Borderline Personality Disorder: Sorting Fact From Fiction
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ก.ค. 2024
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There are so many persistent myths about Borderline Personality Disorder. But, the reality of being quote “borderline” is much more nuanced - and hopeful.
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Greetings
I have this clip
I was wondering
Why does this usually happens?
Okay wow! Like seriously wow!! This is I think the first Scishow episode EVER (and I've watched your vids for years) in which I've seen Scishow make mention of the fact that there's more forms of therapy than just Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The only previous episodes in which that was even hinted at were the episodes explicitly dedicated to Freudian and Jungian psychology that mentioned that both approaches still had practitioners. But any of the other approaches have never, to my knowledge, been mentioned as options for treating any condition. For anyone basing their understanding of the available psychological treatment options (besides meds) on Scishow, I wouldn't be surprised if they thought it's all just CBT (and maybe a bit of 'talk therapy', which afaik Scishow has never actually explained or defined). I know I've NEVER heard Scishow mention Dialectic Behavioral Therapy even in passing in all my years of watching this channel. So...maybe make an episode to disabuse us of this impression?...
Can you help People with Autism spectrum disorder ? Society has been Thinking That ABT which most of us autistics hate these therapy .Can you help me find a therapy i don't hate as much?
One of the most interesting points I've heard made about the trauma aspect of BPD is that sometimes the "patient" doesn't even believe their trauma was all that bad. Which makes it harder to diagnosis when someone asks about the trauma in your past and you're like "Nope, everything was good."
Most who have survived severe trauma tend to minimize their trauma (a belief furthered in part by our dissociation during those periods, so our memory of those experiences is severely fragmented, hampering recall of the trauma, particularly repeated trauma over many months to years), which is partly why it often takes many years, even decades, before finally being diagnosed with trauma-related disorders.
That’s it right there 👌
No Trauma No BPD. Really! Bp1 forever! Rock n Roll!
Speaking purely from experience, sometimes this can have to do with the narratives given by parents or a parent.
The only reason I know I even have trauma is because I have PTSD-type flashback but only with the emotions and sensations when a trigger happens
I'd love to see a video on just Dialectical Behavioral Therapy-- or maybe that and other therapy types as well! We (society) tend to talk about CBT, talk therapy, and medications, but not as much other treatments.
One interesting thing about DBT: it was developed by Marsha Linehan, who had suffered from BPD herself.
DBT is just another type of CBT talk therapy you are right that other therapies need to made more accessible .
DBT worked for me where CBT had completely failed time after time for years. Damned life saving.
@@kerielwatson3197 awww I'm so glad for you
If I wasn't so lazy I would look up and sign up for a treatment.
((Lazy in the sense I do make appointments and in some cases pay in advance for certain stuff but dont show up or stop showing up.))
@@tagaway6173 I don't like the term lazy. It implies that you're at fault and are making a choice to be not do something. From what you've said I get the feeling there's a reason you don't turn up... Even if you don't yet understand what it is.
Keep trying to get to appointments. When you make an appointment tell them you have this problem. They might schedule a phone appointment or know of an online or texting service to get you started till you can turn up.
i have bpd, i love hearing it get talked about because i feel like no one ever talks about it!
I only ever hear about it in the context of murder! I have bipolar disorder and it has a similar negative stigma.
I wasn't too afraid when this was popping up, but I still had the fear because I've been burned before when I looked up things about BPD. The way this one therapist talked about BPD just made me hate myself more. D: So I'm glad this was more factual than biased.
You probably like hearing about this because you want empathy as well
As a medical student I can say I've heard far too many doctors refer to uncooperative or difficult patients as "borderline". It's not good.
@@turdferguson3400 It goes the other way around too; if a patient has a BPD diagnosis on their file, the medical personnel treating them, doctors included, is more likely to take a more hostile, aggressive, “disciplinary” approach from the get-go, treating any sign of “disobedience” far more harshly than they would otherwise. It's a very big problem in psychiatry especially. Ironically, it's been found that medical professionals are more likely to discriminate against BPD patients than laypeople are.
I'd be really interested in an even more in-depth episode on BPD. It's an incredibly complex disorder, and an often misunderstood one. But it's a disorder that could easily fill a whole series of episodes if you wanted to really gain an in-depth understanding of it. In my opinion this would be well worth it.
Professor Sam Vaknin has a lot of videos on TH-cam
I have BPD and I just gotta say this is awesome. I've been struggling along time with it and have felt doomed, its also so hard to get help and treatment unless you have 💰 which i dont, but im not a bad person and I'm trying so hard to learn coping mechanisms and help myself. I'd love to get therapy and heal myself. Its sad when you want help and ask for help and still can't get any. We need to help people with mental health before they're in the hospital or worse. If you are living a life with mental illness, diagnosed or otherwise suspected, and feel like there's no helo for you, you are not alone in your struggle. You are seen and heard and valid. Keep fighting!💪
Thank you dear. It's good to see that typed out by another person cruisin' the interwebs. 😊
Cheering you on! 🎆
You keep fighting too! I've got a lived experience of BPD too, & have spent years seeking help, with very limited success. It's frustrating, & can sometimes feel hopeless, but I'm slowly making progress. If you ever need to chat with someone else who's living with BPD, please don't hesitate to reach out... I've got heaps of resources if you want me to send you any - I had to DIY DBT for a bit, until I could find a group I was able to access in my area that I could afford, so I've got all the books. You can look me up on Twitter, Tumblr, Insta, & most other places on the net, where I go by the username LustStarrr. I'm always keen to chat with others living with BPD - connecting with people with similar lived experience is what got me through my most hopeless times. ✌🏼
I look forward to when seeing a psychologist or some type of counselor is as normal as seeing a doctor to ensure people are doing okay whether it's acute things like a sudden loss or a mental health disorder so everyone can get the help they need.
