I already take my own supplements without care of. You sound like you're chronically online Dr Eric berg for those who are wondering where I get my supplements from.
@@peachesandapricots5010 fr our sweet moms need protection in this new internet era. My mom keeps buying cheap clothes off Amazon she doesn’t need and she used to say a person only needed 4 shirts . What is happening to our mamas ?!
@@baby.nay. honestly!! my goodness, she bought 5 bottles of rosemary oil because she saw that it was good for hair growth! 😭 i know that it’s not wrong, but i feel they’re more influenced than us
I don't know why you'd unnecessarily "break up" with a friend for no good reason other than "we've been through a season of friendship" when sometimes friends drift apart and back together. Condescendingly talking down to someone in a way that implies you're just too important to be friends with them ends a friendship in a way that I'd find it hard to pick back up at a later time even if that person approached me again. It just feels like you're being used.
sometimes you outgrow your friends and that’s normal. of course that never means you’re better than them, but they just no longer belong to your life, at least that’s how i see it. but of course, outgrowing people happens naturally, not forcedly
I’ve had to help advise my friend to break up with another friend. Friendships can be toxic too and it got to the point where every time they hung out she got belittled, berated or was told she was not a good enough friend, even though my friend was going above and beyond. Trust me, my friend did all she could and slowly phasing the other girl out, was not working. Some people need the conversation of, “we can no longer be friends because we are in different places in our lives. I cannot fit your needs as a friend anymore and I think it’s best we go our separate ways.”
@@fancychancey9253 Yes. I can relate to your story a bit. The only times I have done the "goodbye speech" type thing to anyone was when I realized the friendship was extremely toxic and one sided. That type of speech is only usefull in such situations where you are 100% sure you want to never speak to them again and don't care if the reciever gets butthurt reading your message. But even so that womans message is even more cold than I ever talked to anyone. I always wrote the reason why I no longer want to be friend with them in DETAIL giving multiple examples, while all this woman did was just say "I'm not gonna tell you the reason I'm sorry if it's confusing". Yes it is confusing... Just tell the reason! If it's just a simple example of friends falling out of touch there's no reason to do a goodbye speech lol. Cuz there's always a chance you can find time down the line to start hanging out again, but maybe just not so often. Maybe you can call eachother on the phone if you live far away and visit eachother once a year? You can find time for people if you want to, no one is busy literaly 24/7. That woman just want to burn every friendship bridge she has and make sure they never contact her ever again lol, that's how you lose all your friends but that's none of my business.
@@fancychancey9253 I still think there are better ways of phrasing it than the person in the tiktok did, even more so if the friend just can't be phased out because clearly they're not getting the hint and probably won't settle for something vague. Just be honest an say what they're doing is really hurtful and that you don't feel like they treat you like a friend should so you've made the decision that you don't want to be involved with them before. Explaining why you're 'terminating' a friendship can also be a healing moment for YOU - you get to finally say why their treatment of you is hurtful without having to be afraid of it sullying your friendship. It allows the person ending the friendship to gain back some of their power and autonomy. That being said, I do think that that woman's example speech is a good example of a wider discussion that is happening around the commodification of friendships. Due to things like 'emotional labour' and 'trauma dumping' being injected into the common vernacular through short-form content such as tiktoks without the adequate time to explain the concepts, people have started thinking of friendships as a purely transactional commodity, which is also why language that resembles something out of a HR manual (a context in which people are treated more as tools for a company than as human beings) has creeped in.
I didn’t even talk to my old friends when I cut ties with them. I just straight up ghosted them and tbh I regret doing that to one of them because she deserved an explanation. One of them rarely talks to the friend group in the first place, so it was a natural separation. The other one was toxic and verbally abusive. I couldn’t talk to her without her lashing out at me. Every time I tried to comfort her through her grief (she’s had lots of loved ones die during covid/senior year), she would berate me for not “comforting her right”. And she expected me to know how to comfort her because she thought we were similar (she flat out told me that). Not only that, but when whenever I mentioned crushes, she hated it. She once went into a rant how she would’ve harmed one of my crushes. I eventually found out she had a crush on me since 8th grade. I only have one friend now and I’m fine with that.
tbf if a friend was trying to 'break up' and they told me "I get that it might be hard to understand" or "I'm sorry if this feels painful and confusing" I think that would give me the boost of spite I need to just laugh in their face. 😫 So maybe there's some merit to what she's saying lol
As an autistic person, I feel like those sentences are good, because it acknowledges the other person's emotions. It also is direct, open and honest which are my forms of communication, and unfortunately a lot of people aren't willing to be direct, open, honest and are intimidated by me.
You'd feel spite because they told you they don't want to be friends anymore and then proceed to laugh in their face? Is that what friends do these days or do you just react immaturely to someone maturely addressing their feelings?
@@_n_a-ez5pc It's just the way it's worded that's the problem. The first phrase reeks of condescension and the second is akin to saying "I'm sorry IF I hurt your feelings." It's just empty and bizarre and yeah if someone I considered a friend said either of those to me, I would have no problem with ending the friendship 👍
@@Anonymous-bi5pv It's corporate lingo. It makes the whole thing sound condescending as heck - particularly when it's coming from someone who doesn't usually talk like that. Obviously there can be exceptions (it really takes knowing the person to decide how to appropriately respond), but when someone starts talking to you like this out of the blue one day, spite isn't all that illogical. Nobody likes their friend talking at them like a disappointed boss. Friends aren't bosses!
The lady hurt my soul, because I ended a friendship with my ex-friend for talking down to me like that to "correct" my behavior that upset him while being vague and making his issue everybody’s issue.
I'm really sure my sister started watching those friendship TikToks. She was talking to our family about a friend of hers who was distancing herself and the way she talked about it was really similar to the TikTok you showed us. I made fun of her for pretty much proposing a contract to determine if the friendship would stay on and of course she got mad.
Sometimes people are looking for answers to anything, it’s never so simple to dismiss it so perhaps get to the root of the problem and see if there is a way for her to communicate with her friend what she is worried about. You can walk her all you like, but at least you know in someway that she’s just trying to find some answers, even if the sources are not the best.
@Crickets I think that’s very fair. Answer and boundaries should be taught. I wish that there was more sources available out there for young people to access.
