Living With The Narcissist's Drama
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ต.ค. 2024
- The narcissists drama and chaos are common tools used to control, manipulate and terrorize their victims. Break the cycle of drama, chaos, insanity and destruction....leave and never go back
www.paypal.me/...
no matter what i knew i couldn't live with the "drama" rollercoaster. came from a chaotic, abusive home with a narc father. when i found myself ensnared in the beginnings of a "relationship" with a narc the gut uneasiness was a neon sign for me. for every pleasant minute there were 100 unpleasant ones. i knew i deserved better. i feel for all who are neck deep in the madness. i hope for all to come to the realization that narcs have nothing to give, period. my wish is for all to experience the peaceful ocean of life without narcs.
"we apologize for them " ..
a profound realization.....whew !
Waiting for the shoe to drop was the worst! Constantly trying to figure out what drama is he going to start now? I was sad when I got free, but also very relieved.
Hey, Miss Kim!
I'm with you on the drama-free, peaceful home environment.
More and more, 100 days out, I seem to be coming back to ME.
I still am exhausted from all the energy it took to plan and arrange for the move, and my body learning to "reset" itself from "ALERT!" mode, for when the ex would RAGE or go silent. The "What's next?!" state of stress I tended to go into.
So tired, yet, and recuperating.
Drama, drama, drama!
I watch a movie now, instead of living the "drama"!!!
❤️
I and my children have had no contact for 90 days. Still looking for all of my pieces.
Alice Pawlowich
It may take a while, Alice.
I'm dealing with the physical fallout of the stress from the relationship with the ex and working on righting it all. So far, exhaustion is heavy.
Blessings for you and your children.
I got to the point that all I could think during one of his 2+ hour long performances was ~ I could have sold tickets for this shit! Shaking, crying, jumping up and down, kneeling, red-faced spitting, crying out to the heavens... OY VEY. Once again you nailed it! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
My worst day is nothing compared to my best day with the narcissist.
It's peaceful without their drama. I have one thing to be grateful for every day for the rest of my days. I am grateful that i have one more peaceful day away from the narcissist. I am grateful that i got to this point where i can say, i successfully got away from that drama queen/king.
The confusion exists only until u see them for what they are- which happens one fine day. After that it is not possible to pretend to "unsee" what u see. The "horns and fangs" of the Ndemon have just flashed before ur eyes. Some have tails too...
7000 subscribers now! congratulations Kim. You've been helping me since you hit 2000.
I thought 100 subscribers was completely unbelievable....who knew there were so many of us.
Kim you are so right to the point on the trap and the walking on eggshells that we find ourselves living in which a!so isolates us from others and things we love. Getting free from narc abuse is one of the hardest things we will ever go threw. On the other side we find out so much more about ourselves, and can live our lives again free for these demons!
The DRAMA is a expanding helium balloon that eventually HAS to explode.No matter what is said or done THINK first "does this make sense?" If not don't react, it's a lie. Ask youself "do I love this entity" or am I here for another reason. LOVE does not present in abuse of any kind.
Kim You explain it so well. The way they suck the joy right out of life. And yes...... the utter peace that follows. ^j^
I love my freedom. I love my peace. My friends and family are back in my life. Kim... I watch you everyday thank you!!
Thanks, Kim! Sooooo right on about every event getting weirder!!!!!! You're such a beautiful woman with a beautiful spirit. Keep on exposing these soul sucking meat suits for what they are. We've got your back!
Life does get easier without the narcs need to push every button that could possibly be pushed. He would start a fire, add gasoline and then act the victim. WOW! Glad to be narc free!
Justification projection victimhood blaming avoidance control etc etc etc
Yep! Huge shame and fear!
Get you before you get them!
