NKB has characterized Patrician as being a propagandist, a cult leader and a snake oil sales man, leading me do conclude that Pat is both Dutch Van Der Linde AND Nigel West-Dickens.
Starfield did the one thing I thought wasn't possible. It woke Bethesda fans up to the fact that they're not excited for a new game, they're excited for a new sandbox with better physics and graphics so they can make more realistic sex mods.
@@8ligh7 a bunch of them did. I remember the skyrim coop modder saying he started working on the mod but the game is so boring and miserable he just noped out. This time modders will not "save" the game. They never did previously tbh, they just made it a bit less dogshit.
@@8ligh7 The bigger problem is that the newer engine supposedly fucks with modding. Any two mods even if they modify two totally unrelated aspects of the game may require a patch.
Reminds me of a joke...A man goes to a doctor. “Doctor, I’m depressed,” the man says, "the youtubers are harsh, unforgiving, cruel". The doctor lights up. The treatment, after all, is simple. “The great game designer Emil Pagliarulo has released his new game,” the doctor says, “Go play it! That should sort you out.” The man bursts into tears. “But doctor,” he says, “I am Emil Pagliarulo.”
It's insane just how much NKB behaves as if he's vicariously Emil, specifically referring to the part where he wished Emil would file a defamation suit against Patrician, and the near crying at the "over a video game. Good job guys" part.
A man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says doctors are harsh and cruel. "Go see Dr. Doctor, that should cure you". Man bursts into tears. "But Doctor... I am Doctor."
efap was like my first relationship with podcasts, i thought it was just for me and we were perfect, back in the jared days. We, grew apart, and now i’ve been hearing you’ve been seeing new people, i’ve moved on too, but i still, miss you.
My new gal STAG is quite nice but I always look back when you were into wolf and think about what could have been if things went differently, but I guess that's life. Sometime it is just not meant to be. I'm happy for you things worked out for you. Although I think STAG left me for you. Not sure why or what I did wrong. I only know thinking about you too always makes me really really ., excited
Timestamps 0:21 Welcome! 1:20 Backstory 18:03 Fringy Is Here! 20:18 The Video Starts 22:50 Opinions & Reviews 27:42 Joseph Anderson 30:56 Experts & Opening 38:00 Drop-shadows & Misrepresentation 42:08 Is This A Trap? 51:09 The Talk 58:15 Do You Know Me? 1:02:45 Emil (1) 1:20:22 Internet Faliure Break 1:21:57 Emil (2) 1:23:04 The Biden Moment 1:24:33 Emil (3) 1:32:28 Subway 1:34:55 Revenge Of The Siths 1:36:35 Run Sam Run 1:38:05 Fallout 1:40:27 Spokespersons & Writers 1:45:18 Emil(4) 1:50:32 Peck vs Touch 1:59:20 The Speech 2:55:28 Intros 2:58:21 After The Speech 3:03:19 Harassment 3:08:38 Emil’s Tweet 3:15:49 Public Speaking & The Response 3:41:27 The End Of The Introduction 3:44:59 A Reasonable Reddit Post 3:50:50 The Trial Of Creetosis 5:45:05 Erin Moriarty 5:49:19 Shame On You, Creetosis! 6:14:30 Zaric Zhakaron 6:27:18 Patrician TV (1) 6:30:37 Space Hopper & Todd Howard 6:51:46 Patrician TV (2) 7:01:50 Pizzatime 7:02:53 Patrician TV (3) 7:12:52The GDD 7:18:35 Patrician TV (4) 7:51:38 ART 7:54:05 Patrician TV (5) 10:15:50 Plagiarism 10:27:42 This is what you're looking for 10:40:20 The Situation 10:46:10 Twitter Troubles 11:09:50 Asmongold TV 11:14:22 Emil Is A Normal Person 11:22:55 Closing? 11:23:50 Defamation 11:24:55 Creetosis 11:27:24 Patrician TV 11:28:50 Last Words
@@coolvibesradio3267 Thanks for the comment! My intention with the timestamps was to enhance navigation and make it easier for viewers to jump to specific sections. However, I can definitely understand how they might not be everyone's cup of tea. Could you maybe elaborate on what specifically makes them feel disruptive? That might help me improve, adjust them, or reconsider their future publication.
@JulianDoe I really appreciate the time stamps, I think the other guy is basically saying that a lot of people will just click the time stamps and look for what's funniest or entertaining to watch thus losing some context and having massive gaps in watch time.
The bit Mooler timestamped is gold but I just want to shoutout the bit at approx 10:35:25 where Patrician says it might be based on something that happened to NKB and Mauler is just '...OK'.
I can't believe Pat was so upset about his underwhelming first episode of EFAP that he mind controlled NeverKnowsBest into making this video so he'd have ample content to cover Just how much more unhinged can he get?
First of all, thank you for bringing Pat back. He didn't get to participate all that much in the discussion during the recap episode. This was so much better. Secondly, what a ride. Life really is stranger than fiction. That was a prestige level twist at the end. Nothing could've prepared me for that.
This is one of the best EFAPs I've listened to in a long while. I knew nothing about NeverKnowsBest, outside Starfield being terrible and rudimentary things but this stream was an eye-opener at why the company now is doing so poorly. Keep it Simple, I have never seen a principle explained so badly. But for me 10:27:42 was hysterical. I was about to sleep when I heard that and I busted out laughing non-stop for five-ten mins. And it explains so much about the video. Thank you,Longman and everyone for making my Saturday so entertaining.
I just wanted to point out that I stopped watching this EFAP halfway through to first watch Patrician's 8 hour Starfield video and I want to shout said video out. It's really dense in Information and quiet calmly presented, makes for excellent second monitor content, and I don't mean that in any way derogatory. I just really want to recommend it!
Sitting through this one was definitely a treat. This man is legitimately unhinged and does not understand the concept of a filter. He just blurts out every idea he has with his feeble voice.
11:23:55 I like how NeverKnowsBest clearly thinks that, American Emil Pagliarulo will sue American PatricianTV under British defamation laws, or lacks the understanding that American defamation law is totally different from British law.
@awhellnah__ so... my mom recently died of cancer after battling it for 4 years (a 2nd time). The situation isn't near as bleak as you paint it... and I am still in grief... don't take the black pill bro.
The funniest thing about NKB is how he is literally 100% the GDELB man, with his fragile british video essayist voice, overly long and meandering intro, somehow being capable of saying absolutely nothing for two hours straight and his exact manneurisms (long pauses, slow and quiet talking)... DESPITE the fact that GDELB was never based on him at all. The parody that mauler created, based on a whole bunch of shitty youtubers, has manifested into real world and started its own youtube channel, and now it's going against the man who made him in the first place. It's like an evil artificial intelligence plotline.
@@88-V-..-A-..-N-88 I don't like long periods of silence, a lot of bad memories start cropping up. So when I'm cooking/doing chores/walking/etc it's nice to listen to something entertaining and pleasant on topics i am interested in :D
I was that guy who built "shacks" for multiple tens of hours before remembering i'm not playing modded Minecraft and tried to play the story...to which i got 3 missions in and decided to just keep building. Had every single settlement maxxed out on the build limit and happiness before I went back to doing missions. *When the story is absolute dogshit, players will play what and how they want.*
Even if the story IS good, they'll do this anyway because there are genuinely a group of...interesting...gamers that reject engaging with all videogame stories on principle. EFAP has encountered one such person before and it was as hilarious and painful half drunk conversation as you'd expect.
Yeap my guilty pleasure is returning for settlement building with the settlement sim mod. I can say what i want about fo4 and hating it's story but i'd be lying if i didn't get my moneys worth in shack building lol.
At least there's a point to building shacks in Fallout 4. Purified water makes a lot of caps and caps are valuable since the best armor set in the game costs 45,000 caps with a CHA of 15 and all the barter magazines found and the Recon Marine armor has no level cap, so you can equip it at level one if you have the money and the personal skill to reach the vendor.
@@MundaneThingsBackwardsas a gameplay purist myself, I apologize on that guy's behalf. There's nothing more annoying than someone who plays an RPG and then complains there's too much story (or someone who plays a gameplay focused game and complains there's not enough story)
@@JCdental Mauler used to collect the funniest turns of phrase and editing idiotics from bad video essayists and make a parody video for April 1st, called "Game Developers Essentials Lessons Book" - GDELB
It is genuinely funny how they went from being fair to just mocking him relentlessly for every idiotic thing he did, the him pulling the dictionary to explain truth was fucking priceless
Because he's not fair either. He's a cherry-picking, slandering, self-righteous little weasel who was just upset that his favorite studio is being dragged through the mud and red in the face over being laughed at for his embarrassing analogy in his love letter to a fantasy setting, when he was expecting personal validation. He doesn't deserve mercy. He probably never will.
'I would describe this as just, you know...' That one line sums up both NeverKnowBest and Emil's approach to planning and writting and speaking; no planning, no effort, just.... you know.... words, pauses and... no point
Yeah, as someone who’s been watching since the TLJ rage video and before they knew it was called Efap, this is the greatest Efap of all time. This is a fucking masterpiece lol.