Making fun of her way of addressing the situation would make me mad too. She was trying to make peace and put out a suggestion to see if the friendship would continue and you thought "hey this is funny" and decided to laugh at her? Wow. People have different communication styles and address matters in a way that let's her see if things would work out visually on paper. Should she laugh at you for your way of doing things? Instead be understanding and try to find ways you can support her or learn how to cope with these things in a healthy way. I agree with @Crickets here in the comments.
Reply to n. If you have siblings then you already know how it is, say something that's a bit ridiculous, like a "message me x amount of times a week" friendship contract, and you'll get made fun of. Even more so when our youngest brother is 25 and she is the oldest one, we're not teens who don't know how to make/keep relationships (apparently she is tho). Still, us making fun of her doesn't mean we didn't have her feedback and how we deal with stuff later. Not disagreeing with the other replies, in fact I like their take. Only yours seemed dumb to me in how no one would laugh at it.
When I had this problem this is how I handled it: I’ve been feeling left out for months, so first I decided to give them a chance to speak for themselves, maybe I was thinking too much of it, maybe they were just minding their own issues, maybe they genuinely were busy, etc. I engaged with them and invited them everywhere, maybe they were feeling just like me, so I took it upon myself to meet up and have fun. Things still felt weird. I told them how I felt for the last months, how I felt like they were purposefully not telling me stuff and they were ignoring my opinions, how I felt a shift in their interaction with me. After 5 years friendships grow closer, not farther apart, so I told them. I got told I was paranoid and imagining things, I felt like, again, my opinions were indifferent to them. So I told them I didn’t like the vibe and that I would distance myself. Not a single one of them (a group of 6 people) contacted me to check on me, or try to fix things so I assumed I was right and kept going with my life. Im not someone else’s leftover. I’m not a second thought, I refuse to be with people who don’t want to be with me. It was hard, I felt so miserable, but I didn’t disrespect myself for "friends" who didn’t care about me like I cared for them. It’s been about 5 years. I reconnected with some people with who, for life circumstances, we did distance ourselves, and I’m very happy. I reconnected with people who actually thought about me they same way I did for them ❤
I wish I were you…when I had this problem I gave everyone the silent treatment because I needed to feel my feelings without being rude but when they tried to confront me they were super rude so I told them to f off lol
I’m similar in that a friendship of 6 friends all ended for me at once. It was a long time ago, I may have been a toxic friend, but nonetheless it was very traumatic and still impacts my relationships to this day. And that was 6 years ago.
@@SimonaBerr everyone has a pace, the goal is to be able to acknowledge when something is wrong and if it’s out of your control kinda trick yourself into not caring too much. Because that brings peace of mind, some people need to constantly fail and hit walls to "wake up" and some people with a single bad experience they learn, doesn’t matter which one you are as long as you always understand you have the control over yourself and how you act. It is achievable (I come from heavy trauma so I learned to put to practice this and emotional disconnection really young, 15. Also this happened to me at 24 with people my age, so understand this can happen at any age)
Me: I’m an introvert, and sometimes don’t know how to sound like a real person. My therapist: Try this, “I value our season of friendship…” Me: Um…I don’t think real people talk like that either.
LOL that’s so funny! Also for some reason ppl in the comments here are saying that it sounds genuine and is a good thing to say… so weird! I didn’t expect ppl here to be defending it. Especially when it’s pretty obvious that people don’t talk like that
@@RaspBerryPies I mean, I grew up making fun of the dialogue in movies and TV, and then I visited the US and people just spoke like that lol. It's possible this might be some kind of culture clash... or the people thinking this is good advice just don't go outside often.
It’s like if you’re a middle age European nobles daughter writing a flowery letter but not a real one in a novel written by someone who’s never actually read actual middle age nobles letter.
Yeah, a friendship “breakup” isn’t really necessary if you both drift apart naturally but might be a good idea if a friend is still very invested but you’re no longer feeling the same way for whatever reason. It’s not as common but it does happen.
My god the last one is literally my dad. He spent years working on our villa. He thinks that everything must be earned in some way. In the end he found himself with more debts than anything and he didn't let us (me and my mom) even have a holiday or go outside our region.
the throwaway "body builders in their weeb phase" line is so real, i didnt realize how many gym bros were hardcore love live oshis until a few months ago. they all seem to love ayumu specifically... yume e no ippo is really helping them get those gains and i cant even be mad abt it
They're so real for that because I also love ayumu and listen to her songs when I'm working out Yume e no ippo does wonders for getting those gains (source: trust me)
that guy giving advice with plant vs zombies music in the background, i know what hes up to... investing in ugly homes...spending thousands on landscaping to fight the zombies...i see you sir
Gotta be honest, i feel like slowly drifting apart and "I've enjoyed our season of friendship" are two opposite extremes of not handling ending friendships well. There's no way to end a friendship without hurt feelings on some level and you want the other person to not feel hurt long term so i get the logic of slowly pulling away from them. But if they ever ask "hey I notice you've been distant lately, is something going on" then are you just supposed to lie to them till they get the message you aren't interested. And that hurts worse for people who are invested in you and genuinely care about you as a person, because the best friendships grow stronger with time. Slowly pulling away, not responding as often, and when you do get back to them pretending nothing is wrong can leave the other person feeling like they're doing or have done something wrong to you. I feel it's better and more respectful to be direct, tell a person you're not feeling things the same way and while you don't want to hurt them that you don't want to hang out with them anymore. Just not with a "season of friendship" line. Obviously there are exceptions like when the other person shows they're abusive or the type to not take rejection without retaliating, those you need to be careful of getting yourself out of for your own safety. But if you called a person a friend I feel you should respect them enough to give them a sense of finality with the friendship being done if you really aren't interested in them anymore.
Personally, I’d rather just tell you to your face or let you know ahead of time that I don’t wanna be your friend anymore. I remember “phasing someone out” before and it just made me feel so cowardly and made the other person feel worse because they didn’t know why I was phasing them out. I vowed to never ever to do that again which is why tell ppl now. Especially if we were rlly close, you deserve to kno why I no longer want you in my life. Because if I don’t say anything they’ll just keep wasting their time trying to reach out to me. Being honest and upfront is always best for everyone.
