will be where I start. I want to understand what fills up my chart and discern what is distracting and what actually brings me joy. As a masters student, procrastination and burnout are a cyclical nightmare, so I think something like what you are doing will be an amazing way for me to gently start addressing my needs. Thank you, Hannah, for making this video and being so honest about your process. You truly are an inspiration ❤
Holy. Cow. The connection you made from the compulsion to want to shop during the week to the availability to but aversion from actually doing it on the weekend was so insightful. Identifying THAT as a coping mechanism as you said… what a connection. Never thought of it like that! So insightful.
On Gmail there is a way to automatically send all emails with certain terms in them like "unsubscribe" directly to trash or junk. Just make sure you catalogue which emails you might get with that word that are important so you can designate them as exceptions, like emails from your bank, or airlines, etc.
The fact that reading could also be kind of toxic blows my mind. What I thought was the end goal - to read instead of scrolling - could also be a sort of escape. This idea blew my mind. And I can see the reasoning behind it but I also think that you don't need to be so hard on yoirself. Maybe scheduling a time for reading would help? I am relatively new so I don't know if you like to schedule your day or not.
I kept a list this week as well to capture all the demands my brain attempts on my bank account-for totally emotional reasons. This weekend most of the fervor has faded. I too binge read in a wildly deep way, when I “just can’t” with day to day tasks. Interesting area for further inquiry. Thanks for being so open with your wondering and practices.
You’re insights are simple and revolutionary. You’re brilliant. Thank you for taking extra good care of yourself and then teaching us how to do the same.❤
I am feeling this challenge! As of today, I have decided to try and do this with you. A couple things I’m thinking of trying: 1. I’m using Indyx to catalogue my wardrobe so that instead of shopping I’m tempted to look at my own wardrobe instead. 2. I’m starting a separate wishlist of “wishlist to shop for”.
I think your brain and body are protecting you until you’re psychologically/materially safe to deal with whatever your issue is. Don’t rush it. If novel reading works as well as shopping, all the better. As long as it’s a non damaging coping mechanism, fine. We’re not ready to unpack and confront everything at any time.
I started doing something similar in 2022, where I can only spend during the first 5 days of the month, and more specifically I can only spend the amount remaining on my pre-paid card from the previous month. I also have a few additional rules, like no shipping after 8pm and no buying anything that'd not been in my cart or wishlist for at least 24 hours and so on. This has been working so well on so many levels that I still stick to it like 10 months a year. 😊
I'm reading so many comments about shopping being something that gives someone a sense of control and it made me realize that I absolutely do this. I'm usually pretty good when it comes to shopping and haven't really bought anything since the holiday season, but this week something that was out of my control happened and by "coincidence" I bought a lot of things this week, some that I actually needed, some that I didn't, and even stuff for other people that I was procrastinating on. After just making the conection I will be taking the next days to reflect on my use of shopping and browsing as a disassociating mechanism and a way to take control over my life in momens I feel I don't have any.
Your self awareness and raw honesty are so refreshing!!! Your videos always leave me feeling called out and comforted at the same time. You're the brutal honest budget friend I need in my life!! 😂🙌💖
I have the very opposite problem, I browse because I THINK I have nothing else to do. I'm disabled, along with a hefty dose of ADHD, browsing gives me the chance to stare into the neverending void of things I love. BUT, it keeps me so engaged that I don't know how long I've been scrolling, the fun of time blindness. I need to focus on the things I need to get done when I am feeling up to it & not let my propensity to distract myself take over. I have enough trouble fighting my executive dysfunction & shopping is part of that cycle. I hadn't thought about that until I got around to watching your intro video earlier.
i've had a rather small wardrobe in the past & in 2023 i decided i wanted to elevate it with more variety. i now have ~45 clothing items & it is plenty! i know that i need to slow my roll, because poshmark is somewhat addictive. i've set a 6mo clothing no-buy. so far, so good.
I've developed a browsing issue over the past year and it's become asphyxiating because it's sucking my time and my soul...thank you brain for wanting to soothe me of my anxieties but stopppppp. Or rather, I need to say "it's okay, I got this" These videos came at the perfect time for me as I too am working to revamp my schedule to be productive in my work as well as do what I need to get done in "real life" each day. The call of distraction the second a doubt hits is incredible. Is this a muscle we need to exercise to get stronger in saying "no, it's okay, another time"? I think so. I'm so grateful for this series from you and Let's do this! Loved your update.
Hi Hannah, always uniquely fascinating though I do not always understand. I think Brains (at least mine) want what they want when they want it and then if they cannot get it, they just turn it off and stop wanting it. It is just “too late” so in many ways it pouts and finds something else it can have (i.e. reading) which it could get. I think a person should have desires or a safe place to put them so you do not lose that fire and passion for them… once a person turns off a desire it turns off “the wild” … but I get that training a brain into a fine cultivated machine is very important. ❤❤❤ Heart for all you do! Like Marilla to Anne Shirley, “save a little time for romance”….
A weird thing happens to me when I watch your videos: I always tend to go into my wish lists on apps, and I keep adding/removing/curating the lists or the carts or SOMETHING. It’s as if you immediately make me want to think about the items a bit more. Also, re: subscription/brand emails…if you use outlook, you can create a folder and a rule in which those specific emails (usually “brand-no reply@ blah blah blah) can be automatically sent to a separate folder in your inbox. And you can set it up and let it roll. All of my Ulta/Sephora/airline/etc emails go there. It’s AMAZING and extremely helpful for productivity.
In the past, I had a huge collection of clothes, truly beautiful pieces but I pretty much only wore like 20% of it... so I kept the things I really liked and was actively wearing and donated the rest. This was in early 2021... and now, 3 years later, the clothes I kept are starting to be worn out and/or stained, to the point I don't feel as polished as I want to. I have to go shopping for some clothes and I will try investing in good quality ones - since I'm getting only a few pieces, it will be fine. HOWEVER I still need to be conscious about traps like the whole 'putting in the cart just in case', research, try ons, etc. Your videos are so helpful to be more insightful in these moments, thank you so much for sharing your experiences and strategies 💙
You are so right Hannah! The allure of the magical thing. Rarely does anything I buy feel as exciting as when I first discover it and start searching online for it. Why do I think I can shop away every emotional gap I have in my life or solve every problem?
