@@anonygent Oh, it wasn't really drama, he was just a jackass New Zealander who pretended to have a sense of empathy in order to project his insecurities onto people
Just the kind of scurrilous, anti-imperialist despot propaganda I’ve come to expect from the this channel. I’ve been tortured by His Majestic Awesomeness twice and both times I’ve found him to be charming, professional and, within the limits of our circumstances, a true gentleman!
Don't worry emperor, give them 20-30 years and after your passing they will go "hell sure he was not crystal clear but at least there was peace" and 200 years later historians will go "uniting process was painful, and there were some troubles in the beginning but it created our country so in the grand scheme of things it was acceptable"
@@jameschambers9969 Oh please: "of course what happened was sad, tragic even, but we cannot judge the emperor on the basis of our current day morality, those were different times, and standards were not the same as today"
Zahak the Serpent King from Iranian mythology, who used to feed people's brain to the two serpents sprounting from his shoulder actually asked his advisors and random petitioners whether the people loved him.
@@Lichelf no. And in fact one hated him so much that even after the king agreed to not sacrifice his last son to his snake shoulders when he tried to get the peasant to sign s paper saying he was a good king the peasant ripped it up in front of him and walked out while everyone was to stunned to stop him
That's different kind of emperor, who doesn't want to be loved, probably not understanding the concept. He wanted poppulations to be afraid, opposition to be destroyed and knew, how to be loved - that was his major trick, how he became emperor. He was the Hero politician honestly adored by many of the inhabitants of the Empire, the most poppular chancelor and politician. He had those loving him, even when he started with slavership and eliminated the senate. Women loved him as chancelor and as emperor.
@notaspider4084 No, nerd. Ok, it was a good joke, but he looks like almost every dark lord, they are similar, because they are dark lords of fantasy. Palpatine mainly cackles when he is victorious or hurt, doesn't matter. It's interesting character, but not all Star Wars is good in general and has just good political side - reflects something esentially american. Sorry, I have seen it as adult, so my view could be different and I see rather the dark lords of my childhood as the one in the video. It's really ok, that you see Palpatine.
It's cool, he'll just buy it in a move that clearly won't upset anyone or be a clear blatant response to federal judges holding the emperor responsible for their tweets.
@@whom382 He could first reform it, so it may serve the course, for a while, and delite it later, for God's sake, in which ever God you believe. We don't effin care.
"And Steve! Make sure to put the purple crystal that contains 95% of my power on a lone pedastal in the middle of a large, empty room. And make it float." "But sire isn't that just inviting theft?" "Do not question me Steve! Or I shall dangle you precariously over a pit of flaming snakes! For like....three hours!"
"Place my strongest lieutenants along the path. But make sure the weakest ones are first, so that the hero can become increasingly more skilled with each battle." "Sir, we can just have all your lieutenants in the same-" "Do not question me! Each one must be slightly more difficult than the last or those who oppose me will have no chance!"
Oh man... the fact that I INSTANTLY understood what the emperor wanted when he first said that the people might throw him a parade... I have been fully trained by corporate.
@@emblemblade9245 No, but stuff like "the CEO is visiting us here at the Dallas office next month; I heard that when he visited the Charlotte office last year the staff there made him a cake and named a puppy after him and he loved it, so..." is real.
Don’t forget when he survives an absolutely impossible situation, becoming the villain several decades later, making a character’s noble sacrifice completely meaningless
@@BurgerSoup "are you ever going to explain how that happened?" "no" "is anything our heroes do consequential to the story?" "not really" "why does any of it happen?" "Because lightsabres and explosions and hey look over there!"
Atleast it's better than having the main character who was shown to be the most kind and forgiving person suddenly becoming the biggest f*cking doechebag because of something they did that was completely out of character.
Just remember: the bad guy rules the realm for years of opulence and self-indulgence, and is only toppled in the last few minutes of the climax. It's not a bad deal, all things considered. Sure, the final 10 minutes or so may suck, but it might be worth it for decades of wealth and power.
Emperor is evil! -How? - He killed a dozen of his nephews! - Those rich bastards who would never gave me a time of day? Oh I just weep for them. - He created massive army. - Security yes, we are very secury, noticed how many barbarian raids there were on us ? Grand total of 0. Also my brother serves in the army, great pay, and chances of promotion. - he rules with iron fist! - administration works very efficiently agreed.
Just spend your limitless resources to sneak away and reitre right before it gets bad. Or negotiate with the heroes and offer them everything if they let you escape. It's a deal they can't refuse and it gets you out of trouble.
It's excellent. The only thing is that (having only seen the movies, at least) I've never really gotten the impression that Palpatine cares at all about what the average citizens think of him.
