I realized I left out a crucial piece of advice in our chat about friendships in Second Life, so here it is: Please, let’s all remember the etiquette of not sending random friend requests. It’s so much better, and way more polite, to have a conversation with someone before hitting that friend request button. Sending requests out of the blue isn't just a no-no; it's a surefire way to find yourself blocked. Let's build our connections on respect and genuine interaction. Thanks for understanding and happy connecting🤪
with so many rules and codes, this is no longer a world to relax in lol, VR chat is much more fun, friendly, better controls, more freedom, movement and expression. if SL wants to survive the next generation of social online worlds, they need to force their aging community to stop being so uptight and have more fun, accept more random people to just be whacky and goofy! i got banned from a "new players" area for joking around and asking questions, i will never invest my time in secondlife because if admin in a sim has a bad day then you can lose access to an entire sim because some crusty 60 year old had an attitude or got confused about something and banned you with no appeals. Linden Labs needs to enforce a moratorium on bans and only allow temporary bans to be enacted in all sims listed as "public" or "new players". i get that secondlife has a stimga with "trolls" and greifers, but if you watch any of those videos all of those people always do it to an old person who is confused about how computers work and doesnt understand online culture, normal people who are going on secondlife with NO INTENTION of "trolling" get banned from NEW PLAYERS areas, its completely ridiculous.
@@tiorontoron7531 I'm over half a century old, originating from the era before mobile phones and color TV. My friend, who's about the same age, and I have been playfully teasing each other on Twitter since 2008. While some find our banter offensive, we find it amusing. The world has significantly changed, with many words now considered inappropriate. I've found that people nowadays often feel entitled and seem to have forgotten how to have fun, and you don’t even need to be friends to have fun. Regarding banning from a public region, I agree with you - it shouldn't be as simple as pressing a button.
I have been on SL 15yrs. It is difficult to make friends now because SL is a popularity contest more so. And people stick to themselves more now because almost everyone has been hurt by lies and drama.
This right here.. I had been on SL since 2009 and I have witnessed many peoples RL being destroyed from the drama that started on SL. I have witnessed both men and women be harassed, stalked, and exploited which left them broken. I have also witnessed Websites deliberately be made in attempts to slander and exploit people, and some of the things that were posted were simply unbelievable... I was actually stalked and harassed by a mod/staff I was like (WOAH). Thats where I drew the line, so I decided to leave last year. Like a wise woman once told me, participating on SL is like walking thru a snake pit blind, people's defenses are up for DAMN GOOD reasons.
I joined SL in 2007 and in those days it was common to spend time in community-built hangouts. There might be some streaming music if you were lucky, but most of the entertainment was talking in local to the people around you. You'd see the same people week-to-week and month-to-month, and you'd get to know them at what felt like a very natural cadence. Compare to the SL of today - I still spend time in world but it's getting rarer to have a decent conversation, and when I do have one it's less likely that I'll naturally bump into that person again. In some respects SL is mirroring modern RL a little too well with the lack of third spaces and sense of community.
Thankyou so much for showcasing Unison Prisqua, we consider you both friends to us and everyone who wishes to come and explore Unison is more than welcome
It's my 16th rezz-day today and Oh boy do I remember those 'good old days' :) I love shopping, but I'm also very lucky to have a few very good friends; both old and new. As long as we remember there are real persons behind the avatars, and be kind. SL still has a lot to offer on making friends :)
What an amazing video, thank you! I don't have that many friends in SL. Most are aquantances or people in my friendslist for a work relationship (I am a hostess at a venue for live singers in SL). But I have met love in Second Life. A couple of years ago, I was hosting and in the crowd was this guy. Shortandcurlys. What a cute name I thought. At the time I wasn't really ready for anything as I had just came out of a relationship and just did not feel like starting a new one. Rogue (which is shortandcurlys display name) tried to get my attention. He wanted to get to know me better. For months I did not see it and our contact was only in the venue when he was there to see his friends perform. Months after that we started hanging outside the venue and we clicked. I saw him in a different light, a beautiful one. Now we are handfasted in Second Life, and we have met several times in real life. Like you said, this happened when I was not expecting it and it bloomed into something so so beautiful. He is my husband, my love, my rock and my best friend at the same time and I am blessed to have met him.
I've been in SL since 2006. todays SL is about forming groups I find, people who identify with ones own needs and values. If someone is creative or if there's simply in second life to just communicate and make friends and even if people are into the same niche hobbies or not. I think Second Life through the years has evolved but it is still valuable to keep exploring and meeting new people till you don't sit still.