Novel reading is fine!! I’ll go through bouts of binge reading, but then not read for weeks. Sometimes you need to go with what your mind says it needs. ( As an author I might be biased-lol.). Love your channel!!
I love your imitation of your brain as a bratty teenager. Mine is that a lot, when it’s not being a toddler throwing a tantrum and yelling, “I don’t wanna!” 🤎🤎🤎
My theory is your need for stimulation, excitement, interest and depth was already fulfilled by hanging out with your friend. I know for me the more time I spend doing things with friends, the less I need to shop.
This video resonated with me so much. I set myself a target to save 20% of my takehome pay just as a challenge. It's coming to the end of Jan and I am proud that I am more conscious of my spending habits and might JUST meet my target! one thing that helped was reading - i fell into the ACoTaR and Crescent City rabbit hole and they kept me so preoccupied that I had no time or the inclination to go shop. I shop out of boredom and now that I found the solution, i will be shopping for books instead ❤
It's so funny, the ad break I got in the middle of the video is "Sephora sale !!!" I've been trying to buy less as well. Like you, I spend too much time browsing just for the sake of it. I also resisted buying the I need a nude from ND; it was on sale at Sephora (which never happens in my country at all), but I know I have too much eyeshadow to use already, I know it would end up taking too much space in my drawer and therefore wouldn't be used because it would sit a the back/bottom... I still put it in my cart, thought about the shipping method before stopping myself. It's HARD
Hannah, Thank you for this: “ I don’t need any of them. The end.” This will help me so much when I am tempted to shop just to entertain myself, distract myself, or procrastinate.❤
I will say, I also had a struggle with it this week. It's also the time of year where I just want to nest, so all of my shopping compulsions have been to gather the cozy essential things I need around me (ie. shopping for 100% flannel cotton nightgowns, wide leg sweatpants/lounge pants, winter skincare, candles). It's very difficult to say no to that, but being in the moment is KEY nesting behaviour, also. I say this to remind myself of that.
I’m doing a makeup/skincare no-buy and a clothing low buy (one 1 item in per month) this year and I’ve started experiencing some frustration and also the relief of the automatic no! Excited for the rest of the year!
Thank you for sharing all the struggles and insights. I find I have to be wary of these same things - not so much with shopping behaviors (thought I should examine that more thoroughly) - but in other areas. When I have work I need to do and even want to do, but am stymied for one reason or another, I often fill my time with GOOD things - study or connection or another form of work - anything BUT the real work I need to do at the time. Sometimes this is my brain working through creative solutions and sometimes it's detrimental and causes me a great deal of stress. Being gentle with myself and learning to observe when the detrimental form is happening is a place I continually revisit on the spiral. I hope that your 'processing' comes more easily as you journey.
Screen-free in the morning makes such a difference, I'm working on that for every day at the moment. I have also noticed and begun to face the thoughts and feelings that all the distractions cleverly distract me from ❤
I have joined an accountability zoom group. It’s supposed to get us to face whatever is that we r avoiding and completing tasks and goals. This type of video feels like the very sort of thing that would go hand in hand with what we r trying to achieve! 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
This is so interesting! The urgent response you describe is definitely a new thing with online shopping and I hate that I experience it so frequently. Trying to limit myself too. My past consumerism was gross.❤
What an interesting concept! The moment I get up and start getting ready for work my audiobook gets turned on. I never thought about that it's a way of ignoring what I really need to process... idk if I could turn it off! Great job girl
I edit my bookmarks from time to time. There will be one or two things that I can delete because I bought them, but more often I delete items that I liked when I first saw them but have no interest in by the time I edit. Building in that pause is so helpful, I think.
I'm so excited for the tinted lip balm video!! It's all I've been using lately. I find lipstick gets funky on my lips after a few hours, so I've been searching for balms that fade beautifully. Olio e osso in the color current is one of my new favorites.
I'm listening to your lovely voice in the background as motivation while I declutter half of my closet and clothing. I decided that I will buy from sustainable brands or means only, starting this year -- thrifting or researching online brands that are not fast fashion. I've definitely been trying to fill the empty space in my mind and life with shopping. I just made two big purchases with Stitch Fix and Cider, both brands/company models with trendy but low-quality clothing items and murky sustainability practices - I am returning every item, and instead getting refamiliarized with the items I already have and letting go of the ones that I don't love!
Such a great discussion here in the comments. I apologize if this is a repeat suggestion. While you can unsubscribe from brand emails you might also: 1. Create a separate email that is only for that stuff or 2. Create rules in your inbox to immediately shuttle those emails into a folder. It allows you to stay subscribed but keeps these emails out of sight (and hopefully out of mind). Then, when you do want to make a purchase, you can go check out what’s new in that brand inbox/folder. Plus you can comfortably just delete everything more than 30 days old in that folder/inbox. Helps me a lot.
I love how you talk us through your thinking. It’s so inspiring. Also, I love Old Spice Fiji as my main deodorant, but having a scent that you dislike and smelling it all day is a reasonable thing to really want to avoid.
i hope you’re doing okay (with regard to what you mentioned you had been processing lately). i respect not being able to talk about it yet, i only hope you’re well or on a good path when processing your struggles. and if you so decide to talk about it eventually on here, then i’ll be more than happy to listen (and potentially offer a word or two of encouragement). wishing you the best hannah!
Thanks, Hannah! I am currently in between items that we will use in our new home & saving money/space by not buying anymore clothes, accessories, shoes, decor & books after a major (...a full back of pickup truck three kinds!) downsizing before moving cross-country. 😊❤
This is such a good reminder to me that taking a pause to see if I'm still interested in something. I often feel such a drive to get chores done when I have the energy, but it's important for me to not use that energy for buying things!
10th view? could it be possible!! hi Hannah! I love your channel and your words. I can't wait to get your book in the mail. I'm doing a no-buy (inspired by you!) and it'll be a fun treat while I'm not buying books :)
The irony of me watching this as I get ready in the morning and you talking about staying away from your phone for as long as possible in the morning doesn't escape me 🙄😬
I think a lot of credit comes from your videos, but I thoroughly enjoy window online shopping and never checking out. I have found I am going less and less towards wanting to actually browse these days, but when I do I have no interest in actually buying.. But the experience of browsing and window shopping brings me all the joy. Just took me awhile to realise I don't need the thing to have the feeling! Everyone is obviously different and I am excited for this project for you.
