Many people live their entire lives without knowing who their true friends and allies are. Being smeared by a narcissist or group of narcissists is a very harsh lesson, but in the end we are cleansed. We know where we stand.
That’s true. People have their own reasons for setting boundaries with other people (which more-times aren’t anything to do with the other person, who’s more likely a saint/good friend) but with narcissists it does need to be taken a step further. You want to avoid being in the same room as them altogether because your very presence is an inspiration for gossip when all you’re trying to do is keep your head down and mind your own life (like they should). They might degrade you as antisocial and overly-sensitive but it’s better than having your name in the mouths of strangers halfway across town from someone who couldn’t stop gossiping if a genuine apology from their side depended on it. They just do the same thing over and over and over again so it’s better for you to just avoid any kind of contact or communication with them altogether. Try not to let the gossip-victim be you or give them anything to talk about,
HOW did he do it? A "friend " of mine for 16 year's, took his side, I saw a picture of her and him, having breakfast with his new supply. I've NEVER experienced this level of evilness in all my life, ever. If any one of my friends told me they were being abused? There is no question, I'd swoop them up and no contact their abuser. NO QUESTIONS ASKED! 🤯
My narcissistic siblings turned the attorney handling my father's estate (my Dad died last year) against me. I have been "no contact" with them, but I received an e-mail from my brother , basically outlining the "plan" that I needed to comply with. Of course, I had no say in the matter, but they needed my cooperation, since my father named me an equal beneficiary to the trust. I informed him that all contact would be handled through the attorney's office. That's when all hell broke loose. I could feel the smear campaign starting, as they went into panic mode to gain control of the situation and to control the narrative. A few days later, the attorney did an "about face" and bullied me into agreeing to go along with their wishes, and those of the trustee, although I was not legally obligated to do so. This resulted in my voluntarily giving up my right to my father's personal belongings, which included some memorabilia that was near and dear to my heart. I ruminated about how I could have let this happen, after all of the "training" I have received concerning narcissism. A lot of this was beyond my control, and I still haven't accepted what has happened. I have looked into hiring an attorney, but since I took a break from the situation for a few days, I am already doing so much better physically and emotionally. But I'm still grieving the fact that I have nothing tangible to remember him by.
Pastor's wife confronted me in the store ask about my sis if I talked with her I responded no. it was SHAME! ON U! I respected them. Now I know where I stand With them. 😥
Lost all my support of friends, family, & neighbors due to a smear campaign . I also was alienated from my two ADULT children. I found healing in writing my 5-book series “TRUE DECEIT FALSE LOVE.” Jess, thanks for all you do to bring awareness and information to help survivors! 💕🙏🏼😃📚📖✏️
I have also lost my children, the “friends” and my family has al already passed. I was a stay at home / my daughters and I were so close. They are shells of what they were - not only do they rape your soul, but your childrens as well :(
Oh man, Im so sorry.. 😔 One thing I know is that in time they show their true colours, your neighbours and the others will see what the persons about in due time. Narcissistic carma is HARD and God sees every one of their move. Theyre also very obsesses, the one i knew sat awoke for a week at a time high on drugs and just went after people online. Not just me but many others. One tried to commit suicide. Its demonic.
I had an underlying feeling not to trust my soon to be ex narc so I didn't introduce much of my private associates and close family members to him. My mom and him got along great because they're both narcissists so when I finally told him to leave my life, guess who he called. Yep, my mother. She loved listening to the drama but my closest family members, like my dad and my siblings and my children were not falling for it. They cut all contact with him and blocked him from all social media platforms. My point is listen to your instincts. Don't expose your closest support system to the narc. Better yet, don't expose yourself to them either.
Same! I never got to introduce him to my friends. Even when I could've, I was embarrassed to because deep down I knew I had no business dealing with him. When my sisters met him they found him amusing lol. I didn't understand why but now looking back, he was a whole clown trying to look good lol. He can't smear me to anyone that genuinely knows me.
Exact situation....!!! Some how I did not feel like introducing him to my extended family.. it was for protecting my relationship as I felt he is the best thing to happen to me and people will feel jealous and in our culture we believe that this type of emotions can effect our well-being and achievements...but later I realised had he known people in my family he would have gone door to door to to defame me.. exactly like u my mother likes to listen when someone gossips about me but my dad avoided it and non of my family members fell for it.
