So true, no pillow talk here. No talking about building a life together, lots of future faking, his life never changed a bit, and it wasn't going to. Waiting, waiting for something to happen, he was sooooooo stuck. Frozen in time. I took my power back, walked and never looked back. Healing and taking a man/break, all good.
Cold heartless Jekyll & Hyde characters. Pillow talk non existent. Wham bam thank you man. Than they find a newer replacement - younger by 21 years 😂 at 57 🙈 older they get the more delusional they become.
I am struggling so badly right now. I’m sitting at my desk at work holding back tears. I had never been with a narcissist and he has broken me. He discarded me a few days before Xmas and I am shattered. I’m a deep empath and thought I could love him enough to fix him and make our relationship work. He dumped me and disappeared and I’m left broken. How do I let go of this? I’m so hurt and so offended, how do I let it all go?
They 100% don’t care. I told her once that she was losing me and she straight up replied “I don’t care”. And she has/had back-ups upon back-ups. Emotionless, no empathy, fake, hallow shell of a person.
Mine said to me after he raged at me saying I was moody because I was yrying to keep my hair dry with my Umbrella that he was sorry for shouting but if I wanted to leave I could but I was never allowed to come back if I did leave. How the feck?? I just pretended I wanted to stay (I should've got an Oscar for my role as I'd done that much Grey Rocking I was articulate at it). Then this morning whilst he was out I got my things together and left after I told him 'feck you' then blocked him.
Keep going you can do it. I did it after 35 years together. 4 months ago I walked away. I exposed him in public. I discarded him, went no contact and asked him to leave the house. I caused him a serious narcissists injury. First I exposed him, abandoned him and shamed him. The biggest FEAR of the narcissists. I did all 3 together in one day. 4 months on I am doing great thank God. I am still in no contact. Life is good now thank God. So you can do this. Walk away for good.
@@jonathanomahony688 Proud of you there, mine was short lived. But the last 4 months for me go heavier and heavier. New years morning was the breaking point for me
If you leave them before they decided they're done with you then they harass you, call you selfish and self serving, scream at you, call you terrible names, and rage at you. If you leave them after they're done with you then they will respond to you like an overly formal polite brief worded co-worker and you will feel like someone just moved the chair away that you were about to sit down in and you fall to the ground and everyone including the narcissist is laughing at you for falling and getting hurt and having this look of surprise and fear on your face and you look up at the narcissist and they have either an apathetic or gleeful look on their face that says, "Gotchya!"
Wow if this wasn't on point. She discarded and every interaction we had after that was brief and like I was speaking to an attorney. Very formal and to the point. Later on, I gathered that she projected me as the Narcissist and was more than likely "Grey Rocking" me since I'm sure that was the narrative, she gave her minions, and they probably encouraged her delusion and had her responding to me that way
100%. After arguments he started he would say he was putting the house up for sale that we had only just bought. At one point he threatened me and when he said he was selling the house, I told him to do it. He tried to talk me out of it even until minutes before the estate agent arrived, I told him he threatened me and I was done with him. In the end he bought me out 3 months after we bought it. I was still in the house until he got the mortgage and I could find somewhere to live. In the next 11 weeks before I got out, the abuse was horrific. He turned off his stand alone freezer ruining all my newly bought frozen food, turned the heating off in my bedroom, banned me from rooms in the house, banned me from using the cooker, took his kettle to work and to not use his dishes. Barged into my bedroom, where I was basically living 24/7, without knocking just to mouth off or intimidate me, it got so bad I had to install a camera in my room. I had been voice recording him for months by this time and gave them to the Police as he was starting to really scare me. They have called him in for a voluntary interview and I have to go back to do a video statement. They say I have a case to take him to court for harassing me. All this because I told him I didn’t want him. Evil.
You are right. The moment I accepted the reality, I set my boundaries to the ground and, he accused me of being a difficult person, the campaing to makes me look the bad person started. But I don't care, I love and respect myself, and I will never accept being disrespect again. Thank you Anoushka!
I always compare it to a persons relationship with their vehicle…they love their new car, worked hard to get it, got in debt getting credit to afford it, takes care of it, shows it off….(love bombing) then they find fault with the vehicle, they look past the fault and find more (devalue), they see a newer younger car, they believe this car would be more reliable and make them look better (discard), they start to devalue their existing car…. Then they scrap it….then they realise this newer car isn’t what they expected so they go back to the scrap yard (hoover) but decide a newer car would be better and so on…(discard) so yes people are objects….not really valued….
But when they "care", they seek only how to devastate you and how to get pleasure from your downfalls, not to mention that they are gathering "informations" what is filthy about you to tell the next stories about it without stop. Thank You!!:))!!
Good chance you deliberately revealed sensitive information to your person all the while knowing the risk that it may be used at some point as retaliation. You did so because your afraid to untether from your person and wishes he would come back with the retaliation just so you could receive the attention of that moment of drama which you secretly love. you love when men revisit and waste time on you. That’s the only special you will experience in this life honey.
@@ronniesamaroo1775 ah bless you rage at your disfunction. She would have been using the information in the context of yes I get your damaged but we all are some of us are capable of understanding what our part is even if it is only the emotionally exploited consent. Anyone that could spout that bollox is clearly broken good luck in your recovery dickhead
@@stevereid4092 I usually diss people on here relentlessly but I’m interested in your perspective, would you care to elucidate me further? I didn’t quite understand your first response.
Or they want something from you and make puppy eyes. But when they do not need anything from you, they ignore you. If you dare to say no to them, oh Lord. Insane people. And imagine, these kind of people are in power positions and also in church. Insanity
I wish it were possible to like a video a thousand times over!! The harsh truth is better than a pretty lie. I'm saving this for whenever I need that reminder.♥
I so agree they dont care about you other than an object to use and abuse. it has taken me 3 months of the latest hanging up on me and realizing i meant nothing to him as a person
"Transactional"...so correct. I hate to say this, but my narcissist girlfriend used to tell me "Thank you"....after sex. I was like...wtf is up with that?? But it did occur to me it was based on a transactional mind set. She would also invite her ex husband to our Christmas gatherings...and this was someone she told me she couldn't stand to be around, however he has money, and of course, she wants that money. She always made me feel like I was being judged, held at arms length in her hierarchy men in her life...past, present and future. After putting up with this crap for five years, she called me up and ended our relationship abruptly over the phone....and I said ok, go. After 2 years of no contact she has tried to hoover me 3 times....no dice. These people are incredibly toxic, it feels so good to be free of that.
Anoushka, I could never figure him out. I NEVER even knew what a narc was until I finally left him. I learned sooo much, and still learning. They are not human! I really loved him, and my gut feeling kept telling me to RUN from him. I didn't listen. Boy, I LISTEN NOW! God only knows what these people are.