Love this introspection! Consumer behavior was my favorite class in college but I was firmly on the "help consumers not be tricked into buying stuff"-side instead of the "help companies trick people into buying stuff"-side, so it didn't become the career I'd hoped for, lol. This kind of thought process is so fun to hear about! My January project every year is to buy only produce at the grocery store, and to clean out my freezer, fridge and pantry. I love cooking so it becomes a fun cooking challenge and helps me use up items that might have been out of sight. Next month I'm going to challenge myself to use up some of the many spice blends I have!
I love the thought of you reading languorously throughout the days...ahhh,...to be a young girl with summers ahead to be spent in such a spell.... My dreams, as Annie Lennox recalls, "from the gracious days."
So many points in the video have resonated with me. But I didnt realize what shopping had been providing me emotionally and mentally until listening to this. One thing though, is that I can’t think of other things I'd rather do on the weekend. You know how people always say, "Be present. Be in the now"? Well, thats hard when the present sucks and the now is boring. Which is when I turn to researching stuff. My hobbies are challenging. Shopping isn't challenging in the same way. My kids are growing up and going to college. My health isnt improving as quickly as I want it to- and new stuff always pops up. So I guess what I enjoy doing is escaping.
It is SO helpful to hear you walk through your coping mechanism observations each day. The journaling of your observations is so valuable, and it has felt too unknown to me to apply it to myself without seeing it demonstrated first. Thank you!!
My friends and I are doing a no-buy! One of the group members is an attorney and she drafted up this hilarious contract that we all signed, and includes provisions such as the "birthday suit", where we can buy ourselves a little something during our birthday month. We have a spreadsheet where we're keeping track of everything. I haven't broken mine at all yet, despite carving out an exception for myself to get one or two more work-appropriate knits. I find that despite the hole in my wardrobe I just don't care as much about shopping! It feels liberating.
Love the no shopping Monday to Friday rule!! I did just pick up some skincare replacements (and today is Thursday!) but one to consider moving forward definitely 😃
This project has been my favorite of your entire channel! It's such a simple premise, but it feels like the most challenging and personal of all your past buying projects. It has made me take a look at my own shopping behavior and maybe I will one day take on this challenge too! Cheers, Hannah, thank you for the work that you do!
I'm in no way a healthcare professional, but I do struggle with mental health issues & I personally feel like if compulsive novel reading is your biggest worry right now? You're doing great! 🫶
This year I really want to reduce my levels of procrastination. I find this video series really inspiring. I do understand I’m procrastinating to avoid difficult tasks, tough decisions, and possibly confronting regret and other hard emotions. Thanks for all your insights and sharing yourself with us in this deep way.
The type of self analysis you do is so beautiful and inspiring. I’m going through a tough time in life right now and hearing your honest and generous interpretation of your own behavior and psyche is helping me be more kind and generous with myself ❤
I am *so* excited to see you talk about tinted lip balms (and hoping for drugstore priced suggestions as I really want something to free me from repurchasing the Nars one in Fast Lane at what feels like ten minute intervals!)
This was so refreshing to listen to, I really resonate with the sentiment behind the project you’re doing. I find that I’ll turn to reviews or browsing when my mind feels cluttered and foggy with the intention to decompress and in reality it’s preventing me from doing so and allowing my stress to build unnecessarily. I listened to this while doing a task I’ve been putting off for a week and I’m inspired to try to implement a similar goal for myself. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Love your feedback on this topic. ❤️I’m doing no buy January and is it just me or is this theeeee longest month ever?!?! I’m having a hard time so watching content knowing I’m not alone is comforting. Thanks for another amazing video Hannah!
I’m on a similar journey this year. And as a former teacher: Reading of any kind counts! We are allowed to enjoy what we read or try something else out if we like. That’s the beauty of it 😊 good for you for reducing your screen and shopping time, I wish you well on it 💗
Oh Hannah, I love how I am almost 20 years younger than you and yet, here we are having almost exactly the same problem. For me, it is social media that I use as a GIANT distraction throughout the day. I especially resonated how you said you felt like reading immediately replaced this habit because you are avoiding processing something that would come up otherwise. I, too, want to make space to temporarily feel bad about something. I want to make space to face this discomfort so that hopefully, I can resolve it finally. You have inspired me to keep trying and to embrace this thing in my subconcious that is wrecking my life! You remind me so much of my big sister, by the way. She is 42 this year and you two have so much in common! ❤
Hannah, thank you for sharing your experience and struggles! recently I've found that binge-consuming content became a problem for me and I use it to avoid facing pretty much everything. diving into other people's lives or fictional stories makes me "busy" to live my own life. it is a very sad reality, even writing this down hurts rn(( but)) you're giving me a motivation to do what I want to do - develop some rules around the topic, make an effort to stick to those and give myself a lot of compassion in the process because I kinda realize where the problem comes from and it's not pretty. listening you talk about it really helps me and I'm grateful for your kind approach 💜
I just want to say how much I appreciate you being so vulnerable and honest about your shopping behaviors, Hannah. I think that’s probably way harder than you make it look. Not only is it very interesting to hear about your experiences, this video also made me realize some things about my own behavior. So thank you, Hannah!
Fascinating video! I love how you analyzed the true reason why you were browsing/researching/shopping and what purpose it served. Made me reevaluate what habits I do that are in the same category (probably watching youtube :P)
I deliberately didn't share which books I'm reading because they're kind of trashy and I'm embarrassed. But I will confess in an upcoming "what's cheering me up right now"
I also have been reading embarrassing novels on kindle unlimited. I'm always worried someone is going to lean over and ask what I'm reading lol
Lmao Hannah
I just found out from a book of essays I'm reading tonight that my favourite author was also a big fan not only of Austen, which is well known, but Elizabeth Jane Howard, who I thought was my own discovery.
Also any book which brings joy is creditable. I just finished a Georgette Heyer murder mystery: she's brilliant but the book was pretty by numbers, I still enjoyed it.
