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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ก.ย. 2024
- Coparenting with a #narcissist. Parallel parenting and setting boundaries could save you time and energy
Welcome to The #Narcissists' Code. If this is your first video, my name is Lee and I am a self aware narcissist. I've been in therapy for my personality disorder since 2017 and it has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything.
The point of these videos is to help bring awareness from the other side of the #narcissistic *buse spectrum. All my videos give perspective on why many narcissists do what they do and the possible different reasons behind them. The abuse victims get validation and the #Narcissists (those that are willing) get to see that you can get help and that you are not alone.
1 on 1's and all my links - beacons.page/m...
You can find me on -
Tiktok MentalHealness - www.tiktok.com...
Insta- Mentalhealnesss - www.instagram....
Facebook - / mentalhealness85
For more detailed videos find me on www.wisio.com search mental healness. Click the BEACON up top for direct links. Thank you
“Coparenting” with a narcissist has been the worst experience of my life. Honestly. It’s so hard not being able to escape this person.
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It is, it's really hard at first. They won't change so you have to. You have to learn to not let them trigger you. Always put your childs feelings first, regardless of what the other parent is doing, never say negative things about the other parent to your child. Sometimes using a third person to do handovers can help. Its best if you have as little contact with them as possible. Try and get professional help. Sometimes you can access free family advice. Getting a letter drawn up with an agreement of childcare arrangements can help. If there is domestic violence history then you really should go no contact and get some legal advice. Its so damaging to children, the only thing i regret is that i didnt go no contact earlier. I left him but it took years to actually stop him interfering, stalking and abusing me. I went no contact and had years at court but it was worth it as i'm free. He can't argue with a court order and he's not allowed to come to my home. I'm no longer a supply and he has no influence on my life...he still tries sometimes, birthdays and christmas lol but i don't bite. I hope you find your strength.
Same. They have kids with us to trap you with them and have at least an amount of control for the rest of your life. They will blatantly disregard the safety and well being of the children yet tell you that you are a bad parent for establishing boundaries to protect your kids. They ditch the kids constantly unless its to inconvenience you and then smear you on social media telling lies about you “keeping the kids from them”. Its hellish. People like this should be accountable by law but the law just enables their abuse and control
Yasss..
It can be done.
I know.have faith.
@@CBrown86 your comment is so ironic because he liwent to the police department today and told them that he was fearful of our child’s safety. Luckily he has a reputation and nothing came of it but my anxiety is through the roof. He has chosen not to see her for months and literally popped up out of nowhere demanding to see her. I gave him a time to come which of course didn’t work for him so now he’s accusing me of keeping her away from him...again.
Ive been coparenting with my abusive narcissist for 12 years. Its a nightmare. I wish he'd be that dad who just disappears. I wouldn't even ask for child support, I just want him to leave my daughter and I alone. He destroys her self confidence when she with him, and I have to build her back up when she's with me.
I’m sorry! That’s horrible
@@kimberlyconner1439 it’s been 9 years here for me and it is awful. A couple of my kids are becoming adults and it seems to be getting a little better for them now but I still have 2 at home and anytime they spend with their Dad mentally exhausts them for days. I wish they had somewhere they could go detox their brains before coming back home
@@kimberlyconner1439 Take heart
Coparenting with a narc sucks. You do all the work and get 1/4 the recognition.
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So true that's why we have to set boundaries stay strong don't react deal with them as less as possible and don't say anything bad about him to your kids if you can so you don't look like the bad one cuz they're still going to try to make you look like the bad one regardless but kids are smart they'll figure it out one day it is a horrible experience though I'm going through it right now too been going through it for 20 years 🙄
Yeah :/ really sucks.
yeah it does. I’m dealing with the changing parenting plan every few months from her
More like 0 percent.
Laughed out loud when you said, "He gone text you at 2am asking how the baby doing knowing damn well that baby sleep." That's my ex.
Yes Heavy on the 6am &7pm texts call asking about his baby
Me too 😂
That's why ringers have mute buttons
my ex too, been doing it since my first trimester.