Exactly...it all comes down to love for yourself. A narcissist will take all your love and then continue draining you. It really comes down to whether you want to sacrifice yourself for them. Im glad you admitted Kim that you weren't happy leaving; because I feel the same way. I left my ex and know she is still hurting. It saddens me to know she still hurts, but deep down I know it is because its all she knows and that she in reality doesn't want out. She does but her illness won't let her. The hardest part for us empaths is that we feel like we can save them. We can't. Plain and simple.
misery....such an apt description. The worst part for me are the bombs he plants in my brain. Remarks made in passing, just a little comment here or there, that at the time don't seem like a big deal...seemingly completely innocent and harmless but then you find yourself awake at 5AM with that comment swimming in your head on repeat. Like a bomb planted then hours or days later they press the button to detonate. And you find yourself shaking, confused, angry, hurt, frustrated, and sad...so very, very sad....with your eyes wide open to how vile and spiteful and hateful and intentionally hurtful what they said was. And it was said with a smile on his face and followed up with an "I love you." Mindfuckery at it's best!!! They are MASTERS of it too!!
I love your channel, your delivery is caring and hilarious at times. Much love and light to you!
Listening to this video really made me remember how terrible my relationship was. I've been having a few very bad days (I thought I was improving) so I needed to hear this. It really was all high anxiety. The constant agreeing with him so not to make him angry. Doing everything to please him or make him angry. Since he's been gone I haven't had anything weird happening. Just peace. It's strange. It's like something feels wrong almost because I must have got used to the chaos. It takes some adjustment.
gmofree - Yes I absolutely do that. I can hear the words like he's really saying them. Even his sisters spiteful words to me keep replaying, how I lost the best thing, like maybe it really is me...maybe it really was my fault he hurt me. He's been silent for nearly 5 months now except for a message from his sister to my daughter asking for his DVD's back. (Which I never gave back). I'm waiting for the phone, the doorbell...to see him or one of the flying monkeys when I'm out. I know he's trying to punish me for refusing to allow him to see the other woman and lie to me. I feel now maybe I was wrong to ask this of him.
THEY ARE THINKING ABOUT THE DISCARD ALREADY.
I used to like bad boys and live in a movie/Disney film but not anymore. I like peace now too. I find narcs are very very stubborn and besides sympathy there's no point in trying or staying. I still feel bad for my narc.
In the abuse shelter, there were workshops too. They talked about ambient abuse. Their seething volcano anger is always present. walking on eggshells. that it's in the air but you can't put your finger on it. their little digs, insults, put downs, always me me me me.
I know that there were certain things he did, to piss me off or make me angry. I knew what it was that made me angry but, at that time, he had already groomed me not to argue back, because, the arguments were so explosive, i didn't even want to go there. that was the manipulation of, if you resist me, i will explode on you like nobody's business.
now, when you have enmeshment in your life with a narcissist and he pulls this shit on you, you think, omg, what am i going to do?
Kim omg he makes me say sorry for answering back and him getting angry 😡 I just think what Am I saying sorry for iv done nothing wrong.
Now o have a narcissist chick who I work with she makes my day awful unbearable most of the time it's draining and upsetting , I just want to leave my job but I not have the energy to go looking for a new job ,
So Kim the other night I told myPartner all shit going on at work then later that night when we were going to bed he said oh we have to swap the cars around so I said Just park mine on the lawn in the morning well he went of his head said I was screaming at him bla bla then I got my keys and walk out to move my car he came on behind me slammed the front door this was like after 10.30pm then put side he scream at me move your f**k car then when in my car he was trying to reverse into my car , I said to him there was no need to get hostile over moving the cars and yep once again he blamed me for saying Judy move my car in the morning omg ,
Blessing Kim 💛❤️❤️💜
My narc loved drama. No peace for me. I would wonder why we just couldn’t live in peace. He wouldn’t have any of that
good 4 u Kim it's been 18 months since I Kicked out my 8yr relationship narc. out and what does he do takes off from 2 provinces away, cleaning me out and abandoned my son, and now my son is a Narrassist x2 to me. I am traumatized as the abuse never stops.. . 8 do know it ain't my fault but I'm traumatized and beyond depressed
Hopefully your son will realize that you are not the bad guy in the big picture. Narcs are known to brainwash their children against their spouse.
