Head like a Hole

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ส.ค. 2022
  • This video was hard to film. Stay in touch to see what happens next.
    Like what I do? Purchase merchandise from LEAAD Farms here!
    www.caz-gear.com/partner-leaa...
    Comment on what you would like to see.
    Music you would like to hear.
    Cale Carlson grew up on his family century old farm in central Nebraska. He started farming on his own by renting ground from a neighbor in 1998. Cale Married Megan in 1999 and they went on to have 5 Children. In 2012 Cale incorporated his farm business LEAAD Farms (which is the acronym from their 5 kids). Cale has a passion for the farm and family as it takes a team to handle day to day operations of a diversified farm with Corn, Seed Corn, Soybeans, Hogs, and Cattle. Cale believes that everybody has a story to tell and encourages people to share their experiences.
    Get some Laura Farms shirts here! - www.caz-gear.com/partner-laur...
    Use code “LauraFarms20” for 20% off your order of Northern Chill water!
    northernchill.com/
    Send me your favorite snacks!! Or stickers! Or letters!! Or things that are special to where you're from!! I love it all. :)
    Laura Farms
    PO Box 536
    Aurora, NE 68818
    Here's where you can find Me!
    Instagram- @LEAAD
    Twitter- @LEAADFARMS
    Tik Tok - @LEAADFARMS
  • บันเทิง

ความคิดเห็น • 293

  • @donmears4090
    @donmears4090 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Seeing Laura's reaction to the machine breaking and your calm thoughtful analysis of what could be wrong proves that "The fruit does not fall far from the tree" is true. She seemed like she wanted to comfort you. This and Laura's statement about family privacy in her last upload shows me that she will be a good parent when that time comes. Thank you for showing me that agriculture is a family business in a first person manner.

  • @robertmorris8460
    @robertmorris8460 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Working in manufacturing for 40 plus years, I understand what it feels like when a machine goes down, work is unfinished, and plans are disrupted. It is part of the ups and downs of life that have made America the best country to live in. We step back, take a deep breath, weigh our options and figure out how to keep going. Thank you and all your family for sharing the ups and downs of farming.

    • @popeye1250
      @popeye1250 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yup, if you figure that break downs are , *just a part of farming* it makes things a lot easier!

  • @Screws619
    @Screws619 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    Thank you for showing us the highs and lows. I can feel the sadness and I’m so sorry. Without the lows we would never really know the highs. You’re a great father bc we can see your greatness in Laura!

  • @raymondpedrick2197
    @raymondpedrick2197 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    WOW i feel your pain as a retired small businessman I know that feeling when you have to pay the piper, but your outlook and the way you handle the lows are where you shine not only as a businessman and boss but as a father. Easy to see why Laura is the the wonderful person she is, good Job

  • @artwegener4341
    @artwegener4341 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Wow, I really felt your pain watching this video. Hang in there and thank you for sharing the good and the bad. I'm learning a LOT about farming watching your videos and Laura's videos. Thank you both for doing what you do.

  • @js7127
    @js7127 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Totally understand you getting quiet and just thinking things through. Some get all dramatic, you keep cool and work on a solution instead of assigning blame. A testament of your character you passed on to Laura.

  • @Husker3435
    @Husker3435 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    You’re a good, positive role model for your family Cale, hang in there hoss and keep em comin 🙏🏻🇺🇸🙏🏻

  • @garybaker6548
    @garybaker6548 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Wow! I happened upon Laura's channel a few months ago and have really enjoyed watching and learning about farming as my parents were raised on farms back in the day. I decided to watch a few episodes of your channel based on her comments and your guest appearances. The relationship you and Laura have is very special, as I'm sure you realize. As you tried to start the Miller, it was obvious her heart was aching and then she whispered, "I'm crying inside". She was feeling the same pain and disappointment you were without a single word having to be spoken. Your explanation of the difference between happiness and joy was very discerning. I know you're a proud dad for Laura's accomplishments, work ethic and attitude--she's a wonderful young woman. By the same token, I'm sure Laura is very proud of her dad for his accomplishments, work ethic and attitude--you're a wonderful example. I know you're proud of your other children as well. My guess is they share many of the same traits given the environment to flourish you and your wife provide to them. God Bless and thank you for all the work you do providing food, fuel and a phenomenal future generation to America.