Mine too omg 😂😂😂😂😂
Parallel Parenting only works if they're not abusing the child.
I agree, that's my concern.. I commented above that I think therapy and parenting classes should be required.
This, because they will at least try to emotionally abuse them
I’m not seeing my kid no where to be abuse
@@tonibanks5458 good luck. The courts constantly betray the healthy parent
This is my situation right now. I been dealing with the father of my son for 7 years. I’m so exhausted. Worst experience of my life.
How are you holding up now my son is three and this situation has been so traumatizing for me I’m over it
It amazes me that after going through so much with him I started doing a lot of these things without even knowing the names of them. Like this parallel parenting. And I know it boils his blood when I stop him in his tracks with “ hey is this about our son”. 🤣 nothing but GOD brought me through this. And I only did 4long hard years in the vicinity with him.
Its a power thing. Time is a form of control. My entire marriage revolved around my ex’s schedule. Our entire family had to move heaven and earth to fit his schedule but it was never reciprocated. My schedule was irrelevant. It took me 2 decades to figure that out. So now - we are not chained to his schedule. Freedom
Same. Going no contact at this point.
Is he the leader or are you ?
How did you escape the control over your schedule? I've been "coparenting" for 13 years, and it's always revolved around his needs and wants. Fast forward to now, he refuses to communicate with me. I've asked him to tell me his summer holiday dates with our son, and he refuses. We never did the courts, I was too afraid of him (I still am). I'm tired of him holding me hostage. I need strategies and a plan...
@@KP-hx5jogo to the courts. I am not sure if you have a formal divorce or are just separated. But in that case he knows how he can control and manipulate you. Seek help and advice. Search online and start learning how to put boundaries. These abusive people tend to make others believe that are boundaries are unreasonable. You need people who can show you the reality and help you get out of his control so you can start advocating for yourself and figuring out what you can control and change. Time to learn how to heal
That’s a great suggestion:
In response to “Mommy says” questions, it’s awesome to ask “well, what do you think?” Not only does it open a dialogue, but it allows your child to express themselves and feel understood. Narcissists have a very difficult time allowing kids to have their own thoughts and opinions. It’s crucial that the other parent provides opportunities for it.
A step further: no matter how they answer- ask why they think that. Keep asking questions instead of telling them how they think or feel. It will help you understand, guide, and support your child’s method of critical thinking.
This is amazing advice
I love this!!! Thanks for sharing
Thank you I love this ❤️
I think also teaches the critical thinking skills. You're teaching them HOW to think instead of WHAT to think and that will protect them from manipulators.
Brilliant tip!
That’s what I’m dealing with. Cutting access off from me and only focusing in on the kids. They hate boundaries.
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Parallel parenting does work at keeping the peace, but it takes a lot of humility. You have to really pick your battles and remind yourself it is for the kids and not for you or the other parent. The kids deserve peace. They didn't choose their parents. It is only a short time you have with your kids. Don't spend it fighting about nonsense that won't matter 20 years from now.
I love how you are self aware! I am a therapist. Also keep in mind that sometimes you care a lot about being “judged”. Keep working on your mental health too because I can see the narcissism tendencies trying to peak back, such as the need to not be judged. Narcs are very insecure. No need to focus on who will judge you, you’re doing a great job and are still a work in progress!
I've been divorced from my boy's father since 2013...he continues to terrorize the children and me through the broken family court system. I consider the judge his biggest enabler!
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The enablers are the worst. They see something is wrong and do nothing. Absolutely nothing. Narcissism will never go away. It will only get worse because there will be more and more enablers allowing it, making the narcissists getting away with everything. And as I learned in school "Actions that lead to a positive outcome will be continued". As long as the court system is in denial about how dysfunctional it is, and the enablers keep their mouth shut, the longer the narcissists will keep doing what they do.
My poor children 😞
I am so sorry
Right there with you now. Been in court for 7 years because of this.