I know now why Mauler stopped his 'GDELB' series. Somehow, someway, the character he created gained sentience and was birthed into physical form. Like Frankenstein and Icarus before him, he would now come to regret the creation he made, and become humbled by his own hubris.
I don't see why Emil has to do something horribly wrong to be fired. Like, you could be the nicest, most reliable, hard working person, but if you can't perform the work, you should be fired. Emil can't write, at all. He has no respect for writing. He has no respect for people who want to read. He doesn't care about the worlds he works on. Unless he has some other skill I'm not aware of, like he's an amazing art designer or some other job he could be assigned to where he won't screw things up, he should be fired. It's not a moral failing to be let go from a job you are not any good at, so no one should look at him being fired like it's an attack on a some nice man who just made mistakes.
NKB's narration style always bugs me. It's like he's putting on the air of being "the only calm, rational adult in the room." But then he goes and says some of the most ridiculous shit I've ever heard.
New Vegas didn't make you want to rip the pages out so you could make paper airplanes, but they perforated the pages for you anyway, and no matter how many pages you tore out the story still worked.
That’s one of the great many things about new Vegas, whenever these morons at Bethesda claim something, like why they can’t do a certain thing, or they didn’t have enough time etc., new Vegas is always there to prove them wrong and make them look like fools.
I'm bad at ranking, but this episode is definitely straight to my EFAP Top 5. My fave longmen from across the tubes, dissecting the mad ravings and floomp arguments of a tismy narcissistic video essayist person of circus cuck. It's like GDELB never went away, praise the Don!
Regarding the whole Design document drama: What is concerning to me as a programmer is how vague Emil is regarding his use of a design document. I absolutely guarantee you that the engineers at bethesda have extensive centralised documentation about every piece of code they write. Meanwhile the designers own documentation becomes "completely outdated" during the project? I know how hard it is to maintain a coherent design vision during development, but it is a necessary evil to keep everyone of your designers on board with your project. If your design document is at any point outdated, you have failed at managing your project.
Okay, but here's the thing: Starfield has a very coherent design philosophy. Too much, even, as the dogged adherence to the hard-sci-fi NASA-punk aesthetic and the "realistic" environments outside the thematic hubs (read: industrial brutalism and barren planets. because those are the only things that makes sense in our not-too-distant-future) are a consistent yoke that's behind all the complaints about the game being "boring". That kind of thing doesn't happen on accident, so I don't believe for a second there wasn't a bunch of internal design documents at Bethesda. Maybe not one big text file on a common server, but there sure as hell had to be something, because I sincerely doubt it was just one guy running around all the departments and whipping them down in person every time they did something that was against his vision of the game that morning.
@@Horvath_Gabor aesthetic is a part of the design philosophy, but definitely not the major one. I am more so talking about gameplay mechanics and quest/npc/worldbuilding intersections. It is very easy to get everyone to agree and follow a certain aesthetic, you simply follow concept art which is produced during the design phase. You dont need huge documentation for that. However, it is very difficult to get everyone to agree to certain world-building- and story-aspects, while also incorporating gameplay choices into your design decision. I will also disagree that the planets are barren, and i think this highlights my point pretty well. Almost every planet you land on has many many existing human-built structures, which goes completely against the theme of space exploration. You are less exploring space, and more so dungeon diving into ruins/outputs like in TES or Fallout. It is a weird disjoint between gameplay mechanics (barren planets would be boring, you are right about that one), and story/themes. They want you to live the space explorer fantasy, while also recognizing that barren worlds would not appeal to a wide market.
@@danielff3844 But the thing is that those core aesthetic/setting decisions affect literally every other element in the game by posing restrictions on them. If the core design principle is "this game is set in the foreseeable hard-sci-fi future, with only humans, and in realistic space-industrialist environments", it trickles down to the rest of the game, Factions: You can only have humans, who have human concerns and goals, so you can't have memorable stories like a bunch of scientist brains in robot bodies kept in bay by another scientist in a robot body playing the role of an evil overlord to keep them in bay, fearing how much damage they could do if left loose, because it's not "realistic". It's telling that probably the most memorable quest of Starfield was the Vanguard one about an insane conspiracy involving mind-controlling alien monsters. Environments: Space-habitats and outposts follow the same templates, just like how modern factories and industrial plants are alike, which affects the gameplay itself by limiting environmental variety. This is not only "boring", but it also makes players less incentivized to explore them, while varied backdrops would also make the same combat mechanics and fight feel less samey, effecting the core explore-combat-loot loop of the game. Cool-factor and equipment: Spaceship interiors and equipment all has to follow the same minimalist and NASA-punk aesthetics, so they end up looking clunky and not very "cool" (as opposed to the fantasy gear of TES, or the varied retro-futuristic items of Fallout), which also applies to all the equipment and loot in the game. This once again affects players' motivations to get involved in the core loop, because if you aren't going to find a kooky weapon or a nice looking piece of armor after clearing a whole base, just more generic guns and space-suits with higher numbers, then what's the point? Enemy variety: Because humans are the only intelligent enemies, you'll only have them to fight, with the occasional robots here and there, and they all look the same, because they are wearing the same type or "realistic" space suits, and using the same weapons as the player. In other words, there's too little variety on that front, and the different human factions having little identity in combat (e.g. how some Fallout factions are more likely to use guns, others are more likely to use melee, while yet others would use explosives). Exploration: Real space is huge, with tons of barren and uninhabited planets, so to be realistic, the game's space has to be huge and mostly barren as well. Yet, because this is a Bethesda game, the players have to be able to explore them as well, but because there are no intelligent aliens with their own architecture, or weird and wacky "unrealistic" environment, it results in the same industrialist outposts, refineries, and caves being everywhere, because there's nothing else to choose from while maintaining the "realism". People online have been making a huge clamor about the loading screens, and the lighting engine, and non-important NPCs looking floompy at times, but I rarely ever see these things addressed, outside of maybe saying that the game was "boring" or it "didn't click with them for some reason". I think these are the game's real issues, and some of these are definitely going to be fixed by the modding community in time (including the god-awful progression mechanics), but it just annoys me that people seem to be so bogged down in the online buzzwords they seem to skim over this core design decision that cascades down to every element of the game.
@@Horvath_Gabor i think starfield aesthetics is dissapointing with how vast potential space exploration tech design is. i wonder if bethesda actually do research about Nasa and what they discover in space
@@Horvath_Gabor But in reality, that whole "realism" mindset result is due to a lack of imagination and world experience. I would tell someone who told me that "all industrial sites look the same" that they need to travel more. People get up to some weird shit when they give creative freedom to architects and engineers. Considering the complaints I am hearing from people in the modding community, I think this was an excuse because of problems with the game engine. They were forced to limit the scope of everything and didn't see a way to code themselves out of it.
NKB mentioning the Doom Bible is kind of hilarious because he tries to use it as a point about how it's an antiquated practice from the 90s, only pointing to its age, when he could instead have pointed out how the document was written by Tom Hall, who was fired early on in development, and the rest of Id Software ended up not really using the stuff in the document at all. It's like, he could have had an argument here about a design document not being necessary to make a great game, but he completely fucks it up because he didn't even bother researching.
I think the fact he mentioned the 80's as well as the 90's is just one of those small things that shows he probably doesn't have any idea about what he's talking about.
Thank you. I'm surprised nobody efapping in this episode caught that. The Doom Bible is used by people who _actually fucking understand the history surrounding it_ as an example of a game doc being ignored so hard that it wound up being a major cause of the first of a series of significant internal fights that ultimately broke up the original id Software dream team.
Emil's job is to write stories for games. He is terrible at writing. Emil should be fired from that job. If there is a job at Bethesda he is actually competent at, he can have that job instead, but from this job he should be fired. I'm actually not certain he knows what "fired" means. No, he SHOULD be fired, he's not good at his job, that is the BEST reason to fire someone from a job.
And the most important aspect of why he should be fired, he REFUSES to accept ANY criticism and will NOT improve his writing. That is unacceptable. I don't care how "positive" he is, it's not healthy to pretend to be infinitely positive and to never acknowledge anything that might slightly upset you.
had to come back to this after seeing it live just to say it's pretty fucked up how NKB can just weaponize emil's dead family member with the sad fucking violin music in the background and in all the reddit threads covering his video, not one person felt like calling this shit out.
I think this might be the case of it didn't even registering, even if people actually fully watched NKB's video fully. I can actually understand that. I bet most people don't watch video essays actively, so some stuff can fall through the cracks. As a real example when the cuck thing came up i had this reaction: 1. Wait this insult seems out of place. 2. Holly hell, he did in fact make himself into a cuck in this metaphor. 3. Wait, what video is this from? I watch NKB and don't remember this. 4. Man, i actually watched the video there that segment is from. I didn't pay attention to that analogy at all and might've even think it was heartfelt, cause of the music. Now i can't unhear it, but same could've happened to people with sad thing about Emil. They heard the music and the speech, but people might not even realize what it actually was and how weird that segment is without actively trying to think about it.