I have a simple answer which is a true to virtual environments as it is for school or any place... You have to spend time together. Too many of my friends list either don't log in much any more or log in for short periods or for specific reasons and then leave. My best SL friends are (were) those with whom I hung out. Friendship needs time together to grow. 😢
Before I even watch this video fully, I can say that one of the reasons it's so hard to make friends in Second Life is because everyone, nearly _every single person I meet_ refuses to reach out. Every single one of them waits for me to be the one to reach out to them. It's become a digital society of "I don't want to make an effort, you should" but it's nearly everyone. I also find that people who fill their profiles with what is essentially a "real life phobia" kind of feel most unapproachable to me. It just makes me think, "Okay, what huge thing is this person hiding that they're going to drop like an atomic bomb in the future?" And, the second thing that makes a lot of people unapproachable is the extreme amount of transphobia people put in their profiles. Probably without even knowing it. "If you're a MAN using a FEMALE avatar, don't IM me!" Second Life is supposed to be about being yourself, exploring who you are. And, for some reason, is also populated by people who hate the concept.
I would have to agree with this. To me it also feels like people what to be spoken "at" instead of spoken "with"...its weird and pretty fake for the most part.
7:15 I find it interesting that you only now start saying *in* instead of *on* Second Life. 8:47 ...and here you switch back again. With Second Life being a 3D virtual world, I've always spoken of being *in* Second Life. My name in SL is Vulcan Viper. I'd like to know what you think of my SL profile.
It's interesting that you noticed. I've always had trouble deciding between 'in Second Life' and 'on Second Life' because I view Second Life as a platform. Just as I wouldn't say I'm going to play a game 'in Xbox', but you're correct. I did ask ChatGPT for clarification. 'On Second Life' does have its place in certain contexts, so I'll correct it in my next video.
Voice chat wasn't everyone's cup of tea. Even today I prefer text over voice. There was plenty of people afk, or at least checked out of general chat because they were in private IMs with people. The difference from 2007 to now is I'm no longer in role-play, so interests changed. As far as profiles, not everyone is looking for friends, or they have particular interests. So I don't worry about it. It's not my place to judge or tell others how they should do their Second Life. If they want to have their profile be a fortress, oh well. If little to no profile, maybe they're not into making profiles and prefer taking interaction as a candid, face value experience of who they are, whether you like it or not. As the old slogan goes, it's your life, your imagination. So make of yours what you will, and, as long as they aren't doing anything illegal, give them room to make theirs what they will.
You're totally right, it really is up to each person what they choose to share in their profile. My point was more geared towards those who are actively on the lookout for friends but then have profiles that might make someone think twice about reaching out. It's all about finding that balance. After all, this is your Second Life. My own profile is a mix of everything that makes up my world here - from being a real estate owner to blogging and writing. I’ve also got sections dedicated to my partner and friends. It’s a little snapshot of my virtual life, showing off the different hats I wear in Second Life.
@@secondlifespectrum - I get it, and what you say is a good general rule of thumb. For one's profile can be like a resume or CV. Though that, too can be part of it, since not all people work in SL, and see SL as escape or recreation. Many hats works here, too, or maybe different nature, angle, or perspective. For instance, in roleplay, I had come across many a fortress profile. These tended to have demands, such as that they are a Para RPer, so if you can't write at least a paragraph to describe a scene and the action of your character, then don't bother. Or, they would say that if you can only introduce yourself with a 'hi' or 'hello', then you may be blocked, muted, or otherwise ignored. Sure, they are a fortress, standing there, imposing. But, for those understanding the nature of these profiles, and the perspective the person making them may have for making them in this manner, they may still be daunting, but for the right person, it's challenge accepted! For while there is the resume approach to profiles, there is also the 'work order', or publisher's approach to profiles as well. This may be common among RPers because of the particulars of what they are looking for, as new friends among them become like co-writers of particular stories and themes. For instance, there's no sense wasting anyone's time if a person looking for someone is seeking a RP partner in a modern day GTA or slice of life drama where you can only play as human, and the other person is wanting to do fantasy or sci-fi themes where their characters could rang from being the adorable neko that plays out damsel in destress roles, or is commonly a villain looking for an equally maniacal and scheming villainess, or that classic Catwoman - Batman scenario of star-crossed protagonist v. antagonist that under different circumstances might be lovers. So, yeah, that does put things in a different perspective, where a fortress style profile makes sense because of needing particular people up for the challenge and are interesting in, at first figuring out the story behind the fortress, but mostly are interested in being a part of a story. Of course, as an author may say about metaphors, that sometimes a rose is just a rose, sometimes a fortress profile is just a fortress meant to keep people out. Sure, if one of this type decides they want to be more outgoing, and are trying to meet friends, they may have to reconsider the use or necessity they may have thought they had for it when they first built it. Some people are very cautious, just like with whether to accept a random friend request or not. Yet with the fortress profile, depending on changes in one's approach or changing interests in SL, one can consider if they want to open the doors of the fortress, or remake the landscape of their profile entirely. Either way, it all comes down to the core of SL, that it is for each of us 'your world, your imagination.' 😉👍
So this time around, I decided to give my avatar a backstory and I had so much fun doing that. I hope that whoever encounters me in world will read it in full and get a good laugh and maybe start dialogue based off of that but it’s just a fun read nonetheless I hope that a lot more people Flush out their profile at least the second life part with a background story in detail of who their avatar is so you get an idea of who you’re interacting with. Like are you a villain a psychopath a fairy alien, etc. how’d you get here? I’m open to strictly platonic relationships but the only time anyone says anything to me is to ask where I got something and it ends there 😂
Yes there 2 kinds of friends in SL, good ones, and greedy ones, last will ever when youre building interupt, dont have a cleu. Good friends, you just say, sorry busy/building atm, and they respect that! There is voic, you can build and chat at same time, im not a fan of that.
