@@happyfee9730 Tried concrete evidence ;it was denied and deflected. You could show the more malignant ones a video of what they have done and they still try to deny and deflect. They'd say it was edited to make them look bad. Goes along with their paranoia.
“You can't force someone to respect you, but you can refuse to be disrespected.” “You will never really see how toxic someone is until you breathe fresher air.” “Stay away from people who can't take responsibility for their actions and who make you feel bad for being angry at them when they do you wrong.”✨☘️🙏
They are self destructive individuals as they fear abandonment but spend their lives doing everything that will result in them being abandoned………..it’s sooooooooo stupid!!!!
The way I relate to this comment. U can always tell when the narcissist is playing games. Your body always tells you. He had so many red flags too and I ignored them all. Smh
My ex discarded me and came back because her dad died and she needed me. She said if i were ever in a similar situation she'd be there for me. Then she discarded me again. When i realized she couldn't help but hurt me i blocked her. When i found out what narcissism is i blocked her friends & family. She mirrored one last time by doing the same and blocking my friends and family. So much for being there for me. Proved once and for all she gives zero shits about me because if something did happen to me it wouldnt be possible to get in touch with her. Thankful she showed her true colors
My BPD+NPD ex did literally the exact same thing to me a few months ago when her father died, after discarding me for an admittedly psychopathic narc ex of hers from a decade earlier who literally drove her to do something to herself that she's lucky to still be above ground. She figured that I would be forced to support her and ignore the fact that there were still so many answers I needed before I would be able to be there for her. She didn't like when I pointed out that if she valued my support and hadn't just dropped me like nothing, or at least didn't wait until literally the day he died to come back looking for the person she had before, then maybe (like a dummy) I would be able to help. She didn't think she would need me after she got back with her ex, until he discarded her two weeks earlier, and had the nerve to cry to me about having the same thing done to her that she did to me a couple months earlier. Ain't karma just a b*tch... The rest of the story matches yours verbatim.
You liberated yourself from being treated like a doormat, is that how you see it? In regards to blocking the person … Just wondering. Why would you expect someone to stay if you tell them to leave you alone?
The life of a narcissist has to be rough to behave and live life in such a way. 🤦🏾♂️ Why want revenge? Their life speaks for it's self! What a shame to be a narcissist.
Whatever they are hiding when you find out the truth of it all you will realize how sad and boring their inner life truly is. The mystery is used to entice as well. It is never worth the angst and upset you endure to figure them out
I hear you when you say it’s dysfunctional, perverse and self-sabotaging for the narcissist. Living lies and delusion must be so shameful. When they ghost you, you intelligently decide it’s over and detach, which puts you in total control of your emotions. They only feel they have power when they ghost. It is a glaring red flag to close the door and shut off emotional entryways. Some of us actually are healthy enough to know that if someone is absent, the relationship is nonexistent. The mind game is on them 100%. They are living in a delusion, including when they think you are. The joke ends up on the joker. The authentic will continue to be honest and authentic.
They definitely hide everything emotions,money their affairs and the fact they speak about you behind your back hiding that aswel,they still always get away with it,great video anoushka top lady🌹
Honest question here: what do you mean they always get away with it? I think my partner has traits of narcissism but I feel like I catch him in most of his lies.
@@tiphanie8isgreat they always get away with it because if you're in a narcissistic relationship it doesn't matter if you catch them out no one believes you when you tell them what they've been saying and doing, they manipulate everyone and turn the tables on you, that's how it was for me,nasty horrible vindictive people
@@James-bc2oh, ahh! So true. Thank you. You are right about that! A lot of his friends think I am crazy aka a psycho! But on a positive note, one of his best female friends was my sister. She believes me now and no longer talks to him. I know it drives him crazy! Also, some of his “supplies” now see him. I have been able to out him to several of his female friends. And they no longer talk to him. Possibly one of his long time make friends as well. This makes him extra mean to me. He has an addiction, possibly 3 & I believe it makes him act like a narcissistic. I feel like he does have feelings, but he doesn’t know how to mange them. So he manipulates people in his life to get his needs met. It’s sad really.
This really described the ex-narcissist in my life back in 2015/6. I never really knew what was going on, and the past of that ex was also a very shadowy zone in all the senses of the word, both sleazy and yet mysteriously shrouded in secrecy.
A Narcissist hides things because if we knew the truth then we'd be able to hold them accountable, and rhey can't have that. My Ex had a way of climbing the truth to throw me off track by admitting 'half truths'. 🍒
Lies, Shame, avoiding accountability, list goes on. The crazy thing is how they can display such vulgar behavior like as to what she did to me in front of her employer and friends, but still somehow fool them into staying employed and as friends. If I saw someone do someone wrong like that I sure as hell wouldn’t want them running my business money to the bank. Crazy!
The gaslighting narcissist I'm working with hides my personal items or things I need in order to do my job. Then she replaces some of the items in the same place or an alternate location, and sets it up for me and those around me, to look like I just forgot! This keeps happening, and now my family think I just don't remember because I'm 70 and forgetting things. But I just forget words, not actions. I don't understand what's happening or has happened. I'm being set up to look like I'm crazy or losing my mind because of my age! I KNOW when I'm forgetting something! I KNOW when I put something in a certain place! And I KNOW when I've been gaslighted, though I didn't know in the beginning. I trust people, so I was confused at first by what and WHY these things kept happening. They happen daily! This makes the work environment very difficult. I can't just leave because I care for my paraplegic daughter. She turned my whole family against me, since this woman is so quiet, and helpful. She's made herself indispensable to my daughter by love bombing her constantly, bringing her gifts daily, etc. I'm in an extremely vulnerable place right now and none of my family believe me or back me up. I'm completely on my own, and my entire family is siding with this abuser! They just can't believe such a sweet, helpful woman is capable of doing what I told them. I need this to change for my daughter's sake! She is being heavily manipulated!
