Suffered from ADHD my whole life, only recently diagnosed in my 40's and you are absolutely spot on! I often say "It's not that I don't want to do anything, the problem is my brain wants to do all the things at once." I feel like this is something only some one who struggles with it can really understand because to your average person they can't wrap their head around it. "Just pick something!" it's so simple for them, while I have literally wasted entire days considering what I'm "about to do".....
This resonates so much. I am also wondering if neurotypical people just lack the amount of imagination and empathy constantly pouring down on us and that we have to handle every single moment. Now, that I am so aware how different I really am, I begin to realise that 'normal' people are maybe not necessarily better a focusing but have an idea kind of now and then and they experience having that idea as something special and exciting. Wich is mind blowing in a not so good way to me. It makes socializing and connecting with others such a tussle.
It's like this comment is written by me. Luckly the older I get the more ways I find to "work around it" that help me better with picking things to do and actually get them done as well, but it definitely stays a challenge for sure.
I was first diagnosed at 37 and realized that I have spent my entire life creating good coping methods and fighting the less favourable methods - but without the bigger picture it was an unnecessarily heavy burden to maintain the bare minimum of stability to also function and advance in society. I have found peace and have started enjoying my many small traits and knowledge pools.
not alone, same here. Was just recently confirmed a few years back in 2018 while trying to reseach ADHD for my son who was diagnosed in elementary school and how it was a night and day difference for him after being properly treated and those around him knowing how severe he has ADHD. Makes sense however why I have several graduate degrees in IT in sectors so many fail at. The code and even say message traffic in a congested network just all melts away and becomes so simply for me to decode as well write code all even in my head not needing to write down . issue I have so much is with getting whats in my head out and that very few can keep up with me with coworkers calling me a "machine". LoL
Love that bit about Autonomy, it is often missed in discussions about ADHD. If something is of interest or urgency, autonomy w/ occasional checks is key to get things done. But interruption, disturbance in the environment, and being micromanaged = a slippery slope to burnout.
Yes, thats very good discription! Honestly, I was blaming myself for years for getting frustrated when somebody interrupts my hyperfocus, and it was actually due to content on the internet that I learned about the ADHD rage :D It isn't well captured in the research either (at least it wasn't a few years ago)
Absolutely, I have never heard anyone link autonomy to ADHD. It makes complete sense to me. From early childhood, I could not bear being supervised or told what to do. It took a long time for me to realize having autonomy in my job was crucial for me to do my best work and to be happy.
@@kgeo753 I'm glad the video helps! Do you mind giving me your opinion? :) Should I make a video about Autonomy in general? As a concept in psychology and as part of one of the most researched and supported theories in PSY - Self-Determination Theory? Or if it is not ADHD related it wont be that interesting?
Her description of how ADHD impacts work is spot on. I believe there are evolutionary advantages to having ADHD that don't work well in a modern economy that creates jobs that are repetitive, don't require creative problem-solving, and force people to be sedentary. The same thing with Primary education. Early diagnosis is crucial for people to get on the right path in life. It's critical for parents and teachers to be able to recognize the behavioral traits of ADHD, seek an evaluation, and if diagnosed make sure they find constructive ways to keep the child engaged. ADHD can lead people to excel in life but too often it ruins people's lives because they're never diagnosed or they're diagnosed after doing a great deal of harm to themselves.
Thank you for this comment! It's reasonable yet positive, and it adds value to the video because I'm sure others read those comments too and they also feel supported 💜
It feels like a super power in high stress, results driven, important, potentially crisis situations. That's where we seem to be good. And those situations very rarely crop up these days. They absolutely would have done 1000s of years ago though.
If that was the case we would be having much more trouble than we do at the moment. There are lots of jobs that are not repetitive, require travel and creative problem solving and those are the types of jobs that people with ADHD thrive in. Examples are the Gig work like stage hands at a theatre, any jobs that require freelancing. Engineering and Coding as well as landscaping all require you to find a middle ground between the environment and your clients needs. If anything modern day is the best time to have ADHD in since we have A. the relevant medication for ADHD, and B. the capacity to support far more jobs that are ADHD friendly. 100 years ago where there was still lots of factory wark for sure was not more ADHD friendly than today. As a person with ADHD, yes it poses challenges, but we also have chances, and when you understand your strengths and weaknesses you can lead a lifestyle that suits yourself. Even if you have to switch your job every few years. (an advantage in some areas.)
The medical field is a great area to work in if you have ADHD. I'm an X-Ray Technologist and about half my department has diagnosed ADHD! It stays interesting because we do different procedures on different ages and types of people, you can go on to learn different imaging modalities (and some, like CT, you can sometimes learn on the job) and you can find the shift and days that work for you. I like midnights because I am working by myself so I get to run the show how I like and I don't have the constant interruptions of the phone ringing like day shift has. If you work in a hospital, you never know what is going to come in the ER, and when the sh!t hits the fan, our hyperfocus abilities are AMAZING! You will also find that many of your peers in different departments also have ADHD: ER doctors, surgeons, nurses, respiratory techs, lab techs, security, and the EMT's and paramedics that bring some of the patients in that you will be imaging. It's a great field, but yes, a micromanager boss will absolutely RUIN it!
My husband was diagnosed with Inattentive ADD.....unfortunately not until he was 58 years old and our marriage was over. I wish he had been diagnosed as a child as it would have saved him many, many years of confusion, depression to the point of almost ending his life. He had many failed relationships and he couldn't understand why. He is now on medication and sees a therapist every two weeks. He is becoming who he says he was meant to be without all the 'chatter' in his head. He said that he always felt as if he was walking under three feet of water. I pray for everyone to get diagnosed early and then can understand why they think and react the way they do. It's not a wrong thing, just different. We are in the process of a divorce as 19 years of feeling gaslit has taken its toll on me. But I love him and only want the best for him. I'm just so happy that ge finally has answers.
I love your caring and understanding approach ✨ And yes, early diagnosis can help a lot (although we also risk over-diagnosing recently as our modern way of living can resemble adhd quite well, but one is a matter of bad habits and can be fixed relatively easily , the other is neurological difference that you eventually learn to cope with but you can’t re-wire yourself). I hope your husband continues to find his true self 🤗
I hate dating with ADHD. I'm terrible at keeping up with texts, let alone initiating text conversations and sometimes I even forget to reply after I'm finished with something else I had to focus on and then the other person eventually either feels I'm not interested enough or they get really resentful towards me.
This is why you can do anything you don't need to do but can't do anything you need to. Learnt that on my last deep dive, and observing myself of course.
spot on.. I am in lower cycle right now but I know it is also possible to get out of it. Over the years I HAVE gained massive wins. It takes self forgiveness and an amount of discipline most people do not have to deal with If your in a rut (like I am right now lol!) its important to remember to not put any blame/shame/guilt upon yourself. Remind yourself of your past winnings, of your moments of gratitude.
Hands down! and recommended it to my therapist to show all including the parents and teachers of children. Thanks so much @EvieRan! Keep the content flowing, loving every bit of it!
i bought a notebook for this yesterday.. and a very nice pen. but before i got the chance to write anything i already forgot it and left it somewhere 😂
I came up with so many ideas that other people made happen including Uber, Amazon lockers(delivery while you are out to a local business running a side franchise) , ebay (my idea was for vehicles only though), . I should be wealthy but I didn't have the motivation to try to implement them and thought I must be missing something obvious therefore it wouldn't work. I did share these ideas with family at the time but nobody took much notice. Then years later I'm shouting "I came up with that years ago!" to which the response was always "yeah but you were too lazy to do it."
I use Google docs app and a offline note app. I also use voice recording. As soon as I get the idea I put it down, idc what I'm doing. But also if you are in a meeting or something that requires you to pay attention. Pay attention😮. Because if you allow yourself to day dream you'll think of something new. Just distract yourself. or fake writing notes. If you are in the shower, keep your phone near to use if a good idea comes to mind
Yes! And somehow you know that you have to act quickly, otherwise someone else will run with the idea. But it is impossible to keep up with the ideas, even writing them down, because whole concepts flow into your mind on your commute home, when you cannot write it down. Names for websites, slogans etc. And then, when you artive home, its all gone… so many ideas, it is exhausting
Autonomy is SO important to me. Didn’t realize it was tied to ADHD. Also the thing about forgetting something that will pop in my brain. Oh yes! Always.
I don't think I've ever encountered an ADHD video that would so precisely describe my struggles and lay out the reasons in such a concise and logical way, so thank you very much. This information is sure to help a lot of us ❤
I’m so glad to read the encouraging and heartwarming comments here 💜 I always try to help but now I’m even more motivated to try and provide useful content. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and supporting me 😊✨
I didn't get diagnosed till I was 33 wish it had happened alot sooner. But I'm an Arborist(professional tree climber) and it works great with my ADHD. The work is very mentally and physically demanding and the heights and danger keep me so fully engaged that my mind doesn't wander at all when I'm climbing! I love it! I just have to be careful not to hyper focus and stay organized up there.
ADHD empathic w OCD (& CPSTD/PTSD) I have been homebound since a year b4 COVID…and idk how to get “back out there”. Cannot believe this is now my reality; I was always on the go, but I was “masking” and really don’t know who I am, all these years later. 🕊️
I was told more than once. My problem was, I was from a "Broken home". I have ADHD. I found being a Surgical Tech a great job. I still failed at the people stuff. Thank you.
@@averagestudent4358 I'm sure they could explain better, but it's the people that assist the surgeon during surgery. They do all sorts of stuff from prepping and sterilizing the surgical equipment, to handing the instruments to the surgeon, getting that medical draping set up over/around the patient's area to be operated on, making sure everything works right prior to surgery, etc. Basically, they do a huge variety of things to make sure that the surgeon can focus on the surgery and not the myriad of details. In general, surgery techs help make surgery safer and more efficient!
Doing surgery on robots. Just kidding, they either A. help the doctors and nurses while they're doing surgery, or be repair surgical equipment. I believe the former is what he's doing. @@averagestudent4358
You are the first person who made me feel as though my brain is a good brain…. Now I sound like Frankenstein but seriously you point out positive aspects rather than making me feel as though there’s something wrong with me. I’ve always considered myself perceptive. Thank you
I don’t know what’s good or bad, but that’s exactly my point: this is arbitrary and if we have lived in a different environment, with different societal norms, maybe ADHD wouldn’t have been considered “disorder” but just “different”. I don’t know but self-blame; self-criticism and feeling “weird” surely don’t help, so I prefer to think about alternatives perspectives :) also, check the comments, somewhere I mentioned that my point isn’t to accommodate or dismiss the issues either. I’m just trying to find some balance 💜
Of course your ADHD is positive, its just the way it works. The only reason why its preceived negative is because we don't fit in our current worlds norms. for example 9-5 will rarely go well for an neurodivergent person.
I'm nearly 54, without diagnosis. I can identify alot of traits and was asked by a work coleague who trained as Primary School Teacher, if i had ever been diagnoses. She said I was classic ADD/ADHD. That makes a huge difference from my experince of teachers from when i was in school, being stood at top of the class and being told that I was stupid ( maybe they thought I was lazy as I was always good at math). The biggest problems i've had are with RSD and Imposter Syndrome, which i would never have though were assiciated with ADHD. I honestly though there was something mentally wrong with me. Most days I would have an issue with someone, even my wife and friends. Now I know its a thing, i can work through 'talk myself down' from episodes... eventually. I still have problems with Imposter Syndrome and it causes a lot of stress. Something to work on!
what helps with the imposter syndrom is to realize the "others" dont do anything better. we all know our own weaknesses and hide them to the outside. as a result we dont see them as easy in others but be aware on our own. that creates the wrong perception. but really the average person would be medicore by any standards in anything they do. yea shure you might not be as great as you want to be but usually its 100 times better than top quater
Sending good wishes and support in your journey to understand your brain. I am a mid-50's female. Began stimulant meds 2 months ago. No regrets. After a life of adding this and that habit, to improve outcomes of daily living, thriving was still out of reach. The realization that I was out of tools to behaviorally modify my life to the baseline success of neuro typicals landed hard. Like you, I asked a friend who had some knowledge in neurodevelopment. She helped me understand how ADHD presents differently for the genders and how the medicine works, if my doctor and I chose that route.
Can you please do a video more directed at those with the inattentive type of ADHD specifically? I don’t have the hyperactive type and feel ignored because I am lumped together with the hyperactive energy types. Therefore having a career like a chef would be a complete disaster for me because I really don’t have the energy for that. In fact, that is my main struggle my complete burnout all the time. I have the hyperfocus you describe and also boredom in careers because the extroverts do the exciting architect part and then pass on the execution part to an introvert like myself. I struggle with being tidy and time management as well. Thank you.
You are not alone ! Sometimes I just have to stop and spend time to clean up, put things away...I took an evening class on automotive work, and 15 min before end of class, the instructor would yell out - 15 min ! 15 min. Meaning it was time to clean up. I never used to do that, work till I could work no more at that time, and leave stuff all about. So I try to incorporate a 5-15 min clean, return, organize time when done working in my own garage.
@@DanTheManIOM Maybe I should try that. I see lots of detail and go down a rabbit hole of thoughts and ideas. Perhaps having a timer on for 15 mins would force me to do something without thinking. Actually, I have tried this and it does work. It needs the discipline to convert the process to habit. I read somewhere that it takes about 40 days to form a habit.
Could you go freelance/self employed or something. Personally, I’m a bit RSD and struggle to work for people so putting all my eggs in one basket in a bit and going self-employed which involves a passion I’ve had for years. All the best.
@@Groundwater24 Yes, I am going to have to. Employers just don’t get the fact that I can’t sit in a meeting for an hour, listen and absorb. I drift off and then they can’t understand why everyone else knows something from the meeting and I don’t. I got managed out of a job because although I could execute everything well and on time, I was hopeless at the soft skills. I have retrained and got a science degree, (which in itself was hard because revision is a nonsense when you cannot commit things to memory - another ADHD issue), and am going into private online teaching. At least I will understand the struggles of the shy, introvert kids who are bright. May I ask what your passion is?