Friendship is a complex topic, both in SL and RL. In fact, I'm starting a TH-cam podcast with a friend from RL, and our first topic will be about friendship. We met online in 2008 or 2009, and later met in RL when I traveled to the USA. We have been friends since then, forming strong opinions about friends, people, and relationships. To me, SL is no different from RL in terms of friendship. Nowadays, it is hard to meet genuine people period.
I realized I left out a crucial piece of advice in our chat about friendships in Second Life, so here it is: Please, let’s all remember the etiquette of not sending random friend requests. It’s so much better, and way more polite, to have a conversation with someone before hitting that friend request button. Sending requests out of the blue isn't just a no-no; it's a surefire way to find yourself blocked. Let's build our connections on respect and genuine interaction. Thanks for understanding and happy connecting🤪
with so many rules and codes, this is no longer a world to relax in lol, VR chat is much more fun, friendly, better controls, more freedom, movement and expression. if SL wants to survive the next generation of social online worlds, they need to force their aging community to stop being so uptight and have more fun, accept more random people to just be whacky and goofy! i got banned from a "new players" area for joking around and asking questions, i will never invest my time in secondlife because if admin in a sim has a bad day then you can lose access to an entire sim because some crusty 60 year old had an attitude or got confused about something and banned you with no appeals. Linden Labs needs to enforce a moratorium on bans and only allow temporary bans to be enacted in all sims listed as "public" or "new players". i get that secondlife has a stimga with "trolls" and greifers, but if you watch any of those videos all of those people always do it to an old person who is confused about how computers work and doesnt understand online culture, normal people who are going on secondlife with NO INTENTION of "trolling" get banned from NEW PLAYERS areas, its completely ridiculous.
@@tiorontoron7531 I'm over half a century old, originating from the era before mobile phones and color TV. My friend, who's about the same age, and I have been playfully teasing each other on Twitter since 2008. While some find our banter offensive, we find it amusing. The world has significantly changed, with many words now considered inappropriate. I've found that people nowadays often feel entitled and seem to have forgotten how to have fun, and you don’t even need to be friends to have fun. Regarding banning from a public region, I agree with you - it shouldn't be as simple as pressing a button.
I have been on SL 15yrs. It is difficult to make friends now because SL is a popularity contest more so. And people stick to themselves more now because almost everyone has been hurt by lies and drama.
This right here.. I had been on SL since 2009 and I have witnessed many peoples RL being destroyed from the drama that started on SL. I have witnessed both men and women be harassed, stalked, and exploited which left them broken. I have also witnessed Websites deliberately be made in attempts to slander and exploit people, and some of the things that were posted were simply unbelievable... I was actually stalked and harassed by a mod/staff I was like (WOAH). Thats where I drew the line, so I decided to leave last year. Like a wise woman once told me, participating on SL is like walking thru a snake pit blind, people's defenses are up for DAMN GOOD reasons.
I think this new generation is generally engaged in a popularity contest.
I miss the old days. It’s not the same, hopefully I can find it again
I joined SL in 2007 and in those days it was common to spend time in community-built hangouts. There might be some streaming music if you were lucky, but most of the entertainment was talking in local to the people around you. You'd see the same people week-to-week and month-to-month, and you'd get to know them at what felt like a very natural cadence. Compare to the SL of today - I still spend time in world but it's getting rarer to have a decent conversation, and when I do have one it's less likely that I'll naturally bump into that person again. In some respects SL is mirroring modern RL a little too well with the lack of third spaces and sense of community.