I loved that. All Hail the Beloved Emperor, Alasdair Beckett-King, First of His Name, Dark Lord of the Sith, Twisted Usurper of the Throne, Squasher of Nephews, Scourge of the Nibleboners, Ruler of all Helgasund. Long May He Reign!
At least he knows his reign will be secure. It wasn't easy tracking down all 12 nephews, but he managed it, by gum. And now, a grateful people willingly enshrine his portrait over all their mantlepieces.
@@jazzy4830 loool ah yes the nieces- he forgot about them! they will be united- until they aren't. But until then- may Lord Red Palpatine beware. He may never see the Niece Brigade coming.
Too bad one of his minions tasked with killing one of the nephew's found out that the nephew had a newborn child which the minion proceeded to take in as his own child.
Ten thousand men slaughtered in a single battle - Ok, hire a good song writer, remember something bombastic and catchy! - But sire, we have killed all those people, burned cities - Trust me it will be awesome, also make another one, something simple that soldiers can sing, you know basic but fun. -No one will sing it. -Trust me, they will, also remember we need a good painter, our forces must be shown in the light and enemies in darkness, you know classic "we are children of light" kind of stuff.. I can see it, hundreds of years from now people will be reading adventure books about it.
I love it that people can make films where one actor plays all the parts! Add excellent green screen technology and it looks REAL! The only real limit is a person’s skill and creativity.
@@gekkenhuisje - I agree! I grew up before the internet, and I was an early internet user (I was a programmer). I thought the internet would be an unmitigated “good”, but I was wrong. However, things like this tip the internet towards “good”. Fortunately, the internet is still evolving, so we’ll see whether it fulfills its promise of uniting the world and letting people understand each other better. Who knows?
You know what would make the parade even more spontaneous? Someone that's lost their family to the empire finding a small misfit group of friends and trying to overthrow the emperor.
For what it's worth, I'd imagine an evil emperor would be loved, primarily, by the people they enable. You see, when you take over an Empire you now have evil minions. These minions are people you allow and encourage to indulge their most sadistic impulses, and they'll appreciate that even if you aren't especially nice to them. This is why your evil empire should use skulls and spikes frequently, because it's great advertising for the kind of person who'd wanna serve your evil empire.
Surveys should that 77% of minions who cited "skulls and skull imagry" "Healthy workplace enviroment" "Opportunities for Torture" or "quick promotion" as reasons for joining His Majestys Dark Forces rate the level of beheaded orphans displayed on the battlements as "insufficiant".
That's all well and good, but I was hoping to have my back a little less stabbed and the rivers a little less burned when I voted the Emperor and his Squash All Nephews Party into supreme power. And I never thought he was gonna squash MY nephews as well!
IKR? Did anyone even love Biden or Whore Kamala who no one voted for in 2020 nor to be the candidate in 2024? Not even Dems on the stage in 2020 loved either. But now they are out and the people have spoken and things will return to normal! Whew! We dodged that bullet the 2nd time.
To take this seriously for a moment, thats kinda what the chinese government is doing. "Allow" people sometimes to speak openly just so you can make a list who to "deal with later" or simply black mail them to be used as spies later. And that way they can delete certain comments while leaving others, e.g when Russia invaded Ukraine Chinese censorship deleted all negative online comments leaving only positive pro invasion ones left, making it seem as if the public universally agrees with what ever the state is doing or saying. The Soviets controlled through this means all of society, by for one making most people believe its only them who is unhappy with the state of things and on the other hand make them afraid of speaking out or risk it being recored/listened by the wrong people or that one of your frinds who is unhappy has been forced to spy on you after getting caught themselves. Its suprising how easy it is actually to controll a society that way
He's just the latest in a long line of advisers, the last of whom was beheaded yesterday. Nothing personal, just tying up loose ends. Can't have the people's loyalty divided, you know.
There have been many Steves. Or one Steve with many faces. But, one thing is known: Steve is the Emperor's most loyal acolyte. Wherever the Emperor goes, there, following behind, ready to serve His Imperial Majesty's edicts, er, commands, er, needs, that's it, goes Steve.
Give it 500 years and the people will be like "emperor evilinus the first, founder of our nation and national symbol. Make sure kids learn about him and his personal life in school!"
Sure, he is responsible for half of the countries population dying, almost destroyed the already fragile economy twice, and tortured children. But he was the first, and you should respect him.
"It will be the biggest parade; people will come to me with tears in their eyes and say, Sir, we never thought a parade could be so big, your parade numbers are through the roof! They never thought a big parade could be so big, but that's what happens when the people love you, your numbers go through the roof!"
