My Vulnerability Story
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ก.ย. 2024
- A lot of the people I know, see me as a very honest person and I try to hold that up as much as I can. I have always valued vulnerability and sharing a perspective for a lot of reasons, but I have seen first hand of the benefits it can have on you as a person and the people around you. So in return this video represents some of that.
In other words, this is me and a big part of my story. I've heard plenty of times to hide any vulnerability but I've always disagreed and shown differently lol
Anyways, if you are new.... Welcome. I've mentioned the "Alone Era" few times in this video so just for a little more context here is a older video I made:
• The Alone Era
Your suffering "has deepened you" as they say. So that's lovely to see.
Your words and vulnerability during your story has been very moving and comferting for me. About 9 or 10 years ago, I moved from tennessee to Michigan which was horrible for my mindset since I had created super close friends that I ended up loosing. I changed schools a few more times and repedidly kept loosing friendships that I was making which led to me beeing very shy and introverted for years. Covid had made the "tipical highschool experiance" impossible for me to have and I was constantly dealing with lack of lonelyness and people who cared about me. At one point I had a suicidal partner and a suicidal best friend which was... awful, draining, and heartbreaking in every possible way. Everything at that time was just constant pain and burnout for me. I lost understanding of who I was and was constantly burdening myself with other people's problems as a way to "cope" which kept causing more pain for myself. Eventually, I was able to come out of that mindest about a year ago (right after highschool). Today, I am no where near perfect, but I try my best to keep a positive, forward seeking mindset no matter how good or bad of a day that I've had. I've finally achieved some awesome friends who I know genuenly care about me and I've found a good ground to confidently be myself. I still stuggle with my past memories and experiances on the daily, but I've realized that I've come a long long way to get to where I am today. If you made the "Alone Era" discord community, I'd happily join to share my life experinces and help others who need someone to hold their hand and be overal there for them. Thank you for your existance Karima. I hope to whoever reads this is having a great day. :)
8:45 when you said you gained great friends the sun projected a starburst pattern
We're proud of you sharing your vulnerable side! You've told us that despite everything, you're still human, fallible like all of us.
It sounds like loneliness was a harsh teacher to you...
The empathy you've learned- share it with us! ✨
If we went to same schools or in the area and you ask me to be your friend I would MOST DEFINITELY be your friend as a good person I am you seem pretty cool and chill and have interesting topics. Don't beat yourself up you lots of ambitious goals. Ive been in alone era as myself and till this day i feel like it has not change sometimes isolation is God protection and you have peace and be able to do more in life
good on you for listening to yourself and taking a leap year
So super proud of you!!!! You are so very beautiful and amazing and such an awesome person!!!!!
This is very noble of you to share, I’m subscribed!
I relate with this a lot especially since due to me pursuing day trading i had no other option but to cut off my so called friends…and it’s been this way for years even dating has been dog shit due to how much focus I need to put into achieving what I truly want. Doesn’t help that growing up I’ve always been introverted…now at 25 it’s crazy tough to build meaningful relationships with people. In the bright side I’m for sure seeing my dreams take shape now tho…starting to think the saying “it’s lonely at the top” is very much the truth. Hope one day I can find people I truly relate with tho.
This is going to sound a little blunt and weird but something I like to say is "You are not special". It's not that you are not unique but you are not alone. The fact that you do feel this way, most likely means there is someone else in the world who can connect to that too. This is why I think sharing and talking about it, is important. Most people are afraid to open up because of the possibility it will make them feel more alone.
P.S.: Connection can't be forced and once you feel like you don't need anybody, life has it's weird way of having people show up. (I'm sure you already know this but sometimes you need to be reminded of the things you know.)
Hope you get a win on your next trade!
@@AlsoknownasBK appreciate you
There are so many layers on this video. As I watched it, the word "Anhedonia" kept popping in my mind; believe me I can relate. If I could give you some practical advice beyond the very stoicism I sense from you. From a person who has recently moved to a new country to start over and knows no one here: if you can, hit the gym, strengthen your body (and mind, helps a lot with dopamine levels), take magnesium and omega 3, along with plenty of water and again, if you can, eat leaves every day. I've been doing all that for a while along with an almost strict time management work and I have been harvesting result even though I spend most of my time alone. The things I feel tend to be the natural response of what my body needs. That results in having great nights sleeps, eating healthy food at the right time, willingness to exercising and to work... All that comes "naturally" because the your body and mind and in sync and aligned, cultivating as much good habits as possible unveils an amazing paradigm of balance and normality, if you will. Take care.
Anhedonia is a great way of explaining of how I felt at the time. I definitely think it was big part of my experiences but it was more like overload burnout to neglect burnout which lead to rediscovery and starting from scratch. I tried a lot of things to get back on my feet including health and nutrition (weightlifting / high-protein diets) but because of travel and space I often lost consistency which lead to a constant fluctuation of my progress. I do try to keep going though, and see the mental benefits of everything you have mentioned. Thank you for sharing :)
@archadeinteriors
why did you move out into the boonies when you were in your senior year of high school (is that correct? ) if so that was really bad and inconsiderate timing by your parents or whatever happened, Anyway try not to be too vulnerable, just hang in their when times are tough and you'll be fine, being transparent and vulnerable isn't necessarily going to help you, but at the same time being totally open to talk, share, and express yourself about anything and everything is totally fine, good, or normal and healthy, don't call it vulnerability. You 're fine and awesome, not vulnerable, hope you have a happy and blessed day : D !