WEll me and Mia are virtually always at Unison if ever you want to pop in for a chat
Prisqua: you've nailed the "interpersonal communication" thing better here than anything I've ever seen (in 15 yeras), including rom LL itself.
Thankyou so much for showcasing Unison Prisqua, we consider you both friends to us and everyone who wishes to come and explore Unison is more than welcome
I enjoy reading profiles.
For many people, reading profiles is a pastime. I have a friend in real life who isn't on Second Life, but she enjoys reading any profiles.
It's my 16th rezz-day today and Oh boy do I remember those 'good old days' :) I love shopping, but I'm also very lucky to have a few very good friends; both old and new. As long as we remember there are real persons behind the avatars, and be kind. SL still has a lot to offer on making friends :)
What an amazing video, thank you! I don't have that many friends in SL. Most are aquantances or people in my friendslist for a work relationship (I am a hostess at a venue for live singers in SL). But I have met love in Second Life. A couple of years ago, I was hosting and in the crowd was this guy. Shortandcurlys. What a cute name I thought. At the time I wasn't really ready for anything as I had just came out of a relationship and just did not feel like starting a new one. Rogue (which is shortandcurlys display name) tried to get my attention. He wanted to get to know me better. For months I did not see it and our contact was only in the venue when he was there to see his friends perform. Months after that we started hanging outside the venue and we clicked. I saw him in a different light, a beautiful one. Now we are handfasted in Second Life, and we have met several times in real life. Like you said, this happened when I was not expecting it and it bloomed into something so so beautiful. He is my husband, my love, my rock and my best friend at the same time and I am blessed to have met him.
WOW
And I noticed at least 3 things I need to fix In Unison, ty Prisqua hahahaha
haha you would
I've been in SL since 2006. todays SL is about forming groups I find, people who identify with ones own needs and values. If someone is creative or if there's simply in second life to just communicate and make friends and even if people are into the same niche hobbies or not. I think Second Life through the years has evolved but it is still valuable to keep exploring and meeting new people till you don't sit still.
An amazing video!
I have a simple answer which is a true to virtual environments as it is for school or any place... You have to spend time together. Too many of my friends list either don't log in much any more or log in for short periods or for specific reasons and then leave. My best SL friends are (were) those with whom I hung out. Friendship needs time together to grow. 😢
this is an amazing video, in terms of just how we go about the relationships that we make on the web as well :)
Before I even watch this video fully, I can say that one of the reasons it's so hard to make friends in Second Life is because everyone, nearly _every single person I meet_ refuses to reach out. Every single one of them waits for me to be the one to reach out to them. It's become a digital society of "I don't want to make an effort, you should" but it's nearly everyone.
I also find that people who fill their profiles with what is essentially a "real life phobia" kind of feel most unapproachable to me. It just makes me think, "Okay, what huge thing is this person hiding that they're going to drop like an atomic bomb in the future?" And, the second thing that makes a lot of people unapproachable is the extreme amount of transphobia people put in their profiles. Probably without even knowing it. "If you're a MAN using a FEMALE avatar, don't IM me!"
Second Life is supposed to be about being yourself, exploring who you are. And, for some reason, is also populated by people who hate the concept.
Saddest thing ... you're probably right, but there are still a lot of genuine people out there ready to chat.
I would have to agree with this. To me it also feels like people what to be spoken "at" instead of spoken "with"...its weird and pretty fake for the most part.
There is only one life in which you can see second life and this will be it, all other experiences will be something else.
Extasis… 😊
7:15 I find it interesting that you only now start saying *in* instead of *on* Second Life.
8:47 ...and here you switch back again.
With Second Life being a 3D virtual world, I've always spoken of being *in* Second Life.
My name in SL is Vulcan Viper. I'd like to know what you think of my SL profile.
It's interesting that you noticed. I've always had trouble deciding between 'in Second Life' and 'on Second Life' because I view Second Life as a platform. Just as I wouldn't say I'm going to play a game 'in Xbox', but you're correct. I did ask ChatGPT for clarification. 'On Second Life' does have its place in certain contexts, so I'll correct it in my next video.
And Will be checking out your profile 😃
I would definitely like to pay for a professional profile. Mine is inviting but needs more pizaz. I am not good at wording it
Voice chat wasn't everyone's cup of tea. Even today I prefer text over voice. There was plenty of people afk, or at least checked out of general chat because they were in private IMs with people. The difference from 2007 to now is I'm no longer in role-play, so interests changed.