I want trashy, can't wait lol
please spill the tea lol@@sabrinaa8948
Something I realized is that when I think wow I need another one of this item, I'm actually just realizing that I'm appreciating the item. There's no lack, I have the thing that I need. I just need to reframe that as gratitude for a great thing instead of trying to get more of it
This is SO helpful
Agreed. I also think my fear of it not being enough in those moments would be assuaged if I remembered that I also put energy into mindlfully caring for my favourite things and learning how to mend them.
Wow this is so true! I never thought of this feeling like that before and it totally makes sense and feels like a huge relief!
Yes! Thank you for this comment. Finally can understand how I was feeling
Wow! I looove this reframe! And it’s also so true! Thank you 🙏🏻
I am loving this content. I realize that so much of my shopping behavior is because it tricks my brain into thinking I’m solving a problem, thus in control of (one part of) my life. But now whenever life feels overwhelming my thought is “Go research a purchase that will solve this.” And the reality is, most purchases don’t solve my life.
What you're going through with shopping, I'm going through with TH-cam. I think I'm using extreme TH-cam watching to avoid dealing with things. Thanks for this video, it's given me a lot to think about!
Meeeee too…..
I feel this! So I’m declutter my internet life ( emails, social media and You Tube subscriptions). Simplifying life is like the way I want to walk. Good job in your journey!
Me too! When Hannah put out the first video on this project, I thought I'd try the same but with TH-cam videos. Turns out, most of the videos I watched were just uninteresting to me on Sundays...I was just watching them to procrastinate work and not let myself actually unwind in the spare moments. (A couple of thoughtful videos will still likely make it into my weekend watch list. But that's a whole different reality from my previous usual.)
Something I’ve also been going through also. I realized is actually a lack of contentment. And frustration with work, which unfortunately extremely difficult to change. So I have been focusing on what’s good in my life, and has helped a lot with not numbing out, rather than being present, in my life such as it is.
same here(( good luck in your process!
This struck me today while I was listening: I really appreciate that you call this a "project" instead of a "challenge."
A "project" feels like an intellectual activity, something that's new to you that you're approaching with curiosity (science fair project). The word "challenge" implies a real stretch, something that is quite hard to complete and perhaps will even be punishing to your body (cinnamon challenge). Gamification in the classroom is meant to build student engagement, but calling everything we do a "challenge" might have unintended consequences if the word carries these subtle negative messages!
I also feel like a challenge implies something that one may or may not complete, whereas with a project, it's like "I'm doing this"
Challenge definitely has obstacle or possible failure connotation compared to project which is a work in progress, something to work on to improve something, where failure isn’t an option because as long as you learn something, you’ve accomplished something.
Something that I just realized while in the middle of watching your video is that shopping is one of the easiest methods I have for exercising control in my life. To me it represents autonomy - I've put in the time researching a thing I want, have deliberated and made a decision on which exact item I'm going to buy, use my own money to buy it, have the thing and enjoy it, and no one can say anything about it lol. Maybe this largely stems from my dysfunctional upbringing of instability and scarcity, in which I felt almost completely out of control of what happened to me, but I find shopping to be very positive and empowering. This can make it far more difficult for me to minimize my unnecessary shopping, because nearly any purchase can feel therapeutic and provide me with a sense of autonomy I never had.
Girl. That could have been me writing your comment. xo
PREACH.
Here because of the most recent "Read Comments With Me" video to applaud you! I feel so seen 🤗
I'm glad that overall, the aspect of asserting control over your life through deliberate purchases is so positive for you. This is what I aspire to, too! Personally, I feel like there is still a big disfunctional component to it (for me), as I seem to shop for a "quick fix" of my life, trying to evoke the temporary feeling of control rather often. At least I notice a link between situations of feeling "not where I thought I should be at this time in my life" and the urge to upgrade my interior or flaunt a new handbag. So much growth ahead of me! ❤
Thank you for bringing this up. It has shed more light onto my shopping tendencies. For me, it was the thrill of the purchase itself. It didn't matter if I needed it or not. I had the power to buy whatever I wanted. I have learned a lot along my no buy journey this year.
HOW is every hair era for you so perfect and uniquely gorgeous? 😎 It’s amazing.
😭
My brain totally loves a deeeeeep dive into researching and finding the “best” thing and then giving up entirely once I find it 😂 such a time suck. I think I’m going to join you on this journey!
I have also had to make a concerted effort to unsubscribe from the constant barrage of emails from my favourite brands... I really appreciate these conversations, these self-studies in how we use the internet to escape. It's very interesting to acknowledge how the browsing, the research, the clicking, seeps into our thoughts on a daily, hourly, momentary basis. I'm not judging it, but I do feel this study is important as we look at ourselves, our desire for a better quality of life, and what that actually looks like. Thanks for this post :-)
I don’t think I clocked my browsing as an escapist habit until you verbalized it! It crops up so often during the workday when the level (or type) of work induces anxiety.
I have found that Pinterest has been helpful in terms of “setting and forgetting” whatever I keep circling back to. Something about knowing I’ve filed it away helps. I’ll have to try restricting shopping around to the weekends!
I would totally recommend everyone who enjoyed this video think about reading The Year of Less! The author goes into detail about her no buy year and how she realized shopping was totally an emotional habit for her- a distraction or coping mechanism. (She does also mention her journeys with sobriety and dealing with binge eating, in case thats problematic to read about for some)
I'm gonna check it out thank you
Great book, recommend too
The reading thing is so interesting to me. I catch myself feeling really guilty for reading "too much" some days (i.e. feels like it's getting in the way of productivity), but I've realized that actually at this moment in my life right now it's a really healthy way of taking care of myself. Yes, maybe I'm not utilizing the day to its full potential, yes, maybe I'm distracting myself from my own thoughts, but it's a passion of mine. I love reading. I love books. It's not actively hurting me. I'm working on the reason in other ways (therapy is great), so I can give myself a break with this one.
I finally (many years after first seeing your No Buy Year video) have put myself on a no-buy year. The sense of mental relief I feel when I realize I don't even need to browse because I can't buy anyway is huge! I feel like I have so much of my time back, and so much more mental energy to spend on what is really important to me, how I consume, and what I actually need in my life. Thank you for these videos!