This is true. My mother gave me the silent treatment because I told her she hurt me. She attacked me for hurting her talked about me but never to me. Two of my aunts ignored simple texts I sent to thank them for sending 18th card to my dd. I've been cut out of the equation. I Don't exist in my family now. Except as a subject of gossip and slander
Susan what Jess said is true, we find out who is loyal and who needs the rest...it will pass and we will see who our real friends and loyal relatives are...meanwhile we are better off and can move along (wouldn't want to be them)...Yah bless...doug
Same here!! I’m be been exiled because I point out the dysfunctional abuse that goes on including abuse of my brothers dog but my sister in law who is a narcissist sociopath gets away with this evil and is able to control everyone against me! I’m isolated right now because of all the lies about me..
I don't know if they're doing a smear campaign but none of the friends have said a word to me in months since the break up happened. I had to just unfriend them all on socials
My husband has done this to me for 25 years. I am totally crazy now. I am suicidal and don't even know what is real anymore because of how he treats me.
You are NOT crazy your a kind human being.Hes the sick one not you.Try to know your better off now and that he will forever be the way he is he won't change but you can learn and live a wonderfully life.God bless and comfort you,I'm living proof he loves heals and will punish on your behalf.
How did I handle the smear campaign? I was suicidal, confused. Didn't know what was happening. Did an online search of her odd behaviour . Ended up here . Thank you Maureen for putting me through this crap. I no longer see you as a good Christian lady , but as a very hateful lonely person
This is why I have said bird's of the same feather flock together, don't waist your time worrying about them and their bs you'll really find out who's your real friends are 👍 Jess thanks for the video 🦋 and have a great weekend everyone.
I think it's my exes smear campaign that is causing his karma. I'd not met his friends often as he was from another country, but they were all so lovely. When he started to say the same things about me that he'd said about his other long term exes, they started to see a pattern and reached out to see how I was...i was myself (ie NOT psycho!) and thanked them for their concern...poss flying monkey or not, but many, including his best friend of 25 years have distanced themselves from him. I can imagine this happens to them often. Have a great weekend, Jess. 🤗❤️
how I handled the local smear campaign is, I blocked & deleted the narc & our mutual contacts (who treated me weirdly), I deleted all my social media & dating accounts & apps for 2 years, so I could not be stalked on social media nor could I witness any malicious gossip , following Police advice I had Verisure security installed in my property & dashcams in my vehicle, I recorded any gossiping or abusive neighbours on my iphone, I cut all neighbours off except one, it was complete lockdown / purge and the boundaries & barriers went up and I refused to make eye contact or chat with anyone in my narcissistic neighbourhood, I also kept a record of all micro aggressions and ignored all covert hoover attempts by the narc, I also informed him he has NPD, he said you’re not a doctor, I showed him my BSc Psych & said I’m giving you a year to look into & get help for your NPD, if I check on him in a years time & he’s still blameshifting & he hasn’t changed I’ll give him another year, that way I keep him hanging on a string not the other way round, that is how you reverse the tables on a narc, you make yourself invisible & unreachable & deaf to all flying monkeys & other Judases & Jezebels
Hi nice listening to your story. I have a daughter in law who is a narrisist. She has smeared me to the pastor at our church. She don't talk to me pastor thinks I need to be admitted. To a nut ward. But I am still good enough to play in her church I am a musician I play guitar and sing. So what I had to do is leave that church. Pastor and her husband believe her. Now I do take anxiety meds Have for 28 yrs. And my son or daughter in law do not talk to me or visit won't even let me see my grandson
Im finally who are my true friends especially after the my ex narc is smear campaign. Unfortunately nobody in my family and anyone connected to my family supports. Im grateful for the people who stood by me.
The person that I was talking to accidentally told on herself when she told me that she had an doctor's appointment. I asked her why she had to go to the doctor and she was hesitant to tell me that she had caught an infection. We weren't dating, just in the talking phase. But she was sleeping around with other people. That lead to an argument between us. And I called her out on that. She then told me that I wasn't her man and that she doesn't have to explain herself. She then went to her brother who was toxic as well, and told him that I was harassing her. He later contacted me and told me to leave her alone. She would love to play the victim even when she was in the one in the wrong. There smear campaign is the worst.
It’s true. Recently cut off a friend who can’t take personal responsibility and he has bad mouthed me to other mutual friends. Not only me, but other friends as well because we’re not bailing him out anymore. Victim mindset Narcissists do not age well at all and it’s a sad site to see.
they actually dont have to spread gossip,whatever they say is an inherent+implicit+explicit lie,its fascinating they have an audience that much consistent to their lies
Mine had a Facebook messenger group. In that group he added my adult children and he gossiped about me and launched a huge smear campaign against me. I had awoken from his games and his control. So I wasn’t easy to control anymore. His messenger group chat was a way to turn others against me and he played the victim and I didn’t have a voice. My middle son alerted me to what was going on and sent me screenshots. I was very hurt about what I had read. Thankfully he left 3 years ago but the damage he has done with my relationships with my children is non existent. I am still very distressed and traumatised to this day.