What’s crazy was how specific it was. If there was an overall sad backing music for the section on Emil as a person, it would still be manipulative, but not nearly as scummy. But no. The regular music plays, dies down, the violin fades in as he talks about his sister, then it immediately cuts out as he continues talking. Absolutely shameful.
I watched a good portion of this live. I then watched it through once, and now I'm going through one more time, and there's still layers to this whole thing. Truly, an EFAP for the ages.
I dont like how NKB genuinely misrepresented PatricianTV. Its so funny seeing him say Patrician misrepresented Emil... then the clip of Emil that patrician misrepresented is literally the same thing. The jazz music bit is just so, so bad. This isn't meant as an insult but are we certain NKB isnt autistic? Theres a really obvious lack of understanding of basic social cues.
That was my first take, but then he continued talking and made it abundantly clear that he was just intentionally taking anything and everything that Pat said (at least, what NeverCuckedBest _bothered_ to listen to) in the worst possible faith in a deliberate effort to misrepresent both the intended meaning and the _actual words_ that Pat said.
"People worked hard on it" is such a stupid argument. Yeah they worked hard on a product they intend to sell me, I sure as fuck hope they did. Look at Starfield, Bethesda worked really hard on it! Really? And this was the BEST they could do?
What's with bad youtubers insulting themselves in their names ?? NeverKnowsBest, Pillar of Garbage, at this point just call your channel "I'm a mor0n" and call it a day.
Wow, when I got to his claim that *any* document with elements of design is a design document, I just said "noooo, that's not it at all, this is a lie" out loud. What a disingenuous man.
@@MaxiusTheGod That is how Emil's name is pronounced. It's not "ih-meal". Patrician and Creetosis say it right, and Rags, Mauler, and Fringy usually say it wrong. Not a big deal, most people pronounce it wrong because that's how most people whose name is like that pronounce it.
@@333animemasterYour regional dialect doesn't have anything to do with it. He pronounces it "ih-mul", so anything else when pronouncing his name, specifically when we're talking about him, is incorrect.
If something used to be great, and now it sucks, and you can identify the guy who's responsibility it is, it's fine to want him to not have that responsibility anymore.
Love the video Just wanted to say I love Skyrim but I get why alot of people don't The game does have a theme but it's kinda wild that the guy didn't just seem to know it or couldn't get the words out The theme of Skyrim is pretty much about Power and the responsible use of power and the consequences of misuse. Pretty much every major faction/side quest as well as the main quest revolve around the misuse of power Alduin decides to misuse his power and shirks his responsibility as the world eater to enslave humanity The head of he Thieve's Guild misuses his power of the skeleton key to only add to his own personal wealth rather than only for the responsibilities of the Nightingales The head of the dark brotherhood tries to ignore the responsibilities of the night mother and instead causes the brotherhood to stagnate We learn about how the dwarves seemed to have found some great power and as a result disappeared. Ulfric Stormcloak misused the Voice powers to kill an opponent over a political war when his power wasn't meant to be involved in such things The Winterhold was destroyed due to the misuse of magic and as a result magic users are looked at with disdain Even the Emperor gets assassinated as a result of not using his power responsibly in the eyes of Skyrim's people when he rolled over for the Thalmor It's arguably a pretty simple theme but it is there
Uh, except you got alot of that wrong. Alduin is never really explained; was he really supposed to destroy the world back then, when it was new? That's weird. And since the plot is to PREVENT that, it doesn't make sense to say that he was WRONG not to kill eveyone. Thieve's guild, yeah, totally correct on that one. Dark Brotherhood, like, okay, so the proper use of power is murdering because a corpse tells you to? That's rather contradictory. And Astrid just didn't believe in the stories and feared for the survival of her family, as messed up as they were--she wasn't abusive with her power. The dwarves story is from Morrowind, it's just referenced in Skyrim as part of history. Ulfric Stormcloak had a fair duel with the high king and won, and the idea that the power wasn't meant to be used for such things is just the belief of the greybeards, the very same people you IGNORE for the plot, aka, they were WRONG. And there is no explanation as to what happened in Winterhold; the mages are BLAMED, but every source inside the college says they did nothing, and speculate it was a result of the neighboring volcano going off. As for the emperor, either decision he made would be seen as not using his power reponsibly by a ton of people. No offense, but I think you're reaching to justify a game full of fun but meaningless stories.
In regards to NKB's video being an intentional trap, it's possible that pat is projecting his own competence/knowledge onto someone who isn't actually competent themselves. It's actually pretty common for smart people to overestimate the intelligence of others.
As someone who has watched a few of his other videos, he definitely was just tard raging when he made this and gathering evidence to support a conclusion rather than actually researching the topic himself. The guy is overly sensitive about negativity towards games, overly critical of critique, has a chip on his shoulder over the internet being prone to hyperbole, and really likes Starfield and Bethesda despite insistence to the contrary. His Bad Games/Gollum video is like a prequel to this one, in it he takes a lot of drive-by potshots at Starfield criticism in very disingenuous ways, despite it being mostly unrelated to the topic.
@@MistaHoward He called FFXIV players locusts in his FFXIV review just because players consume content on release, despite locust leaving devastation in their wake and FFXIV players do not. I get the distinct impression he has a great distain for games and gamers and youtubers.
@@Edax_Royeaux He loves games, he has basically no standards for them, the guy thinks fucking FF13 and FF2 are great games. He absolutely does hate the community surrounding them and sees himself as above them all though, despite the fact that he unironically praises absolute bottom of the barrel garbage like Genshin Impact. He mistakenly believes that him having basically no standards and being easily pleased by a pretty overworld with absolutely zero substance makes him "positive" and not "a huge fucking tool". There also seems to be a huge disconnect between himself and reality for the average gamer; I think the fact that he can basically get a game "free" by making a video on it drastically colors his perception - he acts like poeple shouldn't have any reason to be angry over Starfield being bad to any degree at all, despite the fact that many of said people were literally swindled out of $100.
@@Grishnag85 I think he was making the point about all MMORPG players, devouring content and leaving the game a wasteland afterwards. Still I don't recall Endwalker being a wasteland after most people played the campaign. Old Sharlayan was less crowded but that was about it.
I had no idea how off the rails this shit went. I got NKBs video recommended without any prior knowledge, watched through the part with the Reddit post, roughly agreed that the speech wasn’t very important and that it’s weird everyone thinks the writing at Bethesda would improve if they fired one guy, and moved on without watching the rest of the video. I assumed the rest was just him dragging out the point that Bethesda has a lot more problems than just one writer and he would have a section about not harassing people. I didn’t realize I was but moments away from watching him descend into schizo posting
I'm in thr same boat, except I tuned out of that NKB vid riiiiight around the time he started casting aspersions at Az, ItsAGundam, and certain other people in this sphere. I felt done. Holy GOD, what I missed. What a ride.
This was one of the best streams in so long! I love that Pat got to shine since he didnt have much to say the last time he was on. He fits right in with the other longmen!
"Write what you know" is a pretty terrible idea given these writers mostly go from school to college/university and then go into the job market. They've done nothing so far with their life so their writing will be bad.
It needs to go hand-in-hand with "Know/Learn as much as possible", or else all you'll write is stuff that hits too close to home (and that's the best case scenario).
Better would be "know what you write." If you don't have experience with an evil assassin guild, read a book about one that actually existed. If you know nothing about a nuclear apocalypse, do research on that. If you have never been to where your story is set, take a trip there, talk to people who live there, or read a book about it. "Write what you know" has a habit of causing people to write autobiographies instead of novels.
As an amateurish writer, I approach "write what you know" as "use your irl knowledge as a pillar" . Like in my short stories there are long and detailed fights because I started doing Karate at age 6 and even did some tournaments. A shoot out is just "people shoot guns at eachother" a close combat is " X grabs Y arm and punches Y the elbow, then swiftly kicks his foot and throws him on the ground" I've read some cringe where people were clearly talking out of their asses, also 99% of movies/series about strong whamen are incredibly cringe since those slim teen girls/ lazy karens use heavyweight styles because production couldn't be bothered to call a female athlete.
What I can't wrap my head around is why would anybody feel the impulse to defend anything about modern Bethesda writing? It's just bad, self evidently. Let them take their knocks or it'll never be forced to get any better.
6:09:10 That is such a good point. NKB didn't really defend Emil's work nor did he make the video for vindicating the guy. NKB just seems to have a beef with people who put up any criticism of Bethseda, and Patrician who called him a cuck and Emil was his excuse to tie his love of BGS games with hatred of his own/their critics.
NKB keeps changing his point of view on everything, and he wants to claim that Patrician is plagiarizing him? Patrician can actually argue a point without flip-flopping halfway through. It's ridiculous
Guess who NKB reminds me of? Hbomberguy. the whole Internet Historian section came across like "finally I can snipe that guy that said stupid shit and make fun about LBGQT". The difference is Hbomberguy didn't need to make stuff up. The motivation behind both action looks rather personal to me
Although for the plagiarism hbomb did have actual evidence, though he did fumble a handful of examples for it, he regularly made illogical assumptions and insinuations to poison the well to get his audience to be even more against IH than they otherwise would be
Hbomberguy absolutely made stuff up to portray Internet Historian as some kind of alt right neo Nazi! The only true thing he said was about the plagiarism.