  • @glennmiller1629
    @glennmiller1629 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Great outlook on life you're a good man Laura's lucky to have you as a father

  • @1lilfarm
    @1lilfarm ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Sometimes being the rock for our kids is the hardest job as a Father. Keep that joy in your heart so the kids can see it. 👍👍👍

  • @yog2u2
    @yog2u2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Happy Sunday! I’ve mentioned it a few times before, but it’s always fascinating to learn different aspects of what you all do. Stay blessed!
    🙏🏼😎☀️

  • @TBNTX
    @TBNTX ปีที่แล้ว +7

    That sux, Cale. Truly so. But you've just shown everyone what a tough job it is to be a farmer. It's not an easy life. My grandparents were farmers, so I get this a bit. It starts every morning before sunrise, and ends every evening after sunset.
    Most people conveniently buy their produce in grocery stores. Few consider how their foods were harvested and how they arrived on the shelves or in the coolers.
    Kudos to all of the farmers who feed us.
    God Bless!

  • @Curtisbock68
    @Curtisbock68 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Mr. Carlson, you have grasp the true meaning of Joy. I know that this happened a few years ago but its a poignant time in your life but holding on to Joy is key to Ture Peace. Thank you for sharing your life, you are brave.

  • @thirdeyenotblind007
    @thirdeyenotblind007 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    THAT SILENCE WAS VERY DRAMATIC.

  • @chrisread6103
    @chrisread6103 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Cale, if you ever don't do farming for whatever reason, mercy...YOU would be a Great mental health theropist. You just have that honest, caring, heartfelt, pure, sensitive way of expressing situations in a most positive uplifting way. I find your videos to be a blessed inspiration to my life and I have no otherwise family farming history personally speaking.

  • @lem1953
    @lem1953 ปีที่แล้ว

    That John Deere 5830 silage chopper is a real classic. Nice head on it. I have a 1990 John Deere 4455 that I bought brand new. We still use it with over 18,000 hours on it.

  • @thisArtistisUnknown
    @thisArtistisUnknown ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Hey Cale, I have been a long time follower of Laura Farms and every time you popped into her videos I always wished that I could see more all the jobs you got up to that we didn't see on Lauras videos. I only just found your channel the other day and was flabbergasted that I hadn't found it yet!
    I am loving your videos, the way you explain things and your optimistic attitude is very admirable. I really felt for you when you couldn't get the Miller started... to see the dedication and sacrifice thats taken by the top 1% of people (farmers) to provide the other 99% their food is extremely humbling. You have to fight constantly against uncontrollable circumstances like weather and mechanical failures to keep us all alive. I think so many people have no idea the sacrifice needed and I really applaud you for giving us a true in-depth look at the realities of your profession.
    I take my hat off to you, thank you so much for everything you do and all the sacrifices you make for us. Truly appreciated.
    Much love from a city boy all the way down in little old New Zealand.

  • @paulholmes7444
    @paulholmes7444 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My Dad used to have things breaking down,then decided financial payments and reliable gear was a better than endless repair bills and massive frustration. Farming is extremely rewarding and ultra frustrating and hard.I feel the pain,keep smiling and remember your great family

  • @Dannyp8038
    @Dannyp8038 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Really felt the pain there, wish we could do more to help. Hopefully your neighbours can lead you a vehicle while yours is down.

  • @ronbogusz4592
    @ronbogusz4592 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Feel your pain for this one. Stay positive as you always are.

  • @bobholmes4215
    @bobholmes4215 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awww man, that feeling when even your dad doesn't know what to do, and all you can do is stand and wait. I felt that. Respect to you guys, the problems you have to face.

