#TheLoveHour
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ต.ค. 2024
- In today's episode Melissa and Kev talk with Josh/ @Joshygonz about how they each deal with having divorced parents.
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Melissa: I was thinking about this in the shower--
Kevin: mmmm *shower*
Josh: *looks into camera like he's on the office*
That part was hilarious🤣
I think he was looking at Greg! Lol!
This is new seeing Josh's face as he speaks. I like it.
It's so strange. 😂🤣
Shayla it’s weird 😂
I know it was kind of weird. lol
Here’s a doozy, my parents were married until I was 5ish got divorced then my dad was never around from then on. When I was 28 I found out he was my siblings bio dad but not mine. I meet my bio dad for the first time 5 yrs later. We build a relationship, he ask me to move to Washington state from Ohio so he could be a could male figure in my son’s life and so we could increase our relationship. A year later I make the move (note: he’s the only family out here) and 3 months later him and his wife split up and he moved to Texas. Try being abandoned by 2 fathers.....as a kid, and again as an adult!. Not healed but my first session starts Monday🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 thanks you three for sharing! Love transparency
That's hurtful! I'm so sorry you went through that.
He moved to texas right after you moved for him? What the hell
Lil Baelien yep! 3 months after I got here. Although it was emotionally realllllllllly hard God ALWAYS made a way! Total strangers from work, a church I visited neighbors had my back! I definitely have healing to do so I can move on.
Sadé Sadé thank you! They say what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger......it felt pretty close to death(more crazy to the story) but I have learned about the strength that is within me
Wow! What a story. I’m proud of you though because you (and your son) survived It all. God is going to heal your heart. He will be a Father to you like no one else can. Jesus is the way.
I am here for everything Melissa is now and everything she will become. She is literally blooming before our eyes (and has been for years).
Yes she is. I agree.
Yes 💛
Yes! I’m here too sis!
2020 LISS IS ON ONE OKAYYYY FRESH OUT THE GATE. “Since we are talking about running and cummin” WHEW THAT TOOK ME OUT.
Right.😂😂
IKR!!! that was hilarious!!!! 10/10 transition
Cleeeeean OUT!!!!!! Kev was so happy! 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣
Too Funny😅🤣😂
OnlyOneSha'la that transition took me out 😂😂😂
When Josh said "I didn't choose this!" - That spoke volumes
100 percent!!
LISS dunked the Blue Chew off the Sam Cooke alley oop that Kev didn’t even know he was throwing! GOAT
That was 💣
When Kev said he ain't going to see his family in 2020, little did he know Covid would make that a reality lol
Yes I said the same thing.
That blue chew transition made me choke I was caught completely off guard, I had to clutch my pearls like "Oh my liss not you"😂😂💀💀
Kev is right on. I also refer to my dad’s wife as my “dad’s wife” because they got married when I was 24. I was GROWN. I didn’t see her as a mother in any sort of sense, but I respected her as his wife.
Jessica Goris did it take you awhile to develop the respect? As of right now even being grown I just refuse
Aubrey Bree Bree Was she the reason your parents split? In my case, as far as I know, my dad and his wife started seeing each other when my parents were separated. My dad didn’t tell us when he remarried (we found out from my mom’s lawyer during the divorce), but I still respected her, -and I should clarify that I mean respect in that I was always civil and polite despite the situation-, because I knew it would be a matter time before one or both of my parents remarry. It just happened earlier than expected. Due to the way we were raised growing up, it would take conscious effort to disrespect her. It’s not who I am.
We don’t get along with her at all now, but that was all her. Despite finding out from a lawyer that she was my dad’s wife, my siblings and I all did our best to adapt to the new addition in our family. Unfortunately, that’s not what she wanted, and we’re not on speaking terms for the most part, but rare times when we’re in each other’s presence, we’re still polite to her.
Kev: Josh don’t be at home. He be in LA taking pictures and stuff.........eating.” 😂😂😂
Mood though 😭😂
JoshyGonz!! From behind the scenes to in the middle seat!!
I love that Joshy spoke on his Love Language
I'm in my cubicle in tears!!! That is not your destiny Liss!!!! You and Kev will break the curse!!!
I agree. Keep doing things differently (like you mentioned speaking up) and going to therapy and I believe y’all will break the curse. I also believe that as Kevin continues in therapy and grows, that he will reach his destiny as a mogul. I remember him saying his dad told him his purpose was making these opportunities happen for other comedians, more so than him being a comedian himself. I look forward to seeing it one day. Be encouraged y’all!!!!