Omg. All. Of. This.
My daughter's dad would change the schedule based on his new girlfriends schedule and just skip visitation for 3 weeks at a time...then when he got her not he would not bring her home on Sunday night on time...and when I would call to tell him to bring her home he would call the police on ME for "harassing him."
Literally just dealt with something so similar started making up lies or would over exaggerate the truth to get out of taking my son on his weekends to spend time with the new girlfriend then after agreeing to bring my son by for my daughters birthday party (daughter from a previous relationship) he ghosted me the day of and took my son to the beach with his new gf instead after talking to him about this and saying the lying was unacceptable he tried to turn it around on me and say I knew
I’m a world that breeds narcissists it is wonderful that you are showing vulnerability to bring awareness to us, who all have narcissist tendencies at some point. None of us are perfect.
Hey dude, props for acknowledging a personal issue. It's a measure of a man to admit when he's wrong. You can't fix anything without first knowing something is wrong
Nothing to be nervous about, we appreciate the information. Knowledge is POWER!!! Your platform is helping millions, the proof is in the pudding 😌
As a therapist in training I really commend this video and the work you've obviously done. Thank you for sharing with us
My daughter has epilepsy and has seizures in her sleep and my ex uses a large variety of drugs. The last 9 years he has never been able to wake up on his own or with the help of an alarm clock. He slept past noon the entire time we were together and I know for a fact he would not wake up if she had a seizure. His new favorite threat is taking me to court to force her to stay with him overnight. If my daughter had a seizure while he was asleep she could die and he has no self awareness or care about her safety at all. I wish he would get sucked into a black hole and disappear
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Girl I feel you on the black hole part man so sorry you're going through that I've been going through horrible treatment off and on for 20 years from him and it sucks cuz for a while I was far away and I moved closer so the kids could spend more time and that was a huge mistake cuz at the moment I am stuck here and he messes with my mind whenever he can but I'm learning stronger boundaries and not to react it is just crazy how they are so entitled and dysfunctional and cannot take responsibility for any of their behavior it's truly disgusting at this point I could care less I don't even want any acknowledgment from him period sounds horrible what you're going through too I pray for strength for you and your daughter too blessings and one love
I’m so sorry. My 16 yo has epilepsy. That has to be frightening and so fckg maddening. Some of them literally do not care. About anything but themselves.
Divine feminine are so strong. They are the promess of morals & values for our generations☀️
Keep records of everything. Provisions can be written in for health issues. If he had prescriptions for meds, keep track of what and how much. If it's illegal, you can have him tested (hair is the best way) and he'll lose because of that.
My daughter's dad is very unhappy and he has a beautiful successful wife but he is very unhappy. I've moved on and so glad God delivered me.
I wish so badly my daughter’s father would go to therapy and get the help he needs. Taking responsibility and also advocating for healing and awareness is such a mature stance to take. Thank you for your information
I personally watch you because my children’s mother is a narcissist (non diagnosed). And this has helped me to parallel parent, ignore the disrespect from her and still be able to give respect to her. I feel the only thing I battle with is wondering will it ever stop, and will she ever learn to properly co parent without the constant disrespect or continuous lies.
As an active father of two daughters I share with a narcissist, ages 15 and 11, the only advice I’d give to my younger self is DISAPPEAR. Both me and my children go through nonstop headache and headache and it’s just not worth it. I have my children 50% of the time and they both literally hate me from the brainwashing over the years. There’s nothing but a trail of destruction in our lives. If you find yourself in this situation just disappear.
Sorry to hear I’m going threw the same but I don’t get to see my twins with her they 2 yrs old.
Disappear how?
I did. I had to for three sake of my mental health
my husband is in the same situation... I have sat and watched for years as his daughters treated him worse than a stranger on the street. It is only so much disrespect a man can take from a child before he gives up.
You have made it clear that you are a narcissist. We all know what to expect from that. I personally watch you because my sons dad is a narcissist (not diagnosed). Every video or article written by doctors,therapist,etc. that I’ve read about narcissist sounds like it was written about him. BUT hearing examples FROM a narcissist is even more validating.