I love the phone analogy. Such a perfect example. They absolutely do not care. Never did. It's hard for us to accept because we can't relate, as we have genuine feelings. These people are sick. I have finally broken free of the nonsensical cycle and the way I done it is educating myself on this condition. I watched these videos religiously and just forced myself to accept the situation for what it was. I hope everyone who's going through this can do the same. Thank you Anoushka for helping us see through these monsters and having the tools to heal 😊
Years??? Sheesh you clearly aren't allowing yourself to meet other guys. You only love someone the most until you love the next person the most. ITS BEEN OVER A YEAR IF YOU CONFESS OR HE FINDS OUT, OH LORD HOW EMBARRASSING & DETRIMENTAL TO YOUR HEALTH! THE TREATMENT NEVER GETS BETTER. THE LONGER THEY HAVE YOU THE WORSE THEY'LL TREAT YOU. These kinds of people know what they're doing is wrong. They see you hurting. They disrespect you anyway. They choose to hurt you. They're literally Intentionally hurting the person, that they KNOW loves them. Intentionally. On purpose. Enjoying your pain..it's twisted. Satanic. And disgusting. Stop thinking about that ma'fr right now!
True! As they behave more narcissistically their emotional centers simply shrivel up and their ability to care about anyone else but themselves is nonexistent! 😱
You hit the nail on the head Anoushka my ex always use to say I don't care about anything and what's wrong with you (me) when he was gone 5 months ago he found this love bombing scammer on line and he lost $ 390.000 I think karma has been surfed to him what a joke he was a abusive alcoholic narcissist to me and got worse when he is older now at least I'm happy and have peace again they are poisonous snakes
A narcissist don't care.. they have no heart to feel anything like an empath does. It's been over 5 months for my discard, thank the Lord he's not tried to contact me.
And don't forget if they are very young and good looking...supply is easy as candy 🍭🍬 Supply literally falls in their lap..waiting to do their bidding. Don't have to work hard...Mine was really good looking but he has a very sweet .loving kind side very vulnerable side...then there's the other side. 😅 That's another story
I realize most people think this applies to love relationships but my narcissist daughter has replaced me with new mothers at least 3 times. Now that she's 45 she may find it difficult to find new mothers. So be it.
My daughter is 18. I have raised all my kids myself as I was a housewife. She is "affiliated" with this Narcissistic woman who runs this "connect group". She basically has found a replacement mom for herself.
In the beginning whenever I expressed my gratitude for anything nice my ex narc did for me he would respond with his now no longer puzzling phrase:"Nice? I'll put it on the invoice." Little did I know what I would be in for. Boy oh boy. I didn't know what he was.
He had my replacement within a day of us ending it for good. I was still in the house we bought 3 months earlier so he could get a mortgage to buy my share and for me to find somewhere else to live. He would put their calls on speakerphone, come in to get clothes out of the wardrobes in my room (the only ones in the house) and for his weekend bag to go to hers. I could hear him tell his harem and his son how wonderful she was. He then said something to trigger her (I can guess that) and she wanted 2 weeks time out to think. The next day he was phoning 3 off the same dating website he met us and previous ones on, she phoned and I heard him say he loved her to bits and wanted her to move in once I was gone or sell both houses and consolidate. As soon as he ended the call, he was straight back onto the 3 replacements. That’s how much he cares about anyone….HE DOESNT.
Basically just match and copy people’s intentions at this point and you’ll see whatever you want! It’s fair and equal. We never have to go through this again!
Glad I took my power back. It’s been difficult picking up the pieces of my life, but I’m proud of myself after so much overstepping my boundaries and him not backing me up.
I knew my Narc wasn't bothered about losing me because all his words... "I love you and will stand by you and look after you and won't let you go or let anyone take you away from me" never ma5ched his actions of "If you want to go you can go if you want, but if you do you can't come back". 🍒
I feel the narc is showing me more respect now that he has discarded me....I don't have to listen to his complaints, showing no love, putting me down, not making any future plans, continuously talking about other girls. It's respectful that he's gone.
Near the end, I felt like he was a typical schoolyard bully. Holding things over my head and poking at me. And he still tries to- because of those fake "happily ever after" photos of him and his new girlfriend...but once I took myself "out of his audience" (so to speak), I do feel like I can truly get a real grasp on healing and moving forward. Also, he looks absolutely ridiculous parading this woman around anyway. It's also true that they "downgrade" (not to sound mean) to twist the knife. Frankly, I'm not a fan of the woman, but he made sure to pit us up against each other. He really is trash. She can have him and all of that unnecessary negativity and misery. Also he still has some of my belongings and owes me money. I know he will try to come back one day because of this. He THINKS that is his way to keep his foot in the door, but I know what he's gonna do before he does, and I KNOW the worst isn't over yet. He is gonna be PISSED when he realizes that he no longer controls me, and that he really no longer has ANY access to me. One day. It's coming.
Omg you just told my story ..going through this right now. Posting happiness pictures, partying with new girlfriend, they moved together and he took along some of my belongings to his new Apt, he owns me money , never cares about it .omg ...stay strong
@Delf I definitely still have my days too...but I also know that me being happy without him will annoy him. And I can make more money and replace my things, while he needs to leech off others to get by.
12:47 this part is 💯 true, I’ve been experiencing this w my soon to be ex. Idk if this is the right course of being cordial & nice while still pushing things along for the divorce but she definitely has made comments showing her true intentions & it’s not because she cares about me or my needs or respects me, no no. I have moved on & reached a place of gratitude but even for me this is all new waters I’m navigating.
yes, yes, yes. I know she never loved me. I know it by finally internalizing her behavior and working hard to understand her psychology. I divorced her 8 months ago. But being alone is so very painful. More painful than being with her. I still hope for her attention. I still want a nurturing relationship with her. I know it's not there, never will be. But I still long for it. This is so crazy making. My feelings and my brain are not connected. So my concern is with me. She will do fine in her limited way.....but will I?
Same here... It is really difficult to accept the truth and it is because we want to believe it was real. Accepting it was all a lie is the hardest thing ever... Devastating to our reality and understanding of humanity... The fight is accepting there is pure evil in the world. We saw it, but we loved the illusion, so it is the worst fight ever...
Been there and bought the t-shirt. The thing you need to tell yourself daily is, you will get past this, and she isn’t living her best life, she is living in her own little Hell, which is in her head and that will never ever change. It’s been about 6 months since I have last seen my ex- narc and I am so glad she is out of my life due to all the half truths, lies, triangulation, and cheating the whole time we were together! Sad human being. We got this! Stay strong!!!
Thank you all for your kind words. I guess I loved and needed this lie. Time to claw my way back to reality. It’s a hard and sad lesson to learn in this life.
@@bradleywhitaker1085 I'm really sorry you are going through this do you best to create activity around yourself. I started with 5 push ups 5 sit ups 5 squats each day and added on each day. I'm way healthier than I've ever been after 8months of hell from my ex narc gf. She finally discarded me right before Christmas...I knew it was real. Because it was the first time in those 8months she ghosted me silently without all the drama. Some people are just immature at heart. Do your you best to press on. We love you and we all are routing for your full recovery.