We all seen the Facebook post. I’ll say again, the illustrious Ms. Badu said, “Keep in mind, I’m an artist. And I’m sensitive about my (watchyomouf)” #LissTheCreator
Yes to this hashtag. Spam her into greatness 🗣🗣 #Lissthecreator !!
I love this hashtag! #Lissthecreator
So...this whole conversation is the reason why we work so hard on our marriage. I do not want to cause pain to our kids. Everybody has childhood baggage, but some stuff doesn't have to be part of their story. Loved this episode!
I'm respecting the GANGSTA side of Liss!!! Girl, COME THROUGH, sis!!! I'm proud of you for making your voice heard even more in 2020!!! People need to recognize who YOU are (even outside of Kev). Love it #bookclubboos
I love Liss so much! She is such an inspiration, she don't even know😩. First time I met her during the first tour I couldnt handle it lol!
I love her! We need to support her.
Joshy is so self aware!
I have a crush on Josh. He's caring, reflective and mature. Please find more reasons to interview him. 😍
Josh is experiencing what my friends and I call “we grew up too fast, we saw too much”. Truly enjoyed hearing what Josh had to say clearly and the connection between these three was 100x more evident. Thanks for the honesty and conversation onstage fam ❤️❤️
This is such an open, vulnerable episode. Thank you all for sharing. My parents were married until I was a sophomore in college, but he was always emotional abusive and manipulative. I'd always hoped they would divorce. Now as an adult I have to deal with the damage that having a narcissist, abusive parent has done. My biggest wish in life is to have a successful, happy, functional marriage and family. I urge everyone, especially those with family hurt and pain, to seek therapy. Just because you cannot see or smell a wound does not mean it isn't festering.
As someone who is about to become a stepmom of 2 boys, this episode and comment section has been very helpful. Hugs to everyone involved in a blended family. 🤗
Omg... I was thinking the same thing... Im about to become the stepmom of 4 girls and this episode was very helpful in disclosing the children's side.
As a step child. Quality time. I wasn't feeling my (step) Dad at first. He won me over by spending time with me. On the Saturdays that he had to work he took me with him. I was an only child so he had taken my best friend (Mom) away. He and I are close now. Sometimes closer than my Mom!! He recognized that I had a sperm donor, but he also stepped into the father figure roll. At 75% of my softball games or events when work permitted.
I'm so used to just hearing Josh speak from behind the camera. I like this
Melissa: What was i talking about b4 this
Josh: You were crying.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
It’s a shame that my parent’s toxic marriage affected me more than a divorce. They stayed together and should have gotten divorced 😞
Yes!! I’ve always welcomed the idea of divorce for my parents. And now am struggling with the idea that someone could actually love me and just want to be around me in that way. Because I’ve spent a lifetime seeing my mom be unlovable to her own dang husband.
Exactly... People always talk about how divorce affects the kids, and forget that a toxic marriage can be just as bad... Most times, WORSE... As kids, my sister and I used to pray that my parents would divorce
This!!!!
This!!! People need to understand staying because you have kids hurts the kids way worse then the divorce
THIIISSSSSS COMMENT. I FELT THIS IN MY HEART OF HEARTS.
Josh: "What was the hardest part about it" 😭😭😭Still helpin set up the sponsors even when he a guest🔥🔥🔥🔥
"I turned into a panda spider. The rest is history" 😂😂😂
Let👏🏾. Them👏🏾. Know👏🏾. Liss👏🏾. How they only addressing Kev when she created the show? the audacity of some people! Happy new year and welcome back y'all! It's always nice to see Joshy Gonz. I really hope this episode doesn't make me cry man... 😶. "What's generational and what isn't." Thank you Josh for that epiphany! 🤯
Prayers that one of the therapists calls Kev back. He neeeeeeeds to face his feelings aboit his bio Dad. As usual great episode. I think I suggested talking to your parents on as guests as being a Divorced parent, when suggestions were asked. I think that would still be a great episode as well.
Liss’ segway to the blue chew ad!!! 😂😂😂😂😂
Shemaiah Johnson - I know right!! Her and Angel be killing the commercial segways😆😆😆
"The recesses of your broken heart" It's a scary place to be, but the work is necessary.
