Addressing old abandonment triggers in a romantic relationship | The Dr. Cloud Show - Episode 143
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ม.ค. 2025
- In this segment of The Dr. Cloud Show, Dominic wants to know how to get past his fear of abandonment that started with his parents’ divorce. His current romantic relationship is unintentionally triggering him. How can he overcome anxieties around abandonment?
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I experienced emotional abandonment. That's what I call it. My parents were always there physically but emotionally they were not available. So, when I make a friend or if I am in a romantic relationship, or have to ask for help, I feel doubt about if there will still be there, or if I can trust them to help when they said they would. I fear rejection because I didn't bond with my parents. This affects me in other relationships. Jesus is healing me through my relationships with godly people, with my Christian colleagues, with non-Christian people, and with the word of God. I'm better and more outgoing than I used to be, thanks to Jesus. I bought your book, 'Changes that heal'. I look forward to reading it.
Thank you Dominic. Your words had a very deep impact on me. It put me in touch with my own story of abandonment. I’m very untrusting of anyone in any relationship because even before my birth, my parents withheld love and attention. My mom had a udi in place to prevent pregnancy with me. She was told there was a high % of losing me. She couldn’t bond with me because of her fear of losing me and it continued after my birth. She and my father were afraid to spoil me and didn’t respond to my crying or emotional needs for attachment.
I can relate to the caller. My mom abandoned me around age 5. In romantic relationship I’m extremely anxious and fearful the person will leave.
I like having a doctor to listen to, that adds God into the discussion. Thank you.
Job 10:1. Job says he will give full reign to my complaint......make new attachments.....relational connectedness from birth to tomb...is all of life..
Thank you Dr. Cloud. I felt well identified with this story. It is exactly like that to be "abandoned" at 5. I am still strugling with consequencies.
My childhood was shaky, my marriage is shaking, but I’ve got a few friends who’ve been there a while now. And I’m trying to remind myself, that Good has me no matter what happens in my marriage.
6:08 - Doctor.
thank you.
"the wiring"
"there is no past, there's only today"
(& yes, I do understand what you're saying - there Is a past, but right now, Today is what we're dealing with).
Wow.
Again... thank you.
I wanted to say thank you for this specific episode and answering questions because when I was little I definitely had a shakey foundation. My mom has undiagnosed anxiety and possibly PTSD and I was unknowingly subjected to a lot of back and forth abandonment and felt the need to be between my mom and “life” so she didn’t have to suffer emotionally; dad left me when I was born too the exact day…case in point I am now doing a partial inpatient program at a local mental health institution because I cannot handle life anymore or function properly, and it’s helped a lot but I still know I have more work to do. If you or anyone reading this comment could keep me in prayer that would be appreciated as the whole reason I finally am seeking treatment is because I started having really hopeless thoughts that scared me…Thank you for all you do Dr. Cloud! I have a lot of your books and I see you as a blessing to the Body!
Dominic - thanks for sharing!! I have some similar issues so I get it! Hope you are in touch with a great therapist and a great support group and thank you to Dr. Cloud for all the wonderful advice you share from years of experience in the clinical arena. It's so helpful!
I Need A Fondation I realize now!Support System .Thank U Dr.Cloud
This speaks a lot to me. My parents did not physically leave but I learned early on they were not emotionally available and there were a lot of ‘not good enough’ (rejection) issues. I turned 32 Tuesday and am dating for the first time. Working to resolve many of the same issues
Absolutely valid feelings. Absolutely valid reactions and triggers. I'm so proud of you for deep diving your subconscious childhood traumas & fears. 💖 Please know - you are not alone.
And The Mom Factor book. For the guy with early attachment abandonment
11:30 important things of foundation- why wld God who made the world make not being abandoned so important?
I can resonate with you
I want to give you MANY MORE thumbs UP 👍 👌 🙂 😀
Abandonment issues.Dominent ..
💖💖💖
Wow
❤I struggle with separation anxiety as well ❤️🩹 I just keep talking it too Jesus 🙌
I would sometimes get lost in the grocery store, as a child of 3 or 4. As punishment my mom would put and leave me on a busy street corner, and drive away…thinking that would keep me from wandering off in the store…she did this several times. Sometimes she left my older brother there w me. My brother later committed suicide.. when he did, I took up w a childhood friend, who I normally never would have, but did, because of his association to my brother. This conversation opened my eyes to see, not only my unhealthy attachment to my brother, but also my feelings of abandonment, by this man, who convinced me to marry him, and is now leaving (good riddance) but I could not understand until now, why I was having so hard a time detaching from this very toxic relationship. 🫣😭🙌🏻🙏🏻💃🏻