@@Amarenamann of course, vincent was asking to be responsed by other, he obsessed to get attention. the response video sure was something which both creetosis cohost showed up in his scripted video to point out missused word that vincent keep using to sound smart than it actually was. which i believe the video has been taken down for some reason
@@crelgen1588 He hates Cree because of his 8 hour analysis of Fallout 3. He made a really bad defense video for F3 that Cree and his co-hosts responded to in which he made a lot of brain dead arguments complete with broken English and he's been a meme in Crees fanbase ever since.
Virgin Bethesda: "It's so sad that players IGNORE our story to go do GAMEPLAY and hit things! Why can't people just play our open-world RPG the way we designed it to be played? That's the curse of making videogames; it's not like it's a movie where you can just set the pacing however you want with no interference from the audience." The Chad SantaMonica: "It's awesome that players have an active part in telling the story. We took the liberty of recording 3 entirely different dialogue trees for each side quest so that no matter what order you play them in at what part of the game, it will always make sense and tie into what's happening on the main quest timeline. We encourage players to go and try different orders for the story with each replay, and see how the tone of the mission totally changes when it's with Freya rather than Artreus. It's really a unique blessing that we can do this in a videogame, other formats don't have this opportunity."
Nah, bethesda and emil specifically may as well have said "why bother writing an award winning story that will be remembered and beloved for decades to come cuz a few children wont bother with the story"
10:27:42 - This is what you're looking for... but make sure to check out the whole stream too ;-)
I can't wait for this to be a highlight. One of the top efap moments for sure. Patrician was a great guest.
You do the lords work, Longman.
This will be on EFAP highlights channel within the week.
Fucking hilarious.
afraid I can't find the time for this one
afraid I can't find the time for this one
NKB has characterized Patrician as being a propagandist, a cult leader and a snake oil sales man, leading me do conclude that Pat is both Dutch Van Der Linde AND Nigel West-Dickens.
So he has "a plan"™ and a minigun?
Count me in
This is simultaneously one of the funniest and one of the most painful episodes I've ever seen, and I've seen them all.
This funny in the way a Dr. Phil episode is funny
NKB truly is the powerhouse of tisms.
@@8ligh7How dare you sully the good name of tism.
At least it wasn't the Star Wars prequel "debate" video, that one was pure pain to revisit lol.
@@moonraven6145Haven't watched that (yet?). If possible, can you give some context to what you said? Thanks.
Starfield did the one thing I thought wasn't possible. It woke Bethesda fans up to the fact that they're not excited for a new game, they're excited for a new sandbox with better physics and graphics so they can make more realistic sex mods.
"Damn, that was so half-baked even Bethesda fans said something. *That's bad."*
Wasn't Starfield the game where modders went, its so fucking dull and boring that we give up making mods for it.
Bethesda fans are split in three different ways and modding isn't what's keeping them split. Sounds like that's just what you wanted.
@@8ligh7 a bunch of them did. I remember the skyrim coop modder saying he started working on the mod but the game is so boring and miserable he just noped out. This time modders will not "save" the game. They never did previously tbh, they just made it a bit less dogshit.
@@8ligh7 The bigger problem is that the newer engine supposedly fucks with modding. Any two mods even if they modify two totally unrelated aspects of the game may require a patch.
Finally. A normal length of Efap.
It’s like a cold glass of water on a hot summer day
@@vivechjorviani5440 an extremely tall and hilariously shaped glass
@@wwyd4akb curly little silly straw coming out the top
Reminds me of a joke...A man goes to a doctor.
“Doctor, I’m depressed,” the man says, "the youtubers are harsh, unforgiving, cruel".
The doctor lights up. The treatment, after all, is simple. “The great game designer Emil Pagliarulo has released his new game,” the doctor says, “Go play it! That should sort you out.”
The man bursts into tears. “But doctor,” he says, “I am Emil Pagliarulo.”
Good joke, everybody laugh.
Drum snare. Curtains close.
if i was emil pagliarulo, i would burst into tears too
It's insane just how much NKB behaves as if he's vicariously Emil, specifically referring to the part where he wished Emil would file a defamation suit against Patrician, and the near crying at the "over a video game. Good job guys" part.
And everyone clapped
A man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says doctors are harsh and cruel. "Go see Dr. Doctor, that should cure you". Man bursts into tears. "But Doctor... I am Doctor."
efap was like my first relationship with podcasts, i thought it was just for me and we were perfect, back in the jared days. We, grew apart, and now i’ve been hearing you’ve been seeing new people, i’ve moved on too, but i still, miss you.
My new gal STAG is quite nice but I always look back when you were into wolf and think about what could have been if things went differently, but I guess that's life. Sometime it is just not meant to be. I'm happy for you things worked out for you.
Although I think STAG left me for you. Not sure why or what I did wrong. I only know thinking about you too always makes me really really ., excited
@@Superschokokeksthank you friend
Timestamps
0:21 Welcome!
1:20 Backstory
18:03 Fringy Is Here!
20:18 The Video Starts
22:50 Opinions & Reviews
27:42 Joseph Anderson
30:56 Experts & Opening
38:00 Drop-shadows & Misrepresentation
42:08 Is This A Trap?
51:09 The Talk
58:15 Do You Know Me?
1:02:45 Emil (1)
1:20:22 Internet Faliure Break
1:21:57 Emil (2)
1:23:04 The Biden Moment
1:24:33 Emil (3)
1:32:28 Subway
1:34:55 Revenge Of The Siths
1:36:35 Run Sam Run
1:38:05 Fallout
1:40:27 Spokespersons & Writers
1:45:18 Emil(4)
1:50:32 Peck vs Touch
1:59:20 The Speech
2:55:28 Intros
2:58:21 After The Speech
3:03:19 Harassment
3:08:38 Emil’s Tweet
3:15:49 Public Speaking & The Response
3:41:27 The End Of The Introduction
3:44:59 A Reasonable Reddit Post
3:50:50 The Trial Of Creetosis
5:45:05 Erin Moriarty
5:49:19 Shame On You, Creetosis!
6:14:30 Zaric Zhakaron
6:27:18 Patrician TV (1)
6:30:37 Space Hopper & Todd Howard
6:51:46 Patrician TV (2)
7:01:50 Pizzatime
7:02:53 Patrician TV (3)
7:12:52The GDD
7:18:35 Patrician TV (4)
7:51:38 ART
7:54:05 Patrician TV (5)
10:15:50 Plagiarism
10:27:42 This is what you're looking for
10:40:20 The Situation
10:46:10 Twitter Troubles
11:09:50 Asmongold TV
11:14:22 Emil Is A Normal Person
11:22:55 Closing?
11:23:50 Defamation
11:24:55 Creetosis
11:27:24 Patrician TV
11:28:50 Last Words
Sorry but I don't think this is useful and may be ruining the overall watch time
@@coolvibesradio3267 Thanks for the comment! My intention with the timestamps was to enhance navigation and make it easier for viewers to jump to specific sections. However, I can definitely understand how they might not be everyone's cup of tea. Could you maybe elaborate on what specifically makes them feel disruptive? That might help me improve, adjust them, or reconsider their future publication.
Which of these is the one where they show the patrician meme sticker
talking about how he's off to plow nevers wife?
@@MrNinjaBurgerIt's after the "this is what you're looking for" part
@JulianDoe I really appreciate the time stamps,
I think the other guy is basically saying that a lot of people will just click the time stamps and look for what's funniest or entertaining to watch thus losing some context and having massive gaps in watch time.
Creetosis ...
- Walks into an EFAP for the first time
- Said EFAP becomes an instant classic
- Refuses to elaborate about his podcast
- Leaves
The inner machinations of the purple goat's mind are an enigma...
@@tentacledood5784*_malk carton falls over spilling on table_*
EFAP need more Creetardosis in the future
@@kadalsaurus6232 In Creetosis's community, we say Creetardation
Remember, he isn’t a furry
I disagree. When plastic surgery makes people ugly people SHOULD speak up and shame it. This will prevent more lives from being ruined.
But they spent all that moneyyyy
They have the right to feel gooood about it
😶
@@SaiDeLaRai Simultaneously, they should be encouraged to ask for a refund if it turns out poorly.
Correct, samething applies to gender transition
This reveal behind NeverKnowsBest's motivations demands a patented Rich Evans style "OHHHHHMYYYYYYGAAAAAAWWWD"
"Oh! Okay. . . . . . . . . . .
Wait WHAT THE FU--"
RLM mentioned!
The bit Mooler timestamped is gold but I just want to shoutout the bit at approx 10:35:25 where Patrician says it might be based on something that happened to NKB and Mauler is just '...OK'.
The pain in his voice 😂
I can't believe Pat was so upset about his underwhelming first episode of EFAP that he mind controlled NeverKnowsBest into making this video so he'd have ample content to cover
Just how much more unhinged can he get?