It’s been a long road but what you are saying is exactly right. I’ve had to walk away myself from a friendship that after years of doing things together discovered that I was the only person who really was in that relationship so it was time to end it for good and I don’t regret it. It doesn’t bother me to be alone and I will never rely on the narc for companionship. What has bothered me is there is an organization called Meetup where you can join groups that do different activities, well what ended up happening is the narcs long arm made sure to reach out and do the smear campaign in those in order to make sure I was ran out. I’m supposed to be a drug addicted and a thief and people be wear. What’s called Abuse by Proxy has been used against me. I’m also sure that when I use to go to this dog park in Carmichael California there were these people that only wanted who they wanted to use this public park and were discriminating against not only me but others as well. I was on antidepressants at the time so my behavior was taken that I was a druggie. I had other issues I was dealing with but it didn’t matter I was ran out as well and reported. My gut feelings told me something was not right. Anyway being a drug user or thief has never been proven, mainly because I’m not 😂
People in my community that I don’t know are smear campaigning my name. They are very far fetched, it used to hurt back then like 2 years ago, but the cops informed me not to talk to them and I did my best. It’s been a ugly rodeo being gang stalked by individuals who have histories of partying with the teenager crowd. I’m not a romantic match for them and with all the trash talk it doesn’t help. I’m a caring person and do care about the struggles in others lives, but they get criminals involved in trashing my whole family. I’m done being neighbors with this hood I’m in because the neighbors don’t seem to care about the people out there literally doing this. I offered my kindness and help; but it is no good. I can only hold my chin up and walk away from them all.
Fortunately, my time as a "supply line" was only 7ish months! It was a seven month period I'll never forget. I'll just say those seven months were the most educational 7 months in my entire life. :-) I love the line, " what the narcissists say to their friends, (AKA fly monkeys) is none of your business." Truth! Anyone that leaves me because of what the Devils, (AKA narcissist) even that might be too much credit in hindsight, says about me,, deserves to be removed from my life. It's that simple. The biggest mistake any one of us can make is give a narcissist, aka the devil, any of our energy in any shape or form. The best medicine for a devil, narcissist, is silence! Show them you are complete, and Powerful without their negativity! I have less than zero empathy for a narcissist. The only thing in narcissist deserves, is the emotional pain, emotional trauma and all the suffering they unleash on their victims. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't piss on a narcissist if they were burning in hell, except to prolong their suffering. We don't have to take any action toward them. They self-destruct easily on their own. That's one thing that a narcissist, a devil, cannot outrun or escape. Cheers to all the survivors out there!
Hi Jess, having been smeared and my personality and me vandalized by a ruthless narcissist I'm soooo looking forward to this today! Thanks for being here and always sharing your experience and wisdom with us....BTW, happy Friday! 🍁
@@tarakonjolka5140 I've been there... The thing is that you can get out of that hell. It takes time and a lot of energy. Do not give up. 🙏Many of us have been where you are right now. Take good care of yourself. You are not alone. All Love to you! ❤️❤️❤️
+Jess Stanley Praise the LORD amen, Jess Stanley. i heard it said something like this: when an empathic person bad-mouths a narcissist, he/she is telling the truth. when a narcissist bad-mouths anybody, it's a smear campaign. God bless. Agape love
Yep when there words a line with the devils words my concern is u won't be happy no matter where u go. Shame on u. U have no right. If they listen to the enemy they will speak for him. We need identify Toxic words and where they from
Interesting! Wow. My ex's current girlfriend tried to badmouth my boyfriend after I exposed my ex and told her who he truly is. She said "Well maybe my guy uses people and nobody knows about it, but YOURS uses people and everybody knows about it." I was confused as heck. Did she really just admit that her boyfriend is worse? I don't know.
I don't worry about the gossip against me, it only serves to expose who is a gossip by listening and who is not my friend and who is my friend. I am perfectly fine being rejected by mean people. Since I am not co-dependent to anyone but Jesus Christ, I have no need to keep wicked people in my life. I am always pleased when narcissists isolate me. I don't let the narcissists know who my friends are or introduce them to my friends. When narcissists gossip against you count it all joy that they are exposing who your friends are and who loves you or not. Those who believe the narcissist are themselves gossip mongers, not the kind of people we want anything to do with. When we know the truth and Christ in us knows the truth we have nothing to fear. And, there will be justice in the end of this life.
