I've noticed since I started speaking up more, it has created more back and forth between people and I. People put you in a box when you're "agreeable' and when you change that you become the problem. I can clearly see that I tolerated so much that I shouldn't have.
Its such an annoying feeling, but I’m feeling elated by my changes. Speaking my mind is freeing, and the years of suppression have done nothing but given me time to hone the tact to still do it gracefully
Yes no more nice girl. It translates to not being intelligent in society I’ve learned the hard way. It’s okay to be a good person but don’t be a nice person 🤷🏾♀️💕🙏🏿💫
I think it's important to be yourself in other words if you're naturally nice continue just with limits, setting boundaries are very necessary especially considering the narcissistic generation we're living in.
Im that way now, as a former people pleaser. It's hard to do sometimes because people will try to take you as rude now that you are no-nonsense, but you have to stay on your course because nice=doormat to people!
Speaking up for myself has meant becoming the villain, and you know what? That’s okay! When you say “no” or disagree with something, it’s like dragging nails down a board - people HATE TO HEAR IT! They’re so used to you going with what they want, they begin to expect it. I spoke up for myself and removed myself from being a bridesmaid - the shock! I love and respect myself more, and a wedding won’t be a reason why I go against myself and please others who disrespect me. Nope. I also stopped responding to “dry begging” because being “nice” and jumping in to save others left me in the gutter and depleted girl!
How I see it is one less person to buy a gift for 😂😂one less person to keep me up all night venting my ear off and one less person to try to throw jabs at me when people are around…if it’s not a flowing bond I want no parts❤❤
I am so nice. But I am not mistaken for naive. I can pivot in a second. I usually start every interaction with new people nicely but I plant it in there that I am intelligent and not easily manipulated or afraid of having an opinion. Find a way to say something that shows you see the situation for what it is, you can do it nicely. But use your voice. Show in your body, that you have ground. You can do everything without arguing. Own your feelings. You can step away and still be nice.
I grew up in super religious Christian family and community and unfortunately my parents picked out the part of the Bible scriptures like “love thou neighbor” “turn the other cheek” “pray for them”., “bless people” ..when i became spiritually “WOKE” im not loving on a quarrelsome neighbor who is a busy body for no reason, I’m darn sure not turning the other cheek instead im professionally going to check them.. im keeping my prayers for my love ones and myself I’m not focusing on hateful spiteful people in my prayers those folks need shadow and inner work..I also had to stop “blessing people” I financially have done well since the late 90s as a young lady in the medical field I use to help “save” people from getting their cars repossessed lights to stay home and a roof over top of their head mean while I just got a divorce and was a single mother Those same people turned on me and hated seeing me blessed so they tried to tear down my character I’m no longer saving no one except myself .. My daughter is now 23 years old and she always say “Mom I will be a little selfish those people get what they want I have seen you soooo good to people just for them to hurt you badly”..NOW I NOT ONLY SPEAK IN TRUTH BUT LIVE IT
I sent your video to my little sister, she’s 15. Every time we talk, I don’t see her, I see the agreeable, nice girl robot her influences have created in her. I watch her disappoint herself to appease others and I couldn’t find the words to tell her exactly this. Thank you ❤
Oh wow!!! I’m hoping lil sis hears exactly what she needs to hear to elevate past that nice girl stage…. We want to get to her early so she won’t have to learn this later in life….
I just ran across your channel, thank you so much for this video, being the nice girl has been my name from every since I can remember ❤️ I was told in college that I was passive, it took me a while to process but it was true. I understood that the person was not being mean but truthful. At 36 now I'm learning how and using my voice more. Ive always seen myself as an honest person, but clearly, I've been lying to myself, which has definitely been a disservice to me. I only wanted others to like me and not be mad at me. For the past year, Im changing, not caring about what others think of myself but speaking and being more truthful when to myself first, then others. ❤❤
You have a nice speaking voice. Have you ever thought of doing voice acting, voice overs and or audio books? And no is an entire sentence. In this season of life, if I have to make some adjustments and then I'll like it, it's a no for me. I have been decluttering for what seems like forever. People, shoes, wigs, clothes, appliances, etc have been evicted from my presence. There's a certain feel and smile I get when someone or something is right for me. We ought to normalize having boundaries, even with ourselves. And yes, the hair is giving va va va voom. Like old Hollywood glam (Diahann Caroll The Supremes, etc)
I think it's important to be yourself in other words if you're naturally nice continue just with limits, setting boundaries are very necessary especially considering the narcissistic generation we're living in. Don't allow this cold world turn you all into someone you're really not! Be yourself, be clear in your expectations, set boundaries, feel comfortable saying no! Dismiss anyone not adding to your growth😊
THANKYOU SO MUCH GIRL I REALLY REALLY NEEDED TO HEAR THIS BEEN FOREVER NICE AND I REALLY NEED TO CHANGE BUT I DO ALWAYS SPEAK MY TRUTH BUT IN A NICE WAY NOT TO HURT OTHERS GIRL YOU LOOK GORGEOUS 🙏😘✨️💖🕊🌹🧿
Hiii just had to come down in these comments to say you’re giving dream girl❤ you’re so beautiful and your voice is amazing. Thank you for the advices.
