How to Communicate With Men | Dating Advice for Women by Mat Boggs
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In this video you'll learn the one key to communicate your needs with your man in the most effective way.
Please post a comment on this video... I'd love to hear your thoughts about this topic!
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VIDEOS ABOUT COMMUNICATION WITH MEN (Communication Advice)
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What to Say When a Vanisher Comes Back
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VIDEOS ABOUT DATING ADVICE
7 (FALSE!) Reasons You re Still Single
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What NOT to do on a First Date (Strange But True)
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VIDEOS ABOUT UNDERSTANDING MEN
Why he acts interested, then disappears (The inside answer most don t know)
• Why He Acts Interested...
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• Scared of Getting Hurt...
When Should You Sleep With Him?
• Video
VIDEOS ABOUT WHAT MEN WANT / HOW TO TELL IF HE LIKES YOU
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• The Kind of Confidence...
5 Unusual Signs Your Man is into You!
• 5 Unusual Signs Your M...
How to tell if he is emotionally available
• How to Tell If He Is E...
VIDEOS ABOUT CONFIDENCE AND SELF-WORTH
3 Affirmations to Attract Love
• 3 Affirmations to Attr...
3 Ways to Create More Self-Love
• 3 Ways to Create More ...
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• Uncool Is the New Cool...
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Mat Boggs Bio:
As a sought-after dating and relationship coach for women and international speaker, Mat Boggs has helped thousands of women understand men, improve their relationships, and attract the relationship they want.
As the best-selling author of Project Everlasting, and creator of Cracking The Man Code, Mat Boggs dating and relationship advice has been featured on national media including The Today Show, CNN, Headline News, Oprah and Friends, and many more.
Mat s Mission: To increase love in the world, one heart at a time.
As a dating coach for women, Mat believes that your history does not determine your destiny, and that you are more powerful than any circumstance you are facing. The relationship dream in your heart really can become the life you love living!
Mat Boggs highly acclaimed relationship programs have served women around the world in all age groups from 20yrs old to over 70yrs old.
If you re interested in receiving help attracting love or improving your relationship click here: www.crackingthemancode.com/coa...
Related Topics:
Dating Advice For Women
Relationship Advice For Women
Relationship Coach For Women
Dating Coach For Women
Dating, Relationships, understanding men, Dating Advice, Love Advice Relationship Advice, How Men Think, What Men Want, What attracts men, How to attract a man, how to create lasting love, how to know if he likes you, signs your man likes you.
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4:19 "telling a man how to deliver you happiness"
Yes! As a man, I confirm that this is a major motivator for us. If you want your man to do something for you, tell him it's something you want.
I told him I wanted him to clean the dishes.
...I’m still waiting 😂
@@noorthernluces190 😂😂
How do you want to hear it being asked if you?
A man in my life just said I speak disrespectful like I am telling him what to do. Even though I feel like I am asking nicely if we wouldn’t mind doing the small thing.
I don’t know the correct way to effectively communicate it across to the man.
It's better to be direct. Saves a lot of time. Avoids misunderstandings. And each person doesn't have to guess what the other person wants. If they love you they'd be happy to express their love for you in ways you want to be loved.
you just like me frl. I can't stand when people WALK around the bush like some folks got time, when a lot of us don't have the mental patience. So I agree with you, let's just be honest, yet respectful
Exactly! We'll said!
@@anisa3610 yeah. Being direct also helps us get the answer we need right away and then we can make a decision on what to do next.
The reason women ask "Do you want to..." instead of telling a man "I would love it if you would..." is because we don't want to be demanding and make you do things that would make you unhappy. We want you to WANT to do that thing for us. I would rather be disappointed by you not wanting to help me than for you to show up all grumpy and annoyed because I pulled you away from something you were enjoying. I see this behavior with my folks and I don't want that.
Then don't force him to. Tell him you would like him to and if he doesn't seem interested, then tell him that it's fine if he would prefer not to. You both need to be happy in your relationship. It isn't just about what the woman or man wants. Compromise is often key.