So don’t worry about no one judging you. We are all well aware you are a narcissist which means you have done what narcissist do…. 🤷♀️…
If you were not honest about the situations you talk about then you wouldn’t be doing your watchers any justice. That’s why we watch yours videos is to learn more about narcissist. Please always remember that.
Wow ...I didn't think it was possible for a narcissist to ever recognize, not to mention put themselves out there! Much respect my man for trying to figure yourself out as we all have our issues to sort out as we navigate through this crazy beautiful life!👊👍🙏
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Thank u I needed this today bc he’s so crazy he has his family on his side wen he acts up so further reason I cannot do this without the authorities. No longer taking inconsistent payments so filed child support n tired of attitude n inconsistency with care so I told him we could do the court thing to update our parenting plan just pray for my strength ten more years. N ur right im done with his access to me it’s only to my son now
Do not fear judgement. It is through your truth that we are learning and healing. Your followers know this. Thank you 😊
Please, please do more videos on coparenting with a narcissist. Sometimes Parallel parenting isn’t an option (judges refuse, etc). What to do then? What do you suggest when you’re dealing with silent treatment and stonewalling regarding your kids’ care?
Thank you for the clear suggestion on what to do about phone access.
Following
Judges are becoming dog shii. Ain’t no way they not aware of how ppl are and deal with ppl everyday. The courts allow these ppl to control situation because they courts back they behavior
To see the growth over the last 3 years In your presentation 🙌
Yes everything you said is exactly what I’m dealing with. We’ve been separated 4 months to the day and his full on crazy has come out. He mindfks them. Uses the oldest, she’s 10, as a messenger, speaks bad on me, demands things of me thru her, telling them about his potential new gf’s which confuses my youngest. If I ask him to do something he intentionally won’t do it. Even if it’s for the good of the kids. He emails me all kinds of crazy demanding, insulting crap. Calls me abusive. Then will turn around and email how much he still loves me an hour later. I’ve read in my healing journey about some narcs being emotionally incestuous with their kids. I believe he does that too. Texting her all kinds of things that you’d text a partner. I love you so much, you’re my whole world, you’re so mature dealing with everything it mom put you thru Constantly love bombing her. Gave her a necklace he originally bought for me that came with a poem titled To My Wife. Absolute crazy train. Signed my kids up for therapy because they’re more angry and aggressive than they used to be. And I’m not telling/asking him either. These people do serious psychological damage to the ones who love them the most.
My soon to be ex is a text book covert narc. He is using our three kids for his power now. Everything my 14 year old son has said to me is his father's exact words and it's all mommy's fault. It's so sad and no one sees it. The justice system is a failure and has no recognition of this type of abuse. This is where the system fails our most vulnerable. Thank you for being so open and bringing awareness.
Wow . Thanks for having the courage to get on here and be honest. I am currently dealing with some bs with my daughters dad. Sooo narcissistic. I’m starting to see his tactics now so I’m trying my best not to cuss him out ! Or get mad bc it’s all a game to him. I know that he’s unhappy in his personal life so I want to have compassion but it’s hard bc I feel like I’m stuck 😩
This is a timely message. Two nights ago, he called at 2:18am. Up to now, I never responded. He left a love song and a message that said I have his 💙. Cmon, at that hour??? You rightly said it. It is to check up on me. I am gonna listen to you Mr. Lee. Parallel Parenting in full effect !!! Yeah.
This ain't nothing but the truth! I'm going through this as we speak
Your videos have been a lifesaver. I feel heard and validated for setting boundaries with a toxic ex
I so appreciate your openness and honesty about your journey. You’ve grown and are now helping those of us dealing with narcissists by validating what we are experiencing.
I respect you for being truthful….