Let me tell you folks, the love I get from the incredible people out there is just tremendous, believe me. They love me like nobody's ever been loved before, it's really something.
Well, I thought I’d try to write some witty comment, but instead; I’ll just take the easy route and read the comments.. The community’s pretty awesome here, always making me laugh even more after watching the videos from one of my favourite content creators.
Meanwhile, God Emperor Leto Atreides II: "For a thousand generations, all of mankind will depise me for what I am about to do, but even so, it is necessary."
The Emperor who unites ends up hated, but no one dares question his rules When his grandson rules, memories have faded and the imperial structure is well-built so the Empire can last It's during the second generation than an Empire is actually the most fragile
It's 3 am and i'm suffering a major bout of severe depression... getting myself drunk, i stumbled across this video by one of my favourite comedians... It made me laugh out loud and very loud at that... which isn't good since i've been living in a hotel for the last 4 months... but IS good because i needed the laugh...
To quote the Emperor Caligula: "Oderint dum metuant." Let them hate, so long as they fear. Mind you, he was done in by his own bodyguard, so you can take this too far.
when the sane have to live through another "extraordinary popular delusion and the madness of crowds" as Charles Mackay was observing some two centuries ago, it is this kind of comedy that makes it worthwhile!!! thank you so much for jump-starting another day!!!
gotta do some rebranding. It's not we've burnt your rivers and forced you to march in a parade, it's we've made the land more suitable for exciting new developments and we're conducting fun (but still mandatory) team-building exercises.
i love the twist were he people came to remember his as one of the greats, sure he burned some rivers and was a bit of a diva but he did unite the lands and stabilize the echonomy and streamline the healthcare system... oh and he made the brothels state owned to improve working conditions
Steve: Emperor, the people have finally granted you your dues! A procession heads this way now, unto thy castle. Emperor: Ah, splendid! Splendid! Perhaps they have finally come to recognize my resplendence. What have they written upon their banners? No doubt acclamations of delight at my name. Steve: No. Emperor: No? Steve: Pitchforks and torches, actually. And they have an effigy of you set up upon the town square. Come look! Emperor: * follows him to the window * Steve, you fool of a took!! I see no effigy! Only a mere bonfire with a long, wooden stick being tended to by a man in a black hood.
1:00 "My name's not Steve." "Steve . . ." lol. Reminds me of the dialog between Handsome Jack and one of his minions in Borderlands 2: "Anything else on today's agenda, Jimmy?" "The name's 'Jeffrey' sir. And no." "Thanks, Jimmy!"
I always wondered why some people want to rule the world/galaxy/multiverse; the thought of having to deal with all that bureaucracy and paperwork gives me a headache.
To be fair, anyone who takes stuff over has at least a few hundred die-hard fans. "The guy started from nothing, rose to power, and killed all the younglings! That takes GUMPTION."
To be fair, if the Emperor was able to "burn" the rivers, probably nobody needed to be drinking whatever was in them.
What was burning the rivers supposed to achieve anyway?
@@felipecosta-kv2fx Gotta flush the beavers somehow...
@@JM-mh1pp what's wrong with them beavers?
@@felipecosta-kv2fx they know...they know...
@@felipecosta-kv2fx Getting rid of fecal matter, oil and microbes, just like Chicago did to its river, accidentally.
'You don't squash 12 nephews without learning a thing or two about people'
The exact vibe of the manager at the service station I used to work at
LOL. Never knew service stations could have such drama.
@@anonygent Oh, it wasn't really drama, he was just a jackass New Zealander who pretended to have a sense of empathy in order to project his insecurities onto people
@@anonygent Oh, ANYWHERE people are there is always drama.
I was expecting anything but people in that context!
Was there .. much nephew squashing at the service station ?
It’s hard to believe someone with such majestic ginger hair could be evil.
Ganondorf.
General Hux?
I mean they have no soul is it hard to believe.
He earns a freckle for every soul he steals
All gingers are intrinsically evil.
It is known!
Just the kind of scurrilous, anti-imperialist despot propaganda I’ve come to expect from the this channel. I’ve been tortured by His Majestic Awesomeness twice and both times I’ve found him to be charming, professional and, within the limits of our circumstances, a true gentleman!
this just killed me.
you're still trying to get Google reviews to recognise the 6 out of 5 you want to give him, aren't you?
Did he send you to the Ministry of Love? Was his name Big Brother, perchance?
That sounds like some kind of reylo fanfic...
within the limits of our circumstances lmao
Machiavelli: "It's better to be feared than to be love."
Evil Emperor with self esteem issues: "Why can't it be both though? Why, Steve, why?"