And the person told me at the beginning they arent going anywhere. At devalue they did leave even though physically there. Let them get from others in the same way they did from me. Good luck.
I could never understand how he just accepted it when we ended he never got upset whereas I did and he replaced me every time we broke up within a couple of days week at the most he said that was how he got over me !!! this time I don’t care,
Same here, I couldn't believe how he can be over it almost immediately after discard when only day before he claimed he loved me. They are so broken and empty inside, there's simply nothing in them to love. They fake everything throughout their whole life.
@@user-bk3xs4gd1v I totally agree mine was over it within days every time we broke up he was with someone straight away, I just didn’t want to believe he was a narcissist I thought I wasn’t enough so glad to have found the support
Dang me too same thing happened to me I was like well I'm going to leave you alone then because it seems like you don't want me anymore and he just texted back "Ok" to my long heartfelt message filled with anguish and resignation. That's it!!! After all his rage fits and the sexting and intimacy and back and forth and late night long phone calls pouring our hearts out to each other about our pasts and him saying he would NEVER hurt, abandon, use, or objectify my body or waste my time and then he literally just did all that and said he decided to work things out with his ex because they just "have so much more history together and moved here to california be with her and didn't think to mention any of this to me until after he got to sleep with me and get me completely 100% emotionally invested and cut off all my other options out of respect for him because I fell for the sob story about how broken he was after his ex cheated on him!!!!! What the actual f!!!!! And after it all he just says "ok". Ok. Ok?? OK?! JUST OK?! NO IT'S NOT JUST "OK" YOU SADIST!!!!!!🤦FINE GO BACK TO THE GIRLFRIEND IT DIDN'T WORK OUT WITH THE FIRST GO AROUND THAT YOU MOVED HERE FOR AND USED MY TIME EMOTIONS AND BODY LIKE A GODDAMN LAYOVER FLIGHT IN BETWEEN YOUR DAMN MAKE UP BREAK UPS WITH YOUR F*CKING PRECIOUS HOLIER THAN THOU "SO MUCH MORE HISTORY AND STUFF" EX!!!!!!!
Some people won't be able to wrap their heads around this comment Every person is simply transactional. There is no depth in the viewpoint of the Puddle. The Puddle has absolutely no emotional connection. This can be explained "The Looking Glass Concept' Parallel forms of idealization going on at the same time. All Narcissistic people show their own mirror in their idealization of the other person. While mirroring the idealization in the first and 3rd phase. In a sense that means mirroring is going in 2 different ways. The Narcissist is imitating what you love or deserve in the 1st phase. At the same time, the Narcissist is also shown a vulnerability in this phase. Which is not truly felt nor understood by the other person. Which creates the toxicity of the 3rd phase" The other person lost before they even started this process of an illusion of a relationship.
My absence is felt deeply. To the core. Rattles the cage of the false self they identify with. I pray that one day they may awaken. Until then, I move on to my greater purpose. Be Blessed. Always.
It's nice that she doesn't care about me. She told me a few times I'll never get rid of her, and quite honestly that statement scare the sh....out of me.
It's sad. But...I'm right. He's a narcissist and people around him are blind. He can't change because he thinks I'm the sole problem of everything when that's not really true. He was a cheater before I encountered him, but I was blinded by his facade. His relationships fall apart because he cheats all the time.
What hurts most is realising she doesn’t love me and most likely never did and that I’m the only who fell in love and loved her. My narcissistic ex broke up with me then gave me the silent treatment, ignored me and ghosted and discarded me and I’ll never know why she hurt me like this and caused me all this pain and suffering. She has put me through one of the most painful experiences of my life and 3 months after the discard I am still thinking about her everyday and it is torture. I can’t even put the pain into words.
When you move forward, more than likely you’ll hear from her. Don’t answer. Don’t look back…Don’t take her back. She hasn’t changed, no matter how much she swears she has.
But you do not know of she loved you , also narcisisstic people can love - coverts with traits of FA can - to a certain degree when they have avoidant traits. I am being ghosted too 3rd time ..but this time I won't go back ..although I am hurting so much and the pain is so strong that I cannot describe it and nobody who never loved as deeply as I did love him will ever understand. I cannot understand his cruelty. He was mostly kind to me. leaving me abandoned breaks my soul He made me feel loved and safe. It nearly destroys me down to my core. I stay no contact.
The perfect test for a narcissist is give them the book How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. This book is like throwing water on a witch. They absolutely cannot stand it. It makes them foam at the mouth
I’ve heard this info many times, in diff ways, from diff experts etc. but there was something incredibly comforting and reassuring about the way you conveyed it. I’m glad I found your channel. Thank you so much for learning about NPD so that you can help those of us who have endured this torment. You’ve helped me turn around my day, and I’m grateful.
Yes they have huge barriers put up to self and others. Yes replaceable. Already have others lined up. And then devalue shows itself and they wont explain a damm thing to you. So let them wonder the details now with no contact. If they even care. They are focusing on new people as they have been. I felt mostly dumped like trash without a thought. Definitely like an object in the end. She could never tell me why she was my friend. Emotional validation. Done.
For me it boils down to two bulletpoints: 1. It was indeed my fault: I recognized always that I was used for their needs. But I wanted to provide my skills to the comunity, the orchestras, and wanted to create my music. Therefore I swallowed always what was thrown at me and stayed far too long until I collapsed twice. I should have considered that my ideals aren´t theirs and therefore should have come to the only correct conclusion, that I lived an illusion of friendship and working together for our goals, not for selfish reasons. 2. George Orwell discribed in "Animal Farm" very vividly how society works and how it is occupied by narcissits, and how idialistic idiots like me always stay in the ideal to serve the community, but in reality just are played for the narcissitic needs. Yes, I became quite embittered. And don´t think that this will change.
@Sandra U. So your solution is to fantasize about an imaginary friend who supports and understands you. Interesting. And you´re looking for seemingly vulnerable people to exploit them or to suck them into your delusion. I find that fairly disgusting.
@@monikaschroder2328 It's disheartening, isn't it? I have the feeling, and observed quite some time, that the social fabrique is increasingly endangered because narcissists are so very rarely stopped by the people who should have an interest in sustain the community.
@@teddlyt That's the right move, I do as well. But, as you certainly know, when you gave so much for your, as others ever tell you unreachable, goals and have succeded in that, it is brutal to loose it because of constantly unfair treatment of people who only work for themselves.