I was diagnosed with ADHD since my teenage, spent my whole life fighting ADHD. Also suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.
Congrats on your recovery. Most persons never realizes psilocybin can be used as a miracle medication to save lives. Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death bud, lets be honest here.
Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Germany. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them
YES very sure of Dr.benfungi. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
100% agree I used to have Psychosis and paranoid thoughts like "people thinking about me talking about me etc. Very odd behavior after getting off Adderall from 7-16. Antidepressants at 18-29. 31 now. I took way to much, but took about 20g of Gold caps (Psilocybin containing mushroom) I analyzed my entire life. The emotions that came out helped me understand behavior etc more. Wont ever need to do it again because I'm happy and contempt forever, but I wish more people did this to alter their perception of reality. Would help with healing much trauma
So my son was diagnosed with ADHD after his school teachers began noticing inattention in him. As I started understanding more about what was going on with him. I saw my own childhood story unfolding with him. As I am just now realising the things that made me believe I was unique or different, not in a necessarily negative way, are down to probably having similar issues. Watching this video was also like someone telling my story. I’m going to share this with my son. Thank you! Very very insightful
I'm glad this video resonated with you and your son's experiences. It's quite common for ADHD to run in families, suggesting a strong genetic component. Many adults only recognize their own ADHD symptoms after their children are diagnosed. Sharing this understanding can be a powerful way to connect and support each other. Keep exploring and learning together - it can make a big difference! 💜
@@semaph0re no we have not even had any discussions about medicating our child with any health care practitioners. Everything we have done with him are around awareness, for himself, and his teachers. We are working with him to help him identify unhelpful patterns and applying strategies that encourage him and build on his strengths. Thank you for your concern.
Wow. A summary of my life (74 yo) in 12 minutes including the idea of Bipolar vs ADHD. I saw it when I was first diagnosed with Bipolar after difficulties at work in my Forties. Thank-you
I laughed out loud when you said emergency services to software developers for the types of jobs. I think I think I have ADHD and I wanted to be a paramedic, but now I'm a software developer. I always thought it was an odd transition, but it makes total sense now. I think I would've enjoyed either job.
This is why things work with my husband. He's asd, I'm adhd. We like our "structured play time" together, but are also very comfortable doing our own thing. For me, when I'm struggling, I very much feel like Alice falling down the rabbit hole - I can't grab anything on the sides to stop me falling, and I can't even see anything clear enough to know what to grab onto. As for work, even though I have my Master's in International Relations, I preferred to take jobs managing businesses that I care nothing about, and spending my time reading books and studies I find important. I'm far more an "editor" than "creator". Building from the ground up is very overwhelming for me. Time alone is extremely important to me.
Alice in Wonderland is one of my favorite 'kids' books (I dont think it's really meant for kids :D ) - because yes.. I definitely relate to your anology :) I like what you are saying about the work - not being married to it, use it to provide, and then do your own thing. I actually think that this is pretty healthy and allows for better work-life balance.
This is me. I've never heard it expressed so clearly and accurately for literally everything I experience. It was suggested once some years ago that I might have ADHD, but I never really pursued it. At the time it was thought that I was depressed, but that medication did more harm than good. I've more or less moved myself into a spot where I get dopamine from cycling, and I had to let go of my design career as, even though I created amazing things when left to my own devices, the other aspects of the job were sometimes too overwhelming. I'm a little bored at work now, to be honest, but the QoL is good. Cycling and gaming keep me balanced and engaged, recharging me outside of work. I have a hard time finishing my personal projects though. I should probably look into ADHD again, although I prefer no medication. You're the first person I ever (virtually) met that hit the nail on the head for literally everything I experience.
It's crazy how identified I felt with this video. I feel like my level of dopamine is really low, this makes me quite talented at my work (the standard I set for myself is way higher than that of my peers), but also makes me feel soooooo freaking bored at times. Thank you for your video, subscribed.
Yes, the boredom is just ... ah, such a typical issue. Sometimes, I still guilt-trip myself about it. I wish I could stay engaged with the same thing for longer.. but at least it makes us better at more complex issues that would push some other people away :)
Thank you, I’ve absorbed a lot but this is the first time I can understand subtle features of my work and relationship problems. I was a design engineer in government with lots of autonomy but also often with no one really interested in my outputs.
Thank you for this. I was fired after 4.5 days from a job in a company that was so chaotic I managed to not only work out the pieces but got the disengaged re-engaged but also called out where the challenges were and presented it in a way that it came across threatening. Thanks again for this, I have to rewatch this a few times to see how I can not fall into this mess again.
Thank you for this video. I’m glad I’m living in a time where ADHD is more understood, but it’s still hard when not everyone understands what it’s like. 😢
Spot on with the little highlights on kinds of careers that suit ADHD in terms of the creativity, autonomy, and busywork. I am autistic and ADHD and I have a degree in emergency management but I felt the rigidity of the rules of an emergency management agency was too exhausting and now I work at a company that recycles and upcycles electronics to reduce e-waste and landfill poisoning and I am the only person in my department so I only answer to one person and am free to dictate my entire workflow as long as productivity remains.
Thank you so much for the clearest and most encouraging explanation of what it's like to have ADHD. It can indeed be a super power under the right conditions. For me, focus on regular meals with heathy foods plus adequate exercise are key to managing it.
At 40 I was diagnosed with ADHD and I never understood why I would day dream, or just fiddle around with a task. But other times I would be so into it and get upset when interrupted. I knew I could hyper focus, I just didn’t know it was a thing. Also helps explain my issues with substances.
The last few years of my job as a computer software user support person were the most rewarding. Now the experience is a gift I observe once in a while with internal pride. It was something I could focus on one problem at a time. I really hope this for all of those with ADHD or have some disregulation or “rejection” problems.
I was never 100% sure whether i have ADHD or not but this pretty much wraps it up for me. Thank you! Now more of us can work easier towards our goals and dreams. :)
This is the second video that impressed me with its clarity, wealth of information and compactness. If I hadn't had to discover all the things that are said here for myself by reading and trying them out, I probably could have saved a few years. Respect for your clear messages and examples.
I resonated so much with this video that I cried. I am in my early 40’s and am going to the doctor finally for a diagnosis in a few weeks. Set up an appointment today. ❤ thank you for the video
Thanks so much for making this video. You are the first person I have heard talk about how those of us with ADHD have the ability to hyperfocus. Everyone else is always talking about how we are easily distracted. I am a Fine Art Painter. It is my ADHD that enables me to be good at it. So, I prefer to think that I have an ability rather than a "disorder." Calling this a "disorder" is like saying really smart people have a "Genius Disorder" or really tall people have a "Height Disorder." It is my suspicion that the reason we are labeled as having a "disorder" is because medication can be prescribed for disorders and disorders can be treated by psychiatrists both of which make money for somebody. It seems to always be about the money, doesn't it? So, I have a proposal. . .lets stop calling this a "disorder" and change the name from ADHD to HICA to stand for "Highly Innovative Creative Ability." Just because we don't fit into someone else's pigeon hole, doesn't mean we have a disorder. Thanks again for your video. Let's keep focusing on the positive aspects of this amazing gift.
"because medication can be prescribed for disorders" - In the US, it's a business. I won't get tired of saying that a healed patient is a lost client. I do know that some people have more severe symptoms and that medication helps them tremendously, but there are also some other people who could benefit from learning some tools; befriending their brain; and receiving more acceptance and support vs 'just take that pill'. Actually, everybody could benefit from that.. I dont want to say it is only positive either because I want to respect how much some people struggle with it. But I also want to focus on WHY they struggle - is it because their adhd brain is all that bad or it is because they have been told that they have a disorder that they cant control without pills? How much of this suffering is because of the biology, and how much of it is because of our society. Asking kids to sit down for 8h and go home to do some more focused work - how is this healthy?! .. Ah, yeah, it's complex but I am here to provide more positive outlook and support and tools as much as I can ✨ Thank you for leaving me the comment, it helps so much! I feel so grateful for the opportunity to connect with similar people 💜
Can I ask you if it was hard coming to that feeling? I’m currently struggling A LOT in college and despite trying to work WITH it, adapting my lifestyle around functioning and mental space, I still feel like it’s still for sure a disorder. It’s a lack of order, and though there are positives, I find it hard to compare it to an ability? Like how the world is not built around physical disability, and that’s why it’s as debilitating as it is, but it wouldn’t change the fact that it’s an impairment. You lack a leg, regardless of how well you’re living with it, that’s still a disability.
It is a disorder of EXECUTIVE FUNCTION, though and for some, it legitimately destroyed their lives, also with addiction issues and more. Low dopamine etc. is no joke and it is a SPECTRUM T-T Some can make it work, some can't. I for my part crashed and burned after decades of no appropriate support, achievements and without medication. So there is that. Sorry, but I'm not vibing with positivity if ADHD destroyed my whole family, took some of my family members eary (for Dr. Barkley also) and all that stuff. But great if others can make it work.But just because it has some positives, doesn't mean it's a gift. It's more akin to a curse.
@Chizuru94 🫂 i am here with you...i am a late diagnosis (54 F) ...things could have been so much different had we known. The best i can do is talk to my daughters so they can make changes in their lives( they are adults now)
This video has succinctly summarized in less than 10 minutes what I have been going through my entire life. I'm in my 40's and have not been formerly diagnosed yet, but I am putting everything in place that I can to combat low dopamine. Thanks so much for this video!
You're expressing this so well, it's astonishing! I'm also studying psychology and have ADHD, and I can see how your knowledge and personal experience combined together really shine. I really think personal experience combined with knowledge make all the difference--so we can get to the heart of something, in this case ADHD. Keep up the good work!
Thank you!! And yes, I completely agree with you about combining knowledge with experience. If you only read - everything is so abstract and foreign. If you only experience - everything is so confusing and weird. The combination helps :)
Diagnosed at 47 because I got burned out and spent 5 years with the 'black dog'. It's validating hearing you speak about some of the challenges as you speak to some of my experiences. I used to think that I was simply broken, and kind of was, because of all the silly mistakes I used to make and that I didn't trust previous experiences in order to build confidence. Now that I'm medicated, I my confidence is building AND I'm slowly being able to remind myself of my previous experiences. I'm almost certain i got bogged down with this, in part, because I couldn't imagine a world where i could let go of people pleasing; i couldn't imagine myself ever being free of those silly mistakes. My diagnosis and medication have given me a brand new and ever improving life. There are still challenges, new and existing but it feels achievable now. Thanks for speaking up and sharing your wisdom 🙏.
Wow hit the nail on the head. Great video! Especially the part about Bi-polar. They always tried to say I was Bi-polar but I knew I wasn’t, only confirmed more to me that I know now in my 40s I have ADHD.
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.sporessss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
I’m 44; struggled MDD and GAD for the last 10-12 years, and found some really impressive relief with modafanil. It’s only very recently, with my teenage daughter (and my brother) being diagnosed with ADD that I’ve started to realize I also have it. Everything you’ve said here is absolutely spot on; I can’t believe it’s taken me so long to notice it. I’m booked for an assessment next week…
Work autonomy is EXTREMELY important to me, and since becoming a supervisor it's been baffling to realize how many people require or desire much more oversight. I've only just been diagnosed as having ADHD at 33 after years of wondering and having transient psychiatry specialists try to help me seek a differential diagnosis (my psychiatrist suspects potential autism as well but isn't well versed in diagnosing autism so we're just focusing on ADHD, anxiety and depression for now 😂). I'm dealing with having a lot of weird, bizarre expectations at my job that has led to burnout (I'm expected to be an event planner for ~80 people...this has nothing to do with my actual job, it's completely separate and I'm not properly supported in any of it)
Also I just got to the bipolar misdiagnosis part, and that's EXACTLY what happened to me! I was even put on antipsychotics because I told them about my brain racing constantly and making almost audible conversations at me. I've been diagnosed with a whole slew of things that never seemed to fit and that later psychiatrists would roll their eyes at before putting a different, still ill-fitting label on
I should clarify that bipolar is when the mood swings are over longer periods of time. In this video, I should've said bordeline personality disorder given that I was talking about daily switches. The timeframe is extremely important factor here, when other symptoms can be so similar.
Getting familiar with the neuroscience research has really changed my life for the better! I stopped feeling bad about myself, once I started understanding no neurotype is bad! We are just different. ❤ P.S. I don’t have ADHD, but autism and bipolar disorder, but I have close family members with ADHD. This helps me understand them and there’s also information that has helped them understand me. I have a lot of hope, because of your work and the work of others in the field of psychology. I used to distrust mental health systems, but they are becoming more and more scientifically-based and helpful. I’m even studying in a graduate Psychology program now…something I never saw myself doing! Glad I found your channel. New Sub!
These videos has saved me in so many ways as I never knew why I am as I am, as no one has ever thought of me as having ADD or ADHD although I fit on almost all the videos I watch about it. It has helped me so much to understand myself and get the most out of the brain I have. Thanks 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
What an excellent video ! I know I have adhd. I was given medication as a kid but hated it because of the stigma. Somewhere in high school, I dropped off and in college the doctor's thought i had bi polar because i went through a drug(weed) and stress induced psychosis. But that diagnosis never sat with me. This makes so much more sense. The relationship aspects and emotions being sensative to criticism and always needing to do something together the fomo and soooo many ideas i grt lost in myself. Ive started writing them down more now its helping for sure.
Ah, you've had a lot to deal with for sure! ;/ And indeed, bipolar disorder can actually be mistaken for ADHD and vice versa, if the scale of the events and the timeframes are not taken into account. I'm glad to hear that you found ways to feel better. And yeah, we [as a society] have a mental crisis but the good thing about it is that more and more people are talking about their symptoms and sharing their experiences. One of the worst things about brain disorders is that u get convinced that u are not okay, u are weird, u are weak etc, but then u start hearing others and u understand that blaming yourself for your brain disorder is like blaming yourself for your heart disorder - sometimes u can affect it, but not always, and not entirely.