You may find the book “Loving Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder” by Shari Manning helpful to share with those you are closest to as it does a pretty decent job of describing BPD to others and conveys to them tools to help better relate to those with BPD through regular reassurance and frequent validation as well as facilitating the establishment of boundaries. I learned about that book awhile back from my therapist when we were discussing my one and only relationship some 26 years ago with a girlfriend (a close friendship that grew into a romance) who was an undiagnosed Borderline (this is back in the early 90s when DBT was only in its earliest infancy) and I have always struggled with a sense of guilt that I was unable to get her to seek the help she needed (or even to recognize she needed help, though it turns out that it would have likely been close to another decade before effective help was widely available through DBT). It is a book much too late to change the past but I do wish such had existed back then as it would have helped immensely to reduce the magnitude of violence and abuse (not all Borderlines are violent, but some are quite violent when splitting). Maybe it might have saved me as well as that one relationship destroyed what was left of my ability to trust others (Complex PTSD from severe peer abuse throughout my teens, enough to have caused my health to collapse by age 18 leaving me forever disabled) and ultimately locked me into the path of AvPD and an extremely lonely life as an adult (if you can imagine a very isolated life with essentially zero intimacy of any sort where even being around other persons is difficult and anxiety provoking and there exists no trust because virtually every bit of trust you ever extended others in life was ultimately met with betrayal...so why would one trust anybody...ever, you get the idea how lonely that becomes). We were both broken by the abuse of other people, I never hated her despite the violence but I did have to leave after being repeatedly battered as living in perpetual fear for your life isn’t much of away to live no matter how much you love someone. But I have often wondered that if I knew then what I know all these years later might things have turned out quite differently as at the time she was undiagnosed and I had literally no idea whatsoever what was going on with her, though it was certainly evident just how much distress she was in at times, and I had no idea how to react...nor did my tendency to withdraw and dissociate necessarily help with her fears.
I wish you all the best!
Thank y’all so much for this. I’ve had “friends” make terrible comments about people with BPD without knowing I’m diagnosed. Most memorably, that all people with BPD are “vicious” and “inherently manipulative.” Interestingly, I’m also diagnosed with Bipolar II.
Ignorance hurts and can be deadly, but hopefully science can help us fight the stigmas surrounding mental health.
Same here love! ❤
If you have BPD, you may feel alone and helpless, but life can get better. It's not an easy road, nor is it simple, but life can be brighter. Don't give up. You are loved.
Thank you!!!!!!!!!
Needed this today, thanks man
.. thanks.. now im crying lol 🎉... In the good way
It's not good to self diagnose, but I think I might have to see a shrink. This hits pretty close lol
Please, please, go see Dr. Daniel Fox here on TH-cam. He changed my life.
They only mentioned volatile emotions and a "vague sense of identity" (I honestly don't even know what that means).
It's good to do research if you've been dismissed by careless doctors and spent years with no diagnosis and no treatment. But going to a doctor or psycologist and telling them you believe you may have such condition only because a few vaguely described symptoms seemed to match yours will impair their ability for proper diagnosis, because you're making them biased. Only communicate your suspicion when you've found amazingly accurate similarities between your experiences and those testified by diagnosed patients, or heard detailed and exemplified explanations of what the disorder is like and really go "that's exactly my story!".
@Aron Toulouse sorry to hear bro, still need to get checked out myself, but first I'd like to catch up with Corona bills since I was furloughed
I’m too young for a diagnosis though. If I was an adult, I WOULD have a quiet BPD diagnosis.
Really? I was self-diagnosed before being actually professionally diagnosed with BPD
A few months ago I got my official bpd diagnosis. Just getting the diagnosis, having a therapist well versed in it and willing to work with me has changed so much. I like seeing videos and people talk like this because it makes it easier to cope.
That's really great. I'm glad you were able to find someone able to provide the help you needed to get better. I know that getting treatment for my mental illnesses has helped so much and probably saved my life. I'm always happy when other people are ready to take that step and are in a place to actually be able to take it because I've already experienced for myself how much it can help when you find the right doctor/therapist to work with.
I have BPD, well I control BPD .it's a daly challenge,of meditation which I believe helps me control it . thank you for your video.
DBT isn't just for those with BPD, I've found some of it useful to manage my autism symptoms such as distress tolerance to manage my 'meltdowns' or the emotional regulation module to help me identify and manage emotions. Shame that I can't handle groups so I couldn't do the full program.
I was suspected of having BPD because apparently female + self harm = BPD and I also struggle with emotions. After much discussion with various mental health professionals and an in depth assessment with a psychologist, it seems that ASD is the correct diagnosis.
DBT isn’t just used for BPD but it was developed for BPD. BPD had not treatment (or no good treament) and the creator of the therapy has BPD. It was made to treat BPD symptoms, but many other disorders have overlapping symptoms and thus can also benefit from the therapy.
And yes BPD and autism have some overlapping symptoms, that’s why lots of autistic females are misdiagnosed woth BPD. Some people have both though! Like myself.
I'm glad you were able to find something to help you handle your emotions better!
I have a friend who has BPD. I don't always get along with them because of their mood swings, but they're still one of my greatest friends. And they're getting better now that they've been doing talk therapy for awhile.
I was so nervous clicking on this, I was diagnosed young and have dealt with a lot of stigma since.
I have managed to avoid being stigmatized only by the reason that no one around me had heard of bpd before
Same.
@@amandaamanda6157 I think the worst is medical..I went to a psychologist for attention and anxiety issues. When he found out I have BPD he said he really couldn't give me any "individual help" and suggested group therapy. I am too anxious for group therapy and I wasn't there for my BPD issues, everything changed when he found out. He acted like everything I said was an effort to manipulate him.
Yeah, honestly, the way one's treated by medical and psych professionals is traumatizing in and of itself. I've even been told the stress of being around a borderline partner was why my boyfriend battered me--something which he picked up on gladly and then used as an excuse for continuing to do so. It's interfered with both diagnosis and treatment for real medical conditions.
I very much wish I had never been diagnosed, and certainly not at a young age. I would never encourage someone to get diagnosed with BPD unless they had to to get a specific form of treatment covered. It's been quite literally hazardous to my health because professionals treat borderlines like complete dirt.
@@cbowd jfc... I'm so sorry hun, that is so out of line I cannot even articulate it.
i love that you guys made this one, I was diagnosed with BPD back in 2002, but after 2 years of DBT I was declared cured by the top BPD specialist in all of Canada in 2014. I also have bipolar so I still handle those symptoms but with light medication (just lithium) I have my symptoms under control for the last few years. No sign of my bpd has returned in over 6 years. I just want people with borderline to know THERE IS HOPE FOR RECOVERY and they should not ever give up!!!! Thank you thank you thank you!!!
Which hospital and treatment, at what age, but isn't bi-polar renamed as borderline now, & it is the same?
@@miss_8thwonder I was at windsor west hospital and hotel-dieu also in windsor ontario, in 2002. I later did DBT in Orebro sweden, at USO hospital. Bipolar is NOT renamed borderline this is a common misconception, bipolar is a brain problem caused by incorrect genes and also chemical levels in the brain. borderline is a personality disorder caused by genetic predisposition to the condition combined with environmental factors (ie your parent leaves you as an infant which happened to me). They are similar and have many overlapping symptoms so are often confused for one another but 2 completely different methods of treatment. Bipolar is medically treated with medicine, borderline will not improve without many years of intense therapy. Hope that helps you!