  • @SuperVistaprint
    @SuperVistaprint ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Farming is such a rewarding profession, it’s more than a „job“…. But at the same time it’s always on the edge of a kick in the teeth. Stay healthy ya all

  • @chrisread6103
    @chrisread6103 ปีที่แล้ว

    Cale...I can ALWAYS count on You!!! for up lifting positive thinking words of wisdom and thats what brings back to even watch reruns. Some days I find you to be my Sunshine, my only Sunshine, you make me so happy...Thanks dear.
    (I had to euthanize my doggie 2 days ago and needing a big dose of Calo. THANKS dear heart!)

  • @danguritz2446
    @danguritz2446 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Sunsets are beautiful

  • @onenuttybuddy
    @onenuttybuddy ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Strength through adversity is always a winner. You are most definitely a winner in my book. Carry on soldier.

  • @Roger21989
    @Roger21989 ปีที่แล้ว

    Farming is not for the weak. The expenses are killer, the rewards are great! Keep the faith, we depend on you!

  • @peadenl
    @peadenl ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I remember that pain and frustration. I always spent an hour or two fixing equipment after everyone else went home. Wishing you some good luck!

  • @donaldmitchell5582
    @donaldmitchell5582 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hats off for hanging in to show the good,the bad, and the ugly
    It’s ALL part of farming.

  • @eagle___shadow
    @eagle___shadow ปีที่แล้ว

    Good morning everyone...but actualy is night😁😁

  • @m.c.laughlin2615
    @m.c.laughlin2615 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Best quote: “We laugh because the only alternative is to cry.” You should put your quote on a LEAAD Farm coffee mug. Cale, I sense you knew the situation of the engine the moment you tried to turn it over and heard “the cranking moan”. One thing I’m learning from your videos is how farmers use all the senses (including the sixth sense), to figure out issues. Plus, farmers with joy in their heart, are more likely to succeed in business. and in life.

  • @RandyKildow
    @RandyKildow ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thanks Cale... I've had too many engines go down and really put me in a tough place.. You loose sleep, loose the happiness in your heart, you just have to buck up and ride it on to a better time.. farming is tough.

  • @allenwenger9
    @allenwenger9 ปีที่แล้ว

    Finding joy in the journey

  • @georgeemeny6123
    @georgeemeny6123 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Amazing how farming and commercial fishing have a lot in common. Reliant on the weather and doing what can be done not to have equipment failures. I had to laugh, half way through video, I looked down and I'm wearing the exact same shirt, color and all. Good fashion sense my man! lol

  • @alexspectre962
    @alexspectre962 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    God bless you brother! Thank you for all you and your family does. Much love from Ohio.

  • @stormrider8957
    @stormrider8957 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for being authentic and sharing it all.

  • @bobkingsmore1901
    @bobkingsmore1901 ปีที่แล้ว

    God bless you and your family! Thank you for being a farmer !! We as a country need you

  • @lynpostlethwait3083
    @lynpostlethwait3083 ปีที่แล้ว

    Very great video for the farm 🚜

  • @Russv2
    @Russv2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    You're right, we love to see the good but also know that not all days go as desired or even close to as expected sometimes. I think we've all felt those moments of euphoria and despair many times. It's not easy to see "Happy Boy Cale" with his head in his hands voice full of frustration but we're here with you in the good and bad. Hoping great days come on the horizon again soon.

  • @raccoons392
    @raccoons392 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for another great video showing what its really like

  • @parkermcmillan8653
    @parkermcmillan8653 ปีที่แล้ว

    AS Heavy Duty Mechanic I can totally relate , keep on keeping on ...

  • @jeffsiegwart
    @jeffsiegwart ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Good luck on overcoming your difficulties. I have the greatest respect for farmers because of the many challenges that you face.

  • @user-sx7fz3lj4v
    @user-sx7fz3lj4v ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You're a good man Cale!

