@coleworldcole9438 no, thankfully not. This is just advice to try and get people to get a better life. I literally hate the type of people that go around and tell other people they have to get married and a house and stocks/children/fancy cars/ you name it. It's just another one of these ancient expectations that puts even more pressure on people that are not doing well.
That or the typical phonk/bass boosted music with grey color scheme saying to cut everything out of your life. This just feels wholesome and genuine, a great way to start 2025 lads
It reminds me of something Daniel Sloss said. It was along the lines of "this isn't coming from me being on some high horse, this is coming from a man who fell off his horse"
2024 was the worst year in my life. Getting divorced, lost my kids, about to go bankrupt, turned 40 yesterday; it's felt like my life has been falling apart at every turn. I'm doing everything I can to try to keep it together. This came at exactly the right time to get me out of a bad funk. I'm taking this to heart, getting after it, putting in that work. Thanks James, thanks Speeed, love you guys.
Hey, you got this! In 2018 I was getting divorced, I had my kids every other weekend, had so much debt I'd have a panic attack whenever I got groceries, and was thinking about ending it all. Fast forward to now and I have an amazing wife, I have my kids half the time, and my mental health is so much better. Chaos can be a catalyst to reevaluate your life and make some positive decisions, and take you on the best paths you never knew existed. You got this!
keep pushing homie, there's always a way. I'm in my mid 30s and had a couple bad years recently so I feel you. My dumb ass leaned on fictional characters I grew up with to keep me going, it was ridiculous but it worked because I'm doing so much better. Would Goku give up? Fuck no lol
As a 35 year old functioning alcoholic I just finished a bag of nerds gummy clusters. This video both shocked me awake, and made me tear up. I wish you knew James how much you carried me through covid and depression. I'm so happy that you're working on yourself, I hope I can do the same for me.
you can get there. getting sober is so much better you're not going to believe how much more you're going to like life when you stick with it. setbacks will happen, just talk to others, find what works for you. you can do it
Hey my guy. 12 years ago I was you. Find the things that are holding you down and cut them out. For me it was a toxic marriage I was medicating through, but some people just have a bad relationship with the bottle. I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you the light at the end of the tunnel is real. Head there, we're waiting for you.
James, i orignally subbed to this channel purely to support you, with the intent of not watching too much because it wasnt about cars. I have since watched every single video and love all of it. Your "assume you like things" rings completely true. Keep doing you man, youre fuckin cool.
Thanks for sharing James. I'm 2 years sober, this video really hit home. Getting your sh!t together in your 30's is better than in your 40's, it's never too late to take the next right step.
Congratulations on doing so well at giving up booze. My dad's side of my family are/were raging alcoholics. I have both Irish and Scottish blood in my veins. If I would drink a Guinness, guaranteed I'd end up in a fight. So from my early twenties I stopped drinking and replaced it with weed. You don't want to fight when you're on weed. In fact you don't want to do anything while entertaining Mary Jane. I have pretty much been stoned for the last 30 years and have wasted my life being stoned. It's now been 5 days that I haven't toked. I feel better for it, more coherent, more eloquent and definitely not as foggy in the brain department. It's only five days, but it's a step in the right direction.
Sobriety has changed so much for me. I wasn't even that much of a fuckup any more when I decided to quit. That being said, I was still enough of a fuckup that I had to decide to not be a fuckup. You can always get better
The throw away joke of "have my dad be alive" levelled me. Like such a incredibly serious point - death of a family member can absolutely wreck someone. I would give anything to hug my dad again.
Completely agree. I think the real lesson there is to “cherish your relationships with people you love”. Don’t take these for granted. Call your mom. Call your dad. Call your kids. One day you’ll wake up and they may be gone. Forever.
This channel feels like going for a beer with your favorite high school teacher a few years later and having that real and honest talk about life and I'm here for it
i’m so sorry for your loss i’m am not to usually comment on youtube videos but thought not exactly the same my uncle just passed away 3 weeks before Christmas and also both my grandparents as we’ll I hope God give us both the strength to make them proud of us up in heaven and the virtue that well see them in the eternal kingdom, stay strong brother as I try too as well
@@Omniverse0 I'm sorry that you couldn't grasp it on your first go, but it's a little deeper than that. It's alluding to the fact that (large) tasks can seem unmanageable and that rather than overwhelming yourself with it, you should break it down and start somewhere; doesn't matter where, just that you begin the process, which is often the hardest part. Talk about eyerolling... 🙄
@Omniverse0 being stuck in a depressed funk sucks, and it can lead to full blown MDD. Cleaning has helped me more than anything. Start small and just keep trying to build on it
We need to stop saying this shit and stop holding people to such a high standard. Not anything against James, but we should focus more on what is being said rather than who is saying it. This whole parasocial concept of making someone a hero is absurd to me. Sorry if this came off strange, just wanted to blurt this out. With all that said, great video and great advice throughout!
In a world of Andrew Tates we need more content like this. James it has been such a pleasure watching you over the years. I think I was like 16 or 17 when I started watching Donut. I thought you guys were the coolest. I'm 22 now and have been feeling the need for self improvement and you are such a fantastic role model. Thanks for making videos my guy. Happy New Year.
This is honestly exactly what I needed to see today. I paused the video on number 5, got up and cleaned, didn't come back until I was done. 7 and 5 done
Something that helped out my mental health a ton was thinking "This thing isnt for me" instead of "This thing sucks" because I used to always be mad about random garbage when i was in high school, infinitely happier and more relaxed now.
I got engaged on Christmas, and after 15 years of detailing for someone else I’m finally going to start my own business. I needed this video, Thank you James.
find someone who can get jobs for you if you are doing mobile detailing and if you are getting your own place marketing is more important than anything else ! good luck my friend hope you achieve all your dreams
@@hawhaw6957 I’ll be doing a mixture of both. I’ve been doing side jobs for 2+ years now. Luckily I’ve acquired a handful of good customers over the years. I appreciate the advice, marketing is something I’m still learning!
@Thebuffingwizard: Congratz on getting engaged! Getting married is the best, but most difficult thing I've ever done, but it's definitely worth it. Hope the best for you and your business.
James, I’m about to turn 23, kinda lost with myself. I’m gonna give this a shot and see how this year changes from the last. Thank you bro, you’re very appreciated
Advice from someone who just turned thirty and is only just getting their shit together. Don't wait for it to be the right time to improve, do it now. If it sucks, it's hard, you're tired etc do it anyway. I thought I was invincible at 23, now I suffer the consequences of that ignorance 🤣
I was in a similar place at 22. I didn't know what I wanted to do but I knew I wasn't happy. My then girlfriend, now wife, suggested I look into the community college. Now, I'm a powersports technician working on motorcycles, jetskis, snowmobiles, ATVs, and side by sides. It helped me also to create a list of the types of work I knew I liked. For example: working with my hands, figuring out issues on systems, working primarily by myself, but okay with others as required. This isn't to say to make a hobby your job because then it's not a hobby anymore. This is more of a way to find work that you can feel more fulfilled.
I’m in the sxact spot spot as you. I’m about to turn 23 as well and have already started doing some of the things he listed before he posted it, and I can tell you from my experience it works. You’re going to look and feel noticeably better. Here’s to a fresh start!
I can totally relate to that. Maybe you can learn from my mistakes if you'd indulge me in my unsolicited advice. 23 was an incredibly tough year for me and was the beginning of a stretch of 5+ years that were largely "wasted". From the outside, I nearly had a picture perfect life at 23. I was in a long term relationship with my HS sweetheart, had a six figure engineering job, luxury apartment with friends all close by. However, my mental health was beginning to slide and I didn't adequately address it until far too late. I became very depressed and was too proud to admit to myself and to my gf/family. I was feeling lost because up to that point in my life the expectations and direction was pretty laid out for me (get good grades in high school to get an engineering degree and then a good job). I felt guilty about admitting I was depressed because I didn't have a "reason" to be, which I didn't recognize at the time was the definition of depression. I had discussions with my gf about marriage and she was adamant about waiting at least another 2-3 years (this would have been about 8 years into us dating). My job was great and had a prestigious title but was extremely stressful due to the learning curve and expectations for this particular industry. My personality is one that I will always strive to do my best and produce high quality work/output no matter what it was. I began to lose confidence at work because of how intelligent my coworkers were and how seemingly impossible it would be to get to their level, I was getting discouraged in my relationship just "waiting" to get married, and I was getting lost in my personal direction without having a set game plan. All these factors together led to me becoming more socially distant because after work, all I wanted to do was "relax" and hangout at my apartment. My mental health deteriorated and I became depressed, although I didn't truly recognize it for what it was because I thought I was too strong for that. I began to take kratom which is a legal, plant that affects your opiate receptors in your brain. This made me feel great... Too great. I became addicted to kratom and other less common opiates that wouldn't pop a drug test. My gf was staunchly anti-drug so I was afraid of telling her. She would find my stashes, we would fight, make up, then repeat. I was afraid to own up to my addiction, I was scared to admit that I couldn't handle it on my own. We broke up after 10 years of dating since freshman year hs which sent me into a deeper spiral. I wasted nearly all of my 20s in addiction and depression. It wasn't until I turned 30 that I made a commitment to myself that something had to change. Kicked the drugs, started eating better (I had gained 50+ lbs over my 20s and got back to my college weight at 31), started working out more and forcing myself to be more social. It's still a struggle to find a healthy balance between taking time for myself as an introvert, and making time to spend with family and friends. I never regret it afterwards, I just have to get over the metal block the couple days before about how I don't want to do it. Staying organized and having personal goals has been huge for me. I need something to work towards so I don't feel like I'm just floating through life. Sadly that took me way too long to figure out but at least things are better now. If you're feeling lost, try to be brutally honest with and ask yourself why that is, or what the root of that feeling is. Then identify what would make that issue go away and come up with an actionable plan to tackle it. Time goes by quickly as an adult so as long as you can make small, consistent changes every day/week/month by the time a couple years go by you'll be in a completely different space! Anyways, that's my 2 cents. Feel free to ignore haha but if you wanted someone to shoot the shit with just let me know.