You do that anyway. Men expect you to be needy. Be direct and it makes the situation direct.
The reason I ask "do you want" instead of telling them that I want them to go with me is because I want to know that he WANTS to spend time with me. It's not really about going to the place, its about seeing that he LIKES spending time with me.
While that may be true, sometimes we still get upset when they are honest with their answers. Sometimes we communicate With others in the way that we like to be communicated to, or that we think they should communicate with us. In a relationship, it's important to communicate in the way that person best responds. Our communication should not be positioned to give us personal gratification, that's insecurity. Communication should have the intent of sending a direct message.
+Tapered Natural
you're right, it should be direct. I guess it's more of a direct question, "do you want to go to wherever with me?" one instance doesn't necessarily mean more than a yes or no. but if I get a "yes" 9 out of 10 times, I would think that he likes going with me, if I get a "no" 9 out of 10 times, I would think that he doesn't like going with me.
Kiseo Chan Either way I still think Matt is right that if it's what we want we should say it instead of asking. Most likely you'll still get an honest answer from the man.
Kiseo Chan l agree with you.l think it's true that we'd like to spend time with the one we like the most but sometimes they may not think the same.lol
Kiseo Chan There is nothing wrong with that but consider that maybe while he does want to spend time with you, maybe he hasn't seen his friend in ages and is enjoying his time there. In essence you put him in a no win situation that is a bit unfair. If you would like him there, then tell him so, he prioritizes YOU after all.
I totally did this today all wrong. I said, "you can come over whenever you want." I was trying to seem like I didn't care what choice he made, but I do. That's indirect communication. Thanks for the video!
diii
I was able to tell my boyfriend how I am feeling completely and you gave me the strength to tell him. We love each other. I was always told to be indirect cause of self esteem issues. Thank you so much
Absolute gold!
Exactly what should happen. To the point.
Be direct and clear.
i've been learning about male psychology in romantic relationship for far too long i think i'm emotionally a male now.
LOL!
Hahahah underrated comment
Lmao
getting in touch with your masculine side:)?
I'm sorry for your loss. :)
I think it's great for both men and women to be more direct (in a pleasant way). Better to put it in a pleasant way, but sometimes makes me fearful that he will say no, and it leads me to feeling vulnerable. Especially with someone that I'm simply dating or just hoping to get to know better. Maybe it's better to look through it with the eyes of respect for yourself and the guy you're talking to, and hopefully he will step up to bat and that he can see it.
He's talking about situation where the couples are used to each other, otherwise its understandable to use hints, men do that as well, we all fear rejection.
I am very direct with my man. I tell him exactly what I want & need. Great video 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Communication is my weakness. Really need to strengthen that muscle. But love your videos. They put me on a high vibrational frequency
Matt! Thank you for shedding light on the male psyche and how we as women can communicate better with them and in turn increase positive energy within the relationship. Your wisdom and insight are so valuable and I’m grateful for all of your videos. THANK YOU!!!!
Mathew thanks for this video. I am now a better communicator with Men, love it, love it!!!
I love the way you explain,its stops when i still want to watch and listen to it
I love your videos! Your interpretations are so clear and easy to understand!! Please keep posting!!
This was your best- you need to expand on it, it's so crucial!~
You are teaching such an important subject man! If you had like a workshop/mastermind teaching this topic to both ment & women (we would have so many relationships thriving in the world!) Rock on
Hi Mat, I really love your videos. I shared your videos to my family who are now all married. It's a good relationship conversation. Thank you.
Thank you for making this video! I appreciate all of the advice. Keep up the good work!
I'm a direct person and always ask my guy out--but after awhile it makes me feel desperate, like I'M the only one who is wanting this, while he's like, "Meh, whatever." 😞😞😞
meki licious exactly it’s like talking to a wall
Me too 😢
Yes man
Same
Just tell him you want to go out on blah day and he needs to pick what you're doing while out.
Any hint when it comes to men , is a good hint ! Matt you are easy on the eyes and interesting to listen to.