@@sonlya2010 I'm learning fast right now through various videos. I may or may not seek a therapist.. Thank you for the suggestion. I truly appreciate it..
Had the impulse to clap my hands twice after, "HIDING, HIDING & HIDING." Very very good. I agree. Although it hurts (by being ghosted, me running her off rather) my gut knows it's for the best. Helps to hear this info. I cannot even let myself feel the pain shes trying to smother. Excellent description of what's in the mind/heart of narcissists. (I bargain with a ghost, I offer my soul, for anything but farewell.)
We were born with both ears one for ANGEL & the other for the Devil, the strog person listen to the Angel because he has the REAL POWER, the weak person listens to the DEVIL to gain the REAL POWER from the ANGEL/EMPATH , the tricky part is the NARCISIST came to your life to show you YOUR REAL POWER , thank you Anoushka for another great video 😊🙏
The silence is the core of a narcissistic toxic relationship. If you would cope with knowing what they do and then stay away from them they would see that they lost control. They want to keep you in the state of thinking about what they do so can not cope whatever it is what they do and so they don't help You to move on and put your energy elsewhere. IT's the narcissists main supply when You think about what they do and think. They have a pitiful self-esteem so they hide to make themselves more important.
It’s all so ridiculous. My ex narcissist after 2 years still tries to reach out with google phone numbers texting and pretending to be someone else to get info. Sometimes I play along and sometimes I don’t. I try to make sure I keep my power. It’s really a messed up game. He is a covert narcissist totally!! It’s quite sad. The only thing that has helped me be strong is now knowing it doesn’t matter who he’s with. It won’t work. And yes, coward is the key word in this video!! Thank you!!
I appreciate the underlying understanding and compassion in your words. There is no point in hating narcissists, they have a severe mental disease, they are prisoners in their life. We as a society should however develop better mechanisms and a different value system that prevents all these narcissists and psychopaths to get into powerful positions in corporations, politics etc.
Hiding was so significant in my 28 year marriage. Even after I escaped, just 8 weeks ago, I have been told by others that he is still claiming we are together but had to move house etc. He is even telling his own family we are still together and going travelling. Yet he’s already moved in with a woman and her son and claiming to neighbours that’s his wife and son. It’s whole other level insane...
It did the same to me I saw one his friends and he said he saw me two days ago I haven't been with him since June WHAT...... These monsters crazy with a K 🤣😭
@@ninath13 I just want this person out of my head and my heart so he can’t hurt me anymore. I gave away a life over him. Seeing him with a new supply that he’s claiming is his wife and son and watching the love bombing and him doing all the things I begged we could do together really sucks and hurts. It’s the pain of knowing you begged for crumbs of love but didn’t get them and then the narc flaunts the ‘illusion’ in front of you to hurt you even more. I understand it more and more thanks to this channel but it’s still like a knife to the heart. I’m working hard on self and healing right now.
@@tanyawatts3896 The more you understand the disorder the lesser the pain.The less you know about them after the discard the better.She will fall off the pedestal rather quickly no worries about that and then she will be suffering.They love to gloat to exs it gives them a supply high.
My gosh! Sounds like you live in my relationship! They block on social media, have endless secrets with their family of origin, other people and so forth. they shop in secrecy - so mind boggling! What a tragic way of living. The truth is beautiful for average reasonably healthy people as it allows all forms of growth including spiritual and emotional growth.
You've hit the nail on the head. I have spent most of my life surrounded by Narcsisses as I simly could not get to grips with how and why a/any person could/can lie so much thus creating mind control and I subsequently became confused living in fear as the extent of the manipulation I had suffered along side the violence was horrific - 'they' do not want you to be free, free in anything and god forbid that you speak out the truth of the matter to them, the consequences became worse. I cannot be in or around 'these' types of people and I listen to my soul now Thank you for the reminder. Thank you.
Hides and follows us til death!!!!! But mine sure did get personal in his issues with me , then turned everything around, told everyone I knew it was me, went no contact 8 months then called me and humiliated me one last time one month before he died. After he had a nonprofit business helping ptsd patients and families. So ironic but that's what it all was. His real image with me could not be exposed to community!!!! He also called my husband if 31 years and told me he was a weak person!!!! Ha!!!!
😂 thanks for these information. It gives us a step ahead of what those abusers think. Now my ex friend doesn’t know that i’m well aware that he got his 👀 on me while trying his best to hide like a chameleon🤣😂
Being vague and misleading give them power like it's a big secret, like kids do, this creates the "rush" for them when in fact it's not the information, it's your frustration that trips their trigger to dopamine blasts...it's not even close to healthy..I was typing this as you are explaining this and this detailed info is great explanation..it causes damage to any aquantice-ship
This drove me crazy, made me feel helpless, paralysed, not loved, not appreciated. This single move of hiding information is very devastating bcz no matter how much they try to hide, they really be spilling the beans consciously or unconsciously, and that breaks your heart almost everyday.