I hit rock bottom in 2024. Had a worst breakup of all time with my ex, which eventually found out she had BPD. Moved to a new work environment that kinda not supportive and always looked down upon. Got a couple of major injuries like broken finger and torn muscle, and cannot perform daily run like I used to. And my mom passed away while I was out for work in another city. I had to endure all of this without the privilege to share to others, since I really don't have a supportive family and I'm doing everything myself to keep it together. Your video is not my bingo list, but I appreciate TH-cam recommends this. Thanks James, Thanks Speed, I really need this. I love you guys ❤
My mum commit sui--de a little over a year ago, one of the last conversations we had she told me i needed to get my steps up, i was 6'2 and 112kg so i started walking, 4km was all i could muster, but every single day i walked, gradually i increased how far i could walk, now i walk 6 to 10 kms every single day, rain ,hail or shine. I now weigh 87kg and can run without my knees screaming in pain. If i can do it, anyone can. Put your headphones on, put on some music or a podcast and go walk around your block or a nearby park. Your body and mental health will thank you. RIP mum.
@@__caramel_latte76__83 it's been a rough time. Just trying to carry on but I just wish I could have done more for her. She needed help and I should have known.
I was constantly 15 minutes late and hurrying everywhere until one day I told myself, just really look at how long things take, so I timed myself on everything. Now I know taking a shower and getting dressed takes 25 minutes, putting my shoes on and going and getting into my car takes 5 minutes, eating a quick meal takes 20 minutes, stopping to buy something takes 15 minutes, and for good measure leave 10 minutes in case something comes up, and if it doesn't that's fine because no one thinks it's weird to show up 10 minutes early anyway. Just making this tiny change to the way I plan my day has reduced my stress a ton, and now people even know me as the shows up exactly on time guy, and I'm proud of myself for that.
I love being late. I will never conform myself to be on time. I love trying to predict how much time I will spend on a task and get it wrong. It's when I run against time than I feel alive, I shine on being late, I found solution to all my problem and if not I lie about it. I freaking loveeee it.
The Art of Racing in The Rain is a perfect first book for the book club. It has cars, it has racing, and an emotional story about an owner and their dog.
I cant ever decide if you are gonna laugh or cry at times. Your face tells me tear up but your chuckle tells me laugh. Love the content m8. That's #11 on the board, "Don't hide your emotions!"
Hell yeah. I’m coming up on a year on the 11th. I’ve made it to a year a few times and then it usually falls apart but right now I’m genuinely feeling better than I ever have at any point in my life and I know that there are things I can do to make it even better (see: the list) but I’m just proud of where I’m at today. I’m looking forward to getting started with the rest of my life as a better person than I was yesterday.
@@SpeeedCo My dude! Congrats on making that change. I’ve been a fan for the past few years, and seeing you look healthy is a huge motivation. Thanks for sharing that being on time story…I needed some inspiration to keep the train rolling.
isn't it nice to not feel like shit everyday and not have to worry about dumb stuff you did? congrats,the longer you go the easier it gets, I quit drinking like 10 years ago and the nice thing is these days it's totally normal not to drink.
It’s crazy how much just that little bit helps. I’ma mechanic and wowee some jobs can be so overwhelming. I like to break it down to little jobs and goals to hit, certain bolts or parts to take off. And before ya know it, it’s all done
Bruh. I've been following you since the beginnings of Donut. I just had a heart attack like 3 weeks ago. I'm 34. This list is something I've been working on myself. When i first got better, i watched the episode of Stussy. And remembered you went through something similar. It gave me a lot of hope for me and the future. I'd rather it not happen, but I'm glad I'm able to not feel alone in this struggle. You are an inspiration, James.
I can relate to the hating. I used to hate anything new. New music, new movies, new games, etc. I realized at one point that all those people are trying to do is entertain me, and I'm shoving their work back in their face only because of my own stubbornness. It's a terrible way to live.
Perfectly curated list of things that 110% legit work. Remember, life isn't linear - the point of doing these things isn't to suddenly feel good exactly each and every time you do them, it's to develop and maintain a continuous sense of doing well that frees you to experience more of the good things you want without any of the bad and give you the resilience to take the bad without it knocking you down each time.
I've been trying to work on myself for years now. I got clean, sober and quit smoking. I started eating better and working out. I got my career back on track and have been studying to progress at my job. I got myself out of tens of thousands in debt and am now saving for a down payment on a house. I've been doing counselling and working on fixing my mental health issues. I've been learning about myself and why my mind is the way it is. Recently I've been questioning the point of it all. Sometimes that voice in your head isn't on your side. Learning to say no to yourself and stay on track is hard. Being okay with being uncomfortable means not picking up that bottle when things aren't going well. It means pushing through the pain to set a PR in the gym. And it means confronting the trauma that got me going on the wrong path in the first place. Everyday is a new day for change.
Im right there with you man, and proud of you! Personal growth is hard when you dont even know whats wrong to begin with, or why everything is the way it is. I'm learning everyday. Keep it up, just read other's struggles, journeys, and victories really does help ease the burden and relate to people you dont even know. I realize im not alone, and neither are you and were all struggling somewhere. This video and comment section is a breath od fresh air.
My dad used to tell me when I was procrastinating at doing something (literally anything), is "the best way to finish a job is to start it". I have lived by that ethos all my life and it it one thing that I use to give myself a kick up the butt to do the task now.
Thank you James. Something I have learned over the past like 5 years is that YOU SHOULD DO THINGS YOU'RE BAD AT. 5 years ago I couldn't ride a bike, I wasn't handy, I couldn't cook, I was fat, I had kidney stones at 20 years old, and I was awful at reading. Since then, I got really into cycling, became a bike tech, have cooked some of the best food I've ever ate in my life, lost 100 lbs, I drink a lot of water, and learned I am dyslexic BUT I'M BETTER AT READING. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I've wrangled up a decent career as a graphic designer with no degree because I'm good at what I do because I just keep pushing myself to get better at the things I'm not good at. Do things you're bad at!
Hes not attacking this from a place pf regret or feeling shitty for the past. Hes not trying to beat anybodu down for not doing these things and hes not wrapping it in a macho wrap of i have the keys to the world this is what more people need
A couple I will add: 1) Learn how you need to learn. Everyone learns differently, and it can be very nuanced (time, place, environmental conditions, visual, auditory, kinesthetic, data driven, formula driven, logical, emotional, etc.) Once you know HOW you learn, you'll learn new things far faster. 2) Every day/week/month/etc try to "move the ball forward." It's easy to get stuck doing routine sustainment activities (groceries, exercise, work, sleep, etc.) Plan activities that you regularly work on that actually move the ball forward. Things like working toward an advanced degree, working on a house or car project, researching something that'll help you make an important decision, learning a new subject, check on your retirement plan, etc.) You make life-changing progress when you remember to try and move the ball forward on a regular basis. 3) Build a [flexible] routine. Success isn't done overnight. It's the product of long-term small steps. The key to doing that well is having a routine. 4) If you REALLY want to learn or master something, develop a personal curriculum or plan. Focus less on repetitive practice and more on "deliberate practice." 5) Little gestures matter, but build the habit to do them. Try to look people in the eyes when thanking them. Write hand-written 'thank you' letters. Hold the door open for people. Things like that. Good books I'd suggest: "The Power of Habit" and "Talent is Overrated." Those two books will completely change how you approach life.