Typical cult leader behavior I’m afraid…
@josh11735 I too summon the daemon lord to control my enemies!
@@josh11735the cast is too afraid to speak up against him sadly
And mind you NKB never wanted to make this video, truly abhorrent
@@jubbalubby Pat intellectually raped his video into existence.
First of all, thank you for bringing Pat back. He didn't get to participate all that much in the discussion during the recap episode. This was so much better.
Secondly, what a ride. Life really is stranger than fiction. That was a prestige level twist at the end. Nothing could've prepared me for that.
Like a moth to a flame, I'm back to rewatch this. It is my only joy in life.
This was my first EFAP. Needless to say, I will be here for the rest of them.
Ye. Efap is good rat
Do you happen to milk rhinos ?
@@therealfakecaptain7978single digit efap lore right there
Do you believe spiders can see the future?
How long are you…?
i like the contrast between creetosis goofy smiling avatar and NKB constantly showing it off like a wanted poster
"Skyrim is the girlfriend you deserve." -Raggo Beeingo
NO! I will never take an arrow to the knee! 🦵👀
@@Amarenamannnonmodded skyrim is what you deserve would be the real insult.
@Amarenamann snd it is mediocre. I enjoyed it till the third playthrough but then it grew stale.
The nonchalant cadence of Cree putting a bow on that whole bit with "you're a cuck" is the funniest thing I've heard in a while. Meme magic.
a sloppy yet adequate lover
This is one of the best EFAPs I've listened to in a long while. I knew nothing about NeverKnowsBest, outside Starfield being terrible and rudimentary things but this stream was an eye-opener at why the company now is doing so poorly. Keep it Simple, I have never seen a principle explained so badly. But for me 10:27:42 was hysterical. I was about to sleep when I heard that and I busted out laughing non-stop for five-ten mins. And it explains so much about the video. Thank you,Longman and everyone for making my Saturday so entertaining.
Patrician is really funny.
I remember when Neverknowsbest called FFXIV players "locust" when Endwalker just released.
I just wanted to point out that I stopped watching this EFAP halfway through to first watch Patrician's 8 hour Starfield video and I want to shout said video out. It's really dense in Information and quiet calmly presented, makes for excellent second monitor content, and I don't mean that in any way derogatory. I just really want to recommend it!
Cree's Emil video is great too.
ADHD is a hell of a thing, eh?
His TES series in general is amazing, some of the best content on gaming i've seen in general
I'll check it out after I watch this 👍🏻
Thanks for the recommendation! I shall put it on my list
Someone describing a game as their gf is my one joy in life.
Hey, if someone can marry a copy of Love Plus, I don't see how the Kuckmanizer is breaking new ground in cringe.
Don't forget the part about Microsoft being the bull.
You understand what it is to dream
@@charlesruteal9062At least the guy that married a videogame isn't a GDELB tier video essayist.
I read this comment not knowing wtf you meant. And now that I do… holy shit lol
Happy to see Cree get onto this discount version of the 1000% original STAG podcast.
It's been an honour for mauler raggggggggsssss and fringy
I love stag so this was awesome for me
That was the least threatening "I will ban you" I've ever heard
My two favorite longmen bringing me and fellow watchers this golden episode~
Sitting through this one was definitely a treat. This man is legitimately unhinged and does not understand the concept of a filter. He just blurts out every idea he has with his feeble voice.
Instant classic EFAP. A good old fashioned, "we watch the vid, we critique" love it.
11:23:55 I like how NeverKnowsBest clearly thinks that, American Emil Pagliarulo will sue American PatricianTV under British defamation laws, or lacks the understanding that American defamation law is totally different from British law.
I just looked up British defamation laws due to this comment and suffice it to say I've never been more happy to be an American.
@@lukew6725 inalienable rights are a hell of a drug
@awhellnah__hey buddy, that’s not actually how medical debt works
@awhellnah__ close, getting arrested for quoting songs and making jokes is actually the peak of human condition
@awhellnah__ so... my mom recently died of cancer after battling it for 4 years (a 2nd time). The situation isn't near as bleak as you paint it... and I am still in grief... don't take the black pill bro.
I love that Beowyn is still out there producing fantastic efap art. They've been around for so long!
The funniest thing about NKB is how he is literally 100% the GDELB man, with his fragile british video essayist voice, overly long and meandering intro, somehow being capable of saying absolutely nothing for two hours straight and his exact manneurisms (long pauses, slow and quiet talking)...
DESPITE the fact that GDELB was never based on him at all. The parody that mauler created, based on a whole bunch of shitty youtubers, has manifested into real world and started its own youtube channel, and now it's going against the man who made him in the first place. It's like an evil artificial intelligence plotline.
MauLer accidentally created a tulpa.
Don't forget "slimey and passive aggressive."
To quote a certain historian: "The AI is more A than I"
He is decent white noise for me. Long enough so I don't need to change the video and quiet enough he's not disruptive to my thought processes.
NKB: I am ALL of the video essayists!
NKB: Stop giving me your hardest battles
Emil: But you’re my best soldier
You’re my worst essayist
More accurately:
NKB: Stop giving me your hardest battles
Emil: Can you leave me alone? I'm not that important.
@@abhainnxv After seeing the end of the video, Emil should get a restraining order against this guy. He's clearly obsessed with him.
“You’re my biggest cuck”
@@Wheningoubt wouldnt be surprised if he stalks emil
"Grog not want to make this poisonous berry review, but Grog feel Grog have to." kek
Underrated part
"[sighs] Grog no want to make this cave painting..."
@@DaMaster012 But grog see many cave painting depicting wrong thing
LEAVE THE BILLION DOLLAR COMPANY ALONE OR ELSE
It's WORSE THAN THAT
It's "Hey leave the Billionaire boyfriend (Microsoft) of my ex (Bethesda/Elder Scrolls) alone!"
This may be the greatest EFAP so far. If Cuck Energy could be harnessed, the NKB video could power the world.
It is actually the primary chemical compound found in soy.
Btw, I'm a game designer, I used confluence for my doc.
We literally call it "the game doc" when we don't refer to it as "the confluence".
Oh man these two were such a good addition to the panel, this has been an absolute joy to listen to
Ahhh, it’s been a while since we had an 11+ hour EFAP. :)
Praise the cosmic chicken for this blessing!!
How do you listen to this for 12hrs ? Like seriously?
@@88-V-..-A-..-N-88 I do physical work, 8 hour shifts, 5 days a week. Gotta put SOMETHING in my earbuds. :)
@@88-V-..-A-..-N-88 I don't like long periods of silence, a lot of bad memories start cropping up. So when I'm cooking/doing chores/walking/etc it's nice to listen to something entertaining and pleasant on topics i am interested in :D
@@88-V-..-A-..-N-88As others have said. Also, you don't need to listen/watch these videos in just one session.
I was that guy who built "shacks" for multiple tens of hours before remembering i'm not playing modded Minecraft and tried to play the story...to which i got 3 missions in and decided to just keep building. Had every single settlement maxxed out on the build limit and happiness before I went back to doing missions.
*When the story is absolute dogshit, players will play what and how they want.*
Even if the story IS good, they'll do this anyway because there are genuinely a group of...interesting...gamers that reject engaging with all videogame stories on principle. EFAP has encountered one such person before and it was as hilarious and painful half drunk conversation as you'd expect.
@@MundaneThingsBackwards "I'VE BEEN BUILDING SHACKS FOR 30 YEARS"
Yeap my guilty pleasure is returning for settlement building with the settlement sim mod. I can say what i want about fo4 and hating it's story but i'd be lying if i didn't get my moneys worth in shack building lol.
At least there's a point to building shacks in Fallout 4. Purified water makes a lot of caps and caps are valuable since the best armor set in the game costs 45,000 caps with a CHA of 15 and all the barter magazines found and the Recon Marine armor has no level cap, so you can equip it at level one if you have the money and the personal skill to reach the vendor.
@@MundaneThingsBackwardsas a gameplay purist myself, I apologize on that guy's behalf. There's nothing more annoying than someone who plays an RPG and then complains there's too much story (or someone who plays a gameplay focused game and complains there's not enough story)
“The video essayist cries out in pain as it strikes you” Ragdolf Dogler
"what a load of BULLSHIT!!!" -James Ralfe
Deus Ex had a design doc of 500 pages and they revamped it twice. He's telling us Fallout 4 had a 50 page doc!!!??? That really does explain a lot.
Did I hear wrong? I thought he said they had a 50pg doc for FO3, not 4, and threw it out and never had one after that.
@@alexhayden219 Yeah, it was Fallout 3. I mistyped.
@@bradleyscottt1773 Cool. Just wanted to make sure of what level of insanity was on display by Emil. XD
To be fair, all they needed to create Fallout 3 was "Oblivion but in a post-apocalyptic desert". All their video games follow this philosophy.
Somehow, some way, Mauler manifested the GDELB man into reality.
Gdelb?
@darekrogovski something Mauler used to do which was making fun of bad video essayists, done via compiling stupid statements heard in efap.
Somehow, Mooper returned.