Best quote "That man said yes I do and no I don't."
One of the hardest decisions I’ve had to make is to stop going to see family on Christmas. My kids (and I) got tired of going on the “holiday family parade” and not getting to spend time at home on the holidays. I had to put my foot down and establish some traditions at home with my own “lil family”. However, what’s dope is that my mom and dads family grew up together so it’s like just ONE family, but I STILL get some grief from my mom for spending holidays with my dad’s side...even if there’s nothing going on on my mom’s side. 😂 I can’t win. 🤷🏽♀️
Slow and steady
Girl, we were military, so every time we went home, we had to make the rounds. EACH grandma asked “have you seen your other grandma yet”? When I realized they each wanted to know which one I visited first, I started lying!! After years of doing this, it’s like Ma, you have to have a spaghetti dinner and invite everyone over...we go back home exhausted!! Didn’t include my husbands family!!!
Interviewing Josh?! Oh I'm here!
Ah ha ya!
This needs to be a part 2!! I feel like y'all are ending in the middle of a conversation
Listening to Kev talking about his parent missing his games, reminds me of Monica in Love & Basketball when she tells her mother that she only remembered being at 2 of her games when she had played in about 1000 games. Kids perceptions are valid because they just want their parents there for everything they do. I love this episode. It was real but so respectful.
OMG when Josh calls out Kev for covering pain with comedy. Man. To work with people who get you like that is a blessing and a curse.
Coping with comedy is such a real thing 😂
I didn’t realize Kev’s bio dad wanted a relationship with him. I thought he was just MIA. Interesting.
This could be a recent development. We don't know.
Me neither. But I think he mentioned in another love hour podcast that there was some physical violence in his biological parents' relationship.
Same...
He had mentioned that awhile ago when they we're on the R&R tour and he had call him right b4 they were about to perform
@@nikishiasamuel4250 do you remember the name of the video ?
I am so glad I watched this show. The topic is so important. I am a stepmom who is trying to be a great stepmom and stepgrandmom. I appreciate the information on the stress of wanting family to visit and time together. May we recognize the blessing of having so many people who love and like us. Some people have few or none.
MELISSA! LOL! "RUNNING AND C******!" MSMGKLSGLK MELISSA! LOL. Melissa 3.0 is LIT. This episode is amazing already.
Melissa, I just want to encourage you... DO YOUR IDEA!!!! It's going to be amazing, and your family will love it!!! And, it will bring some healing and peace to you too!!! Don't throw the whole idea away just because so many things went wrong this time!!!!
Antoinyce Mathis I think it can still work, clearly it means a lot to her. Maybe she needs to express that to her family esp her parents! Here’s to healing in 2020!
I think it can work, but she'll need to be at peace with any outcome, positive or negative. Because it could be even more scarring if everyone gets together and there's tension or fighting. Sometimes it's just hard seeing period behaving awkwardly out of discomfort. I do think it can work. Just a matter of keeping it light and managing expectations.
Its supposed to happen!! That's why there were so many obstacles. Such a great encouraging comment.
This needs to have a part 2
Trilogy
Josh voice sounds like liquid gold. Did he major in Communications? Great vj voice!
Thanks Melissa for this episode. I was 23 when my parents divorced after 24 yrs of marriage. It has been a painful process and now I’ve finally started to heal by having conversations in 2019. It feels great to hear others that have dealt with this as an adult and shoutout about the hardship of traveling everywhere!! Great way to start off 2020 ☺️☺️☺️
I am an only child that doesn't have a relationship with my dad or his side of the family. Parents divorced when I was two. Also I'm not married with no children. The holidays can be very lonely for me. I wish I had more family to spend the holidays with even it was split between multiple families.
Blessings
Sounds like the next episode of the Love Hour is to finish that conversation Kev avoided. Lol
I’m an adult child of divorce-Mom 4 marriages, Dad 3 marriages....and their history has affected me in my marriage because I feel cursed.
Be STILL!
That’s very heavy- I couldn’t imagine. And the sad point is that divorce are always prone to happen again. The divorce rate is high for 1st marriage and even higher for multiple marriages. It makes me question how can you do marriage without the creator of the thing
My parents' relationship was like Josh's- they co-parented, were friends, kept in contact until my mom died.