Lol loved this video! 😀 I love when you explain things by applying your personal take on your topic! So “down to earth” lol Thank you!
This is so true! It's one reason I love men...because they say what they mean and mean what they say. They don't put it in vague terms. I love that.
Do they. Ask them to explain because their direct response was ambigious and watch them stop say what then deflect rather than actually simply rephrase or attempt to explain.
Men use few words thinking as this presenter did it is a clear answer because it is to them, they never believe it can be heard as having two meanings.
Woman who let husband know of works party why didnt husband do the blunt man thing and say so you want me to come if it is good?
thanks
@@MovieTube4Me me learned not to be too blunt with their girlfriend or wives it's TRUE. because it hurts them. and they get upset. we generally like our wives and believe it's better when they are happy.
SOOOOOO AWESOME!!! I really need to learn more about communicating with man, this video really helps! Thank you Matt!!
i love the way you discuss things... hmm very informative to know more about men... thanks!!
Love seeing your videos pop up!
You stated in the video that if you ask for the same things and they don't change or get done, you need to change the way you communicate. Well I've been with my bf for 6 years now and for the past two I have been communicating like you say in the video. Asking for direct actions vs vague statements. He still to this day does not pick up on it whatsoever and I'm starting to realize that it's time to make a decision whether this is forever or not.
So I guess my question is: how do I know I've done my part in trying to communicate with him and feel like if I have to walk away I did everything I could to try to make things work?
Thanks in advance! I look forward to seeing your response!
I love your videos. I’m currently in a very healthy, communicative, and loving relationship. I have learned a lot about how to communicate with and understand my man from your advice. Yesterday I watched your video about how to touch a man to turn them on...and let’s just say it was right on and we had an amazing time in bed. I love your candor, honesty, lack of asking women to play games, and the variety of your videos. I have watched other’s advice here on the tubes, but I keep coming back to your videos because when your advice is put into practice...it works! Thank you so so so very much for helping women navigate the divide between a man’s brain, needs, wants, and communication style, and those qualities in women. I hope you know what a gift you are to the tricky, yet f***ing amazing world, of relationship. I honor you and am grateful for all your advice.💗
Loved that advice...I will definitely use, thank you!!
this is an awesome piece of advice and im taking it with me wherever I go... thanks Matt...
Hello and thank you for your very simple and informative videos on relationships!!.....
First and foremost thank you also for your professional approach!.....
Ive watched many different relationship coaches and well, their language is NOT professional if you know what i mean,.......
Anyways, your videos have been a great help!.....
Thank you for doing what you do for us!!....
Much love and joy😀💌
Mariana~
Very useful technique! Really appreciate this tip Mat!!! You always talk to the practical point!
You're super right, when I tell my boo directly he loves it rather than I'm being a riddle. :-)
You are awesome! Thank you sooo much for this videos! You are smart and kind!
Well that explains a lot! Valuable lesson- thank you!
This is a GREAT video, and it was delivered with tongue-n-cheek humor :)
Wow. I need this guy to be my life coach! In all relationships not only romantic ones
Omg SO EYE OPENING!! Makes so much sense
I don't understand. A woman will only ask something if she wants you to do that for her. So isn't the question do.you want to actually would you? Y is there such a difference ?!
Only few men wants to deliver you a happiness these days . Most men just wants to get into your pants without doing anything actually.
Freezy Rachel yep. exactly.😐
So true.
"without doing anything".....
My Translation: "what have you done for me lately"
Freezy Rachel somehow i just really agree with u
Agree Rachael. Want u to work in every possible way for their Benefit then ignore u totally and take all the credit
I like to be more direct but the man I like tends to be indirect. I had to recently tell him a better way to communicate something with me in a more direct way so that I can understand better. I came across in a loving way I believe so I will see in time if it got through to him.
You call it being direct, I call it strait up lying. This is the number one thing me and my wife fight about. It drives me nuts. No matter what I ask her she never tell me the truth.
How about making a video of how to teach men how to communicate with women. Men need these lessons too.
