Eight Reasons why you should NOT MARRY a Single Mother 😳
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ค. 2024
- There are too many women having kids out of wedlock with men they wouldn’t or can’t marry or ignoring their Duty and Commitment first over their feels and then expecting to find good men to marry them to become Step-Dads .
Here are the 8 disadvantages you will encounter if you are considering Marring a Single Mother.
I married a single mother with a 9 month old. She had some personal issues. When he was 4 it was just me and him. I asked her in the state that she was in to let me raise him. When he was 7 I got Full Custody of him. He asked if I would adopt him and to change his name. As a single father I adopted him at the age of 14. He is 16 now. The biological father has never really been in the picture to the point the court terminated his parental rights. I am raising an Awesome Son! I didn't experience most of what you said. Men can love children as their own.
This is beautiful ! You have a pure soul and full of love heart. God bless you and your son.
EXCELLENT SPEECH FROM A VERY GOOD AND STRAIGHT FORWARD MAN
What an awesome man and father you are
You are rare
Congratulations. You are the exception, not the rule.
I married a single mother. She had 2 children. We had 1 child between us. I raised them as my own. Never had issues with any of that. They are all grown and I am their father not their donor. It doesn't always work out the way you discribed. My oldest was a girl. We had no problems. Treat them with respect and just love them. Becareful who you pick though.
Congrats my man you raised another man’s seed.
True his experience isn't everyone's
@@tigerheart5087 If he was a man it would have done it himself.
did you have your own kids before you got married?
@@mafamac4069 no
My stepdad married my mother who have me and my sister. He raised us, now he’s old and have dementia and we’re taking care of him.
Sad how your mother manipulated you into looking up to another man
Thank you for being good son and daugther!
Good girls God bless
God blessed your Dad.
🗣IF THE SHOE DON’T FIT DON’T WEAR IT. This ain’t about your family dynamic if it played out right. But now we are in different times, step kids aren’t what they use to be and also they’re mothers aren’t either.
To the young guys, take this advice from an old guy.
Find a traditional modest woman without children and be a traditional protective man.
Start your own family from scratch and teach them traditional values.
This advice will assist you greatly in the next step.
Don’t get into debt.
Yes sir
Shout out to all the stepfathers out there who are loved and valued by their step children.
No step father...just a father that stepped in✊🏿✌🏾💜
@@trentonsmessenger Word. True talk
Simping aint the way
I hope it works out.
@@christopherharris881 likewise
I’ll never do it again. Horrible decision.
He is telling young men things that they need to hear to avoid heartache
later in life and prepare for what may happen, yes there are success
stories but there are far more failures
Facts
You forgot about the raising up someone else's kid part and then they grow up and say you're not my dad.
But then wait.. and then they do call you dad. Kids say that because they can. To their biological parents, they say “I wish I was never born to you!” Immature brains lash out when they are not skilled at managing emotions.
For a stepfather the mothers should never let her child shame her as a mother... keep the child in check always.
That tight
8 reasons not to become a stepmother
O I'm never doin that lol
@@apriljackson7648 oh. So many males lash out against my comment.
Right! As if it will be any different for single parent dads. Im not comin in from being a single lady to boom a new relationship and a kid. I wanna get to know my man more before kids are introduced. What if i somehow don’t find out he would make a terrible parent, legit until year four of marriage? Im just sayin, we won’t be turnin that oven on on honey moon night. We gon fry some shet up top and move along. Lol
Facts. It goes both ways.
Both ways, I dated a single dad. I realized if that kid told a lie on me I would not be able to escape.🏃🏿♀️✌️
NOT EVERY SINGLE MOTHER IS THE SAME. JUST LIKE NOT EVERY OLD CARIBBEAN MAN IS THE SAME.
So you mean to tell me he didn't make a point and all you say is no Single mother is the same lol that's call delusional lol
@@reyrod8256 That sounds like someone that’s playing step-daddy lol
😂😂
@@katherineclay1691 GIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE LORD 🙏 JESUS CHRIST TODAY 🙏
That's true but dont married them
Here's what happened to me once when i was dating a single mother. We had plans to go to a special event. I made all the reservations and spent the money to buy the tickets and have my suit cleaned and pressed and my car washed and polished. I took the day off of work and offered to pay the babysitter. We'll the night arrived and I drove to her house and just as we were about to leave, her 6 year old daughter suddenly says "Mommy I don't feel good" and was acting sick. The mother automatically believed her and she said we couldn't go and sent the babysitter home after I paid her. So there I was. Out $200, pissed off as hell, and feeling like a fool being dressed to the hilt just to sit on her couch and watch TV. Of course, an hour later, the little shit is up running around and playing. We broke up a week or so later and I've been sworn off single mothers ever since.
They manipulaste their mothers so well that now even these ladies can see that but us. I totallt agree with you my Man. Ive been there
Your kids should always come before any man PERIOD!!!