Makes it sound far better than it is living with it. Teachers and institutions had crushed me due to time, deadlines, and strict regulations. Creativity is not... really easy to articulate within an organization. I learn crazy fast, good at many things, but really... the bad far outweighs the good. Meds help tons, but the feeling of detachment from the present after crunching repetition to pay the bills turns really ... unbearable. Living steady or dying? I prefer dying. I quitted again. I have had plenty of chances to just live by and get enough to eat and relax... but the emotionality really breaks my ... it is worse than physical pain often, so I've caused myself physical pain to cope. I am so glad I am ... "super". oh, and having lots of friends also is wonderful... Some has it better, no doubt. I chose Philosophy and later arts... what a turd. Can you draw all day same stuff for animation? Good stuff. Creativity? Not much really, just sit down and do your reps... that's the problem. No matter if you are the best of the bunch... no reps? No job. Ah... in all fairness, I lasted a decade without meds and got diagnosed recently. I guess it would be better later... but without meds this is insane. A curse... for sure.
I know some people have it worse but I am also tired of people being judged and discouraged for having a little bit different brain. We live in a non-adhd society, that’s mostly the problem. I’m so sad reading this (adhd, sensitivity, u know the drill). Lets have a chat? Contact me through the email. Yes, a free chat, I coach but I don’t mean « hire me », I mean « lets just have a friendly chat ». I cant ignore your message, u know
I feel for u & wish I could give u some peace. I'm nearly 60, undiagnosed w no doubt that this is me. I have a son , 26 now who is/was ADHD, ODD & a bit OCD so started meetings to learn. Surprise! I'm ADHD too! Mind blown but it makes sense. I can follow all u wrote & where u went w ease cuz ur moving at my speed but I can also feel that underlying frantic pace u live at. I wish I could turn it back a cpl knotches for u.....so u could enjoy more....I truly hope u find relief & peace & happiness. I hope one day u can stop....sit........& have a glass of tea. God bless u my friend I truly admire u
I really relate to what you've said. Twice now, after being hired to work for some random corporation that I couldn't care less about and doing mind-numbing, soul-crushing work day in and day out, I decided that it's not worth it to waste my time and energy helping the rich get richer while I get paid just enough to cover my bills. luckily I'm in a spot where I can afford to live off of savings for a little bit and just try my best to channel my energy into creative pursuits, but it's anxiety-inducing because I have no idea if it will ever pay off. Unfortunately for me, quitting jobs also means I can't afford meds though so I'm just free balling it at this point. I somehow managed to get through my first semester back in uni without flunking everything though so I just hope that I can keep that up, but only time will tell XD Thanks for your comment, you are not alone in your struggles and best of luck!
I'm 35 and just getting going on my ADHD journey. Your words couldn't be any more true!!! I have my own business where I make a significant amount less than pretty much any job I could go get, however the absolute freedom is priceless.
May I ask you what you do? I just moved to working in a kitchen preparing food and I absolutely love it! Very simple and repetitive but the team is lovely and no one breathing down your neck!!
Same here my friend. Been self employed for 13 years, I have good years and bad years. I could make more money by working much much longer hours at a 9-5 but I wouldn’t trade my freedom for that.
@@williamswayuk I'm a mechanic for motorcycles and scooters. It's such a random thing to latch onto but I LOVE it. Everyone is different but I absolutely cannot do repeating jobs, I can hardly stand doing the same thing two days in a row. What I do requires me to figure out how to fix new things almost daily, keeps me mentally very sharp. I genuinely get to help people every day.
@@brkbtjunkie the freedom cannot be overlooked. I'm lucky enough to have started my business with my best friend who also it's ADHD. We work hard but talk about life every single day. Can adjust hours however we like, take off any holiday we like, ask each other for time off (when possible). It's really shown me #1 it's a lot easier to start your own business than most people tell you and #2 the freedom absolutely is priceless, and I'll never get a 'normal' job again!
@@williamswayuk this is a me thing so don't think I'm telling you how to live, but for me the defining quality in a job is creation. I can't do jobs that don't actually physically do or create something. Jobs like straight up customer service, or anything like that would drive me absolutely mad. My mind was built to fix things.
This is the best ADHD video I have ever seen and I’ve watched A LOT! I was late diagnosed at age 52 but everything you said in this video is absolutely spot on. I’m sending this to everyone!
Thank you for this video! ADHD how it affects relationships is often overlooked in terms of content but this blew my mind! My wife loves watching TV series which has causes some arguments in the past because I often get bored I cant sit still for a 1 hour episode or I begin overanalyising the plot of the show etc because I am lacking in stimulation! I never really thought how my nurodivergence played into something like this!
I'm so grateful for you! I just found this, what you shared and explained was so incredibly on point with my existence and the obstacles I have internally and with others. You touched on several things in my life with my spouse and my work that were clarifying. I cried with a spectrum of sad and joyful feelings and am excited to share this with my spouse, I feel it will help signifantly. I'm an Entertainer - Performing Artist & Speaker - Magician / Musician / Guy Who Talks Mille Grazie Evie!!
Thank you so much for helping so many people with ADHD. My son was diagnosed at the age of 28. This is helping me, my wife, and my son so much . Keep on with your great work 👍 xx
This is extremely helpful and relatable. I can tell you are also like this because you speak about it so accurately. I’ll watch other videos you have done on the subject.
Hey Evie, at a really low point in my life and even though I know why and what do as you know it’s about the delay in doing that’s the issue. Your eloquent words have just helped me find the centre point again, keep up the amazing work thx x
Astoundingly high quality content. I really appreciated the talk about relationships, I feel like my partner and I definitely struggle with this as a couple where both parties have ADHD.
Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. We just have more of them, and that goes both ways. It's just that we, and people around us, often focus on the negative aspects because they can be so detrimental to our lives. One of my superpowers is the extremely cinematic dreams my brain presents to me very often. I write the good ones down and I'm slowly filling up a big format notebook with ideas for movies, video games, comics and everything else besides poems and other tidbits.
You’ve really hit the nail on the head here. I spent years working in a very traditional corporate structure where my autonomy was always limited. The company was only focused on profit and not providing quality to the clients. I reported to a manager with no higher education and about 50 less IQ points than I. No matter how much I tried to fit the mold I was utterly miserable. I got sick of dealing with someone who didn’t even understand the job I was doing or how to evaluate anyone on their performance in it. When I finally started my own company in the same field, even though I was technically doing essentially the same job as before, I was so much happier because I could actually do it properly without constantly being impeded by an absolute moron. My clients are much happier too, since I’m able to use that hyper-focus to their advantage, consistently delivering higher quality advice and work products.
I soooo much relate to that. Just reading your first paragraph makes me irritated with the idea of working at this position :D Deciding to quit and do your own thing wasn't easy, I'm sure, but I'm so glad to hear that it worked out! And yes, people with ADHD have focus, and quite amazing focus actually, but they have difficulties controlling it. Being in charge and sensing autonomy definitely helps, and then you can use your qualities as strengths :)
The work autonomy point is a really interesting one and not something I'd considered about my own career. I think I've likely stumbled my way into building a niche for myself with a nearly ideal balance of autonomy and challenge. There are other aspects such as relentless on-call and after hours work that make me miserable but this video is making me more strongly consider trying harder to fix those problems rather than simply moving on. I am unlikely to have this level of autonomy elsewhere as it is based on the buildup of trust over many years.
I work in the medical field, and this information is spot on. I can't tell you how much learning to take criticism as a good thing instead of personal can really help, as well as learning ways to stay focused and task oriented. I have a position that allows me to work my own schedule and work at my own pace. Others might think this would lead to slacking off, but I often do a very high work load in a short period of time, many times I get into the zone and can output a lot of productivity. I am glad I have a job that allows me this autonomy, I would advise others to try and find this.
I’ve been diagnosed with ASD but I felt like you just described me. I know there is a lot of overlap but maybe I have ADHD as well. I keep a thick project book where each page is an idea with a list of steps needed to complete it. I date when I have the idea and date when it is completed. It has helped massively to clear my brain of swirling ideas and I don’t pressure myself to complete everything.
OMG your idea sounds so mentally satisfying just reading it! I don't know if I could get around to organize such a thing for myself but it sounds so helpful. As far as ASD goes, I read a lot about in the comments here. It's a common struggle to have them both unfortunately
I have ADHD and a very severe case of dysgraphia. Unfortunately taking notes is not a strong suit of people with disgraphia as it causes a significant amount of anxiety which when combined with the ADHD is very very difficult to manage. I practically rely on my phone to record most of the stuff. I use the calendar heavily as well as the notes app (Android) because it allows me to make bullet points in order for me to break down larger projects into more bite size pieces in order that I don't try to do the whole thing at the same time and not accomplish anything. Just wanted to kind of drop that as a pro tip from an old ADHD.
As someone who has never been diagnosed but all signs point towards Inattentive & Hyper-Focused types od ADHD, this video makes me feel a lot better and helps me realise how much my career as a software engineer has been boosted by my ability to maintain a wide surface level thought process and also have those narrow sessions of focus. The only problem is, at 24 years old, I still don't know how to choose which one I experience at any one time :)
Thank you so much for making this video, I got so much useful information from listening to you that I feel inspired to make positive changes to my life. (Again) lol. Note taking for example, I haven’t taken notes for a long time that I’d forgotten how useful it is.
In reflecting over the jobs in which I have excelled during the last four decades, as well as those from which I was fired within a week of starting, I understand this video to be the best advice I ever had. I am grateful for your sharing your ideas. You have opened my mind to understanding my ADD and how it might affect my relationships with others and how I must balance my creativity with making progress toward tangible goals, with regard to my work.
What you say about work is as perfect as I've ever heard it described. Challenges, innovation, autonomy. I'm ADHD diagnosed. I find most people to be a bit boring. Low dopamine? What I know is that when I did a psychological inventory 20 years ago I kept downplaying "I often feel ecstatic," "I think the world is absolutely amazing." I was worried they'd think I was bipolar. I wasn't always happy all the time. As a child everything seemed hard, I always seemed to be in trouble. At one point I decided that I had a passion and I wasn't going to let anyone crush it. As a child I was always curious, take things apart, not be able to put them back together, get yelled at. One day I fixed my sister's bicycle. I still got yelled at. But I realized, the bike works -- that means I'm right. First layer of armor. If it works, if it's better -- I don't care what anyone says. Sure I have frustrations. Physical. Too many people don't seem to do much physical activity. Every academic and intellectual success I've had goes right back to that bicycle and learning carpentry. Real physical world. Bureaucrats can sit around and decide what's best. Ridiculous. The only and best test is: does it work? Framing houses I learned to break things down into steps, make them efficient and make sure it's practical. Mental: Few things engage me as much as a new idea. But I do have a constant need to do what I call (incorrectly) "burning off extra neurons". The ADHD ambient music videos, listening to any audiobook while I drive, sail my boat, do regular chores, food shopping. It's not multitasking. Once I'm in the zone hyperfocusing that's all I need. Mihaly Chiksentmihaly calls it 'Flow.' Being too creative. What this really is is not having enough knowledge, experience, practice to come up with ideas that will actually work. This is why I can never learn enough about everything. Six years ago I bought a sewing machine because I wanted to understand how that works. Three years ago I became a sailor. Earlier this year I sailed as one of a four person crew from Vietnam to Canada. What I find to be most powerful is synergy- applying solutions from different fields. Photographers and movie crews used to do a similar task completely differently, applying one to the other gave me an advantage. As a teacher I built science equipment using techniques I learned making furniture, construction, plumbing. Graphic design; made better lessons. I could never do all the BS grade entry stuff in the stupid forms they made us fill out. I was always last, I was always made to do it again. So I made a database. Designed it to actually work. Then I had pages laid out like the school forms. They flat out refused to accept them. But now I just had to copy over to the dumb form. And I had better records than the school district. And now I was first handing in my grades. (One would think they'd notice...) Great video. Journal writing. Yes! It may take you five years of writing entries that if your younger sister finds them she will embarrass the pants off you. But after 5 years, you will be writing entries that if you read later enhances your memory of an experience. You become one of your favorite writers. Also by getting the idea down and clear (as I'm doing here as much for practice, procrastination as for hopefully helping and encourage a fellow ADHDer) you learn how to complete a thought,. You learn and practice how to catch yourself jumping subjects. You also learn how to have a more complex, nuanced and valuable idea. Incredibly powerful tool. One difficult year of teaching I wrote over 1.5 million words. I learned a lot, kept my head straight. One problem with developing writing, other people will seem to think even slower than before. Meh. So write an amazing novel. I take a lot of notes. Started doing this in college. My hands were busy, my brain was busy translating what I was seeing and hearing into writing. Once I lost a notebook, still did good on the exam. Maybe I don't need to take notes? Did bad on the test. Lesson learned? Take the notes, always take the notes even if you never look at them again. That processing as you're writing the notes is very powerful. Autonomy. Do what's required, but do it the way it works, do more. It's a Venn diagram. Our bubble includes the boring bubble. As a teacher we were supposed to do X, we were also supposed to use the 'new initiative' which was always complete nonsense. The ADHD method is to do X, satisfy the nonsense, giving it some credibility, but make sure my lessons were effective and interesting. Autonomy doesn't mean we ignore the boss, it means we do all that in such a way it doesn't interfere with us doing it the better way we choose. (You'd think cogs in bureaucracies would respond positively to success. They absolutely don't. Bureaucracies and groups of humans generally only respond to conformity and against non conformity. So you do something amazing and they still try to fire you. ) "It's not a weakness." ADHD is a superpower if you learn how to use it. ADHDers the statistic I seen says we are equally likely to drop out of high school as we are to graduate from college. It's a bit like a motorcycle. Used with caution, developed skills -- amazing. Used without practice -- fatal. (It actually can be. Three of my cousins died young being impetuous.) I've lived at least five lifetimes. Seeing Avatar? I'd already been to that place in China. Stoicism helps, and you're probably already a stoic. (Just don't use "I'm a stoic" to act like a jerk. There are too many of those guys running around) . Read Epictetus who says, "You can continually improve so long as you get used to others thinking you foolish and stupid." Fixed Mindset verses Growth Mindset. Sorry to go on so long. Hope someone finds some value. Let's see what was I supposed to be doing......?