I had a narc friend and his flying monkeys who ran a smear campaign on me after I walked away from their toxicity. They hoovered me in public and I called them out for their weirdness in being so obsessed over another grown man (they were straight males). They don't even obsess over attractive women like they do me. I could have made an OnlyFans account airing my personal business and these mofos certainly would have subscribed!
I probably k*lled one 🤔 He started badmouthing me and destroyed 2 important relationships within my own family. So I remembered the abysmal relationship he had had with his parents (who were no longer with us at that point): Essentially, he kept whining about being an accident (i.e. not a planned child), having to help his granny with chores, while his siblings got to go to the mall, his mom never being there for him (because they were poor, she had 5 kids and worked as a waitress) and his dad getting frustrated with his attitude and telling him that he would probably end up in prison, if he continued like this, ONE time. His mom was a piece of work, I have to admit. She was not the brightest, but (towards me) a sweet person, who loved to bake cakes. Very hard-working, but incredibly whiny and very comfortable in her constant victim role. Unhappy in her marriage - she had gotten pregnant at a young age and her boyfriend at that time had immediately taken responsibility and married her... but it turned out they weren't a good fit and he stayed away from home as much as possible, while still sending her the majority of his income. He was a well-educated guy from a decent family, who really tried to do the right thing, but his new wife's mom and brothers ab*sed him badly, when he was at home - and she was just fine with that! Although he had married her, they resented him for getting her pregnant in the first place... and they were definitely not a good family. Hoodr*ts, if anything. Still he stayed with his wife until the end, even after the kids had all moved out and he could have gotten a divorce. As far as I know, he didn't even cheat on her once. The narc's dad and I had a few things in common: We both went on extended work trips in very similar jobs, had some social skills and were interested in classical music, literature and things like mysterious disappearances etc. We became friends, although the narc did everything to present his parents in the worst light possible. When he had one of his episodes, he would frequently claim, that I was somehow colluding with his dad to make him miserable - specifically when I defended his dad. According to the narc, his dad was a really bad ab*ser, who t*rrorised them all, all day... but I had seen proof, that the dad had only been at home once a month for a weekend during the time, when the narc lived with his parents. Stories about being locked up in the shed for a week, only being let out to be beaten with a belt, were obviously made up. His dad didn't even spend a whole week with them when it was Christmas, for about 23 years. He was at home 12 times a year, usually for 2 days, or 3 days during Christmas time, and would spend New Year's Eve with his company. It's true that he loathed the narc, but he wasn't exactly close with his other children either, as his wife's family had turned them against him. So, what did I do, when the narc and his flying monkeys targetted my family? I lied to him. I pretended not to know what had caused those sudden problems... and that I was feeling really guilty, because I had never told him, that he had been right all along. Secretly being right about something did of course spark his interest. I confessed, that I HAD colluded with his parents, that they never loved him and had told me I should leave him as soon as possible, because he was simply unloveable as a person. I went into close detail (thanks to his parents I had enough information about his shenanigans) and must have been super convincing, playing the concerned, guilt-ridden sinner. I could see the shock in his eyes. A couple of days later he got drunk and crashed into a tree with his car, ending himself. Could be a coincidence... but this is exactly what he had been threatening to do for years. Whenever I put a toe out of line, he would say he'd get drunk and hit a tree and leave me behind without money. I like to think, that I hurt him so badly with confirming his deepest fears, that this was the result. And, no, I don't feel bad, and my finances are ok.
Respond to absolutely nothing...Silence pisses them off when you don't defend anything...
Many people live their entire lives without knowing who their true friends and allies are. Being smeared by a narcissist or group of narcissists is a very harsh lesson, but in the end we are cleansed. We know where we stand.
Yes we do
I know most mine aren't 1 I believe is.
That’s true. People have their own reasons for setting boundaries with other people (which more-times aren’t anything to do with the other person, who’s more likely a saint/good friend) but with narcissists it does need to be taken a step further. You want to avoid being in the same room as them altogether because your very presence is an inspiration for gossip when all you’re trying to do is keep your head down and mind your own life (like they should). They might degrade you as antisocial and overly-sensitive but it’s better than having your name in the mouths of strangers halfway across town from someone who couldn’t stop gossiping if a genuine apology from their side depended on it. They just do the same thing over and over and over again so it’s better for you to just avoid any kind of contact or communication with them altogether. Try not to let the gossip-victim be you or give them anything to talk about,
HOW did he do it? A "friend " of mine for 16 year's, took his side, I saw a picture of her and him, having breakfast with his new supply. I've NEVER experienced this level of evilness in all my life, ever. If any one of my friends told me they were being abused? There is no question, I'd swoop them up and no contact their abuser. NO QUESTIONS ASKED! 🤯
I lost a lot of people… but I am better alone than surrounded by fake people!