If you want to remember something, read it, say it out loud, and write it down. It’s now stored in three interconnected places in your brain. I learned that from a roommate in college. It works.
As an engineer, figuring out how stuff works is part of my lifestyle, and it’s SOOO helpful in daily life. Not just mechanical stuff, but stuff like “how does the stock market work?”, “how is my food made?”, or “how do elections work?” Just getting a cursory understanding of how the world works goes miles toward developing empathy for others and forming your own opinions rather than be spoon-fed social media clickbait.
Please be the one TH-camr that makes a video just because you want to regardless of what us, the viewers think of it. There's literally so much stuff I've learnt from you and the sheer randomness of your content. I want a vintage Leica now cause of that one video and a quirky European hatchback. Keep doing what you're doing bro❤LOOOVE IT
Me personally 2024 was no doubt a tough year for me mentally. But from doing things like going on for a walk, limiting time on my phone, and valuing time with friends has helped me out a lot. I don’t believe that being an avid gym goer and book reader alone will solve everything in one’s life, but doing the small steps can make a huge difference in having the mental clarity to go through the chaos in life. Everyone will go on a different mountain path to where they need to be. EVERYONE. 💪
I dont normally comment but here I go: I have been struggling with weed and alchohol and I’ve been starting to turn it around. Some of these lessons I have already learned, even the uncomfortable one but I had both forgotten and gotten to cozy in chasing the dopamine. Hearing about your health, both socially and with your body, especially the drinking drugs and unhealthy food, is great inspiration. I’ll prob come back and watch this again when I’m getting that wave of feeling like shit to pass. I’ve loved you for your cars, jokes, videos, and now your life take. Love you James from someone you won’t ever meet
Start changing your habits. Do hobbies. It’s a great struggle but fill your time with constructive things that will make you work to get to that next level. Don’t drown in your own sorrows till you… love yourself. You can come back from anything you put your mind to!!
"It's not a party if it happens every night". Find a hobby/hobbies(for me it's video games) to keep yourself out of trouble. Smoking weed is fine but you shouldn't be stoned 24/7, I usually wait until around dinner time at least when I'm done with everything for the day.
I dont comment either, but this video has complled me. Im quiting both of those rn too. And trying to get real dopamine. Its hard to even acknowledge the real issues at the core. So props to you man! You can do it! My book club recommendation was Mind Hacking by Sir John Hargrave. Nobody will seee it but i highly recommend it if you are struggling to do or improve anything in life. Its funny and not at all pretentious or serious. Good luck to you sir!
I’m 23 and am getting my stuff together. Finishing college, started a business, and got engaged. But all of these things that are I have learned or you just taught me that are genuinely beneficial to my life. Especially the “due the little things now.” It saves sooooo much stress in the long run
Giving up drinking is one of the biggest things I've told people can change your life for the better. I drank every day for almost 8 years, totally roasted my 20s. I turn 30 next year and it'll be my 3rd year sober. I can't imagine being even half the man, son, or husband I am now, hitting the beers and bottle like I used to. It allowed so much more life to open up when I wasn't spending 2/3 of the day either foggy or hungover. Your final point is absolutely what that habit manifested from and it's crazy to hear someone else identify it like that. Big ups for this dude.
Good job! Thats amazing and in my opinion the best thing one can do to make his life better. Took me far to long to realize it however. I am starting my 3rd year sober also.
Love how the vibe of video is to lift people up. No negativity, no talking down on other people. Just helpful advice that you're sharing. Solid video James
Why is this the first self help message that has ever resonated with me? James, time and time again you inspire us. Thank you. From a thirty something year old that needed a list.
I don't cry a lot, but listening to your realizations made me do some reflecting too. So you made me cry today, and I'm okay with that. Thank you James!
As a notorious deadline screw up your table read story sends shivers down my spine. Most people have to retake a test or reschedule for being late, but this is a whole different thing.
Best piece of advice that changed my life was from a Chaplain. He said something along the lines of, if you aren't uncomfortable, you can never grow. Pretty much, if you never push yourself or try to avoid things, you will stagnate. Or kind of like, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. You might go through difficult times in life or have to struggle through certain things, but it will make you a better, tougher, more resilient person.
Dude this video hits hard. I suffer from an extreme form of PTSD from my work. I’m not able to work, I will never go back to my previous job and I suffer minute to minute, hour to hour. I try to approach each day by looking forward to the next 10 mins of the day, reset and keep pushing forward. A lot of the time I feel so lonely but when I see videos such as this one, it really puts into perspective that I am not alone. It’s comforting. Learning to love and live in the uncomfortably is key! Thank you so much James for putting out a video to which others can relate. Means so much to people suffering and trying to find their path in life. Thank you!!
This video was pretty awesome. I feel like I got to see a lot of the steps of your journey and while they may not be perfect for everyone, it is all about finding out what to do on the journey. Love love love your inspiration and positivity!
From one James to another, thank you. Love you dude. These are all things I've started doing in the last year and a half or so, and holy moly it's changed my life in immeasurable ways. And it all started with "Be ok being uncomfortable", which meant confronting the things I didn't like about my life and myself, to acknowledge that I need to change, and do the hard uncomfortable work to improve them. Things I definitely wish I started doing 10 years ago. But now I'm healthier, happier, more productive, more confident, and more successful than ever. If only after 1.5 years, imagine where I'll end up as I continue in 5 years. 10 years. 50 years. Holy moly.
This was a great and thoughtful list. I’m in my 40’s now and can confirm these are definitely important. I’d like to add one more. Find good friends, and do your utmost to nurture those friendships. Be there for them when they need you, and keep in touch with them often. This is two fold. We’re seeing so many younger people opting out of time out with friends, or going to a happy hour, or just general involvement with other people that it’s truly become an epidemic. I myself am guilty of this, I work full time remote, and my company is halfway across the country. While I am married with children I don’t have many people I can just pick up the phone and talk to, so I’ve made a change to volunteer places, and meet people I otherwise never would have. Relationships make the world go round✌️
Can confirm that eating better makes a huge difference. When I got married, my diet changed from chicken nuggets and the like to actually home cooked meals, most from scratch, *with veggies in each meal*. I felt like I ate the same amount of food, but I lost 10 lb in less than a year.
@@SpeeedCo I feel like you're the first showhost to allow yourself to be soo vulnerable and not put on a facade. You're deliberately putting yourself out there with the intention of helping others. No.1. Thanks for sharing
I don't expect that you'll read this, but the best thing that happened to you (from my perspective) was setting out on your own to make Speeed. This video, and this channel, are so much more than car content. This video is genuinely one of the best collections of advice I've ever seen. I will be sending it to anyone who needs it (and asks...). Happy new year!
The last tip #1 is similar to seek discomfort from yes theory. I’d recommend them if this resonated with people. Great message to be uncomfortable and find new experiences through it
Don't feel bad if you're ADHD, OCD, depressed, autistic, dyslexic, disabled, or whatever else and can't just do the things on this list. They're goals, not tasks.
Bro! I just finished the audiobook about a month ago. I was so pleasantly surprised at how good it was! Fantastic storytelling start to finish. 100% vouch for Project Hail Mary.
Being clean is my number one thing. 15 minutes before I go to bed I tidy up the house. I like waking up in the morning to a clean, tidy house, or even coming home from work and seeing a clean tidy house.
Hey james,i don't really comment on videos but this one felt different.Its special,its personal and most importantly its inspirational.I am 25 years old and haven't figured out anything in life but this video felt like talking to an older wiser friend.Thank you for doing this man.Content is getting real better with video after video! Cheers big bro😊
James....this is probably my favorite episode. You got some good wisdom going there and I'm older than you. It was great getting to know a little better the guy I've watched for so long.
James I always thought of you as a goofball. These videos show so much more of what makes you, and that is fantastic. I am glad that like me you have regrets about past choices. Unlike me, yours would have put you on TV. I don't know if you will read this, but thank you for being so relatable. I plan on showing my son this video tomorrow. Asian you stated, some of these are obvious, but maybe not as obvious to some people. God speeeeeeed my man.
I'll be 42 this year. Only a year ago I started medication and therapy for adhd. Changed my whole life. I thought I had been on top of things before but it felt like I was always running a marathon. Made me realize I wasn't actually on top of things and I had to learn a ton of new skills. That pomodoro method is clutch! Congrats on all your success and cheers to a happy new year
@ just to manage your expectations, I felt superhuman for a few weeks but the meds were just taking my adhd and turning it up to 11. Basic organization and prioritization helped a ton. Keeping anxiety low also improved my focus. Best of luck!