So correct all the info. Well, he was always the one, breaking no contact as i have stuck to it, for a year. I still remember, i went no contact Oct 4 2021, a month later, he calls, under the blocked number on the day, i was working. And then, he stalked me at gatherings with his friends, 3 times and then silence then right after, he told his church he is upset of my birthday party. That was the last. I hope i don't hear anymore in 2023 about him. 🤞🤞🤞
Yes! The narcs ego processes were not completed or misformed in early childood ie like a person in the early years where their skeleton did not form normally so the person has a life long deformity. Thereafter their adaption to this disaster is their persona ie the NPD, the narcissistic personality disorder😕
These people are very difficult people who don't care about anyone or anything they Pretend to be a nice person. They're not really a nice person. They hate you because They can't be like you. It would be actually like be like actually be a real person then being someone who really isn't that is something these people can't take! And that one word is Responsibility!
Once they don't get their way and ghost you, do NOT forgive them. They won't change and just want to use you. Go hard no contact, block them, get your power back and find someone real with whom you can have a loving relationship. Life is too short to obsess over a person who objectifies you, who devalues you because they don't get their selfish needs met.
No depth is spot on! I’m a realist and a deep thinker , I’m always interested in learning what makes someone tick , she rarely ever asked me about me… she said she didn’t do that, because she didn’t want to seem intrusive. I believed and accepted that for 2 years, but the invalidation, lack of emotional empathy , sympathy, curiosity of me as a human being took its toll. I broke it off 3 weeks ago , I’m still trying to find a place to move , she stays gone , she will never be self reflective and see her part in why I’m leaving. It was a lesbian relationship, I’ve found in the gay community narcissistic people are rampant
I’m lucky he’s stayed no contact but he does owe me money and I have deleted his phone numbers but tbh I doubt I will get the money back it’s the only thing for him to contact me about I’m so relieved I left him
Is the money really worth it??? Amanda, if you decide you don't care about that money, you can make a clean break...AND YOU WILL FEEL SOOOO EMPOWERED!! No amt of money is worth losing your peace of mind! 🤗
@@SweepDailyWin thank you and you’re right I don’t care about the money for the reason I would rather lose it than have to have contact with him it’s the 5th time we’ve broken up and this is my last I won’t let him back in again
They don't care about losing you but they will care about what you gave them the energy they got from you depending on how much energy money or what you call Supply narcissistic Supply they got from you so missing you personally your person no but missing what you did for them yes everybody brings something unique to the table the more Supply you gave her narcissist the more likely they're going to miss that Supply the more of a giver you are the more of a loving person you are the more that, will play in their head
Woooow you are perfectly describing my wife !!!! I was so blindly in love with her for 23 years!!! And i thought the way she is, that's normal. Until she found her "male best friend that understand her"!! i have had enough and left her. I met her when she was single mother with 3 years old boy. We raised the boy he is 26 now and we had a daughter she is 18 now. So whole this time my wife was using me !!! I am so fucking stupid !!! unbelievable !!!!
I don't understand yes they are terrible human beings but it's like going in circles with pretty much the same information. I put the effort in to myself instead of into the narcissist. I know why she used me and it is a gift to be kind considerate and care and love others and also things.. so she doesn't get it from me and will never again.. pretty much everyone experiences loss it does hurt when you realize what it really was but I don't treat people that way .. so it is what it is and now I'm just overwhelmed with the thought of the freedom I again have. I can't believe how the weight lifted off of me when I heard from her mouth.. it's over.. physically.. I love you all. Try to see the gift you where given.
My malignant actually told me I was a liability not an asset. When I figured them out and stood up for truth he said I was a liability!! Lol! What a clown. These narcissists are delusional and literally insane. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. They repeat these abusive cycles over and over their entire lives. Insane! I went blackout no contact and healed. It’s the only way to recover your life. God bless! 🙏🙏🙏
It is so hard to recover your life, my covert made me think he loved me and yI felt safe. Now he is ghosting me butvdudt block me. I am still hurting and on no contact.😢.
So true, no pillow talk here. No talking about building a life together, lots of future faking, his life never changed a bit, and it wasn't going to. Waiting, waiting for something to happen, he was sooooooo stuck. Frozen in time. I took my power back, walked and never looked back. Healing and taking a man/break, all good.
I would ask everyday for pillow talk.. he’d never 👎🏼
Cold heartless Jekyll & Hyde characters. Pillow talk non existent. Wham bam thank you man. Than they find a newer replacement - younger by 21 years 😂 at 57 🙈 older they get the more delusional they become.
Ditto.
Yes
I am struggling so badly right now. I’m sitting at my desk at work holding back tears. I had never been with a narcissist and he has broken me. He discarded me a few days before Xmas and I am shattered. I’m a deep empath and thought I could love him enough to fix him and make our relationship work. He dumped me and disappeared and I’m left broken. How do I let go of this? I’m so hurt and so offended, how do I let it all go?
They 100% don’t care. I told her once that she was losing me and she straight up replied “I don’t care”. And she has/had back-ups upon back-ups.
Emotionless, no empathy, fake, hallow shell of a person.
Mine said to me after he raged at me saying I was moody because I was yrying to keep my hair dry with my Umbrella that he was sorry for shouting but if I wanted to leave I could but I was never allowed to come back if I did leave. How the feck?? I just pretended I wanted to stay (I should've got an Oscar for my role as I'd done that much Grey Rocking I was articulate at it). Then this morning whilst he was out I got my things together and left after I told him 'feck you' then blocked him.
Yes many many back ups
They pretend to be you! That is soooo true! They fake being the person they think you want! It's genius really!
Relationships with narcs are superficial but they are expert at creating illusion of depth.
That sounds so poetic hahahahaha
@@doppiahh8164 Yes, they are ridiculous. When I remember my narc's tricks...pathetic.I was 19 though🙂
That is true they create an illusion of dephts 💯
Day 6 no contact, here we go.
Needed this one for the start of the day.
Thanks
Keep it up it does get easier I’m 5 weeks just and feeling stronger every day
7 weeks and the feeling sorta fades a little, I still miss her but I choose myself first
Keep going you can do it.
I did it after 35 years together.
4 months ago I walked away.
I exposed him in public.
I discarded him, went no contact and asked him to leave the house.
I caused him a serious narcissists injury.
First I exposed him, abandoned him and shamed him.
The biggest FEAR of the narcissists.
I did all 3 together in one day.
4 months on I am doing great thank God.
I am still in no contact.
Life is good now thank God.
So you can do this.
Walk away for good.
@@jonathanomahony688 Proud of you there, mine was short lived. But the last 4 months for me go heavier and heavier. New years morning was the breaking point for me
Almost a week on, feels like I'm having flashbacks.
If you leave them before they decided they're done with you then they harass you, call you selfish and self serving, scream at you, call you terrible names, and rage at you.
If you leave them after they're done with you then they will respond to you like an overly formal polite brief worded co-worker and you will feel like someone just moved the chair away that you were about to sit down in and you fall to the ground and everyone including the narcissist is laughing at you for falling and getting hurt and having this look of surprise and fear on your face and you look up at the narcissist and they have either an apathetic or gleeful look on their face that says, "Gotchya!"