Marina Liteyears it's actually his step dad he's came 8n his life at 13, as my son is now 22. and at the time boys at the age kinda need a man and my son idolized him, he made me look like I'm the crazy every chance he got I got in trouble for stupid shit my son did or pit him down to hurt me yet never saying a word to him as soon as my son got home it bec"like high buddy" he poisoned my son against me without realizing it and I blame myself, but I honestly didn't know until I Kicked his loser ass out 18 months ago wiped me out clean and took of off out of ontario to New Brunswick so 18 hr drive. and my sin even called up on father's day he never called him Dad but even to me he feels as thoe that's the closest thing to a dad I have. I have had many talks with him as what is scary is that he is going to end up being a police officer he's already graduate college and is a work alcoholic as he has 3 high paying jobs I'm treated like his slave I'm really sick, we had to move and he didn't pack a box or unpack I had to hire them and he makes double the m8ney I do. I had him at 18, hrs 98% dead inside if asshole didn't take off he wouldn't be half as bad as in the end the odd time he tell my son to lay off me, my son only stuck up for me once... but in the end my son finially got to see his true colours that I was trying to tell him, my son does not care about me only himself he has no remorse no conscious and a liar over stupid shit. he has psychically emotionally and mentally hurt me more than my X. I get he only 21 as he will b 22 in fall, but he can't keep his word on anything I have given this kid cars in 3 yrs, I helped either his finances during college. he has never hugged me or say I'm sorry I didn't even get a happy mothers day .... he wished death upon me. and just find out I have ovarian cancer and malagia in my face, and I'm only 39, but 3. I also am an Empath and I keep attracting them the malagia in my mouth is all from stress, and when I finially told my son his first words was GREAT WHAT AK I GOING TO DO. no hug no support and he still verbally and mentally abuses me. 8 have no family or friends and I love all ya guys as u got friends all over the world too but I so need someone that could be here as I'm totally lost ... I'm beyond traumatized not just by the 8yr NARC... what a waste of my youth, all I get is guys I wouldn't date ask me out or talk to them, tried that and even ripped the bandaid from day 1; telling them I don't want a BF any time soon, as I'm pretty dead honest after being compulsively lied to for 8yrs and I've had the best ever 3 guy friends but they were my parents age and after a year or 16 months they both left me once they realize I never liked them in that matter and I'm from a small town and the woman here are crazy u can't trust them and they will literally go to the extremeties of trying to ruin your life not all of course.. I'm in a prison in my own mine, I finially got approved to see a trauma psychologist as it's privatized as in Canada not all things are covered!!! as all this has done too 8s trigger my traumatized child hood 2. I am a very spiritual person and not religious spiritual. I do not talk to my X he does not care! I know it's not my fault, but I need serious help and the funny thing which isn't funny I wouldn't need a trauma doctor if I had friend or a strong support system that genuinely has the best interest in me as I'm stuck I'm 39 yrs old but I don't know how to do anything for myself I need guidance I'm so codependent that it's quite sicking .... yet b4 I met him I was happy and had a great paying job that man has literally destroyed my life destroyed my son, and destroyed me as a person and when he left thing only got worse when j broke up with that man wasn't be caused I didn't love him I learned to love myself more
Lyn Kent he's not a child anymore he will b 22 in the fall and I have had several conversations as my son is worse than my X times 2. he refuse to get help as he can't look like he's got issues as he wants 2 b a cop so the abuse keeps rolling on me and it's my own son I literally have my life to him since 17
Lyn Kent you are a very kind person, I most defintley will. TY as 1 person that cares truly makes a difference many blessings LYN
My turning point is when he openly admitted that he could not handle when a relationship was going smooth, that he had to shake it up and add some "fire." I knew in that moment I would never have a peaceful life with this man, never be truly happy, and the drama and chaos he claimed to have no part of, was exactly what he needed to create in order to keep whatever demon lived in him alive. I left the following weekend, after more drama, and chaos. Like you Kim, I live a peaceful existence now. I have my normal stressors in life, but no more of the confusion and drama that comes with living in his "house of pain."
In her more lucid aka drunk moments my ex would say " I'm so fucked up " ....but no therapy for them - just me because " I'm the sick one"
My piece of shit narc would do everything in his power to dump as much pain and drama and despicable hell on me and then would say to me in a calm voice "why are you so miserable?" He would absolutely do that all the time to me.
Near the end when he was desperate, and faking depression, I would try to talk to him.
I would try to talk to him and say things like, "even if it doesn't work out, you can always call me a friend." "i really want this to work out, and, we are strong people who can do this." but, of course, even being a friend to the narcissist won't cut it.
they are living in a fantasy world. to talk about their problems would be the death of them. to admit that they may have possibly calculated something wrong, or misinterpreted something so slight, would be the death of them.