😮 Wish I had this information earlier. It started off as subtle “hiding” and withholding until it became extreme literally thought I was going mad.. after months and months of confusion I kinda did. You’re right it’s a form of gaslighting and emotional abuse. Leaving your partner ridden with anxiety and left in the dark is not normal. When I walked away closure was held hostage and I was made to look ridiculous for wanting a civil ending
I feel in control knowing I have the ability to see past the bs. I feel in control when armed with the knowledge and experience of these videos that I see the elephant or elephants in the room when I see them and I don't need to call them out. It's a heightened state of power - it's not a dominating power. It's the ability to even know what they are going to be saying to me if I'm in a disagreement with a member of my family, I can predict everything they're going to say to me when I say the certain things I'll say to them about my life choices and it gives me that heightened state of awareness to know what's going on, who the flying monkeys are - you don't need to always take the Narcissist head on but just knowing what they are is enough all the while knowing they'll feel that shift of energy inside of you because you're not showing any signs of emotion so they'll wonder what's going on with you but once you see the group of people for who they are why must you hang around with them? You just find distance between them is your ability to get your control back.
Good video. Only point I wish to raise...social media was mentioned. A hard no contact regime means they can't see what you're up to on social media. Totally get rid of them and you won't get trapped back into the relationship. It's hard initially but well worth the effort. Time heals all wounds. If it's a struggle, write a mantra and read it every time you feel weak.
😢That's so true, Ma'am! My Narc husband cheats on me, and the hiding tactic is used to make me believe he has no other woman, because he knows once I prove his infidelity, I will absolutely abandon him!
I feel like I never really knew this person… Last year, just two months ago I found out he has been in jail many times (and not for minor charges), then after one year and a half of no contact he unblocked me on insta and of course he saw my stories to make sure I knew he unblocked. Hasn’t said A WORD ever since… hope he doesn’t. I know he knows I am not coming back and he won’t risk his pride humiliating himself.
I’m no longer on social media my ex narc and narc mom stalked me via fake accounts so I deleted my social media 😂 I took back control when I ran and ran far away xx
Besides blocking the narcissist I know, I also had to restrict what I post to my friends only. I had the distinct impression that he had created a fake account to spy on me. Since then, I feel much better!
Can you make a video on when you really go full NC no social media , new address ..ect that’s what I’ve done a year and a half already 🎉 my full confidence is back I’m in control of my life an it keeps improving ❤❤❤❤ I get it now 😊 it’s amazing
Some narcs have so many connections in pd like mine that even after his death, his next of kin follows me no matter what I do . New phone, new car etc!!!!
I agree. They don’t won’t you to have free choice. Mine was a master of omission of truth. It’s a power play and puts you at a disadvantage. All secrets and withholding of information is manipulation. I ended my relationship over this. It became very clear to me he always would have the upper hand and had been lying or hiding many things. He wanted to control the relationship and control me.
But we end up leaving them when we know they are lying and hiding secrets. It’s counterintuitive for them. They don’t want to be abandon but they operate like this.
society at large needs better understanding and appreciation of the circumstances that cause this disorder to take shape in children's lives. Anoushka's messaging is a blessing but the discussion needs to begin to look at prevention. even if everyone understood how to recognize a narcissist that alone won't prevent their awful presence from recurring
She was hiding her social media from me , it was all long distance we met online and what i felt like it was chemistry it was more of love bombing. I always felt something off since she was hunting for my reaction about the mind games she played and since i am well established i reacted to it by giving her silent treatment that made her so mad it was so out of character.. She stalks my social media all the time since i gave my account info to her thinking she is just shy so i told her add me when you feel ready ended up being the worst mistake of my life. Like why stalk me ?? When you wanted to friendzone me.
@@flowersofthefield340 Yep or just second sim card she bought it probably because she waited a day before giving me a number 😂. It all makes sense now but when you are in it you are blind.
I went though a similar situation with a guy I met on social media. He happened to live in the same city, and our friendship unfolded on Twitter. We had so much in common, (so I thought), and everything was fine in the beginning. We went out several times to see live music, eat out, or go to baseball games (since he is a fan). One red flag that I look back on is that i went everywhere he wanted to go, but when I invited him places he wasn’t interested. And lord knows I hate baseball, but I went with him because that’s what I thought friends do. The discard phase started when I told him that I liked him more than a friend. During that time communication on his part was very sketchy. Sometimes I would call him, (as friends do) and he would cut conversations short. The last time I called him, out of the blue he told me not to stalk him. I knew then that our friendship was over. Stalking is something I definitely don’t do. In the end he publicly discarded me on Facebook in a way that only he & I could understand. He had to be one of the most toxic persons I’ve ever met. Our friendship ended the beginning of last year, and I’m still healing from it.
My future ex husband alienated me from my children, then told me over phone my adult son is dying., then ghosted me…I still don’t know. Lots of therapy and radical acceptance. Thank you for this particular topic!
You'd think if they're so haunted by their truths and are aware of their despicable behavior and therefore have to lie, deceive and gaslight to avoid facing the consequences, maybe they would realize if they stopped behaving so consciously and intentionally reprehensibly towards the people they are afraid will abandon them if they knew what they were doing behind their back, and even right to their face 🤷🏼♂️
This is absolutely great info! This is exactly what is happening presently! But I've gone no contact for a while now! So this behavior doesn't bother me anymore! Thank God!! I appreciate your thoughts my dear! Thanks!!