@@bellmaze8356 that why never go with a single mother cause thats her kid not mine
@@peloleoj691 my husband married me with six kids whose father is deceased, he helped to raise my kids as his own, my kids loved and respected him as their father, he is now deceased, he was a husband and father that is hard to find in this day and time of selfish evil people. No kids ask to come here and all kids should be loved and protected by adults.
@@bellmaze8356 if the faher died thats a whole different story than if the father is still around
He forgot to mention the BIGGEST PROBLEM with dating a single mother: if you separate, you could be on the hook paying CHILD SUPPORT, even though you're not the biological father 😡😡😡
#9
Facts!! Your right know one is talking about that piece
Exactly this. Props for you if you want to make it work, but the risk doesn't make sense.
Boom 💣💣💣
Please explain to me how do you pay child support to a child who is not your biological child and your name is not on their birth certificate. I don’t know which country you are based but this doesn’t make any sense in the UK
MAN, he ain't lying. These women are ungreatful too. They just looking for help until them kids are grown so she can return to the streets.
The ungratefulness and entitlement is probably hardest for most men to deal with for sure 🫤🫤
@@vp2718 Just going off what I have seen in the last 40 years of my life.
Or maybe ,they are the real heroes,who Stay and take care of their children! Men always talks about some are from the streets ,but are the same man that belong to the streets as well
Don’t forget 9. Depending on how long you are married, if you divorce she may take you for child support even if the child isn’t yours.
-_- cause the child is yours
Stop being childish and sexist
Wow really?😮 that’s literally stealing
@@Anitadamjanic you think thats messed up , i recently seen a situation where a guy was engaged to a woman and he adopted the kid since they were gonna get married and be a happy little family and a few months later she ended the engagement and took him to court for child support cuz legally he was now the kids father.
@@stevenking997 some days i get so ashamed of being a woman. Women are our here stealing. Karma will come when their sons get the same treatment
@@Anitadamjanic just be a good one , no need to be ashamed! we def need good ones.
I agree with him totally. I dropped a guy who had a baby by another woman. No baby drama for me. I want a life of romance, not a life where the man is is fighting with the child's mother about one thing or another.
things goes both ways. but I seen women married a guy with 3 kids with different women and expected he is different. month later they are pregnant and single hoping to find a good man to love them!!
Real talk grow your own garden my mother always taught me
You are right 100% on this. I’m 59 years old. I married a woman with four kids when I was 38. They were all grown up and out of the house except a 15-year-old teenager. We got divorced 4 1/2 years later. Everything you said Is true and correct. I wish this kind of content was around 21 years ago. I would never have made that mistake. All you younger men who read this comment, listen to what this man is saying.
Noted
Yup
Sorry you went through all that man.
You did not marry a WOMAN you married a GIRL.
Absolutely spot on.
When my dad married my mother she had one child from a previous marriage and he had five children from a previous marriage. I was the only child between the two of them. It was a strong family where he treated her son as his own as she did with his children. She took care of him until the day he passed and I took care of her until the day she passed. And we are still a strong family so...
It's all in your maturity level and how you handle situations. Why tell others not to marry a woman who has children based on your own negative experience and outlook? Marry who you want to marry.
Your experience is 1 in 100k
One key word you used is “maturity”. Unfortunately everybody don’t have that. When the wife don’t have it and she can be just as immature as the children you got problems!!!
J what about the woman your dad was previously married to? He abandoned that home and the integrity of being the man of that household. Or did another man assume that responsibility?
@@igotloadz5812 both previous spouses died. Mom was a widow and Dad was a widower. Now what?💀
Well your situation ain't nothing like what he's talking about dude. Your parents didn't have other adults involved that were able to interfere with the other kid's decisions and the taking of sides. So it's a very different situation pal. Sorry for your loss.
My own brother is married to a single mother, and he told me not to get married to one. That’s all I needed to hear
As someone in the same situation he is right.
@@JeremysRantsis the reasons for you the same that was presented in the video? I’m dating a single mom of two and I’m probably going to break things off with her, just need some encouragement to do so
As an older man I co-sign this message . He is telling young men things that they need to hear to avoid heartache later in life and prepare for what may happen, yes there are success stories but there are far more failures. I personally know a young lady sweet divorced but the daughter doesn't want the mom seeing anyone and fabricated two incidences against me. Our friends of 30 years had to check the mom because they know I would have never and they know of the daughters manipulation. I really like the mom but at the end of the day is the juice worth the squeeze? moms always side with the kids
All fact's.i raised my step daughter from 2 to 16 all the effort ,finances, sick days, school, bonding, dance practices etc . Divorce and at 16 yrs old her mom told her "he is not your real father it's me or him" "I'm the only blood you have make your choice". Haven't heard from her since.. she is 24 now and still don't hear from her.. fellas it's not worth it
That is horrible to hear Brother.😳😳Thanks for sharing. 👊🏾
That's not right, but if you know you connected with your child (biological or not) that child knows it too. 🌟 🙏
Hey Bruh, I'm very sorry...I know it hurt you, still does I'm sure. But PLEASE move on and live YOUR life WITHOUT that burden. Again, sorry that happened to you.