@@miss_8thwonder I was diagnosed MDD at 16, which became bipolar 1 and borderline both at age 22, my doc said its irresponsible to diagnose someone as BPD under age 21.
@@brisetta SINCE from what age did you suffer up until, because it feels left out, people have all kinds of love, care, support socially and get the opportunity over me, like in my absence (less competitive to win) but you don't even exist and misunderstood and get abandon, and isolate! Even from a physiatrist and general physician, you gets emotionally abused randomly, when you seek out help, without being explained & made aware of your conditions, my covert narcissist mom took advantage of it and used me against it, for her own benefit! Just by the few symptoms, I believe she might be one the who caused it, but I have been experiencing it with her since my teenage, emotional Neglect & constant emotional abuse, with triangulation and silent treatment and co-dependency so I somehow feel responsible that she is not covert & it covers her reality & intent under my Bpd
The world hasn't been so fair to me ever, they labelled my bpd as me a playgirl or something
Because I developed Cushing syndrome, a rare genetic condition at the age of 8, Is it the cause that I developed BPD? Due to Cushing? I was born into a narcissistic family, they trained me to put their needs & wants first
@@miss_8thwonder I suffered around age 16 onward, but thy ccouldnt call it anything yet as i was too young. I have no experience with cushings at all and i dont think its related im relly sorry for your poor experiences though
as someone struggling to accept my diagnosis, the thing about a lack of sense of self... really hit home. is that really something only BPD people have? because i've never had a sense of self.
*puts on professional hat* I don't know that it is ONLY people with BPD but I personally wouldn't diagnose BPD unless it were present. Trauma can temporarily disrupt a sense of self so I'll see it sometimes in people with PTSD but in that case it's a sense of self that was developed and then got shaken. The theoretical background I was taught from sees the lack of sense of self in BPD as a developmental issue. In the case of many people who DID develop BPD from early life chronic abuse, it's like managing the trauma left no time or space for self-development so you have adults who feel totally unmoored. I'd imagine that in cases where it isn't a result of abuse, the timing of the trigger was such that it caused the same disruption in development. The good news is, you can absolutely develop a sense of self later on in life.
SAME!!!!!! I struggle with it to a point of it being debilitating!!!
Honest question: what is a sense of self supposed to be?
You will find that same broken sense of self in those of us with Complex PTSD and AvPD as well.
Hudaef Cares? It is your sense of self-identity...literally knowing who and what you are, what you do and do not stand for, what you do or do not feel, the value you see in yourself and believe others see in you, etc. Speaking as someone with C-PTSD and AvPD, my teen years were entirely defined by severe peer abuse and complete social rejection, along with some lesser issues at home as well, after moving to a new rural school at age 12 where I was promptly rejected for “being different”. A level of constant unending abuse for years that was literally sufficient to completely destroy my physical health by age 18 leaving me permanently disabled even today at age 48 (I live every day with severe pain and many other chronic health issues caused by that abuse decades ago). Think of all the self discovery you went through in your teenage years through early twenties, especially think about all your interpersonal experiences with respect to peers, friends, and lovers and then imagine having grown up totally excluded from all that while also programmed by those highly abusive interactions with others to totally reject yourself as infinitely flawed and unworthy of all those things, even love and companionship, that everyone else takes for granted as part of their development into early adults and you come to understand why our sense of self is so utterly shattered by that interaction between the abuse we received and our genetic susceptibility (predisposition) to a mental disorder/illness should we happen to encounter such a sufficiently extreme stressor that sets the disorder in motion.
Interesting topic for me. I was diagnosed with BPD mistakenly after being falsely diagnosed with MS all due to a b12 deficiency
How did any of that happen sorry if it’s a personal question I’m just curious
@@ediesongbird3163 B12 deficiency can manifest with mental symptoms. This may cause the patient to be falsely diagnosed with mental health problems
I'm so sorry to hear about that.
HOW did they go from MS (muscular dystrophy?) to BPD??? Sometimes I feel like doctors are the crazy ones.
Catherine Tran interesting I never know lacking b12 could be so serious very sad
I kinda do like these factchecks.
Can we have more?😊
Can I see you 🐓😉🍤
Topic that needs most attention
It's treatable? O, wow. I have hope for the first time in a long time. Actually crying 😂 thank you
It is! I'm a therapist, I've treated folks with BPD and I've seen people become much happier and healthier.
Honestly that's amazing. I really want to get better but my GP said that couldn't happen and all i could do was try not to be so sensitive about things. And whilst I believe he meant well, that was not helpful 😂
@@aalin5701 I have been diagnosed with BPD almost 10 years ago. My (great and understanding, not stigmatizing) psychologist told me this week that in her opinion, I still have traits, but I might not even meet the full criteria anymore to get the diagnosis; it's stable and no longer impacting every aspect of my life.
I've done DBT (in Quebec we only get it for 16 weeks but eh...) and it changed my life. I did apply the techniques very religiously, and over years and years, but YES, WE CAN GET BETTER!!!
Alice!!!! Go to Dr. Daniel Fox here on TH-cam! He saved my life!!!!
@@simonmartineferland9419 lol. I had to do a double take, because I too was diagnosed almost 10 years ago and this week was told that I still have traits, but likely wouldn't meet specific criteria anymore.
Congrats to you. 😃
And OP, I hope it helps knowing there are a lot of us who no longer meet criteria. When I was diagnosed I was told that with treatment I might not meet criteria within ten years. Now in this video he says such a high percentage don't after 1 year? That's incredible. Plus, almost any person could actually benefit from DBT. It's good stuff. Good luck!
2:57 It goes the other way around, too. Many who are diagnosed with BPD have Bipolar II Disorder, which is notoriously hard to spot. People don't usually report hypomanic days. I mean, no one sees a doctor because they had a great day. They go because of the horrible depression.
But a huge problem is that a lot of doctors still don't ask if there's times of elevated mood and motivation. And they don't catch that paranoia and rage aren't always because of depression or BPD.
It's reported it takes 8-10 years for those with Bipolar II to get the proper diagnosis and treatment. It would save a lot of lives if docs would ask the right questions.
I feel like people with BPD are really misunderstood (myself included), glad these points were cleared here!
