I Quit Being a Therapist!

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 109

  • @MoreAshAndGray
    @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +54

    Let me know about all your exciting job switches in the comments! Stay at home parent is career #3 for me, yay ADHD haha

    • @joeri2499
      @joeri2499 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I quit my (higher paying) full-time job to work for myself. Mainly so I could work from home and less hours. So I could cuddle my dog more 😁 definitively a win

    • @heyyyitskat
      @heyyyitskat 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Currently went from killing myself in retail to nannying and babysitting full time. I have a passion and love for kiddos. I get to provide safe care for the tiny humans while their grownups do what they need to do. Eventually, I’m going to go back to school to get a degree in Early Childhood Education. I’d love to be able to be a Kindergarten teacher 😊

  • @emkassproductions
    @emkassproductions 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +82

    I am a queer therapist working full time independently. It is so impossible to have time and capacity for all of the things. Burn out is REAL and you are super valid in taking care of yourself. It is a hard job to have and pretty impossible to make time for continuing ed and prep. Because it’s never compensated. 😭

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      I’m glad I’m not alone feeling like this! Thanks for being out there at doing the work, we need queer providers! ❤

  • @thebestwillow
    @thebestwillow 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    I've long thought there's some professions that people shouldn't be allowed to work more than three days a week because of the intensity of them and the associated burnout. And now I think about it, yes, they are all helping professions. There's only so much any individual can take emotionally.
    My wife ran a community outreach mental health drop in for about 8 years, in different locations all over the city, four or five days a week. We never discussed the burnout, but now that she's in a different role, (still intense, helping role, but limited to three days a week), she's doing a lot better with life all round, so clearly it was there.

  • @stephenie44
    @stephenie44 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    Having an at-home parent before going to school is amazing. I really appreciated it.

  • @GreenOwlProductions
    @GreenOwlProductions 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +41

    Last year I quit teaching, it was really scary to admit how burnt out I'd gotten. It's nice to see other people talking about taking breaks or changing jobs! But it gave me time to regroup, and I just found out that I've been accepted onto an Educational Psychology Doctorate programme, so things are looking up!

  • @rev.rachel
    @rev.rachel 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Oh my God I feel all of this so much. I’m a pastor, not a therapist, but it’s a similar kind of insanely high emotional load + entirely too overtaxing expectations for the workload + never enough time to actually care for people the way you want. I feel like I never have enough time to rest enough to be present with people. I never have enough time to research how to help folks who are struggling in ways I have no training in. I feel responsible for the folks who have no one else who’s still willing to support them. I want to help everyone who needs therapy get to it, but so many people are terrified or too poor or whatever, and so I see them at their absolute lowest point and have exactly zero of the training they need me to have to actually help them. And then on top of that, I’m constantly criticised for not spending *more* of my time visiting everyone (who doesn’t ask me for a visit) or leading meetings or doing xyz wrong (read: I don’t like this kind of music).
    It’s exhausting and stressful, and frankly the culture of expectations around helping professions borders on abusive. We have got to get to a place as a society where there’s room for these kind of jobs to actually do the work they need to instead of being shackled to the capitalistic efficiency machine.

  • @emersen1543
    @emersen1543 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    I’m in a helping profession too and it can be so exhausting! Burn out is real. Thanks for sharing.

  • @joeri2499
    @joeri2499 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +37

    As an outsider, it seems America has gone way too far with their capitalism. Here, a therapist is an above average paying job (although I can't judge workload), and daycare costs are dependent on your income, so it (should, in theory) be affordable for everyone. Sorry your country puts the wants of the top 1% above the needs of the other 99%.
    Anyway, spending more time with the kids is not a bad thing 😊 i wish you all the best.

    • @idonttan
      @idonttan 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You’re an “outsider”. Worry about your own f’ing country.

  • @leahcay
    @leahcay 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Me, an early childhood educator with a masters, having to quit to stay home because I couldn’t afford to send my child to quality care as I provided quality care for others 🙃

  • @punkmonk9653
    @punkmonk9653 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    Hey Ash! Long-time fan of your channel and also a working licensed counselor from OH. I just wanted to say that I think you're being incredibly respectful of yourself, your profession, your family, and your clients by making this move. And congrats on the Master's!! I also agree that this shit is HARD and also very rewarding. Go you for doing what you think is right for everyone involved. Also I'm fascinated by the fact that you can work unlicensed in your state. We have to do unpaid internships during our master's to get our hours and graduate. That said, OH is one of the most difficult states to get a counseling license in. Glad to see you getting to dig into your creative endeavors again and here's to your slow living era!