  • @UFOsExst
    @UFOsExst ปีที่แล้ว

    Hang in there brother! Dont let bad times pull you down! If i were you i’d start replacing the old equipment before they start failing too often! Save time and repair costs.

  • @willgallatin2802
    @willgallatin2802 ปีที่แล้ว

    I saw the recovery on Laura's channel. Rough day that. Hang in there. It will work out. If only we could keep the struggle bus from stopping by so blooming often.

  • @steveraynard5114
    @steveraynard5114 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for your openness, honesty ands for showing the good, the bad and the ugly. Keep going.

  • @troystenerson4723
    @troystenerson4723 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Good video!

  • @michaelf8302
    @michaelf8302 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for sharing your reality and the reality of what it takes for us to have food.

  • @keitholeniacz9249
    @keitholeniacz9249 ปีที่แล้ว

    Sorry for your trouble, keep the faith that things will work out for the better.

  • @kirbyrhodes4258
    @kirbyrhodes4258 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love the honesty. Tough situations like this and how you handle them show the kind of man you are. Keep moving forward. Let past handle it’s self.

  • @GerrituitDenHaag
    @GerrituitDenHaag ปีที่แล้ว

    You are inspiring people, God bless you.

  • @jamied.2734
    @jamied.2734 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Really felt the pain there. Been there. You handled it a lot better than I would have. Hope for the best.

  • @driver1421
    @driver1421 ปีที่แล้ว

    I glad you're not afraid to show the good and the bad, the happy and the sad of farming.

  • @davidk.7264
    @davidk.7264 ปีที่แล้ว

    WOW, had no idea, thanks

  • @MrDavidlfields
    @MrDavidlfields ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Man it sucks to miss the family stuff for work. Praying for peace of mind and solid solutions. Stay Gold.

  • @lazeppelin1
    @lazeppelin1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for sharing the whole stories. I know exactly how you feel. I then start to question everything about myself. But remember, ‘this too shall pass’. And remember that you are one lucky fella to be able to work with your family. Your children will remember and cherish these days, the good and the bad, their whole live.

  • @thomaspowers4952
    @thomaspowers4952 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thanks for the great (simultaneously upsetting) video. Totally get your pain and I'm curious to learn what happened. For what it's worth... Your positive attitude is awesome! Keep up the great work and look forward to you next video. Hope you and and the family have a productive week!

  • @KillingthisLane
    @KillingthisLane ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Keep your head up brother. Things will get better. Stay positive

  • @westrotter7847
    @westrotter7847 ปีที่แล้ว

    Its Sunday when I'm seeing you shred the weeds !! Stay blessed and safe !!👨‍🌾👍👍

  • @waynemonday3772
    @waynemonday3772 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for sharing. Bad or good. We're with you.

  • @howardroache9262
    @howardroache9262 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your dad is an awesome man your very lucky I absolutely love your videos thanks for sharing them with us

  • @shannonm2689
    @shannonm2689 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hello from Ontario Canada to all you we are havesting winter wheat first cut of hay is in

  • @farming4g
    @farming4g ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I feel your pain on the MAJOR breakdown... like a nightmare that one hopes never happens. Most don't even show the frustrations and being REAL. Definitely handled it great. Using oil, running long days... I can imagine what happened, was probably just a matter of time.
    Earned yourself another viewer; I appreciate those that keep it real. Sucks losing vacation time, been there done that.

  • @Mach34i
    @Mach34i ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for sharing. You are an amazing man showing the highs and lows of farming. I enjoy watching your vids. Keep up the great work. Your a great farmer boss and dad. Fyi beautiful state you live gorgeous scenery. Stay positive.

  • @ewagnerjr
    @ewagnerjr ปีที่แล้ว

    Kale, thanks for showing us the highs and lows. Keep your head up, you got this man!