I have a sibling with BPD and this video is super helpful in understanding what is happening. Thanks for sorting out the facts.
this video is barely touching on what I've come to know about this disorder. I'm going to check my old phone because having been mistakenly diagnosed with Bpd I searched for answers. I found an entire channel with playlists that described the symptoms in the BDSM(the psychiatrist big book of crazy) . Though, much like you, it gave me understanding of family members who did actually suffer from it. This (Sci-show) video was misleading because the information on heritability is a misnomer (PBS "Second Opinion " & the channel mentioned before stated that it was not inherited but learned behavior! However you tend to incorporate the same damaged coping mechanisms as you are raised with. SciShow also has failed to mention that there are 9 symptoms of BPD and that you have to be expressing at least 5 of them to be diagnosed. Nor that there are multiple ways that the 9 symptoms can manifest. Sorry for not having the TH-cam channel name but It came up when I searched for BPD and Bipolar so good luck. having much love for everything SciShow, this is the second video of late that I have found to be inaccurate (the other was about the alignment of planets and solar cycles and the deep time effects on earth climate) You were one of my few trusted sources
@@htopherollem649 Inaccurate?? He was saying MYTHS of......not symptoms of.....
The way the 2014 article is discussed here is really sus. Only 78 particupants were used in the experiment and only 47 of them received DBT. So yes, 77% of them significantly improved after a year of DBT, but that’s 77% of 47 people, which is 36 people. This sample size is so so small. It’s enough to warrant further experiments, but not enough to be site in the way it is in this video. It’s incredibly misleading and from a personal standpoint, as someone with BPD who has done a year of DBT, this stretch of the truth didn’t make me feel “hopeful” it made me feel like a failure for not being better yet, and made me worry further than I already do that I’ll be one of the BPD population who never gets better. Please correct this.
A little less than a year ago me and my therapist both felt I met almost all of the 9 criteria for BPD. Now, having gone through DBT since August, I don’t believe I meet the criteria to be diagnosed with BPD
Congratulations!
i am so glad for you
I'm a nerd-fighter with BPD and I am living proof of the fact that therapy and medication can help a borderline live a normal life.
@tripticentral what medication do you take that helps?!?
Didn’t know BPD in a lack of identity ran side by side.
I’ve always felt like all I could really be is a mimic that replicated other people’s actions. It makes me feel guilty and like I really don’t have anything to my sense of self. I’ve gotten better but I still don’t feel like me as a person really exist anywhere out there anymore.
I know I had dream when I was really little but they sorta just left and now I don’t really even remember them at all. I don’t know, it just makes me feel more like a shell then a really person.
I feel you, regarding the identity part . it's so harsh to not know who you are. i sometimes feel like a leaf blown by the wind in which direction it pleases.
It's more of a shifting sense of self. One minute you feel one way and the next minute you've completely changed. Sounds like you might have MDD
I battled this for over 30 years, was misdiagnosed with major depressive disorder, then bipolar, was given SSRIs and SNRIs that exacerbated my suicidal behaviours. Finally arrived at a BPD diagnosis, and dove into DBT. That helped a lot, but the anxiety and depression were still so tough to battle constantly. Five months ago I started magnesium supplements - glycinate and taurate, with zinc, D3 and B-complex. Turned my life around 180 degrees almost instantly. I still practice DBT, but the anxiety and panic attacks are gone, and it is so much easier to manage. Chronic magnesium deficiency... which only worsened over the years, aggravated by my caffeine consumption, calcium supplements, poor diet, and stress.
Wow. I’m in social work and we have always treated BPD as untreatable. I’ve referred people to mental health programs and housing and had them declined because BPD is untreatable so it doesn’t make sense to put them in. Any chance you can cite those papers so I can use them in the future?
There are MANY links in the sources. Hope that helps
You should refer them to an LCSW. I had one as a teenager, and his help & support has, unquestionably, saved my life. MHIDD services can also help you navigate a person's needs, and be an advocate for them.
As someone with bpd... Damn this comment hurt to read :/ I'm glad we've come so far with stigma but it sucks that there are people and organisations out there who still have the perception it's untreatable (not speaking about you, Jamie! glad you found this educational in a positive way :) )
Sources are linked in the description. I also recommend checking out Kati Morton’s channel-she has many videos about BPD and the difficulties in treatment.
BPD is not untreatable, it is just very difficult to treat (as are most personality disorders due to a lack of insight) and many refuse to treat them as they can be very high maintenance patients during their worst periods. 30 years ago one could certainly say it was untreatable as no known treatments existed back then, but today it is treatable if you can get the Borderline to willingly seek out a competent therapist who specializes in BPD and knows how to work with such patients and have a patient willing to stick with their treatment.
Thank you for this video - very interesting.
I think one important point that was missed is that many people with CPTSD (Complex post-traumatic stress disorder) are misdiagnosed as having BPD. Part of the problem is that CPTSD still does not exist as a separate diagnosis in the DSM, so in many parts of the world people 'cannot' be diagnosed with this disorder.
There is some overlap between BPD and CPTSD. For example, both include emotional disregulation, and for those of us who got CPTSD from childhood abuse, we often struggle with having a solid sense of self when we get older (abusive families often prevent the development of a sense of self). However, there are also some real differences, such as the emotional flashbacks that occur with CPTSD but not BPD, and the underlying trauma that is an inherent part of CPTSD but not necessarily so for BPD.
Unfortunately, because CPTSD does not officially exist as a diagnoses, mental health professional often lump those with CPTSD into the 'next nearest' classification, which is often BPD.
Also unfortunately, by including those with CPTSD with an incorrect BPD diagnosis in a research study of those with BPD, the results of the research will necessarily be skewed. So, it is not surprising that it is so difficult for researchers to get any type of non-mixed results. BPD is already a complex topic to study without also adding the skew of accidentally including CPTSD.
It is beyond time that those who make the DSM to take those of us with CPTSD seriously. To ignore us and pretend that we do not really exist harms and makes it more difficult to get appropriate treatment not just those of us with CPTSD but also those with other disorders. All of us would benefit from research done specifically on what ails us rather than having to rely on research that is clouded with extraneous influences, or which does not even include us at all (if it is not in the DSM it will get no research funding).
I have childhood CPTSD that I still occasionally get mental and emotional flashbacks from, but I thankfully don't have BPD and I never thought I might have it despite also having ADHD and autism. The BPD lack of sense of self seems absolutely hellish.