My narcissistic siblings turned the attorney handling my father's estate (my Dad died last year) against me. I have been "no contact" with them, but I received an e-mail from my brother , basically outlining the "plan" that I needed to comply with. Of course, I had no say in the matter, but they needed my cooperation, since my father named me an equal beneficiary to the trust. I informed him that all contact would be handled through the attorney's office. That's when all hell broke loose. I could feel the smear campaign starting, as they went into panic mode to gain control of the situation and to control the narrative. A few days later, the attorney did an "about face" and bullied me into agreeing to go along with their wishes, and those of the trustee, although I was not legally obligated to do so. This resulted in my voluntarily giving up my right to my father's personal belongings, which included some memorabilia that was near and dear to my heart. I ruminated about how I could have let this happen, after all of the "training" I have received concerning narcissism. A lot of this was beyond my control, and I still haven't accepted what has happened. I have looked into hiring an attorney, but since I took a break from the situation for a few days, I am already doing so much better physically and emotionally. But I'm still grieving the fact that I have nothing tangible to remember him by.
Pastor's wife confronted me in the store ask about my sis if I talked with her I responded no. it was SHAME! ON U! I respected them. Now I know where I stand With them. 😥
Lost all my support of friends, family, & neighbors due to a smear campaign . I also was alienated from my two ADULT children. I found healing in writing my 5-book series “TRUE DECEIT FALSE LOVE.” Jess, thanks for all you do to bring awareness and information to help survivors! 💕🙏🏼😃📚📖✏️
I have also lost my children, the “friends” and my family has al already passed.
I was a stay at home / my daughters and I were so close. They are shells of what they were - not only do they rape your soul, but your childrens as well :(
Oh man, Im so sorry.. 😔 One thing I know is that in time they show their true colours, your neighbours and the others will see what the persons about in due time. Narcissistic carma is HARD and God sees every one of their move. Theyre also very obsesses, the one i knew sat awoke for a week at a time high on drugs and just went after people online. Not just me but many others. One tried to commit suicide. Its demonic.
It's as though my life stopped when I move to State sis in.
SORRY this happening to u & so many 😥
Doc did your children reach out to you?
I had an underlying feeling not to trust my soon to be ex narc so I didn't introduce much of my private associates and close family members to him. My mom and him got along great because they're both narcissists so when I finally told him to leave my life, guess who he called. Yep, my mother. She loved listening to the drama but my closest family members, like my dad and my siblings and my children were not falling for it. They cut all contact with him and blocked him from all social media platforms. My point is listen to your instincts. Don't expose your closest support system to the narc. Better yet, don't expose yourself to them either.
Same! I never got to introduce him to my friends. Even when I could've, I was embarrassed to because deep down I knew I had no business dealing with him. When my sisters met him they found him amusing lol. I didn't understand why but now looking back, he was a whole clown trying to look good lol. He can't smear me to anyone that genuinely knows me.
My daughter met the ex narc once and immediately thought she was fake… kid has better intuition than I had .. took me a few months to figure it out
Exact situation....!!! Some how I did not feel like introducing him to my extended family.. it was for protecting my relationship as I felt he is the best thing to happen to me and people will feel jealous and in our culture we believe that this type of emotions can effect our well-being and achievements...but later I realised had he known people in my family he would have gone door to door to to defame me.. exactly like u my mother likes to listen when someone gossips about me but my dad avoided it and non of my family members fell for it.
This is true. My mother gave me the silent treatment because I told her she hurt me. She attacked me for hurting her talked about me but never to me. Two of my aunts ignored simple texts I sent to thank them for sending 18th card to my dd. I've been cut out of the equation. I Don't exist in my family now. Except as a subject of gossip and slander
Susan what Jess said is true, we find out who is loyal and who needs the rest...it will pass and we will see who our real friends and loyal relatives are...meanwhile we are better off and can move along (wouldn't want to be them)...Yah bless...doug
Same here!! I’m be been exiled because I point out the dysfunctional abuse that goes on including abuse of my brothers dog but my sister in law who is a narcissist sociopath gets away with this evil and is able to control everyone against me! I’m isolated right now because of all the lies about me..