YES THANK YOU … I know women aren’t always great communicators either. However, my personal experience I truly have learned how to be effective in speaking due to 2 failed marriages and many many life lessons. I changed completely. I’m trying to explain to a man there are better ways WE can communicate and I would like to help him. I also mentioned therapy and immediately he says I don’t need therapy you do. I’m deducing his behavior and lack of effective communication to not having the proper resources or care to want to look at his behavior and communication skills with me. I can only try but ultimately I’m berated and told I don’t understand nothing. Not sure how to help him.
Great advice... i guess sometimes we do assume you guys know what we mean
Now that qas a great video.. Short and to the point. ❤🎼🐾
Yes!!! I've been saying this for years!!! My mom would ask me all the time "do you want to do this" and the real answer was "no I dont"! But that wasn't what she was really asking! I saw her do this to my father all growing up and realized that I was starting to talk to my (at the time) person essentially IN CODE. 🤯 not like THAT is confusing at all! 🤣
I really hate demanding my BF to do things cause I don't know how he feels. Me I really need his opinions so I know he's happy and comfortable with whatever we are doing at the moment
it was so helpful for me , thanks .
i LOVE this guy!
Thanks! I tried it with my partner hopefully we can communicate better :)
Love that joke about the genie!!
Mega-LOL
thank you , i am learning to talk with men
Wow, make since, love the advice
Thank you Matt, really appreciate this!
I'm going to try this. Thank you! 😀
great Max tnx for this tip on communication with men
Ya I'm still taking the beer over any of those secondary questions.
wow. this is an eye opening view!
Loved this!!
I used this and it worked like a charm!!
Such sn awesome piece of advice! Thank you!
you make me happy with your videos thank you!!** mathew
thank you! This was so helpful
I like such advices without a template
Beautiful!!!! Thank you!!!
This is good!! Thank you!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Love it! Thank you.
The joke in the first couple of minutes is very good!
I loved the Aladdin's high way 🏍
Thanks for another inspirational video
Ok, a little inconsistency here... if guys are so "direct" why didn't the dude just say, No, or 'Not really because I just got to my friend's house and I have a beer and I want to chill".. The guy is the one who is being dishonest, and indirect. Matt Boggs, maybe your wife really just wanted to know if you wanted to get the valet ticket You assumed that she is trying to manipulate you into doing something, rather than simply answering her straightforward question. You are overthinking and projecting feeling on to her that she may not really have. Take it at face value, and tell her "No, I don't really want to go, but if you would like for me to go, I will go." She may be perfectly fine with you saying "No". Men need to take what a women says at face value and not read all sorts of their own baggage into a simple question, that requires a straightforward answer, i.e.. Yes or No. Give the woman credit for being able to accept a no answer and being Ok with that.
dr mom in some cases it could be the way Matt said though. Some women are more indirect others aren't.
He talked about his experience, that means that he said no, and the consequences were't nice. or that he know his wife better by experience than to say no.
holey crackin moley hold the phones and shut the door!!! ( I so concur!)
Touche. Your right, if a guy expects you to be direct he needs to be direct back, and if he isn't he's probably a Mama's boy so watch out!
Thank you! This is helpful 😀
WOW!!! That was SUPER!!! Thank U!!!
Is there a page on face book where we can follow you. You are really good! I love your videos 👍🏼
I asks because l actually want to know what the person I care about honestly wants to do. That can influence what we do next. It helps me understand what the guy is into genuinely. I hate game playing and assumptions as to what I mean when I say something. Honesty leads to more intimacy and less resentment. Just be real. Ask questions. Don’t assume. Be yourself. I want the person who comes to the party with me to actually want to be there. I can have a good time on my own and we can always meet up later for things we both enjoy. Not every woman is the same.