I was diagnosed with BPD and I really appreciate this video. There is so much misinformation out there and many times people think we're monsters. 😢
I was diagnosed almost ten years ago... And to see all of the hope now... It really gives me hope to keep going. Being BPD isn't a death sentence
Not a death sentence, just a miserable life sentence.
hello. i have some questions for you, if you are ok to answer: how much therapy did you do? What kind of therapy did you do? Only your symptoms went lower? Or you managed to integrate yourself and know a bit of who you are now ? And I dunno, anything you feel like sharing would be appreciated. I am curious what can happen after a lot of therapy, guessing that you did therapy for many years
as someone with BPD this video truly means so much to me, thank you to the SciShow team for bringing light to something so important to me and many others
I agree, i also have bpd and have also completed dbt, it really does help, i will be saving this video to my playlist and using as an educational video for people who ask me about it
My mom has borderline personality disorder and I feel like this video helped me understand and empathize with her in a better way. Thank you!
Hey so I recently got diagnosed with BPD and I just am really thankful for how kindly you describe it! A lot of people describe BPD from the standpoint of having a relative with BPD and how they tend to be abusive. There’s a massive stigma in my new friend group around BPD and unfortunately as I’ve been trying to get more friendshipy they’re sort of on high alert for any BPD swings. I’ve spent a lot of time an energy with DBT therapy to manage my BPD and I’m at a point where my partner thinks I’m handling things better than she has been.
TLDR: Thanks for putting out a video being kind to folks suffering from BPD!
Hearing this makes me angry at my dad's parents for suggesting I was taking drugs because of my Swift mood shifts as a pre-teen (I've been diagnosed and was definitely suffering back then, besides the whole...oh I don't know, ALMOST BEING A TEENAGER thing.)
As someone with BPD, thank you for this. It’s given me words to express what I deal with daily.
I have been diagnosed with this. I'm sick and tired of the stigma of it.
I was diagnosed with both Borderline Personality Disorder and Bipolar NOS when I was 16. The Bipolar diagnosis was eventually found to be false and I got the proper diagnosis of PTSD.
I've never agreed with the BPD diagnosis. Mostly because no one has really been able to tell me what it is.
Thank you for this video SciShow
BPD basically is PTSD that happens before the brain is fully developed. It's the most closely related disorder to BPD.
My sister has BPD and I wish there were more videos that discussed what behaviors to look for and how to avoid escalation. I wish she would go into the therapy mentioned. I wish my mom had the guts to tell her when her behavior hurts others and that it's not okay. I'd been working on improving our relationship for years, reaching out to spend time, making meals, and then she at some point decided that I no longer deserved to be treated with dignity in family group situations. It made me sad because I thought we were way past that. If I told her it hurts my feelings she wouldn't think that was valid. It needs to be my mom and she won't do it. Ughhh.
That doesn't sound like BPD. That sounds like NPD. Most people with BPD can recognise right from wrong, and don't usually want to be hurting themselves or others. They just do. But it's not done flippantly. Only narcissists hurt people with no remorse or recourse of their behaviour.
Thank you so much for this! I have BPD and the stigma around it from society at large and MH professionals is absolutely awful. It is so amazing to see a light being shone on it with facts and understanding.
I had heard that BPD was this horrible diagnosis from my late wife, a psychotherapist, and her uncle, also a psychotherapist. They often spoke disparagingly about people with BPD, calling them crazy and untreatable. When my daughter was diagnosed with 'BPD-like traits' I went straight to denial. I didn't want to acknowledge it, read about it, or even think about it. She was put on mood stabilizing medication, which as far as I can tell hasn't helped. Had I known what I know now then, I would have saved us both a lot of suffering and she would be well on her way to recovery. My way of being with her has drastically changed. I work hard on validating her experience (the valid parts, of course) and I'm much better at recognizing triggers. She's weaning off of the lamotrigine and working with a new therapist. I hope to get started on a BPD program in the near future (it is SO expensive). The damage these myths create is real and incalculable.
I am so glad to hear you input, i have no relationship to my narcisistic mother, so hearing your side of the coin is so heartwarming and i feel so good for you and your daughter.
When the doctor told me i prob have bpd (i have impulsive pd, which is thought to be the borderline variant) i was in a very hard place, hearing all these comments about how people with bpd are "crazy", "manipulative" nd "abusive" made me only believe that i am a bad person and not deserving of love, with time (and one more not that easy diagnosis of bd ii) i started to accept that thats just who i am and it does not mean i'm bad or anything. All a bpd diagnosis mean is that we experience emotions and the world diferently and might have a hard time with some things.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, wishing you and your daughter all the best.
@@ohdarling6657 Thank you for sharing your story. Seeing how things led you to believe you were a "bad" person brought tears to my eyes. I spent years believing that too. I suffer from the same emotional dysregulation that you and my daughter do. My life has been difficult because I only focused on the negative aspects - heightened fear ("I'm a coward"), anxiety, and anger ("I'm crazy/dangerous"). At various times I swore off relationships. I got therapy, but it was of little help - these therapists had no clue what was going on with me. At some point I realized that I also experienced great love, joy, and passion as well as those other emotions. I loved music, and that love kind of saved me. The more I focused on that, the more I loved myself and saw that I had value. My mother had narcistic traits and possibly BP (she died when I was 19). She belonged to a charismatic church, believed she could speak in tongues, that Satan was real, and that Jesus intervened directly in her life. When I was 16, she came to believe I was possessed by Satan and lied to police that I had threatened to kill her and had me thrown in detention. I went into foster care. A year and a half later I moved back in with her and cared for her as she was terminally ill. She passed a year and half later. I felt immense relief. I felt free, like my life was my own. Yes, we experience emotions differently, and that's a wonderful way to view it.
I'm an adult child of a single BPD mother, and all the scars that come with it. I wish there was more in regards to my side to this insidious condition. I lost my Mom in February, and I'm struggling to find myself without her perception of the world. 😔
There is a great book "The borderline mother" which helps. As does a sh!t ton of therapy. Keep talking and healing. Normal life is not dramatic if you don't want it to be.
I am also on that side of it. Look for a good therapist, if you don’t have one already. It helps. Things can get better with time. My condolences on the loss of your mother.
Thanks for the replies! That was actually the very first book I read about this subject. I've often referred back to it, and like y'all, I've recommended it, too.
My BPD mom passed 14 year ago. Flat out horrid for 81 years.
I finally have peace. I miss her the person, not all the flipping drama drama drama drama.
Nothing but scorched Earth all around her.
Im so glad you guys made this video. I have BPD and its made my life miserable and confusing but DBT really gave me hope. It is way more useful than regular talk therapy just as this video says. I'm hoping people who suffer from this illness will see this video and know 1. It is treatable and 2. DBT is very important! I'm so sorry to anyone suffering now I know it hurts so much.
I was diagnosed with BPD several months ago, and was devastated when I started reading about it. If only this video had come out then! this was so helpful and heartwarming to me as a long time scishow/vlogbrothers viewer. Thank you, Hank. The world needs to talk about this more, and without spreading misinformation.