As far as profiles, not everyone is looking for friends, or they have particular interests. So I don't worry about it. It's not my place to judge or tell others how they should do their Second Life. If they want to have their profile be a fortress, oh well. If little to no profile, maybe they're not into making profiles and prefer taking interaction as a candid, face value experience of who they are, whether you like it or not. As the old slogan goes, it's your life, your imagination. So make of yours what you will, and, as long as they aren't doing anything illegal, give them room to make theirs what they will.
You're totally right, it really is up to each person what they choose to share in their profile. My point was more geared towards those who are actively on the lookout for friends but then have profiles that might make someone think twice about reaching out. It's all about finding that balance. After all, this is your Second Life.
My own profile is a mix of everything that makes up my world here - from being a real estate owner to blogging and writing. I’ve also got sections dedicated to my partner and friends. It’s a little snapshot of my virtual life, showing off the different hats I wear in Second Life.
@@secondlifespectrum - I get it, and what you say is a good general rule of thumb. For one's profile can be like a resume or CV. Though that, too can be part of it, since not all people work in SL, and see SL as escape or recreation. Many hats works here, too, or maybe different nature, angle, or perspective.
For instance, in roleplay, I had come across many a fortress profile. These tended to have demands, such as that they are a Para RPer, so if you can't write at least a paragraph to describe a scene and the action of your character, then don't bother. Or, they would say that if you can only introduce yourself with a 'hi' or 'hello', then you may be blocked, muted, or otherwise ignored. Sure, they are a fortress, standing there, imposing. But, for those understanding the nature of these profiles, and the perspective the person making them may have for making them in this manner, they may still be daunting, but for the right person, it's challenge accepted! For while there is the resume approach to profiles, there is also the 'work order', or publisher's approach to profiles as well. This may be common among RPers because of the particulars of what they are looking for, as new friends among them become like co-writers of particular stories and themes. For instance, there's no sense wasting anyone's time if a person looking for someone is seeking a RP partner in a modern day GTA or slice of life drama where you can only play as human, and the other person is wanting to do fantasy or sci-fi themes where their characters could rang from being the adorable neko that plays out damsel in destress roles, or is commonly a villain looking for an equally maniacal and scheming villainess, or that classic Catwoman - Batman scenario of star-crossed protagonist v. antagonist that under different circumstances might be lovers. So, yeah, that does put things in a different perspective, where a fortress style profile makes sense because of needing particular people up for the challenge and are interesting in, at first figuring out the story behind the fortress, but mostly are interested in being a part of a story.
Of course, as an author may say about metaphors, that sometimes a rose is just a rose, sometimes a fortress profile is just a fortress meant to keep people out. Sure, if one of this type decides they want to be more outgoing, and are trying to meet friends, they may have to reconsider the use or necessity they may have thought they had for it when they first built it. Some people are very cautious, just like with whether to accept a random friend request or not. Yet with the fortress profile, depending on changes in one's approach or changing interests in SL, one can consider if they want to open the doors of the fortress, or remake the landscape of their profile entirely. Either way, it all comes down to the core of SL, that it is for each of us 'your world, your imagination.' 😉👍
Excellent tips about the PROFILE!
So this time around, I decided to give my avatar a backstory and I had so much fun doing that. I hope that whoever encounters me in world will read it in full and get a good laugh and maybe start dialogue based off of that but it’s just a fun read nonetheless I hope that a lot more people Flush out their profile at least the second life part with a background story in detail of who their avatar is so you get an idea of who you’re interacting with. Like are you a villain a psychopath a fairy alien, etc. how’d you get here? I’m open to strictly platonic relationships but the only time anyone says anything to me is to ask where I got something and it ends there 😂
Would love to read your profile. Message me in-world?
@@secondlifespectrum my iw: babiegen
Yes there 2 kinds of friends in SL, good ones, and greedy ones, last will ever when youre building interupt, dont have a cleu.
Good friends, you just say, sorry busy/building atm, and they respect that!
There is voic, you can build and chat at same time, im not a fan of that.
Dang u need to learn how properly control ur front camera.
Pretentious twaddle, sheesh.
I find it hard to have a lasting friendship on SL, less people are talkative and some people are just out to scam everyone they meet.
Friendship is a complex topic, both in SL and RL. In fact, I'm starting a TH-cam podcast with a friend from RL, and our first topic will be about friendship. We met online in 2008 or 2009, and later met in RL when I traveled to the USA. We have been friends since then, forming strong opinions about friends, people, and relationships. To me, SL is no different from RL in terms of friendship. Nowadays, it is hard to meet genuine people period.