Good for you Kim
Love your work
I told people that I was in a type of hostage situation. While he was horribly, mercilessly disarming me with screaming, spit flinging in my face, throwing things & dumping things, cruel to my dogs, he was doing things so fast, changing subjects, meeting up with strange visits from people on my prop...on & on, besides intentionally ranting into the night to keep me awake all nite, he would leave for hours so that I could mourn my losses. I couldn't leave. I was disrupted and in traumatic shock. He wasn't my boyfriend. Just let him stay in my driveway with his dog over nite. I have always lived alone except for bad relationships short lived. Neighbors thought we a couple. He grab me hug when I try puss away.... show neighbors everything ok. They then turned cold shoulder even when I screamed and screamed at nite outside, no one would come. They say u allowed it. So, everyone, this is happening to many hostage people that are presented as having a healthy relationship, but are puppets to these murderous people who are made of pure hate. The way they were abused in childhood? They act it out upon you.
Be more alert about this because you'll be next, especially since so many homeless want YOUR property and your $ and your Soul.
No Bull. I am a victim, released by a miracle. He still stalking. He still not done with me.
Hi Kim,
As always live your videos. I noticed that you said you're not happy about the breakup. this concerns me only because I'm happier than I've been in a very long time. Now we've been apart for two weeks after many separations. I don't have anyone special in my life. I'm just hoping this new found happiness isn't temporary.
thanks again.
Hi Sandra, I should have been more clear. I am so happy the relationship is over, but I have never been in a relationship that didn't end in a lifelong friendship. Oh God, I am so glad it is over.
Kim Wilson TV
Thank you Kim. you absolutely helped me to realize that I was with an empty meat suit and there never was a relationship. just didn't want to ever go back to feeling sad and missing that empty vessel after waking up to the reality. Take care.
I was and I am destroy to the core of my soul.
Guilt, guilt, save her, poor her...
My fault, I trust her. I trust her so beautiful words.
I trust in love and in the good in human, in her...
I can't let her, after she share all her misery. After so much pain.
But...I need. She is sadist. She inflict herself pain and made evil betraye just to tets my love, my attachment, to punish me if i'm not her total slave or if I have wounded her so huge ego in response of her shit tests.. To reject me in the worst, because she think I will before she does.
And to feed her black hole.
Thank, Kim. I need you. Thanks.
I could identify with this so much I found the walking on eggshells more traumatic than actual rages it was like going to the store with him or driving in the car with him it was just even if it was quiet I was shaking cuz I was so scared when's the next time he's going to rage but even on his down times he was still agitated he was still was always in a bad mood always huffing and puffing nothing was good enough come on why am I upset that I'm done with this man I should be happy I'm free
OMFRICKENGAWWWd! He told me those EXACT words “u don’t know how to love me”! Goosebumps!!! and ya know, come to think about it....fifteen years...I don’t think he’s EVER saying “I’m sorry”, EVER, for anything 🤔
They push boundaries and laugh and punish when you do
story of my life. Drama and torture... No rest for the wicked they say and its so true. If there isn't a real problem he will make one up....... Claiming that he was recording me. Um No. he wasn't but who wants someone to think they are being recorded. It is complete and utter misery. I have a flinching reflex now because of his sneaking up on me. He has no limits to what he seems willing to do. 19 years and 11 years married and the last straw was taking me to massage for 3 years and then wanted to have a different person touch me etc. What he was trying to do??? I felt a weird sick feeling and I told him NO- I will never go there again. Its 6 months now after stopping the massage and I do not want to go back to that ever... Life is going on but he keeps pestering me about the massage. I am trying to move on but this constant drama is going to have to go....
Thanks Kim, Your bravery shows through. I also felt sorry for my 'tortured' narc but every day when I was in his created hell I would go into my spare room I set up for my beautiful budgerigars and cry and cry my heart out to release the pain. Their adorable little faces would tilt and they could see my sadness. They looked worried about their mum. I knew it wasn't making them feel good to have them see me like this. That helped me realise I had to take action to get him out of my life. Their love and care of me and mine for them helped spur me on. The narc wanted them out of their warm room (where I have a garden arch for them to play on) and in a cage outside. My love for them would never allow that and their love for me drove me to change. Love wins Kim and I think we are living proof of that : )
Wow I can't actually believe how many evil people walk umongst us. Don't get me wrong I knew my narc was not alone, but i'm so shocked that there are so many.