  • @dchouk2680
    @dchouk2680 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    Sorry to hear about the autoimmune disorder! I know a lot more people with one now, including myself, who have gotten post-viral/Long Covid conditions including AI disorders (bittersweet because more community, resource sharing, and being taken seriously more often, but also dang, more people with AI disorders). Totally with you on therapist life, the system of therapy is not financially feasible for many people who I feel like would thrive in the position too, it’s a shame.

  • @Ptxlive
    @Ptxlive 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    I’m a NB queer therapist in the UK, and we are totally underpaid! So much emotional and somatic energy used everyday, absolutely exhausting, I feel you! ❤

  • @cassieortiz3067
    @cassieortiz3067 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I love how you respect your own boundaries, and hope for myself to learn to do the same. Helping professions correlate heavily with burnout, and as an RN, i see you. Enjoy the moments while they last! The occupation can be paused for the times we cherish the most. Wish you the best!

  • @allisad7217
    @allisad7217 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I am a Independent hairstylist and although that is not a healthcare profession, but it's definitely a profession where you care for people and listen to their mental health problems all day several times a day. I'm a color specialist so I usually do five colors a day spending 2-3 hours with people at a time.
    No I'm not a therapist, But for some reason people tell their hair stylist everything. It used to be something I really loved about the job but it actually has caused me to burn out quite a bit.
    The things that I do to combat burnout are:
    I take vacation every 3 months, I only work 4 days a week, And I take at least one to two Saturdays off every month. I've been doing this for 12 years so I feel like I've earned that time off. I also have twins and although they are 11 I can't imagine missing time with them because I also think these are my only kids I will ever have.
    Enjoy your time with your kids. It goes by really fast. People always say that but you don't know it until you're experiencing it and looking back at pictures.

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I believe that hear about a lot of people’s thoughts and feelings and provide a ton of emotional care as a hair stylist. Anything where you are “stuck” with someone for a prolonged period of time I feel like folks start to spill emotions. On long flights when I was a flight attendant we called this “jump seat therapy” lol. Also, cute that you also have twins!!

  • @ten_oclock_scholar4690
    @ten_oclock_scholar4690 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Counselor in training here. Totally understand the burnout. Take the time you need. I suspect things will be better when you have school-age kids and don't have to pay for daycare, but you're right, we're not paid near enough during our training period. Agency work is hard, and I look forward to the days when I can have a private practice. Even with a full slate of Medicaid clients, I'd be making $98/hour, which is pretty good.

    • @ten_oclock_scholar4690
      @ten_oclock_scholar4690 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Buttercupz2001 If they're in private practice, sure. It also depends on how much you charge. But getting there is a battle. Thankfully, I knew very well what I was getting into, and like most mental health counselors, I had many reasons to enter the field, none of which had to do with money.

  • @nikkimcintyre9606
    @nikkimcintyre9606 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I’m a therapist in southern Minnesota. Highly sensitive, neurospicy, and queer too. I have felt similarly throughout my career. I am in PP now, which has allowed me to see 3-5 clients per day. Unfortunately the lack of support and pressures of the field burn people out before they can get to the good parts. My thoughts are with you, friend! Hang in. And enjoy those babes. 🥰

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Yay fellow MN providers! Happy you got to a place that allows a balanced client load!

  • @anniebodyhome1999
    @anniebodyhome1999 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    i’m at a pretty different life stage (24, 1 year out of university, looking for work) but super appreciated hearing how work and values are manifesting for you right now! i’m about to finish a contract at my first out-of-uni job, which was 3 days a week and I’m already feeling really burnt out and not excited about potentially needing to go into full time work 🥲 I’m at this weird point of knowing that my neurodivergent brain doesn’t work the best with a 9-5 office job, but also knowing that that is going to be my best shot at actually being financially secure for the first time 😅
    glad you’re able to take your time to do whats feeling best for you! and to be there with the kiddos!
    sidenote; if you reach your patreon goal and hire an editor, if you’re lookin for someone new I may know someone who is currently looking for work 👀 haha

  • @lloroshastar6347
    @lloroshastar6347 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    This is just a supportive comment to say I'm glad you were able to feel safe enough to return to TH-cam after everything that happened. I wish you happiness for your immediate and long term future.