This is SO IMPORTANT for young people, and I know that saying it that way makes me sound old, but I'm going to be 40 in March and like 3/4 of the stuff on this list is stuff I learned in my 30s through tough lessons. I have a feeling James is the same way, and maybe you HAVE to have those tough lessons to really learn this stuff, but man, it's wild to imagine what my life would be like if I started doing some of this stuff in my 20s. Daily exercise, seeing daylight as much as possible, eating real food that grows out of the frickin' ground, slowing down your brain by reading a book for an hour -- these are life-changing things that seem so mundane that you easily overlook them when you're a 20-something who thinks they know how to live. I started living by the rule "seek discomfort" and it has been a massive thing for me. A long time ago I heard someone say "If you want your life to be easy, do hard things" and it took me a good decade to understand what that meant. It's so easy NOT to go for the walk or to read the book or cook your own dinner. These aren't hard things in the traditional sense, but the fact that nobody does them tells you how difficult they actually are and how easy it is to literally anything else. I was a Donut fan since the earliest days and it's so great to see James living his best life right now. Can't wait to see what the future brings, and I'm looking forward to the book club. On that note, an all-time classic is The Alchemist and if you haven't read it yet James, it's one of those "guy learns life lessons the hard way and is better for it" kind of stories that might be a good fit. Cheers bud.
my dad keeps telling the story of how when we are little we say "wow our parents know everything" then when we grow up a little we say " well our parents know most things" then we get to a point of our lives when we say "our parents are out of touch, they don't know what its like, they don't know anything" and as we get older and learn on our own mistakes we start saying "wow our parents knew everything, they were very wise and were trying to help us, too bad we never listened and had to learn it the hard way."
James you’re an inspiration! 2024 was the worst year of my life. Almost kicked the bucket in an accident, my business partner stole my business and all my money, almost lost my family and all I have. Seeing how you have overcome inspires me to do the same, so thank you! On another note, great book suggestion for the “Speeed book club”. The book is called “Injustice, A Crater Novel” great book. Definitely a book for the bros!
I actually discovered your channel before I ever watched Donut, after seeing some of those videos I was shocked. You look so much healthier nowadays dude! Congrats!
Love you, James, thank you for looking out for us for all of these years. Your content has helped an immense amount of people during their own hardships.
One of the biggest things for me I feel was that I was constantly engaging with awful people on social media such as Twitter (especially Twitter). I since deleted my Twitter account and no longer try and argue with idiots posting rubbish online and I feel so much better for it.
advice only works if you have enough perspective to realize that it's good. Which is the problem because perspective like that usually comes from learning the wrong way
Speeed Bookclub's first book(s) should definitely include Starship Troopers (obviously for the memes, but also for the story even if it starts a bit slow) and Ender's Game (for on the thinking side, but also understanding the machinations of people in power); both really resonated with me in my younger days and I think you and others may feel the same.
Man… growing up on TH-cam through two friggin decades, we didn’t have a lotta options for education back then… sure there were math-heads and historians, but a bunch of times it was mostly people like Extra History, Armchair Historian, and Oversimplified for the early big names of History Education on TH-cam… but now, you got; Speeed, TheFatElectrician & Fat Files, HabitualLineCrosser, And a bunch of other stuff that’s been popping up… and that’s wonderful. Wonderful we’ve made it this far, to see all this stuff in 2025.
I meam this in the best way possible, you are like a fun cousin or brother or dad for the younger ones, and i and everybody is very pround of you, and this is one of those videos that will go on the "videos for life" playlist to watch wheneveri need advice, thank you for being you and im pround that you are a very good person, we made the right person famous
Okay James. You are the reason I started watching Donut. Making this personal video that really help someone proves your first habit, because making something like this can't be comfortable. This video really helped me. I'm in a bad place and I started feeling terrible about myself. But seeing this video and seeing that I do all these things (except for buying cars due to lack of money and reading books because of dyslexia lol) it made me feel much better about myself. I'm glad that you got your life together, I hope you'll get even better. Thank you
As someone who is in his 20s looking to grow and make the shift from boy to man I appreciate it that you have made this video James. It helps me see that my plan for 2025 is a good one. Love what you're doing with the Speeed channel. Keep it up!
james u look noticebly healthier, smarter, but also more mature. fell in love w you (or your character) in early donut but it was kinda like one of those mates who's a heck of a fun time, but a mess so you don't wanna be around em for long. youve seemingly really matured
1) have a good diet 2) don't be a hater 3) be on time 4)do the little tasks now(do easy things before they turn to $#@) 5) buy old European cars on marketplaces 6) be clean 7) read books 8) learn how the stuff works (do your best to gain basic knowledge) 9) move around everyday (run, dance or something like that) 10)be ok being uncomfortable 10)
I only watch you with my husband and sons and they made me watch this video. Literally brought me to tears to see the changes in you over the years they’ve made me watch. Absolutely amazing! I’m not your mom, but I’m a mom, and I’m proud of you!
10 years ago this year I had 3 strokes. Taken me this long to start saying, "I probably need to make a fuckin' change". Cheers for this one. Wish someone had woken me up back then.
James, I want to add for you something that I say a lot. Don't measure yourself with someone else's ruler. This is usually followed with things like, don't judge yourself because others will judge you for free, but essentially, stop using other people as your metric, your own progress is its own metric.
"Don't miss out on the garden because you found a flaw in the gate". Thank you for this, James!! Words to live by!
Always!
Sounds all wise, lol.
And already a t-shirt, very not bad.
@@SpeeedCo Put that on some merch! That's gold!
@@SpeeedCo make it a shirt, stat!
i love how this isnt feeling like any of these "only man do these" bs, this is just genuine advice from a man who learnt from his own life
Like the friend who went off got married bought a house and some stocks came back and told you you don’t have to live this way 😂😂😂 it’s amazing
the difference between a grifter and someone who genuinely wants to help people out.
@coleworldcole9438 no, thankfully not. This is just advice to try and get people to get a better life.
I literally hate the type of people that go around and tell other people they have to get married and a house and stocks/children/fancy cars/ you name it. It's just another one of these ancient expectations that puts even more pressure on people that are not doing well.
That or the typical phonk/bass boosted music with grey color scheme saying to cut everything out of your life. This just feels wholesome and genuine, a great way to start 2025 lads
It reminds me of something Daniel Sloss said. It was along the lines of "this isn't coming from me being on some high horse, this is coming from a man who fell off his horse"
2024 was the worst year in my life. Getting divorced, lost my kids, about to go bankrupt, turned 40 yesterday; it's felt like my life has been falling apart at every turn. I'm doing everything I can to try to keep it together. This came at exactly the right time to get me out of a bad funk. I'm taking this to heart, getting after it, putting in that work. Thanks James, thanks Speeed, love you guys.
You got this dude, happy birthday 😊
You got this, I believe in you
Hey, you got this! In 2018 I was getting divorced, I had my kids every other weekend, had so much debt I'd have a panic attack whenever I got groceries, and was thinking about ending it all. Fast forward to now and I have an amazing wife, I have my kids half the time, and my mental health is so much better. Chaos can be a catalyst to reevaluate your life and make some positive decisions, and take you on the best paths you never knew existed. You got this!
keep pushing homie, there's always a way. I'm in my mid 30s and had a couple bad years recently so I feel you. My dumb ass leaned on fictional characters I grew up with to keep me going, it was ridiculous but it worked because I'm doing so much better. Would Goku give up? Fuck no lol
Good luck man, you got this. Happy Birthday!
As a 35 year old functioning alcoholic I just finished a bag of nerds gummy clusters. This video both shocked me awake, and made me tear up. I wish you knew James how much you carried me through covid and depression. I'm so happy that you're working on yourself, I hope I can do the same for me.
you can get there. getting sober is so much better you're not going to believe how much more you're going to like life when you stick with it. setbacks will happen, just talk to others, find what works for you. you can do it
rooting for you mate.
You got this bro
Hey my guy. 12 years ago I was you. Find the things that are holding you down and cut them out. For me it was a toxic marriage I was medicating through, but some people just have a bad relationship with the bottle. I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you the light at the end of the tunnel is real. Head there, we're waiting for you.
Come you the lord. He will carry you
James, i orignally subbed to this channel purely to support you, with the intent of not watching too much because it wasnt about cars. I have since watched every single video and love all of it. Your "assume you like things" rings completely true. Keep doing you man, youre fuckin cool.
*coool
James keep it up, I love your channel. I loved getting to hear more about you. You have all our support.
Same! Didn't really think I would have much interest, but here I am again!
btw subbing and not watching vids hurts more than anything i know you mean well but that hurts him
Same tbh
“Don’t get overwhelmed, just get started” love it dude
Thanks for sharing James. I'm 2 years sober, this video really hit home.