Speak ALL👏🏾 THE👏🏾 THINGS👏🏾 Liss.. I need to channel my inner Liss ... My confidence is waaayy low... but I'm learning to articulate my feelings and show up for myself.. looking forward to 2020 with you.😍😍lots of love from the UK
58:50 "It feels like..it feels like destiny" honnneeey water works, I felt that!!
Me too. I'm at work trying to keep it together.
When he said “you jumped out and I didn’t” 😭😭
@@1msdynasty2much Freakin hilarious!
This was an amazing episode! I heard it in podcast and had to watch and comment: In a nutshell:
1. I was 3-ish when parents split they were never married. Mom stayed in the US and dad went back to home country. Mom remarried when I was about 5. They met in ESL school and then I just remember they married and he moved in. He wanted us to call him dad and hated when we talked about our real dad. He was in my life until I was about 12 and then he would leave and return sporadically. He left permanently when I was 16.Best thing he gave us was my little brother.
2. Holidays are just with my mom side of the family which to us is plenty of family. When the other side wants to join it is weird, but they are welcome. But my priority will always be my mom's side and now my home.
3. I feel I have healed but that came in seasons. I had to allow myself time to mourn the fairytale family I made up in my head. I had to face the facts. I had to one day ask myself why I kept holding on to so much anger like a gift or a favorite toy when it is a broken toy. I chose to just call the facts what they were and forgive FULLY! Do I still think about how cool it would be; absolutley, but I am happy with the life I have and the authentic love that is around me.
Melissa, My 16 year old told me one day, "I do not want to know your Dad or see him" I asked why and he says because I see the pain he caused you when you talk about your upbringing and because I do not know him."Melissa, I really feel your Dad is still that awesome man you grew up with and your kids will see him and see your mom and love them so much because you love your parents so much. As long as they reach out to your beautiful boys and just be abuelo and abuela to them. (Granma and Grandpa) They will see and feel the love you grew up with.
I REALLY LOVE that I found your podcast last fall. I am a huge fan and God Bless you guys!
First, I love Josh. Second, I am here for this 2020 Melissa. 🤣 You tell them. Lol Third, I love their dynamic. You can tell that they’re actually friends outside of work. I love being apart of the Stage Krew!
Couldn't help but wonder during this excellent podcast what happened to family reunions as a tradition? My family immediate and extended are spread out all over the country. A summer weekend/weeklong family reunion is a great time to see everyone in 1 place without having to break the bank flying everywhere during different holidays. I hope Melissa's dream of having all the family together can be made a reality someday.
My parents divorce effected all of us (the children) in different ways. My sister and I work harder at our marriages. I saw the economic hardship when each stepdad left or died. That’s why having a viable income was critical to me. In the end, my husband and I choose to love and stay daily!!! That’s why I love your intro song👍🏾
Thank you for this show. My parents are together but honestly shouldn't be and that makes the holidays awkward. I just visit during the holidays out of respect and rest. Seeing the dynamic of an unhealthy marriage between my parents is beyond painful. Keeping silent of their dysfunction is another level of insanity but I'm going to stop typing bc my eyes are tearing up. Lol. Thxs again you all for your transparency. Slowly but surely the healing will come
I totally relate to this experience, but unfortunately, I still live with them so I have to deal with it on a daily basis.
@@ItsJustDiggs my heart aches for you. So much love and strength to you truly. Its soul numbing watching a toxic relationship especially when its your parents
Joshy Gonz!!! I'm here for it 💕
I feel as if divorce traumatizes the kids when they are of age more then it does the younger kids. I think maybe because there were more memories of mother and father being together. But still every situation can be different.
I kinda disagree. I think trauma comes as children are privy to all the nitty gritty of a marriages end. Parents are so in the moment of what's going on in the marriage, that that filter is off. So kids are privy to info and situations they should have no business knowing. Seeing mom and dad fight, hate each other, dad is a cheater, abuse, etc. That's what's traumatizing to kids. Parents that are able to support their kids in the end of a marriage, and co parent effectively, have kids that come out well-adjusted in the end. Things only get messy when people do.
As a child of divorce whose parents separated when I was six, I beg to differ. I hypothesize it hits the same. Except adults have a better chance of having the tools needed to process and cope with the change. Also the emotional unavailability parents tend to have has a harder affect on the developing mind.