  • @MossyBear
    @MossyBear 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    This is wildly similar to my experience. I'm in my early 30's and worked on and off as a LMHCA until I just decided to relinquish my credentials this year. I started my master's program while I was working full time, during the first quarter of my (online thank god) program, I developed my autoimmune disease. I became house-bound quite literally overnight and stayed that way for a few months before I could get diagnosed and medicated. (an extremely lucky timeline all things considered). At my highest capacity for working as a therapist, I was still in my internship. I worked 8 hour days managing a case load of 24 adult men who were charged with a crime, but not yet in a mental state that would allow them to proceed with trial. It absolutely burnt me out, as did the locations I worked with after graduation. At my lowest, I was seeing only 12 clients a week, and it was still too much on my body.
    Congrats on "retiring" from your job as a therapist, from another 4.0 GPA non-binary ex-therapist

  • @cozycammy927
    @cozycammy927 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    music therapist here to say THANK YOU for making this. i lasted about 3 years working full time before i had to quit. i dont have kids or a need for childcare yet but i'm glad i'm not the only one who couldn't deal with needing 5-6 clients a day, on top of paperwork and supervision and professional development. i'm about 3 weeks into a full time mental health break and my "slow living" era and it was so worth it. i'm taking the time to figure out how to build a private practice that feels sustainable and in line with my own ethics and values around caregiving. helping professionals tend to get taken advantage of a lot and we just cannot provide quality or ethical services if we're constantly overworking ourselves just to make ends meet.
    i've been watching your channel since i was a freshman in high school - i'm so glad to hear how happy you are now. 😊❤

  • @RowanLowden-qs5bl
    @RowanLowden-qs5bl 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thanks for sharing. I’m a teacher and struggling with burnout, I need to quit and take care of myself

  • @arimckellin1
    @arimckellin1 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm a psych major in undergrad and want to do school counseling (as in mental health) for high schools or maybe a college. I'm nervous about the journey with burnout and pay and (honesty) paperwork. But I am passionate about mental health and loved my Clinical Psych course

  • @KassParish
    @KassParish 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Went to college to become a counselor, was in my final year of my bachelor's in psych when I realized just how exhausting being a counselor was gonna be and decided to go a different direction (still finding that direction tbh). I don't think people understand just how much energy and mental exertion it takes to be a good caring therapist. Good on you for doing what you need to do to take care of yourself and your kids.
    (Also I am so sorry but I gotta shoot my shot: when you hit that patreon goal and can hire an editor, if you don't already have an editor picked out, consider this me putting my hat in the ring lol)

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Oh cool! I have someone in mind already, but it’s always good to have another person for other jobs! Send me an email at ash@hardellmedia.com with some of your work? :)

    • @KassParish
      @KassParish 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@MoreAshAndGray Sent!

  • @bottledutopia
    @bottledutopia 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm only a few minutes in but thoughts are coming up. I started working on my PhD in 2018. Then the pandemic hit. Trying to work on my PhD during a pandemic, far away from my elderly parents and the rest of my family and worrying about their wellbeing constantly, was too much. I ended up eventually leaving with a masters degree, and now I'm not working in my field. I graduated a year ago, and I am still burned out to oblivion. I wish I could get people to understand how serious burnout is so that they could avoid it themselves. Quitting is okay. Not hustling is okay. Not daydreaming about a career is okay.

  • @SmartAsAggie
    @SmartAsAggie 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    LMSW here! I’m super fortunate to work at a great community mental health center. There are so many reasons I will continue working at a CMHC… get paid for all hours worked whether it is therapy, training, continuing education, supervision, meetings, staffing, and even when clients cancel or don’t show. I also love the variety of work between different types of folks, individual and family therapy, crisis and assessments. The CMHC I work for in a County agency, so great government benefits. I also work on a team and always have others to staff clients with. Just a few of the reasons I’ll never go into private practice.