It is so powerful when we admit our past moments of weakness. The lessons become incredible tools. For all of us who wish the NPD in our life would admit their behavior, it is cathartic you'd share and be apologetic about it. Thanks for your honesty. ❤
I am amazed by the strength you have to tell your truth and shed some insight into your thought process.
I am dealing with the same issue except I'm the mother's new man/fiancé.
I've seen a lot of evil in this world, but how far you have progressed beyond your illness and how unflinchingly you stare your mistakes in the face have restored a part of my faith in humanity that I never thought I would get back. I hope you're proud of yourself for the effort you've put into your transformation. Seriously, congratulations.
Totally understandable being nervous talking about this stuff but since I found your videos on tiktok, your advice has helped so much in raising my son while parallel parenting. I am so thankful for you being open and honest because before having my son, I’d never experienced this before. So by you telling your story and giving your take on things, it puts me at ease and makes me feel validated in my experience with a covert narcissist. Super thankful!
Mine makes sure he never gives me a break knowing I have rarely any family here. I plan on moving back home. I feel like he purposely holds me back while he purposely throws little stuff in there about how he lives his life freely. Kids don’t stay small forever ❤and my village is on the way
They really think the children will stay children forever. Mine literally tells our preschooler she wishes he could stay little forever.
Same
I adore everything about your channel, Lee. If my diagnosed hubby is gonna have anyone to watch and learn from (and he does!), I'm happy and blessed it's you! 🙏👏✌🌷
That's right! Judge not that you aren't judge. Anyone can 100% change when they ACKNOWLEDGE there is a problem with the behaviors one is doing, otherwise, if they don't know or don't care, control only what you are able to control. I am SO GRATEFUL for you, Lee!! Self-aware Narcissistic on your road to more freedom, and sharing your experiences for the love of people and to stop the hurting. There is so much to battle with narcissistic behaviors. It is seriously an ART! I appreciate all your content and what you are doing! Thank you!!!!
You are awesome!!! Thank you for being honest, it is so helpful with validation that I am not crazy and he is intentionally doing these things. I appreciate it
You are so welcome!
I subbed because of how honest you are even in identifying yourself as a narcissist.
I appreciate your cander and honesty. Everything you are saying is exactly whats happening at the moment. These videos are very helpful
My BD narcissist said he would take the kids from me if I had another man around my kids. Mind you, I have NEVER done that lol and he cheated, had a girlfriend and ALL, but doesn’t want me to cheat on him back Lmfao or have a man around them. Which I wouldn’t out of safety anyways. The punishment, misery & delusion is REAL. I pray for all of us who’s going through this 🙏🏽
Mine said the same thing to me and turned out he was living with a girl the whole time 😂😂
@@Believerfearless Girl !!!!! These BD narcissists are something else !! 😭🤦🏽♀️ Biggest hypocrites EVER. I feel for you 😭🙏🏽🙏🏽
I respect your honesty. I'm on the receiving end of this from my ex-wife. I've managed to mitigate some of the drama by consistently keeping conversations short and cordial, taking most communication through text messages, enforcing boundaries about her calling me at night, making her stick to the child custody schedule (with veiled threats of legal action) and not taking the bait for arguments (anymore). Fortunately she's scared of going to court, so I can use this to keep her somewhat in check. And I don't go in that house!!! Last time I did, I saw she still had pictures of me and her on the bedroom wall 😲.
The girl I am with makes me want to give up, it’s indescribable how she makes me feel
I'm going thru this now this is right on time and I learned alot from your vids thank you !
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Thank u for getting help and sharing your experience with us. My X husband is a Narcissist and Parental Allianation and I am scared to death of the effects this will have on their lives and our relationship. My son Michael 21 Katie 19 Rachael 19. They are Very good kids Thank GOD! The things he says to them yells at them ect. makes me feel soooooo bad. This was done to me by my dad and I hate him. The emotional abuse and everything he did or didn’t do make me SICK. I see my kids when he is around they side with him and I am invisible. When he is Not around they treat me differently. We have a good relationship. R they afraid if they don’t side with him he will be mean to them. He still wants to talk to me and the kids and I have our own relationship. He needs to mind his business. Get a life!