The quality of the comments under this video is insane! One can tell by reading them alone that you hit a nerve on this one. Beautiful video (and comments)!
You could set aside work time at the end of Friday for work related purchases. That way the pattern of waiting to do shopping behaviors is still in place, but work time and off time are separated.
So much food for thought here! My 2024 project is tackling those nodes of stuck Chi I see in my life: continuing 2023's Swedish death cleaning of my stuff, confronting decades-old bad sleep hygiene, adding lean muscle mass.
I love reading. I read hundreds of books a year. But my last postpartum recovery led to excessive reading that I know now was a manifestation of postpartum depression. (I mean I read 2-3 books a day, it was BAD.) Reading is such a joy. And you can read like it’s your full time job and that not be unhealthy. But I know that it can be an unhealthy method of avoidance for me. And it can be my favorite form of entertainment. Both can be true. It’s up to me to find the right balance for my current season of life. ♥️♥️♥️
Thank you, I am so with you, people don't get it that even reading can be a way I numb.
This is so interesting. I had a bit of a compulsive reading habit in the first months after the birth of my daughter. For me it felt like reading was a indispensable way of turning inward and recharching my introvert batteries that were quite drained by the constant attention given to my baby. But this put a different perspective on it.
@@MrClairemary I completely agree. And that did make a big difference in how I handled that round of postpartum. (In a good and healthy way.) But I know for ME I was combative and angry when loved ones suggested that maybe I was reading a little too much. And now being several years removed from it I can see why. Even though I still use reading to recharge my battery. 🥰
I was interested to see how this journey went for you, now I’m really tempted to do it myself. Listening you describe how I you were using it as an escape makes me realize how I use internet browsing as a weird kind of cleaning or gardening that requires no physical effort. I make lists, check bookmarks, monitor sales, and get a weird sense of satisfaction that I would normally get from tending real things in real life.
So many people do this with games like SIMS and Animal Crossing
So many people do this with games like SIMS and Animal Crossing
"my closet is what's wrong with my life." 😭 such a first world problem and I just realized as you said that this is exactly how I've been feeling lately and how really untrue it is on so many levels if I am honest with myself. Thanks for sharing!
“Do you need this or do you need to be at home doing laundry?” Is a life changing question. I work at home and often “shop” to get out of the house. I love listening you talk about this, Hannah. It helps my brain a lot.
I had a torn ACL during covid so I had a long lead up time to my operation. I just couldn’t do much physically and like most people, I get kinda melancholy when I don’t have something productive to do. I turned to learning things on TH-cam. I’d listen to hours long lectures on Very Smart Things and such. And of course there’s a lot of fun and entertaining things as well …. Then there was the recouping post surgery and the long months of rehab. I was more active again but still limited. Anyhow … I’m absolutely fine now. Strong as a horse. And I’m back to being active and getting stuff done but I have to have something on. A podcast or even just videos of other people doing the thing I’m engaged in doing …. It’s so weird lol. I used to be an avid reader but I find I have a serious case of FOMO re the channels I follow here and my books just sit there until I binge them before their due back at the library 🙄. I’ve started slow. Something as simple as when I take my walk in the morning, I’m not listening to anything. No music, no podcasts, no audio books. Just walking and being with my own thoughts. It’s crazy how our brains can mess with us lol. I didn’t even want to listen to this one (I was cooking dinner … cause I can’t possibly cook dinner without listening to another human talking apparently 😂) because I knew it would make me feel all squirmy inside … but I’m grateful for this vulnerable and honest sharing, Hannah. I’m not alone. We’re all struggling with something like this and it doesn’t make us “bad” it makes us human. We just want to be humans who are a little free’r on the inside and I’m thankful for all y’all out there ❤
I mentioned that phone locking device thingy that I bought and I have no regrets. I lock my phone away at 5p once we are all home from school/work. It's wild how many times I reached for it the first few days - to check the weather, to look up the definition of a word, and because it's just habit. I finished the two books I had been reading for months, went on two runs, but most importantly I just hung out undistracted with my husband and son. HOWEVER, I also feel like my shopping was covering up some things and after almost 3 months on the no-buy I signed up for therapy ha.
It's also wild how the urge to declutter is looming large. I now feel like my life is full to the brim with stuff I don't need. What IS that? I didn't feel that way when I was shopping all the time. So interesting.
thank you for sharing this, Tina! Incredible. You are experiencing a lot of what I went through during my no-buy, too
Gosh, I just love these types of videos you share! They’re always so thoughtful and thought-provoking.
Though I don’t over shop, I am realizing hearing you talk about how you put things on a list to look up later only to find later that it isn’t all that pressing or compelling makes me realize how often I turn to this little computer in my pocket to look up anything when it crosses my mind. Not that there’s anything wrong with wanting to know when the gym closes or looking up a book review, but this video makes me wonder whether the instant gratification of knowing is really serving me, or whether I could make a list and check everything later, and stay present with the wondering in the meantime.
Your comments about not allowing space for things to bubble up hit me so hard. This is absolutely something I do. Shopping isn't really my thing, but being on my phone in general is absolutely a distraction from organically feeling my feelings. But like you, I want those emotions to bubble up so that I can heal. This video (and project generally) is really resonating with me and making me think about creating my own project of a similar sorts. I love the pie chart metaphor and I'm thinking that will be where I start. I want to understand what fills up my chart and discern what is distracting and what actually brings me joy. As a masters student, procrastination and burnout are a cyclical nightmare, so I think something like what you are doing will be an amazing way for me to gently start addressing my needs. Thank you, Hannah, for making this video and being so honest about your process. You truly are an inspiration ❤
Holy. Cow. The connection you made from the compulsion to want to shop during the week to the availability to but aversion from actually doing it on the weekend was so insightful. Identifying THAT as a coping mechanism as you said… what a connection. Never thought of it like that! So insightful.
I love a day where I can spend mostly reading😊 and I love starting the morning with a hot beverage and a book.
On Gmail there is a way to automatically send all emails with certain terms in them like "unsubscribe" directly to trash or junk. Just make sure you catalogue which emails you might get with that word that are important so you can designate them as exceptions, like emails from your bank, or airlines, etc.