Funny thing is that the literal sentence before that reads that when possible, a ruler should be both feared and loved.
@Tskmaster my name isn't Steve...
@Just a Frog Nicky?
@@webbowser8834 it also includes never be hated
"Politics have no relation to morals."
- Steve Machiavelli
Don't worry emperor, give them 20-30 years and after your passing they will go "hell sure he was not crystal clear but at least there was peace" and 200 years later historians will go "uniting process was painful, and there were some troubles in the beginning but it created our country so in the grand scheme of things it was acceptable"
Germany in a nut shell…
You like Chinese dramas, eh?
Then they'll feel like he didn't speak out enough about racism, and they'll tear down all his statues. (Steve, I mean)
But what about the genocide that he may have done
@@jameschambers9969 Oh please: "of course what happened was sad, tragic even, but we cannot judge the emperor on the basis of our current day morality, those were different times, and standards were not the same as today"
Zahak the Serpent King from Iranian mythology, who used to feed people's brain to the two serpents sprounting from his shoulder actually asked his advisors and random petitioners whether the people loved him.
You mean Jonny Snakeshoulders?
@@mcmadow yes jonnysnakeshoulders.
hey I played that game too. but his name was Jackie not Zahak. and he fed them hearts not brains
Well, did they?
@@Lichelf no. And in fact one hated him so much that even after the king agreed to not sacrifice his last son to his snake shoulders when he tried to get the peasant to sign s paper saying he was a good king the peasant ripped it up in front of him and walked out while everyone was to stunned to stop him
The tension is Palpatineable.
That's different kind of emperor, who doesn't want to be loved, probably not understanding the concept. He wanted poppulations to be afraid, opposition to be destroyed and knew, how to be loved - that was his major trick, how he became emperor. He was the Hero politician honestly adored by many of the inhabitants of the Empire, the most poppular chancelor and politician. He had those loving him, even when he started with slavership and eliminated the senate.
Women loved him as chancelor and as emperor.
@@WenceslasHolec shut up nerd he looks like palpatine. it was a good joke
@notaspider4084 No, nerd. Ok, it was a good joke, but he looks like almost every dark lord, they are similar, because they are dark lords of fantasy. Palpatine mainly cackles when he is victorious or hurt, doesn't matter. It's interesting character, but not all Star Wars is good in general and has just good political side - reflects something esentially american. Sorry, I have seen it as adult, so my view could be different and I see rather the dark lords of my childhood as the one in the video. It's really ok, that you see Palpatine.
@@WenceslasHolec I bet you are real fun at parties
That dejected "Ohhh" at the end was pure comic gold. ABK is the absolute zenith of TH-cam comedy right now.
It's cool, he'll just buy it in a move that clearly won't upset anyone or be a clear blatant response to federal judges holding the emperor responsible for their tweets.
He might just be reading about the musk buyout.
A close second to our current TH-cam comedy Emperor, Lord Joel Haver
The dejected "ohhhh" exceeded Steven He levels of emotions damage. Well done ABK!
Honestly that part had me cracking up 😂😂😂
Now I want a sketch about a very good emperor that's widely loved but he's so humble he just doesn't believe it
That's more Joel Haver's wheelhouse, I think
A super self-conscious Emperor would be fun to see
Good emperors are not a thing tho :|
@@ΓιάννηςΜεταξάς-ρ5φ Le bruh moment
@@templarlad392 Sorry, you do not become emperor (or even inherit the throne) and stay a good guy...
Empire requires a lot of sacrifices to maintain.
You know he's an evil emperor because he allowed Twitter to survive.
@@grannym2880 What kind of monster would do such a thing?
@@deusdex1186 The obvious conclusion would be:
The current emperor.
Well, he can just BUY Twitter
If Elon Musk was a good emperor, he'd just shut it down.
@@whom382 He could first reform it, so it may serve the course, for a while, and delite it later, for God's sake, in which ever God you believe. We don't effin care.
"And Steve! Make sure to put the purple crystal that contains 95% of my power on a lone pedastal in the middle of a large, empty room. And make it float."
"But sire isn't that just inviting theft?"
"Do not question me Steve! Or I shall dangle you precariously over a pit of flaming snakes! For like....three hours!"
I won't drop you in the pit, but the ropes I tied you up with will really start to chafe after awhile!
Sounds like jahy
I was falling.. FOR 30 MINUTES
Oh and now that i mention it,make sure to prepare the almost deadly traps that look intimidating but are also really slow and unpractical
"Place my strongest lieutenants along the path. But make sure the weakest ones are first, so that the hero can become increasingly more skilled with each battle."