Briana Oliver When I tell you 90% of what you just said describes/described my parents relationship you wouldn’t even believe it
I grew up without my father...Now, my mother is “woke” and doesn’t celebrate the holidays. The pressure of the holidays have been alleviated. Before that, I worked in retail management and no one expected me to be at gatherings on time because I would be at work. Fast forward, I spent the holidays at my house in complete solitude and it was wonderful. My love language is Acts of Service followed closely with Words of Affirmation & Quality Time.
Joshy should have rubbed Kev's back. That would have been hilarious!
I love how Kev encouraged the change in her also. I love that. I think that was awesome. He supports her every step of the way. And bc of herself and his support, she is(epic) like a whole entire role model for me now. Both tbh.
And that is why I feel they will make it. Communication and sort from both sides....
@@nikishiasamuel4250 ☺️
WOW, speaking about the holidays Kev unknowingly said we ain't going nowhere for 2020!! Who could have known the truth that he was speaking!
That part! Watching this in 2022
Hands down this is my favorite episode... you guys only scratched the surface on this topic! If you’ve never been through a divorce as a child (or as an adult) you will never understand the ripple effect it has on your life. Like you Kev, I’ve been going back and forth on if I should seek counseling or not. It’s crazy how certain things are “time released” in your future and bring you back to the past that you thought you were completely over.
Adult child of divorce here and when y'all talked about the lack of tradition I FELT THAT! Outside of the additional issues of my family, we don't have anything to pass down to the next generation from our families. I want better for myself and the future clan which is why I went to therapy and suggest it for all of the divorced kids. Love this episode!
I get this 1000%!!! And being married makes it more difficult to navigate at times. My parents divorce when I was 8 and I met my Dad's wife at 14, they got married when I was 17 and I got married at 19. This year we JUST figured out a "grandma name" for his wife, and my oldest will be 10. ON TOP OF THAT my kids always as why my parents are not married because my husbands parents have been together 43 years.
Wow! Liss with the Blue Chew segway! 🤭😂
Amazing episode!! Thanks for this!!
Melissa I feel you 100%. My whole family is divorce and dysfunction. I have 2 aunts that have been married for over 20 years. Because I've scene so much dysfunction I feel like I am destined to fail. When is my time for happiness gonna be up. When will I lose all my joy and peace. I've worked so hard to get to a place were there is peace in my home, my family, no dysfunction. I want to maintain this forever but nothing around makes me feel like this is possible.
I am in the same boat. Marriages in my family generally don’t survive, and the ones that do are not love-filled.
My parents got divorced when I was 4, met my stepdad at 5. I'm 41, still dealing with it
I'm honestly interested in learning more about Kev's relationship with his bio dad because ... same. I grew up with an amazing stepfather, but I still have abandonment issues with my bio dad, guilt with feeling like my stepdad should be enough, resentment, etc. I think Liss would have a lot of helpful insight into how to address pain/healing and it would be a good episode! Either way, loved the poddie
Such a Powerful conversation.....Kudos to Liss for opening up and being genuine and vulnerable.....👏👏👏👏👍👍👍
So many thoughts, but I will just share one. The ability to heal from the fear that "divorce is inevitable because of my family history" seems impossible. Having both of my parents married 3 times each to other people, and only my grandparents' long (and unhappy) marriage to look up to...its looking bleak. But I will say that I share that same faith in our God that generational patterns and beliefs can be broken, in Jesus' name! Melissa, thank you for creating such a wonderful platform for self exploration. I look forward to more of Melissa 3.0! (Also...Get Kev to sit on somebody's couch. I can't wait to hear of his breakthrough).
How did I miss this episode? My story is most similar to Melissa's. It's so validating to hear the similarities but also makes me sad that these feelings won't get better. I've been counting on getting married to start my own thing but now I know there will probably always be that little piece of guilt/aggravation
I needed this episode, my parents were never married and they were together until I was about 4 or 5 and then separated and then I stayed with my mom, her boyfriend, my brother and sister, and when I turned 6 I made the decision to stay with my godmother who raised me until this day
LOL That Blue Chew transition was 🔥!!!😂😂😂
I love me some Joshy... he’s so damn cute!
Sort of a different perspective here, but I now deal with the effects of my parents NOT getting divorced. They separated twice before and I remember coming home from school daily, wishing my father had decided to leave again. About 10 yrs ago, my mom told us that divorce had come up when we were kids, but they stayed together for us. My sister and I told her that was probably the worst thing they could have done. We feel like things would have been much better for us all if they had decided to divorce.