  • @marynguyen3532
    @marynguyen3532 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My lucky self stumbled across such good quality content. Feeling less lost with your insight

  • @A_Araki_
    @A_Araki_ 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    Therapist here. I'm also recovering from a pretty serious burnout. Unlike you I didn't stop when I should have, and had some concerning consequences. Just compleated 2 months os recovery, and I'm enjoying work again. I'm really glad to hear that you are taking your time and enjoying life. The good part is that you've learnt where your work limit is and you're spending meaningfull time with your kiddos! Keep living one day at a time. Whenever you're ready, your patients will be lucky to have you as their therapist! Can't wait to watch your next video!

  • @amberthest
    @amberthest 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for sharing! I'm in school for my bachelors of social work right now. No idea what I'll actually do when I graduate as far as earning enough to survive, but, alas, I'm doing my best. Starting to find other trans social workers/students, though, which is extra important to me as a Tennessean. Social workers have an ethical responsibility to practice self care, so nothing but solidarity for you as you take a break from practice. I'm so glad you get to spend more time with your kids

  • @user-hl9vu6ij2r
    @user-hl9vu6ij2r 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Helping professional here and I hear you!!!! ❤️

  • @NvmTheJoy
    @NvmTheJoy 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This reminds me of a coworker I had when I was a server. He pulled double-shifts almost every day because he and his co-parent couldn't afford childcare. Everyone they knew needed to work full time, so family and friends couldn't help. Ironically, this means he hardly saw his kid.

  • @Jinxer28
    @Jinxer28 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is super relatable as a former therapist. I got my Masters in social work and my first job out of school was a dual therapist and case manager role with an LBGTQ center- it seemed like a really great way to get my supervision hours, but I got massively burnt out within a couple of months (though primarily from the case management side). I just felt like it was impossible to provide the level of quality services I wanted to provide to my clients with such a high case load. I ended up switching to working in higher ed, doing DEI, community-building, and basic needs work supporting students, and I really love the work environment! Jury is still out on if I will return to therapy some day- the work is so close to my heart, but my burnout experience really took a toll.

  • @lydiakies9053
    @lydiakies9053 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I could totally see you working with/for a school district. You're an amazing resource. I'm sure you'll find your spot.

  • @Harrison_J_T
    @Harrison_J_T 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Yes about helping professions! I burnt out so badly in healthcare in a clerical role. I also have two autoimmune conditions and other chronic illnesses. I am in university for a degree for a clinical healthcare role but plan once graduated to only do the job the way it works for me. If i can't find that in a normal full time role then i will do temp/angency work, especially as there is a shortage of the people in the role i'm in so theyre always be agency vacancies (also, as is often the case, agency tends to pay better). No job is worth my health and wellbeing

  • @jw844
    @jw844 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    omg I have been doing similar things with my masters scores currently and 'compensating' for an actually fine undergrad. Thanks for sharing these perspectives and ideas!

  • @drewharris7785
    @drewharris7785 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    So not in the same league as what you are doing (dang you're amazing) but I'm having a tiny bit of stress right now that before literally yesterday I was not willing to acknowledge as valid. So, I'm valid and you're valid and you're awesome for taking the steps you need to. Go you!

  • @noaho.3233
    @noaho.3233 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’m an MSW student right now and a lot of these things are what I’m afraid of - being disabled and neurodivergent too I have a hard time seeing how I will handle seeing 7/8 clients a day in community mental health and still be able to provide the quality of services I believe in. I just keep assuming that things are going to fall into place but I know I do really need to start thinking about what kind of work I will be able to pair with what kind of lifestyle. Thank you for sharing your experience!

  • @mfulling8573
    @mfulling8573 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My mom just finished her master's last may in clinical health counseling (or something). She's working at a Jail currently as a mental health counselor, they provide her with all of her supervision hours and contact hours. Of course as a county employee she gets a salary along with this, benefits etc. And it's not a terrible wage, by any means. She started at 75k and now that she's out of probably I like 83k? Ish. At first was working five 8 hour shifts. After she got out of her supervision phase she's on four 10 hour shifts. She opened a private practice and does that on her Monday off! Maybe you should look for something similar to this? Also hospitals always need therapists/counselors and typically provide a decent salary with benefits. Maybe look around there. See if it would be a better fit? My mom also disliked working in a private practice where she basically experienced all of what you talked about.