An excellent explanation, clear, step by step.. Anushka thanks for being here to help us free of the narc behaviour.. " they are not strong enough tell us the True.." 🌻
Fantastic subject and video!! I've learnt to make peace with not knowing their secrets. Giving myself the permission to live my best life as they will forever be looking over their shoulder neck deep in their secrets and lies. 😜
Before ghosting he texted but deleted the message before I could read. So after I never had a chance to know what it was. Sometimes our toughest challenges turn out to be our greatest blessings.
Well, I also use social media only anonymously. That is my decision. If everyone else feels it’s appropriate to put their life in public, it’s not my problem. And yes, I control what information about me goes public. Truly, it’s a smart thing to do that. And it’s got nothing to do with narcissism.
Social media is a magnet to narcissism. They thrive towards these different platforms. Well, I don't mean that everyone on there are narcs. But there's a high majority on who is. Because that's where they seek out there next victim.
Thank you so much for this information. I have been psychologically abused for so long. These persons follow me to my doctor's office, dental appointments, all my jobs, grocery stores, libraries anywhere I go, they are there to harasses me. I'm currently living in a hotel and persons on each side of me these persons, pretend that I know who is on the other side. 'They throw out words of insults, word games, to take my peace. I'm hoping with faith these persons will be exposed in the name of Jesus. And you are right, they say things like I don't need to know everything. I need to know everything pertaining to me, so I can make good sound rational decisions in this life. Someone is empowering them to do this to me. Someone is telling them not to tell me anything. Satanist, devil workers I'm sure they are. Help Lord Jesus.
Excellent. Thank you Anoushka for your straight forward, clear explanation regarding all of this. Very insightful. Your knowledge and wisdom has been a great help in the healing process. You are very appreciated Anoushka.
Plainly stated, you’re very helpful. Looking forward to the new found clarity your insight has fostered in my life. Thank you! Happy Blessed New Year!!!
I stopped caring the min I walked out the door. cause I've been thru it before with my ex narc for 9yrs. The resent ex narc I was with for a year and a half. Started seeing narc treats after a year of being together and knew it wasn't going to last and wasn't a relationship that I wanted to be in. After she gave me the silent treatment for a week that's when I said ok I'm done. Packed my belongings and walked out the door and never looked back. It's been almost 2 months. I'm good and don't care about the narc. Living my life and moving forward in a positive manner.
😅Ifwe were doing really well we wouldnt be watching your video..😅😅😅 The gosl is to be feeling better AFTER having watched your instructional video😊😊😊I was after watching the last one. Thank you😊😊
I told the narc I am starting to see who he really is. Haven't heard from him in 4 weeks. 😂😂😂 I mentally checkout of the relationship 6 months prior to detaching. I feel free because I know he is not wired the way normal people are.
I Don't care anymore. It's how you get your power back.
Gather evidence and call them out on there bs.
@@happyfee9730 Tried concrete evidence ;it was denied and deflected. You could show the more malignant ones a video of what they have done and they still try to deny and deflect. They'd say it was edited to make them look bad. Goes along with their paranoia.
❤
Me too but it's just interesting.
Right… I’m almost tired of watching these video. I need to rid my spirit, mind, and energy of learning about a narcissist
“You can't force someone to respect you, but you can refuse to be disrespected.” “You will never really see how toxic someone is until you breathe fresher air.” “Stay away from people who can't take responsibility for their actions and who make you feel bad for being angry at them when they do you wrong.”✨☘️🙏
Amen 🙏❤
@@tiphanie8isgreat God bless you ✨☘️🙏
@Rajput1cp 👍✨☘️🙏
@@evelina787 God bless you too 🙏💕
amen!
They are self destructive individuals as they fear abandonment but spend their lives doing everything that will result in them being abandoned………..it’s sooooooooo stupid!!!!
It’s horrible when people play games with our emotions it hurts
They need to be fired and locked up
They hide because they're cowards. I detected weakness in his behavior way before our friendship was over.
The way I relate to this comment. U can always tell when the narcissist is playing games. Your body always tells you. He had so many red flags too and I ignored them all. Smh
They are creepy weirdos.
Yeppp
@@sian8260 yep sian
My ex discarded me and came back because her dad died and she needed me. She said if i were ever in a similar situation she'd be there for me. Then she discarded me again. When i realized she couldn't help but hurt me i blocked her. When i found out what narcissism is i blocked her friends & family. She mirrored one last time by doing the same and blocking my friends and family. So much for being there for me. Proved once and for all she gives zero shits about me because if something did happen to me it wouldnt be possible to get in touch with her. Thankful she showed her true colors
My BPD+NPD ex did literally the exact same thing to me a few months ago when her father died, after discarding me for an admittedly psychopathic narc ex of hers from a decade earlier who literally drove her to do something to herself that she's lucky to still be above ground. She figured that I would be forced to support her and ignore the fact that there were still so many answers I needed before I would be able to be there for her. She didn't like when I pointed out that if she valued my support and hadn't just dropped me like nothing, or at least didn't wait until literally the day he died to come back looking for the person she had before, then maybe (like a dummy) I would be able to help. She didn't think she would need me after she got back with her ex, until he discarded her two weeks earlier, and had the nerve to cry to me about having the same thing done to her that she did to me a couple months earlier. Ain't karma just a b*tch... The rest of the story matches yours verbatim.
You liberated yourself from being treated like a doormat, is that how you see it?