I still have relationships with my ex wife kids divorced 2014 age 29-27-25 still looks up to me as father
@@salaminqueso7191 stop the nonsense. it is never a good idea to be a step father.
After my father died, my mom had 3 of us when she met my stepdad. My stepdad raised, loved, and disciplined us as if we were his own. He put all of us through college without complaints. He is a older man now, and doesn't get around like he use to. All of us take care of him gratefully as he invested his money and heart into taking care of us. Your advice is solely contingent on the type of parents, kids, and environment that has been structured. It doesn't apply to most situations.
Yea your experience doesn’t apply to most situations because most today are horrible along with it was a different time when you grew up to now. Not worth it today
No, it does apply to most situations. Yours is the exception, if it's to even be believed. Also you listed how you all and your mother benefitted but not how the stepdad benefitted. Typical. 👎🏿
No way you can tell me he wouldn't have had a better life, finding a young, nubile woman for himself, who could give him his own children. Something doesn't add up. You're obviously hiding something and not telling the whole story. He sounds like a doormat.
Beautiful!
@@charlesbyrd7873 unicorn situation
Actually it does apply to most or he couldn't speak on it
My best advice for us men is to love yourself be single, and don't date single women that have kids.
As a divorcee of a single mother, he told no lies.
I'm a childless female and I agree. These were the exact reasons I was never interested in dating men with preexisting kids.
Really?
🤡 detected
Give me a chance now.. Come on only 1 kid lol
Absolutely, I often wonder why women get with men with kids from previous relationships too.
It goes both way.
I call bs. These same reasons don’t apply to most men with children because most men don’t have primary custody of the children. Obviously the preference for most women would be without, but the overwhelming majority of women will not exclude getting involved with a man with children as long as he has the situation under control meaning he’s financially resourceful, he displays good character, and he doesn’t allow the mother of the child or children to create drama.
I am glad my dad did not share your feelings.
Thanks for the comment 😁👊🏾 But I think it would be more fair if you watch a more detail explanation on my thoughts th-cam.com/video/dImWy3VCvc8/w-d-xo.html
Let me know what you think 🤔 😁👊🏾
Hhhhhhhhhh
@@askanolderman✔️
@@DARWIISHAD you're rude
@@Peter-xu4fb thank you peter I wasn't expecting nothing else but me been rude
an that's my middle name
I am a single mom, and sadly, I eventually learned this is true (not for all)
what is your plan
if you are reasonable and sensible enough to see it youll probably find someone. i wish you luck. men are reasonable people, most of us dont operate in absolutes, if you have your life together and your lifestyle is that of a proper adult woman someone will notice.
So they shouldn't date YOU
@@mammymountain2057 So she’ll date an alien or what.. every woman needs a man and vice versa
@@vp2718 theres what people say, and theres what people do/respond to. i dont want to marry a single mom, but there is a part of me that responds positively to sensible, cooperative and wholesome women, fortunately and unfortunately im captive to it, and a lot of men out there are like that. the good thing is that in our time especially cooperative, sensible and wholesome single moms are super rare, so i can just make a blanket statement that i dont like single moms because ill never meet one, at least not in real life,--online in another continent or country is only where its possible. its a bit like women saying they dont like bad boys, but guess who they give free s3x giveaways to? or us sensible men saying we dont like sl*ts, but our worst nightmare is an honest sl*t who really likes us, then we just find ourselves saying yes.
Marriage is your journey don't let anyone destroyed your choice
Marriages are sets ups to failure, it can be 5,10 or 20 years, then your back being alone and done with
Black women choices are destroyed the second they have a child without marriage. This bd bm shit so crazy to me
I hear what OG is saying. Myself, I met my wife 30 years ago and we are still together. Our kids were 3 and 4 when we met. We have a third 18 year old together now in college. The older ones are now 35 and 34. Both married and successful. Of the 8 issues he spelled out I myself only had to deal with one of them and that one thing wasn't enough to break us up. Choose wisely and let your intentions and limits known before you commit. Show all of them love equally.
Indeed.
I made this very clear to my son. He doesn’t have any kids. Do NOT bring any single moms around me whatsoever. My husband and his uncles already know so if they don’t get pass them, they are completely done. Don’t bring any foolishness to my doorstep. I will shut it down immediately.
He met a girl who was homeschooled so she’s loud and out of control. She hasn’t been tainted by the world. My son says she’s still feeling her out so my husband will meet her 1st.
🤣🤣🤣 That’s what I am talking about. You got it right Arlene. Make sure he don’t get caught in that sticky web, these single mothers weave👊🏾👊🏾😁
Shut it down Mom! As you should.
But a woman can be a stepmother to your son's children?
Until your son marries and his wife dies then he is the single dad lol🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣you will be accepting the foolishness....
@Lovely Sheila that would be considered a widow. Completely different from a baby mama
Aren't they strong independent woman who doesn't need a man in their life?
Nah they got this...
My friend married a man with 8 children, she came.with 1 and they have 1 between both of them. She raised all the children , they went through all the stages go through. They all have decent careers. Took it from my friend who is an academic and an entrepreneur. Her husband worked a normal steady job,, never finished high school.