I read it all and OMG there are some things that 100% hit home for me. Also, the fact that you were so quickly switching topics, engaged me. You should write a book! :) "As a child I was always curious, take things apart, not be able to put them back together, get yelled at" ... too relatable. I like to say that one day I might die cos of my curiosity :D "Being too creative. What this really is is not having enough knowledge, experience, practice to come up with ideas that will actually work. " - That's such an interesting observation. It's gonna keep me thinking for a while... "This is why I can never learn enough about everything" - I worry about the same too. I spent 10 years in Academia and I've learned a lot of DIFFERENT things. Yes, psychology the most but that's so broad too. I kept getting into different topics and I feel like I never spent ENOUGH time into anything in order to become a true expert. I also don't agree with the 'experts' concept. You know? Focus on 1 thing and become really good at it vs focus on 10 things and become somewhat good at all of them.. I actually prefer the more holistic approach, because I want to have the ability to see a problem from different perspectives. Everything is connected and if you dont try to see into the 'everything', you don't understand how anything works. "So I made a database." - I'm 100% that you created something really useful :) "My hands were busy, my brain was busy translating what I was seeing and hearing into writing." - love that :) ""It's not a weakness." ADHD is a superpower if you learn how to use it." 💜 "I've lived at least five lifetimes" - Yup.. THANK YOU for writing this! I feel like we could be friends :) What are you teaching btw?
Thank you. I really appreciate your kind words. I enjoy a lot of the ADHD stuff on TH-cam, but you seem to drill right into it. Very clear concepts. The criticism that I should use paragraphs (I thought I did) is valid. There's an ADHD coach who is too disorganized. They say three things and then where are they? Sometimes just the right question can get us to make things happen. Clarify. I once hired Brooks Palmer the Clutter Buster. I wanted to clean up my house for Thanksgiving so , "Let's start in the living room." "Let's start with these kitchen drawers." "I hardly use those, the living room.... " "You hired a professional, you should listen to him." Books was brilliant. Three hours of minutiae "You have two of these. Do you use them? Can we throw one out?" Where would you look for something like this?" Four clean drawers, he left... However, within a week I nailed the rest of the house. I kept at it for a few more years. Was good at it. That is what understanding , focus and clear steps can accomplish. Now I just need a tune up. Brooks moved. I was a science teacher. Then I qualified for Gifted and Talented, Social Studies, Health. English, ESL. Study, take a test, another qualification. I taught middle school then voluntarily took leaving (another teacher with less seniority was really worried about leaving the school. Really? I'll go.) My last three years I was mostly a full paid sub. Taught every subject. Loved that part. I'd redo lessons, design lessons. Ten years total. Indeed, I am trying to write a book. Well I've been writing unpublished first drafts. But not about ADHD. For that I'll share with anyone anything I can. So anything you could use for a video that I might help with no problem. As a teacher and as me there's nothing I love more than someone living out their dream, doing better. Last couple of years my life was getting just too delayed. Used Covid as an excuse. Simple projects I just kept putting off. So I thought let's try Ritalin again. Still have some pills. Seems to help. Sought out a meds doctor, First step is therapy. Thought it would be a one time assessment. She started right in on therapy. Okay, I like therapy, give me a challenge. Why not use the therapist as a 'check in?' What can I report next week? That I watched TH-cam all week? Set my alarm for 5, got up, showered, put on a dress shirt and pants and set down to writing. One thing about ADHD and probably everybody's life is that it's all just starting over again and again and again. Frustrating, sure. The alternative is to just stay stuck. The benefit is we can stack up an amazing number of projects, adventures, art, writing, skills. @Evieran
It’s funny when I watch ADHD videos I’m surprised I thought I was the only one going crazy. Ive noticed when Im wanting to fight about every thing I just go home but I’m lucky I can do that because I have the great people around me that can run my buss. When I know it’s not best for me or them to go into the shop. I’m 59 and just starting to understand this thing that keeps me awake for days. I’m tired of starting a buss then to just throw it all away to run down anther rabbit hole. Thanks for your videos and for letting me write a few things because everyone just thinks I’m crazy but the more I dig the more I learn I’m not the problem. happy Turkey day from Las Vegas!!!!!
I scored high on the AQ-10 Autism test, i got 9/10 and have been contemplating the fact for years I likely have high-functioning ASD. Watching this video i have noticed that Rejection Dysphoria Disorder is something I suffer from intensely. I do know that ADHD and ASD come hand in hand sometimes. I do take rejection extremely hard in all its forms i am however able to take reasonable levels of criticism which is strange as i always want to improve. Helping friend is something that I have enjoyed intensely since Primary school. For example, i would make sure my work was done first (to varying standards) so i could help other people out. I just want to make my friends happy and get quite upset when my advances are not taken up as it takes a lot of energy for me to offer help and kindness. I know that it's nothing bad and they don't hate me but I just cant help it and eventually take it personally. It's funny as I am a confident person by nature. In contrast to my confidence, i can't even begin to fathom the feelings of rejection I have suffered in a romantic sense. I just cannot deal with it. Certainly has shed some light on my position. Great video!
This is the MOST spot on description I have found and trust me I have been watching a lot for a few years since I was diagnosed LOL I'm in my upper 40s.... so you can imagine how my youth was but it was all in my brain because I was so extremely shy and sensitive,
So far I've never made the decision to get a diagnose, but I do recognize pretty much all of the things mentioned here (or in general since quite some years). And I do realize that doesn't say I have ADHD, but to me it's more relevant that I'm slowly starting to understand myself and my behavior better and what things you can do (or rather not do) to handle the bad parts better, and get the best out of that weird and wonderful mind. And shared thoughts like in this video certainly contribute to that understanding ♥ And I just had to laugh because I'm watching this now at almost 3 AM while I promised myself to not dive in too many random things for a change.. well tomorrow then 😂
Such a great video, everything you said resonated with me! 1000% relate to this. Do you have any video on how to focus on something? I started a project, was hyperfocused, then as I managed to implement a large feature (I'm a dev), I just stopped and can't seem to get back to it. Would love some tips, or if you have any videos on the topic. Cheers!
OMG this is exactly how I am! I always wondered why I couldn’t sit & watch a movie at home. Not just with my spouse with anyone! I never connected it to my ADHD. You are great at explaining things. Plus your video is not real long which keeps my attention. I know this is from a yr ago but I hope I can find more from you. I hope you did that college one. Thx so much! 😊
It's been mentioned plenty in the comments so far, but I'd like to add my voice to those thanking you for providing such a concise and easily digestible explanation of what I'm dealing with on a day to day basis. I will be using this video to provide "outside" people with insight into my predicament. Thank you so much!
This makes sense. I seem to be more able to handle risks (ski, motorcycle, etc.) now into my 60's. But looking back, I've seldom have had bad outcomes from these activities. I remember once running late to a Dr.s appointment riding the motorcycle... perhaps having a few "close calls" but meh, no bother... when i arrived and they took my BP, it was actually normal (when it usually runs a little high). Also autonomy in work has always been important. Having someone step in and distract by directing me to do things a little differently just, YES distracts!
Wow, that was a very good explanation of how an ADHD-brain works. I recognized me in quite a lot of your examples. I am right now in the process of ADHD-Diagnosis although I'm pretty sure that I suffer from it. In fact, suffered from it for at least the last 25 years, befor that I was somehow still able to get along but then depression started to kick in. Until last year I was struggling without understanding why I couldn't overcome my depression while all physicists told me, it would go away eventually. Then I found a really good psychologist who recognized that my problems perfectly fit with ADHD-symptoms. ADHD is the explanation for me why I couldn't get better: because the reason for it is still there and untreated.
just discovered your channel. Great video! Love the way you explain things! I've just started trying to pursue content creation after being stuck in mundane and boring jobs. I also love what you said about writing down ideas - things stick better for me when i've physically written them down. I've also started carrying a voice recorder for when I'm driving somewhere and can't write down my ideas - it's been super helpful so far.
I'm writing a book and every time I have some good idea, I'm thinking "no way I forget this, I'll definitely write it down when I get to my laptop".... it NEVER happens! So I am starting to take random notes as my random thoughts occur :D
These insights accurately describe my symptoms and affirm my experience. I constantly hope I'm doing "good enough" for the narrative in my brain, my own worst critic. Except for the flashing, which broke my concentration a little bit. Thank you, great summary. I'll subscribe!
I’m 40 and was diagnosed a year ago, although it was evident from primary school that I had ADHD, my main issue is focus. I run my own business with 122 employees, I find sitting at the computer for more than 20 mins very challenging. I was first prescribed Ritalin, then Dexamphetamine. I’m slowing lower my dose and getting off it after a year. It certainly assist with my focus, however it fried my brain, I get the identical feeling I got in my 20’s after a weekend on coke, speed or ice. It can’t be healthy
I can relate to everything you've said. The pills give some new skills (such as focus) but they also take away. I try a lot of different things to cope with my symptoms without meds. I take meds only when I feel very overwhelmed and my mind is all over the place and I sort of feel like I wanna cry out of frustration and feeling helpless. So basically when the pain of all of it is too much, I take my meds for a few days or a week, to calm down, and then continue with my other methods. I sympathize a lot with your experience tho and I hope you find your balance too
Non-stimulant medications like atomoxetine may help. For me they impacted focus and auditory processing but had no effects on stimulation and motivation.
I've read/watched countless books, articles, and videos on the subject, and none of them has been as personally resonant as this eight minute video. Subscribed and very much looking forward to more!
Sometimes it's good to just speak from experience, and a bit of knowledge on the topic. I know I won't make sense to everybody, but I also know that to those who can resonate with me, it will feel nice to know that they're seen and understood. That's really the whole point here. And as much as I'd like to provide useful content, I dont have all the solutions, but I do have the empathy and the desire to offer some help :)
ปีที่แล้ว +3
This is an excellent overview of how the lack of dopamine affects our lives. I also love your positive outlook on whats natural for us. Thank you so much❤
I find it much better to accept our brain and find ways to befriend it, instead of fighting and blaming it. I'm glad the message is reaching the right people 💜
Wow… this explains so much… no wonder I can’t stand just sitting there watching mind numbing Tv with friends and family and need to distract myself or get up and move around. Thank you for helping me understand why and how ADHD impacts me and every one who has it.. fantastic video!!!!… Thank You 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️
Thanks for sharing, some of these ADHD stuff sounds so general it's hard to really know if it's actual ADHD or other contributing factors - diet, personality, lack of exercise, lack of low stimulation activities and stillness, too high of levels of dopamine throughout the day such as screen time and video games, lack of developmental character traits like self control or disciplined thought process, etc. Warren Farrell talks about this in his book "The Boy Crisis" and says that many people diagnosed with ADHD who are put on meds just have "inhibited dopamine function" due to other causations listed above. I wish there was an actual brain test instead of looking for symptoms and then diagnosing on something that most people struggle with on a subjective scale that is hard to compare beyond subjectivity. Regardless, I think it's helpful if we recognize that actually having a disorder like this doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it's still helpful with empathy with others and understanding ourselves so we can figure out coping mechanisms to achieve desired behavior and outcomes.
I agree with you! There is an actual brain test, but it's not common to do that. I find it ridiculous - we look at the heart before we diagnose it, but we don't look at the brain before we medicate it.. We have AI now and so much technological progress but we continue to diagnose in this old-fashioned way.. Ah, the lack of common sense sometimes :)
I think I have ADHD. Both my parents were teachers with child managing/engaging skills and had time for me so I did well as a child. They knew to find me activities and let me have alone time and knew how to teach a hyper 4 year old to read so I had reading. I also had various allergies to all processed food so we didn’t eat it. The sleep thing was always a problem. Even when you have adhd I imagine diet exercise and sleep can largely manage it.
Suffered from ADHD my whole life, only recently diagnosed in my 40's and you are absolutely spot on! I often say "It's not that I don't want to do anything, the problem is my brain wants to do all the things at once." I feel like this is something only some one who struggles with it can really understand because to your average person they can't wrap their head around it. "Just pick something!" it's so simple for them, while I have literally wasted entire days considering what I'm "about to do".....
This resonates so much. I am also wondering if neurotypical people just lack the amount of imagination and empathy constantly pouring down on us and that we have to handle every single moment. Now, that I am so aware how different I really am, I begin to realise that 'normal' people are maybe not necessarily better a focusing but have an idea kind of now and then and they experience having that idea as something special and exciting. Wich is mind blowing in a not so good way to me. It makes socializing and connecting with others such a tussle.
It's like this comment is written by me. Luckly the older I get the more ways I find to "work around it" that help me better with picking things to do and actually get them done as well, but it definitely stays a challenge for sure.
Days????? Hahaha... years.
I was first diagnosed at 37 and realized that I have spent my entire life creating good coping methods and fighting the less favourable methods - but without the bigger picture it was an unnecessarily heavy burden to maintain the bare minimum of stability to also function and advance in society. I have found peace and have started enjoying my many small traits and knowledge pools.
not alone, same here. Was just recently confirmed a few years back in 2018 while trying to reseach ADHD for my son who was diagnosed in elementary school and how it was a night and day difference for him after being properly treated and those around him knowing how severe he has ADHD. Makes sense however why I have several graduate degrees in IT in sectors so many fail at. The code and even say message traffic in a congested network just all melts away and becomes so simply for me to decode as well write code all even in my head not needing to write down . issue I have so much is with getting whats in my head out and that very few can keep up with me with coworkers calling me a "machine". LoL
Love that bit about Autonomy, it is often missed in discussions about ADHD. If something is of interest or urgency, autonomy w/ occasional checks is key to get things done. But interruption, disturbance in the environment, and being micromanaged = a slippery slope to burnout.
Yes, thats very good discription! Honestly, I was blaming myself for years for getting frustrated when somebody interrupts my hyperfocus, and it was actually due to content on the internet that I learned about the ADHD rage :D It isn't well captured in the research either (at least it wasn't a few years ago)
I’m frequently left wondering “how do these people think I’m supposed to get anything done when they’re asking me every four minutes if it’s done?”
Absolutely, I have never heard anyone link autonomy to ADHD. It makes complete sense to me. From early childhood, I could not bear being supervised or told what to do. It took a long time for me to realize having autonomy in my job was crucial for me to do my best work and to be happy.