Wow if this wasn't on point. She discarded and every interaction we had after that was brief and like I was speaking to an attorney. Very formal and to the point. Later on, I gathered that she projected me as the Narcissist and was more than likely "Grey Rocking" me since I'm sure that was the narrative, she gave her minions, and they probably encouraged her delusion and had her responding to me that way
100%. After arguments he started he would say he was putting the house up for sale that we had only just bought. At one point he threatened me and when he said he was selling the house, I told him to do it. He tried to talk me out of it even until minutes before the estate agent arrived, I told him he threatened me and I was done with him. In the end he bought me out 3 months after we bought it. I was still in the house until he got the mortgage and I could find somewhere to live. In the next 11 weeks before I got out, the abuse was horrific. He turned off his stand alone freezer ruining all my newly bought frozen food, turned the heating off in my bedroom, banned me from rooms in the house, banned me from using the cooker, took his kettle to work and to not use his dishes. Barged into my bedroom, where I was basically living 24/7, without knocking just to mouth off or intimidate me, it got so bad I had to install a camera in my room. I had been voice recording him for months by this time and gave them to the Police as he was starting to really scare me. They have called him in for a voluntary interview and I have to go back to do a video statement. They say I have a case to take him to court for harassing me. All this because I told him I didn’t want him. Evil.
So true…
So true…
Yes they call you every thing they are 😅 Very twisted individuals
You are right. The moment I accepted the reality, I set my boundaries to the ground and, he accused me of being a difficult person, the campaing to makes me look the bad person started. But I don't care, I love and respect myself, and I will never accept being disrespect again. Thank you Anoushka!
“At the beginning of the relationship they were so lovely”… which makes this so much harder
Nobody should be disrespect.
I always compare it to a persons relationship with their vehicle…they love their new car, worked hard to get it, got in debt getting credit to afford it, takes care of it, shows it off….(love bombing) then they find fault with the vehicle, they look past the fault and find more (devalue), they see a newer younger car, they believe this car would be more reliable and make them look better (discard), they start to devalue their existing car…. Then they scrap it….then they realise this newer car isn’t what they expected so they go back to the scrap yard (hoover) but decide a newer car would be better and so on…(discard) so yes people are objects….not really valued….
Jane888, u have summed it up in 1. Brilliant. I know it is a serious .matter and so devastating . You made me laugh. 😀👍🌟
You are a genious ..all true
I stood my ground and took my power back from him and he blamed ghosted me and went silent. Went through a very hard lesson to know he never cared.
But you thought he cared didn't you?. He made you think he loved you?.my covert did . I am heartbrokenen him ghosting me 12th week 3rd time 😢
I don't want them to care. Caring leads to guilt.✌️ I hate their guts.
With some narcissist the issue is all about money therefore they are extremely vulnerable when you decide to give them NOTHING!
True abolutely true 💯 but they pretend they don't want money from you and you think they love you, they made you believe this
But when they "care", they seek only how to devastate you and how to get pleasure from your downfalls, not to mention that they are gathering "informations" what is filthy about you to tell the next stories about it without stop. Thank You!!:))!!
Good chance you deliberately revealed sensitive information to your person all the while knowing the risk that it may be used at some point as retaliation. You did so because your afraid to untether from your person and wishes he would come back with the retaliation just so you could receive the attention of that moment of drama which you secretly love. you love when men revisit and waste time on you. That’s the only special you will experience in this life honey.
@@ronniesamaroo1775 ah bless you rage at your disfunction. She would have been using the information in the context of yes I get your damaged but we all are some of us are capable of understanding what our part is even if it is only the emotionally exploited consent. Anyone that could spout that bollox is clearly broken good luck in your recovery dickhead
@@stevereid4092 I usually diss people on here relentlessly but I’m interested in your perspective, would you care to elucidate me further? I didn’t quite understand your first response.
Or they want something from you and make puppy eyes. But when they do not need anything from you, they ignore you. If you dare to say no to them, oh Lord. Insane people. And imagine, these kind of people are in power positions and also in church. Insanity
I wish it were possible to like a video a thousand times over!! The harsh truth is better than a pretty lie. I'm saving this for whenever I need that reminder.♥
I so agree they dont care about you other than an object to use and abuse. it has taken me 3 months of the latest hanging up on me and realizing i meant nothing to him as a person
New Year
New Me
2023 NARC FREE!!!
Sing it!
Likewise... I'm glad I left the narcissist 👍💯😂🤣
Amen🥳🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
"Transactional"...so correct. I hate to say this, but my narcissist girlfriend used to tell me "Thank you"....after sex. I was like...wtf is up with that?? But it did occur to me it was based on a transactional mind set. She would also invite her ex husband to our Christmas gatherings...and this was someone she told me she couldn't stand to be around, however he has money, and of course, she wants that money. She always made me feel like I was being judged, held at arms length in her hierarchy men in her life...past, present and future. After putting up with this crap for five years, she called me up and ended our relationship abruptly over the phone....and I said ok, go. After 2 years of no contact she has tried to hoover me 3 times....no dice. These people are incredibly toxic, it feels so good to be free of that.
I relate to this. I appreciate you sharing man.
@@JesusSavedMeFromASuicideAtempt Exactly the same thing , thank you after sex, god, like who the hell am i with?
Anoushka, I could never figure him out. I NEVER even knew what a narc was until I finally left him. I learned sooo much, and still learning. They are not human! I really loved him, and my gut feeling kept telling me to RUN from him. I didn't listen. Boy, I LISTEN NOW! God only knows what these people are.
They destroy you if you truly loved them
I love the phone analogy. Such a perfect example. They absolutely do not care. Never did. It's hard for us to accept because we can't relate, as we have genuine feelings. These people are sick.
I have finally broken free of the nonsensical cycle and the way I done it is educating myself on this condition. I watched these videos religiously and just forced myself to accept the situation for what it was. I hope everyone who's going through this can do the same.
Thank you Anoushka for helping us see through these monsters and having the tools to heal 😊
Narcissists collect partners like Pokemon cards.
I am suffering since years after leaving him, because I miss him and I am longing for him and the good feelings he gave me.
This is so sad. I fear the same for me
He was a fake my friend. Move on to a better life for yourself true love 😊 bless you
Years??? Sheesh you clearly aren't allowing yourself to meet other guys. You only love someone the most until you love the next person the most. ITS BEEN OVER A YEAR IF YOU CONFESS OR HE FINDS OUT, OH LORD HOW EMBARRASSING & DETRIMENTAL TO YOUR HEALTH! THE TREATMENT NEVER GETS BETTER. THE LONGER THEY HAVE YOU THE WORSE THEY'LL TREAT YOU.
These kinds of people know what they're doing is wrong. They see you hurting. They disrespect you anyway. They choose to hurt you. They're literally Intentionally hurting the person, that they KNOW loves them. Intentionally. On purpose. Enjoying your pain..it's twisted. Satanic. And disgusting. Stop thinking about that ma'fr right now!