I have a different experience, but similar in some aspects. When I was 12-15 my family traveled and moved abroad. Then after coming back to our country we moved to another city. So when most people at that time build those puberty friendships, I either didnt have them or I was forced to let go of them multiple times when changing environments and deal with that emotionally. Also deal with not being accepted when coming back. Well, biggest human super power is adaptation... I'm good at not developing attachment to people I meet. Has its pros and cons. Ultimately we are social creatures so it has more cons. I've definitely experienced this feeling of being tired, caused by periods of lack of socializing. Actually I go throgh one rn, but maybe it's for good, negative emotions are a good motivation too ;) Wonder if you see yourself as a lone soul and introverted, if thats your self image. Because if you felt negative impact of being lonely to that degree, then this image is probably not true at all, it was just a circumstance, rather than your true nature :)
I can relate to not becoming attached and rather a loner when it comes to work. A lot of the times I noticed that I much rather have people become acquaintances than friends because growing up it was already expected that most wouldn't stick. I found myself becoming very cold and distant, most viewing me as "chill" or just straight up arrogant. I personally started to hate that about myself and admired the ones that can jump of excitement at something small like getting flowers. The ones "in love with life".
At one point, I did use the negative emotions as fuel and thrived but the hit you get from realizing that everything can be taken away is beyond humbling and eventually the negative thinking goes towards oneself and end up being lonely instead of Alone. At least that was the case for me. It's hard to find a balance and everyone has their own ig lol
@@AlsoknownasBK Yeah, arrogant... in my case that's the first impression I often make. Then I also seem to be often attracted to girls that are more outgoing and lighthearted than me. It's like longing for the opposite to me, cold attracted to hot. But the fun stuff is that this "extroverted energy" is most of the time also a front those people have. For example a girl I knew was like that. She came back home from university, 5 minutes and she needed to call somebody to talk. If she called her whole contact list and nobody had time or could pick up, she immediately needed to open the TV, so something was "talking in the background" XD She just couldn't cope with being on her own like introverts can. So ultimately, her being outgoing and talkative, was also a form of escape.
There's this book about positive/negative motivation. It's called "Focus" by Heidi Grant Halvorson and Tory Higgins. They call it promotion VS prevention focus and conclude that it's mostly about our upbringing. But also that we don't have the same motivation focus in every field. Somebody can be very promotional in relationships (like jumping from partner to partner), but then be very failure preventive in their career (like air traffic controller).
I think that there needs to be some level of acceptance. I don't think it's possible to change completely from preventive mindset to promotional one or the other way around. Instead it might be better to look for people that compliment our strengths. But those people also tend to push us and test our boundaries, while finding somebody that's the same as us, can feel safe.
For example, a promotional person that has lots of enthusiasm, but jumps from project to project, will be pushed nad possibly irritated by a preventive person that values details. Separately, promotional person can open 5 projects at the same time and finish three lousily, while the preventive one could have trouble starting even one ;) Together, they might create something good.
You’re giving me inspiration to one day make a video just like this btw…I will shout you out if I ever do decide to follow through with the idea. 🙏🏾
I would watch it 😌🤝 I think it's important to show the struggles as much as the successes, if not more.
@@AlsoknownasBK yes I’ll try to make it happen one day
@@AlsoknownasBK also make sure to drop that discord
@@Insectist Once it's out, I sure will🤝
I also tend to procrastinate a lot too, its really just about starting.
There are many tricks that can help out. Personally, I started wearing a hat, using sound proof headphones, listen to classical music, and remove any glares on to my computer to focus. I also start with a 5 minute timer then ignore it just so I start. Otherwise doing something that you hate more than task you are procrastinating or can't focus on helps out too lol
500 subs yayy !
It feels unreal! 😁🤍
Thanks for sharing
🧚Hi i love you 💚 i am from Indian 🇮🇳
Nice video 👍
Hi Hello
You got braces out, good.
Beautiful woman with ugIy language.
That's fair. When it comes to honesty I find cursing easier to express more accurately since it is understood by the entire world and multiple languages. Believe it or not, I used to be a lot worse but either way I apologize if it made you uncomfortable😌
I like her language
@@AlsoknownasBK It also divides half the world. I stopped watching after your words changed and I wouldn't let my kids listen to or watch your videos. "Bad words" are a lazy form of expressing yourself.
My comment wasn't to mock or to go against your experience. I'm a big fan of online school...my son just graduated with honors this year. But bad language is like an ugly tattoo, except you can choose not to use it and people will respect you more for finding better ways to speak.
I can understand that, and I appreciate your honesty. I don’t curse often. It honestly comes down to light humor among peers and to help express the most honest as well as vulnerable side. I am aware of the fact that it does divide a lot of people around the world but the ones that need it the most respond to cursing. You are also right that it is a form of self expression (it may be lazy but is valid). Most people do curse, and every time it shows a side that is real and not fabricated (may it be pleasant or not). I prefer to look at how often you do it and when because that says a lot about your character. I wouldn’t trust someone who hasn’t curse at least one around me but that is our personal difference.
Either way, I’ll consider your perspective as a mom and about what you have said and continue to working on improving speech and sentence structure.
P.S.: Congratulations to your son. Not everyone adjusted well to being moved to Cyberschooling. I personally loved it for it’s flexibility and stability as well as support. I missed it during my late homeschooling.
@@faisalcheema3017 You are obviously a very hurt individual. You put words on the screen that I didn't write. I was even commending her.
Believe it or not, speaking intellectually was a thing up until about 20 years ago, and now look at the world. I want her words to travel as far as they can, but using vulgarity does not travel well and does less for her as she becomes a part of the social fabric.
TH-cam is the internet. If an employer found this it could harm her prospects.
But really, condemn me for my thoughts while raising her for her own? Do you know the word for that?