@@kgeo753 I'm glad the video helps! Do you mind giving me your opinion? :) Should I make a video about Autonomy in general? As a concept in psychology and as part of one of the most researched and supported theories in PSY - Self-Determination Theory? Or if it is not ADHD related it wont be that interesting?
Literally why I can't get shit done. And I'm not even diagnosed
Her description of how ADHD impacts work is spot on. I believe there are evolutionary advantages to having ADHD that don't work well in a modern economy that creates jobs that are repetitive, don't require creative problem-solving, and force people to be sedentary. The same thing with Primary education. Early diagnosis is crucial for people to get on the right path in life. It's critical for parents and teachers to be able to recognize the behavioral traits of ADHD, seek an evaluation, and if diagnosed make sure they find constructive ways to keep the child engaged. ADHD can lead people to excel in life but too often it ruins people's lives because they're never diagnosed or they're diagnosed after doing a great deal of harm to themselves.
Thank you for this comment! It's reasonable yet positive, and it adds value to the video because I'm sure others read those comments too and they also feel supported 💜
I completely agree! I suggest that ADHD was likely advantageous in a time where hunter-gathering was still the norm.
It feels like a super power in high stress, results driven, important, potentially crisis situations. That's where we seem to be good. And those situations very rarely crop up these days. They absolutely would have done 1000s of years ago though.
If that was the case we would be having much more trouble than we do at the moment. There are lots of jobs that are not repetitive, require travel and creative problem solving and those are the types of jobs that people with ADHD thrive in.
Examples are the Gig work like stage hands at a theatre, any jobs that require freelancing. Engineering and Coding as well as landscaping all require you to find a middle ground between the environment and your clients needs. If anything modern day is the best time to have ADHD in since we have A. the relevant medication for ADHD, and B. the capacity to support far more jobs that are ADHD friendly. 100 years ago where there was still lots of factory wark for sure was not more ADHD friendly than today.
As a person with ADHD, yes it poses challenges, but we also have chances, and when you understand your strengths and weaknesses you can lead a lifestyle that suits yourself. Even if you have to switch your job every few years. (an advantage in some areas.)
The medical field is a great area to work in if you have ADHD. I'm an X-Ray Technologist and about half my department has diagnosed ADHD! It stays interesting because we do different procedures on different ages and types of people, you can go on to learn different imaging modalities (and some, like CT, you can sometimes learn on the job) and you can find the shift and days that work for you. I like midnights because I am working by myself so I get to run the show how I like and I don't have the constant interruptions of the phone ringing like day shift has.
If you work in a hospital, you never know what is going to come in the ER, and when the sh!t hits the fan, our hyperfocus abilities are AMAZING! You will also find that many of your peers in different departments also have ADHD: ER doctors, surgeons, nurses, respiratory techs, lab techs, security, and the EMT's and paramedics that bring some of the patients in that you will be imaging. It's a great field, but yes, a micromanager boss will absolutely RUIN it!
My husband was diagnosed with Inattentive ADD.....unfortunately not until he was 58 years old and our marriage was over. I wish he had been diagnosed as a child as it would have saved him many, many years of confusion, depression to the point of almost ending his life. He had many failed relationships and he couldn't understand why. He is now on medication and sees a therapist every two weeks. He is becoming who he says he was meant to be without all the 'chatter' in his head. He said that he always felt as if he was walking under three feet of water.
I pray for everyone to get diagnosed early and then can understand why they think and react the way they do. It's not a wrong thing, just different.
We are in the process of a divorce as 19 years of feeling gaslit has taken its toll on me. But I love him and only want the best for him. I'm just so happy that ge finally has answers.
I love your caring and understanding approach ✨
And yes, early diagnosis can help a lot (although we also risk over-diagnosing recently as our modern way of living can resemble adhd quite well, but one is a matter of bad habits and can be fixed relatively easily , the other is neurological difference that you eventually learn to cope with but you can’t re-wire yourself).
I hope your husband continues to find his true self 🤗
I hate dating with ADHD. I'm terrible at keeping up with texts, let alone initiating text conversations and sometimes I even forget to reply after I'm finished with something else I had to focus on and then the other person eventually either feels I'm not interested enough or they get really resentful towards me.
This is why you can do anything you don't need to do but can't do anything you need to. Learnt that on my last deep dive, and observing myself of course.
This. So frustrating!
spot on.. I am in lower cycle right now but I know it is also possible to get out of it. Over the years I HAVE gained massive wins. It takes self forgiveness and an amount of discipline most people do not have to deal with If your in a rut (like I am right now lol!) its important to remember to not put any blame/shame/guilt upon yourself. Remind yourself of your past winnings, of your moments of gratitude.
Knife in heart ...yikes hello Brother! Yes accomplishment seeming ly is my cocaine
This is honestly one of the best ADHD management videos I have ever seen. Short, sweet, and to the point. 👏🏼
Hands down! and recommended it to my therapist to show all including the parents and teachers of children. Thanks so much @EvieRan! Keep the content flowing, loving every bit of it!
gotta love those 30mins+ videos for people with ADHD.
The fear of forgetting your ideas is pretty valid fear, I usually have a lot of ideas that I didn't realized as teenager and with time I forgot them.
i bought a notebook for this yesterday.. and a very nice pen. but before i got the chance to write anything i already forgot it and left it somewhere 😂
How can you know what you've forgotten?!
I came up with so many ideas that other people made happen including Uber, Amazon lockers(delivery while you are out to a local business running a side franchise) , ebay (my idea was for vehicles only though), . I should be wealthy but I didn't have the motivation to try to implement them and thought I must be missing something obvious therefore it wouldn't work. I did share these ideas with family at the time but nobody took much notice. Then years later I'm shouting "I came up with that years ago!" to which the response was always "yeah but you were too lazy to do it."
I use Google docs app and a offline note app. I also use voice recording.
As soon as I get the idea I put it down, idc what I'm doing.
But also if you are in a meeting or something that requires you to pay attention. Pay attention😮. Because if you allow yourself to day dream you'll think of something new. Just distract yourself.
or fake writing notes.
If you are in the shower, keep your phone near to use if a good idea comes to mind
Yes! And somehow you know that you have to act quickly, otherwise someone else will run with the idea. But it is impossible to keep up with the ideas, even writing them down, because whole concepts flow into your mind on your commute home, when you cannot write it down. Names for websites, slogans etc. And then, when you artive home, its all gone… so many ideas, it is exhausting
Autonomy is SO important to me. Didn’t realize it was tied to ADHD. Also the thing about forgetting something that will pop in my brain. Oh yes! Always.
I don't think I've ever encountered an ADHD video that would so precisely describe my struggles and lay out the reasons in such a concise and logical way, so thank you very much. This information is sure to help a lot of us ❤
I’m so glad to read the encouraging and heartwarming comments here 💜 I always try to help but now I’m even more motivated to try and provide useful content. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and supporting me 😊✨
AMEN!
I didn't get diagnosed till I was 33 wish it had happened alot sooner. But I'm an Arborist(professional tree climber) and it works great with my ADHD. The work is very mentally and physically demanding and the heights and danger keep me so fully engaged that my mind doesn't wander at all when I'm climbing! I love it! I just have to be careful not to hyper focus and stay organized up there.
ADHD empathic w OCD (& CPSTD/PTSD)
I have been homebound since a year b4 COVID…and idk how to get “back out there”. Cannot believe this is now my reality; I was always on the go, but I was “masking” and really don’t know who I am, all these years later. 🕊️
I relate alot to this, I feel no need to get back out and socialize because it wouldnt be authentic.
I would just be present and nod my head.
I was told more than once. My problem was, I was from a "Broken home". I have ADHD. I found being a Surgical Tech a great job. I still failed at the people stuff. Thank you.
What's surgical tech can you explain
@@averagestudent4358 I'm sure they could explain better, but it's the people that assist the surgeon during surgery. They do all sorts of stuff from prepping and sterilizing the surgical equipment, to handing the instruments to the surgeon, getting that medical draping set up over/around the patient's area to be operated on, making sure everything works right prior to surgery, etc. Basically, they do a huge variety of things to make sure that the surgeon can focus on the surgery and not the myriad of details. In general, surgery techs help make surgery safer and more efficient!
Doing surgery on robots.
Just kidding, they either A. help the doctors and nurses while they're doing surgery, or be repair surgical equipment. I believe the former is what he's doing.
@@averagestudent4358
You are the first person who made me feel as though my brain is a good brain…. Now I sound like Frankenstein but seriously you point out positive aspects rather than making me feel as though there’s something wrong with me. I’ve always considered myself perceptive. Thank you
I don’t know what’s good or bad, but that’s exactly my point: this is arbitrary and if we have lived in a different environment, with different societal norms, maybe ADHD wouldn’t have been considered “disorder” but just “different”. I don’t know but self-blame; self-criticism and feeling “weird” surely don’t help, so I prefer to think about alternatives perspectives :) also, check the comments, somewhere I mentioned that my point isn’t to accommodate or dismiss the issues either. I’m just trying to find some balance 💜
Of course your ADHD is positive, its just the way it works. The only reason why its preceived negative is because we don't fit in our current worlds norms. for example 9-5 will rarely go well for an neurodivergent person.
@@YokoYoko_ thank you for sharing your support as well 💜
_Who's a good brain? Who? Yes, you are! You're the good brain!! ~pats brain~_
I'm nearly 54, without diagnosis. I can identify alot of traits and was asked by a work coleague who trained as Primary School Teacher, if i had ever been diagnoses. She said I was classic ADD/ADHD. That makes a huge difference from my experince of teachers from when i was in school, being stood at top of the class and being told that I was stupid ( maybe they thought I was lazy as I was always good at math). The biggest problems i've had are with RSD and Imposter Syndrome, which i would never have though were assiciated with ADHD. I honestly though there was something mentally wrong with me. Most days I would have an issue with someone, even my wife and friends. Now I know its a thing, i can work through 'talk myself down' from episodes... eventually. I still have problems with Imposter Syndrome and it causes a lot of stress. Something to work on!
I also have RSD & ADHD, along with Aspergers ... I see you, friend 🧡🧡
what helps with the imposter syndrom is to realize the "others" dont do anything better. we all know our own weaknesses and hide them to the outside. as a result we dont see them as easy in others but be aware on our own. that creates the wrong perception. but really the average person would be medicore by any standards in anything they do. yea shure you might not be as great as you want to be but usually its 100 times better than top quater
Thanks so much for this comment, and also for the replies. I’m glad I found this video
Sending good wishes and support in your journey to understand your brain.
I am a mid-50's female. Began stimulant meds 2 months ago. No regrets.
After a life of adding this and that habit, to improve outcomes of daily living, thriving was still out of reach. The realization that I was out of tools to behaviorally modify my life to the baseline success of neuro typicals landed hard. Like you, I asked a friend who had some knowledge in neurodevelopment. She helped me understand how ADHD presents differently for the genders and how the medicine works, if my doctor and I chose that route.
Rsd
Can you please do a video more directed at those with the inattentive type of ADHD specifically? I don’t have the hyperactive type and feel ignored because I am lumped together with the hyperactive energy types. Therefore having a career like a chef would be a complete disaster for me because I really don’t have the energy for that. In fact, that is my main struggle my complete burnout all the time. I have the hyperfocus you describe and also boredom in careers because the extroverts do the exciting architect part and then pass on the execution part to an introvert like myself. I struggle with being tidy and time management as well. Thank you.
I'm taking notes for video ideas!! :) Thanks for sharing your experience as well 💜
You are not alone ! Sometimes I just have to stop and spend time to clean up, put things away...I took an evening class on automotive work, and 15 min before end of class, the instructor would yell out - 15 min ! 15 min. Meaning it was time to clean up. I never used to do that, work till I could work no more at that time, and leave stuff all about. So I try to incorporate a 5-15 min clean, return, organize time when done working in my own garage.
@@DanTheManIOM Maybe I should try that. I see lots of detail and go down a rabbit hole of thoughts and ideas. Perhaps having a timer on for 15 mins would force me to do something without thinking. Actually, I have tried this and it does work. It needs the discipline to convert the process to habit. I read somewhere that it takes about 40 days to form a habit.
Could you go freelance/self employed or something. Personally, I’m a bit RSD and struggle to work for people so putting all my eggs in one basket in a bit and going self-employed which involves a passion I’ve had for years. All the best.
@@Groundwater24 Yes, I am going to have to. Employers just don’t get the fact that I can’t sit in a meeting for an hour, listen and absorb. I drift off and then they can’t understand why everyone else knows something from the meeting and I don’t. I got managed out of a job because although I could execute everything well and on time, I was hopeless at the soft skills. I have retrained and got a science degree, (which in itself was hard because revision is a nonsense when you cannot commit things to memory - another ADHD issue), and am going into private online teaching. At least I will understand the struggles of the shy, introvert kids who are bright. May I ask what your passion is?
I was diagnosed with ADHD since my teenage, spent my whole life fighting ADHD. Also suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.
Congrats on your recovery. Most persons never realizes psilocybin can be used as a miracle medication to save lives. Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death bud, lets be honest here.
Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Germany. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them
YES very sure of Dr.benfungi. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
100% agree I used to have Psychosis and paranoid thoughts like "people thinking about me talking about me etc. Very odd behavior after getting off Adderall from 7-16. Antidepressants at 18-29. 31 now. I took way to much, but took about 20g of Gold caps (Psilocybin containing mushroom) I analyzed my entire life. The emotions that came out helped me understand behavior etc more. Wont ever need to do it again because I'm happy and contempt forever, but I wish more people did this to alter their perception of reality. Would help with healing much trauma
How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta
Never felt so understood in my own adhd style. Thank you for your encouraging to embracing it more.