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I love the honesty. It's needed
you got it
Thank you for being transparent about how it made you nervous talking about this. My ex does these things alllll the time. Now he is withholding their medical information after a traumatic ER visit. It sucks.
Can you go directly to the provider and get it?
I'm starting to see this now. I walked away from my narc months ago. Best thing I've ever done. He'll never get an ounce of emotion from me ever again he's a person non grata. ✌
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Thank you so much for your perspective, my ex husband is a covert narcissist and what you described is him down to a T! It’s really validating hearing you confirm my suspicions all along. I am now implementing parallel parenting and have to block communication until the date of the visits because he won’t respect one single boundary. I get why this can make you feel nervous at time bc essentially your doing the hardest thing - admitting fault in oneself but teaching and helping others heal in the process. I’m very grateful, thank you!
OMG! I instantly subscribed and hit like before the video loaded! Im crying wit a smile as I place my first comment, ever, on any platform lol we'll scratch fb lol honestly my dude, thank you so f'n much for being honest, sharing your real self! your true all mighty powerful self is being shared as it was meant to 😊🙏 my situation with a woman and her 3yr girl.. Bubs adopted me as her dad.. My GUY, your strength, in this moment has given me strength in a vulnerable time. THANK U FOR BEING THE REAL U 💯
I've seen hundreds of narcissist videos but hearing it from a narcissist himself is different. You say thing doctors or professionals wouldn't bring up.
Don’t even worry about being judged. The majority of people watching your videos have experienced narcissistic abuse and are amazed at the fact that you have enough self awareness and ability for growth that you can at least talk about what you have done and change your behavior.
Mine Never sticked to his court ordered schedule, can never be asked for ANYTHING concerning money, and the day to day well being of the child. He used to do parent alienation! Lie to his gfs/wife etc about the things others are doing all while it’s HIM! They are truly untrustworthy human beings who are ALWAYS the victim……
Which is why I just don’t even speak to him altogether
Congrats on 40k, Mr. Lee! 🥳🎉🎊
Thank you
This is my daughter dad’s he is a narcissist & he is trying to ruin my life it’s to the point that I’m literally ready to sign my daughter over to him and, leave because he refuses to act like an adult, refuses to be a good dad, his only mission is to make life hard for me because I have no family support for our daughter I can’t take it anymore.
Don't give up for ur daughters sake. Tune him out. Ignore him. Stick to the schedule and take it up in court always even for little things. Don't deal with him. Don't even give eye contact. Go to the courts of he is not treating ur daughter right. If he doesn't honor the schedule petition to remove his visits. There is no reason u should have to play games with him.
Only a person who’s been through this can understand how a mother would get to the point of walking away from her child to Escape this game.
@@BreakingChains_ManifestingMe this is horrible than you must be part of the problem …. Honestly you guys sound like a narcissists .
This is the point I'm at because I'm tired and don't feel guilty for being willing to give him our son because he's attached to ME not our child and I'm over the obsession.
@ArielAngelique1 Hey honey I'm glad I saw your comment it's been awhile since I commented this. I can say that even though it's so hard being in a situation like this not feeling like no one understands it my daughter reminds me everyday on why I can't give up on her no matter what I have to deal with fron her dad. Trust me our kids see what we go through & every sacrifice we make for them eventually they will see who's doing what & who isn't, who's actively being there everyday & showing up for them and, who's not. My daughter let me know that she would never want to leave me or, stay with her Dad permanently although she does go for bi-weekly visits now. That was everything I needed to keep pushing & honestly no one is going to love our babies like us Ever! I just want to say hold your head up high & keep pushing. I encourage you to use any & all available resources at your disposal to help you move forward in life. Most importantly, just give it to God he's literally the only person who sees what we deal with behind the scenes & will not leave or, forsake us even when it feel like he has. I will be praying for you & your baby just keeping holding on.
This was so helpful. My children’s mother is definitely a narcissist and it seems like a nightmare at times !