I was NEVER the nice girl to begin with anyhow… nice is for suckers yo…. I’d rather be the real me… I will treat those that I meet on merit only… I’m a kind but cold by nature individual and I’ve always been like this so you can either like me because of this or you can hate me for it but I am not fussed either way… I am that I am and proud to be the me that I am and ain’t nothing or nobody gonna change that no way no how…. Sooooo There you go !! Cheers & Ciao ;)’
Ppl don't understand or comprehend being nice or kind. Seems like the only language they speak is (cray cray) toxicity, being mean, dismissive, and rude. Most don't even reciprocate when you say good morning or have a nice day. I actually had someone be really mean and sarcastic because I said, "Have a good day hun", she got real indignant and slick at the mouth. I was very confused. I asked my adult son what he thought the problem was? He said she probably thought I was being funny by being nice... Im 53, and that's the weirdest thing I've ever heard of... We were taught to be polite, have manners, respect your elders, and be helpful towards others, especially the old & disabled. Which is what I taught my kids. Just being decent and good humans....But this generation is goofy and touched. This zort of rude behavior is especially bad among women in the brown community...
😆 Microphone is being used … you are more than welcome to add the the microphone fund if you like though … what microphone do you use?I didn’t see a video on your channel describing what’s the best 🎤 to use when doing content. But I’ve watched other channels and I use what’s recommended but I want to know which one do you recommend…
PS…. Let your yes’s be yes and your No’s be just so… nicey nice it’s true has no edge and you gotta have an edge about you cos otherwise what’s the point… i mean ‘nice’ always finishes last… no offence….. just sayin
Sorry, I couldn't hear you over that hair volume❤
lol!!!😂 the hair is tea… friend
@YourLifestylist Yes, it's beautiful
Yes that hair is giving ! That’s the first thing I noticed
Hahaha right?
😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤❤
People mistake my politeness for being gullible. I’m nice because I know my other side is very very dark.
The dark side ain’t no joke
Right
Same. I'm not the one
Exactly
Exactly!! I've scared myself before. 😒
Being nice has people talking to me sidewayz, being taken advantage of, and being criticized. No thanks, I don’t want more of that.
I've noticed since I started speaking up more, it has created more back and forth between people and I.
People put you in a box when you're "agreeable' and when you change that you become the problem. I can clearly see that I tolerated so much that I shouldn't have.
I’m glad you are speaking up more!!!!
You said this well!
Its such an annoying feeling, but I’m feeling elated by my changes. Speaking my mind is freeing, and the years of suppression have done nothing but given me time to hone the tact to still do it gracefully
Story of my life!!!!
8:57
It's getting HARDER.... people are very BOLD ✌🏽
We have to be bolder!!!!
Yes no more nice girl. It translates to not being intelligent in society I’ve learned the hard way. It’s okay to be a good person but don’t be a nice person 🤷🏾♀️💕🙏🏿💫
Exactly
I think it's important to be yourself in other words if you're naturally nice continue just with limits, setting boundaries are very necessary especially considering the narcissistic generation we're living in.
Yes… that’s why i mentioned being better not different from who you are but an elevated version ;)
@@YourLifestylist that’s good. I love that concept.
Being authentic always makes people uncomfortable. Continue to do you boo….
First off : HAIR 😍
The secret is this link: www.tiktok.com/t/ZTFKoPrsh/
Im that way now, as a former people pleaser. It's hard to do sometimes because people will try to take you as rude now that you are no-nonsense, but you have to stay on your course because nice=doormat to people!
Exactly
I'm disrespected by family, co-workers, and friends. I don't want to be a nice girl anymore. It's exhausting, and I need to find my backbone.
Oh my yesss don’t let them block your greatness
When I asked for a message this morning on my way to a toxic work environment; this came up on my feed….right on time 🙌🏾❤️❤️
Perfect! 😍
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Girl, you work at school don’t you?
Speaking up for myself has meant becoming the villain, and you know what? That’s okay! When you say “no” or disagree with something, it’s like dragging nails down a board - people HATE TO HEAR IT! They’re so used to you going with what they want, they begin to expect it. I spoke up for myself and removed myself from being a bridesmaid - the shock! I love and respect myself more, and a wedding won’t be a reason why I go against myself and please others who disrespect me. Nope. I also stopped responding to “dry begging” because being “nice” and jumping in to save others left me in the gutter and depleted girl!