So my son was diagnosed with ADHD after his school teachers began noticing inattention in him. As I started understanding more about what was going on with him. I saw my own childhood story unfolding with him. As I am just now realising the things that made me believe I was unique or different, not in a necessarily negative way, are down to probably having similar issues. Watching this video was also like someone telling my story. I’m going to share this with my son. Thank you! Very very insightful
I'm glad this video resonated with you and your son's experiences. It's quite common for ADHD to run in families, suggesting a strong genetic component. Many adults only recognize their own ADHD symptoms after their children are diagnosed. Sharing this understanding can be a powerful way to connect and support each other. Keep exploring and learning together - it can make a big difference! 💜
Tell me, did you then proceed to stuff your son full with medicine?
@@semaph0re no, should I have?
@@lex3191 Some parents choose to give Ritalin to their, lets say, 14 year old, which sounds like a very bad idea to me.
@@semaph0re no we have not even had any discussions about medicating our child with any health care practitioners. Everything we have done with him are around awareness, for himself, and his teachers. We are working with him to help him identify unhelpful patterns and applying strategies that encourage him and build on his strengths. Thank you for your concern.
Wow. A summary of my life (74 yo) in 12 minutes including the idea of Bipolar vs ADHD. I saw it when I was first diagnosed with Bipolar after difficulties at work in my Forties.
Thank-you
I laughed out loud when you said emergency services to software developers for the types of jobs. I think I think I have ADHD and I wanted to be a paramedic, but now I'm a software developer. I always thought it was an odd transition, but it makes total sense now. I think I would've enjoyed either job.
Man, oh man! Did you just describe the last three weeks of my life. That makes so much more sense now. Thank you so much.
This is why things work with my husband. He's asd, I'm adhd. We like our "structured play time" together, but are also very comfortable doing our own thing.
For me, when I'm struggling, I very much feel like Alice falling down the rabbit hole - I can't grab anything on the sides to stop me falling, and I can't even see anything clear enough to know what to grab onto.
As for work, even though I have my Master's in International Relations, I preferred to take jobs managing businesses that I care nothing about, and spending my time reading books and studies I find important. I'm far more an "editor" than "creator". Building from the ground up is very overwhelming for me.
Time alone is extremely important to me.
Alice in Wonderland is one of my favorite 'kids' books (I dont think it's really meant for kids :D ) - because yes.. I definitely relate to your anology :)
I like what you are saying about the work - not being married to it, use it to provide, and then do your own thing. I actually think that this is pretty healthy and allows for better work-life balance.
This is me. I've never heard it expressed so clearly and accurately for literally everything I experience. It was suggested once some years ago that I might have ADHD, but I never really pursued it. At the time it was thought that I was depressed, but that medication did more harm than good. I've more or less moved myself into a spot where I get dopamine from cycling, and I had to let go of my design career as, even though I created amazing things when left to my own devices, the other aspects of the job were sometimes too overwhelming. I'm a little bored at work now, to be honest, but the QoL is good. Cycling and gaming keep me balanced and engaged, recharging me outside of work. I have a hard time finishing my personal projects though. I should probably look into ADHD again, although I prefer no medication. You're the first person I ever (virtually) met that hit the nail on the head for literally everything I experience.
It's crazy how identified I felt with this video. I feel like my level of dopamine is really low, this makes me quite talented at my work (the standard I set for myself is way higher than that of my peers), but also makes me feel soooooo freaking bored at times. Thank you for your video, subscribed.
Yes, the boredom is just ... ah, such a typical issue. Sometimes, I still guilt-trip myself about it. I wish I could stay engaged with the same thing for longer.. but at least it makes us better at more complex issues that would push some other people away :)
42 year old man with ADHD, and you nailed it. Great video great content I’ve used my ADHD to superpower..
Thank you, I’ve absorbed a lot but this is the first time I can understand subtle features of my work and relationship problems.
I was a design engineer in government with lots of autonomy but also often with no one really interested in my outputs.
Thank you for this. I was fired after 4.5 days from a job in a company that was so chaotic I managed to not only work out the pieces but got the disengaged re-engaged but also called out where the challenges were and presented it in a way that it came across threatening. Thanks again for this, I have to rewatch this a few times to see how I can not fall into this mess again.
Happens to the best of us!
Thank you for this video. I’m glad I’m living in a time where ADHD is more understood, but it’s still hard when not everyone understands what it’s like. 😢
Spot on with the little highlights on kinds of careers that suit ADHD in terms of the creativity, autonomy, and busywork. I am autistic and ADHD and I have a degree in emergency management but I felt the rigidity of the rules of an emergency management agency was too exhausting and now I work at a company that recycles and upcycles electronics to reduce e-waste and landfill poisoning and I am the only person in my department so I only answer to one person and am free to dictate my entire workflow as long as productivity remains.
Thank you so much for the clearest and most encouraging explanation of what it's like to have ADHD. It can indeed be a super power under the right conditions. For me, focus on regular meals with heathy foods plus adequate exercise are key to managing it.
Yes! Those 2 things help me tremendously as well :)
At 40 I was diagnosed with ADHD and I never understood why I would day dream, or just fiddle around with a task. But other times I would be so into it and get upset when interrupted. I knew I could hyper focus, I just didn’t know it was a thing. Also helps explain my issues with substances.
Hope you’re feeling better
One day at a time.😊
The last few years of my job as a computer software user support person were the most rewarding. Now the experience is a gift I observe once in a while with internal pride. It was something I could focus on one problem at a time. I really hope this for all of those with ADHD or have some disregulation or “rejection” problems.
I was never 100% sure whether i have ADHD or not but this pretty much wraps it up for me. Thank you!
Now more of us can work easier towards our goals and dreams. :)
This is the second video that impressed me with its clarity, wealth of information and compactness.
If I hadn't had to discover all the things that are said here for myself by reading and trying them out, I probably could have saved a few years.
Respect for your clear messages and examples.
I resonated so much with this video that I cried. I am in my early 40’s and am going to the doctor finally for a diagnosis in a few weeks. Set up an appointment today. ❤ thank you for the video
Thanks so much for making this video. You are the first person I have heard talk about how those of us with ADHD have the ability to hyperfocus. Everyone else is always talking about how we are easily distracted. I am a Fine Art Painter. It is my ADHD that enables me to be good at it. So, I prefer to think that I have an ability rather than a "disorder." Calling this a "disorder" is like saying really smart people have a "Genius Disorder" or really tall people have a "Height Disorder."
It is my suspicion that the reason we are labeled as having a "disorder" is because medication can be prescribed for disorders and disorders can be treated by psychiatrists both of which make money for somebody. It seems to always be about the money, doesn't it?
So, I have a proposal. . .lets stop calling this a "disorder" and change the name from ADHD to HICA to stand for "Highly Innovative Creative Ability." Just because we don't fit into someone else's pigeon hole, doesn't mean we have a disorder.
Thanks again for your video. Let's keep focusing on the positive aspects of this amazing gift.
AGREE 💯💯💯
"because medication can be prescribed for disorders" - In the US, it's a business. I won't get tired of saying that a healed patient is a lost client. I do know that some people have more severe symptoms and that medication helps them tremendously, but there are also some other people who could benefit from learning some tools; befriending their brain; and receiving more acceptance and support vs 'just take that pill'. Actually, everybody could benefit from that..
I dont want to say it is only positive either because I want to respect how much some people struggle with it. But I also want to focus on WHY they struggle - is it because their adhd brain is all that bad or it is because they have been told that they have a disorder that they cant control without pills? How much of this suffering is because of the biology, and how much of it is because of our society. Asking kids to sit down for 8h and go home to do some more focused work - how is this healthy?! .. Ah, yeah, it's complex but I am here to provide more positive outlook and support and tools as much as I can ✨
Thank you for leaving me the comment, it helps so much! I feel so grateful for the opportunity to connect with similar people 💜
Can I ask you if it was hard coming to that feeling? I’m currently struggling A LOT in college and despite trying to work WITH it, adapting my lifestyle around functioning and mental space, I still feel like it’s still for sure a disorder. It’s a lack of order, and though there are positives, I find it hard to compare it to an ability? Like how the world is not built around physical disability, and that’s why it’s as debilitating as it is, but it wouldn’t change the fact that it’s an impairment. You lack a leg, regardless of how well you’re living with it, that’s still a disability.
It is a disorder of EXECUTIVE FUNCTION, though and for some, it legitimately destroyed their lives, also with addiction issues and more. Low dopamine etc. is no joke and it is a SPECTRUM T-T Some can make it work, some can't. I for my part crashed and burned after decades of no appropriate support, achievements and without medication. So there is that. Sorry, but I'm not vibing with positivity if ADHD destroyed my whole family, took some of my family members eary (for Dr. Barkley also) and all that stuff. But great if others can make it work.But just because it has some positives, doesn't mean it's a gift. It's more akin to a curse.
@Chizuru94 🫂 i am here with you...i am a late diagnosis (54 F) ...things could have been so much different had we known. The best i can do is talk to my daughters so they can make changes in their lives( they are adults now)
This video has succinctly summarized in less than 10 minutes what I have been going through my entire life. I'm in my 40's and have not been formerly diagnosed yet, but I am putting everything in place that I can to combat low dopamine. Thanks so much for this video!
Same. I’m 46 and have had it pointed out in the last 12 months
You're expressing this so well, it's astonishing! I'm also studying psychology and have ADHD, and I can see how your knowledge and personal experience combined together really shine. I really think personal experience combined with knowledge make all the difference--so we can get to the heart of something, in this case ADHD. Keep up the good work!
Thank you!! And yes, I completely agree with you about combining knowledge with experience. If you only read - everything is so abstract and foreign. If you only experience - everything is so confusing and weird. The combination helps :)
Diagnosed at 47 because I got burned out and spent 5 years with the 'black dog'. It's validating hearing you speak about some of the challenges as you speak to some of my experiences. I used to think that I was simply broken, and kind of was, because of all the silly mistakes I used to make and that I didn't trust previous experiences in order to build confidence. Now that I'm medicated, I my confidence is building AND I'm slowly being able to remind myself of my previous experiences. I'm almost certain i got bogged down with this, in part, because I couldn't imagine a world where i could let go of people pleasing; i couldn't imagine myself ever being free of those silly mistakes. My diagnosis and medication have given me a brand new and ever improving life. There are still challenges, new and existing but it feels achievable now. Thanks for speaking up and sharing your wisdom 🙏.
Wow hit the nail on the head. Great video! Especially the part about Bi-polar. They always tried to say I was Bi-polar but I knew I wasn’t, only confirmed more to me that I know now in my 40s I have ADHD.
This is incredible. I was diagnosed with ADHD 20+ years ago and to date this is one the best summations I’ve ever heard.
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.sporessss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place.
Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
He's constantly talking about killing someone.
He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
Is he on instagram?
Yes he is. dr.sporessss
I’m 44; struggled MDD and GAD for the last 10-12 years, and found some really impressive relief with modafanil.
It’s only very recently, with my teenage daughter (and my brother) being diagnosed with ADD that I’ve started to realize I also have it. Everything you’ve said here is absolutely spot on; I can’t believe it’s taken me so long to notice it. I’m booked for an assessment next week…
Work autonomy is EXTREMELY important to me, and since becoming a supervisor it's been baffling to realize how many people require or desire much more oversight. I've only just been diagnosed as having ADHD at 33 after years of wondering and having transient psychiatry specialists try to help me seek a differential diagnosis (my psychiatrist suspects potential autism as well but isn't well versed in diagnosing autism so we're just focusing on ADHD, anxiety and depression for now 😂). I'm dealing with having a lot of weird, bizarre expectations at my job that has led to burnout (I'm expected to be an event planner for ~80 people...this has nothing to do with my actual job, it's completely separate and I'm not properly supported in any of it)
Also I just got to the bipolar misdiagnosis part, and that's EXACTLY what happened to me! I was even put on antipsychotics because I told them about my brain racing constantly and making almost audible conversations at me. I've been diagnosed with a whole slew of things that never seemed to fit and that later psychiatrists would roll their eyes at before putting a different, still ill-fitting label on
I should clarify that bipolar is when the mood swings are over longer periods of time. In this video, I should've said bordeline personality disorder given that I was talking about daily switches. The timeframe is extremely important factor here, when other symptoms can be so similar.
We can’t stand being micromanaged I have the ASD and combined ADHD dual diagnosis I’m 43
Getting familiar with the neuroscience research has really changed my life for the better! I stopped feeling bad about myself, once I started understanding no neurotype is bad! We are just different. ❤
P.S. I don’t have ADHD, but autism and bipolar disorder, but I have close family members with ADHD. This helps me understand them and there’s also information that has helped them understand me. I have a lot of hope, because of your work and the work of others in the field of psychology. I used to distrust mental health systems, but they are becoming more and more scientifically-based and helpful. I’m even studying in a graduate Psychology program now…something I never saw myself doing! Glad I found your channel. New Sub!
These videos has saved me in so many ways as I never knew why I am as I am, as no one has ever thought of me as having ADD or ADHD although I fit on almost all the videos I watch about it.
It has helped me so much to understand myself and get the most out of the brain I have.
Thanks 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Helping people feel better is my dream come true, so thank you so much for sharing this 💜
Thank you @@Evieran
What an excellent video ! I know I have adhd. I was given medication as a kid but hated it because of the stigma. Somewhere in high school, I dropped off and in college the doctor's thought i had bi polar because i went through a drug(weed) and stress induced psychosis. But that diagnosis never sat with me. This makes so much more sense. The relationship aspects and emotions being sensative to criticism and always needing to do something together the fomo and soooo many ideas i grt lost in myself. Ive started writing them down more now its helping for sure.
Ah, you've had a lot to deal with for sure! ;/
And indeed, bipolar disorder can actually be mistaken for ADHD and vice versa, if the scale of the events and the timeframes are not taken into account. I'm glad to hear that you found ways to feel better. And yeah, we [as a society] have a mental crisis but the good thing about it is that more and more people are talking about their symptoms and sharing their experiences. One of the worst things about brain disorders is that u get convinced that u are not okay, u are weird, u are weak etc, but then u start hearing others and u understand that blaming yourself for your brain disorder is like blaming yourself for your heart disorder - sometimes u can affect it, but not always, and not entirely.
Makes it sound far better than it is living with it. Teachers and institutions had crushed me due to time, deadlines, and strict regulations.