Thank you so much for making this video. It is so hopeful and gives me so much motivation to help my sister, who was diagnosed two years ago. She was prepared to live with it, and it pained me so much so watch that. This gives us so much hope.
oh my goodness i love this!!!! as someone with bpd, it actually made me cry seeing someone talk about it and debunk the myths that are so heavily associated with the disorder. thank you so much for this video.
As a BPD person who has other psychiatric comorbid chronic conditions, this video is refreshing. Most psychologists, psychiatrists and psych nurses are the ones who perpetuate the stigma and kinda make you feel helpless. Only with the fact that most of them avoid providing services to BPD patients because "we are difficult, specially difficult... Challenging, manipulative (yes we can be, I try my best not to but I just can't tell when I'm being that way) with such a heavy emotional lability, so demanding, so clingy, so burning". We don't mean to be this way.
Thanks for not portraying us as a lost cause, as monsters. We are humans, with a bunch of emotional knots, but with therapy we figure them out and untangle them.
I specifically take a regime of medication (similar to a BP treatment) and take frequent sessions of therapy. Mot DBT but Gestalt therapy, and has helped me a lot. I keep the hope. If I get better but won't get cured I don't think I failed, at that time I'll have the social skills and self regulation tools I need.
There is hope, don't be ashamed, don't allow nobody to stigmatize you, you have a condition, the condition doesn't define you.
Love to all fellas in this battle and the support fellas, family and friends who don't abandon us.
This is so needed and (as always) so well done! I would love an episode about BPD stigma relating to manipulation. There are lots of blogs and books about "recovering" from being around someone with BPD, it can cast a bad light on what the psychological processes are that we are going through to react such a way (scrambling to get needs met). Thanks as always for covering a sensitive topic so kindly and factually!
Working in mental health, I will tell you that probably one of the more difficult things in researching borderline personality is that the more severe cases are manipulative as all get-out. I see patients with a multitude of diagnosis, very few of them even relating to what would be borderline related. I know a number of patients who enjoy having diagnosis like autism, bipolar disorder, and disassociative disorders. However, when you work with them for even 15 minutes on the floor, you realized very quickly that they are borderline. Many of these have to do with personalities long with their borderline disorder. I can't go into full details, but they are some of the most difficult patients we deal with. And it isn't that the borderline, it's that they're being treated for conditions they don't have.
My mum and I have both been diagnosed with traits, her a few years before me, and she's doing amazingly now, I'm still a bit all over the place, but for all our lives until then we were told depression anxiety, which we do have but it's not what's been in the driver's seat this whole time
I just finished divorcing an extremely manipulative (abusive) person who appears to have BPD but I can't say that she officially has it because she refuses to see someone which might lead to diagnosis. All I can say is that the manipulation was astounding.
I highly recommend the book "Stop Walking on Eggshells" if you have someone with BPD in your life.
Unfortunately, several professionals all told me that there is effectively no treatment for it. Certainly not if the person doesn't want to be diagnosed and treated. So here we are.
People who are manipulative or have BPD are not the only ones who enjoy having a diagnosis. My whole childhood I was involuntarily different and punished for it, and I had so much self hatred for "being wrong".
Finding out I had ADHD and autism in my 30s was one of the best things that happened to me because I could finally understand why I was so involuntarily abnormal. I could also use it as a shield when people tried to bully me for being different ("I have autism, of course I am weird. Thank you Captain Obvious") because I struggle hard enough to be normal as is, if I slip up that was not intentional.
It is incredibly freeing to have your daily struggles acknowledged and validated. It is incredibly valuable to be able to find peers who understand what you are going through. (Edit: the ADHD medication makes a gigantic difference too, to be able to calm down like that and just focus is amazing - it has been more effective than meditation ever was, not that meditation isn't a good habit.)
Invisible disabilities suck, at least knowing what I have I now can skip all the self hatred and put that energy into more productive things like even more learning from other people's coping mechanisms and self-management tools thanks to knowing exactly what labels to use now.
i was “officially” diagnosed (if that even means anything, i guess?) with tourette syndrome, ocd and adhd when i was a little kid, and later on a neuropsychiatrist told me they were absolutely sure i have aspergers syndrome so i tell people i was “officially” diagnosed with autism because in canada where i live we dont use the term aspergers anymore because of the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders going from 4 to 5.... but, i worry a lot about whether im manipulating people and/or abusing them... like for instance the moment i finished writing the above part of this comment, i felt bad about the fact that i usually just say i have Official diagnoses without putting it in quotes and acting like i dont believe in my diagnosis, and *NOW* i feel guilty for even leaving that in up there just so i can criticize it down here to bring up a false sense of trustworthiness, and.... so on & so on, i guess.... do you think i have borderline disorder? i agree with the commenter just above me who says that an accurate diagnosis *can* bring someone great relief if they didn’t know what they had or even that it had a name or that it’s something other people go thru, let ALONE that they get to learn a new thing to type into google to find resources for their specific condition... and im sorry for essentially asking personal advice from a physician outside of a checkup; i understand that that’s not how it works for important systematic reasons. also i understand i sound like a hypochondriac... especially because these days, i wonder if i really ever had ADHD at all, and that my inability to focus was actually maladaptive daydreaming all along...
Thank you so much! I’ve been a fan of sci show since I was 13-14 and I’m 22 now!
I have BPD and it’s really nice to hear you all address the myths around it. I’ve been misdiagnosed a bunch of times and many doctors I’ve seen don’t even understand what I have.
Thanks for doing your part in removing the stigma and correcting the narrative ❤️
This video came at SUCH perfect timing. After being told I probably had EUPD/BPD in February, the world went into lockdown and I've not received any support from mental health services since. I turned to Google, but all I read was that BPD is basically a death sentence, which is the last thing I need when I'm already struggling with suicidal thoughts. This video really helped put things into perspective and helped me to understand my life isn't necessarily doomed because of this highly stigmatized disorder. I'm not sure if you'll ever see this comment, Hank, but if you do I just wanted to say thank you so much.
It’s definitely not a death sentence and I know that it gets better over time - even without intervention.
Please check out Dr. Daniel Fox's channel. It's not a substitute for professional in-person therapy but it definitely helps.