It feels good to stand on business about yourself
How I see it is one less person to buy a gift for 😂😂one less person to keep me up all night venting my ear off and one less person to try to throw jabs at me when people are around…if it’s not a flowing bond I want no parts❤❤
@@YourLifestylist Absolutely!
@@mommafoxxdiaries6509 The power of one less - I’ll take it! 😂 because who wants to put up with that? 😒
@@msalexclove EXACTLY!!!
I am so nice. But I am not mistaken for naive. I can pivot in a second. I usually start every interaction with new people nicely but I plant it in there that I am intelligent and not easily manipulated or afraid of having an opinion. Find a way to say something that shows you see the situation for what it is, you can do it nicely. But use your voice. Show in your body, that you have ground. You can do everything without arguing. Own your feelings. You can step away and still be nice.
Needed this. Side note: your camera quality is great. You look gorge. Thanks for your wise words.
Ty so much and I’m glad you’re here!!!
she really pretty❤❤❤❤
I grew up in super religious Christian family and community and unfortunately my parents picked out the part of the Bible scriptures like “love thou neighbor” “turn the other cheek” “pray for them”., “bless people” ..when i became spiritually “WOKE” im not loving on a quarrelsome neighbor who is a busy body for no reason, I’m darn sure not turning the other cheek instead im professionally going to check them.. im keeping my prayers for my love ones and myself I’m not focusing on hateful spiteful people in my prayers those folks need shadow and inner work..I also had to stop “blessing people” I financially have done well since the late 90s as a young lady in the medical field I use to help “save” people from getting their cars repossessed lights to stay home and a roof over top of their head mean while I just got a divorce and was a single mother Those same people turned on me and hated seeing me blessed so they tried to tear down my character I’m no longer saving no one except myself .. My daughter is now 23 years old and she always say “Mom I will be a little selfish those people get what they want I have seen you soooo good to people just for them to hurt you badly”..NOW I NOT ONLY SPEAK IN TRUTH BUT LIVE IT
Yeeessss!!!! I definitely should do a video on releasing religion in order to live … ty for sharing this!!!!
Girl you are so pretty 🤩
Ty love!!!!
I sent your video to my little sister, she’s 15. Every time we talk, I don’t see her, I see the agreeable, nice girl robot her influences have created in her. I watch her disappoint herself to appease others and I couldn’t find the words to tell her exactly this. Thank you ❤
Oh wow!!! I’m hoping lil sis hears exactly what she needs to hear to elevate past that nice girl stage…. We want to get to her early so she won’t have to learn this later in life….
I feel like God always knows what we need because I NEEDED this video and it randomly popped up for me. Thank you for the message. ❤
I’m glad you listened to God!!! I hope you heard what was intended for you to hear
I just ran across your channel, thank you so much for this video, being the nice girl has been my name from every since I can remember ❤️ I was told in college that I was passive, it took me a while to process but it was true. I understood that the person was not being mean but truthful. At 36 now I'm learning how and using my voice more. Ive always seen myself as an honest person, but clearly, I've been lying to myself, which has definitely been a disservice to me. I only wanted others to like me and not be mad at me. For the past year, Im changing, not caring about what others think of myself but speaking and being more truthful when to myself first, then others. ❤❤
You have a nice speaking voice. Have you ever thought of doing voice acting, voice overs and or audio books?
And no is an entire sentence. In this season of life, if I have to make some adjustments and then I'll like it, it's a no for me. I have been decluttering for what seems like forever. People, shoes, wigs, clothes, appliances, etc have been evicted from my presence. There's a certain feel and smile I get when someone or something is right for me. We ought to normalize having boundaries, even with ourselves.
And yes, the hair is giving va va va voom. Like old Hollywood glam (Diahann Caroll The Supremes, etc)
Ty ty!!! Actually my cousins said I should do voice overs but I haven’t looked into it yet …. ;)
I reset my YT feed and you popped up. This video came right on time! Beautifully stated.❤
I’m glad it resonates
I think it's important to be yourself in other words if you're naturally nice continue just with limits, setting boundaries are very necessary especially considering the narcissistic generation we're living in. Don't allow this cold world turn you all into someone you're really not! Be yourself, be clear in your expectations, set boundaries, feel comfortable saying no! Dismiss anyone not adding to your growth😊
Just be a good person not nice it translate to not being intelligent even though we know ow that’s not the case
This is an important lesson you are sharing with the beautiful souls gravitating to your channel!!❤️🙏🏾
Thank you so much 🤗
Yes to the hair, hunty!!! 🤩
Yeesss!!! Ty love
You are NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL! Love the wisdom and knowledge.
I needed this!
Ty for that!!!
It is the most freeing thing I have ever done. I’m so grateful ❤
It is!!!! And congrats to you for doing it
Yes girl tired of ppl taking advantage
Thank you, Gorgeous! I just discovered your channel today! I needed to hear this 🙌🏽
This video randomly popped up on my feed. I love your page name!