  • @mpdonn317130
    @mpdonn317130 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Stay with it brother! Your description of joy re Laura was powerful. You are a solid man, dad and leader! We can all learn something from how you talk yourself through the circumstances and problems you can actually control. Mike D.

  • @johnsandell4501
    @johnsandell4501 ปีที่แล้ว

    Good luck and equipment joy to you!

  • @charleshilton578
    @charleshilton578 ปีที่แล้ว

    Brother man I have been there, not a farmer but an underground utilities. Thanks for sharing what you know you can't change. My pain was changing plans cuz had too for my business for my family. You and wifey you guys are the rock, you can bet that. LnR

  • @tonyzambos2393
    @tonyzambos2393 ปีที่แล้ว

    you talk all you like.....you work hard and play well in the mud....have a very nice family, love and respect.....stuff will always break down.....part of working hard....keep the joy and spread the love.....

  • @davidburley956
    @davidburley956 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your videos should be required viewing for farmers on how to treat their children. You are an amazing father and farmer. No wonder Laura is farming.

  • @klaw163
    @klaw163 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Dang, as someone who relies on mechanical things to survive I feel your pain. Sucks man, so sorry. Thanks for being willing to share the lows too, believe it or not it helps us all feel human when stuff happens

  • @toddbrown3610
    @toddbrown3610 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Vent all you want brother. Keep us updated love the videos the good bad ugly and joyful keep on farmen.

  • @DoingitWrong
    @DoingitWrong ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Oh, man! Yeah, when you are pushing gear to complete a task before it can be serviced and then it happens - kaboom. Feels like it always happens when there are other things calling for our time. You handled it great, better than me for sure. God bless you!

  • @george8873
    @george8873 ปีที่แล้ว

    Days like that make the good days so much sweeter.

  • @chrisjcannady
    @chrisjcannady ปีที่แล้ว

    You are a wise man

  • @TB-yv7wu
    @TB-yv7wu ปีที่แล้ว

    Cale I'm so sorry. You are a great person and a father example. Luck!

  • @rickfoss3541
    @rickfoss3541 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your frustration was palpable. We all have to deal with frustration which cannot be avoided. Our choice is in how we deal with it. Ya done good.

  • @michaellindsey1543
    @michaellindsey1543 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks!

    • @LEAADFarms
      @LEAADFarms  ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank-you Michael!

  • @terryreichert8345
    @terryreichert8345 ปีที่แล้ว

    Sorry this happened, you make the best laid plans and with the mechanical issues that you have to endeavor is hard to swallow. Your attitude and positivity helps you make it through. Enjoy your show and you do to keep on farming.

  • @Mikesmith-tm5sh
    @Mikesmith-tm5sh ปีที่แล้ว

    😊thank you and your daughter which you alto be proud of . For Farming ❤you y’all. Keep your head up. Thing are going to break when you are Farming

  • @westrotter7847
    @westrotter7847 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hang tough Cale. Its always something ya know that. Thick or thin we love you guys.👍😊🌞

  • @KnivesFAST
    @KnivesFAST ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I really appreciate you guys sharing the good and the bad. People need to know we're really goes into everything you do. I appreciate your calm but frustrated demeanor. Hope it all works out and keep that joy.

    • @LEAADFarms
      @LEAADFarms  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I appreciate that

  • @perspexsavant4787
    @perspexsavant4787 ปีที่แล้ว

    Always have liked your up attitude.

  • @rrevit2769
    @rrevit2769 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Been in trucking for 30 plus years. And it always hurts when something breaks down. You put your blood sweat and tears into it, And still the weakest part will let go. You being an owner/operator. Know as well as the rest of us, stuff happens. And it must have been so incredibly hard not to start cursing the machine... And kicking the dirt until you finally cool down. But your daughter was there, And being in her shoes is no fun either because she's got to wonder that's a wonder if she did something wrong even if she knows she didn't. And you know the work must go on. I've always respected the way you conduct your business... And also the way you have raised your children. Keep pushing brother.
    Brian in Tucson

  • @justinjohnson7395
    @justinjohnson7395 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for your videos. Love following your saga from out here in Seattle.