True! As they behave more narcissistically their emotional centers simply shrivel up and their ability to care about anyone else but themselves is nonexistent! 😱
It is so sad but I haven seen all this played out in front of my eyes many times with my ex narc girlfriend. I confirm it 100%.
You hit the nail on the head Anoushka my ex always use to say I don't care about anything and what's wrong with you (me) when he was gone 5 months ago he found this love bombing scammer on line and he lost $ 390.000 I think karma has been surfed to him what a joke he was a abusive alcoholic narcissist to me and got worse when he is older now at least I'm happy and have peace again they are poisonous snakes
Absolutely on the money . I wish I knew this 15 years ago. Very helpful and explaining a lot I didn't understand at the time. Many thanks.
A narcissist don't care.. they have no heart to feel anything like an empath does. It's been over 5 months for my discard, thank the Lord he's not tried to contact me.
Thanks for keeping me in line with no contact because this is all true and feelings I’ve had since the beginning of the relationship.
And don't forget if they are very young and good looking...supply is easy as candy 🍭🍬 Supply literally falls in their lap..waiting to do their bidding. Don't have to work hard...Mine was really good looking but he has a very sweet .loving kind side very vulnerable side...then there's the other side. 😅 That's another story
I realize most people think this applies to love relationships but my narcissist daughter has replaced me with new mothers at least 3 times. Now that she's 45 she may find it difficult to find new mothers. So be it.
My daughter is 18. I have raised all my kids myself as I was a housewife. She is "affiliated" with this Narcissistic woman who runs this "connect group". She basically has found a replacement mom for herself.
In the beginning whenever I expressed my gratitude for anything nice my ex narc did for me he would respond with his now no longer puzzling phrase:"Nice? I'll put it on the invoice." Little did I know what I would be in for. Boy oh boy. I didn't know what he was.
I agree that they are people collectors. So agree!!! Good way to put it.
He had my replacement within a day of us ending it for good. I was still in the house we bought 3 months earlier so he could get a mortgage to buy my share and for me to find somewhere else to live. He would put their calls on speakerphone, come in to get clothes out of the wardrobes in my room (the only ones in the house) and for his weekend bag to go to hers. I could hear him tell his harem and his son how wonderful she was. He then said something to trigger her (I can guess that) and she wanted 2 weeks time out to think. The next day he was phoning 3 off the same dating website he met us and previous ones on, she phoned and I heard him say he loved her to bits and wanted her to move in once I was gone or sell both houses and consolidate. As soon as he ended the call, he was straight back onto the 3 replacements. That’s how much he cares about anyone….HE DOESNT.
Basically just match and copy people’s intentions at this point and you’ll see whatever you want! It’s fair and equal. We never have to go through this again!
Glad I took my power back. It’s been difficult picking up the pieces of my life, but I’m proud of myself after so much overstepping my boundaries and him not backing me up.
So all this is true.
But they never get enough returning.
Such a dysfunctional cycle
who's snoring😂😂😂. I had to pause and listen around my house. Love your content
sounds like a dog snoring!
Devil has no heart they don’t care
I knew my Narc wasn't bothered about losing me because all his words... "I love you and will stand by you and look after you and won't let you go or let anyone take you away from me" never ma5ched his actions of "If you want to go you can go if you want, but if you do you can't come back". 🍒
yup they are nonchalant
❤️❤️❤️👍🙏❤️❤️❤️
I feel the narc is showing me more respect now that he has discarded me....I don't have to listen to his complaints, showing no love, putting me down, not making any future plans, continuously talking about other girls. It's respectful that he's gone.
Near the end, I felt like he was a typical schoolyard bully. Holding things over my head and poking at me. And he still tries to- because of those fake "happily ever after" photos of him and his new girlfriend...but once I took myself "out of his audience" (so to speak), I do feel like I can truly get a real grasp on healing and moving forward. Also, he looks absolutely ridiculous parading this woman around anyway. It's also true that they "downgrade" (not to sound mean) to twist the knife. Frankly, I'm not a fan of the woman, but he made sure to pit us up against each other. He really is trash. She can have him and all of that unnecessary negativity and misery.
Also he still has some of my belongings and owes me money. I know he will try to come back one day because of this. He THINKS that is his way to keep his foot in the door, but I know what he's gonna do before he does, and I KNOW the worst isn't over yet. He is gonna be PISSED when he realizes that he no longer controls me, and that he really no longer has ANY access to me. One day. It's coming.
Omg you just told my story ..going through this right now. Posting happiness pictures, partying with new girlfriend, they moved together and he took along some of my belongings to his new Apt, he owns me money , never cares about it .omg ...stay strong
@@delf5724 you too!!
@@lalaacosta4818 am healing slowly , but sometimes it is just hard my friend .
@Delf I definitely still have my days too...but I also know that me being happy without him will annoy him. And I can make more money and replace my things, while he needs to leech off others to get by.
@@lalaacosta4818 you are so right.. we can buy those things. His happiness with his new girlfriend is not our problem anymore 😂
Thank you for giving me insight on narcissist people
12:47 this part is 💯 true, I’ve been experiencing this w my soon to be ex. Idk if this is the right course of being cordial & nice while still pushing things along for the divorce but she definitely has made comments showing her true intentions & it’s not because she cares about me or my needs or respects me, no no. I have moved on & reached a place of gratitude but even for me this is all new waters I’m navigating.
yes, yes, yes. I know she never loved me. I know it by finally internalizing her behavior and working hard to understand her psychology. I divorced her 8 months ago. But being alone is so very painful. More painful than being with her. I still hope for her attention. I still want a nurturing relationship with her. I know it's not there, never will be. But I still long for it. This is so crazy making. My feelings and my brain are not connected. So my concern is with me. She will do fine in her limited way.....but will I?
Same here... It is really difficult to accept the truth and it is because we want to believe it was real. Accepting it was all a lie is the hardest thing ever... Devastating to our reality and understanding of humanity... The fight is accepting there is pure evil in the world. We saw it, but we loved the illusion, so it is the worst fight ever...
Been there and bought the t-shirt.
The thing you need to tell yourself daily is, you will get past this, and she isn’t living her best life, she is living in her own little Hell, which is in her head and that will never ever change.
It’s been about 6 months since I have last seen my ex- narc and I am so glad she is out of my life due to all the half truths, lies, triangulation, and cheating the whole time we were together! Sad human being.
We got this! Stay strong!!!
So sorry Brad, I know exactly, it's the same for many of us. Hang in there. Xxx
Thank you all for your kind words. I guess I loved and needed this lie. Time to claw my way back to reality. It’s a hard and sad lesson to learn in this life.