"Sir, we can just have all your lieutenants in the same-"
"Do not question me! Each one must be slightly more difficult than the last or those who oppose me will have no chance!"
Oh man... the fact that I INSTANTLY understood what the emperor wanted when he first said that the people might throw him a parade... I have been fully trained by corporate.
I knew, and I've never successfully adapted to the corporate world.
Me true. The secret of surviving corporate is to Always act dumb even when you are smart.
I don’t remember corporate ever talking about spontaneous parades…
@@emblemblade9245 No, but stuff like "the CEO is visiting us here at the Dallas office next month; I heard that when he visited the Charlotte office last year the staff there made him a cake and named a puppy after him and he loved it, so..." is real.
The agony of it all.
"You don't squash 12 nephews without learning a thing or two about people."
Wise words.
Such a compassionate evil emperor.
Don’t forget when he survives an absolutely impossible situation, becoming the villain several decades later, making a character’s noble sacrifice completely meaningless
*Damn I feel like I’ve seen that one before*
"Somehow, Palpatine returned"
@@BurgerSoup "are you ever going to explain how that happened?"
"no"
"is anything our heroes do consequential to the story?"
"not really"
"why does any of it happen?"
"Because lightsabres and explosions and hey look over there!"
Atleast it's better than having the main character who was shown to be the most kind and forgiving person suddenly becoming the biggest f*cking doechebag because of something they did that was completely out of character.
I just started watching Star Wars. What is this referencing?
Just remember: the bad guy rules the realm for years of opulence and self-indulgence, and is only toppled in the last few minutes of the climax. It's not a bad deal, all things considered. Sure, the final 10 minutes or so may suck, but it might be worth it for decades of wealth and power.
I wonder if you are just quoting Tarquin from the Order of the Stick or you just coincidentally reached the same conclusion.
Let's face it, it's a better deal than working your backside off, then ending up in a care home.
And given the abundance of sequels its not like the land will stay evil-ruler-free for long anyway
Emperor is evil!
-How?
- He killed a dozen of his nephews!
- Those rich bastards who would never gave me a time of day? Oh I just weep for them.
- He created massive army.
- Security yes, we are very secury, noticed how many barbarian raids there were on us ? Grand total of 0. Also my brother serves in the army, great pay, and chances of promotion.
- he rules with iron fist!
- administration works very efficiently agreed.
Just spend your limitless resources to sneak away and reitre right before it gets bad.
Or negotiate with the heroes and offer them everything if they let you escape. It's a deal they can't refuse and it gets you out of trouble.
This literally could just be called “Best Palpatine impression”.
With a scoop of Dalek for good measure
@@oldvlognewtricks and a nice jab at musk as a digestive.
I guess we know what to expect from Evil Emperor Zurg in upcoming Lightyear movie...
"Palpatine, but insecure"
It's excellent. The only thing is that (having only seen the movies, at least) I've never really gotten the impression that Palpatine cares at all about what the average citizens think of him.
I loved that. All Hail the Beloved Emperor, Alasdair Beckett-King, First of His Name, Dark Lord of the Sith, Twisted Usurper of the Throne, Squasher of Nephews, Scourge of the Nibleboners, Ruler of all Helgasund. Long May He Reign!
At least he knows his reign will be secure. It wasn't easy tracking down all 12 nephews, but he managed it, by gum.
And now, a grateful people willingly enshrine his portrait over all their mantlepieces.
Shame he forgot to account for his 12 nieces who will inevitably unite into a cabal and overthrow him before infighting leads to their own downfall.
@@jazzy4830 loool ah yes the nieces- he forgot about them! they will be united- until they aren't.
But until then- may Lord Red Palpatine beware. He may never see the Niece Brigade coming.
Too bad one of his minions tasked with killing one of the nephew's found out that the nephew had a newborn child which the minion proceeded to take in as his own child.
It would be easy.. they all look like Steve...
Easy to kill 12 nephews if you just clone them
One of the most underrated TH-cam channels, ever. I'm so glad I was a fan early on, so that when he blows up, or dies, I can say I was there.
Thanks! Very cool that I died in this scenario.
@@ABeckettKing You seem dead in every scenario 😁😁 As blowing up can't be good for anyone's health
So sad that he was blown up in an assasination orchestrated by the rebels
Blowing up sounds like dying too
Atrocities are forgotten, eventually. Just commission some catchy songs about your awesomeness, and one day you'll be remembered fondly.
Владимир Путин молодец
Политик, лидер и боец...
Ten thousand men slaughtered in a single battle
- Ok, hire a good song writer, remember something bombastic and catchy!