    • @LEAADFarms
      @LEAADFarms  ปีที่แล้ว

      Thanks for watching!

  • @jtn-minn8105
    @jtn-minn8105 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know that head on the steering wheel feeling, been there lots of times the last 40 years of farming.

  • @stevewhite8161
    @stevewhite8161 ปีที่แล้ว

    1,000% agree with you Cal and I'm glad you have the "Joy" and are bringing your family up knowing and understanding this as well. I'm very proud of you for being such a great role-model. I try to model this as well with my family and it's a joy to have you reminding me of this.

  • @robertcoblentz5933
    @robertcoblentz5933 ปีที่แล้ว

    you're doing a great job with the farm and family. keep up the good work.

  • @thublit
    @thublit ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Laura's Dad!! Subscribed.

  • @pemman
    @pemman ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I checked a few of the comments below and boy you Cale and Laura have a lot of people rooting for you and deservedly so. Really enjoy your commentary on lots of the videos you've done. I look forward to the fix on the Destroyer working out better and cheaper than what you may feel. :) :)

    • @LEAADFarms
      @LEAADFarms  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you! You too!

  • @KLRead1
    @KLRead1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am new to your channel, you just showed me what an outstanding man and father you are. You have me forever as a subscriber. May God Bless you and your family and help you in your life situations. I know he will get you through this and another day will come. Please don't let this discourage you. Have a great day and I look forward to more content and videos. From an old disable man ken

  • @Jon_Pearl
    @Jon_Pearl ปีที่แล้ว

    I've got to say... your parting shot into the setting sun, tells me - YOU'VE GOT THIS!

  • @kevinryan2556
    @kevinryan2556 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hang in there buddy🤞

  • @rockercover
    @rockercover ปีที่แล้ว

    5:29 - Outstanding and upstanding practice. Tip of the hat to you.

  • @davidkimmel4216
    @davidkimmel4216 ปีที่แล้ว

    We all that are farmers have down days. Farmers are a special family. We have to take the great days and enjoy them and pray lots on the bad days. He is by our side always. That is why He Made Us on the 8th day. 🙏

  • @jdas3833
    @jdas3833 ปีที่แล้ว

    I feel your pain as a business man And as a father . You sir Are a better man then I am. How you kept your cool when all you here in your head ca-ching ca-ching .And this is not going to be easy fix. I know you figure it out . it's not easy to show when this stuff happens . You show all facets of farming. Its not easy job. I am glade i found this

  • @paulsaenz7617
    @paulsaenz7617 ปีที่แล้ว

    Wow!

  • @mizenbarbarossa494
    @mizenbarbarossa494 ปีที่แล้ว

    That's why I like the wisdom of the ones who came before cause no matter how hard it gets for you the ones who survived have such stories to tell to gain experience and soften the blows because life don't stop kicking you just because you fall down

  • @michaelwilliams7481
    @michaelwilliams7481 ปีที่แล้ว

    Seeing you and Laura working together is always a joy. You protect Laura like a good father should, she is worth protecting. I hope the destroyer is not as bad as you think it is. But I think you know your machines better than most.
    I hope you manage to go on your trip.

    • @LEAADFarms
      @LEAADFarms  ปีที่แล้ว

      I did go. That was the correct decision.

  • @bryanthomas4298
    @bryanthomas4298 ปีที่แล้ว

    Sometimes it's just that one thing pushes you over the edge and you just need to step back sometimes. We all know that being positive is very hard sometimes. Sometimes you need to take that break and trust you have taught the others well and let them handle it so you get the special time with you children. Good luck!

  • @HanSoloDK
    @HanSoloDK ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Damn this must suck so much when things brakes down like that and then you missed the collage trip with your family. I really like how you try to stay positive like that. Best of luck to you and hope it will not be crazy expensive.