I dated a girl with this once, and it was the worst relationship of my life. I had never heard of it until after our relationship had ended. I knew after 1 week it would end (I was ready to end it then) though she wanted to try to make it work. I'm pretty chill but I found myself fighting/arguing with her every day we hung out. I never knew what would/wouldn't upset her. I had never argued with anyone else so much before. My sister has bipolar disorder, and I can say BPD is definitely different. She would get mad about things I could never understand. One time we got in a fight because I text her after work to ask her how her day was, and that made her mad because she said if she said she didn't have a good day, then I would get mad and upset at her. I tried to explain I wouldn't; it's okay to have a bad day, but she wouldn't have it. It turned into an 8 hour conversation. Things like that happened all the time. It was a nightmare.
I was misdiagnosed with bpd when I was with my abusive ex, after leaving him all the symptoms went away
You stole that joke
@@PraiseTheFSMonster I wish I could say I stole this "joke" but nope unfortunately that's the oh so haha funny reality of my past. Thanks for laughing at me and my trauma
@@kittenseven4269 Why would I laugh at a bad joke that's also your sad life
That was very interesting! Over 15 years ago, I had a roommate who was (wrongfully) treated for bipolar disorder. It was a disaster! 😂 A few years after, she was correctly diagnosed with bpd, and she’s now married and has two daughters. I loved her with all my heart from the day I met her, and I still do now! 🥰 So no, you’re not doomed with bpd!
My sister was diagnosed with BPD, and me and my other sister show the majority of traits seen with it.
I used to have a lot of really bad reactions, but overtime and with a lot of love I’ve gotten much better. Still, I have issues but I can recognize and calm myself down now.
I love how I’m finding out MORE information in this video about my BPD diagnosis than I learned from my psychiatrists/therapists. Thank YOU!!
Hank, you just helped me understand more about myself and gave me a valuable resource to show others whom don't understand what i go through. I appreciate this video so much
This video gave me words to describe feelings I haven't been able to put words to from dealing woth my symptoms! Incredible!
Thank you for doing this video, having recently been diagnosed with this after being misdiagnosed for years and not knowing anything about this illness it was very scary and hard to describe to others (the name has so many negative connotations). The more info out there the better! A thing to note is, at least in the UK, a lot of the field now refer to it as EUPD (emotionally unstable personality disorder) to try and move away from the negative connotations of borderline. Theres also a few subtypes if you ever wanted to do a more in depth video! Again thank you for this video, always loved your videos and the info you give!
The worst part of BPD is not having the money to get proper treatment.
As someone who suffers from BPD, I really appreciate this episode. Great job, SciShow team!
We are not inherently manipulative or broken people, we actively try not to be bad people/friends/partners. As my first therapist explained- everyone has different states of mental health, some have issues with chemicals, some have issues with wiring. BPD is more of a wiring issue and that what makes it complicated because 9/10 it co-morbid with something else.
Having been misdiagnosed as Bi-polar the meds the put me on made me go psychotic until lithium, amd then I felt absolutely nothing...and I hated it.
CBT & DBT therapy really helped sort my thoughts and emotions but I quit because I got into an argument with my psych.
Fast forward a few years later when I'm in a manic panic state because I'm losing control and my emotions were swing everywhere I went back to therapy. This time it was a mix of talk & EDMR, which is normally used for PTSD
Turns out I also had CPTSD (and ADHD) but it worked and I mentally use all 3 of those therapies to keep from spinning out again
What is EDMR? I have CPTSD, and would like to lean more about it. Also, i always thought DBT is a type of CBT - are they 2 different therapies? I was introduced to both by the same therapist (who was actually just the one mental health nurse at my university, so though she was very helpful and kind and great, I don't think I'd trust her subject matter expertise per se). Thanks! Hope you're doing okay :)
Great video! I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder 5 years ago and will be talking to a therapist about the possibility of BPD soon, and it was great to hear a little more information!
Good luck to you. I wish you the best in your journey
Dating a girl with bpd I love her so much she’s my everything
i'm so glad to hear that. wish you 2 the best
This has been the best explanation of BPD that I have ever heard. Thank you.
I really would love an more in-depth video on BPD as a whole! This one was just awesome
Finally a source more reliable than your typical internet or college person
This is the video I’ve been waiting for omg
this is lovely, well thought out and said as always, thank you
Thank you! 😚 And what a handsome and charming host! Hanks a lot!
And by the way I wonder how many with bpd have parents with a high alcohol consumption?
I've been watching BPD run through the generations of my family starting with my step-grandma to her daughter then her granddaughter, and her great-granddaughter who now has a young daughter. Yikes. I studied it in college and would volunteer to take their cases when I was a case manager. So glad to hear progress is being made to help folks with this difficult diagnosis.
This is an excellent episode! Nice one!
I've recently been diagnosed with BPD and this video was very interesting and out of the blue for me I've been watching sci show since I was a kid wow
Thank you so much for this video! During my early teen years I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and was very open about it! But certain things I read later on just didn’t add up. I was very recently, after 6 years diagnosed w BPD and am now trying to gather resources for my close ones to educate them. The part about trouble with self identity really hit home, I thought it was just something that couldn’t fit into a disorder. BPD is quite misunderstood
Great topic! We've got so many borderlines nowadays, people should be as informed as possible
I have BPD, but it took forever to diagnose me because they refuse to diagnose teens even though it is painfully obvious. Even now, I'm 19 and doctors are still very hesitant when I mention it to them and try to push it aside and diagnose me with something different. It's honestly frustrating, because I never got the help I needed for my disorder and now I don't have a way of doing so because of my change in insurance. I stuggle each day and it's had to have casual conversations sometimes without getting mad or frustrated almost instantly whenever some things are said. I hate going from happy and laughing to sad and screaming in less than 5 seconds, but there's nothing I can do.
As a rule they do not diagnose personality disorders in minors in part because many of the same behaviors are commonly the result of the immaturity and volatile emotions associated with puberty and the teen years in general, so they intentionally wait until a person is out of that naturally unstable growth period before labeling anyone with a personality disorder.
@@ethanpoole3443 Backfired for me lol
thank you for educating people on this topic; i meet the criteria (actually closed to schizoaffective disorder, which i think you should make a video on too) but because i'm still so young, i'm being denied a proper diagnosis... here in Finland, many youth (under 20) who need psychiatric attention get referrals to pediatric sections, where i feel like they don't take it as seriously because of the trope of teens still developing... i don't even have a "proper" therapist, she's actually more of a pediatry-oriented psychotherapist, helping manage with ADHD/ADD, ASD, et al and doesn't really provide DBT or similar... but i'm still pretty happy with her service, very supportive and positive person, i don't know where i'd be without her
Thank you for dispelling some of the myths surrounding BPD (or EUPD, as it is now known in Europe). People who have this condition need to know that it is treatable. There is a lot of stigma associated with those who have BPD. I've heard to many people say that it made me an inherently bad person and there is nothing I can do to change it. I tell you now; it took a lot of time, pain and hard work. But I got better. I learned to build my sense of identity and to control my emotions better. I now work for a mental health charity and get to help people who are struggling with their mental health conditions every day. And I can't say how much it means to me that I can say that. You are not a monster. You are not irreparably broken. You can get better. And you can live a fulfilling life. Stay safe and be kind to yourselves. You are not alone x
Thank you so much this is so important. I have BPD and I'm usually so afraid to tell people at times because they hear all the wrong things
I'd love to see more videos on Dissociative Identity Disorder! I've started learning about it recently through DissociaDID and I'd love to see more information about it.