Nicole this was my experience - I always wished my parents would separate growing up then my parents talked about separating when I was 10 (I was over the moon), but they then renewed their vowels instead and I always resented my dad. Fast forward to age 17 my parents finally separated and divorced. Then plot twist - they got back together 3 years later. I’m now turning 24 and am only just now becoming at peace with my parents being together. But whew me and my siblings went through it and our family dynamic is so different but getting better. It’s like our family was deconstructed and had to build from scratch again as young adults and face our wounds head on
@@AestheticJunkiex Wow! Plot twist indeed. I always thought I was wrong for hoping they'd split, but I see now that it isn't uncommon. And, like you said, choosing to stay together sometimes causes resentment. I feel like I also hold resentment towards my mom for putting up with my father all this time. Surprisingly, I still live with them (at 35), and things have gotten much better, but at this point they are just putting up with other because it is probably easier than going through divorce.
That’s how it was for me and my siblings. My parents FINALLY divorced when I was 24 and I was SO HAPPY. My mom didn’t grow up with her dad, so she wanted to raise us in a 2 parent home. We understood her, but we told her that them staying together when it was obvious to us that the marriage was toxic, led to all of us having our own issues stemming from it.
miss the podcast, had to come back
You shouldn’t feel bad for letting people know how you DESERVE to be treated Melissa but as women we often do. You work really hard and deserve recognition for it. Stay blessed 🧡
I’m so glad y’all had this conversation. I can relate on so many levels and that holiday anxiety/exhaustion is so real that I just don’t even try anymore. I do whatever is most convenient and comfortable for me, my husband and our kids.
Loved this episode! My parents got divorced when I was 8 and it left some scars that I discovered as an adult. My dad never really wanted me in his life and cared more about being with his friends and getting his swerve on. Because of this we were left in a financial struggle and I always felt guilty that I couldn't fix things and give my mom the life she deserved. To this day I feel like a failure even though we're doing ok. I never was able to voice any frustrations or concerns that I had to the fullest as a kid and teenager because I believed all of that would put unnecessary pressure on my mom. So as an adult I internalize my issues and cope with it by ignoring it or eating something sweet.
This is such a great episode.
Has Liss done an episode about the 2.0 and 3.0 versions of herself? This stage is definitely something worth having an episode about.
Hey Liss, I've never really watched the love hour because I'm 18 and have no love in my life, but I really enjoyed this episode and I watched an episode from a few weeks back the other day and you have really done better with not speaking over others!!! You're doing great and I'm excited to watch more episodes and learn for the future!
I completely slept on this episode...my parents never divorced...battled with Domestic violence my entire childhood..separated .but always bounced back until I was 12...they separated for good...still hated each other...long term relationships with other people still fought like cats and dogs...until my mother transitioned ...my fathered remarried. 7years later...after he told me this relationship is the only time he's ever been in love...which to me is trash considered all the unnecessary childhood trauma I had to deal with...Thanks Dad... I am now in school to become a therapist to heal myself and also help others understand how childhood trauma doesn't end once you become an adult...infact it often stunts your emotional growth.. 43% healed...
Listening to this episode I realize I still suffer from my childhood trauma with my parents
Great discussion 👍!!! I have a step dad that has been in my life since I was 10 yrs old and I am 46 now. I consider him as my Daddy. Even though my biological father wasn't in my life; I still longed for him. I am still trying to heal that little girl inside. So, I can relate to Kev's struggle.
tomeciaedwards great comment. Same!
Wow, u just spoke on my VERY life.
I just found my bio-dad in Sept 2019, after 43 years of not knowing him. Sad part is that he just died on January 2, 2020 so ANY plans to get to know each other died with him...
@@brangeeellis3083 sorry to hear about your loss. My biological father passed away last year too. It was hard to grieve for someone I didn't know.
Melissa Crying got me wishing I was there to NOT rub her back. This convo is amazing.
Melissa’s transition into that Blue Chew ad, y’all made me slap laugh my desk at work 😂 omg she kills it 🙌🏾
Y'all are hilarious! Love this show!!! Thank you for paving the way for young black women, Melissa!
I loved this episode ❤️❤️I have soooooo much to say.