I don't know if they're doing a smear campaign but none of the friends have said a word to me in months since the break up happened. I had to just unfriend them all on socials
My husband has done this to me for 25 years. I am totally crazy now. I am suicidal and don't even know what is real anymore because of how he treats me.
I understand. Keep listening to Jess. Any little thing you can do for yourself, do it. Your life IS valuable. Never give the prick the satisfaction.
Please seek help there’s always a way out my friend
Leave him love 😘🌹 you Are loved ❤️
You are NOT crazy your a kind human being.Hes the sick one not you.Try to know your better off now and that he will forever be the way he is he won't change but you can learn and live a wonderfully life.God bless and comfort you,I'm living proof he loves heals and will punish on your behalf.
How did I handle the smear campaign? I was suicidal, confused. Didn't know what was happening. Did an online search of her odd behaviour . Ended up here . Thank you Maureen for putting me through this crap. I no longer see you as a good Christian lady , but as a very hateful lonely person
Hello Ian sorry this lady put you through crap .me to .been there. We way better than these weirdos
This is why I have said bird's of the same feather flock together, don't waist your time worrying about them and their bs you'll really find out who's your real friends are 👍 Jess thanks for the video 🦋 and have a great weekend everyone.
this is happening to me at work 😥😥😥
I think it's my exes smear campaign that is causing his karma. I'd not met his friends often as he was from another country, but they were all so lovely. When he started to say the same things about me that he'd said about his other long term exes, they started to see a pattern and reached out to see how I was...i was myself (ie NOT psycho!) and thanked them for their concern...poss flying monkey or not, but many, including his best friend of 25 years have distanced themselves from him. I can imagine this happens to them often.
Have a great weekend, Jess. 🤗❤️
how I handled the local smear campaign is, I blocked & deleted the narc & our mutual contacts (who treated me weirdly), I deleted all my social media & dating accounts & apps for 2 years, so I could not be stalked on social media nor could I witness any malicious gossip , following Police advice I had Verisure security installed in my property & dashcams in my vehicle, I recorded any gossiping or abusive neighbours on my iphone, I cut all neighbours off except one, it was complete lockdown / purge and the boundaries & barriers went up and I refused to make eye contact or chat with anyone in my narcissistic neighbourhood, I also kept a record of all micro aggressions and ignored all covert hoover attempts by the narc, I also informed him he has NPD, he said you’re not a doctor, I showed him my BSc Psych & said I’m giving you a year to look into & get help for your NPD, if I check on him in a years time & he’s still blameshifting & he hasn’t changed I’ll give him another year, that way I keep him hanging on a string not the other way round, that is how you reverse the tables on a narc, you make yourself invisible & unreachable & deaf to all flying monkeys & other Judases & Jezebels
Hi nice listening to your story. I have a daughter in law who is a narrisist. She has smeared me to the pastor at our church. She don't talk to me pastor thinks I need to be admitted. To a nut ward. But I am still good enough to play in her church I am a musician I play guitar and sing. So what I had to do is leave that church. Pastor and her husband believe her. Now I do take anxiety meds
Have for 28 yrs. And my son or daughter in law do not talk to me or visit won't even let me see my grandson
I‘m sorry for what you are going trough.:Probably once upon a time, you can give her , her own medicin
Dear Wayne, hold on to your faith. The Holy Spirit has your back. God bless you!
Im finally who are my true friends especially after the my ex narc is smear campaign. Unfortunately nobody in my family and anyone connected to my family supports. Im grateful for the people who stood by me.
The person that I was talking to accidentally told on herself when she told me that she had an doctor's appointment. I asked her why she had to go to the doctor and she was hesitant to tell me that she had caught an infection. We weren't dating, just in the talking phase. But she was sleeping around with other people. That lead to an argument between us. And I called her out on that. She then told me that I wasn't her man and that she doesn't have to explain herself. She then went to her brother who was toxic as well, and told him that I was harassing her. He later contacted me and told me to leave her alone. She would love to play the victim even when she was in the one in the wrong. There smear campaign is the worst.