Now she tells those who criticized her for marrying an uneducated man, with 8 children, that she has lawyers, accountants, mechanical and civil engineers for her business and Doctors on call. All her children.
Never listen to other people when its comes to matters of love, follow your heart.
That is awesome, I love to hear these type of stories. But todays modern women don’t act like this. They have kids for monetary reasons. That is why we have the problems I described 😉
@@askanoldermankids for monetary reasons ??
I wouldn't listen to him because he has a lot of nagative things to say about women.
@@reginagolden3291right....but u watched the video, and commented on it. smh
They watched the video because it s intelligent and mature to form an opinion and comment after you've heard the other side to the story, instead of jumping to conclusions. Smh.
I’m so glad my step dad married my mom.
And u married?
I’m sure your mom was too. Good for your for mom for finding someone stupid enough to keep some one else’s responsibility.
My condolences to him
@@MrMathoks
You must have lots of friends.
@@MrMathoks
You need some more practice
My step kids will always be my babies with the parent are not . I am glad to be a positive memory to them one .
You will notice many women in the comments using shame and guilt to activate a mans inner Captain save-a-ho, be wary fellas
My dad (step-up father) married my mom with 3 children. He bought us 3 homes built from the ground. He just liked new stuff!! He is a great man who taught his boys how to be great men and his daughter wisdom and respect!! It's not always a bad narrative!!
Beautiful! Thank you
And it's only a good narrative when the pretend daddy spends countless resources and time on another man's bastards.
Preach
Was he white?
I hear soooo many stories like this. Bonus dads have changed the lives of girls and boys for the better. Glad they stepped up.
All these can happen even if it is your own child.
What about paying for somebody's child that's not yours. What about not being able to punish a child that's not yours.
Categorically false!!!!!
Most of what he listed, only could apply to being a step dad.
He's advising male genders NOT a female.
With you own child, if you raise them right at least you have a fighting chance to get things straighten out. I have a sister she was difficult witness mom & dad growing up. She finally come more around to dad better when she got in her mid twenties and with mom ebb & flowed. To me my observation, she wished mom to an early death.
Own child and married...
I dated a lady with one kid and I witnessed everything he said. I'll never do myself like that again
I'm sorry you had that experience. It must be hard to start loving a child that isn't biologically yours only to lose it in a break up.
@@debidawson7838 any pain a man feels brings joy and affirmation to every western cunt
It’s good to be honest with yourself. You don’t have the strength to commit to a single mother.
@@tringuyen7519 white knight!!! Knightly knight!! That’s right buster, you defend those those those sweeeeet loving single moms.. maybe someday you’ll get a kiss 🤣
I married a single mother for 10 years, had 3 more with her. we divorced now, and the children live with me, including her first one. But you are definitely right. Wont ever try that again.
Single Mothers = Netflix and Chill only
He's speaking wisdom. It is infuriating that people act like they don't understand principles of 'generally true,' and 'more likely than not.' It doesn't need to be true of every single mother. You may meet a tiger at an animal exhibit that you get to pet and touch without harm. Is that going to change your general disposition about loose tigers?!?!? NO!!! Generally speaking, it's not advisable.
Here's the main reason: It's not your responsibility to take care of another man's kid. Do not simp out for access to a woman.
Yeah but a lot of men are going for the mom so they overlook your "main reason"
This guy is right. You will never come first, and if those kids accuse you of anything sexual, you're going to prison, my friend.
😂😂😂
why in the world would that happen unless you actually have done something this is such a mute point and people are so sick these days
@@atthismoment3006 *Moot, not mute.
Perhaps don't try to be clever with your words if you don't even know how to construct a proper sentence in the first place.
Majority of comments here are men who raised another's child, not women who raised another woman's child.
Males are falsely expected to raise another's, yet majority of single women without children prefer not 🚫 to date men with children, and are not expected to.
I prefer no children, less drama.
I want to applaud this man for telling it like it is. Single mothers can be mad and stay mad! I married a single mother with two kids in my mid 20's and it was true hell! It's not worth it in my book. Like the guy in the video said, "you're on the bottom of the list concerning everything". When she got mad, she would tell her kids "don't speak to him" Of course they listened to their mother. Bottom line up front: Fellas, LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!!!!!
probably just have a little fun a leave!
Had a guy that on a second date showed up at my apartment door with his son. I don't have kids, never had kids and never wanted kids. I told him I'm not his mother, take him home and never come back. As a single woman with no kids, why do single father's think we want to be bothered with their kids??!!
Girl shut yo lying ass up. No men or single father behave this way. Your story would be more believable if you was the one tht brought your child over.
@@beats-by-skrill8925 I'm not a girl. And he did bring his kid to my home. I'm a baby boomer and men of my generation still kinda did things with their kids, not just make them and leave them to their mother's to raise and take care of and do things with.
There was a time when I may have been willing to date a single mother. But since then I've researched marriage statistics, divorce court laws, and just generally opened my eyes as to how the majority of single mothers treat the men they get involved with. The men are often used at nothing more than a utility. I'm not talking about every individual case, I go my the norm, not the exception. And with that, I no longer have an interest in dating a single mother.