I am going to stay single for a good while.
KIM so glad you got out and as sad as I am that this happened to you , I am also thinking had you not I would not have survived without your knowledge , To any one new on here HOLD ON AND STAY CLOSE !! It gets better !! Just stay close ! AND STAY NO CONTACT !
Always remember that you are not in love with the narc. You are in love with their mask and their fairy tale.
I'm living in a constant flow of crazy making bullshit! I feel out of breath have chest pain everyday, he's always upset about something. I'm over it. Looking to move.. :)
Yes ! You are always waiting for the next fire , this is so true . You know the stuff they do is just insane and if you don't get help it will make the victim/survivor insane too . Their goal is to force a nervous breakdown and their ultimate goal (in my opinion ) is if you committed suicide . I just love how they blame everything on you , that's always fun =/...NOT .
I agree with every word. For me, I find that the times between explosions were only quiet because I was more or less in compliance mode. Jumping through hoops trying my very best to keep the peace.. which of course, really wasn't that peaceful anyway. Totally selling myself out. Sending countless screenshots of my call log, text log, endless amounts of proof had to be given daily to show that I wasn't cheating.. just utter fucking madness, really. :(
Lmfaooooo I love how you speak
Wow! Great topic.
Ya! Kim hi! You know wee keep hearing about the narcissists being shame based to the core! But! That shame is justified based on how they lived, and treated others!......so I say let there shame build! Until it bursts. Shame is a byproduct of guilt! They are guilty to the core! Because they love shame! It's an aphrodisiac to them! Not
viagra ! lol......again thanks for your sharing.
His eyes are evil. His pic scared me. My x 's eyes would go black. All the wedding pics he has an uncomfortable weird narc smirk. The reception seemed more about him marrying his mom. seemed weird.
I also did research and did you know that beung a victim of narrassism can't generate it's own brain disease I shit ya not! and many will never recover .... I sure in the hell not going to b one of those I don't play the victim card anymore to others all I want is to move forward I don't see him and due to being so far away I don't hear about him and my son does not discuss his phone calls or anything.... the last time I ever will have 2 see that loser is when my son gets married bad enough last year after we broke up he came down 3x the last time I refused for him to sleep over as he was last down Oct 1st for my son's 21st Bday and he has never came back again. and he's living it up with a good paying job as his mommy moved there 2 yrs ago and that's where he ran 2.
I love your referencing your narc as, "piece of shit."
I did a lot of things for that rat. out of guilt he pushed on anyone can get guilted into something if they don't know they are dealing with a covert narcissist.
Aaah!!! The damn drama……….I wanted peace n joy ……n I got the opposite….lol……oh n the *** triangulation oh no……but now I feel FREE FREE FREE……..
after leaving him, i realized that i did the strongest thing possible. i endured a 13 year relationship with a crazy person who needed their pampers changed every three hours.
I held up the fort. I was doing everything. They whined about their diaper needing a change.
pretty much.
Forced also to make that very choice. It's been three months. You describe what happened exactly.
Just love Kim Trevor and my Narc could have been separated at birth Spot on with the drama In discard I was told that he fell in love with my potential Why did you marry me for? oh yeah my empathy. Constant drama,and abuse.
I always kept my own place for me and our son while he had a house. 10+ yrs and we never even talked bout making the move to live together. I hated being in his home or even sleeping there. You can feel the evil. So i never actually lived with him. Deep down I always knew I guess. It does bring me pleasure to hear that the bitch he left us for and married is probably living in true hell. Sorry not sorry.
Yes, difficult, self-absorbing, now I get why I was so tire when I was with him………later when I left I had so many questions. Finally I got answers, these narc vids. I see it as occult information, like is there in front of me but I could not see it before but now I do.
Jeremiah 33:3 3 ¨Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and hidden things you do not know.¨ I know understand this better.
💜
if I can send you the email from his NS and after all that why would you help him buy a car and let him quit his job and she have 3 children that's not his I don't understand I loved him but kim I wasn't that weak I no something was wrong