Yes, but not DissociaDID
Thank you for talking about BPD in an open and positive way. I lived in a relationship, for several years, with someone who had BPD and I know they would be glad to see accurate and thoughtful information about BPD being shared.
Thank you for this video. My family member has bpd and knowing there is hope for them to have a happy healthy life gets me hope.thank you so much 🥰
I've been looking down the barrel of this diagnosis for over a decade. Thank you for helping me feel better about it
I've almost never been this early.
Always love your videos! Keep up the good work
Congrats! You were first!
As a person who was diagnosed with BPD (yes I went to multiple therapists and made sure I wasn't mistakenly diagnosed) I really appreciate this video, thanks a lot for educating on this important topic. No I haven't endured childhood trauma as far as I know, I trust my family on this. So me and my current therapist think it's genetic. I am currently going through CBT and getting better
Not the CBT you perverts think btw
I have BPD and DBT helped me so much. It’s such a weird disorder and I loved this video so much
So glad you did a video for bpd!!!!
I was diagnosed borderline personality disorder and all my life until the last few years I actually thought I was just being told I was on the border of having a personality disorder. How damned confusing right? So all these years through my marriage, having 3 kids, domestic violence, cancer, a stroke, and lots of other issues I still didn't know BPD was helping to cause problems in my life. I'm in therapy now but as soon as restrictions loosen and safety precautions are available to go to a new Dr, I plan to seek a psychotherapist to get help. Thanks for the facts!!
"BPD is highly heritable, meaning genetics strongly influence the likelihood a person develops the condition". Thats not necessarily true. Like any personality disorder, BPD can be very much influenced by upbringing and the relationship with one's parent - and because of that the parents personality plays a big role. Something can be hereditary without necessarily being inate or highly determined by genes - like being a doctor for example. There are many families of doctors and that can be explained by looking at upbringing more then by examining the familys genetics.
Gabriela, it can be both. Highly heritable is a true, evidence based conclusion. That is not to say it must be inherited, only that it is seen to be highly influenced by genetics.
@@zacklitherland2010 No it's not the evidence for a genetic link is virtually non existent.
If something is highly heritable, that generally means there is a high genetic factor. To disprove the genetic factor you would need something like a study showing BPD parents raising adoptive BPD children, or a comparison of kids with genetic lineage to the disease being raised by their birth parents VS raised by those not genetically related. I highly doubt that anything like this has been done on a scale large enough to draw statistical conclusions.
@@shawandrew I agree with everything you've written. Except the burden of proof is on those who wish to establish a genetic link. If there isn't one, then you can't prove a negative.
@@edmann1820 I don't think it requires proof. It's reasonable to assume it is genetic because most things that are hereditary are.
💜🥺 Hank THANK YOU for talking about BPD!
Very informative and delivered in a succinct and concise 7 minute video! Thank you!
I had two doctors disagree about me having BPD or Bipolar. Definitely had BPD and DBT therapy was a life saver.
The Concrete Confessional blog guy just dropped a hilarious article about his experiences with DBT and some other forms of therapy. Worth checking out, for sure.
This stuff is good to know! I've met a few people with BPD.
Thank you so much for uploading this video. It is helping me get through the pandemic!
Okay wow! Like seriously wow!! This is I think the first Scishow episode EVER (and I've watched your vids for years) in which I've seen Scishow make mention of the fact that there's more forms of therapy than just Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). The only previous episodes in which that was even hinted at were the episodes explicitly dedicated to Freudian and Jungian psychology that mentioned that both approaches still had practitioners. But any of the other approaches have never, to my knowledge, been mentioned as options for treating any condition. For anyone basing their understanding of the available psychological treatment options (besides meds) on Scishow, I wouldn't be surprised if they thought it's all just CBT (and maybe a bit of 'talk therapy', which afaik Scishow has never actually explained or defined). I know I've NEVER heard Scishow mention Dialectic Behavioral Therapy even in passing in all my years of watching this channel. So...maybe make an episode to disabuse all of us of this impression?...
I appreciate these episodes where a host breaks down fact and fiction of a an illness, disorder, etc. There are far too many myths spun by those who haven't done research and those who don't care to.
Thank you for this video. It means so much.
"Identity Disturbance" is a good name for a band.
it's true that not everyone who has bpd has experienced outright abuse or traumatic events but there's a lot of patterns that just don't get recognized by any authority as disruptive and therefore don't get noted even by patients themselves, but do have proven potential to cause psychological harm. A lot of psychologists have been more recently investigating potential connections between bpd and c-ptsd (complex-ptsd), rather than with outright ptsd, as c-ptsd has more to do with overall patterns of conditions rather than traumatic events. A person doesn't necessarily have to have been abused for their childhood to be unstable, their parents could have been unpredictable in what will get praise or criticism, and it's thought that this pattern, or rather lack of an understandable pattern to model one's reactions off of as a child, could be a necessary factor in developing the emotional dysreguation and impulse control issues that are the hallmarks of bpd, in addition to biological factors
I'm also really glad you didn't feed into the really demonizing myths about bpd. I've myself had some extremely good and extremely bad experiences with people who have bpd and at one point checked all the boxes myself (though once I left an abusive situation and was able to eventually mentally detach myself from the person most of the symptoms I observed went away enough that it's probably just run of the mill c-ptsd from my childhood reacting poorly to an intense and abusive situation in adulthood); they aren't a monolith. One or two people I've known with the diagnosis have been horrible to me but I've known others with it who have been my absolutely closest allies during my darkest times, and love so deeply, and I wouldn't trade knowing them for the world
An ex-friend of mine almost certainly had BPD. A psych had diagnosed her with bipolar and basically told her that she might instead/also have BPD but that they didn't WANT to diagnose her with it. Aparentally that's a pretty common problem and leads to a lot of misdiagnoses.
I read a lot of the time that’s because that diagnosis is a big red mark. A lot of therapists apparently won’t see someone with bpd