From the bottom of my heart, I would MUCH prefer to be ghosted lol. That weird sterile language would live in my head for so long. Like just laying in bed at night like “what…. was that…” And I would feel so stressed trying to figure out how to respond in the moment during the conversation. I’d have no idea what was expected from me. Like “okay…??? thank… you…?? I’m sorry… about the season???” I can feel the anxiety just thinking about it lmao. Ghost me, or if they need closure, just send me a big text telling me what I did wrong and say bye forever.
@@BabyBear046 obviously if they were your close friend they wouldn’t use sterile language like they mentioned in the video. I, personally, wouldn’t. I’ve told people I didn’t want to be friends with them without using that language. Maybe you just can’t handle confrontation 🤷♀️
Edvasian, you made me die laughing when you said instead of 3 meals a day sometimes it's just a slice of cheese and a dream. 😭😭😭 I imagined that video of the rat sadly eating alone and then Edvasian sleeping in his bed imagining a banquet.
EASILY. 1. buy a house in cash and pay off our debts (cars, credit cards). 2. put the rest in savings. That would free up $2.5k/ month to now be disposable income and we'd still have a massive savings account for future emergencies/retirement.
the first 10 seconds was the most parasocial moment I've ever truly felt. I haven't had water all day and was thinking about my neck aching when he mentioned drinking water. I laughed so hard thinking "oh fuck he's right" then drank some water
Oh god that lady really pissed the hell out of me. My ex whom I very much loved and adored told me something similar in that exact same tone, after he cheated on me. Like THE AUDACITY!!!! I'd much rather just he ghosted me out of shame than being told he wants the best for me and what we did (cheating on me) is the best for me 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Oh man… if you have never broken up with a toxic friend, then you don’t know what it’s like. Lol it really comes down to talking to them as if you are in HR because no other way actually works. It’s the clean break away that leaves them no room to yell back at you as if you did something wrong. Fighting them makes them happy, ignoring them makes them angry and you can’t win unless you sound like a politician.
@@BabyBear046 unless you’re the type of person that responds like that normally. I had one where she would deliberately push my buttons to get me upset, and then I called her out in it and she would go “whatever helps you sleep at night”, I swear to god if i hear that phrase again i am about to strangle whoever says it and then myself
I feel like the biggest issue with 'therapy speak' is that the idea is you can stop someone from having negative reactions to what you're saying as long as you phrase it in a sterile enough way. If you're ending a friendship, it's going to be a bit of a rough time for you both. You can't avoid their emotions with any amount of HR speak. Sometimes you have to just let be people be angry or sad instead of trying to proactively avoid it.
The friendship bit reminds me of this time in middle school when one of my friends got a bunch of her friends together and announced that she had made a list of all of her friends and she was going to have to evaluate us and decide who she needed to stop being friends with to be more popular. We just laughed at her
great points about the friendship stuff but i just wanted to remind the audience that outgrowing people (even those who were your friends) is completely normal, specially if you’ve gone through traumatic stuff (talking from personal experience). maybe you shouldn’t tell them about it like the woman on that tiktok video but i think you know the drill
i had a person friend dump me and it sounded like this and then 10 paragraphs of condescension. it turned like 10 years of my feelings toward them sour entirely so at least it’s a complete break lmfao
I'd respect your honesty way more than whatever bs that lady was doing. Like if you're gonna criticize me at least make it constructive. Nag is something that can be worked on so at least you gave them the opportunity to do so by making them aware of it & also serving them the consequences of thier nagging actions which will hopefully make him more inclined to work on it & if not, then you gave him room in his life for people who accept him as he is. Probably the most optimal turn out there could be in these situations bc nobody was fake or coddled.
saw someone say that Therapy Speak is used to keep discussions between you and your therapist objective and impersonal, which is why it sounds so strange when people suggest using it around people you actually like
I just put a load of laundry in the washer, made myself some food and sat down to watch this so HA! That intro didn't get me! …. You should have posted an hour or two earlier when I was slumped over in bed.
I am pretty sure the music playing while that guy was shouting bad job advice was the tune that would play when you took your Nintendog out for a walk.
The nintendogs music w the loud guy got me like 😂😂😂 I still have my original copy of nintendogs dog walking theme somewhere. It survived going in the wash three times when I was a kid/teen.
Sometimes when I'm sad, I remember your channel exists & have a good laugh over your sarcastic remarks & chill personality. Thank you for existing, my guy✨
The yelling guy is correct for corporate jobs. I have LITERALLY gotten call backs because of that. Maybe it's different outside of California but it's super competitive here and most apps are rubber stamp rejected by an algorithm. Definitely do not use all caps tho 😭
Protip: If someone is selling you the method to get rich, YOU are the method. The people who sell these courses piss me off so badly. They talk fast, sound convincing, and drain the wallets of those sucked in by their crap while giving the most generic advice and nothing of value
Using corporate language and making such complicated answers is a huge red flag. If you answer like this on a job interview, how surprised everyone would be when you are hired and act nothing like this.
I think this woman actually thinks it sounds kind because it's "worked through" and honest, with the idea that being honest and open with your feelings always is best
I wouldnt call this stuff chronically online, but more along the lines of corporations in human skin trying to appeal to real people. I always thought chronically online being too in the current online sauce? Expecting everyone else to be equally up to date and invested in the most useless drama(or such), that has no bearing beyond the niche(or not so niche) corner of the internet they inhabit? I dont know. Thats how i was explained the thing
I was learning soft skills in my teen years and during an interview I leaned in and the interviewer thought I was trying to flirt with him. Cultural mish mash is wonderful. Not everything you read in a book is going to work out.
6:09 Me and my friend actually do think our relationship in seasons lol. She was there for a season and a half before moving away for a bit. She’ll be back in season 4 though. It’s also because i just wear the same outfit everyday, and the moment i switch that outfit (like once every few months) that marks a new season.
That guy with the real estate advice had me dying of laughter 😂😂😂 good thing I’m at work at the emergency room. He’s really serious with his content and the comments don’t correlate with his messaging. Lol
I have treasured my season of watching this video, but as I approach the 15 second outro I can feel my brain that has been absolutely fried by short form content clawing it’s way out of its skull prison. I appreciate the opportunity to watch this video and look forward to the future development of my short attention span and my desperate need for instant gratification.