  • @darkskinisalwaysin
    @darkskinisalwaysin 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The burnout in this profession is real, and because of it I’m on a semi-permanent hiatus. At times, I question if I will ever return back to being a counselor/therapist and it’s just not there. Maybe I’ll be back much later in my life, maybe not. Thank you for your transparency, very much appreciated.

  • @verychilladrian
    @verychilladrian 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for this video! I’m interviewing with master’s programs now, and this is helpful to consider when making my decision to start a program. I’m an lgbt care coordinator now and work closely with therapists. I love doing intakes and helping people with care plans, and so I’ve become interested in wanting to get credentialed in counseling to provide direct mental health care to lgbt clients. But I’ve been suffering in the work force for 10 years now and am hoping to invest in an education and license that will provide some form of stability, and the ability to have kids and financially support that. Again thank you for sharing your experience! As a note, keep an eye out for jobs at virtual therapy platforms.

  • @Kbroadd1
    @Kbroadd1 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    We were actually just talking last night about this amongst some of the ladies in my local union (IBEW) and how those of us with kids paid to work until our kids were school aged. Most people when they start as an apprentice if they have worked any appreciable time before take a pay cut the first year or two. If you add child care on top of this, things are especially rough, financially. Parenting has its own special seasons of burnout, so having a job that isn't mentally breaking me (that's a whole separate topic in itself) is crucial.

    • @Kbroadd1
      @Kbroadd1 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Adding that in my case I knew within a couple of years my pay would dramatically increase in an already contractually obligated way was the only thing that really made that a viable option. Making this huge change in my 40s was scary but also amazing, and it has made me a better mother and has given me the ability to give my kid more than I could have otherwise.
      Wage theft is rampant in the US, as you noted with several examples. Employers are almost never held accountable and they don't seem to care about the huge impact it employers are almost never held accountable and they don't seem to care about the huge impact it has on their own industry and bottom line much less the well-being of their employees and those employees' families.
      I hope that when the time is right for you Ash that if you choose to go back to work as a therapist that it is on your own terms. We have a saying on the job site, "make your own conditions" and you certainly are and should feel immensely proud of that.

  • @HandmadeKatie
    @HandmadeKatie 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Twin daycare is no joke!! But being home has given me the freedom to build a different career. One that doesn’t pay as well (or cost as much), but lets me do more for the folks who need it with sliding-scale pricing.

  • @carlygee8866
    @carlygee8866 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I got my MSW and have been working as a therapist or rather school social worker the last 3 years and this January got my license finally but now having a 9 month old I'm feeling the burn out and super relate to this

  • @panick_9550
    @panick_9550 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    As a studying therapist (im still working on my bachlors) and also as a queer and gender non conforming person i want to say thank you for this information for future reference. Ive looked up to you since i was still in the closet 10 years ago (a few month's before I came out).

  • @FlyToTheRain
    @FlyToTheRain 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is really well timed for me. I'm an elementary teacher attempting to finish up my master's degree this school year. I've fallen behind on some work because of some health issues, almost certainly caused by the stress of going back to school on top of an already high stress job. I've been trying to catch up all school year, spent spring break not resting at all, and I've recently begun to feel like I'm not competent at my job or a good teammate to my fellow grade level teachers. I actually cried during a team meeting a couple of weeks ago and I don't think I'll ever not feel embarrassed about it. There was an opportunity for me to switch positions and return to an area that I felt more confident in, but the district staff messed up the posting and it actually ended up being a position that I'm not qualified for. I like the school I work at, the people I work with, and my principal, so I don't want to go find a new job at a different school entirely, but I am feeling not the most excited about continuing in my current job. Anyway I think I meant to connect to something I heard you say in the video but ended up rambling instead, thanks for sharing your experience. In a way I think it helps to know I'm not the only one.

  • @Kaalyn_HOW
    @Kaalyn_HOW 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think you'd love the work of charity organization Beauty After Bruises. They provide - among many other things - therapy access to complex childhood trauma survivors. They also support therapists where possible. They also a ton of public education/etc on trauma and therapy.