The fact that reading could also be kind of toxic blows my mind. What I thought was the end goal - to read instead of scrolling - could also be a sort of escape. This idea blew my mind. And I can see the reasoning behind it but I also think that you don't need to be so hard on yoirself. Maybe scheduling a time for reading would help? I am relatively new so I don't know if you like to schedule your day or not.
*yourself
I kept a list this week as well to capture all the demands my brain attempts on my bank account-for totally emotional reasons. This weekend most of the fervor has faded. I too binge read in a wildly deep way, when I “just can’t” with day to day tasks. Interesting area for further inquiry. Thanks for being so open with your wondering and practices.
You’re insights are simple and revolutionary. You’re brilliant. Thank you for taking extra good care of yourself and then teaching us how to do the same.❤
I am feeling this challenge! As of today, I have decided to try and do this with you. A couple things I’m thinking of trying: 1. I’m using Indyx to catalogue my wardrobe so that instead of shopping I’m tempted to look at my own wardrobe instead. 2. I’m starting a separate wishlist of “wishlist to shop for”.
I think your brain and body are protecting you until you’re psychologically/materially safe to deal with whatever your issue is. Don’t rush it. If novel reading works as well as shopping, all the better. As long as it’s a non damaging coping mechanism, fine. We’re not ready to unpack and confront everything at any time.
I started doing something similar in 2022, where I can only spend during the first 5 days of the month, and more specifically I can only spend the amount remaining on my pre-paid card from the previous month. I also have a few additional rules, like no shipping after 8pm and no buying anything that'd not been in my cart or wishlist for at least 24 hours and so on. This has been working so well on so many levels that I still stick to it like 10 months a year. 😊
I'm reading so many comments about shopping being something that gives someone a sense of control and it made me realize that I absolutely do this. I'm usually pretty good when it comes to shopping and haven't really bought anything since the holiday season, but this week something that was out of my control happened and by "coincidence" I bought a lot of things this week, some that I actually needed, some that I didn't, and even stuff for other people that I was procrastinating on.
After just making the conection I will be taking the next days to reflect on my use of shopping and browsing as a disassociating mechanism and a way to take control over my life in momens I feel I don't have any.
Your self awareness and raw honesty are so refreshing!!! Your videos always leave me feeling called out and comforted at the same time. You're the brutal honest budget friend I need in my life!! 😂🙌💖
I have the very opposite problem, I browse because I THINK I have nothing else to do. I'm disabled, along with a hefty dose of ADHD, browsing gives me the chance to stare into the neverending void of things I love. BUT, it keeps me so engaged that I don't know how long I've been scrolling, the fun of time blindness. I need to focus on the things I need to get done when I am feeling up to it & not let my propensity to distract myself take over. I have enough trouble fighting my executive dysfunction & shopping is part of that cycle. I hadn't thought about that until I got around to watching your intro video earlier.
i've had a rather small wardrobe in the past & in 2023 i decided i wanted to elevate it with more variety. i now have ~45 clothing items & it is plenty! i know that i need to slow my roll, because poshmark is somewhat addictive. i've set a 6mo clothing no-buy. so far, so good.
I've developed a browsing issue over the past year and it's become asphyxiating because it's sucking my time and my soul...thank you brain for wanting to soothe me of my anxieties but stopppppp. Or rather, I need to say "it's okay, I got this" These videos came at the perfect time for me as I too am working to revamp my schedule to be productive in my work as well as do what I need to get done in "real life" each day. The call of distraction the second a doubt hits is incredible. Is this a muscle we need to exercise to get stronger in saying "no, it's okay, another time"? I think so. I'm so grateful for this series from you and Let's do this! Loved your update.
Hi Hannah, always uniquely fascinating though I do not always understand. I think Brains (at least mine) want what they want when they want it and then if they cannot get it, they just turn it off and stop wanting it. It is just “too late” so in many ways it pouts and finds something else it can have (i.e. reading) which it could get. I think a person should have desires or a safe place to put them so you do not lose that fire and passion for them… once a person turns off a desire it turns off “the wild” … but I get that training a brain into a fine cultivated machine is very important. ❤❤❤ Heart for all you do! Like Marilla to Anne Shirley, “save a little time for romance”….
Browsing and reading (and binge eatign) to disassociate/cope is something i'm embarrasingly familiar with. Especially when i was postpartum.
A weird thing happens to me when I watch your videos: I always tend to go into my wish lists on apps, and I keep adding/removing/curating the lists or the carts or SOMETHING. It’s as if you immediately make me want to think about the items a bit more.
Also, re: subscription/brand emails…if you use outlook, you can create a folder and a rule in which those specific emails (usually “brand-no reply@ blah blah blah) can be automatically sent to a separate folder in your inbox. And you can set it up and let it roll. All of my Ulta/Sephora/airline/etc emails go there. It’s AMAZING and extremely helpful for productivity.
In the past, I had a huge collection of clothes, truly beautiful pieces but I pretty much only wore like 20% of it... so I kept the things I really liked and was actively wearing and donated the rest. This was in early 2021... and now, 3 years later, the clothes I kept are starting to be worn out and/or stained, to the point I don't feel as polished as I want to.
I have to go shopping for some clothes and I will try investing in good quality ones - since I'm getting only a few pieces, it will be fine. HOWEVER I still need to be conscious about traps like the whole 'putting in the cart just in case', research, try ons, etc.
Your videos are so helpful to be more insightful in these moments, thank you so much for sharing your experiences and strategies 💙
You are so right Hannah! The allure of the magical thing. Rarely does anything I buy feel as exciting as when I first discover it and start searching online for it. Why do I think I can shop away every emotional gap I have in my life or solve every problem?
Novel reading is fine!! I’ll go through bouts of binge reading, but then not read for weeks. Sometimes you need to go with what your mind says it needs. ( As an author I might be biased-lol.). Love your channel!!
I love your imitation of your brain as a bratty teenager. Mine is that a lot, when it’s not being a toddler throwing a tantrum and yelling, “I don’t wanna!” 🤎🤎🤎
My theory is your need for stimulation, excitement, interest and depth was already fulfilled by hanging out with your friend. I know for me the more time I spend doing things with friends, the less I need to shop.