2:26 "forgetting to take care of your health" really speaks to me haha. not sleeping, eating and drinking enough while you work on your laptop in school isnt gonna do you any good. Y'all please take care, eat a balanced diet and drink enough water and please get enough rest and if you look at the screen a lot, remember to take screen breaks. I know it isn't easy to do that, cos I can barely do it myself, that's why my teacher called the ambulance on me and I sat confused on the floor throwing up last week. But maybe I was still weak from my cold and stress. But like, listen to your body when it tells you you're tired or get a headache, take a break and eat and drink something. Stay safe!
That second video reminds me of those loud ass commercials that would come on in the middle of the night and wake you up out your sleep when you forgot to turn the TV off 🤣
"Did yo know your headache is because you've been staring at your phone for 3 hours without drinking anything" Can you imagine the EXALTED SMUGNESS I felt when this is the first video I watched upon getting home from 2hrs gym+liter of water while there?
7:47 Lmao it’s so hilarious all what you said before this because I was thinking EXACTLY, “This is how I sound when I explain to my therapist why I still haven’t reconnected with or made friends.” 💀
I had a friend "breakup" with me once. He said something like too many people want to hangout with him and so he doesn't have any time for me. It was one of the most hurtful things I've ever heard. When an SO breaks up with you, you can be like "Maybe she doesn't see us working out in 10 years." When a friend breaks up with you in favor of numerous other friends it's kinda like they don't like you on any level.
The "finance guy" from like 11:45 onward sounds like he has his teeth glued together with chewing gum when he speaks. I would definitely take the 1 million in a heartbeat.
after he was taloking about volume, this kroger ad just destroyed my eardrums when this middle ages white soccer mom sounding ladyscreamed about some fresh producs
rude of that tiktoker to deliver the sad friendship season finale news without asking first if the other person is in the right headspace to receive that information :(((
Imo, this one is more respectful than saying “oh I just don’t fw you anymore.” 😂😂😂😂😂 I just think that honest communication is a lot better than just being a hot mess
no my back pain and dehydration are chronic, and the only way I can cope about being bedbound is by going online lol. you got it backwards in my case. it pisses me off people take their health for granted so much.
ive "phased someone out" before and wont ever do it again bc yeah they felt bad & i felt bad but it also made them victimize THEMSELVES even tho there was a clear reason i phased them out which was them 👎🏻
I had someone do that first thing to me- with the weirdly clinical language and all that exactly like the skit and it broke me. Don’t do it. Just don’t
I'm a well adjusted adult - I hope! - and I do NOT talk like that. It's hokey! I've had many friendships in my life, some are still going on since elementary school, junior high, high school, and since meeting them in the 1990s, but other friendships were really just for a season. But they just faded away. We lost touch or what have you. None of us talked about things ending. They just ended. I think I might laugh if someone tried to end our friendship talking really hokey or like someone trying to fire me nicely. *eye roll*
This was put really well. I see it the same way. Maybe it's just because I move a lot and job hop a lot, but MOST of my relationships end sooner than we would expect, just because of material circumstances. So the idea of someone ending something formally in this way just feels goofy to me.
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First respond to the king cuz yes
Also yes!!!!
ed the ad man over here
I already take my own supplements without care of. You sound like you're chronically online
Dr Eric berg for those who are wondering where I get my supplements from.
I forgot that your name is actually Edwin. I was surprised when I saw it on the little pill package
"I saw it on TikTok" is gonna be just as credible as "I saw it in a Buzzfeed video"
Here it is I saw it on Facebook and WhatsApp University.
“I saw it on tik tok” = “drake really doesnt use auto tune”
@Malhadado Epígono | Daybreak my mum keeps following the remedies she sees on there 😭hv to convince her not to lol
@@peachesandapricots5010 fr our sweet moms need protection in this new internet era. My mom keeps buying cheap clothes off Amazon she doesn’t need and she used to say a person only needed 4 shirts . What is happening to our mamas ?!
@@baby.nay. honestly!! my goodness, she bought 5 bottles of rosemary oil because she saw that it was good for hair growth! 😭 i know that it’s not wrong, but i feel they’re more influenced than us
Moral of the Story: Don't trust people online.
Just take out the online part
@@white_isnt_a_race2338 irl at least the people (that you know of) think twice before pulling bullshit out of nowhere
@@white_isnt_a_race2338 let it all out
Mm, idk if I can trust this advice🧐
Wait...👀
the fact that i'm watching this within 10 minutes of you posting means that i'm on a new level of chronically online
Same bruh same
why is this so true 😥
"I've evaluated my life and have decided its time to go"
- a nice succinct suicide note
You okay?
If u need help bro there are a lot of hotlines unfortunately TH-cam doesn’t let u put links but have hope it gets better ive been there 💚
Now I’m concerned. You good?
I think it was just a joke, guys, I mean I LOL'd 😂
Why didn't laugh so hard??😭
My college roommate talks like the first video and it’s devastating to fully express your emotions and receive a HR response
That's horrifying yet hilarious. I'm sorry you were cursed.
That psychologist lady got her PhD from TH-cam Apologies and had a Masters at Better Help
I don't know why you'd unnecessarily "break up" with a friend for no good reason other than "we've been through a season of friendship" when sometimes friends drift apart and back together. Condescendingly talking down to someone in a way that implies you're just too important to be friends with them ends a friendship in a way that I'd find it hard to pick back up at a later time even if that person approached me again. It just feels like you're being used.
sometimes you outgrow your friends and that’s normal. of course that never means you’re better than them, but they just no longer belong to your life, at least that’s how i see it. but of course, outgrowing people happens naturally, not forcedly
I’ve had to help advise my friend to break up with another friend. Friendships can be toxic too and it got to the point where every time they hung out she got belittled, berated or was told she was not a good enough friend, even though my friend was going above and beyond. Trust me, my friend did all she could and slowly phasing the other girl out, was not working. Some people need the conversation of, “we can no longer be friends because we are in different places in our lives. I cannot fit your needs as a friend anymore and I think it’s best we go our separate ways.”