Be the change you want regardless of people opinion. Thank you for this video
Really respect you using your experience and learnings to share knowledge with us, its brave to be vulnerable
appreciate it
Appreciate your openness my man I'm dealing with a covert narcissist wife 10yrs i never figured it out until the cheating and the final discard discussing started Google n 🤯 now she won't let me see my son and the guy she cheated on me with is hanging out with my boy ppl think im the bad guy.. now family court spend whatever money I've got that would be used towards son... Backwards
No judgement. Just very thankful for the honesty.
This whole video is what I’ve been going through and am still dealing with! Thank you for your perspective!
I think what you are doing is pretty amazing and your vulnerability is helping/will help a lot of people. Thank you for being brave and sharing from this point of view.
I don't wish this situation on anyone. Just because we are parents doesn't mean we need to put up with this.
Hi, May Yah blessed you, son.
The first part of healing is to be able to admit there's a problem...❤keep praying and Yah will bless your growth. Much ❤
At least you can admit it , good for you !!!
Appreciate your honesty Bruh, healing indeed
So awesome you’re awareness… of getting nervous and just in general!! 👏🏽
Thank you so much for your honesty.... dealing with my partners narcissistic ex, it's very challenging, especially with the alienation, and what I perceive as emotional abuse of the children, and she definitely uses his visitation time with them to try to get at him, belittle him and punish him for leaving her. She even calls his mom and laughs about the fact she does these things. I'm not violent at all, but I swear I be wanting to slap the crap outta her, especially when I find him off somewhere crying because all he wants is to be a dad to his girls. We will get through this though, peacefully, she can do whatever but he's not relinquishing his daddy duties.
Me too.. It's hard to watch your man parallel parenting. She makes it very hard. I'm proud of him because the old him would've been in jail!!!
@@sharonj.9597 Stay prayed up Sis! You're not alone in the fight. Love over hate..... and when all else fails.. tell em to do what my husband doing, find a lawyer that specializes in "men's rights". Get it on paper legally, so when she decides to be petty she has consequences to face in court!
I'm the supervisor in the once a week hourly visit. The judge told her she isn't allowed to say one word to me or contact me at all I just show up wait for her to arrive. Ill be recording every visit because its been her word against mine for a long time and she might accuse me of things. I have a right to stop the visit if she talks to me at all.
Thank you so much for being so honest … your Chanel helps me understand lot of things what makes sense now . I can’t thank you enough 🙏🏽
I needed this today. Thanks 😔 thus stuff is tiring to deal with. I wish my ex could find this and just stopping already. People understand mental intelligence before becoming involved with individuals.
I’m up at 4am trying to get peace and learn how to deal with my ex .. I’m so exhausted….😢😢😢😢 divorced three years and still daily going back and forth I want it to stop.. I refrain so many times from defending myself.. I hope to get some nuggets
Really really appreciate your openness and honesty, this is exactly what I am experiencing.
I love the sheer honesty, "like nah bruh, we're f*ckin terrible, parallel parenting is the way to go!" you must have done so much work on your mental health just to be able to break down how you interacted with your ex and that it was toxic. You give me hope for my brother, keep up the good work! Subscribed!
Thank you
I appreciate the honesty of the pettiness and various situations. We all do that to get back at the other for this or that. It is natural to want to combat something we get hit with. With children we don't always manifest our best and fail them. We can all do better when we just take that hardline and that L and focus at the kids. It sucks and it is a DIFFICULT task. This is some real stuff
This is my first video of yours that I’ve seen and I want to let you know that I really appreciate your honesty. No judgement here
This man is nuts 🤯🙄 I stopped communicating with him directly because he made it so hard to communicate. So I blocked him and communicate with him through my sister. It's sad but I needed some peace and my sanity 😩😫😖
😳😳😳
It's a roller coaster ride I can't seem to get off of and it's affecting every aspect of my life
Thank you so much for breaking things down. I've been trying parallel parenting for a bit. It's still pretty hard.