  • @HTTYDinHeaven
    @HTTYDinHeaven 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I really wanted to work with kids and be a childcare practitioner - I did a co-op and volunteered at a daycare, I applied for related jobs, I tried getting an apprenticeship... But at the end of the day, I just. Do not have the literal physical energy to work a full day of daycare, nevermind doing it every day of the week. I'm still not really at peace with it, and I haven't been able to figure out where I go from here, especially since the energy issue is a problem for any job, not just childcare.

  • @caelanreid7884
    @caelanreid7884 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Yay capitalism 😅 thanks for sharing this Ash, childcare is so expensive and it sucks that most folx end up making less by working

  • @SlugcatEmporium
    @SlugcatEmporium 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Man I feel unobservant, I forgot you were a therapist!
    I hope things get more bearable for you 🖤 you deserve peace.

  • @Agpals
    @Agpals 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Fellow therapist here too x) Burn out in our field is SO common, there are so many days where I'm like "oh jeez how am I gonna be THE BEST therapist I can be?" All the stuff you said is so true between the THOUSANDS of hours for licensure, the NCE, supervision it's like non stop.
    I'm so proud you found something that works for you!! Do you ever want to go full private practice some day in the future?
    Also I'm curious your theory you use hehe :)

  • @Legocat143
    @Legocat143 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! loved this vid it’s been awhile since ive watched you but this was a wonderful video so thank you

  • @laurenelysewalters
    @laurenelysewalters 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Hi! I’m a full time therapist. To be honest, I learned early on that I would not be able to adequately research for appointments. I sneak in a bit here and there on lunch breaks or at the beginning/end of the day. It doesn’t align with my values but I also feel providing the best care I can is better than leaving the field for myself.

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      This is so real! I struggled with this too. There is such a shortage in providers, which means that right now, a caring therapist who is not 100% competent is still way better than no one. I had a bit of guilt around this when I chose to leave.

  • @aleksandraklimek3996
    @aleksandraklimek3996 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Queer palliative care nurse with a one year old here and OOOFFFF do I feel you. Sometimes I feel like I’m barely hanging in there, but really financially, but bc of my energy levels. I feel like I’m not giving 100% to my patients when I’m at work and not being the best parent I can be for my little one when I’m at home. I’m thinking of making some changes career wise to make it work better with my personal life but money and capitalism have me in a chokehold 😭😭

  • @thebestwillow
    @thebestwillow 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You're right about the kids. There's so much changing with them right now. Babies and toddlers are particularly amazing. Perhaps plan for going back to therapy when the kids start full time school? In the last couple of years before they do, they will need your attention a lot less than they do now, and you could potentially use that spare time and headspace to catch up on research and developments you've missed, so you'll be less rusty when you go back to working.

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      That is kinda what I’m thinking! Maybe even 1-2 years slower, cause I’m very much embracing this “slow living” thing. But yes!

  • @-shenanigans.
    @-shenanigans. 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Oof, can relate to the perfectionism and imposter syndrome. I maintained a 4.0 after I went back to school for nursing, because I thought I might want to go to graduate school someday and needed to bring up my "abysmal" 3.1 GPA from my first bachelors degree. 10+ years working in the field and I can barely get myself to shower or eat, let alone think about graduate school. Not worth it at all. The 4.0 or running myself into the ground for a decade. The burnout is no joke!
    Proud of you for taking care of yourself and taking a step back. I need to figure out a way to do something similar and reassess my whole life. It's really difficult when I have to keep working though, because I like things like food, housing, and healthcare. Stupid capitalism.

  • @jenniferhannacharles6126
    @jenniferhannacharles6126 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm training to be a clinical psychologist in India, I've around 8 to 12 hours of clinical work everyday which I'm supposed to do along with academics, thesis, assignments and case submissions, read for specific clients. I'm beyond burnt out. Taking a break is a great decision!

  • @nael_tm
    @nael_tm 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    omg looove your jacket (so off topic hahaha but I like your and Gray's clothing style)

  • @ibejimi
    @ibejimi 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I work as a independent private practitioner and I work entirely remotely so I can only need about 11 clients a week over 3 days a week to make enough to live but I am also blessed to have a very cheap life. My max is 18 a week but my goal is to get to a steady 15 which should pay me enough to be less stressed

  • @treefrog101
    @treefrog101 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Therapy and Language Interpreting jobs are hard to make a living off of. I was an interpreter and it's emotional labor. Ever since I have stopped interpreting, I have said "I would go back if I had UBI". There is no way I can provide my best and honest work if I am struggling to eat and house myself.