Oh thank you!
Yes!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!! I love it, thank you
Thank you for this! I needed this talk today ❤️
Thank you for your channel, very happy to come across it ❤
I’m happy you are here!!!! Thank you
I really needed to hear this
Good message - I'm ready to activate!
P.S. - beautiful delivery and aesthetic! 🎉
Ty… and welcome to the Channel
Give hair give 😩✨💕💕💕
The hair & skin ❤❤❤💐
Ty love
This is sooo me!!! I am so thankful for this message. ❤
THANKYOU SO MUCH GIRL
I REALLY REALLY NEEDED TO HEAR THIS BEEN FOREVER NICE
AND I REALLY NEED TO CHANGE
BUT I DO ALWAYS SPEAK MY TRUTH BUT IN A NICE WAY NOT TO HURT OTHERS
GIRL YOU LOOK GORGEOUS
🙏😘✨️💖🕊🌹🧿
Keep being you and ty!!!! 🧿 🪬
True 💯 your hair and skin is giving 🔥💖
Thanks for this upload. Definitely clocked the tea 🍵
Yeeesss 🫰 🫰 🫰
kind > nice
Ngl even though you’re talking to women , as a man I understand the message. Thank you
This warms my heart…. My messages are universal and I appreciate this ….. ty
Your hair is so beautiful
You’re so beautiful!!! I needed to hear this message this morning
Ty!
Kkkk you are saying the truth!
New Subbie!!! Thank you Queen💞Sister!!!
Thanks for subbing!
Hiii just had to come down in these comments to say you’re giving dream girl❤ you’re so beautiful and your voice is amazing. Thank you for the advices.
Ty love
I was NEVER the nice girl to begin with anyhow… nice is for suckers yo…. I’d rather be the real me… I will treat those that I meet on merit only… I’m a kind but cold by nature individual and I’ve always been like this so you can either like me because of this or you can hate me for it but I am not fussed either way… I am that I am and proud to be the me that I am and ain’t nothing or nobody gonna change that no way no how….
Sooooo
There you go !!
Cheers & Ciao ;)’
You are beautiful with a beautiful message for us ladies❤❤❤
Love what your saying.....but the hair!!!
Ty ty ty
What camera are you using coz that video quality is 🔥
Ty… I’m using my iPhone 14… it’s more of the way I edit the video … I’m looking at cameras now but haven’t settled on one yet
Thank you
Great message ❤ (new sub)
Welcome 🤗
@ Thank you 🤗
This is the first time watching.
Welcome … I hope you subscribed .. I would love to have you
@ I loved it and I look forward to learning more. I am getting a notebook just for this so I can keep track of what I learn
I stopped being nice to folks a long time ago.
Why? Because they weren’t actin’ right.
😐
More than enough reason
I have been told by men that I am so nice and they always take advantage of me and don't marry me. The assertive woman always win them over from me.
And now you know to shift that nice girl into a kind women but take no ish… bc you deserve to be cherished
Hair tutorial please❤
I actually have one on my TikTok 😉 … I’ll link it in my description area….
Ppl don't understand or comprehend being nice or kind. Seems like the only language they speak is (cray cray) toxicity, being mean, dismissive, and rude. Most don't even reciprocate when you say good morning or have a nice day. I actually had someone be really mean and sarcastic because I said, "Have a good day hun", she got real indignant and slick at the mouth. I was very confused. I asked my adult son what he thought the problem was? He said she probably thought I was being funny by being nice...
Im 53, and that's the weirdest thing I've ever heard of...
We were taught to be polite, have manners, respect your elders, and be helpful towards others, especially the old & disabled. Which is what I taught my kids. Just being decent and good humans....But this generation is goofy and touched. This zort of rude behavior is especially bad among women in the brown community...
Be nice not weak and naive Stay nice woman of God leave this crap for the devils daughters
Maybe you want to invest into a microphone or change the environment for better acoustics? The content I very helpful
😆 Microphone is being used … you are more than welcome to add the the microphone fund if you like though … what microphone do you use?I didn’t see a video on your channel describing what’s the best 🎤 to use when doing content. But I’ve watched other channels and I use what’s recommended but I want to know which one do you recommend…
PS…. Let your yes’s be yes and your No’s be just so… nicey nice it’s true has no edge and you gotta have an edge about you cos otherwise what’s the point… i mean ‘nice’ always finishes last… no offence….. just sayin
Always !!!!
@ 🙏for replying ;)’
Smh
The word nice is no where in the Bible. God instructs us to be kind. I’m kind…not nice!
This isn't just good information for women , its good for some of us guy's too.
Should i even understand what you're saying?
lol!!! Yes you should… and it’s great for all the nice guys and girls ….