My son keeps getting put in the middle. My bd asks tells him to ask me questions to put me on the spot. Or put me on the phone to berate me. It got so bad that I had to tell him the moment that phone gets handed to me I'm going to assume their convo is over and hang up. He's at least stopped asking to put me on the phone now.
Between the bd, his mother and wife my son is constantly in turmoil. All three pull some off the wall stuff but my son is currently grounded enough not to fall for it but as a kid with feelings/thought of his own he's at their mercy.
They heavily object to my son taking his allergy, adhd and depression meds (son had previously been suicidal and suffered trauma). Doesn't want to hear what I say but gets mad when I suggest he talks to kiddos therapist or that he do the allergy test himself. Sometimes I fear to spite me he won't give them to him.
I try to give the benefit of doubt but I have to wonder if there's a limit to how much harm they will cause just to do the opposite of something I did/set in place. Is there ever a limit or is just one of those things that differs for everyone?
He abused us, cheated, lied constantly, controlled me, discarded & divorced me, then moved to a different state. It took me a long time to catch on because he's covert, was gaslighting me & believes himself to be a good man.
He left our child & his children from a previous marriage (he had 50% custody & I took care of them). I have full custody now & he has supervised visitation. I'm uncomfortable around him because he constantly lies & is very entitled, pits people against each other behind their back. He does fake being nice.
I'm only afraid of him getting some form of custody & hurting one of the kids. His first wife & I became friends after he discarded me & we are documenting his history of abuse to protect the kids. I hope we are successful, he has a history of being unsafe.🤞
Brother, I so appreciate your vulnerability.
Thank you for validating my feelings for what my kids’ other parent does
I got it! I knew u would direct me to the right place! Thank you so much for sharing your journey and advice for us!! U rock!
Thank you for sharing and being honest. This was very helpful
My bitter ex wife who’s a narcissist enjoys either calling the cops or taking to court since she can’t control nor phase me. So miserable.
He will NOT leave me alone,it’s mentally exhausting.
The narcissist made the mistake of letting his new supply put tape around my child’s mouth and eyes because he said he didn’t want to watch a violent movie. I’m done with the narcissist. Our child will never go over his father’s place ever again!
God bless you and I do happy that you're helping people of out what took place with you. I believe This is your calling from God
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Very helpful. Please do more videos like this! Especially on narcissistic stepparents!!!
Really appreciate your openness
There was just a bomb threat at my daughter's school. I called her father - his custody day - to see if he knew what was going on. He cut me off at the knees with "haha, yeah, the bomb threat? Tracy (his girlfriend) is there getting Dylan." Who the heck uses a bomb threat at their daughter's school to act like a total jerk? That's what brought me here today. Eight years of this crap, he also sabotaged my personal relationship via a smear campaign. "Co-parenting" with a narcissist has been one of the worst experiences of mine, and my daughter's lives.
This puts so much into perspective!! I had to share this wisdom with someone that is going through the same things!! Thank you so much for your perspective and how to navigate NPD!!!
I recently won full custody of my little girl and dad got ordered to FaceTime our little girl two days out of the week , this man ain’t called in months then he pops back up out of no where asking to speak to our little girl on a day that isn’t ordered , he leaves then expects me to break the order for his convenience after discarding his child the man is ridiculous . Glad I got away and enforced boundaries I’m currently documenting it all and about to serve him for contempt to revoke his rights a in n out parent is worse then a absent one .
This was validating and the communication tips very helpful. Thank you!
I’ve been with my kids dad for 10 years just found out he cheated on me twice. And he has a girlfriend I change the lock on our home. Text him kids schedule when they are available to him. Yes please make sure he only have access to the children. Be strong and have boundaries on yourself. I try to get sum from him like a last round for old time sake. He threw it in my face your the best but u mess up a beautiful thing we had! That’s when I just laugh and hung up in his face. Lock that door and keep moving forward! Trust me it hurts like hell but u will not regret it.