Creativity is not... really easy to articulate within an organization. I learn crazy fast, good at many things, but really... the bad far outweighs the good.
Meds help tons, but the feeling of detachment from the present after crunching repetition to pay the bills turns really ... unbearable. Living steady or dying? I prefer dying. I quitted again.
I have had plenty of chances to just live by and get enough to eat and relax... but the emotionality really breaks my ... it is worse than physical pain often, so I've caused myself physical pain to cope.
I am so glad I am ... "super". oh, and having lots of friends also is wonderful...
Some has it better, no doubt. I chose Philosophy and later arts... what a turd. Can you draw all day same stuff for animation? Good stuff. Creativity? Not much really, just sit down and do your reps... that's the problem. No matter if you are the best of the bunch... no reps? No job. Ah... in all fairness, I lasted a decade without meds and got diagnosed recently. I guess it would be better later... but without meds this is insane. A curse... for sure.
I know some people have it worse but I am also tired of people being judged and discouraged for having a little bit different brain. We live in a non-adhd society, that’s mostly the problem.
I’m so sad reading this (adhd, sensitivity, u know the drill). Lets have a chat? Contact me through the email. Yes, a free chat, I coach but I don’t mean « hire me », I mean « lets just have a friendly chat ». I cant ignore your message, u know
I feel for u & wish I could give u some peace. I'm nearly 60, undiagnosed w no doubt that this is me. I have a son , 26 now who is/was ADHD, ODD & a bit OCD so started meetings to learn. Surprise! I'm ADHD too! Mind blown but it makes sense. I can follow all u wrote & where u went w ease cuz ur moving at my speed but I can also feel that underlying frantic pace u live at. I wish I could turn it back a cpl knotches for u.....so u could enjoy more....I truly hope u find relief & peace & happiness. I hope one day u can stop....sit........& have a glass of tea. God bless u my friend I truly admire u
I really relate to what you've said. Twice now, after being hired to work for some random corporation that I couldn't care less about and doing mind-numbing, soul-crushing work day in and day out, I decided that it's not worth it to waste my time and energy helping the rich get richer while I get paid just enough to cover my bills. luckily I'm in a spot where I can afford to live off of savings for a little bit and just try my best to channel my energy into creative pursuits, but it's anxiety-inducing because I have no idea if it will ever pay off. Unfortunately for me, quitting jobs also means I can't afford meds though so I'm just free balling it at this point. I somehow managed to get through my first semester back in uni without flunking everything though so I just hope that I can keep that up, but only time will tell XD Thanks for your comment, you are not alone in your struggles and best of luck!
Thanks! Thank you for the validation! And for encouraging me (and others) to explore our super powers instead of apologizing for them.
I'm 35 and just getting going on my ADHD journey. Your words couldn't be any more true!!! I have my own business where I make a significant amount less than pretty much any job I could go get, however the absolute freedom is priceless.
May I ask you what you do? I just moved to working in a kitchen preparing food and I absolutely love it! Very simple and repetitive but the team is lovely and no one breathing down your neck!!
Same here my friend. Been self employed for 13 years, I have good years and bad years. I could make more money by working much much longer hours at a 9-5 but I wouldn’t trade my freedom for that.
@@williamswayuk I'm a mechanic for motorcycles and scooters. It's such a random thing to latch onto but I LOVE it. Everyone is different but I absolutely cannot do repeating jobs, I can hardly stand doing the same thing two days in a row. What I do requires me to figure out how to fix new things almost daily, keeps me mentally very sharp. I genuinely get to help people every day.
@@brkbtjunkie the freedom cannot be overlooked. I'm lucky enough to have started my business with my best friend who also it's ADHD. We work hard but talk about life every single day. Can adjust hours however we like, take off any holiday we like, ask each other for time off (when possible). It's really shown me #1 it's a lot easier to start your own business than most people tell you and #2 the freedom absolutely is priceless, and I'll never get a 'normal' job again!
@@williamswayuk this is a me thing so don't think I'm telling you how to live, but for me the defining quality in a job is creation. I can't do jobs that don't actually physically do or create something. Jobs like straight up customer service, or anything like that would drive me absolutely mad. My mind was built to fix things.
This is the best ADHD video I have ever seen and I’ve watched A LOT! I was late diagnosed at age 52 but everything you said in this video is absolutely spot on. I’m sending this to everyone!
Wow, you explained this really well. This brought up memories of situations from over 20 years ago before I was diagnosed.
Thank you for this video! ADHD how it affects relationships is often overlooked in terms of content but this blew my mind! My wife loves watching TV series which has causes some arguments in the past because I often get bored I cant sit still for a 1 hour episode or I begin overanalyising the plot of the show etc because I am lacking in stimulation! I never really thought how my nurodivergence played into something like this!
Yeah spot on, diagnosed at 33 with ADHD, under stimulated or over stimulated at work has always been an issue for me
I'm so grateful for you! I just found this, what you shared and explained was so incredibly on point with my existence and the obstacles I have internally and with others.
You touched on several things in my life with my spouse and my work that were clarifying. I cried with a spectrum of sad and joyful feelings and am excited to share this with my spouse, I feel it will help signifantly.
I'm an Entertainer - Performing Artist & Speaker -
Magician / Musician / Guy Who Talks
Mille Grazie Evie!!
Thank you so much for helping so many people with ADHD. My son was diagnosed at the age of 28. This is helping me, my wife, and my son so much . Keep on with your great work 👍 xx
This is extremely helpful and relatable. I can tell you are also like this because you speak about it so accurately. I’ll watch other videos you have done on the subject.
Hey Evie, at a really low point in my life and even though I know why and what do as you know it’s about the delay in doing that’s the issue. Your eloquent words have just helped me find the centre point again, keep up the amazing work thx x
Astoundingly high quality content. I really appreciated the talk about relationships, I feel like my partner and I definitely struggle with this as a couple where both parties have ADHD.
Dang... you get me :)! It is really huge relief when you find someone like you who can understand you. Thank you for this video.
That was one of my main reasons for having this channel - remind people that they are not alone in whatever they’re going through :)
This was a TRULY well-thought out, well-paced analysis!
Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. We just have more of them, and that goes both ways. It's just that we, and people around us, often focus on the negative aspects because they can be so detrimental to our lives. One of my superpowers is the extremely cinematic dreams my brain presents to me very often. I write the good ones down and I'm slowly filling up a big format notebook with ideas for movies, video games, comics and everything else besides poems and other tidbits.
love this creative outlet! 🌟
You’ve really hit the nail on the head here. I spent years working in a very traditional corporate structure where my autonomy was always limited. The company was only focused on profit and not providing quality to the clients. I reported to a manager with no higher education and about 50 less IQ points than I. No matter how much I tried to fit the mold I was utterly miserable. I got sick of dealing with someone who didn’t even understand the job I was doing or how to evaluate anyone on their performance in it.
When I finally started my own company in the same field, even though I was technically doing essentially the same job as before, I was so much happier because I could actually do it properly without constantly being impeded by an absolute moron. My clients are much happier too, since I’m able to use that hyper-focus to their advantage, consistently delivering higher quality advice and work products.
I soooo much relate to that. Just reading your first paragraph makes me irritated with the idea of working at this position :D
Deciding to quit and do your own thing wasn't easy, I'm sure, but I'm so glad to hear that it worked out! And yes, people with ADHD have focus, and quite amazing focus actually, but they have difficulties controlling it. Being in charge and sensing autonomy definitely helps, and then you can use your qualities as strengths :)
I relate to this. I hope I can work for myself one day. And run my team well unlike what I’ve observed in past team leaders.😢
You are literally describing me. So many ideas not a lot of follow through because I'm onto the next one.
The work autonomy point is a really interesting one and not something I'd considered about my own career. I think I've likely stumbled my way into building a niche for myself with a nearly ideal balance of autonomy and challenge. There are other aspects such as relentless on-call and after hours work that make me miserable but this video is making me more strongly consider trying harder to fix those problems rather than simply moving on. I am unlikely to have this level of autonomy elsewhere as it is based on the buildup of trust over many years.
I work in the medical field, and this information is spot on. I can't tell you how much learning to take criticism as a good thing instead of personal can really help, as well as learning ways to stay focused and task oriented. I have a position that allows me to work my own schedule and work at my own pace. Others might think this would lead to slacking off, but I often do a very high work load in a short period of time, many times I get into the zone and can output a lot of productivity. I am glad I have a job that allows me this autonomy, I would advise others to try and find this.
Such a great video! You pointed out the positive side of ADHD which I found very helpful and encouraging. Thank you!!
I'm so very happy to help ^^
This video explains and helps me with so much of what I’ve been going through my whole life. Thank you.
I’ve been diagnosed with ASD but I felt like you just described me. I know there is a lot of overlap but maybe I have ADHD as well. I keep a thick project book where each page is an idea with a list of steps needed to complete it. I date when I have the idea and date when it is completed. It has helped massively to clear my brain of swirling ideas and I don’t pressure myself to complete everything.
OMG your idea sounds so mentally satisfying just reading it! I don't know if I could get around to organize such a thing for myself but it sounds so helpful. As far as ASD goes, I read a lot about in the comments here. It's a common struggle to have them both unfortunately
Dual diagnosis is common I have both
Getting help for my ADHD after 60 years. Better now than never. Thanks for your channel.
Very helpful video! Easy to follow! Thank you!😊
This is the best summary of adhd I’ve ever seen. Nailed it.
I have ADHD and a very severe case of dysgraphia. Unfortunately taking notes is not a strong suit of people with disgraphia as it causes a significant amount of anxiety which when combined with the ADHD is very very difficult to manage. I practically rely on my phone to record most of the stuff. I use the calendar heavily as well as the notes app (Android) because it allows me to make bullet points in order for me to break down larger projects into more bite size pieces in order that I don't try to do the whole thing at the same time and not accomplish anything. Just wanted to kind of drop that as a pro tip from an old ADHD.
This is very valuable, thank you for sharing! This discussion section has become a wonderful place for support 💜
I was just thinking how I'm always in a state of FOMO -- your description makes sense. Thx!
Very informative content.
Plus, the way it was explained and edited was very ADHD friendly.
You are EXACTLY describing me! Thank you for the well-spoken and concise advice. I’m inching closer to self acceptance
I'm not being hyperbolic when I say that my ADHD made it very difficult to watch the entire video.
As someone who has never been diagnosed but all signs point towards Inattentive & Hyper-Focused types od ADHD, this video makes me feel a lot better and helps me realise how much my career as a software engineer has been boosted by my ability to maintain a wide surface level thought process and also have those narrow sessions of focus. The only problem is, at 24 years old, I still don't know how to choose which one I experience at any one time :)
Thank you so much for making this video, I got so much useful information from listening to you that I feel inspired to make positive changes to my life. (Again) lol. Note taking for example, I haven’t taken notes for a long time that I’d forgotten how useful it is.
In reflecting over the jobs in which I have excelled during the last four decades, as well as those from which I was fired within a week of starting, I understand this video to be the best advice I ever had. I am grateful for your sharing your ideas. You have opened my mind to understanding my ADD and how it might affect my relationships with others and how I must balance my creativity with making progress toward tangible goals, with regard to my work.
What you say about work is as perfect as I've ever heard it described. Challenges, innovation, autonomy. I'm ADHD diagnosed.
I find most people to be a bit boring. Low dopamine? What I know is that when I did a psychological inventory 20 years ago I kept downplaying "I often feel ecstatic," "I think the world is absolutely amazing." I was worried they'd think I was bipolar. I wasn't always happy all the time. As a child everything seemed hard, I always seemed to be in trouble. At one point I decided that I had a passion and I wasn't going to let anyone crush it.
As a child I was always curious, take things apart, not be able to put them back together, get yelled at. One day I fixed my sister's bicycle. I still got yelled at. But I realized, the bike works -- that means I'm right. First layer of armor. If it works, if it's better -- I don't care what anyone says.
Sure I have frustrations.
Physical. Too many people don't seem to do much physical activity. Every academic and intellectual success I've had goes right back to that bicycle and learning carpentry. Real physical world. Bureaucrats can sit around and decide what's best. Ridiculous. The only and best test is: does it work? Framing houses I learned to break things down into steps, make them efficient and make sure it's practical.
Mental: Few things engage me as much as a new idea. But I do have a constant need to do what I call (incorrectly) "burning off extra neurons". The ADHD ambient music videos, listening to any audiobook while I drive, sail my boat, do regular chores, food shopping. It's not multitasking. Once I'm in the zone hyperfocusing that's all I need. Mihaly Chiksentmihaly calls it 'Flow.'
Being too creative. What this really is is not having enough knowledge, experience, practice to come up with ideas that will actually work. This is why I can never learn enough about everything. Six years ago I bought a sewing machine because I wanted to understand how that works. Three years ago I became a sailor. Earlier this year I sailed as one of a four person crew from Vietnam to Canada.
What I find to be most powerful is synergy- applying solutions from different fields. Photographers and movie crews used to do a similar task completely differently, applying one to the other gave me an advantage. As a teacher I built science equipment using techniques I learned making furniture, construction, plumbing. Graphic design; made better lessons. I could never do all the BS grade entry stuff in the stupid forms they made us fill out. I was always last, I was always made to do it again. So I made a database. Designed it to actually work. Then I had pages laid out like the school forms. They flat out refused to accept them. But now I just had to copy over to the dumb form. And I had better records than the school district. And now I was first handing in my grades. (One would think they'd notice...)
Great video. Journal writing. Yes! It may take you five years of writing entries that if your younger sister finds them she will embarrass the pants off you. But after 5 years, you will be writing entries that if you read later enhances your memory of an experience. You become one of your favorite writers. Also by getting the idea down and clear (as I'm doing here as much for practice, procrastination as for hopefully helping and encourage a fellow ADHDer) you learn how to complete a thought,. You learn and practice how to catch yourself jumping subjects. You also learn how to have a more complex, nuanced and valuable idea. Incredibly powerful tool. One difficult year of teaching I wrote over 1.5 million words. I learned a lot, kept my head straight. One problem with developing writing, other people will seem to think even slower than before. Meh. So write an amazing novel.