In regards to blocking the person … Just wondering. Why would you expect someone to stay if you tell them to leave you alone?
@@flexflow4602 : ???
The life of a narcissist has to be rough to behave and live life in such a way. 🤦🏾♂️ Why want revenge? Their life speaks for it's self! What a shame to be a narcissist.
Absolutely!
Very true u got to no contact all
Whatever they are hiding when you find out the truth of it all you will realize how sad and boring their inner life truly is. The mystery is used to entice as well. It is never worth the angst and upset you endure to figure them out
I agree, they are much more ordinary as they (want to) appear.
Facts all smoke n mirrors with em
They don’t know how to have an inner life.
I hear you when you say it’s dysfunctional, perverse and self-sabotaging for the narcissist. Living lies and delusion must be so shameful.
When they ghost you, you intelligently decide it’s over and detach, which puts you in total control of your emotions.
They only feel they have power when they ghost. It is a glaring red flag to close the door and shut off emotional entryways. Some of us actually are healthy enough to know that if someone is absent, the relationship is nonexistent. The mind game is on them 100%. They are living in a delusion, including when they think you are.
The joke ends up on the joker.
The authentic will continue to be honest and authentic.
They definitely hide everything emotions,money their affairs and the fact they speak about you behind your back hiding that aswel,they still always get away with it,great video anoushka top lady🌹
Honest question here: what do you mean they always get away with it?
I think my partner has traits of narcissism but I feel like I catch him in most of his lies.
@@tiphanie8isgreat they always get away with it because if you're in a narcissistic relationship it doesn't matter if you catch them out no one believes you when you tell them what they've been saying and doing, they manipulate everyone and turn the tables on you, that's how it was for me,nasty horrible vindictive people
@@James-bc2oh, ahh! So true. Thank you. You are right about that! A lot of his friends think I am crazy aka a psycho! But on a positive note, one of his best female friends was my sister. She believes me now and no longer talks to him. I know it drives him crazy! Also, some of his “supplies” now see him. I have been able to out him to several of his female friends. And they no longer talk to him. Possibly one of his long time make friends as well. This makes him extra mean to me. He has an addiction, possibly 3 & I believe it makes him act like a narcissistic. I feel like he does have feelings, but he doesn’t know how to mange them. So he manipulates people in his life to get his needs met. It’s sad really.
Great video Anoushka. They also hide the other people they are constantly cheating on you with(if it's not a family member or friend).
they hide them in plain site right in front of you. Just an old friend from elementary.
@311 facts.... oh this is my best friend, or this is my godbrother.... yep I have heard most of, if not all of them.
Ex recorded me without my knowledge- helped him keep his stories straight
Blew us up with phony photos
Narcissists are like sharks in that they constantly need feeding, their exhausting. Excellent video 👍
With the narcissist, there's no "there" there. No emotional continuity.
This really described the ex-narcissist in my life back in 2015/6. I never really knew what was going on, and the past of that ex was also a very shadowy zone in all the senses of the word, both sleazy and yet mysteriously shrouded in secrecy.
💯!!
I couldn’t have worded it better !! 👏🏼
Exactly!
A Narcissist hides things because if we knew the truth then we'd be able to hold them accountable, and rhey can't have that. My Ex had a way of climbing the truth to throw me off track by admitting 'half truths'. 🍒
Perfectly explained!!! A narc got so many layers to them it's unbelievable
… an adventure to explore, right? But only the first time until you got it …
So true.
She is right they hide because all the bad think they to the Pepole.
They are horrendous cowards. Truth is there is no-one there get answers from just a howling void. It's a zero sum game.
Great video.. everything is true here ..and always blame everyone around for their miserable life
Yes! They are very superficial, to the point of insult and disrespect. And it stays that way their whole life with you, it doesn’t change or go away.
Lies, Shame, avoiding accountability, list goes on.
The crazy thing is how they can display such vulgar behavior like as to what she did to me in front of her employer and friends, but still somehow fool them into staying employed and as friends.
If I saw someone do someone wrong like that I sure as hell wouldn’t want them running my business money to the bank. Crazy!
The gaslighting narcissist I'm working with hides my personal items or things I need in order to do my job. Then she replaces some of the items in the same place or an alternate location, and sets it up for me and those around me, to look like I just forgot! This keeps happening, and now my family think I just don't remember because I'm 70 and forgetting things. But I just forget words, not actions. I don't understand what's happening or has happened. I'm being set up to look like I'm crazy or losing my mind because of my age! I KNOW when I'm forgetting something! I KNOW when I put something in a certain place! And I KNOW when I've been gaslighted, though I didn't know in the beginning. I trust people, so I was confused at first by what and WHY these things kept happening. They happen daily! This makes the work environment very difficult. I can't just leave because I care for my paraplegic daughter.
She turned my whole family against me, since this woman is so quiet, and helpful.
She's made herself indispensable to my daughter by love bombing her constantly, bringing her gifts daily, etc.
I'm in an extremely vulnerable place right now and none of my family believe me or back me up. I'm completely on my own, and my entire family is siding with this abuser! They just can't believe such a sweet, helpful woman is capable of doing what I told them. I need this to change for my daughter's sake! She is being heavily manipulated!
I believe you
Praying 🙏
Try to find a good counselor so maybe they can help?
@@sonlya2010
Thank you! I've stopped even trying to explain. She even removed and changed my Christmas decorations and table settings!
God help me..