  • @boyanak1969
    @boyanak1969 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Can absolutely validate the. Challenges in work life balance!! I have gotten lucky with my private practice agency that I work in values self care and personal values as well as professional. I have also the benefits of making my schedule the way I want to which means I work Tuesday-Friday with 5 clients a day and Friday being a work from home day. It works best with my needs. As far as continuing education I look for webinars and podcasts that I can have playing the background or read a book on a treadmill.

    • @boyanak1969
      @boyanak1969 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Oh also I schedule breaks when I know I need them. Ex: 3 in the morning 2 in the afternoon

    • @carlygee8866
      @carlygee8866 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      omg that sounds like an amazing opportunity I'm a therapist and work M-F 8 to 4 in person =/

    • @boyanak1969
      @boyanak1969 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@carlygee8866 it's so good im not gonna lie! Much needed

  • @soccercool13
    @soccercool13 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I didn’t know you became a therapist! Totally feel you. Capitalism is fricken brutal. I’m in school to be a therapist right now and live in constant fear of burnout.

  • @laurenelysewalters
    @laurenelysewalters 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Did you look into salaried positions at all? There are community mental health and a few private practices that do salary so you get paid for all your work.

  • @thetransmission9625
    @thetransmission9625 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I work in community mental health as a licensed counselor. It’s difficult work with high case loads, but it is salary and benefits. I like the work I do though often am stretched thin. It’s not a ton of money, but it’s currently enough to live on (with dual income no kids that is…). The one part I hate is hiding my queerness. I have no choice in my clients, so I often have to work with people who do not have the kindest views on queer people. It works well enough for me right now. It’s consistent, stable work haha

  • @ashlikefrompokemon4327
    @ashlikefrompokemon4327 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm in grad school currently to get my master's in clinical mental health counseling, and I'm already dreading the practicum and internship process. I already have 3 jobs just to afford to live, and so then to work another 20 hours a week of difficult emotional work unpaid?!? I love this field with my whole heart but it's criminal how underpaid we are

  • @TheRedlotusblossom
    @TheRedlotusblossom 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Honestly it makes sense I wouldn't go back to work until your kids at school. You could work during their school day and not have to pay anyone for watching them because they're supposedly getting an education. Although considering how dangerous public schools are I don't know if that's a good thing or not maybe you should homeschool or private school then. That's the main reason I don't want kids in the first place on LGBT and I don't want my kid to get hurt just because of that and honestly given this day and time the likelihood of them getting hurt is higher than them not getting hurt so.

  • @SomeHearts310
    @SomeHearts310 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Long term (10+ years) PhD level gender affirming specialized therapist here, these issues are very common with interns. I work with so many supervisees about this because you can’t do all the things and trying to do so isn’t considerate to you or clients. This career isn’t for everyone and it does take time to find your flow, on average around 20-25 client contact hours a week is full time. Anyways, for what it’s worth I think that if you ever decided to go back to work this is definitely something you could and should work on in supervision during your internship! I’m sure it would help as you get more and more experienced and learn your rhythm.

  • @jennifers5560
    @jennifers5560 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Sold my business last year and was looking forward to some time off to figure out what my next thing will be. Just got offered a consulting job by the same company that bought our company. Looks like I’m staying in the same industry…😮

  • @rainbowtropolis
    @rainbowtropolis 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I sure wish people who take any profession that is caregiver/customer service should be paid quite a lot more. They're first line helpers, and they get dumped on the most for workloads and unfair labor practices. Yea, capitalism isn't great for those carrying the brunt of society.
    I'm happy to hear you took a break to be with the kiddos, that would have made a great difference in my life as a kid if my parents would have been there for me growing up. (I know they did the best they could in the late 70's early 80's with what was available, plus they had their own mental and physical limitations as well.)
    Taking care of yourself helps you take care of your family, I'm slowly learning that for myself. I don't have a job (disabled due to autoimmune stuff), but I take care of my close elderly friends where I live. They tell me things that break my heart, so I'm unofficially their therapist in a very offhanded way. They think they're too old to be worthy of help (therapy and such, as well as not being able to use or even have a computer; let alone get to an appointment if they had one in the first place)
    The system is broken, and people who genuinely care pick up the slack because of big hearts and the drive to help.
    Enjoy your time with your kids, they'll appreciate it more than I could ever explain in a short comment 😊