Getting your sh!t together in your 30's is better than in your 40's, it's never too late to take the next right step.
Love this.
Congratulations on doing so well at giving up booze.
My dad's side of my family are/were raging alcoholics. I have both Irish and Scottish blood in my veins. If I would drink a Guinness, guaranteed I'd end up in a fight. So from my early twenties I stopped drinking and replaced it with weed. You don't want to fight when you're on weed. In fact you don't want to do anything while entertaining Mary Jane. I have pretty much been stoned for the last 30 years and have wasted my life being stoned.
It's now been 5 days that I haven't toked. I feel better for it, more coherent, more eloquent and definitely not as foggy in the brain department.
It's only five days, but it's a step in the right direction.
Sobriety has changed so much for me. I wasn't even that much of a fuckup any more when I decided to quit. That being said, I was still enough of a fuckup that I had to decide to not be a fuckup. You can always get better
Great work dude, I’m 1 year sober myself 💙
Getting it together in your 40s is better than etc… for anyone wondering what to do if you are already 40
The throw away joke of "have my dad be alive" levelled me. Like such a incredibly serious point - death of a family member can absolutely wreck someone. I would give anything to hug my dad again.
Completely agree. I think the real lesson there is to “cherish your relationships with people you love”. Don’t take these for granted. Call your mom. Call your dad. Call your kids. One day you’ll wake up and they may be gone. Forever.
Same.
This channel feels like going for a beer with your favorite high school teacher a few years later and having that real and honest talk about life and I'm here for it
Bro I’m saving this. My wife died a few weeks ago and I’m completely miserable and I needed to see this. Thank you.
Dude. I’m so sorry.
Keep going brother! You’re going to make it through this 💪
i’m so sorry for your loss i’m am not to usually comment on youtube videos but thought not exactly the same my uncle just passed away 3 weeks before Christmas and also both my grandparents as we’ll I hope God give us both the strength to make them proud of us up in heaven and the virtue that well see them in the eternal kingdom, stay strong brother as I try too as well
You got this, brother.
I couldn't even imagine dude. So sorry to hear that. Stay strong and be well.
13:29 "Don't get overwhelmed, just get started."
This needs to go on a shirt, too. Such a great piece of advice/inspiration.
Or a hat, with the first part in the front, and the second part in the back in a smaller size
Solid advice
"Just stop being depressed!" Whoa, so wise... :eyeroll:
@@Omniverse0 I'm sorry that you couldn't grasp it on your first go, but it's a little deeper than that. It's alluding to the fact that (large) tasks can seem unmanageable and that rather than overwhelming yourself with it, you should break it down and start somewhere; doesn't matter where, just that you begin the process, which is often the hardest part. Talk about eyerolling... 🙄
@Omniverse0 being stuck in a depressed funk sucks, and it can lead to full blown MDD. Cleaning has helped me more than anything. Start small and just keep trying to build on it
This is what accountability and progress in adulthood looks like. Kudos to you brother.
James is so goals, literally the role model we need for our generation
I wish I could have a massive head like him 😭
We need to stop saying this shit and stop holding people to such a high standard. Not anything against James, but we should focus more on what is being said rather than who is saying it.
This whole parasocial concept of making someone a hero is absurd to me. Sorry if this came off strange, just wanted to blurt this out.
With all that said, great video and great advice throughout!
In a world of Andrew Tates we need more content like this. James it has been such a pleasure watching you over the years. I think I was like 16 or 17 when I started watching Donut. I thought you guys were the coolest. I'm 22 now and have been feeling the need for self improvement and you are such a fantastic role model. Thanks for making videos my guy. Happy New Year.
Wiser words never been said
This is honestly exactly what I needed to see today. I paused the video on number 5, got up and cleaned, didn't come back until I was done. 7 and 5 done
Something that helped out my mental health a ton was thinking "This thing isnt for me" instead of "This thing sucks" because I used to always be mad about random garbage when i was in high school, infinitely happier and more relaxed now.
I got engaged on Christmas, and after 15 years of detailing for someone else I’m finally going to start my own business. I needed this video, Thank you James.
Congratulations! Never give up.
find someone who can get jobs for you if you are doing mobile detailing and if you are getting your own place marketing is more important than anything else !
good luck my friend hope you achieve all your dreams
@@hawhaw6957 I’ll be doing a mixture of both. I’ve been doing side jobs for 2+ years now. Luckily I’ve acquired a handful of good customers over the years. I appreciate the advice, marketing is something I’m still learning!
@Thebuffingwizard: Congratz on getting engaged! Getting married is the best, but most difficult thing I've ever done, but it's definitely worth it. Hope the best for you and your business.
Congratulations man! Good luck on your business!!
This is such a great concept. Feels like an uncle having a talk with you, Giving genuine advice.
James, I’m about to turn 23, kinda lost with myself. I’m gonna give this a shot and see how this year changes from the last. Thank you bro, you’re very appreciated
Advice from someone who just turned thirty and is only just getting their shit together. Don't wait for it to be the right time to improve, do it now. If it sucks, it's hard, you're tired etc do it anyway. I thought I was invincible at 23, now I suffer the consequences of that ignorance 🤣
I was in a similar place at 22. I didn't know what I wanted to do but I knew I wasn't happy. My then girlfriend, now wife, suggested I look into the community college. Now, I'm a powersports technician working on motorcycles, jetskis, snowmobiles, ATVs, and side by sides.
It helped me also to create a list of the types of work I knew I liked. For example: working with my hands, figuring out issues on systems, working primarily by myself, but okay with others as required.
This isn't to say to make a hobby your job because then it's not a hobby anymore. This is more of a way to find work that you can feel more fulfilled.
I’m in the sxact spot spot as you. I’m about to turn 23 as well and have already started doing some of the things he listed before he posted it, and I can tell you from my experience it works. You’re going to look and feel noticeably better. Here’s to a fresh start!
Best of luck man u can do it 💪🏻
I can totally relate to that. Maybe you can learn from my mistakes if you'd indulge me in my unsolicited advice. 23 was an incredibly tough year for me and was the beginning of a stretch of 5+ years that were largely "wasted". From the outside, I nearly had a picture perfect life at 23. I was in a long term relationship with my HS sweetheart, had a six figure engineering job, luxury apartment with friends all close by. However, my mental health was beginning to slide and I didn't adequately address it until far too late. I became very depressed and was too proud to admit to myself and to my gf/family. I was feeling lost because up to that point in my life the expectations and direction was pretty laid out for me (get good grades in high school to get an engineering degree and then a good job). I felt guilty about admitting I was depressed because I didn't have a "reason" to be, which I didn't recognize at the time was the definition of depression. I had discussions with my gf about marriage and she was adamant about waiting at least another 2-3 years (this would have been about 8 years into us dating). My job was great and had a prestigious title but was extremely stressful due to the learning curve and expectations for this particular industry. My personality is one that I will always strive to do my best and produce high quality work/output no matter what it was. I began to lose confidence at work because of how intelligent my coworkers were and how seemingly impossible it would be to get to their level, I was getting discouraged in my relationship just "waiting" to get married, and I was getting lost in my personal direction without having a set game plan. All these factors together led to me becoming more socially distant because after work, all I wanted to do was "relax" and hangout at my apartment. My mental health deteriorated and I became depressed, although I didn't truly recognize it for what it was because I thought I was too strong for that. I began to take kratom which is a legal, plant that affects your opiate receptors in your brain. This made me feel great... Too great. I became addicted to kratom and other less common opiates that wouldn't pop a drug test. My gf was staunchly anti-drug so I was afraid of telling her. She would find my stashes, we would fight, make up, then repeat. I was afraid to own up to my addiction, I was scared to admit that I couldn't handle it on my own. We broke up after 10 years of dating since freshman year hs which sent me into a deeper spiral. I wasted nearly all of my 20s in addiction and depression. It wasn't until I turned 30 that I made a commitment to myself that something had to change. Kicked the drugs, started eating better (I had gained 50+ lbs over my 20s and got back to my college weight at 31), started working out more and forcing myself to be more social. It's still a struggle to find a healthy balance between taking time for myself as an introvert, and making time to spend with family and friends. I never regret it afterwards, I just have to get over the metal block the couple days before about how I don't want to do it. Staying organized and having personal goals has been huge for me. I need something to work towards so I don't feel like I'm just floating through life. Sadly that took me way too long to figure out but at least things are better now.
If you're feeling lost, try to be brutally honest with and ask yourself why that is, or what the root of that feeling is. Then identify what would make that issue go away and come up with an actionable plan to tackle it. Time goes by quickly as an adult so as long as you can make small, consistent changes every day/week/month by the time a couple years go by you'll be in a completely different space!