I take a lot of notes. Started doing this in college. My hands were busy, my brain was busy translating what I was seeing and hearing into writing. Once I lost a notebook, still did good on the exam. Maybe I don't need to take notes? Did bad on the test. Lesson learned? Take the notes, always take the notes even if you never look at them again. That processing as you're writing the notes is very powerful.
Autonomy. Do what's required, but do it the way it works, do more. It's a Venn diagram. Our bubble includes the boring bubble. As a teacher we were supposed to do X, we were also supposed to use the 'new initiative' which was always complete nonsense. The ADHD method is to do X, satisfy the nonsense, giving it some credibility, but make sure my lessons were effective and interesting. Autonomy doesn't mean we ignore the boss, it means we do all that in such a way it doesn't interfere with us doing it the better way we choose. (You'd think cogs in bureaucracies would respond positively to success. They absolutely don't. Bureaucracies and groups of humans generally only respond to conformity and against non conformity. So you do something amazing and they still try to fire you. )
"It's not a weakness." ADHD is a superpower if you learn how to use it. ADHDers the statistic I seen says we are equally likely to drop out of high school as we are to graduate from college. It's a bit like a motorcycle. Used with caution, developed skills -- amazing. Used without practice -- fatal. (It actually can be. Three of my cousins died young being impetuous.) I've lived at least five lifetimes. Seeing Avatar? I'd already been to that place in China. Stoicism helps, and you're probably already a stoic. (Just don't use "I'm a stoic" to act like a jerk. There are too many of those guys running around) . Read Epictetus who says, "You can continually improve so long as you get used to others thinking you foolish and stupid." Fixed Mindset verses Growth Mindset. Sorry to go on so long. Hope someone finds some value. Let's see what was I supposed to be doing......?
Holy shit dude. If you want people to read your wall of text at least use paragraphs
I read his text wall with no problems. To someone with ADHD, this guy is speaking my language 😂
I read it all and OMG there are some things that 100% hit home for me. Also, the fact that you were so quickly switching topics, engaged me. You should write a book! :)
"As a child I was always curious, take things apart, not be able to put them back together, get yelled at" ... too relatable. I like to say that one day I might die cos of my curiosity :D
"Being too creative. What this really is is not having enough knowledge, experience, practice to come up with ideas that will actually work. " - That's such an interesting observation. It's gonna keep me thinking for a while...
"This is why I can never learn enough about everything" - I worry about the same too. I spent 10 years in Academia and I've learned a lot of DIFFERENT things. Yes, psychology the most but that's so broad too. I kept getting into different topics and I feel like I never spent ENOUGH time into anything in order to become a true expert. I also don't agree with the 'experts' concept. You know? Focus on 1 thing and become really good at it vs focus on 10 things and become somewhat good at all of them.. I actually prefer the more holistic approach, because I want to have the ability to see a problem from different perspectives. Everything is connected and if you dont try to see into the 'everything', you don't understand how anything works.
"So I made a database." - I'm 100% that you created something really useful :)
"My hands were busy, my brain was busy translating what I was seeing and hearing into writing." - love that :)
""It's not a weakness." ADHD is a superpower if you learn how to use it." 💜
"I've lived at least five lifetimes" - Yup..
THANK YOU for writing this! I feel like we could be friends :) What are you teaching btw?
Thank you. I really appreciate your kind words. I enjoy a lot of the ADHD stuff on TH-cam, but you seem to drill right into it. Very clear concepts. The criticism that I should use paragraphs (I thought I did) is valid. There's an ADHD coach who is too disorganized. They say three things and then where are they? Sometimes just the right question can get us to make things happen. Clarify.
I once hired Brooks Palmer the Clutter Buster. I wanted to clean up my house for Thanksgiving so , "Let's start in the living room."
"Let's start with these kitchen drawers."
"I hardly use those, the living room.... "
"You hired a professional, you should listen to him." Books was brilliant. Three hours of minutiae "You have two of these. Do you use them? Can we throw one out?" Where would you look for something like this?" Four clean drawers, he left... However, within a week I nailed the rest of the house. I kept at it for a few more years. Was good at it. That is what understanding , focus and clear steps can accomplish. Now I just need a tune up. Brooks moved.
I was a science teacher. Then I qualified for Gifted and Talented, Social Studies, Health. English, ESL. Study, take a test, another qualification. I taught middle school then voluntarily took leaving (another teacher with less seniority was really worried about leaving the school. Really? I'll go.) My last three years I was mostly a full paid sub. Taught every subject. Loved that part. I'd redo lessons, design lessons. Ten years total.
Indeed, I am trying to write a book. Well I've been writing unpublished first drafts. But not about ADHD. For that I'll share with anyone anything I can. So anything you could use for a video that I might help with no problem. As a teacher and as me there's nothing I love more than someone living out their dream, doing better.
Last couple of years my life was getting just too delayed. Used Covid as an excuse. Simple projects I just kept putting off. So I thought let's try Ritalin again. Still have some pills. Seems to help. Sought out a meds doctor, First step is therapy. Thought it would be a one time assessment. She started right in on therapy. Okay, I like therapy, give me a challenge. Why not use the therapist as a 'check in?' What can I report next week? That I watched TH-cam all week? Set my alarm for 5, got up, showered, put on a dress shirt and pants and set down to writing. One thing about ADHD and probably everybody's life is that it's all just starting over again and again and again. Frustrating, sure. The alternative is to just stay stuck. The benefit is we can stack up an amazing number of projects, adventures, art, writing, skills. @Evieran
@joshchapman4753 if you wanted to read it you wouldn't care if it had paragraphs? The information stays the same regardless of a few empty lines 😂
It’s funny when I watch ADHD videos I’m surprised I thought I was the only one going crazy. Ive noticed when Im wanting to fight about every thing I just go home but I’m lucky I can do that because I have the great people around me that can run my buss. When I know it’s not best for me or them to go into the shop. I’m 59 and just starting to understand this thing that keeps me awake for days. I’m tired of starting a buss then to just throw it all away to run down anther rabbit hole. Thanks for your videos and for letting me write a few things because everyone just thinks I’m crazy but the more I dig the more I learn I’m not the problem. happy Turkey day from Las Vegas!!!!!
I scored high on the AQ-10 Autism test, i got 9/10 and have been contemplating the fact for years I likely have high-functioning ASD. Watching this video i have noticed that Rejection Dysphoria Disorder is something I suffer from intensely. I do know that ADHD and ASD come hand in hand sometimes. I do take rejection extremely hard in all its forms i am however able to take reasonable levels of criticism which is strange as i always want to improve. Helping friend is something that I have enjoyed intensely since Primary school. For example, i would make sure my work was done first (to varying standards) so i could help other people out. I just want to make my friends happy and get quite upset when my advances are not taken up as it takes a lot of energy for me to offer help and kindness. I know that it's nothing bad and they don't hate me but I just cant help it and eventually take it personally. It's funny as I am a confident person by nature.
In contrast to my confidence, i can't even begin to fathom the feelings of rejection I have suffered in a romantic sense. I just cannot deal with it. Certainly has shed some light on my position. Great video!
This was like reading my own life
This is the MOST spot on description I have found and trust me I have been watching a lot for a few years since I was diagnosed LOL I'm in my upper 40s.... so you can imagine how my youth was but it was all in my brain because I was so extremely shy and sensitive,
So far I've never made the decision to get a diagnose, but I do recognize pretty much all of the things mentioned here (or in general since quite some years). And I do realize that doesn't say I have ADHD, but to me it's more relevant that I'm slowly starting to understand myself and my behavior better and what things you can do (or rather not do) to handle the bad parts better, and get the best out of that weird and wonderful mind. And shared thoughts like in this video certainly contribute to that understanding ♥
And I just had to laugh because I'm watching this now at almost 3 AM while I promised myself to not dive in too many random things for a change.. well tomorrow then 😂
most accurate concise ADHD vid I've seen in a long time, also diagnosed in my 40s, RSD, decision paralysis and changing tasks are my biggest struggles
Such a great video, everything you said resonated with me! 1000% relate to this. Do you have any video on how to focus on something? I started a project, was hyperfocused, then as I managed to implement a large feature (I'm a dev), I just stopped and can't seem to get back to it. Would love some tips, or if you have any videos on the topic. Cheers!
OMG this is exactly how I am! I always wondered why I couldn’t sit & watch a movie at home. Not just with my spouse with anyone! I never connected it to my ADHD. You are great at explaining things. Plus your video is not real long which keeps my attention. I know this is from a yr ago but I hope I can find more from you. I hope you did that college one. Thx so much! 😊
It's been mentioned plenty in the comments so far, but I'd like to add my voice to those thanking you for providing such a concise and easily digestible explanation of what I'm dealing with on a day to day basis. I will be using this video to provide "outside" people with insight into my predicament. Thank you so much!
This makes sense. I seem to be more able to handle risks (ski, motorcycle, etc.) now into my 60's. But looking back, I've seldom have had bad outcomes from these activities. I remember once running late to a Dr.s appointment riding the motorcycle... perhaps having a few "close calls" but meh, no bother... when i arrived and they took my BP, it was actually normal (when it usually runs a little high).
Also autonomy in work has always been important. Having someone step in and distract by directing me to do things a little differently just, YES distracts!
This video was amazing! Thank you for creating this.
Thank you so much! ^^
Wow, that was a very good explanation of how an ADHD-brain works. I recognized me in quite a lot of your examples. I am right now in the process of ADHD-Diagnosis although I'm pretty sure that I suffer from it. In fact, suffered from it for at least the last 25 years, befor that I was somehow still able to get along but then depression started to kick in. Until last year I was struggling without understanding why I couldn't overcome my depression while all physicists told me, it would go away eventually. Then I found a really good psychologist who recognized that my problems perfectly fit with ADHD-symptoms.
ADHD is the explanation for me why I couldn't get better: because the reason for it is still there and untreated.
just discovered your channel. Great video! Love the way you explain things! I've just started trying to pursue content creation after being stuck in mundane and boring jobs. I also love what you said about writing down ideas - things stick better for me when i've physically written them down. I've also started carrying a voice recorder for when I'm driving somewhere and can't write down my ideas - it's been super helpful so far.
I'm writing a book and every time I have some good idea, I'm thinking "no way I forget this, I'll definitely write it down when I get to my laptop".... it NEVER happens! So I am starting to take random notes as my random thoughts occur :D
I do something similar, only I use voice transcription with Google Keep and Google Assistant.
These insights accurately describe my symptoms and affirm my experience. I constantly hope I'm doing "good enough" for the narrative in my brain, my own worst critic. Except for the flashing, which broke my concentration a little bit. Thank you, great summary. I'll subscribe!
I’m 40 and was diagnosed a year ago, although it was evident from primary school that I had ADHD, my main issue is focus.
I run my own business with 122 employees, I find sitting at the computer for more than 20 mins very challenging. I was first prescribed Ritalin, then Dexamphetamine.
I’m slowing lower my dose and getting off it after a year. It certainly assist with my focus, however it fried my brain, I get the identical feeling I got in my 20’s after a weekend on coke, speed or ice.
It can’t be healthy
I can relate to everything you've said. The pills give some new skills (such as focus) but they also take away. I try a lot of different things to cope with my symptoms without meds. I take meds only when I feel very overwhelmed and my mind is all over the place and I sort of feel like I wanna cry out of frustration and feeling helpless. So basically when the pain of all of it is too much, I take my meds for a few days or a week, to calm down, and then continue with my other methods. I sympathize a lot with your experience tho and I hope you find your balance too
Non-stimulant medications like atomoxetine may help. For me they impacted focus and auditory processing but had no effects on stimulation and motivation.
@@asunder1508 Honestly, I've never heard about this one! Thanks for adding value and knowledge! :)
I've read/watched countless books, articles, and videos on the subject, and none of them has been as personally resonant as this eight minute video. Subscribed and very much looking forward to more!
Sometimes it's good to just speak from experience, and a bit of knowledge on the topic. I know I won't make sense to everybody, but I also know that to those who can resonate with me, it will feel nice to know that they're seen and understood. That's really the whole point here. And as much as I'd like to provide useful content, I dont have all the solutions, but I do have the empathy and the desire to offer some help :)
This is an excellent overview of how the lack of dopamine affects our lives. I also love your positive outlook on whats natural for us. Thank you so much❤
I find it much better to accept our brain and find ways to befriend it, instead of fighting and blaming it. I'm glad the message is reaching the right people 💜
Wow… this explains so much… no wonder I can’t stand just sitting there watching mind numbing Tv with friends and family and need to distract myself or get up and move around. Thank you for helping me understand why and how ADHD impacts me and every one who has it.. fantastic video!!!!… Thank You 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️
Thanks for sharing, some of these ADHD stuff sounds so general it's hard to really know if it's actual ADHD or other contributing factors - diet, personality, lack of exercise, lack of low stimulation activities and stillness, too high of levels of dopamine throughout the day such as screen time and video games, lack of developmental character traits like self control or disciplined thought process, etc. Warren Farrell talks about this in his book "The Boy Crisis" and says that many people diagnosed with ADHD who are put on meds just have "inhibited dopamine function" due to other causations listed above. I wish there was an actual brain test instead of looking for symptoms and then diagnosing on something that most people struggle with on a subjective scale that is hard to compare beyond subjectivity. Regardless, I think it's helpful if we recognize that actually having a disorder like this doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it's still helpful with empathy with others and understanding ourselves so we can figure out coping mechanisms to achieve desired behavior and outcomes.
I agree with you! There is an actual brain test, but it's not common to do that. I find it ridiculous - we look at the heart before we diagnose it, but we don't look at the brain before we medicate it.. We have AI now and so much technological progress but we continue to diagnose in this old-fashioned way.. Ah, the lack of common sense sometimes :)
I think I have ADHD. Both my parents were teachers with child managing/engaging skills and had time for me so I did well as a child. They knew to find me activities and let me have alone time and knew how to teach a hyper 4 year old to read so I had reading. I also had various allergies to all processed food so we didn’t eat it. The sleep thing was always a problem. Even when you have adhd I imagine diet exercise and sleep can largely manage it.