@@sonlya2010
I'm learning fast right now through various videos. I may or may not seek a therapist..
Thank you for the suggestion. I truly appreciate it..
Had the impulse to clap my hands twice after, "HIDING, HIDING & HIDING." Very very good. I agree. Although it hurts (by being ghosted, me running her off rather) my gut knows it's for the best. Helps to hear this info. I cannot even let myself feel the pain shes trying to smother. Excellent description of what's in the mind/heart of narcissists.
(I bargain with a ghost,
I offer my soul, for anything but farewell.)
We were born with both ears one for ANGEL & the other for the Devil, the strog person listen to the Angel because he has the REAL POWER, the weak person listens to the DEVIL to gain the REAL POWER from the ANGEL/EMPATH , the tricky part is the NARCISIST came to your life to show you YOUR REAL POWER , thank you Anoushka for another great video 😊🙏
The silence is the core of a narcissistic toxic relationship.
If you would cope with knowing what they do and then stay away from them they would see that they lost control.
They want to keep you in the state of thinking about what they do so can not cope whatever it is what they do and so they don't help You to move on and put your energy elsewhere. IT's the narcissists main supply when You think about what they do and think.
They have a pitiful self-esteem so they hide to make themselves more important.
It’s all so ridiculous. My ex narcissist after 2 years still tries to reach out with google phone numbers texting and pretending to be someone else to get info. Sometimes I play along and sometimes I don’t. I try to make sure I keep my power. It’s really a messed up game. He is a covert narcissist totally!! It’s quite sad. The only thing that has helped me be strong is now knowing it doesn’t matter who he’s with. It won’t work. And yes, coward is the key word in this video!! Thank you!!
I appreciate the underlying understanding and compassion in your words. There is no point in hating narcissists, they have a severe mental disease, they are prisoners in their life.
We as a society should however develop better mechanisms and a different value system that prevents all these narcissists and psychopaths to get into powerful positions in corporations, politics etc.
Whether yes or no, their hiding doesn't matter. After all, no one need such people to be happy, confident or to move on in life.
Hiding was so significant in my 28 year marriage. Even after I escaped, just 8 weeks ago, I have been told by others that he is still claiming we are together but had to move house etc. He is even telling his own family we are still together and going travelling. Yet he’s already moved in with a woman and her son and claiming to neighbours that’s his wife and son. It’s whole other level insane...
It did the same to me I saw one his friends and he said he saw me two days ago I haven't been with him since June WHAT...... These monsters crazy with a K 🤣😭
@@ninath13 I just want this person out of my head and my heart so he can’t hurt me anymore. I gave away a life over him. Seeing him with a new supply that he’s claiming is his wife and son and watching the love bombing and him doing all the things I begged we could do together really sucks and hurts. It’s the pain of knowing you begged for crumbs of love but didn’t get them and then the narc flaunts the ‘illusion’ in front of you to hurt you even more. I understand it more and more thanks to this channel but it’s still like a knife to the heart. I’m working hard on self and healing right now.
@@tanyawatts3896 The more you understand the disorder the lesser the pain.The less you know about them after the discard the better.She will fall off the pedestal rather quickly no worries about that and then she will be suffering.They love to gloat to exs it gives them a supply high.
@@nessauk2786 thank you. 🦋🙏. Is it wrong to want to see them fall off their perch?? 😃
I dealt with a women who had me googling stuff. By the end of it, she seemed like the craziest person on earth lol. I completely believe you.
My gosh! Sounds like you live in my relationship! They block on social media, have endless secrets with their family of origin, other people and so forth. they shop in secrecy - so mind boggling! What a tragic way of living. The truth is beautiful for average reasonably healthy people as it allows all forms of growth including spiritual and emotional growth.
You've hit the nail on the head.
I have spent most of my life surrounded by Narcsisses as I simly could not get to grips with how and why a/any person could/can lie so much thus creating mind control and I subsequently became confused living in fear as the extent of the manipulation I had suffered along side the violence was horrific - 'they' do not want you to be free, free in anything and god forbid that you speak out the truth of the matter to them, the consequences became worse.
I cannot be in or around 'these' types of people and I listen to my soul now
Thank you for the reminder.
Thank you.
They're a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma. Good luck.
Yup, they’re simply selfish. 🧐
The "Turducken" of personality disorders.
Wow the world has some seriously weird devils dam
This woman is a genius
Hides and follows us til death!!!!! But mine sure did get personal in his issues with me , then turned everything around, told everyone I knew it was me, went no contact 8 months then called me and humiliated me one last time one month before he died. After he had a nonprofit business helping ptsd patients and families. So ironic but that's what it all was. His real image with me could not be exposed to community!!!! He also called my husband if 31 years and told me he was a weak person!!!! Ha!!!!
😂 thanks for these information. It gives us a step ahead of what those abusers think. Now my ex friend doesn’t know that i’m well aware that he got his 👀 on me while trying his best to hide like a chameleon🤣😂
Being vague and misleading give them power like it's a big secret, like kids do, this creates the "rush" for them when in fact it's not the information, it's your frustration that trips their trigger to dopamine blasts...it's not even close to healthy..I was typing this as you are explaining this and this detailed info is great explanation..it causes damage to any aquantice-ship
This drove me crazy, made me feel helpless, paralysed, not loved, not appreciated. This single move of hiding information is very devastating bcz no matter how much they try to hide, they really be spilling the beans consciously or unconsciously, and that breaks your heart almost everyday.