@@bradleywhitaker1085 I'm really sorry you are going through this do you best to create activity around yourself. I started with 5 push ups 5 sit ups 5 squats each day and added on each day. I'm way healthier than I've ever been after 8months of hell from my ex narc gf. She finally discarded me right before Christmas...I knew it was real. Because it was the first time in those 8months she ghosted me silently without all the drama. Some people are just immature at heart. Do your you best to press on. We love you and we all are routing for your full recovery.
So true but so hurtful. Never encountered this before. What a minefield. Still hurting from the discard.
They think differently because they had arrested development at a young age, hence why they come across emotionally immature.
And the person told me at the beginning they arent going anywhere. At devalue they did leave even though physically there. Let them get from others in the same way they did from me. Good luck.
That's why I walked on egg shells so many years!! Now I know why!! Thanks Anoushka!!
I could never understand how he just accepted it when we ended he never got upset whereas I did and he replaced me every time we broke up within a couple of days week at the most he said that was how he got over me !!! this time I don’t care,
👏 You don't need someone that doesn't treat you like a 👑 QUEEN 💖🌻
Same here, I couldn't believe how he can be over it almost immediately after discard when only day before he claimed he loved me. They are so broken and empty inside, there's simply nothing in them to love. They fake everything throughout their whole life.
@@user-bk3xs4gd1v I totally agree mine was over it within days every time we broke up he was with someone straight away, I just didn’t want to believe he was a narcissist I thought I wasn’t enough so glad to have found the support
Dang me too same thing happened to me I was like well I'm going to leave you alone then because it seems like you don't want me anymore and he just texted back "Ok" to my long heartfelt message filled with anguish and resignation. That's it!!! After all his rage fits and the sexting and intimacy and back and forth and late night long phone calls pouring our hearts out to each other about our pasts and him saying he would NEVER hurt, abandon, use, or objectify my body or waste my time and then he literally just did all that and said he decided to work things out with his ex because they just "have so much more history together and moved here to california be with her and didn't think to mention any of this to me until after he got to sleep with me and get me completely 100% emotionally invested and cut off all my other options out of respect for him because I fell for the sob story about how broken he was after his ex cheated on him!!!!! What the actual f!!!!!
And after it all he just says "ok". Ok. Ok?? OK?! JUST OK?!
NO IT'S NOT JUST "OK" YOU SADIST!!!!!!🤦FINE GO BACK TO THE GIRLFRIEND IT DIDN'T WORK OUT WITH THE FIRST GO AROUND THAT YOU MOVED HERE FOR AND USED MY TIME EMOTIONS AND BODY LIKE A GODDAMN LAYOVER FLIGHT IN BETWEEN YOUR DAMN MAKE UP BREAK UPS WITH YOUR F*CKING PRECIOUS HOLIER THAN THOU "SO MUCH MORE HISTORY AND STUFF" EX!!!!!!!
Same here
What an outstanding summary of what happens when in a relationship with a narcissist! Thank you 😊 💓
Some people won't be able to wrap their heads around this comment
Every person is simply transactional. There is no depth in the viewpoint of the Puddle. The Puddle has absolutely no emotional connection.
This can be explained
"The Looking Glass Concept'
Parallel forms of idealization going on at the same time. All Narcissistic people show their own mirror in their idealization of the other person. While mirroring the idealization in the first and 3rd phase.
In a sense that means mirroring is going in 2 different ways. The Narcissist is imitating what you love or deserve in the 1st phase. At the same time, the Narcissist is also shown a vulnerability in this phase. Which is not truly felt nor understood by the other person. Which creates the toxicity of the 3rd phase"
The other person lost before they even started this process of an illusion of a relationship.
Yes keep me in your loop vibe share it directly all in honors blessings to you!!!
My absence is felt deeply. To the core. Rattles the cage of the false self they identify with. I pray that one day they may awaken. Until then, I move on to my greater purpose. Be Blessed. Always.
It's nice that she doesn't care about me. She told me a few times I'll never get rid of her, and quite honestly that statement scare the sh....out of me.
@ᴀsᴋ ᴀɴᴏᴜsʜᴋᴀ is this you for real?
It's sad. But...I'm right. He's a narcissist and people around him are blind. He can't change because he thinks I'm the sole problem of everything when that's not really true. He was a cheater before I encountered him, but I was blinded by his facade. His relationships fall apart because he cheats all the time.
do you think i can’t live without you he said! 😪
So glad to hear this. Every other channel
Keeps saying they will “Hoover” you. I’m sure my EX is so happy to be rid of me.
Amazing explanation!❤
Is someone snoring in your video 🤔lol..Great video love you uploads❤
Feel sorry for them .now I know..so sad...very rare disorders...God Bless them🙏🙏🙏
No rare disorders 50% of populaion ate mentally ill
Transactional Is a brilliant word! 💞
What hurts most is realising she doesn’t love me and most likely never did and that I’m the only who fell in love and loved her. My narcissistic ex broke up with me then gave me the silent treatment, ignored me and ghosted and discarded me and I’ll never know why she hurt me like this and caused me all this pain and suffering. She has put me through one of the most painful experiences of my life and 3 months after the discard I am still thinking about her everyday and it is torture. I can’t even put the pain into words.
When you move forward, more than likely you’ll hear from her. Don’t answer. Don’t look back…Don’t take her back. She hasn’t changed, no matter how much she swears she has.
But you do not know of she loved you , also narcisisstic people can love - coverts with traits of FA can - to a certain degree when they have avoidant traits. I am being ghosted too 3rd time ..but this time I won't go back ..although I am hurting so much and the pain is so strong that I cannot describe it and nobody who never loved as deeply as I did love him will ever understand. I cannot understand his cruelty. He was mostly kind to me. leaving me abandoned breaks my soul He made me feel loved and safe. It nearly destroys me down to my core. I stay no contact.
The perfect test for a narcissist is give them the book How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. This book is like throwing water on a witch. They absolutely cannot stand it. It makes them foam at the mouth
They are emotional predators. Great talk. I gave one the silent treatment after every tantrum.
I’ve heard this info many times, in diff ways, from diff experts etc. but there was something incredibly comforting and reassuring about the way you conveyed it. I’m glad I found your channel. Thank you so much for learning about NPD so that you can help those of us who have endured this torment. You’ve helped me turn around my day, and I’m grateful.
My ex told me he needs a haram. He said I need 6 women and described what each women would provide! I was in shock. SMH a week later I was gone
I’ve subscribed…I only ever watch Prof Sam Vaknin….but your take is in line only simplified…thanks 👍🏼
The dog snores. 🤣
Yes they have huge barriers put up to self and others. Yes replaceable. Already have others lined up. And then devalue shows itself and they wont explain a damm thing to you. So let them wonder the details now with no contact. If they even care. They are focusing on new people as they have been. I felt mostly dumped like trash without a thought. Definitely like an object in the end. She could never tell me why she was my friend. Emotional validation. Done.