Anyways, that's my 2 cents. Feel free to ignore haha but if you wanted someone to shoot the shit with just let me know.
I hit rock bottom in 2024. Had a worst breakup of all time with my ex, which eventually found out she had BPD. Moved to a new work environment that kinda not supportive and always looked down upon. Got a couple of major injuries like broken finger and torn muscle, and cannot perform daily run like I used to. And my mom passed away while I was out for work in another city. I had to endure all of this without the privilege to share to others, since I really don't have a supportive family and I'm doing everything myself to keep it together. Your video is not my bingo list, but I appreciate TH-cam recommends this. Thanks James, Thanks Speed, I really need this. I love you guys ❤
My mum commit sui--de a little over a year ago, one of the last conversations we had she told me i needed to get my steps up, i was 6'2 and 112kg so i started walking, 4km was all i could muster, but every single day i walked, gradually i increased how far i could walk, now i walk 6 to 10 kms every single day, rain ,hail or shine. I now weigh 87kg and can run without my knees screaming in pain. If i can do it, anyone can. Put your headphones on, put on some music or a podcast and go walk around your block or a nearby park. Your body and mental health will thank you. RIP mum.
Hell yeah. Make her proud
@palmersola2337 trying my best
Proud of you, losing a parent is never an easy thing to go through
@@__caramel_latte76__83 it's been a rough time. Just trying to carry on but I just wish I could have done more for her. She needed help and I should have known.
Proud of you!
Respect James alot of guys need to hear this I hope at least 1 young man takes this and runs with it
It only takes one
I see what you did there. Respect.
I was constantly 15 minutes late and hurrying everywhere until one day I told myself, just really look at how long things take, so I timed myself on everything. Now I know taking a shower and getting dressed takes 25 minutes, putting my shoes on and going and getting into my car takes 5 minutes, eating a quick meal takes 20 minutes, stopping to buy something takes 15 minutes, and for good measure leave 10 minutes in case something comes up, and if it doesn't that's fine because no one thinks it's weird to show up 10 minutes early anyway. Just making this tiny change to the way I plan my day has reduced my stress a ton, and now people even know me as the shows up exactly on time guy, and I'm proud of myself for that.
I love being late. I will never conform myself to be on time. I love trying to predict how much time I will spend on a task and get it wrong. It's when I run against time than I feel alive, I shine on being late, I found solution to all my problem and if not I lie about it. I freaking loveeee it.
I too am always forgetting to allow for getting ready and travelling time, so I think I have longer than I do. I like your strategy.
I've gotten my morning routine down to 20 or 30 mins and I'm literally making more money bc of it 🥺
Don't ask abt my night routine idk how to sleep 😭
Troll is obvious troll lol
The Art of Racing in The Rain is a perfect first book for the book club.
It has cars, it has racing, and an emotional story about an owner and their dog.
Hard pass on that one bro. That weird alleged abuse section took me out of that book.
I cant ever decide if you are gonna laugh or cry at times. Your face tells me tear up but your chuckle tells me laugh. Love the content m8. That's #11 on the board, "Don't hide your emotions!"
I hit 1 year clean/sober today….the only easy day is yesterday. Thanks, James
Great job!
Hell yeah. I’m coming up on a year on the 11th. I’ve made it to a year a few times and then it usually falls apart but right now I’m genuinely feeling better than I ever have at any point in my life and I know that there are things I can do to make it even better (see: the list) but I’m just proud of where I’m at today. I’m looking forward to getting started with the rest of my life as a better person than I was yesterday.
I’ll be two years in March!
@@SpeeedCo My dude! Congrats on making that change. I’ve been a fan for the past few years, and seeing you look healthy is a huge motivation. Thanks for sharing that being on time story…I needed some inspiration to keep the train rolling.
isn't it nice to not feel like shit everyday and not have to worry about dumb stuff you did? congrats,the longer you go the easier it gets, I quit drinking like 10 years ago and the nice thing is these days it's totally normal not to drink.
13:29 "Just get started" might be the best thing anyone can hear. I had to buy into that statement fully and it brought back so much fulfillment
It’s crazy how much just that little bit helps. I’ma mechanic and wowee some jobs can be so overwhelming. I like to break it down to little jobs and goals to hit, certain bolts or parts to take off. And before ya know it, it’s all done
Introducing myself is a habit I've gotten into over the past couple of months. It's dramatically improved my confidence and social skills.
This is actually one of the most real lists. You aren't saying "get up at 4 a.m." This applies to the average person. Thank you.
Bruh. I've been following you since the beginnings of Donut. I just had a heart attack like 3 weeks ago. I'm 34. This list is something I've been working on myself. When i first got better, i watched the episode of Stussy. And remembered you went through something similar. It gave me a lot of hope for me and the future. I'd rather it not happen, but I'm glad I'm able to not feel alone in this struggle. You are an inspiration, James.
Hey hope your journey goes great dude
@BilBob-vb4gb thanks bro!
I can relate to the hating. I used to hate anything new. New music, new movies, new games, etc. I realized at one point that all those people are trying to do is entertain me, and I'm shoving their work back in their face only because of my own stubbornness. It's a terrible way to live.
Perfectly curated list of things that 110% legit work.
Remember, life isn't linear - the point of doing these things isn't to suddenly feel good exactly each and every time you do them, it's to develop and maintain a continuous sense of doing well that frees you to experience more of the good things you want without any of the bad and give you the resilience to take the bad without it knocking you down each time.
I've been trying to work on myself for years now. I got clean, sober and quit smoking. I started eating better and working out. I got my career back on track and have been studying to progress at my job. I got myself out of tens of thousands in debt and am now saving for a down payment on a house. I've been doing counselling and working on fixing my mental health issues. I've been learning about myself and why my mind is the way it is. Recently I've been questioning the point of it all. Sometimes that voice in your head isn't on your side. Learning to say no to yourself and stay on track is hard. Being okay with being uncomfortable means not picking up that bottle when things aren't going well. It means pushing through the pain to set a PR in the gym. And it means confronting the trauma that got me going on the wrong path in the first place. Everyday is a new day for change.
wow man, this is me pretty much spot on. from the start to the bottom of your paragraph, let's keep going man
Proud of you
Im right there with you man, and proud of you! Personal growth is hard when you dont even know whats wrong to begin with, or why everything is the way it is. I'm learning everyday. Keep it up, just read other's struggles, journeys, and victories really does help ease the burden and relate to people you dont even know. I realize im not alone, and neither are you and were all struggling somewhere. This video and comment section is a breath od fresh air.
My dad used to tell me when I was procrastinating at doing something (literally anything), is "the best way to finish a job is to start it". I have lived by that ethos all my life and it it one thing that I use to give myself a kick up the butt to do the task now.
Thank you James. Something I have learned over the past like 5 years is that YOU SHOULD DO THINGS YOU'RE BAD AT.
5 years ago I couldn't ride a bike, I wasn't handy, I couldn't cook, I was fat, I had kidney stones at 20 years old, and I was awful at reading. Since then, I got really into cycling, became a bike tech, have cooked some of the best food I've ever ate in my life, lost 100 lbs, I drink a lot of water, and learned I am dyslexic BUT I'M BETTER AT READING. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I've wrangled up a decent career as a graphic designer with no degree because I'm good at what I do because I just keep pushing myself to get better at the things I'm not good at.
Do things you're bad at!
Dude, that's amazing! I hate doing things I'm bad at, I really need to work on that. You inspired me, I'm going on a bike ride right now!
Proud of you man! That's an inspiration!
Hes not attacking this from a place pf regret or feeling shitty for the past. Hes not trying to beat anybodu down for not doing these things and hes not wrapping it in a macho wrap of i have the keys to the world this is what more people need
As an almost 60 year old I can attest that THIS is GOLD!! Way to go James, you are good people and your ripple effect will go far and wide. Trust me.
A couple I will add:
1) Learn how you need to learn. Everyone learns differently, and it can be very nuanced (time, place, environmental conditions, visual, auditory, kinesthetic, data driven, formula driven, logical, emotional, etc.) Once you know HOW you learn, you'll learn new things far faster.
2) Every day/week/month/etc try to "move the ball forward." It's easy to get stuck doing routine sustainment activities (groceries, exercise, work, sleep, etc.) Plan activities that you regularly work on that actually move the ball forward. Things like working toward an advanced degree, working on a house or car project, researching something that'll help you make an important decision, learning a new subject, check on your retirement plan, etc.) You make life-changing progress when you remember to try and move the ball forward on a regular basis.
3) Build a [flexible] routine. Success isn't done overnight. It's the product of long-term small steps. The key to doing that well is having a routine.
4) If you REALLY want to learn or master something, develop a personal curriculum or plan. Focus less on repetitive practice and more on "deliberate practice."