This video resonated with me so much. I set myself a target to save 20% of my takehome pay just as a challenge. It's coming to the end of Jan and I am proud that I am more conscious of my spending habits and might JUST meet my target! one thing that helped was reading - i fell into the ACoTaR and Crescent City rabbit hole and they kept me so preoccupied that I had no time or the inclination to go shop. I shop out of boredom and now that I found the solution, i will be shopping for books instead ❤
It's so funny, the ad break I got in the middle of the video is "Sephora sale !!!"
I've been trying to buy less as well. Like you, I spend too much time browsing just for the sake of it. I also resisted buying the I need a nude from ND; it was on sale at Sephora (which never happens in my country at all), but I know I have too much eyeshadow to use already, I know it would end up taking too much space in my drawer and therefore wouldn't be used because it would sit a the back/bottom... I still put it in my cart, thought about the shipping method before stopping myself. It's HARD
Hannah, Thank you for this: “ I don’t need any of them. The end.” This will help me so much when I am tempted to shop just to entertain myself, distract myself, or procrastinate.❤
I will say, I also had a struggle with it this week. It's also the time of year where I just want to nest, so all of my shopping compulsions have been to gather the cozy essential things I need around me (ie. shopping for 100% flannel cotton nightgowns, wide leg sweatpants/lounge pants, winter skincare, candles). It's very difficult to say no to that, but being in the moment is KEY nesting behaviour, also. I say this to remind myself of that.
I’m doing a makeup/skincare no-buy and a clothing low buy (one 1 item in per month) this year and I’ve started experiencing some frustration and also the relief of the automatic no! Excited for the rest of the year!
I’m such a ‘shopper’ I literally was browsing your background like ooh that’s a cool lamp. Nice chair etc 😅 God help me.
Thank you for sharing all the struggles and insights. I find I have to be wary of these same things - not so much with shopping behaviors (thought I should examine that more thoroughly) - but in other areas. When I have work I need to do and even want to do, but am stymied for one reason or another, I often fill my time with GOOD things - study or connection or another form of work - anything BUT the real work I need to do at the time. Sometimes this is my brain working through creative solutions and sometimes it's detrimental and causes me a great deal of stress. Being gentle with myself and learning to observe when the detrimental form is happening is a place I continually revisit on the spiral. I hope that your 'processing' comes more easily as you journey.
Screen-free in the morning makes such a difference, I'm working on that for every day at the moment. I have also noticed and begun to face the thoughts and feelings that all the distractions cleverly distract me from ❤
I have joined an accountability zoom group. It’s supposed to get us to face whatever is that we r avoiding and completing tasks and goals. This type of video feels like the very sort of thing that would go hand in hand with what we r trying to achieve! 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
This is so interesting! The urgent response you describe is definitely a new thing with online shopping and I hate that I experience it so frequently. Trying to limit myself too. My past consumerism was gross.❤
i never get tired of listening to you! you have such a way with story-telling and analyzing, it's very interesting to listen to. And you inspire me!
What an interesting concept! The moment I get up and start getting ready for work my audiobook gets turned on. I never thought about that it's a way of ignoring what I really need to process... idk if I could turn it off! Great job girl
I edit my bookmarks from time to time. There will be one or two things that I can delete because I bought them, but more often I delete items that I liked when I first saw them but have no interest in by the time I edit. Building in that pause is so helpful, I think.
This is the most relatable video I have seen in a long time. Your honesty and transparency are refreshing.
Hi hannah!! Ive been trying to think less about buying stuff, so Im browsing for shopping only in the weekends too, its been quite helpful for me ❤
I'm so excited for the tinted lip balm video!! It's all I've been using lately. I find lipstick gets funky on my lips after a few hours, so I've been searching for balms that fade beautifully. Olio e osso in the color current is one of my new favorites.
I need to do this with video games 😭 thank you for the reluctant inspiration
I'm listening to your lovely voice in the background as motivation while I declutter half of my closet and clothing. I decided that I will buy from sustainable brands or means only, starting this year -- thrifting or researching online brands that are not fast fashion. I've definitely been trying to fill the empty space in my mind and life with shopping. I just made two big purchases with Stitch Fix and Cider, both brands/company models with trendy but low-quality clothing items and murky sustainability practices - I am returning every item, and instead getting refamiliarized with the items I already have and letting go of the ones that I don't love!
Such a great discussion here in the comments. I apologize if this is a repeat suggestion. While you can unsubscribe from brand emails you might also: 1. Create a separate email that is only for that stuff or 2. Create rules in your inbox to immediately shuttle those emails into a folder. It allows you to stay subscribed but keeps these emails out of sight (and hopefully out of mind). Then, when you do want to make a purchase, you can go check out what’s new in that brand inbox/folder. Plus you can comfortably just delete everything more than 30 days old in that folder/inbox. Helps me a lot.
That would reduce my overflowing inbox tremendously. That’s a great idea.
I love how you talk us through your thinking. It’s so inspiring. Also, I love Old Spice Fiji as my main deodorant, but having a scent that you dislike and smelling it all day is a reasonable thing to really want to avoid.
I'm so excited for the lip balm review
i hope you’re doing okay (with regard to what you mentioned you had been processing lately). i respect not being able to talk about it yet, i only hope you’re well or on a good path when processing your struggles. and if you so decide to talk about it eventually on here, then i’ll be more than happy to listen (and potentially offer a word or two of encouragement). wishing you the best hannah!
Thanks, Hannah! I am currently in between items that we will use in our new home & saving money/space by not buying anymore clothes, accessories, shoes, decor & books after a major (...a full back of pickup truck three kinds!) downsizing before moving cross-country. 😊❤
This is such a good reminder to me that taking a pause to see if I'm still interested in something. I often feel such a drive to get chores done when I have the energy, but it's important for me to not use that energy for buying things!
10th view? could it be possible!! hi Hannah! I love your channel and your words. I can't wait to get your book in the mail. I'm doing a no-buy (inspired by you!) and it'll be a fun treat while I'm not buying books :)
The irony of me watching this as I get ready in the morning and you talking about staying away from your phone for as long as possible in the morning doesn't escape me 🙄😬
I think a lot of credit comes from your videos, but I thoroughly enjoy window online shopping and never checking out. I have found I am going less and less towards wanting to actually browse these days, but when I do I have no interest in actually buying.. But the experience of browsing and window shopping brings me all the joy. Just took me awhile to realise I don't need the thing to have the feeling! Everyone is obviously different and I am excited for this project for you.