My parents are still happy together after 45yrs, my mom had 3 children before marrying my dad and they had 3 of us together... We are 6 and couldn't have asked for better older siblings (my sister and 2 brothers), I'm 43 n now married to a man who has a son before marriage and we have 3 more kids together... And they love their big brother.
Eww Degeneracy
Idk bro. I was a single dad with two kids. My wife had one. We linked up and while tuff we made this work. Now we raise our teen we made and our other kids are grown now. No mans words should dictate your choices or path. You have the wheel.
You're an exception to have found the right woman . Most single moms aren't like that . Stop giving delusional advises
@@bindutiwari4263 ong he a clown 🤡
@@bindutiwari4263 How about you stop trying to write in english
@@marylureeves4715This is a male advisory channel.
@@ronahemara-wahanui2383This is a male advisory channel.
Single mothers shouldn't be taken seriously for a relationship. No pros with all of the cons.
4. Literally happened to me and ruined my life! STAY AWAY FROM SINGLE MONSTERS AT ALL COST
My brother has been married close to 30 years with a woman who had 5 kids before him. 3 of them were still minors when they got married. It depends on the woman if she's willing to work with him and vice versa.
He’s talking about PROBABILITY not POSSIBILITY. Most of the time being a stepfather doesn’t work out.
For every situation that worked out there are 5 to 9 that didn't.
5 kids??? Goddamn that man must have been in desperation. No thanks
@@TheNissandd 🤣🤣
@@TheNissandd Love is love.
I know a woman who is well into her 40’s who is raising her husband’s little girl because the mother had passed. She take her role as a step-mother seriously. In this case, it seems like she could adopt if she wanted to. When the child is really young it can sometimes be easier.
I don’t want a single mum after seeing these videos 😂😂😂
I'm a single mother of 4 cuz of domestic violence and i agree with him 💯
You will end up leaving her for the same reason her children's father left her...
You're assuming he's the one who left!
Maybe he died
@@willgridahmahiaini You are right dear - that statement was describing a different scenario - a widow is always a homemaker.
@@mahad9555 She could also have left his lazy abusive backside 😇
Truth
@@willgridahmahiaini which means she doesn't know how to vet a man in the first place which usually means a lack of both situational awareness and social awareness and should be avoided at all cost.
This gentleman is telling the truth! I would never advise anyone to marry anyone with kids.
This is a wise man. I am 48 when I was a young man my father and grandfather told me the same thing. Invest in the seed you planted so it becomes a tree full of fruit. Don’t wasting your resources on something you didn’t plant.
Facts, I feel parents should date parents. If you aren't a parent don't settle for a single mother or a dude with kids already. You deserve to be first with a clean slate!
My recommendation as well👍🏾😁
It’s not about deserve. It’s about if you can. It’s about who you meet and whether you want to give him or her up. Deserve implies that it is something inherently bad.
I’m soO Thankful that JOSEPH, MARY and JESUS NEVER had this problem ❤
for real👍
Boom!!! Shout out to the awesome stepdads out there!
Amen Aware75
It’s not fair that Jesus never got to suffer this way but we as the new generations of humans have to
Joseph and Mary had other children after Jesus. Mary not having other children is a Catholic Church false doctrine like the same as Mary ascended to heaven which is another lie. 😊 There is proof in the Bible of Jesus having siblings
We’ve normalized it because there are so many single mothers with children. Most men aren’t in a financial position to take on the responsibility
To add to number 7, the baby father will always have access to her and her box. Once she conceives another man’s child, that attachment cannot ever be broken.
I loved my stepfather. He was hardworking, handsome and kind. I am glad he did not take your advice.
Must have been a rare case where your mom actually cared for him it must have been nice he was blessed with a family
And now he is gone from the gene pool lol
For real!
I understand hardworking and kind, but why describe your step father as handsome? maybe some Jerry Springer action going on 😏
@@aceboogie7550 Alabama
The eighth is the one concerning. You will never be first in that relationship. It's always the child before you.
Umm damn straight. Even if you're that said child's father you're no longer #1 because that's called being a good nurturing mother. If the man respects the woman for this he in turn will never see anyone in the family being rated #1 or #2.. because she will make kids and man #1 in a sense. But just remember this takes the man doing his part. More times than not that's where the problems come into a couples relationships... the supposable man acting like a child and showing a slight sign of Jealousy of a woman's children even if the man is the ACTUAL father of the children. No man would ever make a woman feel like she needs to pick between her man and her babies. It's not rocket science. Simple common sense.
Same for bio kids tho🤦🏽♀️
@@libragal815 no you're just using and abusing the man as a piggy bank you never disrespect the man he provides while you complain
But even if you are the child's fathers you're still not number one
That goes both ways No father should actually want to put his woman or wife before his child Nor should a real man want to be placed before the child
I married a single mother but I would tell me sons not to.