@@fancychancey9253 Yes. I can relate to your story a bit. The only times I have done the "goodbye speech" type thing to anyone was when I realized the friendship was extremely toxic and one sided. That type of speech is only usefull in such situations where you are 100% sure you want to never speak to them again and don't care if the reciever gets butthurt reading your message. But even so that womans message is even more cold than I ever talked to anyone. I always wrote the reason why I no longer want to be friend with them in DETAIL giving multiple examples, while all this woman did was just say "I'm not gonna tell you the reason I'm sorry if it's confusing". Yes it is confusing... Just tell the reason! If it's just a simple example of friends falling out of touch there's no reason to do a goodbye speech lol. Cuz there's always a chance you can find time down the line to start hanging out again, but maybe just not so often. Maybe you can call eachother on the phone if you live far away and visit eachother once a year? You can find time for people if you want to, no one is busy literaly 24/7. That woman just want to burn every friendship bridge she has and make sure they never contact her ever again lol, that's how you lose all your friends but that's none of my business.
@@fancychancey9253 I still think there are better ways of phrasing it than the person in the tiktok did, even more so if the friend just can't be phased out because clearly they're not getting the hint and probably won't settle for something vague. Just be honest an say what they're doing is really hurtful and that you don't feel like they treat you like a friend should so you've made the decision that you don't want to be involved with them before. Explaining why you're 'terminating' a friendship can also be a healing moment for YOU - you get to finally say why their treatment of you is hurtful without having to be afraid of it sullying your friendship. It allows the person ending the friendship to gain back some of their power and autonomy.
That being said, I do think that that woman's example speech is a good example of a wider discussion that is happening around the commodification of friendships. Due to things like 'emotional labour' and 'trauma dumping' being injected into the common vernacular through short-form content such as tiktoks without the adequate time to explain the concepts, people have started thinking of friendships as a purely transactional commodity, which is also why language that resembles something out of a HR manual (a context in which people are treated more as tools for a company than as human beings) has creeped in.
I didn’t even talk to my old friends when I cut ties with them. I just straight up ghosted them and tbh I regret doing that to one of them because she deserved an explanation. One of them rarely talks to the friend group in the first place, so it was a natural separation. The other one was toxic and verbally abusive. I couldn’t talk to her without her lashing out at me. Every time I tried to comfort her through her grief (she’s had lots of loved ones die during covid/senior year), she would berate me for not “comforting her right”. And she expected me to know how to comfort her because she thought we were similar (she flat out told me that). Not only that, but when whenever I mentioned crushes, she hated it. She once went into a rant how she would’ve harmed one of my crushes. I eventually found out she had a crush on me since 8th grade. I only have one friend now and I’m fine with that.
Ha ha... The friendship therapist reminds me of the videos where people tell you how to speak passive aggressive in corporate lingo 🤣🤣🤣
tbf if a friend was trying to 'break up' and they told me "I get that it might be hard to understand" or "I'm sorry if this feels painful and confusing" I think that would give me the boost of spite I need to just laugh in their face. 😫 So maybe there's some merit to what she's saying lol
There's nothing wrong with either of those sentences tho, in fact they were the only good part of that tiktok
As an autistic person, I feel like those sentences are good, because it acknowledges the other person's emotions. It also is direct, open and honest which are my forms of communication, and unfortunately a lot of people aren't willing to be direct, open, honest and are intimidated by me.
You'd feel spite because they told you they don't want to be friends anymore and then proceed to laugh in their face? Is that what friends do these days or do you just react immaturely to someone maturely addressing their feelings?
@@_n_a-ez5pc It's just the way it's worded that's the problem. The first phrase reeks of condescension and the second is akin to saying "I'm sorry IF I hurt your feelings." It's just empty and bizarre and yeah if someone I considered a friend said either of those to me, I would have no problem with ending the friendship 👍
@@Anonymous-bi5pv It's corporate lingo. It makes the whole thing sound condescending as heck - particularly when it's coming from someone who doesn't usually talk like that.
Obviously there can be exceptions (it really takes knowing the person to decide how to appropriately respond), but when someone starts talking to you like this out of the blue one day, spite isn't all that illogical. Nobody likes their friend talking at them like a disappointed boss. Friends aren't bosses!
The lady hurt my soul, because I ended a friendship with my ex-friend for talking down to me like that to "correct" my behavior that upset him while being vague and making his issue everybody’s issue.
Good thing you ended the friendship
I'm really sure my sister started watching those friendship TikToks. She was talking to our family about a friend of hers who was distancing herself and the way she talked about it was really similar to the TikTok you showed us. I made fun of her for pretty much proposing a contract to determine if the friendship would stay on and of course she got mad.
💀💀💀💀
Sometimes people are looking for answers to anything, it’s never so simple to dismiss it so perhaps get to the root of the problem and see if there is a way for her to communicate with her friend what she is worried about. You can walk her all you like, but at least you know in someway that she’s just trying to find some answers, even if the sources are not the best.
@Crickets I think that’s very fair. Answer and boundaries should be taught. I wish that there was more sources available out there for young people to access.
Making fun of her way of addressing the situation would make me mad too. She was trying to make peace and put out a suggestion to see if the friendship would continue and you thought "hey this is funny" and decided to laugh at her? Wow. People have different communication styles and address matters in a way that let's her see if things would work out visually on paper. Should she laugh at you for your way of doing things? Instead be understanding and try to find ways you can support her or learn how to cope with these things in a healthy way. I agree with @Crickets here in the comments.
Reply to n. If you have siblings then you already know how it is, say something that's a bit ridiculous, like a "message me x amount of times a week" friendship contract, and you'll get made fun of. Even more so when our youngest brother is 25 and she is the oldest one, we're not teens who don't know how to make/keep relationships (apparently she is tho). Still, us making fun of her doesn't mean we didn't have her feedback and how we deal with stuff later.
Not disagreeing with the other replies, in fact I like their take. Only yours seemed dumb to me in how no one would laugh at it.
When I had this problem this is how I handled it:
I’ve been feeling left out for months, so first I decided to give them a chance to speak for themselves, maybe I was thinking too much of it, maybe they were just minding their own issues, maybe they genuinely were busy, etc.
I engaged with them and invited them everywhere, maybe they were feeling just like me, so I took it upon myself to meet up and have fun. Things still felt weird.
I told them how I felt for the last months, how I felt like they were purposefully not telling me stuff and they were ignoring my opinions, how I felt a shift in their interaction with me. After 5 years friendships grow closer, not farther apart, so I told them. I got told I was paranoid and imagining things, I felt like, again, my opinions were indifferent to them.
So I told them I didn’t like the vibe and that I would distance myself.
Not a single one of them (a group of 6 people) contacted me to check on me, or try to fix things so I assumed I was right and kept going with my life.