Me and my hubby are products of divorce. My parents are both remarried. My dad has been with my step mom since I was 10 but sometimes I still struggle calling her my stepmom. Just because they didn't get married until I was 18/19
My parents are great at coexisting and everyone are good friends.(my mom invited my dad and step mom to her wedding. My parents even danced together)
My husband's parents on the other hand are the COMPLETE opposite. Even after 15+ years there is still major tension. My husband has a great relationship with his step mom to the point it is offensive to call her step mom (we call her bonus mom)
Holidays have been a struggle since we married and moved closer to family. (we're currently stationed in Fayetteville. My hubby's fam is in SC mine is in GA). Everyone wants to see us and gets jealous if we spend more time with one parent over the other. This has been a major struggle for me since I've never had these issues before. (my mom always got Christmas my dad always got new year and we rotated Thanksgiving)
I feel like I'm completely healed from the divorce however I do still have a scar because I'm afraid of the pressure to break the generational curse of divorce(my MIL always says that we will break the curse)
I've learned since recently having a baby that while I can try to visit everyone but not at the expense of my peace. My number one priority is making sure MY FAMILY has its own traditions ❤️❤️❤️
Great episode I love the topics you come up with Melissa. And even when others recognize it just know you're stepping into your purpose ❤️❤️❤️💖💖
I feel you Kev. I grew up without my father and for years i harbored a deep hatred to a man that would do that to my mother (firstly) and myself. I went through a lot of traumas in different situations because of that absence. I even found him on facebook just to find out he had a whole family with a daughter my age and some younger. But i spent the last 3 years going through all of that hurt and trauma WITH GOD to finally be at a place of forgiveness and understanding. Its was NOT an easy process. I had to open up and pour my heart out to God and then spend a lot of time reading the bible for the answer, as well as being around spiritual minded people who He could speak through. I had to learn to let myself cry and accept my mistakes. BUT IN THE END, my faith, love and loyalty to God has grown soooo much. This isnt to say therapy isnt important but the closeness you gain when you bring go into is amazing. Remember, He is a father for the fatherless. I am 26
I literally typed out my story and it was exhausting lol. I'm a mix of all 3 of you to some extent. I have 3 sets of "parents"... Raised by my stepdad, met bio dad at 10, mom and stepdad divorced about the same time I met bio dad (stepdad stayed in my life), and mom remarried when I was 20. Thankfully, they're all cordial because well, I tell them they have to be or I won't see any of them because I ain't got time. I'm not married yet, but we're moving in that direction, and he ain't got none of the complex dynamics I got!! lol. Unfortunately, his Dad passed, but he got 1 mama! Amen.
I have a stepfather not from divorce but because my dad passed away and my mom remarried. My mother and father were together since my mom was 14. She has been remarried for about 4 years and I just stopped referring to her husband as my moms husband.
Just want to say lis, I think you're doing great with allowing others to get their point across. Also you made me cry when you began to talk about how you feel about divorce running in your family. Keep up the great work, I see your growth.
I connected with this episode so much and it really made me realize my own level of healing with my parents' divorce. It also made me wonder how my kid will one day reconcile having a step-parent and that whole dynamic. Whew...this was a lot, but a great discussion.
I lovedddddd every second of this show. Omg it was everything!!!
I didn’t feel like I had to take sides when my parents divorced. I told both of them I’m on no one’s side. Wrong is wrong. Depending on the topic, sometimes it was my mom, sometimes it was my dad. Due to that, both of them accused me of being on the other person’s side, and I was like, 🤷🏾♀️, in this particular case you’re wrong, so...
😂😂
3 different houses on Christmas for the last decade of my life. So I feel that guys. My parents were together for a hot 5 years and then said it just wouldn't work. I can say I was 100% healed by 8 years old cause my parents were never good together. However, I still worry about my future marriage and family. I think it's normal to be apprehensive about marriage lasting and the only way to handle it, is to actively try and bring positivity and growth to the table. Don't dwell on the negative by yourself. Share it with others and be open to perspective
Positive vibes
What I did last year2019 was a Friendsgiving and friendsmas corny but I go through the same thing josh does .. I just tell everyone that I’m celebrating with my friends . I hear the blah blah and move forward .
Watching this for the first time in 2022, it's interesting because of how much you all mentioned needing a break from those familial expectations to show up during the holiday and COVID shut everything down two months after this posted. As unfortunate and impactful as the pandemic has been, I think that we all needed a reset and time to evaluate and prioritize our needs even with our families.
Ughhhhh I wish i could like this a million times its Joshy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! omg!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