The Force sensed his absence and elected to incarnate him in our world
@@JCdental Mauler used to collect the funniest turns of phrase and editing idiotics from bad video essayists and make a parody video for April 1st, called "Game Developers Essentials Lessons Book" - GDELB
I watched for ten and a half hours to see the reveal of the villain's motivations. And I was not disappointed.
Legend has it, NKB once touched grass and it reported him for harassment
But was the harassment sexual? And did his hand get broken for it?
Just laughed my arse off at 5:50am… cheers lol
But he's a man, and no one cared
The grass then went to be together with a richer man
@@alex9x9thanks, I laughed out loud in the middle of my gym
"Maybe the real tragedy was the design document we didn't make along the way." - Bethesda Baggins
It is genuinely funny how they went from being fair to just mocking him relentlessly for every idiotic thing he did, the him pulling the dictionary to explain truth was fucking priceless
Because he's not fair either. He's a cherry-picking, slandering, self-righteous little weasel who was just upset that his favorite studio is being dragged through the mud and red in the face over being laughed at for his embarrassing analogy in his love letter to a fantasy setting, when he was expecting personal validation. He doesn't deserve mercy. He probably never will.
@@RorytheRomulan he ws not even defending bethesda he was defending emil. nkb is pretty anti bethesda as seen by the cotnenxt of the cuck thing.
It just shows how terrible NKB's video actually is.
His guy might be dumber than Hasan. I never thought I’d say it
4:54:46 when NKB questioned his “reading comprehension” I first heard it as “breeding comprehension” and thought he was calling him a virgin
Ngl this adds multiple levels of humour to the later part we all had a laugh at.
@@333animemaster it really does 😂😂, nothing could have prepared me for what was about to happen
I'll be stealing that.
Oh, the build up to That Moment on repeat viewings is…*Chef’s Kiss*
i was NOT expecting that twist ending haha, totally worth watching the entire stream.
'I would describe this as just, you know...'
That one line sums up both NeverKnowBest and Emil's approach to planning and writting and speaking; no planning, no effort, just.... you know.... words, pauses and... no point
A quick 11 hour EFAP retrospective
Yeah, as someone who’s been watching since the TLJ rage video and before they knew it was called Efap, this is the greatest Efap of all time. This is a fucking masterpiece lol.
Ah, another man of culture.
I'm partial to 93 and 217, but this is definitely way up there.
Nah
Efapers will claim this is still Shortman
It’s average
11 hours is average, about average. In fact, some would even say it's a bit short, a bit on the short side.
Fake fapper over here
I know now why Mauler stopped his 'GDELB' series.
Somehow, someway, the character he created gained sentience and was birthed into physical form.
Like Frankenstein and Icarus before him, he would now come to regret the creation he made, and become humbled by his own hubris.
I don't see why Emil has to do something horribly wrong to be fired. Like, you could be the nicest, most reliable, hard working person, but if you can't perform the work, you should be fired. Emil can't write, at all. He has no respect for writing. He has no respect for people who want to read. He doesn't care about the worlds he works on. Unless he has some other skill I'm not aware of, like he's an amazing art designer or some other job he could be assigned to where he won't screw things up, he should be fired. It's not a moral failing to be let go from a job you are not any good at, so no one should look at him being fired like it's an attack on a some nice man who just made mistakes.
Also, he’s just legitimately low iq lol.
Never Knows Best is projecting so hard he could be used to watch films on your bathroom wall
NKB's narration style always bugs me. It's like he's putting on the air of being "the only calm, rational adult in the room." But then he goes and says some of the most ridiculous shit I've ever heard.
After watching GDELB his content becomes a catchphrase goldmine
"Am I an insane arrogant cuck? NO. ITS EVERYONE ELSE WHO IS WRONG !"
Its good comedy
I've been trying to find a way to articulate how his speaking cadence and tone of voice really bugs me and this is a great way to put it.
Finally we can explain the last few years of media, modern writers must have misunderstood the KISS acronym to mean Keep It Stupid, Simple.
"The Elder Scrolls cucked me, but I think I liked it." - NKB
New Vegas didn't make you want to rip the pages out so you could make paper airplanes, but they perforated the pages for you anyway, and no matter how many pages you tore out the story still worked.
That’s one of the great many things about new Vegas, whenever these morons at Bethesda claim something, like why they can’t do a certain thing, or they didn’t have enough time etc., new Vegas is always there to prove them wrong and make them look like fools.
Alt title - Documentation is implied.
Audibly groaned just reading that. Have a like.
Yes that’s a wonderful potential title for the stream.
I hope PatricianTV and Creetosis become buddies based off of both being targeted by this internet equivalent of a crazy subway hobo.
He's more like the "aspring author" at McCafé who won't stop talking about Boris Johnson.
i thought they already friends since Acerthorn drama
Glad you all enjoyed the MEME. ^.-.^
you cooked so well
Not all heroes wear capes.
Bae-wen!!! I’m so flustered…I usually don’t get star struck, but here we are…
Gorgeous beuwen
Why is the mouth above the eyes but below the ears of your emoji
Congrats on getting a seat, Creetosis.
"The game is the design document"
"If the rule led you to this, of what use was the rule?"
Based reference
I'm bad at ranking, but this episode is definitely straight to my EFAP Top 5. My fave longmen from across the tubes, dissecting the mad ravings and floomp arguments of a tismy narcissistic video essayist person of circus cuck. It's like GDELB never went away, praise the Don!
Person of circus is great, really has that "hello all my ewoks" energy
I’ve been watching since before it was even called Efap and this for sure a top 5, and my personal favorite
Regarding the whole Design document drama: What is concerning to me as a programmer is how vague Emil is regarding his use of a design document. I absolutely guarantee you that the engineers at bethesda have extensive centralised documentation about every piece of code they write. Meanwhile the designers own documentation becomes "completely outdated" during the project? I know how hard it is to maintain a coherent design vision during development, but it is a necessary evil to keep everyone of your designers on board with your project. If your design document is at any point outdated, you have failed at managing your project.
Okay, but here's the thing: Starfield has a very coherent design philosophy. Too much, even, as the dogged adherence to the hard-sci-fi NASA-punk aesthetic and the "realistic" environments outside the thematic hubs (read: industrial brutalism and barren planets. because those are the only things that makes sense in our not-too-distant-future) are a consistent yoke that's behind all the complaints about the game being "boring". That kind of thing doesn't happen on accident, so I don't believe for a second there wasn't a bunch of internal design documents at Bethesda. Maybe not one big text file on a common server, but there sure as hell had to be something, because I sincerely doubt it was just one guy running around all the departments and whipping them down in person every time they did something that was against his vision of the game that morning.
@@Horvath_Gabor aesthetic is a part of the design philosophy, but definitely not the major one. I am more so talking about gameplay mechanics and quest/npc/worldbuilding intersections.
It is very easy to get everyone to agree and follow a certain aesthetic, you simply follow concept art which is produced during the design phase. You dont need huge documentation for that. However, it is very difficult to get everyone to agree to certain world-building- and story-aspects, while also incorporating gameplay choices into your design decision.
I will also disagree that the planets are barren, and i think this highlights my point pretty well. Almost every planet you land on has many many existing human-built structures, which goes completely against the theme of space exploration. You are less exploring space, and more so dungeon diving into ruins/outputs like in TES or Fallout. It is a weird disjoint between gameplay mechanics (barren planets would be boring, you are right about that one), and story/themes. They want you to live the space explorer fantasy, while also recognizing that barren worlds would not appeal to a wide market.
@@danielff3844 But the thing is that those core aesthetic/setting decisions affect literally every other element in the game by posing restrictions on them. If the core design principle is "this game is set in the foreseeable hard-sci-fi future, with only humans, and in realistic space-industrialist environments", it trickles down to the rest of the game,
Factions: You can only have humans, who have human concerns and goals, so you can't have memorable stories like a bunch of scientist brains in robot bodies kept in bay by another scientist in a robot body playing the role of an evil overlord to keep them in bay, fearing how much damage they could do if left loose, because it's not "realistic". It's telling that probably the most memorable quest of Starfield was the Vanguard one about an insane conspiracy involving mind-controlling alien monsters.
Environments: Space-habitats and outposts follow the same templates, just like how modern factories and industrial plants are alike, which affects the gameplay itself by limiting environmental variety. This is not only "boring", but it also makes players less incentivized to explore them, while varied backdrops would also make the same combat mechanics and fight feel less samey, effecting the core explore-combat-loot loop of the game.
Cool-factor and equipment: Spaceship interiors and equipment all has to follow the same minimalist and NASA-punk aesthetics, so they end up looking clunky and not very "cool" (as opposed to the fantasy gear of TES, or the varied retro-futuristic items of Fallout), which also applies to all the equipment and loot in the game. This once again affects players' motivations to get involved in the core loop, because if you aren't going to find a kooky weapon or a nice looking piece of armor after clearing a whole base, just more generic guns and space-suits with higher numbers, then what's the point?