Im not someone else’s leftover. I’m not a second thought, I refuse to be with people who don’t want to be with me.
It was hard, I felt so miserable, but I didn’t disrespect myself for "friends" who didn’t care about me like I cared for them.
It’s been about 5 years. I reconnected with some people with who, for life circumstances, we did distance ourselves, and I’m very happy. I reconnected with people who actually thought about me they same way I did for them ❤
Good for you! 😊
This right here is how to handle ending a friendship. Good on you for knowing your boundaries and handling the situation with respect!
I wish I were you…when I had this problem I gave everyone the silent treatment because I needed to feel my feelings without being rude but when they tried to confront me they were super rude so I told them to f off lol
I’m similar in that a friendship of 6 friends all ended for me at once. It was a long time ago, I may have been a toxic friend, but nonetheless it was very traumatic and still impacts my relationships to this day. And that was 6 years ago.
@@SimonaBerr everyone has a pace, the goal is to be able to acknowledge when something is wrong and if it’s out of your control kinda trick yourself into not caring too much. Because that brings peace of mind, some people need to constantly fail and hit walls to "wake up" and some people with a single bad experience they learn, doesn’t matter which one you are as long as you always understand you have the control over yourself and how you act. It is achievable (I come from heavy trauma so I learned to put to practice this and emotional disconnection really young, 15. Also this happened to me at 24 with people my age, so understand this can happen at any age)
This sounds like a breakup of two therapists, not normal people.
i treasured this season of friendship, i hope we can get to hang out again next season
How did they answer? Find out right after this commercial break!
Me: I’m an introvert, and sometimes don’t know how to sound like a real person.
My therapist: Try this, “I value our season of friendship…”
Me: Um…I don’t think real people talk like that either.
LOL that’s so funny!
Also for some reason ppl in the comments here are saying that it sounds genuine and is a good thing to say… so weird! I didn’t expect ppl here to be defending it. Especially when it’s pretty obvious that people don’t talk like that
Ngl that sounds really cheesy lol, I will never say that in real life
@@RaspBerryPies I mean, I grew up making fun of the dialogue in movies and TV, and then I visited the US and people just spoke like that lol. It's possible this might be some kind of culture clash... or the people thinking this is good advice just don't go outside often.
It’s like if you’re a middle age European nobles daughter writing a flowery letter but not a real one in a novel written by someone who’s never actually read actual middle age nobles letter.
Sometimes it’s better that friendships drift apart without a direct confrontation…just depends on the situation
Yeah, a friendship “breakup” isn’t really necessary if you both drift apart naturally but might be a good idea if a friend is still very invested but you’re no longer feeling the same way for whatever reason. It’s not as common but it does happen.
“People aren’t just npcs in your life. You can’t just say whatever to make yourself feel better without any consequences”.
That’s how my bf broke up w me, saying that our relationship was last season and they’re moving onto to a new arc and characters LMFAOOOOO
If any of my friends decided to end their friendship with me like that therapist recommended, I’m screaming in their face.
Fr, someone talking down to me like I'm a child in such a patronizing manner is a great sure fire way to start a fight. We gonna throw hands.
My god the last one is literally my dad. He spent years working on our villa. He thinks that everything must be earned in some way. In the end he found himself with more debts than anything and he didn't let us (me and my mom) even have a holiday or go outside our region.
“I don’t wanna disappoint your expectations”
I think you just created a new category of how to disappoint somebody, I’m just in awe tbh
the throwaway "body builders in their weeb phase" line is so real, i didnt realize how many gym bros were hardcore love live oshis until a few months ago. they all seem to love ayumu specifically... yume e no ippo is really helping them get those gains and i cant even be mad abt it
They're so real for that because I also love ayumu and listen to her songs when I'm working out
Yume e no ippo does wonders for getting those gains (source: trust me)
Ayumu-pyon
Nice to hear nico isn't relevant anymore
"I'd rather be ghosted." I laughed at that for about 15 minutes.
that guy giving advice with plant vs zombies music in the background, i know what hes up to... investing in ugly homes...spending thousands on landscaping to fight the zombies...i see you sir
Gotta be honest, i feel like slowly drifting apart and "I've enjoyed our season of friendship" are two opposite extremes of not handling ending friendships well.
There's no way to end a friendship without hurt feelings on some level and you want the other person to not feel hurt long term so i get the logic of slowly pulling away from them. But if they ever ask "hey I notice you've been distant lately, is something going on" then are you just supposed to lie to them till they get the message you aren't interested. And that hurts worse for people who are invested in you and genuinely care about you as a person, because the best friendships grow stronger with time. Slowly pulling away, not responding as often, and when you do get back to them pretending nothing is wrong can leave the other person feeling like they're doing or have done something wrong to you.
I feel it's better and more respectful to be direct, tell a person you're not feeling things the same way and while you don't want to hurt them that you don't want to hang out with them anymore. Just not with a "season of friendship" line. Obviously there are exceptions like when the other person shows they're abusive or the type to not take rejection without retaliating, those you need to be careful of getting yourself out of for your own safety. But if you called a person a friend I feel you should respect them enough to give them a sense of finality with the friendship being done if you really aren't interested in them anymore.
Personally, I’d rather just tell you to your face or let you know ahead of time that I don’t wanna be your friend anymore. I remember “phasing someone out” before and it just made me feel so cowardly and made the other person feel worse because they didn’t know why I was phasing them out. I vowed to never ever to do that again which is why tell ppl now. Especially if we were rlly close, you deserve to kno why I no longer want you in my life. Because if I don’t say anything they’ll just keep wasting their time trying to reach out to me. Being honest and upfront is always best for everyone.
As an autistic person, i absolutely hate the "phasing out". To me its cowardly and a form of ghosting. Please let me know directly if you have issues.
@@straberryshinigami15g97 I don’t think I have autism (I might have it cause it’s in my family but idk) but i completely agree!!
From the bottom of my heart, I would MUCH prefer to be ghosted lol. That weird sterile language would live in my head for so long. Like just laying in bed at night like “what…. was that…” And I would feel so stressed trying to figure out how to respond in the moment during the conversation. I’d have no idea what was expected from me. Like “okay…??? thank… you…?? I’m sorry… about the season???” I can feel the anxiety just thinking about it lmao. Ghost me, or if they need closure, just send me a big text telling me what I did wrong and say bye forever.