5) Little gestures matter, but build the habit to do them. Try to look people in the eyes when thanking them. Write hand-written 'thank you' letters. Hold the door open for people. Things like that.
Good books I'd suggest: "The Power of Habit" and "Talent is Overrated." Those two books will completely change how you approach life.
If you want to remember something, read it, say it out loud, and write it down. It’s now stored in three interconnected places in your brain. I learned that from a roommate in college. It works.
The only other person on who has read Talent is Overrated. I randomly read that book 8 yrs ago, and I still talk about it today.
As an engineer, figuring out how stuff works is part of my lifestyle, and it’s SOOO helpful in daily life. Not just mechanical stuff, but stuff like “how does the stock market work?”, “how is my food made?”, or “how do elections work?”
Just getting a cursory understanding of how the world works goes miles toward developing empathy for others and forming your own opinions rather than be spoon-fed social media clickbait.
Bro I can so relate to that too! Knowing a little bit about everything just makes you a more competent person in general
Please be the one TH-camr that makes a video just because you want to regardless of what us, the viewers think of it. There's literally so much stuff I've learnt from you and the sheer randomness of your content. I want a vintage Leica now cause of that one video and a quirky European hatchback. Keep doing what you're doing bro❤LOOOVE IT
Me personally 2024 was no doubt a tough year for me mentally. But from doing things like going on for a walk, limiting time on my phone, and valuing time with friends has helped me out a lot. I don’t believe that being an avid gym goer and book reader alone will solve everything in one’s life, but doing the small steps can make a huge difference in having the mental clarity to go through the chaos in life.
Everyone will go on a different mountain path to where they need to be. EVERYONE. 💪
Me @ 16:38 “fuckn dork” 😂😂 more of these videos please!
I dont normally comment but here I go:
I have been struggling with weed and alchohol and I’ve been starting to turn it around. Some of these lessons I have already learned, even the uncomfortable one but I had both forgotten and gotten to cozy in chasing the dopamine. Hearing about your health, both socially and with your body, especially the drinking drugs and unhealthy food, is great inspiration. I’ll prob come back and watch this again when I’m getting that wave of feeling like shit to pass. I’ve loved you for your cars, jokes, videos, and now your life take. Love you James from someone you won’t ever meet
Start changing your habits. Do hobbies. It’s a great struggle but fill your time with constructive things that will make you work to get to that next level. Don’t drown in your own sorrows till you… love yourself. You can come back from anything you put your mind to!!
For me a huge shift was simply, Gratitude. Live life and view things from a place of gratitude, change your perception.
"It's not a party if it happens every night". Find a hobby/hobbies(for me it's video games) to keep yourself out of trouble. Smoking weed is fine but you shouldn't be stoned 24/7, I usually wait until around dinner time at least when I'm done with everything for the day.
I dont comment either, but this video has complled me. Im quiting both of those rn too. And trying to get real dopamine. Its hard to even acknowledge the real issues at the core. So props to you man! You can do it! My book club recommendation was Mind Hacking by Sir John Hargrave. Nobody will seee it but i highly recommend it if you are struggling to do or improve anything in life. Its funny and not at all pretentious or serious. Good luck to you sir!
I’m 23 and am getting my stuff together. Finishing college, started a business, and got engaged. But all of these things that are I have learned or you just taught me that are genuinely beneficial to my life. Especially the “due the little things now.” It saves sooooo much stress in the long run
This was the video I needed to start 2025
"Be ok being uncomfortable" is something I've been working on for a bit, but it has drastically changed my life in a good way.
Giving up drinking is one of the biggest things I've told people can change your life for the better. I drank every day for almost 8 years, totally roasted my 20s. I turn 30 next year and it'll be my 3rd year sober. I can't imagine being even half the man, son, or husband I am now, hitting the beers and bottle like I used to.
It allowed so much more life to open up when I wasn't spending 2/3 of the day either foggy or hungover. Your final point is absolutely what that habit manifested from and it's crazy to hear someone else identify it like that. Big ups for this dude.
im 26 tryna quit now my bro, spent atleast 200 days drunk in 2024
but its weird cuz when i drink i get shit done like simple tasks ive been offputting after a drink it gets me going, but the negatives are worse
Good job! Thats amazing and in my opinion the best thing one can do to make his life better. Took me far to long to realize it however.
I am starting my 3rd year sober also.
Love how the vibe of video is to lift people up. No negativity, no talking down on other people. Just helpful advice that you're sharing. Solid video James
Why is this the first self help message that has ever resonated with me? James, time and time again you inspire us. Thank you. From a thirty something year old that needed a list.
Happy new year James!
I don't cry a lot, but listening to your realizations made me do some reflecting too. So you made me cry today, and I'm okay with that. Thank you James!
As a notorious deadline screw up your table read story sends shivers down my spine. Most people have to retake a test or reschedule for being late, but this is a whole different thing.
Best piece of advice that changed my life was from a Chaplain. He said something along the lines of, if you aren't uncomfortable, you can never grow. Pretty much, if you never push yourself or try to avoid things, you will stagnate. Or kind of like, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. You might go through difficult times in life or have to struggle through certain things, but it will make you a better, tougher, more resilient person.
Dude this video hits hard. I suffer from an extreme form of PTSD from my work. I’m not able to work, I will never go back to my previous job and I suffer minute to minute, hour to hour. I try to approach each day by looking forward to the next 10 mins of the day, reset and keep pushing forward. A lot of the time I feel so lonely but when I see videos such as this one, it really puts into perspective that I am not alone. It’s comforting. Learning to love and live in the uncomfortably is key! Thank you so much James for putting out a video to which others can relate. Means so much to people suffering and trying to find their path in life. Thank you!!
This video was pretty awesome. I feel like I got to see a lot of the steps of your journey and while they may not be perfect for everyone, it is all about finding out what to do on the journey. Love love love your inspiration and positivity!
Awesome video as always, thanks for that James.
Books:
1- Band of brothers. dosnt get harder than that.
2- The Lies of Locke Lamora.
3- Lone Survivor.
From one James to another, thank you. Love you dude. These are all things I've started doing in the last year and a half or so, and holy moly it's changed my life in immeasurable ways. And it all started with "Be ok being uncomfortable", which meant confronting the things I didn't like about my life and myself, to acknowledge that I need to change, and do the hard uncomfortable work to improve them. Things I definitely wish I started doing 10 years ago. But now I'm healthier, happier, more productive, more confident, and more successful than ever. If only after 1.5 years, imagine where I'll end up as I continue in 5 years. 10 years. 50 years. Holy moly.
James is out here helping us with nothing in return, absolute chad . we love you james❤
It has a sponsor in the video but I get what you mean...
This was a great and thoughtful list. I’m in my 40’s now and can confirm these are definitely important. I’d like to add one more. Find good friends, and do your utmost to nurture those friendships. Be there for them when they need you, and keep in touch with them often. This is two fold. We’re seeing so many younger people opting out of time out with friends, or going to a happy hour, or just general involvement with other people that it’s truly become an epidemic. I myself am guilty of this, I work full time remote, and my company is halfway across the country. While I am married with children I don’t have many people I can just pick up the phone and talk to, so I’ve made a change to volunteer places, and meet people I otherwise never would have. Relationships make the world go round✌️
Can confirm that eating better makes a huge difference. When I got married, my diet changed from chicken nuggets and the like to actually home cooked meals, most from scratch, *with veggies in each meal*. I felt like I ate the same amount of food, but I lost 10 lb in less than a year.
This is chalked full of lifechanging advice. It takes courage to be as vulnerable as you were in this presentation--thank you for that, James.
This one felt good. Def the most personal video I’ve ever made.
@@SpeeedCo I feel like you're the first showhost to allow yourself to be soo vulnerable and not put on a facade. You're deliberately putting yourself out there with the intention of helping others. No.1. Thanks for sharing
This is better advice than most motivational speakers 💪🏼😎
Just lived experience
I don't expect that you'll read this, but the best thing that happened to you (from my perspective) was setting out on your own to make Speeed. This video, and this channel, are so much more than car content. This video is genuinely one of the best collections of advice I've ever seen. I will be sending it to anyone who needs it (and asks...). Happy new year!
The last tip #1 is similar to seek discomfort from yes theory. I’d recommend them if this resonated with people. Great message to be uncomfortable and find new experiences through it
Man, you got me crying with this one, James. Please, keep it real forever and we will forever love you
Don't feel bad if you're ADHD, OCD, depressed, autistic, dyslexic, disabled, or whatever else and can't just do the things on this list. They're goals, not tasks.
10:50 A good first book would be ‘Project Hail Mary’. A very good sci-fi book that is very well written!