  • @eccentricninny0120
    @eccentricninny0120 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    omg i missed you, i was talking about you on my lesbian cousin... i am giving her some people who can influence her in a good way.. or kinda help her to be a better person.. being LGBTQ++++ in our place is still something which is frowned upon... i am sorry if i am being out of topic here .. i am just happy to see you again

  • @mamamia2632
    @mamamia2632 7 วันที่ผ่านมา

    This profession is not built to be flexible. It is most lucrative and doable if you are married without young children. Especially during the period that you are operating with your limited license, it is expected that you work as if you have no other commitments, so it helps if you actually do not have any other commitments. The reason why I say it works best if you are married is because, in private practice especially, it is unlikely that you are going to have sufficient benefits. It is really hard to make a living if you actually need all of the things a job is supposed to offer.

  • @Grace_Psychology
    @Grace_Psychology 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I am also doing my practicum!

  • @laurenelysewalters
    @laurenelysewalters 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You could also always do part time therapy through contract work!! You can do as little as 5 clients a week :)

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I think this is a little harder when you are still under supervision…I could be wrong though!

    • @laurenelysewalters
      @laurenelysewalters 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@MoreAshAndGray ah that’s probably true! Because then you’d probably have to pay for your own supervision. You could look into Thriveworks or Lifestance, I believe they take part time LPCs and provide supervision. Some of my professors from grad school also offered free supervision for alumni so you could ask some that you have a good relationship with!

  • @casperTheBird
    @casperTheBird 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Question for the comments: My dream was to get a masters in clinical social work and do private practice therapy, but everyone seems to be struggling? Is this a pipe dream? I dont want to do it, if it means giving up on the rest of my life to do it. Is anyone doing this and living a relatively comfortable life?

  • @janellama420
    @janellama420 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Due to my severe ptsd I cant hold any too stressful job. I drive for lyft which is also very bad on my ptsd. I'd much rather make art. specifically music and videos. like on my channel. i have footage and ideas for movies im working on. capitalism makes it all so very difficult. also I'm a Trans woman in texas. im on a big ass struggle buss with no real way to fund therapy. should be oregon bound in a couple months tho... so theres that. i just miss my daughter..

  • @sourisdebibliotheque
    @sourisdebibliotheque 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You should do a collab with Cinema therapy channel! I would like to listen you talk with Jono!

  • @Nobody-dp5xo
    @Nobody-dp5xo 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What does your partner do? I can imagine all the juggling with obs and wee kiddo'. I got burnt out in front line mental health and that was without any children. Your kids are lucky you seem like a fun lovely parent. :-D

  • @brendan6567
    @brendan6567 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    thank god.. to the benefit of everyone else, this person absolutely looks like the worst therapist ever, patients dont deserve to be harmed like that by these disgusting people

  • @hannahrosereviews5073
    @hannahrosereviews5073 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Why not bring on one or two free clients during this break? That way you don't become rusty.

  • @stephenie44
    @stephenie44 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Don’t provide therapy when you’re burntout. It’s too easy to harm people.

    • @stephenie44
      @stephenie44 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thanks for making a video about it, it’s so important.

  • @blairelliott
    @blairelliott 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Interesting....

  • @toboroboproductions
    @toboroboproductions 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Curious as to whether or not they’re implying TH-cam makes them more money then being a counselor with a masters degree 😭

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Oh haha, probably maybe for some people, NOT for me though lol

  • @smudge8882
    @smudge8882 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Please don't blame yourself for developing an autoimmune disease! People don't talk about this, but it's very common to develop autoimmune disorders after a pregnancy. That's the reason why autoimmune disorders are significantly more common in women than men, given how women are significantly more likely to get pregnant.

    • @MoreAshAndGray
      @MoreAshAndGray  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Oh wow! Thanks for letting me know this! I got mine before pregnancy. But I still appreciate the grace around encouraging me not to blame myself ❤

  • @aleciahodge6876
    @aleciahodge6876 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    FIRST ❤❤❤