To the 7 dudes this worked out for..great & congratulations 👏🏽! The Man STARTS with “I would not ADVISE”. Wish i had considered all this before i ONCE did it. No truer words spoken.
PS, if your relationship with a single mother turned out so great, why would you even click on the video?? 🧐☝️
Right obliviously there’s some insecurity there.
😂😂😂😂 His experience isn’t yours! Remember that. ❤
exactly and women marry single dad's all the time
I agree with everything he said 😆😂
🤦🏾♂️🥴😭
It’s not worth the risk
🌬️✊🏿✔️👍🏿👌🏾👀
I saw it happen with a friend of mine, he worked so hard and gave them the life they could only dream of before and he was kind, loyal, and an amazing father to those children and the only father they ever knew, she had a sister in rehab and she went to visit her and it turned out her ex-bf was there as well and she cheated on him for that ex, a 10-year relationship gone within the span of a couple of hours, after that she took whatever she could from him and left and NEVER let him see those kids, they were his sons and daughter in every way that truly mattered, it’s appalling to see step-parents that are more of a parent than their biological parents get their heart ripped out of their chest because their ex-SO is angry with them, don’t do it to yourself.
To me, the 4th point is very dangerous! If the child is troublesome and does not like you because she's bitter about her father's absence, you can easily end up in jail on trumped up charges or she'll destroy the marriage one way or another.
A female friend of mine introduced a single mother friend of hers to me (her child is now grown up and in her early 30s - a teacher by profession, single herself, very emotionally attached to her mom and staying with the mom!)
Eventually, I had to back out of the idea. The woman's daughter is a stunner - too beautiful for my comfort. In fact, I fell in love with the daughter the very moment I set eyes on her picture on phone. I didn't even bother to meet her in person because I knew it would be difficult not to betray my admiration for her even in the presence of her mother.
After meeting up with the said woman and exchanging phone numbers, I backed off. I hate scandals and couldn't stand the thought of going after the daughter instead of the mother. That was about 5years ago and I'm still single. Never called the woman on phone nor passed by her place though I ply her road everyday and not too far from my place.
Number 4 happened to a friend of mine a little over 12 years ago. He was accused of Grapping one of his then girlfriend's female children and had to spend 3 months in jail until they sorted it out. The authorities eventually released him (if he was guilty he would have been sent to prison), but he lost everything.
Not only did he lose everything (car, apartment, job, etc.) but during his time in jail a local news station got ahold of the story an blasted his face on the evening news as a CP.
He was forced to leave the state, because even though he was cleared his reputation was ruined. He couldn't even sue because the alleged accuser was underaged.
It just isn't worth the risk to get involved with single mothers.
I feel for the children. Obviously, there are people who have a negative experiences and others who don’t. I’m sure my brother is wholeheartedly grateful for becoming a step father as he later on adopted his wife’s children and he views them as his children because they are. Those children deserve more and better and if the biological father isn’t going to step up or is unable to and provide that I am joyful another man who is well-equipped will. The children deserve more and better outside of the parents drama or situations.
What most women like you don't understand is those children are not his bloodline
all these sappy stories don't make up for the fact he would be better to start his own family. if the biological father doesn't step up that's single mommies problem. I feel for the suckers out here picking up the scraps from baby daddies.
So some men won’t step up so why she carried that loser baby for 9 months. You women lack critical thinking. Only know how to snake men smh losers
That goes both ways it's worse when you're dealing with baby mama drama. My sister has no children dated a guy with children it was a catastrophe. I truly believe it's a case by case basis every blended family don't go through that. I'm married to a wonderful man and he's not the father of any of my children but all of my children respect him because I've raised them with The WORD of God, morals, values, and how to be self-responsible
Oh and by the way older doesn't always mean wiser, I know some young wise men and I also know some old fools
That is true too I hope she finds better sorry to hear bout her
I marry a single mother of 3 beautiful girls who respect me as their dad.....
And GOD bless me with twin two boys.... We live as a family....
Preach!!!
There may be case-by-case exceptions, but it is generally not advisable.
Na women don't have money
Resources going into another man’s DNA… do not want.
I'm from Ghana and I just paid my brother's step son's school fees. Love for humanity first before anything else Sir.
That is not what I am taking about. Watch my long videos and learn more my brother.
@@askanolderman Jesus Christ had a stepfather.
@@singlemamanodrama4546 😂😂😂😂 just marry before you carry.
@@partingalano What makes you think that I wasn't married or that my husband didn't die or that I didn't adopt my relatives? Go ahead and cast judgement on me and my character to make yourself better. Just because I am a single mother, that doesn't make you any less broke. lol, lol, lol.
@@singlemamanodrama4546 what you are or aren't doesn't affects me LMAO.... the deflection.
Bringing your jesus to this mess is pathetic... you never married you sound like all these single mamas trying to make their case as special... no it's not.
You were never married, you know damn well.
Don't I know it! All of my relationships were with single mothers. A nightmare and PTSD side-effects.
Why not date childless women?