Love this introspection! Consumer behavior was my favorite class in college but I was firmly on the "help consumers not be tricked into buying stuff"-side instead of the "help companies trick people into buying stuff"-side, so it didn't become the career I'd hoped for, lol. This kind of thought process is so fun to hear about! My January project every year is to buy only produce at the grocery store, and to clean out my freezer, fridge and pantry. I love cooking so it becomes a fun cooking challenge and helps me use up items that might have been out of sight. Next month I'm going to challenge myself to use up some of the many spice blends I have!
I love the thought of you reading languorously throughout the days...ahhh,...to be a young girl with summers ahead to be spent in such a spell.... My dreams, as Annie Lennox recalls, "from the gracious days."
So many points in the video have resonated with me. But I didnt realize what shopping had been providing me emotionally and mentally until listening to this. One thing though, is that I can’t think of other things I'd rather do on the weekend. You know how people always say, "Be present. Be in the now"? Well, thats hard when the present sucks and the now is boring. Which is when I turn to researching stuff. My hobbies are challenging. Shopping isn't challenging in the same way. My kids are growing up and going to college. My health isnt improving as quickly as I want it to- and new stuff always pops up. So I guess what I enjoy doing is escaping.
oh man I'm trying to not buy beauty products. my online browse shopping is keeping me from doing so much so this resonates with me strongly.
It is SO helpful to hear you walk through your coping mechanism observations each day. The journaling of your observations is so valuable, and it has felt too unknown to me to apply it to myself without seeing it demonstrated first. Thank you!!
My friends and I are doing a no-buy! One of the group members is an attorney and she drafted up this hilarious contract that we all signed, and includes provisions such as the "birthday suit", where we can buy ourselves a little something during our birthday month. We have a spreadsheet where we're keeping track of everything. I haven't broken mine at all yet, despite carving out an exception for myself to get one or two more work-appropriate knits. I find that despite the hole in my wardrobe I just don't care as much about shopping! It feels liberating.
Love the no shopping Monday to Friday rule!! I did just pick up some skincare replacements (and today is Thursday!) but one to consider moving forward definitely 😃
Incredibly timely!
This project has been my favorite of your entire channel! It's such a simple premise, but it feels like the most challenging and personal of all your past buying projects. It has made me take a look at my own shopping behavior and maybe I will one day take on this challenge too! Cheers, Hannah, thank you for the work that you do!
I'm in no way a healthcare professional, but I do struggle with mental health issues & I personally feel like if compulsive novel reading is your biggest worry right now? You're doing great! 🫶
:)
I watch these videos and occasionally there's one that changes my life for a better life. Thank you.
I'm really loving the minimal makeup look + the scrumptious sweater, you look amazing!
This year I really want to reduce my levels of procrastination. I find this video series really inspiring. I do understand I’m procrastinating to avoid difficult tasks, tough decisions, and possibly confronting regret and other hard emotions. Thanks for all your insights and sharing yourself with us in this deep way.
The type of self analysis you do is so beautiful and inspiring. I’m going through a tough time in life right now and hearing your honest and generous interpretation of your own behavior and psyche is helping me be more kind and generous with myself ❤
I am *so* excited to see you talk about tinted lip balms (and hoping for drugstore priced suggestions as I really want something to free me from repurchasing the Nars one in Fast Lane at what feels like ten minute intervals!)
This was so refreshing to listen to, I really resonate with the sentiment behind the project you’re doing. I find that I’ll turn to reviews or browsing when my mind feels cluttered and foggy with the intention to decompress and in reality it’s preventing me from doing so and allowing my stress to build unnecessarily. I listened to this while doing a task I’ve been putting off for a week and I’m inspired to try to implement a similar goal for myself. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Love your feedback on this topic. ❤️I’m doing no buy January and is it just me or is this theeeee longest month ever?!?! I’m having a hard time so watching content knowing I’m not alone is comforting. Thanks for another amazing video Hannah!
I've also been spending way less time browsing and I've noticed a huge difference on my spending! Thank you for sharing this journey with us!
This is how I feel too! Needing a break from work is something I look forward.
I’m on a similar journey this year. And as a former teacher: Reading of any kind counts! We are allowed to enjoy what we read or try something else out if we like. That’s the beauty of it 😊 good for you for reducing your screen and shopping time, I wish you well on it 💗
Oh Hannah, I love how I am almost 20 years younger than you and yet, here we are having almost exactly the same problem. For me, it is social media that I use as a GIANT distraction throughout the day. I especially resonated how you said you felt like reading immediately replaced this habit because you are avoiding processing something that would come up otherwise. I, too, want to make space to temporarily feel bad about something. I want to make space to face this discomfort so that hopefully, I can resolve it finally. You have inspired me to keep trying and to embrace this thing in my subconcious that is wrecking my life! You remind me so much of my big sister, by the way. She is 42 this year and you two have so much in common! ❤
Hannah, thank you for sharing your experience and struggles!
recently I've found that binge-consuming content became a problem for me and I use it to avoid facing pretty much everything. diving into other people's lives or fictional stories makes me "busy" to live my own life. it is a very sad reality, even writing this down hurts rn((
but)) you're giving me a motivation to do what I want to do - develop some rules around the topic, make an effort to stick to those and give myself a lot of compassion in the process because I kinda realize where the problem comes from and it's not pretty.
listening you talk about it really helps me and I'm grateful for your kind approach 💜
I just want to say how much I appreciate you being so vulnerable and honest about your shopping behaviors, Hannah. I think that’s probably way harder than you make it look. Not only is it very interesting to hear about your experiences, this video also made me realize some things about my own behavior. So thank you, Hannah!
thank you, Silke! Sending a hug to you!
I love these "heart to hearts". They make you think. Thank you!
I've followed your channel for a while now but this and the previous video on shopping are some of my favorites you've put out so far!
Fascinating video! I love how you analyzed the true reason why you were browsing/researching/shopping and what purpose it served. Made me reevaluate what habits I do that are in the same category (probably watching youtube :P)
Ur no buy series really helped me a few years ago. Thank u for this content again I love ur introspection and thoughts on why u and many of us shop