It’s true. Recently cut off a friend who can’t take personal responsibility and he has bad mouthed me to other mutual friends. Not only me, but other friends as well because we’re not bailing him out anymore. Victim mindset Narcissists do not age well at all and it’s a sad site to see.
they actually dont have to spread gossip,whatever they say is an inherent+implicit+explicit lie,its fascinating they have an audience that much consistent to their lies
Mine had a Facebook messenger group. In that group he added my adult children and he gossiped about me and launched a huge smear campaign against me. I had awoken from his games and his control. So I wasn’t easy to control anymore. His messenger group chat was a way to turn others against me and he played the victim and I didn’t have a voice. My middle son alerted me to what was going on and sent me screenshots. I was very hurt about what I had read. Thankfully he left 3 years ago but the damage he has done with my relationships with my children is non existent. I am still very distressed and traumatised to this day.
It’s been a long road but what you are saying is exactly right. I’ve had to walk away myself from a friendship that after years of doing things together discovered that I was the only person who really was in that relationship so it was time to end it for good and I don’t regret it. It doesn’t bother me to be alone and I will never rely on the narc for companionship. What has bothered me is there is an organization called Meetup where you can join groups that do different activities, well what ended up happening is the narcs long arm made sure to reach out and do the smear campaign in those in order to make sure I was ran out. I’m supposed to be a drug addicted and a thief and people be wear. What’s called Abuse by Proxy has been used against me. I’m also sure that when I use to go to this dog park in Carmichael California there were these people that only wanted who they wanted to use this public park and were discriminating against not only me but others as well. I was on antidepressants at the time so my behavior was taken that I was a druggie. I had other issues I was dealing with but it didn’t matter I was ran out as well and reported. My gut feelings told me something was not right. Anyway being a drug user or thief has never been proven, mainly because I’m not 😂
People in my community that I don’t know are smear campaigning my name. They are very far fetched, it used to hurt back then like 2 years ago, but the cops informed me not to talk to them and I did my best. It’s been a ugly rodeo being gang stalked by individuals who have histories of partying with the teenager crowd. I’m not a romantic match for them and with all the trash talk it doesn’t help. I’m a caring person and do care about the struggles in others lives, but they get criminals involved in trashing my whole family. I’m done being neighbors with this hood I’m in because the neighbors don’t seem to care about the people out there literally doing this. I offered my kindness and help; but it is no good. I can only hold my chin up and walk away from them all.
Fortunately, my time as a "supply line" was only 7ish months! It was a seven month period I'll never forget. I'll just say those seven months were the most educational 7 months in my entire life. :-) I love the line, " what the narcissists say to their friends, (AKA fly monkeys) is none of your business." Truth! Anyone that leaves me because of what the Devils, (AKA narcissist) even that might be too much credit in hindsight, says about me,, deserves to be removed from my life. It's that simple. The biggest mistake any one of us can make is give a narcissist, aka the devil, any of our energy in any shape or form. The best medicine for a devil, narcissist, is silence! Show them you are complete, and Powerful without their negativity! I have less than zero empathy for a narcissist. The only thing in narcissist deserves, is the emotional pain, emotional trauma and all the suffering they unleash on their victims. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't piss on a narcissist if they were burning in hell, except to prolong their suffering. We don't have to take any action toward them. They self-destruct easily on their own. That's one thing that a narcissist, a devil, cannot outrun or escape. Cheers to all the survivors out there!
I love your direct , open way of explaining what we are experiencing.
Hi Jess, having been smeared and my personality and me vandalized by a ruthless narcissist I'm soooo looking forward to this today! Thanks for being here and always sharing your experience and wisdom with us....BTW, happy Friday! 🍁
Me too. Thanks Yess
Happy Friday Peter! I hope you come hang out tonight!
I have been married to a narcissist for 25 years now and he's finally driven me crazy. I am totally suicidal at this point.
@@JessStanley Definitely!!! See you!
@@tarakonjolka5140 I've been there... The thing is that you can get out of that hell. It takes time and a lot of energy. Do not give up. 🙏Many of us have been where you are right now. Take good care of yourself. You are not alone. All Love to you! ❤️❤️❤️
+Jess Stanley Praise the LORD amen, Jess Stanley. i heard it said something like this: when an empathic person bad-mouths a narcissist, he/she is telling the truth. when a narcissist bad-mouths anybody, it's a smear campaign. God bless. Agape love
My ex narc was a gossip about everyone she knew (supply) before I left her .. I’m sure I’m on the hit list … 😂
Yep when there words a line with the devils words my concern is u won't be happy no matter where u go. Shame on u. U have no right. If they listen to the enemy they will speak for him. We need identify Toxic words and where they from
Interesting! Wow. My ex's current girlfriend tried to badmouth my boyfriend after I exposed my ex and told her who he truly is. She said "Well maybe my guy uses people and nobody knows about it, but YOURS uses people and everybody knows about it." I was confused as heck. Did she really just admit that her boyfriend is worse? I don't know.