Amen amen amen. They damn sho have some issues bruh. Not all but damn near all of them do. Secretly they'll b thinking of the kids father and n some cases they'll b wishing he hadn't dumped them and moved onto another woman. Real talk. Sho nuff sho nuff
@@VargasAtlanta Do you know how rare tht is out here??? Especially if the guy is already in his age of 30's.
@@beats-by-skrill8925 You're right. I just don't know why men date women with kids by MULTIPLE men. One father is enough.
*”exception is unless that kids father passed away and the mother is a widow” ☝🏾💯 - MELL DUNEY 616*
Even with the bio dad dead a stepdad can run into some of these same problems especially not coming before the kid(s). I know there are some exceptions but I wouldn't advise this for any man whether father is dead or alive.
Still a no go. You’re still going to have the same problems. You’re still going to be spending your time energy and resources raising another mans child. Under no circumstances date a single mother.
not true . the mother that have kids dont give fuck about the husband
I am a single mother and I totally agree with this man. I personally think that the courts should award custody of children to the father and make the mothers pay child support. I think this would solve a whole lot of problems. I told my son to never marry a single mother. I stopped dating when I found out I was pregnant. The major reason I stopped was as a single mother my child has to always come first. No one should have any child that isn't theirs come before them. In addition I would advise all females to never date single fathers. Single parents need to stay single, period.
If every women thinks like this im 10000% more men will marry single mothers the bigest problem is that si'gle mothers do't accept that they are in a disatvatage over childless single women
This is the opposite of my household. My fiancé said he never felt so taken cared of and loved until i came into his life. He says my daughters treat him like a king. They cook, clean and are obedient. Some of these negative men are cluster b or dismissive avoidant. Being negative is all they know.
There are exceptions though there is a small percentage.
I raised a stepchild for 17 yrs just to be disrespected by her when she became a teenager. It was all good when she was little but they both made it clear that I'm not her father. I've never been so disrespected in my life. Big mistake.
Thanks for sharing Brother. 👊🏾😁
Teenage girls mostly don't like either parent anyway. You have to let them adjust to there new hormones and how to handle them. They come back around eventually. Don't take it so personal, she'll put it in perspective one day.
@@dmslater30 What. Women plz. If she to old for a belt across her behind. Yall can live on the street, go disrespect the Crack heads at the women's shelter since she can't get her hormones in check 🤷🏾♂️
Man sorry to hear that. May God be with you. Thanks for warning the younger Men. This country really doesn't impower Men of the house. I'm dealing with just a wife it's difficult but I can't imagine what u went through 🙏🏽
I would never chose a woman with daughters. I chose one woman with two boys. The oldest boy thought he was going to be my problem. I said to myself; oh no you won’t be my problem you will be your momma & your daddy problem. Not long after that I was gone!!! My favorite word in the English language “Gone”!!!!
I think women can use this advice as well. I wish I knew you before I got married. I would have heeded this advice. Too many problems when the other person has a child and you don't. Preach on.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Yeah y'all can can't lie it goes both ways
I’m so glad I never married or made serious life choices at a young age and screwed myself financially. Some would say, “oh you’re missing out” or some other bullshit but I’ve learned so many things from listening to older men who’ve made those mistakes and can admit their errors and how to avoid them in the future. Thanks to all the real men helping the rest of us avoid the emotional and financial pitfall that is the average American woman. Not all but average.
I'm one of those men, and you're not missing out on anything good.
As a husband of a single mother I can cofirm all of the advices. Cannot understand why there is no spontanious sex, but there was not, all of the time. Seems no intention too. Also seems I screwed myself many years ago...
Now, I'm in my worst crisis in my life because of that and she asked me not to leave her...
Man I see the single mothers are triggered in the comments section, emotional when facts are being spoken here......
The world is all about emotions and feels my friend🙄🙄🙄. Men should not pickup a women after she has made poor decisions. If a man went to prison for some shit he did in his past, she would consider rejecting his ass as well. 😏😏
That step child and the baby daddy will upset that house hold and man #2 would be at a disadvantage due the fact the babies daddy having say in that house hold.
@@askanolderman ... Therein lies thr problem gents.... a lot of women utterly and completely lack accountability for their piss poor decision and choice making... don't be captain save a H*E..
I have never been happier than the family I got when I married my friend who has two daughters. I've known her and the girls for the longest time. Her ex and I get along very well.
I look at the girls as daughters, not as "an investment in another man's DNA". That line of thinking is ridiculous. I went "all in" for my family, and left a very promising Army career to be able to stay with my family.
God blesses you!You are a good man!
"Her ex and i get along very well" keep coping my dude, you are just getting cucked from behind
It is a male advisory channel as he says and that’s solid advice. Take your emotions out of it and listen to the logic in his argument. It’s a bad deal for most men especially for a man with no children. I had to talk my best friend out of moving out of state with a single mom who had 4 young kids and he had none. I wasn’t going to idly stand by and let him destroy his life by jumping out the window like that. He thanked me for it later.
What if you have kids? Still sucks I think
@@tspice11 Single mothers are for single fathers
Same applies to baby daddies. Women, dont marry babby daddies they are either sleeping with their X or baby mama drama will come through. Plus, he'll never be yours fully coz his heart will belong to his kid and a piece of it to his baby mama. Also, the child support will cut into both of your finances. So you'll have to worker extra hard to make up for it.