@@BabyBear046 obviously if they were your close friend they wouldn’t use sterile language like they mentioned in the video. I, personally, wouldn’t. I’ve told people I didn’t want to be friends with them without using that language. Maybe you just can’t handle confrontation 🤷♀️
Edvasian, you made me die laughing when you said instead of 3 meals a day sometimes it's just a slice of cheese and a dream. 😭😭😭 I imagined that video of the rat sadly eating alone and then Edvasian sleeping in his bed imagining a banquet.
Legit, even putting investing the money aside, I could live quite comfortably with the million dollars.
EASILY. 1. buy a house in cash and pay off our debts (cars, credit cards). 2. put the rest in savings. That would free up $2.5k/ month to now be disposable income and we'd still have a massive savings account for future emergencies/retirement.
I'd buy a few apartments and rent them out
the first 10 seconds was the most parasocial moment I've ever truly felt. I haven't had water all day and was thinking about my neck aching when he mentioned drinking water. I laughed so hard thinking "oh fuck he's right" then drank some water
Here is your yearly reminder to drink some water
You have such a pleasing voice and manner of speech. I love the sarcasm sprinkled throughout too.
Oh god that lady really pissed the hell out of me. My ex whom I very much loved and adored told me something similar in that exact same tone, after he cheated on me. Like THE AUDACITY!!!! I'd much rather just he ghosted me out of shame than being told he wants the best for me and what we did (cheating on me) is the best for me 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Oh man… if you have never broken up with a toxic friend, then you don’t know what it’s like. Lol it really comes down to talking to them as if you are in HR because no other way actually works. It’s the clean break away that leaves them no room to yell back at you as if you did something wrong. Fighting them makes them happy, ignoring them makes them angry and you can’t win unless you sound like a politician.
I feel you, i have meet people like that that would step my boundaries and act offended when i try to be nice, they could not learn in a nice way.
Could if been a form of narcissism with your x friend.
I would literally just ignore them for the rest of eternity. If forced to respond, it would be something like “ok” or “neat”.
100% this. Do not give them room to argue or debate. It's over and done PERIOD.
@@BabyBear046 unless you’re the type of person that responds like that normally. I had one where she would deliberately push my buttons to get me upset, and then I called her out in it and she would go “whatever helps you sleep at night”, I swear to god if i hear that phrase again i am about to strangle whoever says it and then myself
I feel like the biggest issue with 'therapy speak' is that the idea is you can stop someone from having negative reactions to what you're saying as long as you phrase it in a sterile enough way. If you're ending a friendship, it's going to be a bit of a rough time for you both. You can't avoid their emotions with any amount of HR speak. Sometimes you have to just let be people be angry or sad instead of trying to proactively avoid it.
Yay, realistic relationship goals! I am glad to be your acquaintance through our shared friend of TH-cam 🥰👌
The friendship bit reminds me of this time in middle school when one of my friends got a bunch of her friends together and announced that she had made a list of all of her friends and she was going to have to evaluate us and decide who she needed to stop being friends with to be more popular. We just laughed at her
great points about the friendship stuff but i just wanted to remind the audience that outgrowing people (even those who were your friends) is completely normal, specially if you’ve gone through traumatic stuff (talking from personal experience). maybe you shouldn’t tell them about it like the woman on that tiktok video but i think you know the drill
i had a person friend dump me and it sounded like this and then 10 paragraphs of condescension. it turned like 10 years of my feelings toward them sour entirely so at least it’s a complete break lmfao
I came to an end of a 'season of friendship' recently and my way was to wait for a chance to tell him he's the biggest nag I've ever known in my life
I'd respect your honesty way more than whatever bs that lady was doing. Like if you're gonna criticize me at least make it constructive. Nag is something that can be worked on so at least you gave them the opportunity to do so by making them aware of it & also serving them the consequences of thier nagging actions which will hopefully make him more inclined to work on it & if not, then you gave him room in his life for people who accept him as he is. Probably the most optimal turn out there could be in these situations bc nobody was fake or coddled.
saw someone say that Therapy Speak is used to keep discussions between you and your therapist objective and impersonal, which is why it sounds so strange when people suggest using it around people you actually like
I'd treasure the season of a million dollars that guy gave me.
People talk loud when they want to act smart right?
CORRECT!!!
I just put a load of laundry in the washer, made myself some food and sat down to watch this so HA! That intro didn't get me!
…. You should have posted an hour or two earlier when I was slumped over in bed.
Productive day 😊
good for you.
Thank you, it feels good!
I am pretty sure the music playing while that guy was shouting bad job advice was the tune that would play when you took your Nintendog out for a walk.
job interview advice casually leaves out the fact that HR is the most unpredictable hinderance to any job ever
This is an old comment ik but I wanna hear your stories now so bad
The nintendogs music w the loud guy got me like 😂😂😂
I still have my original copy of nintendogs dog walking theme somewhere. It survived going in the wash three times when I was a kid/teen.
Her video serves as a reminder that there are some TOXIC therapists out there
That intro was accurate. Also, nice hairstyle! 👍
"WHY DID I NOT GET THIS JOB AT THE LOCAL LIBRARY? I FOLLOWED THIS GUY'S ADVICE TO THE LETTER."
Sometimes when I'm sad, I remember your channel exists & have a good laugh over your sarcastic remarks & chill personality. Thank you for existing, my guy✨
Ed, I've treasured our season of my subscribing to your channel....and I'm excited for season 2!
The yelling guy is correct for corporate jobs. I have LITERALLY gotten call backs because of that. Maybe it's different outside of California but it's super competitive here and most apps are rubber stamp rejected by an algorithm. Definitely do not use all caps tho 😭
Protip: If someone is selling you the method to get rich, YOU are the method.
The people who sell these courses piss me off so badly. They talk fast, sound convincing, and drain the wallets of those sucked in by their crap while giving the most generic advice and nothing of value
Using corporate language and making such complicated answers is a huge red flag. If you answer like this on a job interview, how surprised everyone would be when you are hired and act nothing like this.
Completely unrelated to lying on the internet, but I hope Ian and Elle make a comeback soon. I’d love to know what they’ve been up to ❤
Ian and Elle my ults 😭❤️ I miss them so much
Ella?
Who are they?
