FIBRO SECTION | TOXIC POSITIVITY!
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ก.ย. 2024
- I haven't filmed a Fibro section for a while so thought I would look into positivity, as I am a very positive person, but learnt about toxic positivity which was really interesting! Hope it helps. See you next time.
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Excellent information. Can relate fully! So hard to not let the dismissals of my condition affect me- and these are from people that I think should know me well enough. Problem is that, as Fibro sufferers are aware, we don't look or act unwell! I have become a good actress but it is nevertheless bad when I'm alone which unfortunately is most of the time since my lovely husband's death almost 3 years ago(so add grief into my equation) I tend to feel like the next time such an occasion arises I should call the person(s) out for what they are - shallow & unfeeling & they should believe in me as a person with what can only described as a disability! I too have osteoarthritis as well so pain is NEVER not part of my life. I feel better having listened to you as even though I'm 81, I think very young, am funny & positive & always a ready to help anyone with problems.
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This resonates with me so much with my depression & anxiety. I have a lot of toxic positivity around me & it’s hurts. Take care xx
Yes it does my depression and anxiety are awful and when people say anything it definitely my fibro bad . Hope your day is ok take care 💜
Toxic positivity is not good. Have you had therapy for your depression and anxiety? Xx
Missed your fibro vlogs. I have adjusted my life around my illnesses but sometimes life doesn't work like that as I have a family etc so I can't always put myself first. I want to advocate for people like us who look fine but live with chronic pain daily and crashing fatigue. I let my hurt go when it comes to friends, I don't have time or energy for being hurt anymore and I'm alot happier within myself. You've been a great help to me as I came across your channel when I felt lonely and lost then I saw you managing your illnesses whilst also trying to have a life and I totally connected with you. I hope your Mum is on the mend. Take care all of you. X
Thanks Nicola, that was really interesting. I think part of the problem is that you don't look unwell with fibromyalgia. Recently I met someone I hadn't seen for a while and she said that I looked really well and I must be getting better and I answered 'Yeah, I'm fine' while thinking 'apart from my hips. knees. elbows and wrists killing me and I'm so tired I think I could sleep standing up'. I always feel I don't want to burden people with how bad I feel. I feel they must be bored stiff with it all, I know I am.
Exactly! I met someone the other day who I hadn't seen for a few years but knew I was ill. She said, "you look well!" I know just smile and say thank you. I replied good and bad days, but really, they are all pretty much full of pain and fatigue! I don't like telling it how it is as, like you say, I don't want people to get fed up with me! X
It's was a lovely blog very interesting information. yes l do the same but l tried to turn positive into a negative but its can be hard sometimes.
Woah, this resonated with me so much! I have ME which is similar in many ways to fibromyalgia and I can't tell you how glad I am to have come across your video today x I have a massive family and good friends but it is so hard to not try to 'be fine' and suppress my struggles in front of them because it is an invisible illness, one that has turned my whole life upside down and pushed me mentally and physically to the edge. Watching you talk so openly and honestly in your lovely way, has made me feel not so alone in my journey to accept the changes and challenges - and I just wanted to thank you for this today x Sending lots of love and strength to you and everyone who has their own health battles xxxx
Ah, thank you! 😘 I have ME too so can relate. I understand everything you are saying. Take care. ❤️
Thankyou Nicola for taking the time to talk about this x one of the worst toxic positivity lines “snap out of it ! there are people worse off than you x “ look on the bright side x these help no one except the person saying them and actually minimise and invalidate the listeners feelings x
Have you seen my video on annoying phrases? It contains lots of those! It is so frustrating. People think they are helping but they really aren't! X
@@LordandLordettes no I haven’t x I’ll have to take a look x
Thank you so so so very much for this post. I too appreciate the approach of balance- to be real and hopeful both. There is room for both! I need both to manage. I relate to everything you said with my own fibro. Godspeed in your awesome messages and education for the world. ❤️
Thank you Maria. 😘
I've had fibromyalgia for nearly 10 years, and been managing my symptoms well for the last year (through self care and pacing), but i've found i feel guilty for the good days. I feel people look at me like 'I thought you said you were sick' Then during flare ups i feel like i'm not believed because I've managed to go a few months in remission 'what a faker!' Even after all this time i still struggle with the guilt/shame of not being believed.
I lovely you channel 😊
Thank you! 😘
Good morning nicole lovely to have a fibro section have missed them always very informative . 💜 see you Saturday for the weekly Take care xx
Thank you Sharan. See you Saturday xx
Love your vlogs, omg I get this all the time, especially at work! When folks ask if I’m ok I nod saying yeah I’m ok, but inside I’m screaming and want to shout stop asking!!,,,, no I’m bloody not , I have loved listening to this you should look into podcasts Nic xx
Glad you enjoyed it. I would love to do a podcast but would want to do one with someone! Xx
Nicole I know this is off topic but my service dog Carebear passed away in my arms yesterday evening. And it's made my fibro and dystonia all flare up as well.
Oh I'm so sorry. 😔 I know what it's like to lose your beloved dog and it hurts like hell. It will get easier I promise. Look after yourself. ❤️
@Lord and Lordettes I know you would understand and I'll try my best to take care of yourself through this.
I say 'I'm fine' a lot. When I haven't and have told people what I'm j really feel, the person I'm telling doesn't really want hear. I had I last week, an 'friend' message me to ask how I was so I messaged back that I wasn't doing too well and struggling with depression ever since being diagnosed with FND on top of Fibromyalgia. She blanked me.
That's so sad. 😔 She wasn't a true friend then. I know we don't like to go on about how we feel but when we do actually say it, to get that isn't nice.
Hi Nicola , I’ve had fibromyalgia since my late teens and didn’t know what it was I got called a hypochondriac and even in my early 20 when I got diagnosed I was just told it’s fibromyalgia and left to it I’m 51 now and my oldest daughter has just been diagnosed to she is 31 so we can relate on our symptoms together although it’s good we have each other I wish she never had it x
No I can understand you wouldn't want your daughter to have it as we know how awful it is but like you say, nice to have someone to talk to. X
Hi how did you get diagnosed? As I have asked doctors about it. But I am sure they don’t believe in it. I have had pains for 20 years and felt very tired all the time. I have a can’t help Because I think they it’s my mental health. Is there a blood test or anything that they can do to see if that is what I have got. Thank you for videos. X
I got diagnosed from my pain clinic consultant but initially was referred to a rheumatologist who was as much use as a chocolate tea pot! No blood test can determine Fibro. It is done by illiminating your symptoms. Hope that helps! X