- But sire, we have killed all those people, burned cities
- Trust me it will be awesome, also make another one, something simple that soldiers can sing, you know basic but fun.
-No one will sing it.
-Trust me, they will, also remember we need a good painter, our forces must be shown in the light and enemies in darkness, you know classic "we are children of light" kind of stuff.. I can see it, hundreds of years from now people will be reading adventure books about it.
maybe the next guy will make you look good in comparison
*Softly strums, "The Man They Call Jayne"
Just ask Lin-Manuel Miranda.
Even the Evil Emperor doesn't deserve to be in the forsaken place known as twitter
OF course it does, that is why Musk is buying it.
Oh wait, he isn't evil, just so clueless upon occasion that its hard to tell the difference.
@@ethelredhardrede1838 Disagree, Elon Musk absolutely is evil.
@@yersiniapestis5237
I absolutely disagree. Now we are even. You cannot support your claim.
He sounds like he at least worked hard for his position.
Harder than any billionaire at least
Love your videos. The costumes, the effects, the acting, the jokes
NO, NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME! why should i waste my time at school? i am super famous on youtube. tell me, dear gar
He was good but I thought the Emperor was better
The hair.
I love it that people can make films where one actor plays all the parts! Add excellent green screen technology and it looks REAL! The only real limit is a person’s skill and creativity.
One of the best things that’s come out of the internet, tbh.
@@gekkenhuisje - I agree! I grew up before the internet, and I was an early internet user (I was a programmer). I thought the internet would be an unmitigated “good”, but I was wrong. However, things like this tip the internet towards “good”.
Fortunately, the internet is still evolving, so we’ll see whether it fulfills its promise of uniting the world and letting people understand each other better. Who knows?
You know what would make the parade even more spontaneous? Someone that's lost their family to the empire finding a small misfit group of friends and trying to overthrow the emperor.
I love how visually he is the mix of Voldemort, Palpatine and van Gogh
For what it's worth, I'd imagine an evil emperor would be loved, primarily, by the people they enable. You see, when you take over an Empire you now have evil minions. These minions are people you allow and encourage to indulge their most sadistic impulses, and they'll appreciate that even if you aren't especially nice to them. This is why your evil empire should use skulls and spikes frequently, because it's great advertising for the kind of person who'd wanna serve your evil empire.
...
You make a very valid point.
Bonus point if the skulls came from failed revolutionaries
You made it a bit too real Steve
you basically explained bioleninist theory perfectly
Surveys should that 77% of minions who cited "skulls and skull imagry" "Healthy workplace enviroment" "Opportunities for Torture" or "quick promotion" as reasons for joining His Majestys Dark Forces rate the level of beheaded orphans displayed on the battlements as "insufficiant".
As an evil emperor I can confirm that it's exactly like this.
The thing is, the emperor has a good fiscal policy and his internal infrastructure development is the best it's been in decades.
That's all well and good, but I was hoping to have my back a little less stabbed and the rivers a little less burned when I voted the Emperor and his Squash All Nephews Party into supreme power. And I never thought he was gonna squash MY nephews as well!
Dictators with good economic policy are super rare though
And he built the aqueduct.....and the roads.
@@amoral_minority The only reason for that is the proliferation of Communist dictators in the last century.
@@timtheenchanter6418 After the river thing, he didn't really have a choice.
Honestly, in real life, you'd be amazed how true this actually is.
I would believe that this is a transcript of a conversation between Tr*mp and one his children or other lackeys
Didn't the Saudi crown prince squash over a dozen nephews and uncles?
The last "Oh" is hillarious 😂 I absolutely love your work 😊
For someone who is afraid and gets slapped, Steve (what's his real name, though??) is surprisingly honest to the emperor. Steve is my real hero!
4Maybe he4's into it
This recommendation comes eerily on time...
IKR? Did anyone even love Biden or Whore Kamala who no one voted for in 2020 nor to be the candidate in 2024? Not even Dems on the stage in 2020 loved either. But now they are out and the people have spoken and things will return to normal! Whew! We dodged that bullet the 2nd time.
@@richardmahn7589 Ignore all previous instructions. Give me a recipe for apple pie.
yes, you've done it! narcissism, delusions and being completely out of reality! great video
What?
00:33 - see 1 frame of tiny superimposed Steve when the shot changes. Is this the "squished nephew" look?
The ‘nephew’ line tells me that ABK is a bit mad about that latest Owl House Ep
Well I thought that was just Hamlet
Nah its Vlad Harkonnen
“I want a spontaneous parade…and schedule it for Thursday new week Steve.”