Enemy variety: Because humans are the only intelligent enemies, you'll only have them to fight, with the occasional robots here and there, and they all look the same, because they are wearing the same type or "realistic" space suits, and using the same weapons as the player. In other words, there's too little variety on that front, and the different human factions having little identity in combat (e.g. how some Fallout factions are more likely to use guns, others are more likely to use melee, while yet others would use explosives).
Exploration: Real space is huge, with tons of barren and uninhabited planets, so to be realistic, the game's space has to be huge and mostly barren as well. Yet, because this is a Bethesda game, the players have to be able to explore them as well, but because there are no intelligent aliens with their own architecture, or weird and wacky "unrealistic" environment, it results in the same industrialist outposts, refineries, and caves being everywhere, because there's nothing else to choose from while maintaining the "realism".
People online have been making a huge clamor about the loading screens, and the lighting engine, and non-important NPCs looking floompy at times, but I rarely ever see these things addressed, outside of maybe saying that the game was "boring" or it "didn't click with them for some reason". I think these are the game's real issues, and some of these are definitely going to be fixed by the modding community in time (including the god-awful progression mechanics), but it just annoys me that people seem to be so bogged down in the online buzzwords they seem to skim over this core design decision that cascades down to every element of the game.
@@Horvath_Gabor i think starfield aesthetics is dissapointing with how vast potential space exploration tech design is. i wonder if bethesda actually do research about Nasa and what they discover in space
@@Horvath_Gabor But in reality, that whole "realism" mindset result is due to a lack of imagination and world experience. I would tell someone who told me that "all industrial sites look the same" that they need to travel more. People get up to some weird shit when they give creative freedom to architects and engineers. Considering the complaints I am hearing from people in the modding community, I think this was an excuse because of problems with the game engine. They were forced to limit the scope of everything and didn't see a way to code themselves out of it.
I laughed harder than I deserved to when Mauler says “Do you see how he lies??!!” Long man funny 👏🏻
NKB mentioning the Doom Bible is kind of hilarious because he tries to use it as a point about how it's an antiquated practice from the 90s, only pointing to its age, when he could instead have pointed out how the document was written by Tom Hall, who was fired early on in development, and the rest of Id Software ended up not really using the stuff in the document at all.
It's like, he could have had an argument here about a design document not being necessary to make a great game, but he completely fucks it up because he didn't even bother researching.
I think the fact he mentioned the 80's as well as the 90's is just one of those small things that shows he probably doesn't have any idea about what he's talking about.
Thank you. I'm surprised nobody efapping in this episode caught that. The Doom Bible is used by people who _actually fucking understand the history surrounding it_ as an example of a game doc being ignored so hard that it wound up being a major cause of the first of a series of significant internal fights that ultimately broke up the original id Software dream team.
Emil's job is to write stories for games.
He is terrible at writing.
Emil should be fired from that job.
If there is a job at Bethesda he is actually competent at, he can have that job instead, but from this job he should be fired.
I'm actually not certain he knows what "fired" means. No, he SHOULD be fired, he's not good at his job, that is the BEST reason to fire someone from a job.
And the most important aspect of why he should be fired, he REFUSES to accept ANY criticism and will NOT improve his writing.
That is unacceptable. I don't care how "positive" he is, it's not healthy to pretend to be infinitely positive and to never acknowledge anything that might slightly upset you.
had to come back to this after seeing it live just to say it's pretty fucked up how NKB can just weaponize emil's dead family member with the sad fucking violin music in the background and in all the reddit threads covering his video, not one person felt like calling this shit out.
I think this might be the case of it didn't even registering, even if people actually fully watched NKB's video fully. I can actually understand that. I bet most people don't watch video essays actively, so some stuff can fall through the cracks.
As a real example when the cuck thing came up i had this reaction:
1. Wait this insult seems out of place.
2. Holly hell, he did in fact make himself into a cuck in this metaphor.
3. Wait, what video is this from? I watch NKB and don't remember this.
4. Man, i actually watched the video there that segment is from. I didn't pay attention to that analogy at all and might've even think it was heartfelt, cause of the music.
Now i can't unhear it, but same could've happened to people with sad thing about Emil. They heard the music and the speech, but people might not even realize what it actually was and how weird that segment is without actively trying to think about it.
Such out of place slimy manipulation I honestly thought to myself "is this supposed to be a troll video?".
What’s crazy was how specific it was. If there was an overall sad backing music for the section on Emil as a person, it would still be manipulative, but not nearly as scummy. But no. The regular music plays, dies down, the violin fades in as he talks about his sister, then it immediately cuts out as he continues talking. Absolutely shameful.
Completely agree. Almost had an aneurysm from how angry i was when i first heard NKB pull that slimy, degenerate crap
Where do you gotta go to catch the show live? Can’t find if there’s a different channel or something for it. I’d appreciate the help.
"Keep it simple, keep it stupid." - Gandalf the Grey
“A flying nuns Reddit post” was absolutely hilarious to listen to without seeing the screen and realizing it was a username
One of the best EFAP's in a while. Excellent guests as well. Thank you massives for this one
I watched a good portion of this live. I then watched it through once, and now I'm going through one more time, and there's still layers to this whole thing. Truly, an EFAP for the ages.
So... you watched it three times and you weren't bored?
@@Soridan Listen, NKB's video is like an onion, it has layers. And layers are the only thing that bring me joy in life.
I dont like how NKB genuinely misrepresented PatricianTV. Its so funny seeing him say Patrician misrepresented Emil... then the clip of Emil that patrician misrepresented is literally the same thing.
The jazz music bit is just so, so bad. This isn't meant as an insult but are we certain NKB isnt autistic? Theres a really obvious lack of understanding of basic social cues.
That was my first take, but then he continued talking and made it abundantly clear that he was just intentionally taking anything and everything that Pat said (at least, what NeverCuckedBest _bothered_ to listen to) in the worst possible faith in a deliberate effort to misrepresent both the intended meaning and the _actual words_ that Pat said.
LOL
"People worked hard on it" is such a stupid argument. Yeah they worked hard on a product they intend to sell me, I sure as fuck hope they did.
Look at Starfield, Bethesda worked really hard on it!
Really? And this was the BEST they could do?
A lot of people worked very hard on the rings of power...
Yet it merits no honour.
To channel my inner rags "People worked really hard on the third Reich"
That last chunk is so fucking bad, I feel like I deserve something for being forced to sit through his Skyrim analogy
Have some rhino milk, my friend
You already got what you deserved though.
You get what you fucking deserve
To appreciate good rat you have to suffer through the bad ones too.
I love how this guy tried to use "has a life" as an insult
I am happy I decided to watch this from the very beginning, what a journey.
What's with bad youtubers insulting themselves in their names ?? NeverKnowsBest, Pillar of Garbage, at this point just call your channel "I'm a mor0n" and call it a day.
Wow, when I got to his claim that *any* document with elements of design is a design document, I just said "noooo, that's not it at all, this is a lie" out loud. What a disingenuous man.
He still never said that Emil was a good writer the entire video.
Maybe this is harsh to say but NKB's inability to pronounce certain words drives me up the wall. He talks like a parody of an English person.
“Emmul” lmao
@@MaxiusTheGod That is how Emil's name is pronounced. It's not "ih-meal". Patrician and Creetosis say it right, and Rags, Mauler, and Fringy usually say it wrong. Not a big deal, most people pronounce it wrong because that's how most people whose name is like that pronounce it.
@@Eingraddit also kinda depends on dialect, i personally say it 'em eel'. Its completely correct for my own regional dialect.
@@333animemasterYour regional dialect doesn't have anything to do with it. He pronounces it "ih-mul", so anything else when pronouncing his name, specifically when we're talking about him, is incorrect.
@@Eingradd...it does though, it infulences how you say words. I guess youve never been around any english speaking people then my buddy
That plot twist at the end really subverted my expections.
If something used to be great, and now it sucks, and you can identify the guy who's responsibility it is, it's fine to want him to not have that responsibility anymore.
Love the video
Just wanted to say I love Skyrim but I get why alot of people don't
The game does have a theme but it's kinda wild that the guy didn't just seem to know it or couldn't get the words out
The theme of Skyrim is pretty much about Power and the responsible use of power and the consequences of misuse.
Pretty much every major faction/side quest as well as the main quest revolve around the misuse of power
Alduin decides to misuse his power and shirks his responsibility as the world eater to enslave humanity
The head of he Thieve's Guild misuses his power of the skeleton key to only add to his own personal wealth rather than only for the responsibilities of the Nightingales
The head of the dark brotherhood tries to ignore the responsibilities of the night mother and instead causes the brotherhood to stagnate
We learn about how the dwarves seemed to have found some great power and as a result disappeared.