Marry singles yall!
Facts
Yep maybe there's a rare 20% but it is quite rare to find decent relationships with single parents
There's a distinction between baby daddy and single father. We don't get automatic custody. A man who has full custody of his children is a good guy. A baby daddy hardly sees their kids, so he has time to be in the streets.
@@aceboogie7550 dont forget men who get custody of the kids to punish the woman
@@geemai435 courts generally give kids to the mom. For the dad to get full custody she has to be down bad on paper and in real life. Guardian ad litems and judges don't just sever the mother child connection like that. The presiding presumption is tender years doctrine. If they weren't married the father has a long way to go to establish his custodial rights.
And if the father wants 50 50 custody what's wrong with that? You want to just be an atm and an every other weekend dad?
Spread the word and save the young guys from making this big mistake…just because they are easy does not mean they are worth it…
Thanks Brother, I will try to spread as much as I can without getting cancelled😅😅Well said regarding easy vs worth it👍🏾
SPREAD THE WORD to WEAR SOME DAMN CONDOMS & stop squirting yall seeds everywhere. It starts with yall, but too narrow minded to see it. Don't want 2b fathers, but too stupid to prevent it. No, don't ask a woman to get an abortion . . .THATS AZZ BACKWARDS!!!!
@@askanolderman you won't get cancelled as I see your advice is genuine and it is the truth. There are exceptions but the majority of these situations are difficult. It goes both ways too. The man's children can never really respect his wife and even if they did , there is always that enmity lurking. Some men and women get into such relationships without knowing the consequences so it is good that you are educating them. Atleast if anyone is willing to be a step father or mother they know what to most likely expect.
I was a single mom of two when i get remarried, and i have no kids of him, but he loves them both and treat them well, and they too do the same. He proposed to know their father and to be in touch with him in order to confort him about the girl...never got real big prb, we're just happy family
He's so correct. I married one with a daughter. When I was younger. She end up being a golddigger and thru me under the bus. Not good ordeal. Unless your older and the kids are out of the home then there is a possibility. Good video 😉😉
I had a child when I married my exhusband. He’s remarried but when my son left for college his father dropped him off and my exhusband picked him up for Christmas break. There’s still a bond. My ex is a great dad to our daughter and his “son”. There’s always an outlier.
This man speaks the truth.
Yes
The biggest mistake a woman can make is to become a single mom except in cases where there is the death of the spouse or a divorce. Being a single mom limits your chances of finding a partner in the future as there are a whole group of men who will never date a single mom like myself. I’d rather stay single than date a single mom. Don’t want to deal with all the baggage. Ladies, choose carefully who you sleep with so you don’t regret it in the future.
This goes for the single fathers as well!
How many single fathers HAVE asked you out?
85 to 90% of custody goes to women. for every single dad you come across, we come across 10 single moms. it's not even worth bringing up.
Most men don't have kids.
Also there is a popular thing on the internet where women are trying to go for top earners 6 figures $1/4 million a year. The people at the top tend to be married and the exception to those are the divorcees but you don't find unattached Child free men who are top earners that is not the trend go to any org chart the men at the top not out of 10 times are married and the one out of 10 is a divorcee typically not a single Bachelor.
It would be 16% of the black male population that this argument would apply to furthermore the top earners who would be men in their 40s and 50s and 60s of any race have kids and are typically married an exception would be if there are a divorcee
So no not the same thing for single fathers if you want the high earners they're generally going to have kids unless they divorced out of a marriage with no kids
Mostly women have primary custody, so you probably won’t see his kids anyway!
When the sentence start with "I HAVE THE UTMOST RESPECT" whatever that follows is atomic
I'm glad there are subtitles because I couldn't hear his muffled voice. Anyway. He's absolutely right.
Thanks for this great advice, as men mature and cultivate their worth, noticeable shifts occur in how women perceive and interact with them. It's crucial to remain steadfast in our purpose, dedicated to building a family guided by our faith. While love is a powerful force, it's essential to maintain a vigilant stance. We are, at our core, a spiritual family before a physical one. Prioritizing the well-being of our loved ones includes assessing their mental state, though it's important to recognize that it isn't our duty to solve all their problems or assume a parental role. Life is meant to be lived authentically, maximizing experiences for personal growth, fulfillment, and freedom. May God bless our journeys, amen."
Never marry a single mother with small children that are not yours. Unless there is a true understanding between all parents involved.
My assets are the reason I refuse to get married!
And you are not wrong, but there are ways to protect your current assets before you get married. Look into that instead of staying single. In the end, you can’t just die with these assets, you need a legacy Brother👊🏾
Agreed and I don't even make that much,
Smart man 👨
The only single mom best to marry is the one who's widow.period.
I'm my dad's first born and he married a single mother. It worked out. My older sister was an older teenager and moved out a few years after they got together. Not to say it was easy for my pops but they're still married and raised me and my little sister together