I'm trying this this week. Hope it works.
love, love, love your videos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANKS :)
Thank you so much, I needed to lean this! 😊
learn*
I think it's safe to say most women want a man to be honest, forthright, funny, independent but also doting. To help provide his woman's needs, to love, honor, and cherish her for better for worse, sickness, and health, life so they only part when they need space, time alone, or some quality guy time. I'm pretty sure most women want a man that stands beside her, stands up for her, and fights for her as well. Women like to be courted, go on first dates even when they've been in a long term, long standing relationship as well. Women love surprises, to be spoiled from time to time, shown off but not paraded around, introduced to the friends and family of their significant other, and sexy, flirtatious games, but not head games.
Preach!!
you help me to understand my man. thank you.
thank you.
i will keep this tip in mind.
Men are so easy to decode.
hehe..
Thank you!! Mathew!!
thanks matt this really helps
I'm not sure I'm taking in what you're saying Mathew... but I can watch you all day... your so sweet =D
I love how your eyes match your shirt
I like you even more now that I know you’re a Steelers fan!
So helpful!
Great advice!!!!
This is true thank you mat👍🏼
You are totally missing the fact that when a woman (or anyone asks) "Would you want to...?" that's exactly what they mean to ask. They want to know if you want to do what they are requesting of you. If instead they do not care how you feel about what they want you to do they will instead say "I need you to come get this with me" or "Come meet me at this party." This is a classic case of men overthinking it. Here's some great advice and please share it: women want to be wanted, people like to be liked. If a woman asks if you want to do something with her guess what she's hoping you'll say yes but she's an adult and understands even if she is your number one priority your just not going to want to do everything she asks of you. And for crying out loud stop getting annoyed when a woman doesn't know where she wants to eat or what she wants to watch. Maybe just maybe she wants her partner to make a decision for once.
+Katydag88 EXACTLY I agree with being direct. For me, part of the reason why I would ask a "would you" question is because I want you to WANT to do those things- not just as a favor for me. And also I'm inviting you to be apart of something that I am doing.... it really is that simple.
Yes! I've always had this problem where in some of my past relationships, I was making all the decisions. Then there were men who were complete control freaks. No happy medium. Frustrating.
So don't get upset if he says no! women want to be wanted, and man need to be needed. So if you need him and you did tell him that and he say no, so that's frequently may mean something.
Well said!
I really admire you and your videos. Thanks for the stimulating and encouraging pieces of advice. They're all helpful. By the way, my boyfriend's name is Matt, same name as yours. I appreciate both of you Matt 1 and Matt 2 (giggles) :) :) :)
What if you’re told you’re too direct
If you and I could combine our methods, we might have the perfect way of saying things 🤣 (because I can be overly indirect). But for real, something that I’m seeing work for me is to be direct about what I want but still present it in a way that gives him the option of how he wants to respond. Yep, men definitely don’t like being told what to do...or left wondering what we actually want. I’m working on it too, girl. Good luck.
Sinerio:
Too direct: My wife asks- Do these jeans make me look fat, and I say no your stomach does.
Indirect: Do these jeans make me look fat?
No, but if you think they do you should start working out or dieting.
I hear you girl 😁
Exactly. They say they want direct.... but they really don’t. Promise.
Stay direct. Just be mindful of your delivery 😊
I want to know what you are supposed to do when you are direct and you still don't get waht you need
Btw....
Ive liked and subscribed!😀
Ok. I get it...
Saying "I would love you to".. do this or that or join me... Rather than "Would you like to..."
I think this way you are also setting up your mindset to be in a more fun spirit or be open of enjoying yourself ect apposed to thinking, why wouldn't he want to be with me? or do this for me, am I/my feelings not that important to him?
Our thoughts will keep on spiralling and probably kill the whole vibe or date or activity, ect.
Thanx
You're a god. Thank you!
Go Steelers and Penguins!! Sorry but I live in Pittsburgh and its awesome that your a fan of the Steelers 🙂
This video is very helpful, thank you very much. Do you have a video or pdf of example conversations or how to ask a man questions? In my mind, I am formulating questions for a man to understand. According to the man though, I am not formulating questions in a way they understand. Any examples would be greatly appreciated and beneficial. Thanks again!
Again women this man just gave you the truth.
Love this guy!