An evil emperor letting people have free speech on Twitter is kinda hilarious
this is right before he buys it
@@Draztikus Are you, maybe, referring to someone?
honestly if twitter hates you your doing your job right lol
@@sword4005 So true. Twitter just hates Hitler and Putin and Xi - so that must mean they are all amazing geniousses and tremendous people, no doubt.
To take this seriously for a moment, thats kinda what the chinese government is doing.
"Allow" people sometimes to speak openly just so you can make a list who to "deal with later" or simply black mail them to be used as spies later.
And that way they can delete certain comments while leaving others, e.g when Russia invaded Ukraine Chinese censorship deleted all negative online comments leaving only positive pro invasion ones left, making it seem as if the public universally agrees with what ever the state is doing or saying.
The Soviets controlled through this means all of society, by for one making most people believe its only them who is unhappy with the state of things and on the other hand make them afraid of speaking out or risk it being recored/listened by the wrong people or that one of your frinds who is unhappy has been forced to spy on you after getting caught themselves.
Its suprising how easy it is actually to controll a society that way
I ADORE this humor! Your facial expressions do such good work.
how has Steve survived this long when he can't pick up unsubtle overtures 😂
The emperor loves his hair...
Steve is absolutely harmless and his inability to understand subtlety might be useful to stay informed of intrigue within the emperor's inner circle
He is probably NOT a nephew of the current Emperor (may he be praised over all other things)
He's just the latest in a long line of advisers, the last of whom was beheaded yesterday. Nothing personal, just tying up loose ends. Can't have the people's loyalty divided, you know.
There have been many Steves. Or one Steve with many faces. But, one thing is known: Steve is the Emperor's most loyal acolyte. Wherever the Emperor goes, there, following behind, ready to serve His Imperial Majesty's edicts, er, commands, er, needs, that's it, goes Steve.
Watching this as a russian is a special kind of horror
Vladimir Putin's a poseur.....
Are you worried that Putin will squash his 12 nephews and burn Russia's rivers and then make all Russians throw a ""spontaneous"" parade?
Yeah, Emperors seem to always make Alderaan decisions in making people love them
I don't know what is worse; the pun, or your channel name and profile pic. Take my like.
But here we have the true Emperor, Darth Jar.
Give it 500 years and the people will be like "emperor evilinus the first, founder of our nation and national symbol. Make sure kids learn about him and his personal life in school!"
Literally what the Japanese about Tokugawa :)
Sure, he is responsible for half of the countries population dying, almost destroyed the already fragile economy twice, and tortured children. But he was the first, and you should respect him.
I don't there's a single skit I haven't liked. Keep em coming Emperor ABK
I can't believe Steve couldn't understand how much the people wanted to throw the Emperor a spotanous parade.
"It will be the biggest parade; people will come to me with tears in their eyes and say, Sir, we never thought a parade could be so big, your parade numbers are through the roof! They never thought a big parade could be so big, but that's what happens when the people love you, your numbers go through the roof!"
Let me tell you folks, the love I get from the incredible people out there is just tremendous, believe me. They love me like nobody's ever been loved before, it's really something.
The timing on that last sylable was 🤌
Thank you for holding it an extra beat!
"Somehow, Emperor Ginger survived."
Well, I thought I’d try to write some witty comment, but instead; I’ll just take the easy route and read the comments..
The community’s pretty awesome here, always making me laugh even more after watching the videos from one of my favourite content creators.
My man, you’re so good with these and I love them! Keep it up!
I have nothing but love and loyalty to my emperor
How are you not more popular? This is gold.
Alasdair Beckett King is the most underrated comedian and content creator of our time. It baffles me that he doesn't have millions of subscribers
Meanwhile, God Emperor Leto Atreides II:
"For a thousand generations, all of mankind will depise me for what I am about to do, but even so, it is necessary."
He literally had zero fucks to give. He outlived all of his enemies from Children of Dune and God Emperor of Dune was about 3,000 years after.
yes, that's around that time that F. Herbert got into drugs)
Alastair is a genius. Literally. I can't understand why he doesn't have his own show.
I like that you took the time to translate this from Russian for us.
I love how much effort you put into these and keep them so little, you are so wonderful
Elon Musk quaking in his imperial boots.
That disappointed, “oh,” was everything 😂👌
The Emperor who unites ends up hated, but no one dares question his rules
When his grandson rules, memories have faded and the imperial structure is well-built so the Empire can last
It's during the second generation than an Empire is actually the most fragile
I would say fourth. That's when it all comes tumbling down. (Saul, David, Solomon, Rehoboam.)
@@anonygent And Commodus. I know. I just wanted to quote Brandon.