😮 Wish I had this information earlier. It started off as subtle “hiding” and withholding until it became extreme literally thought I was going mad.. after months and months of confusion I kinda did. You’re right it’s a form of gaslighting and emotional abuse. Leaving your partner ridden with anxiety and left in the dark is not normal. When I walked away closure was held hostage and I was made to look ridiculous for wanting a civil ending
I feel in control knowing I have the ability to see past the bs. I feel in control when armed with the knowledge and experience of these videos that I see the elephant or elephants in the room when I see them and I don't need to call them out. It's a heightened state of power - it's not a dominating power. It's the ability to even know what they are going to be saying to me if I'm in a disagreement with a member of my family, I can predict everything they're going to say to me when I say the certain things I'll say to them about my life choices and it gives me that heightened state of awareness to know what's going on, who the flying monkeys are - you don't need to always take the Narcissist head on but just knowing what they are is enough all the while knowing they'll feel that shift of energy inside of you because you're not showing any signs of emotion so they'll wonder what's going on with you but once you see the group of people for who they are why must you hang around with them? You just find distance between them is your ability to get your control back.
Good video.
Only point I wish to raise...social media was mentioned.
A hard no contact regime means they can't see what you're up to on social media.
Totally get rid of them and you won't get trapped back into the relationship.
It's hard initially but well worth the effort.
Time heals all wounds.
If it's a struggle, write a mantra and read it every time you feel weak.
i wish he did hide from me and never returned!!!!!
😅👏Yes!
😢That's so true, Ma'am! My Narc husband cheats on me, and the hiding tactic is used to make me believe he has no other woman, because he knows once I prove his infidelity, I will absolutely abandon him!
I feel like I never really knew this person… Last year, just two months ago I found out he has been in jail many times (and not for minor charges), then after one year and a half of no contact he unblocked me on insta and of course he saw my stories to make sure I knew he unblocked. Hasn’t said A WORD ever since… hope he doesn’t. I know he knows I am not coming back and he won’t risk his pride humiliating himself.
I’m no longer on social media my ex narc and narc mom stalked me via fake accounts so I deleted my social media 😂 I took back control when I ran and ran far away xx
Congrats. Most people will not bring themselves to do that. I did the same eight years ago. Never been happier.
Almost missed this video…usually have your picture…another brilliant observation…thank you…
Excellent. I've been through hell and back and learned SO MUCH! THIS IS EXACTLY RIGHT!!
Besides blocking the narcissist I know, I also had to restrict what I post to my friends only. I had the distinct impression that he had created a fake account to spy on me. Since then, I feel much better!
Can you make a video on when you really go full NC no social media , new address ..ect that’s what I’ve done a year and a half already 🎉 my full confidence is back I’m in control of my life an it keeps improving ❤❤❤❤ I get it now 😊 it’s amazing
I can’t wait to be in that place 🙏
Some narcs have so many connections in pd like mine that even after his death, his next of kin follows me no matter what I do . New phone, new car etc!!!!
Simply put.
The Narcissist is just a plain COWARD
managers are scared of these bums never work, fire them. Very poor management.
I agree. They don’t won’t you to have free choice. Mine was a master of omission of truth. It’s a power play and puts you at a disadvantage. All secrets and withholding of information is manipulation. I ended my relationship over this. It became very clear to me he always would have the upper hand and had been lying or hiding many things. He wanted to control the relationship and control me.
ABSOLUTE 💯 Truth and Facts !!!!
Wow this one's gonna be amazing for me. Mine hides it's insane
But we end up leaving them when we know they are lying and hiding secrets. It’s counterintuitive for them. They don’t want to be abandon but they operate like this.
Thank you sister. This video was so helpful for me and my current situation.
This is such a huge truth!! Bless you and thank you for sharing your insight to help the rest of us!!!
Thanks for untying the knots in my brain that’s what it feels like You have no idea how much you help me.
society at large needs better understanding and appreciation of the circumstances that cause this disorder to take shape in children's lives. Anoushka's messaging is a blessing but the discussion needs to begin to look at prevention. even if everyone understood how to recognize a narcissist that alone won't prevent their awful presence from recurring
She was hiding her social media from me , it was all long distance we met online and what i felt like it was chemistry it was more of love bombing. I always felt something off since she was hunting for my reaction about the mind games she played and since i am well established i reacted to it by giving her silent treatment that made her so mad it was so out of character.. She stalks my social media all the time since i gave my account info to her thinking she is just shy so i told her add me when you feel ready ended up being the worst mistake of my life. Like why stalk me ?? When you wanted to friendzone me.
2nd phones .... !!!
@@flowersofthefield340 Yep or just second sim card she bought it probably because she waited a day before giving me a number 😂. It all makes sense now but when you are in it you are blind.
I went though a similar situation with a guy I met on social media. He happened to live in the same city, and our friendship unfolded on Twitter. We had so much in common, (so I thought), and everything was fine in the beginning. We went out several times to see live music, eat out, or go to baseball games (since he is a fan). One red flag that I look back on is that i went everywhere he wanted to go, but when I invited him places he wasn’t interested. And lord knows I hate baseball, but I went with him because that’s what I thought friends do. The discard phase started when I told him that I liked him more than a friend. During that time communication on his part was very sketchy. Sometimes I would call him, (as friends do) and he would cut conversations short. The last time I called him, out of the blue he told me not to stalk him. I knew then that our friendship was over. Stalking is something I definitely don’t do. In the end he publicly discarded me on Facebook in a way that only he & I could understand. He had to be one of the most toxic persons I’ve ever met. Our friendship ended the beginning of last year, and I’m still healing from it.