JESS good one ,Thanks....i have come to the same conclusions...Creator bless...doug
I don't worry about the gossip against me, it only serves to expose who is a gossip by listening and who is not my friend and who is my friend. I am perfectly fine being rejected by mean people. Since I am not co-dependent to anyone but Jesus Christ, I have no need to keep wicked people in my life. I am always pleased when narcissists isolate me. I don't let the narcissists know who my friends are or introduce them to my friends.
When narcissists gossip against you count it all joy that they are exposing who your friends are and who loves you or not. Those who believe the narcissist are themselves gossip mongers, not the kind of people we want anything to do with.
When we know the truth and Christ in us knows the truth we have nothing to fear. And, there will be justice in the end of this life.
Thank you blessings
Jess, your a Rockstar and we love you, thank you and keep that info comin ....
I had a narc friend and his flying monkeys who ran a smear campaign on me after I walked away from their toxicity. They hoovered me in public and I called them out for their weirdness in being so obsessed over another grown man (they were straight males). They don't even obsess over attractive women like they do me. I could have made an OnlyFans account airing my personal business and these mofos certainly would have subscribed!
Awesome video! ❤️
They are the Devil's Advocate
✨👌🏻
Bottom feeders
I probably k*lled one 🤔
He started badmouthing me and destroyed 2 important relationships within my own family.
So I remembered the abysmal relationship he had had with his parents (who were no longer with us at that point):
Essentially, he kept whining about being an accident (i.e. not a planned child), having to help his granny with chores, while his siblings got to go to the mall, his mom never being there for him (because they were poor, she had 5 kids and worked as a waitress) and his dad getting frustrated with his attitude and telling him that he would probably end up in prison, if he continued like this, ONE time.
His mom was a piece of work, I have to admit. She was not the brightest, but (towards me) a sweet person, who loved to bake cakes. Very hard-working, but incredibly whiny and very comfortable in her constant victim role. Unhappy in her marriage - she had gotten pregnant at a young age and her boyfriend at that time had immediately taken responsibility and married her... but it turned out they weren't a good fit and he stayed away from home as much as possible, while still sending her the majority of his income.
He was a well-educated guy from a decent family, who really tried to do the right thing, but his new wife's mom and brothers ab*sed him badly, when he was at home - and she was just fine with that! Although he had married her, they resented him for getting her pregnant in the first place... and they were definitely not a good family. Hoodr*ts, if anything. Still he stayed with his wife until the end, even after the kids had all moved out and he could have gotten a divorce. As far as I know, he didn't even cheat on her once.
The narc's dad and I had a few things in common: We both went on extended work trips in very similar jobs, had some social skills and were interested in classical music, literature and things like mysterious disappearances etc. We became friends, although the narc did everything to present his parents in the worst light possible.
When he had one of his episodes, he would frequently claim, that I was somehow colluding with his dad to make him miserable - specifically when I defended his dad. According to the narc, his dad was a really bad ab*ser, who t*rrorised them all, all day... but I had seen proof, that the dad had only been at home once a month for a weekend during the time, when the narc lived with his parents. Stories about being locked up in the shed for a week, only being let out to be beaten with a belt, were obviously made up. His dad didn't even spend a whole week with them when it was Christmas, for about 23 years. He was at home 12 times a year, usually for 2 days, or 3 days during Christmas time, and would spend New Year's Eve with his company. It's true that he loathed the narc, but he wasn't exactly close with his other children either, as his wife's family had turned them against him.
So, what did I do, when the narc and his flying monkeys targetted my family?
I lied to him.
I pretended not to know what had caused those sudden problems... and that I was feeling really guilty, because I had never told him, that he had been right all along. Secretly being right about something did of course spark his interest.
I confessed, that I HAD colluded with his parents, that they never loved him and had told me I should leave him as soon as possible, because he was simply unloveable as a person. I went into close detail (thanks to his parents I had enough information about his shenanigans) and must have been super convincing, playing the concerned, guilt-ridden sinner. I could see the shock in his eyes.
A couple of days later he got drunk and crashed into a tree with his car, ending himself. Could be a coincidence... but this is exactly what he had been threatening to do for years. Whenever I put a toe out of line, he would say he'd get drunk and hit a tree and leave me behind without money. I like to think, that I hurt him so badly with confirming his deepest fears, that this was the result.
And, no, I don't feel bad, and my finances are ok.
Jess J bear Stanley
💪🙂