Ulfric Stormcloak misused the Voice powers to kill an opponent over a political war when his power wasn't meant to be involved in such things
The Winterhold was destroyed due to the misuse of magic and as a result magic users are looked at with disdain
Even the Emperor gets assassinated as a result of not using his power responsibly in the eyes of Skyrim's people when he rolled over for the Thalmor
It's arguably a pretty simple theme but it is there
Uh, except you got alot of that wrong. Alduin is never really explained; was he really supposed to destroy the world back then, when it was new? That's weird. And since the plot is to PREVENT that, it doesn't make sense to say that he was WRONG not to kill eveyone. Thieve's guild, yeah, totally correct on that one. Dark Brotherhood, like, okay, so the proper use of power is murdering because a corpse tells you to? That's rather contradictory. And Astrid just didn't believe in the stories and feared for the survival of her family, as messed up as they were--she wasn't abusive with her power. The dwarves story is from Morrowind, it's just referenced in Skyrim as part of history. Ulfric Stormcloak had a fair duel with the high king and won, and the idea that the power wasn't meant to be used for such things is just the belief of the greybeards, the very same people you IGNORE for the plot, aka, they were WRONG. And there is no explanation as to what happened in Winterhold; the mages are BLAMED, but every source inside the college says they did nothing, and speculate it was a result of the neighboring volcano going off. As for the emperor, either decision he made would be seen as not using his power reponsibly by a ton of people. No offense, but I think you're reaching to justify a game full of fun but meaningless stories.
In regards to NKB's video being an intentional trap, it's possible that pat is projecting his own competence/knowledge onto someone who isn't actually competent themselves. It's actually pretty common for smart people to overestimate the intelligence of others.
As someone who has watched a few of his other videos, he definitely was just tard raging when he made this and gathering evidence to support a conclusion rather than actually researching the topic himself. The guy is overly sensitive about negativity towards games, overly critical of critique, has a chip on his shoulder over the internet being prone to hyperbole, and really likes Starfield and Bethesda despite insistence to the contrary.
His Bad Games/Gollum video is like a prequel to this one, in it he takes a lot of drive-by potshots at Starfield criticism in very disingenuous ways, despite it being mostly unrelated to the topic.
@@MistaHoward He called FFXIV players locusts in his FFXIV review just because players consume content on release, despite locust leaving devastation in their wake and FFXIV players do not. I get the distinct impression he has a great distain for games and gamers and youtubers.
@@Edax_Royeaux He loves games, he has basically no standards for them, the guy thinks fucking FF13 and FF2 are great games. He absolutely does hate the community surrounding them and sees himself as above them all though, despite the fact that he unironically praises absolute bottom of the barrel garbage like Genshin Impact. He mistakenly believes that him having basically no standards and being easily pleased by a pretty overworld with absolutely zero substance makes him "positive" and not "a huge fucking tool". There also seems to be a huge disconnect between himself and reality for the average gamer; I think the fact that he can basically get a game "free" by making a video on it drastically colors his perception - he acts like poeple shouldn't have any reason to be angry over Starfield being bad to any degree at all, despite the fact that many of said people were literally swindled out of $100.
@@Edax_Royeaux Really? He says that about FFXIV players? He clearly has no idea about the FFXIV community as a whole
@@Grishnag85 I think he was making the point about all MMORPG players, devouring content and leaving the game a wasteland afterwards. Still I don't recall Endwalker being a wasteland after most people played the campaign. Old Sharlayan was less crowded but that was about it.
I had no idea how off the rails this shit went. I got NKBs video recommended without any prior knowledge, watched through the part with the Reddit post, roughly agreed that the speech wasn’t very important and that it’s weird everyone thinks the writing at Bethesda would improve if they fired one guy, and moved on without watching the rest of the video. I assumed the rest was just him dragging out the point that Bethesda has a lot more problems than just one writer and he would have a section about not harassing people. I didn’t realize I was but moments away from watching him descend into schizo posting
I'm in thr same boat, except I tuned out of that NKB vid riiiiight around the time he started casting aspersions at Az, ItsAGundam, and certain other people in this sphere. I felt done.
Holy GOD, what I missed.
What a ride.
This was one of the best streams in so long! I love that Pat got to shine since he didnt have much to say the last time he was on. He fits right in with the other longmen!
"Write what you know" is a pretty terrible idea given these writers mostly go from school to college/university and then go into the job market. They've done nothing so far with their life so their writing will be bad.
It needs to go hand-in-hand with "Know/Learn as much as possible", or else all you'll write is stuff that hits too close to home (and that's the best case scenario).
Better would be "know what you write." If you don't have experience with an evil assassin guild, read a book about one that actually existed. If you know nothing about a nuclear apocalypse, do research on that. If you have never been to where your story is set, take a trip there, talk to people who live there, or read a book about it.
"Write what you know" has a habit of causing people to write autobiographies instead of novels.
As an amateurish writer, I approach "write what you know" as "use your irl knowledge as a pillar" . Like in my short stories there are long and detailed fights because I started doing Karate at age 6 and even did some tournaments. A shoot out is just "people shoot guns at eachother" a close combat is " X grabs Y arm and punches Y the elbow, then swiftly kicks his foot and throws him on the ground"
I've read some cringe where people were clearly talking out of their asses, also 99% of movies/series about strong whamen are incredibly cringe since those slim teen girls/ lazy karens use heavyweight styles because production couldn't be bothered to call a female athlete.
EFAP and Furry EFAP finally collab!
Now we need a anime EFAP and human EFAP
This is the type of representation I appreciate lol
Theres a furry EFAP? That’s a new one.
@@MyGamerforlife creetosis actually hates being called that but it's turned into a joke in his stream
This is just "You've said bad things about my idol you MUST be wrong."
Yea it reeks of oxhorn logic, "youre fucking with my meal ticket so i shall destroy you as it says to do in my manlyfesto"
What I can't wrap my head around is why would anybody feel the impulse to defend anything about modern Bethesda writing? It's just bad, self evidently. Let them take their knocks or it'll never be forced to get any better.
6:09:10 That is such a good point. NKB didn't really defend Emil's work nor did he make the video for vindicating the guy. NKB just seems to have a beef with people who put up any criticism of Bethseda, and Patrician who called him a cuck and Emil was his excuse to tie his love of BGS games with hatred of his own/their critics.
NKB keeps changing his point of view on everything, and he wants to claim that Patrician is plagiarizing him? Patrician can actually argue a point without flip-flopping halfway through. It's ridiculous
I _love_ that NKB is so delusional that he actually thinks that he invented the phrase "X got the Y that X deserves."
Pat is an excellent guest
Did Mauler intentionally edit the stream to have a satisfying length/timecode because PatricianTV was on? 🤔
Patrician episode
I'm so glad that AAA developer Bethesda has brave knights like Never to defend their honor
It's so mind boggling 😂😂😂
Guess who NKB reminds me of?
Hbomberguy. the whole Internet Historian section came across like "finally I can snipe that guy that said stupid shit and make fun about LBGQT". The difference is Hbomberguy didn't need to make stuff up. The motivation behind both action looks rather personal to me
Not thinking about Hbomberguy's smug face is the only joy I have in life.
Although for the plagiarism hbomb did have actual evidence, though he did fumble a handful of examples for it, he regularly made illogical assumptions and insinuations to poison the well to get his audience to be even more against IH than they otherwise would be
Hbomberguy absolutely made stuff up to portray Internet Historian as some kind of alt right neo Nazi! The only true thing he said was about the plagiarism.
@@charlesruteal9062 ist He gay?
To be fair Hbomberguy's video was mainly about James Somerton, a leftist TH-camr.
Damn. Creetosis getting to the big boy league.
@Amarenamann who's that and why does he hate Creetosis? (I'm new to this sphere)
@@Amarenamann I'm waiting to see if he comments cuz it'd be too fucking funny
@@Amarenamann cree already made video about vincent, and we make fun of his pronociation of words sometimes
@@Amarenamann of course, vincent was asking to be responsed by other, he obsessed to get attention.
the response video sure was something which both creetosis cohost showed up in his scripted video to point out missused word that vincent keep using to sound smart than it actually was.
which i believe the video has been taken down for some reason
@@crelgen1588 He hates Cree because of his 8 hour analysis of Fallout 3. He made a really bad defense video for F3 that Cree and his co-hosts responded to in which he made a lot of brain dead arguments complete with broken English and he's been a meme in Crees fanbase ever since.
Virgin Bethesda: "It's so sad that players IGNORE our story to go do GAMEPLAY and hit things! Why can't people just play our open-world RPG the way we designed it to be played? That's the curse of making videogames; it's not like it's a movie where you can just set the pacing however you want with no interference from the audience."
The Chad SantaMonica: "It's awesome that players have an active part in telling the story. We took the liberty of recording 3 entirely different dialogue trees for each side quest so that no matter what order you play them in at what part of the game, it will always make sense and tie into what's happening on the main quest timeline. We encourage players to go and try different orders for the story with each replay, and see how the tone of the mission totally changes when it's with Freya rather than Artreus. It's really a unique blessing that we can do this in a videogame, other formats don't have this opportunity."
Another one is Itsuno with Dragon's Dogma 2 (and DMC,) "We put big tiddy Sphinx in the game as a sidequest and don't expect everyone to find her."
@@silenceyouidiotHell yeah
Nah, bethesda and emil specifically may as well have said "why bother writing an award winning story that will be remembered and beloved for decades to come cuz a few children wont bother with the story"