You are brilliant-thank you for helping all of us
For me it boils down to two bulletpoints:
1. It was indeed my fault: I recognized always that I was used for their needs. But I wanted to provide my skills to the comunity, the orchestras, and wanted to create my music. Therefore I swallowed always what was thrown at me and stayed far too long until I collapsed twice. I should have considered that my ideals aren´t theirs and therefore should have come to the only correct conclusion, that I lived an illusion of friendship and working together for our goals, not for selfish reasons.
2. George Orwell discribed in "Animal Farm" very vividly how society works and how it is occupied by narcissits, and how idialistic idiots like me always stay in the ideal to serve the community, but in reality just are played for the narcissitic needs.
Yes, I became quite embittered. And don´t think that this will change.
Me too
@Sandra U. So your solution is to fantasize about an imaginary friend who supports and understands you. Interesting. And you´re looking for seemingly vulnerable people to exploit them or to suck them into your delusion. I find that fairly disgusting.
@@monikaschroder2328 It's disheartening, isn't it? I have the feeling, and observed quite some time, that the social fabrique is increasingly endangered because narcissists are so very rarely stopped by the people who should have an interest in sustain the community.
I had that epiphany myself, I took responsibility for my side of things, made amends as well as possible and am moving forward.......
@@teddlyt That's the right move, I do as well. But, as you certainly know, when you gave so much for your, as others ever tell you unreachable, goals and have succeded in that, it is brutal to loose it because of constantly unfair treatment of people who only work for themselves.
So correct all the info. Well, he was always the one, breaking no contact as i have stuck to it, for a year. I still remember, i went no contact Oct 4 2021, a month later, he calls, under the blocked number on the day, i was working. And then, he stalked me at gatherings with his friends, 3 times and then silence then right after, he told his church he is upset of my birthday party. That was the last. I hope i don't hear anymore in 2023 about him. 🤞🤞🤞
A hard pill to swallow but it def resonates. Bulls eye. Really good example for transactional. Thank you
Thanks for helping me understand
very helpful video. short and sweet and right on the money. thanks.
Yes!
The narcs ego processes were not completed or misformed in early childood ie like a person in the early years where their skeleton did not form normally so the person has a life long deformity.
Thereafter their adaption to this disaster is their persona ie the NPD, the narcissistic personality disorder😕
It is all true 💯
Hurts me a lot
This brilliant & beautiful lady is magic! Such understanding....
Thank you so much, I have learned a lot from this talk.
yes love bomb in the beginning and nothing in the end!!
Yes
Nothi g whatsoever only tears my tears
Thanks for this educational message. God bless. ❤
These people are very difficult people who don't care about anyone or anything they Pretend to be a nice person. They're not really a nice person. They hate you because They can't be like you. It would be actually like be like actually be a real person then being someone who really isn't that is something these people can't take! And that one word is Responsibility!
Thank you Anoushka for this harsh truth...
Very good video , thank you Anoushka ❤
Thanks a lot for your videos your doing a great job to help people ❤
Once they don't get their way and ghost you, do NOT forgive them.
They won't change and just want to use you.
Go hard no contact, block them, get your power back and find someone real with whom you can have a loving relationship.
Life is too short to obsess over a person who objectifies you, who devalues you because they don't get their selfish needs met.
I really needed to hear this, thank you.
This is the best explanation I’ve seen so far.. it’s an objective and fair assessment of the situation.
Thanks
No depth is spot on! I’m a realist and a deep thinker , I’m always interested in learning what makes someone tick , she rarely ever asked me about me… she said she didn’t do that, because she didn’t want to seem intrusive. I believed and accepted that for 2 years, but the invalidation, lack of emotional empathy , sympathy, curiosity of me as a human being took its toll. I broke it off 3 weeks ago , I’m still trying to find a place to move , she stays gone , she will never be self reflective and see her part in why I’m leaving. It was a lesbian relationship, I’ve found in the gay community narcissistic people are rampant
I’m lucky he’s stayed no contact but he does owe me money and I have deleted his phone numbers but tbh I doubt I will get the money back it’s the only thing for him to contact me about I’m so relieved I left him
Is the money really worth it??? Amanda, if you decide you don't care about that money, you can make a clean break...AND YOU WILL FEEL SOOOO EMPOWERED!!
No amt of money is worth losing your peace of mind! 🤗
The ex narc in my life owes me money too, but if he stays away he can keep it
@@SweepDailyWin thank you and you’re right I don’t care about the money for the reason I would rather lose it than have to have contact with him it’s the 5th time we’ve broken up and this is my last I won’t let him back in again
@@twinsma14 exactly how I feel I think I meant it’s the only excuse he could use but I know him well he won’t pay it back anyway ‘
Went no contact is what I’ve done. There will just be more manipulating game playing. I don’t have time to waste time…
Very disheartening but true!
Why does the narcissist want to be friends so badly even after you told them no numerous times.
You are the best person to listen to on this subject, you are so spot on.
They don't care about losing you but they will care about what you gave them the energy they got from you depending on how much energy money or what you call Supply narcissistic Supply they got from you so missing you personally your person no but missing what you did for them yes everybody brings something unique to the table the more Supply you gave her narcissist the more likely they're going to miss that Supply the more of a giver you are the more of a loving person you are the more that, will play in their head
Woooow you are perfectly describing my wife !!!! I was so blindly in love with her for 23 years!!! And i thought the way she is, that's normal. Until she found her "male best friend that understand her"!! i have had enough and left her. I met her when she was single mother with 3 years old boy. We raised the boy he is 26 now and we had a daughter she is 18 now. So whole this time my wife was using me !!! I am so fucking stupid !!! unbelievable !!!!
Same mate , just found out my ex is covert narc , it’s a strange feeling , but f it , I’ve moved on
I don't understand yes they are terrible human beings but it's like going in circles with pretty much the same information. I put the effort in to myself instead of into the narcissist. I know why she used me and it is a gift to be kind considerate and care and love others and also things.. so she doesn't get it from me and will never again.. pretty much everyone experiences loss it does hurt when you realize what it really was but I don't treat people that way .. so it is what it is and now I'm just overwhelmed with the thought of the freedom I again have. I can't believe how the weight lifted off of me when I heard from her mouth.. it's over.. physically.. I love you all. Try to see the gift you where given.
I'm glad I joined your group. You are very good!
I love 🥰 how you explain everything like a friend 🥰 speaking to me 🥰 , you are helping me so much 🥰
Thank you
My malignant actually told me I was a liability not an asset. When I figured them out and stood up for truth he said I was a liability!! Lol! What a clown. These narcissists are delusional and literally insane. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. They repeat these abusive cycles over and over their entire lives. Insane! I went blackout no contact and healed. It’s the only way to recover your life. God bless! 🙏🙏🙏
It is so hard to recover your life, my covert made me think he loved me and yI felt safe. Now he is ghosting me butvdudt block me. I am still hurting and on no contact.😢.
Harsh BUT so true.
You say all the Right things that is so true