This video did help ...I just wish Id seen it literally years and years and years and years ago
I appreciate ur videos
God 🙏 bless you for saving lives of many people
My future ex husband alienated me from my children, then told me over phone my adult son is dying., then ghosted me…I still don’t know. Lots of therapy and radical acceptance. Thank you for this particular topic!
You'd think if they're so haunted by their truths and are aware of their despicable behavior and therefore have to lie, deceive and gaslight to avoid facing the consequences, maybe they would realize if they stopped behaving so consciously and intentionally reprehensibly towards the people they are afraid will abandon them if they knew what they were doing behind their back, and even right to their face 🤷🏼♂️
Exactly! It’s counterintuitive.
This is absolutely great info! This is exactly what is happening presently! But I've gone no contact for a while now! So this behavior doesn't bother me anymore! Thank God!! I appreciate your thoughts my dear! Thanks!!
An excellent explanation, clear, step by step.. Anushka thanks for being here to help us free of the narc behaviour.. " they are not strong enough tell us the True.." 🌻
That’s exactly my spouse . He is actually who u described and I went insane at one point . He puts me down a lot
Fantastic subject and video!! I've learnt to make peace with not knowing their secrets. Giving myself the permission to live my best life as they will forever be looking over their shoulder neck deep in their secrets and lies. 😜
Before ghosting he texted but deleted the message before I could read. So after I never had a chance to know what it was. Sometimes our toughest challenges turn out to be our greatest blessings.
WELL EXPLAINED.
He does that constantly, everything you said,and I am detaching
Boy u know I needed this video numbers ringing my phone have no clue as to who they are 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂ty😊
I am so into Church and Jesus. Ladies bible study.
I feel alive. I felt like I was With the devil before.
Well, I also use social media only anonymously. That is my decision. If everyone else feels it’s appropriate to put their life in public, it’s not my problem. And yes, I control what information about me goes public. Truly, it’s a smart thing to do that. And it’s got nothing to do with narcissism.
Social media is a magnet to narcissism. They thrive towards these different platforms. Well, I don't mean that everyone on there are narcs. But there's a high majority on who is. Because that's where they seek out there next victim.
Thank you so much for this information. I have been psychologically abused for so long. These persons follow me to my doctor's office, dental appointments, all my jobs, grocery stores, libraries anywhere I go, they are there to harasses me. I'm currently living in a hotel and persons on each side of me these persons, pretend that I know who is on the other side. 'They throw out words of insults, word games, to take my peace. I'm hoping with faith these persons will be exposed in the name of Jesus. And you are right, they say things like I don't need to know everything. I need to know everything pertaining to me, so I can make good sound rational decisions in this life. Someone is empowering them to do this to me. Someone is telling them not to tell me anything. Satanist, devil workers I'm sure they are. Help Lord Jesus.
So spot on. First time I have ever heard my situation explained so clearly. Nice.
Excellent. Thank you Anoushka for your straight forward, clear explanation regarding all of this. Very insightful. Your knowledge and wisdom has been a great help in the healing process. You are very appreciated Anoushka.
Absolutely brilliant absolutely gorgeous
The best antidote is be yourself the rest is fictional
Thanks for this education which gives me a clearer understanding to an experience not so long ago. ❤
You nailed it as usual 👏
This was absolutely tremendous, Gold, Thank you so much for this, Peace, love, Respect to you and everyone, Thank you universe 💜🌚😍👽🐶🌝❤🌈🐎🌷🌹🕊💛♘💙😃👁💚🌲☘🦄
I appreciate this video so damn much word to my life I’m learning a lot you answered my questions.
So true my sister ❤
Plainly stated, you’re very helpful. Looking forward to the new found clarity your insight has fostered in my life. Thank you! Happy Blessed New Year!!!
This is good. Thank you.
I stopped caring the min I walked out the door. cause I've been thru it before with my ex narc for 9yrs. The resent ex narc I was with for a year and a half. Started seeing narc treats after a year of being together and knew it wasn't going to last and wasn't a relationship that I wanted to be in. After she gave me the silent treatment for a week that's when I said ok I'm done. Packed my belongings and walked out the door and never looked back. It's been almost 2 months. I'm good and don't care about the narc. Living my life and moving forward in a positive manner.
This message resonates. Great points of understanding. Guidance. Thx AM.
Thank you for all you do!
They're running away and trying to find unsuspecting people to join them on their trip of running away.
So true Anoushka
I have followed you for 5 years and this makes so much sense. Thank you for all the help.
They even have problems of telling their real name
Sadly I was so infatuated with him that I don’t even remember him calling me by my first name. He never did. Huge red flag.
Brilliant
😅Ifwe were doing really well we wouldnt be watching your video..😅😅😅 The gosl is to be feeling better AFTER having watched your instructional video😊😊😊I was after watching the last one. Thank you😊😊
Spot on thanku ❤for your help
I told the narc I am starting to see who he really is. Haven't heard from him in 4 weeks. 😂😂😂 I mentally checkout of the relationship 6 months prior to detaching. I feel free because I know he is not wired the way normal people are.
Wow 🥰 Anoushka 🥰 , I never thought about it like that before , and it is true
On point
Sooo true🔥
Your advice I thank you for so much