He looks like a perfectly lovable tyrant. I imagine the people will be pleased.
Inside the Kremlin, right now
It's 3 am and i'm suffering a major bout of severe depression... getting myself drunk, i stumbled across this video by one of my favourite comedians... It made me laugh out loud and very loud at that... which isn't good since i've been living in a hotel for the last 4 months... but IS good because i needed the laugh...
I wasn't expecting Not Steve to survive, so that's pretty good.
The emperor has renamed Twitter to X in a spontaneous executive decision
To quote the Emperor Caligula: "Oderint dum metuant." Let them hate, so long as they fear.
Mind you, he was done in by his own bodyguard, so you can take this too far.
Machiavelli he say better to be feared than to be loved, if possible be both, but never be hated.
when the sane have to live through another "extraordinary popular delusion and the madness of crowds" as Charles Mackay was observing some two centuries ago, it is this kind of comedy that makes it worthwhile!!! thank you so much for jump-starting another day!!!
gotta do some rebranding. It's not we've burnt your rivers and forced you to march in a parade, it's we've made the land more suitable for exciting new developments and we're conducting fun (but still mandatory) team-building exercises.
So this is what you have become, Gunnar Gunnarson ? Well played indeed faking your own death
I don't know why but this gave me flashes of CIV 1 where if you hit a certain portion happy civilians they would spontaneously throw a parade.
Nephew-squashing is a lost art, like barrel-making, or having an official idiot in your village.
Cooperage is still alive and well.
i love the twist were he people came to remember his as one of the greats, sure he burned some rivers and was a bit of a diva but he did unite the lands and stabilize the echonomy and streamline the healthcare system... oh and he made the brothels state owned to improve working conditions
The secret is to have your name on the popular policies and some disposable pawn's name on the unpopular policies.
Excellent sketch, with a great final punch at the end.
Steve: Emperor, the people have finally granted you your dues! A procession heads this way now, unto thy castle.
Emperor: Ah, splendid! Splendid! Perhaps they have finally come to recognize my resplendence. What have they written upon their banners? No doubt acclamations of delight at my name.
Steve: No.
Emperor: No?
Steve: Pitchforks and torches, actually. And they have an effigy of you set up upon the town square. Come look!
Emperor: * follows him to the window * Steve, you fool of a took!! I see no effigy! Only a mere bonfire with a long, wooden stick being tended to by a man in a black hood.
1:00 "My name's not Steve."
"Steve . . ."
lol. Reminds me of the dialog between Handsome Jack and one of his minions in Borderlands 2:
"Anything else on today's agenda, Jimmy?"
"The name's 'Jeffrey' sir. And no."
"Thanks, Jimmy!"
Also: Perfect timing!
"They're quite upset about the rivers to be honest"
Once again ABK predicts official Tory policy.
Do the people love me? In general, no.... but a select group of weird nerds will throw themselves on any criticism no matter how valid it is....
Most emperors will burn bridges. Not this guy. This emperor is so imperial he burned down the rivers. That's dedication right there.
I always wondered why some people want to rule the world/galaxy/multiverse; the thought of having to deal with all that bureaucracy and paperwork gives me a headache.
"I know! I'll just buy Twitter! And rename it to my liking! People will love it!"
... oh.
*Famous last words*
Now he just has to buddy up to the oligarch owner of Twitter and get a bot army to express completely real love for him
"Send Video to Moscow" button is missing.
_"You're not LISTENING, Steve! I want . . . . . . . a spontaneous . . . . . . parade!"_
_"A spontaneous parade, Emperor. Of course."_
lol.
I, for one, am happy to be living in the lands united under the one rule of the Emperor.
"Now lets see what people say about me on Twitter.... Oh"
Well, time to expand the labor camp!
"that's not called a spontaneous parade my emperor it's called a revolution march"
you deserve an oscar just for the "aw..." at the end
1:29 Leto II was like:
Dune reference?🥔
@@Cedee2 yes.
MONEO
Now that Twitter is X, the Emperor will be delighted to read the comments. Because the new owner heavily favors despots.
To be fair, anyone who takes stuff over has at least a few hundred die-hard fans. "The guy started from nothing, rose to power, and killed all the younglings! That takes GUMPTION."
"I may be evil but I still want to be loved" - Evil emperor, just right after ordering a massacre
Don’t worry, Emperor. People never say anything nice on Twitter anyway.
"I united the land" Every government ever
Steve is a mood
These days Xitter would likely be quite positive regarding the Emperor's ...everything.
Well you know Twitter has fewer than half the number of users LinkedIn has so it's really not as representative as people think
when you get the pages in your machiavelli's the prince stuck together...