@@baebaeluvsu they’ve been on the channel before
@@tinyprettymoon Are they actual human beings or just characters made by him
I think this woman actually thinks it sounds kind because it's "worked through" and honest, with the idea that being honest and open with your feelings always is best
I wouldnt call this stuff chronically online, but more along the lines of corporations in human skin trying to appeal to real people.
I always thought chronically online being too in the current online sauce? Expecting everyone else to be equally up to date and invested in the most useless drama(or such), that has no bearing beyond the niche(or not so niche) corner of the internet they inhabit?
I dont know. Thats how i was explained the thing
That dude is assuming I get an email telling me I failed the job interview in the first place. In my experience, that doesn't usually happen...
I was learning soft skills in my teen years and during an interview I leaned in and the interviewer thought I was trying to flirt with him. Cultural mish mash is wonderful. Not everything you read in a book is going to work out.
6:09 Me and my friend actually do think our relationship in seasons lol. She was there for a season and a half before moving away for a bit. She’ll be back in season 4 though. It’s also because i just wear the same outfit everyday, and the moment i switch that outfit (like once every few months) that marks a new season.
I’m currently in the season of watching edvision. But who knows what next season brings
That guy with the real estate advice had me dying of laughter 😂😂😂 good thing I’m at work at the emergency room. He’s really serious with his content and the comments don’t correlate with his messaging. Lol
I really treasure your seasonal content
9:56 im glad agent 47 has found a new career path, hope it works out for him!
I have treasured my season of watching this video, but as I approach the 15 second outro I can feel my brain that has been absolutely fried by short form content clawing it’s way out of its skull prison. I appreciate the opportunity to watch this video and look forward to the future development of my short attention span and my desperate need for instant gratification.
2:26 "forgetting to take care of your health" really speaks to me haha. not sleeping, eating and drinking enough while you work on your laptop in school isnt gonna do you any good. Y'all please take care, eat a balanced diet and drink enough water and please get enough rest and if you look at the screen a lot, remember to take screen breaks. I know it isn't easy to do that, cos I can barely do it myself, that's why my teacher called the ambulance on me and I sat confused on the floor throwing up last week. But maybe I was still weak from my cold and stress. But like, listen to your body when it tells you you're tired or get a headache, take a break and eat and drink something. Stay safe!
That second video reminds me of those loud ass commercials that would come on in the middle of the night and wake you up out your sleep when you forgot to turn the TV off 🤣
That season of friendship sure had passed lol
"Did yo know your headache is because you've been staring at your phone for 3 hours without drinking anything"
Can you imagine the EXALTED SMUGNESS I felt when this is the first video I watched upon getting home from 2hrs gym+liter of water while there?
13:31 as a real estate agent I can confirm that is not how houses work 👍
“a few slices of cheese and a dream.” 😅
7:47 Lmao it’s so hilarious all what you said before this because I was thinking EXACTLY, “This is how I sound when I explain to my therapist why I still haven’t reconnected with or made friends.” 💀
What u said at first is true 100%🙂and I had back pain too
that guy said 📣📢📣📢📣📢📣📢📣📢📣
2:46 - oh so your real name is Edwin
Everything you say should be true but not everything that is true should be said, some thoughts are for YOU and YOU alone.
Very close....*drinks water* im horribly dehydrated.
I had a friend "breakup" with me once. He said something like too many people want to hangout with him and so he doesn't have any time for me. It was one of the most hurtful things I've ever heard. When an SO breaks up with you, you can be like "Maybe she doesn't see us working out in 10 years." When a friend breaks up with you in favor of numerous other friends it's kinda like they don't like you on any level.
I was thinking of applying for new jobs. It’s been awhile since I’ve went through an interview. I’ll definitely raise my voice now, thanks!
9:00 I can tell you never woked at either of those places because neither McDonald's nor retail stores are a chill place to work at.
This is the best video I’ve ever seen about the internet. After this video I’m deleting TH-cam.
Did you, though?
almost, just a headache and its been FIVE hours. 😤
The "finance guy" from like 11:45 onward sounds like he has his teeth glued together with chewing gum when he speaks. I would definitely take the 1 million in a heartbeat.
after he was taloking about volume, this kroger ad just destroyed my eardrums when this middle ages white soccer mom sounding ladyscreamed about some fresh producs
Ngl the guy who gives you interview tips is really helpful, defo helped me get a job at the company I wanted. Though its defo for a coporate job
rude of that tiktoker to deliver the sad friendship season finale news without asking first if the other person is in the right headspace to receive that information :(((
Best comment lmao
Imo, this one is more respectful than saying “oh I just don’t fw you anymore.” 😂😂😂😂😂 I just think that honest communication is a lot better than just being a hot mess
That friend breakup video stumps me. If a friend talked to me like that I’d be confused and hurt.
no my back pain and dehydration are chronic, and the only way I can cope about being bedbound is by going online lol. you got it backwards in my case. it pisses me off people take their health for granted so much.
ive "phased someone out" before and wont ever do it again bc yeah they felt bad & i felt bad but it also made them victimize THEMSELVES even tho there was a clear reason i phased them out which was them 👎🏻
😂 your facial expressions are spot on. You are a handsome young man.
I too treasure this season of friendship
I had someone do that first thing to me- with the weirdly clinical language and all that exactly like the skit and it broke me. Don’t do it. Just don’t
Bye my friend literally did that boss break up thing with me like she was ending some kinda business deal 😂😂
I'm a well adjusted adult - I hope! - and I do NOT talk like that. It's hokey!
I've had many friendships in my life, some are still going on since elementary school, junior high, high school, and since meeting them in the 1990s, but other friendships were really just for a season. But they just faded away. We lost touch or what have you. None of us talked about things ending. They just ended. I think I might laugh if someone tried to end our friendship talking really hokey or like someone trying to fire me nicely. *eye roll*
This was put really well. I see it the same way. Maybe it's just because I move a lot and job hop a lot, but MOST of my relationships end sooner than we would expect, just because of material circumstances. So the idea of someone ending something formally in this way just feels goofy to me.
@@zenleeparadise you said it well, too.
I have valued our season of friendship is my new status everywhere forever now.
edvasian, your hair is BOMB today! when i need a laugh i just binge your videos
when he said "how close was I?" I immediately took a gulp of water
I love you hair in this video!!!
A few slices of cheese and a dream = what a great name for a band 😁