Bro! I just finished the audiobook about a month ago. I was so pleasantly surprised at how good it was! Fantastic storytelling start to finish. 100% vouch for Project Hail Mary.
Being clean is my number one thing.
15 minutes before I go to bed I tidy up the house.
I like waking up in the morning to a clean, tidy house, or even coming home from work and seeing a clean tidy house.
Hey james,i don't really comment on videos but this one felt different.Its special,its personal and most importantly its inspirational.I am 25 years old and haven't figured out anything in life but this video felt like talking to an older wiser friend.Thank you for doing this man.Content is getting real better with video after video! Cheers big bro😊
James....this is probably my favorite episode. You got some good wisdom going there and I'm older than you. It was great getting to know a little better the guy I've watched for so long.
James I always thought of you as a goofball. These videos show so much more of what makes you, and that is fantastic. I am glad that like me you have regrets about past choices. Unlike me, yours would have put you on TV.
I don't know if you will read this, but thank you for being so relatable. I plan on showing my son this video tomorrow. Asian you stated, some of these are obvious, but maybe not as obvious to some people.
God speeeeeeed my man.
Real talk on the running. It is a stress reliever, mind stimulator, mood booster... so much
Love that James is in a better place and has grown into his big bro role on TH-cam so well. Really proud and will be a life long supporter
I'll be 42 this year. Only a year ago I started medication and therapy for adhd. Changed my whole life. I thought I had been on top of things before but it felt like I was always running a marathon. Made me realize I wasn't actually on top of things and I had to learn a ton of new skills. That pomodoro method is clutch! Congrats on all your success and cheers to a happy new year
Turning 41 this year and just started meds for adhd feel like will be a game changer for me as well.
@ just to manage your expectations, I felt superhuman for a few weeks but the meds were just taking my adhd and turning it up to 11. Basic organization and prioritization helped a ton. Keeping anxiety low also improved my focus. Best of luck!
This is SO IMPORTANT for young people, and I know that saying it that way makes me sound old, but I'm going to be 40 in March and like 3/4 of the stuff on this list is stuff I learned in my 30s through tough lessons. I have a feeling James is the same way, and maybe you HAVE to have those tough lessons to really learn this stuff, but man, it's wild to imagine what my life would be like if I started doing some of this stuff in my 20s.
Daily exercise, seeing daylight as much as possible, eating real food that grows out of the frickin' ground, slowing down your brain by reading a book for an hour -- these are life-changing things that seem so mundane that you easily overlook them when you're a 20-something who thinks they know how to live. I started living by the rule "seek discomfort" and it has been a massive thing for me. A long time ago I heard someone say "If you want your life to be easy, do hard things" and it took me a good decade to understand what that meant. It's so easy NOT to go for the walk or to read the book or cook your own dinner. These aren't hard things in the traditional sense, but the fact that nobody does them tells you how difficult they actually are and how easy it is to literally anything else.
I was a Donut fan since the earliest days and it's so great to see James living his best life right now. Can't wait to see what the future brings, and I'm looking forward to the book club. On that note, an all-time classic is The Alchemist and if you haven't read it yet James, it's one of those "guy learns life lessons the hard way and is better for it" kind of stories that might be a good fit. Cheers bud.
my dad keeps telling the story of how when we are little we say "wow our parents know everything" then when we grow up a little we say " well our parents know most things" then we get to a point of our lives when we say "our parents are out of touch, they don't know what its like, they don't know anything" and as we get older and learn on our own mistakes we start saying "wow our parents knew everything, they were very wise and were trying to help us, too bad we never listened and had to learn it the hard way."
James you’re an inspiration! 2024 was the worst year of my life. Almost kicked the bucket in an accident, my business partner stole my business and all my money, almost lost my family and all I have. Seeing how you have overcome inspires me to do the same, so thank you! On another note, great book suggestion for the “Speeed book club”. The book is called “Injustice, A Crater Novel” great book. Definitely a book for the bros!
I actually discovered your channel before I ever watched Donut, after seeing some of those videos I was shocked. You look so much healthier nowadays dude! Congrats!
James we are so proud of you. Your dad should come back.
Bro 😢
Alright man 😭 let's chill a little
Thumbs Down Bro...
Love you, James, thank you for looking out for us for all of these years. Your content has helped an immense amount of people during their own hardships.
One of the biggest things for me I feel was that I was constantly engaging with awful people on social media such as Twitter (especially Twitter). I since deleted my Twitter account and no longer try and argue with idiots posting rubbish online and I feel so much better for it.
James, you're a great human being. Thanks for being who you are and sharing with all us strangers on the internet. We love you. :)
Love everything about this. Wish I watched this video 10 years ago.
advice only works if you have enough perspective to realize that it's good. Which is the problem because perspective like that usually comes from learning the wrong way
Speeed Bookclub's first book(s) should definitely include Starship Troopers (obviously for the memes, but also for the story even if it starts a bit slow) and Ender's Game (for on the thinking side, but also understanding the machinations of people in power); both really resonated with me in my younger days and I think you and others may feel the same.
Ender’s Game has been on my list for a while now. That would be a great one to start out with. Pumped for Speeed reads!
Man… growing up on TH-cam through two friggin decades, we didn’t have a lotta options for education back then… sure there were math-heads and historians, but a bunch of times it was mostly people like Extra History, Armchair Historian, and Oversimplified for the early big names of History Education on TH-cam… but now, you got;
Speeed,
TheFatElectrician & Fat Files,
HabitualLineCrosser,
And a bunch of other stuff that’s been popping up… and that’s wonderful. Wonderful we’ve made it this far, to see all this stuff in 2025.
Big thumbs up for being vulnerable James. Excellent video that a lot of people need to see.
I meam this in the best way possible, you are like a fun cousin or brother or dad for the younger ones, and i and everybody is very pround of you, and this is one of those videos that will go on the "videos for life" playlist to watch wheneveri need advice, thank you for being you and im pround that you are a very good person, we made the right person famous
Honestly my favorite video of yours so far
Okay James.
You are the reason I started watching Donut.
Making this personal video that really help someone proves your first habit, because making something like this can't be comfortable.
This video really helped me. I'm in a bad place and I started feeling terrible about myself. But seeing this video and seeing that I do all these things (except for buying cars due to lack of money and reading books because of dyslexia lol) it made me feel much better about myself.
I'm glad that you got your life together, I hope you'll get even better.
Thank you
Damn. What else do you need on January 1st? Sage wisdom, James. That last one 🤌, thanks man. You're the coolest dork around.
As someone who is in his 20s looking to grow and make the shift from boy to man I appreciate it that you have made this video James. It helps me see that my plan for 2025 is a good one. Love what you're doing with the Speeed channel. Keep it up!
I appreciate that
You leaving donut was bitter sweet. This content is so good
Thank you
james u look noticebly healthier, smarter, but also more mature. fell in love w you (or your character) in early donut but it was kinda like one of those mates who's a heck of a fun time, but a mess so you don't wanna be around em for long. youve seemingly really matured
1) have a good diet
2) don't be a hater
3) be on time
4)do the little tasks now(do easy things before they turn to $#@)
5) buy old European cars on marketplaces
6) be clean
7) read books
8) learn how the stuff works (do your best to gain basic knowledge)
9) move around everyday (run, dance or something like that)
10)be ok being uncomfortable
10)
5 haha hell to the nah. Unless I have endless funds from winning the lotto 😅
Took me long enough to find your comment - thank you! 👍
Thanks for the comment saved me most of 17 minutes
Thank you!
Broooo. We need a podcast from you.
Just getting your perspective on life in general 🔥
podcasts are silly, their video output speed is the perfect pace of unpredictable and exactly when you want it
Hell yeah. A speeed video for the new year.
Love y'all.
I only watch you with my husband and sons and they made me watch this video. Literally brought me to tears to see the changes in you over the years they’ve made me watch. Absolutely amazing! I’m not your mom, but I’m a mom, and I’m proud of you!
5:13 why didn’t that agent tell you it was a table read is my question
100%. Agent should have specified and Pump should have asked what this was all about.
Nope. I love James, but, always be 10 minutes early. No excuses
Ties to another point; never assume.
@@danpatrick5944 exactly. If you're on time, you're late.
Second. Bad agent. Bad take on the situation, but bad agent.
10 years ago this year I had 3 strokes. Taken me this long to start saying, "I probably need to make a fuckin' change". Cheers for this one. Wish someone had woken me up back then.
13:05 that’s bad cable management, pull them out
lol
James, I want to add for you something that I say a lot.
Don't measure yourself with someone else's ruler.
This is usually followed with things like, don't judge yourself because others will judge you for free, but essentially, stop using other people as your metric, your own progress is its own metric.